Aftermath of a Fallen Star

by Rated Ponystar

The Returning Student (Sunset Shimmer)

I breathed Equestrian air for the first time since I tried to steal the Element of Magic from Twilight Sparkle three years ago. I was back in the world that I had been born into, but this time I was not here to cause misfortune like I did last time. I was here for forgiveness to the one pony who had been like a mother to me since my parents died.

My friends back home had offered to come with me, but I told them I had to do this on my own. Plus, it would be very weird if we had two Rainbow Dashs, Fluttershys, Applejacks and Raritys. And I don’t think any world can survive with two Pinkie Pies.

It felt weird, walking on four legs again, but I quickly adapted and found myself not in the strange crystal like palace last time, but the more familiar royal palace in Canterlot. I bit my lip, unsure of what to do now. It was an unscheduled visit, I’m sure, but would Princess Celestia or Twilight be expecting me? The time limit for the mirror had passed and would be open for the next few days.

My thoughts were soon interrupted when a royal guard I failed to notice saw me and narrowed his eyes. “Halt! Who goes there!”

I gulped, trying to avoid my instincts to flee. Last time I was here I did a criminal act. Despite Twilight forgiving me, would Celestia have, I wondered. “I-I’m Sunset Shimmer. I-I came through the mirror and...”

The guard relaxed. “I see. We were told you might appear. I’ll let Princess Celestia know you’ve arrived from the other world. Please wait here.”

I let out a sigh of relief as he left the room, leaving me to wait. I looked around and saw there wasn’t much to this room. It was small, a bit dark, with a few works of art here and there, but nothing else. The guard soon came back and nodded. “Follow Private Shell here. Princess Celestia is waiting for you in her quarters.”

I was soon greeted to my first surprise that day. A changeling guard. I knew what they were, having read about them in myths as well as learned of the invasion when I came back a long time ago. To see one here, in uniform, made my jaw drop. The changeling saluted to his fellow guard and motioned me to follow him.

My jaw found it’s way back to proper place as I slowly did, not fully trusting the creature that had been known to steal love from ponies. Of course, he smiled at me as we walked down the halls. “I’ve been notified that you’ve been out of Equestria for some time. It must seem strange seeing a changeling like myself walk around in plain daylight, undisguised.”

“The thought has crossed my mind,” I replied, feeling the nostalgia of walking through the same halls I once did as a filly. Nothing had really changed so much. It still held the same warm feel to it, just like bathing in the sun. Yet for some reason it felt much less joyous. Like something had taken some of the happiness in the palace and it never returned.

“There are few of us in the Equestrian military now. Ever since we became allies with the ponies, things have started to look up for us, despite the hardships. We even have some griffins and donkeys joining,” said Private Shell.

Now I was really wondering what the hell (sorry, I meant hay, but being in the human world for so long you tend to get used to the lingo) had been going on since I left. Twilight had told me she wanted to change things in Equestria, particularly based on how we did things in the human world.

“Guess, she really did change things,” I muttered to myself.

Before I knew it, I was in front of the familiar doors that lead to my old mentor’s room. The private saluted before leaving, but I didn’t say anything. I was too busy trying not to run away.

Running away.

That’s how this mess started didn’t it? I ran away, I said I hated her. I... was so horrible.

How could she still love me after all these years?

Slowly, I reached for the handle and opened it, revealing Princess Celestia, waiting for me with a warm smile on her face. “Welcome home, my precious student.”

At that moment, I knew she still loved me. The look in her eyes, the calmness of her voice, the loving smile she always gave me no matter what. I knew she loved me. Tears overcame me as I rushed in and hugged, sobbing loudly in her embrace. I felt the warmth of the sun in her forelegs as I took in her embrace. I was back with my mentor, my friend, my mother. “I’m sorry! I’m so sorry!” I cried out, shame and guilt in my voice as I thought back to all the ponies and humans I hurt in my arrogance and greed. “I don’t hate you! I love you! I love you and I am so sorry for all the things I did!”

“I know, Sunset,” she whispered to me as she stroked my head. “And I forgive you. You are not the first to make a mistake and you will not be the last.”

“But... I hurt you... I hurt so many...”

“And have you sought to fix this?” she asked, smiling.

I nodded. “It... it wasn’t easy... but most of them... they all forgave me... befriended me even.”

“Then you have made me proud,” Celestia whispered. “Now you know that true magic is not being an alicorn or a princess, but with the friends you treasure in your heart.”

“Yeah, Twilight taught me that. Where is she anyway? I want her to know how I... I...”

I then saw something I had never seen before in my entire life. Crying. My teacher was crying. They were not tears of pride or joy, but tears of sorrow. Loss.

I felt my heart twist as I touched her shoulder. “What’s wrong? What happened?”

Celestia took a deep breath. “I’m sorry, Sunset. Two years ago... Twilight Sparkle was killed.”

I had demanded to see the body. I knew about the memorial garden's for the past apprentices and if Twilight was anywhere, she was there. I didn’t believe it. I didn’t want to believe it. Not until I saw her in that glass casket, smiling while her eyes remained shut did I finally believe it.

Twilight Sparkle... this world’s Twilight Sparkle was dead. I don’t know how long I cried or how long I held that glass casket, hoping to somehow fall in and embrace her. By the time I had my senses come back to me it was almost noon by the sight of the sun’s location in the sky.

While I stared at her cold corpse, I couldn’t help but think about my Twilight. The one in the world I lived in now. What if this was her fate as well? What if destiny ran the same in both worlds? Was Twilight Sparkle, the human one, doomed to one day end up in a casket just like her pony counterpart?

“This is wrong...” I muttered, lowering my head in shame. “I’ve done so much wrong and yet I’m still alive while a good pony like her is dead. I should be the one lying in there, not her. Not when she’s done so much and could have done so much for all of us.”

Celestia’s wings wrapped around me as I felt her nuzzle my neck. “Don’t say such a thing, Sunset. Twilight lived a good life, however short it was. She would have been proud to have seen you become a better pony then you were before.”

“I owe her everything... both of them,” I muttered as I placed a hoof on the glass, wishing I could hold her hoof one last time.

“You mean... you know of the Twilight in your world?” asked Celestia, with eager eyes. I guess I can’t blame her. If you apprentice and daughter figure lived in another world while the one you knew was dead before you, wouldn’t you want to know about them. “Are you two close?”

“We are... if it wasn’t for her... I wouldn’t be alive right now,” I muttered, wincing as I thought of the time I stood on that bridge.

Princess Celestia turned me around and looked me straight in the eye with both worry and desire. “What happened, Sunset? What did you almost do?”

I think she knew the answer, but she wanted to hear me deny it. I’m not proud of what I almost did. It still shames me to this day. But back then I felt like I had no choice. “Has... Twilight ever told you want the Elements of Harmony do to you when you're hit by them?” I asked, unsure if my mentor knew or not.

“No, I’ve asked Discord and Luna but they refuse to tell me. It’s like they almost don’t want me to know,” answered Celestia.

More like they don’t want to remember it.

“The Elements...they force you to feel the pain of all those you hurt over and over again. I felt all the tears, suffering, heartaches, and sorrows of those who I bullied and hurt all my life. Including you.” A tear dripped down my cheek as my mentor looked at me with horror. “When you're hit with it... there is no time. It’s like a second passes, but it feels like a thousand lifetimes. The more harm you’ve done, the worse it is. Imagine feeling all the pain you caused over and over again for dozens of lifetimes. When I felt that, when I finally realized what I had done in my quest for power... I broke.”

I sat on my haunches. “And that’s not the worse of it. The entire school hated me. They saw me for what I was and responded with hatred. On the best of days they ignored me or spoke behind my back... the worst days I had to go the nurse’s office.”

“But what about the five Twilight had befriended? Didn’t they help you?” asked Celestia.

“They tried, but I pushed them away. I felt unworthy to have any friendship, especially since I made it so that all five of them broke their own bond. I even tried to kill them once. How could I ask forgiveness after all that?” I muttered, remembering the cold and lonely days I had.

My clothes being stolen during Gym, my locker vandalized, my books ripped apart. The nicknames they came up with like “Sunset Satan”. I didn’t bother stopping it, because I wanted it. I wanted to be hurt. I wanted to feel the justice I had deserved for what I had done. I was a monster and I wanted to be taken down.

“Eventually, I figured... it would be best to just.... disappear forever. I thought no one would miss me. So I went to  the bridge leading to the city, ready... to jump...” My mentor’s response was a slap to the face. I looked at her while holding my red cheek as she looked at me with both fear, love, and tears. “Princess...”

“How... how could you think such a thing...? Did you ever stop to think that maybe I would miss you?!” She took me into her forelegs again and rested her head against mine. “Did you never once think that I missed you all those years you were gone? That I didn’t sit by that mirror day and night when it was open, hoping you would come back to me? Twilight wasn’t the only daughter figure I had in my life, you were one as well! I love you, Sunset Shimmer, no matter what! I lost one daughter, I don’t want to lose another!”

“I... I... I love you too, Celestia!” I shouted while sobbing into her chest. “I-It... It just hurt so much! I just wanted the pain to stop! I just wanted... I just wanted you...”

“I know... I know...” whispered Celestia as we continued to hold on to one another. It was as if nothing had changed. We were still teacher and student―no, mother and daughter.

I always feared that Twilight Sparkle had taken my place, but I was wrong. My mentor had a heart big enough for both of us and more. I felt the last of my worries and regrets leave me as I let out every grieving mistake I held within me. I only wished that Twilight was there, instead of being trapped in that casket for eternity..

Or maybe she was watching us. I’d like to think that maybe there is a god or something out there. Maybe it’s one of the human gods or maybe it’s Faust herself. I don’t know. But I like to think it was destiny that saved me that day.

“What stopped you?” asked Celestia.

I smiled for the first time since I came through the mirror. “She did... my Twilight.”

I looked up and gazed into my mentor’s curious eyes. “The Twilight of my world. She saw me and stopped me. We talked... and she told me she would help me. I was a stranger and yet she wanted to help me.”

I sighed as I thought about meeting the Twilight of my world, and how important she was to me now. “It was thanks to her that I managed to accept the other five’s friendship. From there, things slowly changed. I transferred schools to one in the big city and found other friends. Twilight and I grew really close and we became the best students in our class. We’re graduating now and heading into college to study science. She wants to change the world, just like this Twilight. And I’m going to make sure she does.”

I saw my mentor wipe a tear from her eye before smiling at me so bright that the sun couldn’t shine brighter than her. “It’s good to hear that. I really... really wanted to hear that.”

I smiled before turning back towards the Twilight who lay in eternal sleep. “She could have been so much more here.”

“She could have,” whispered Celestia. “I can’t be her, but I can do my best to see her dreams come true. In fact, she said that she got a lot of inspiration from the human world. She said that where you live, anyone is free to be who they are and aspire to what they are. Racism and prejudice, while existing, is fought against. And an entire world run by science and invention rather than magic. She says there are even those who choose their leaders for them to represent them in their governments.”

“Twilight wanted to create a democracy in Equestria?” I said with wide eyes. Such a thing was not even heard of in this world. Even I was surprised to learn that people had the power instead of kings or queens when I first went there.

“Yes, she called it that. I was not against it and neither was Luna. To have our ponies choose their own destiny without us, I saw it as a child finally growing up and walking their own path. But we all felt it would take a few hundred years to slowly change our central government.” Celestia sighed. “Unfortunately, I fear without Twilight I won’t be able to make these changes to such a path.”

A thought soon came to my head. It filled me up with hope as I began to consider the possibilities. “What if... what if I could get the knowledge? I live in the human world and the country I’m in is a democracy! I can learn all about it, gather books and data, and the next time the mirror opens I can bring it all to you. You and I... we can make Twilight’s dream a reality together!”

The realization on Celestia’s face was priceless as she looked at me like I had presented her a cake making spell. She smiled again and nodded. “That could work! This... this is a good idea, Sunset! I’ve been trying to figure out how I could make this vision of Twilight’s come true and now you’ve... you’ve given me a chance. Thank you so much.”

“It’s nothing. It’s the least I could do for her,” I muttered. For a long time, I had been trying to make up to Twilight what I had done and feared with her dead I would never get that chance. But now I can. I can make her dreams of a new and modern Equestria come to life.

This... this would be my redemption.

“I guess I should get to work right away when I get home, but first...” I rubbed my stomach and blushed as a gurgle came out of it. “I think I could use some lunch.”

“I hope you still like hayfries,” Celestia laughed as we left the grave site.

“I doubt I do. Once you try french fries you tend to ignore hay in favor of potatoes...”

The rest of the day I spent with my mentor, walking through Canterlot and seeing what had changed in my absence. I got to meet Princess Luna, who welcomed me with open hooves despite my past. They offered to let me visit Ponyville, to see Twilight’s friends who were doing well despite her passing, but I declined. I had to get back home. Back to my friends. Back to my Twilight.

And so I did, arriving back at my apartment in the city where I was greeted by a familiar puppy who licked my face when I came home. “Hi, Spike,” I said as I hugged him. I learned what had happened to the Spike of my old world and I couldn’t help but wish I could never let my Spike go. “Never run away, you hear me? Never!”

He barked and licked my face again before I let him go and he scampered off somewhere.

“Sunset, is that you?” Hearing her voice made me freeze up. Afterall, it was only a few hours ago that I saw her double’s body in a coffin that would last forever. I turned around and there she was. My Twilight. The living one. She smiled at me with that angelic smile of her’s that warmed my heart a long time ago. “How was your trip visiting your friends? I didn’t think you would be back so soon. You never mentioned where you were going also?”

Of course Twilight didn’t know. None of us at Canterlot High ever told anypony the truth. Sure, some rumor spread but nothing came out of it.

I walked up to my Twilight and placed a hand on her face. “You’re... alive...”

“Um, last time I checked, yeah?” chuckled Twilight. It was silence when I kissed her.

She was surprised at first, but then she kissed me back. My Twilight. My girlfriend. My lover. I still had her. I will always have her. I will never let her go.

Because she is my savior.

And I love her.

I stopped the kiss and closed my eyes. Feeling the taste of her lipstick on my lips. She looked at me with a raised eyebrow and gave a nervous smile. “Not that I’m complaining, but is something wrong?”

“No... I just... need to make a quick phone call... or five...” I muttered as I took out my cell and walked away, leaving Twilight confused.

I called Applejack first.

“Applejack... it’s me. Yeah, I went through like I said. Listen... there is something you, the girls, and Flash need to know...”