Look out, brahs! This is a Cutie Mark Crusader chapter over here! Just giving you a heads-up! Now we start off our story at Flare’s Pizza Parlor, and no we’re not starting off with watching TV because it’s not 3:00; it’s actually 1:20, so it’s quite crowded at this time, but over my busyness, Crystal had no trouble bothering me.
“And so I met this chick over at the library, she kept shushing me after I was speaking too loud. How rude was that?” Crystal complained to me.
“Uh huh.” I said as I was not really listening, just continuing cooking.
“She threatened to kick me out. I swear some ponies don’t know the meaning of ‘freedom of speech’.” Crystal said.
“If you say so.” I said.
“That wasn’t all though. There was nopony else in that library, so I didn’t know why the librarian was shushing me. She kept saying she needed to study some magic that Princess Celestia gave her.” Crystal said.
“Ok.” I said.
“So after I ruined her concentration for the last time, she used her magic to levitate me out of the library, sooo… yeah, rude.” Crystal said. Just then, the Cutie Mark Crusaders suddenly burst through the front door, carrying a bunch of fliers of some sort.
“Come to Scootaloo’s birthday party! Sugarcube Corner, tomorrow!” Apple Bloom said as she gave some invitations to some of the customers in my shop.
“Come to Scootaloo’s birthday party! We have cookies.” Sweetie Belle said as she did the same thing.
Also, Darth Vader was in the shop too carrying fliers, but once he overheard Sweetie Belle’s bragging about cookies. He got upset. “Way to steal our motto.” He complained as he threw his fliers in the trash and angrily walked out.
“Flare, Crystal!” Scootaloo said excitedly as she gave us some fliers. “Would you come to my birthday party tomorrow at Sugarcube Corner?”
“Scootaloo, you know I’m busy on Thursdays.” Crystal reminded her.
“No I don’t. What do you do?” Scoots asked.
“I sit at home all day and do nothing.” Crystal said.
“Well luckily, tomorrow is Friday, so you won’t have to worry about that.” Scoots said.
“Oh… so then I shouldn’t even be here.” Crystal said.
“Wow, you have a birthday party tomorrow, huh, Scoots?” I asked.
“It’s going to be so awesome! There’s going to be games, and food, and Rainbow Dash is even going to be there and perform a sonic rainboom for me!” Scoots explained.
“Wow! There’s going to be food?! Count me in, Scoots!” I said excitedly.
“Yeah me too! The last birthday party I went to was Psyche’s.” Crystal said.
A cutaway shows Pinkie and Crystal rolling a birthday cake out for Psyche. “Happy birthday, Psyche!” Pinkie said.
“Wow, Pinkie! Did you make this yourself?” Psyche asked as he observes the giant strawberry cake.
“Nope. Crystal helped me out!” Pinkie said.
“You’re going to be very surprised about what’s inside.” Crystal said.
“Shhh.” Pinkie shushed her.
“Awesome!” Psyche said.
Just then, a big fat slob of a pony pops out of the cake and grumpily says, “Happy birthday.” Everypony except Pinkie and Crystal was surprised but a little bit confused too. The slob looks over at the cake and says, “Oh hey, a cake.” He takes the cake and runs off.
“Say what now?” Psyche asked.
“SURPRISE!” Pinkie and Crystal yelled out. The cutaway ends.
“So what do you want for your birthday anyway?” I asked Scoots.
“Oh anything is fine, as long as it’s not socks.” Scoots said.
“But socks are so comfee.” I said as I show Scoots my thigh-high light blue socks.
“Give me something AWESOME! Something that everypony would say ‘awesome’ when they take a good look at it!” Scoots requested.
“Oh I know just what to get you!” Crystal said.
“Don’t ruin the surprise, Crystal! Show me tomorrow!” Scoots said.
“Got it!” Crystal agreed.
“Is there anything pacific that you want?” I asked….. no I am not explaining the ‘pacific’ thing again. I already explained it twice. Go back and read the story again.
“Well… I dunno. Anything awesome is fine. I don’t really care.” Scoots said.
“How would I know if you’d fine it awesome or not? What if I gave you a package of staples? Some ponies would find that awesome, but not all, but still some. Would you find it awesome?” I asked.
“Just give me something cool.” Scoots said.
“That still doesn’t answer my question.” I said.
Scoots sighs. “Ok, I’m thinking of something awesome, something flying, and something that defies gravity.”
“I’m guessing you want a pet that can fly.” Crystal assumed.
“Perhaps.” Scoots said. “But maybe it’s something that I’m in complete control of. I’m thinking of something fast, something…”
“Ferrous.” I said.
“Yeah, but that wasn’t really the word I was going to say next.” Scoots said.
“I know, but right after you said the word ‘fast’, I immediately thought of the word ‘ferrous’.” I said.
“I think you get the idea. Party starts at noon tomorrow at Sugarcube Corner. It would be really cool to see you both there.” Scoots said.
“I won’t let you down, Scoots. I’ll find you that possum grade awesome present you want, you’ll see!” I said.
“I can hardly wait!” Scoots said excitedly as she jumps up and hovers a bit for a few seconds and then touches back down. “See you tomorrow!” she runs off with her friends.
“So what are you going to get her, Flare?” Crystal asked.
“I-D-K.” I said. “I haven’t really thought of it yet. I’ve been so busy around here that I forgot tomorrow was Scootaloo’s birthday. I have to find her that awesome present she wants.”
“Well good luck with that! I already know what to get her. I’ll see you Scootaloo’s party.” Crystal said as she runs off.
“See ya, Crystal!” I said. “Hey, Bonnie, Lyra? Can you two do me a favor?”
“We have the shop covered, don’t worry.” Lyra said.
“You’re so smart, sista! I’ll be back just as soon as I find Scootaloo that birthday present she wants.” I said as I run off.
“To be honest, I sometimes like when he’s not here.” Bonnie admitted. “We get to do whatever we want when there are no customers.”
“Nah, we still need to follow the rules.” Lyra said.
“Who’s going to stop us?” Bonnie asked.
“This may be a test. Maybe he leaves all the time just to spy on us and see if we’re doing our jobs.” Lyra whispered to her.
“I doubt it.” Bonnie said.
“Why else do you think he leaves without locking his office?” Lyra asked.
“Because… he forgets?” Bonnie asked.
“YES BONNIE, YOU ARE RIGHT! WE SHOULD GET BACK TO WORK BECAUSE WE LOVE OUR JOBS SO MUCH!” Lyra yelled out. Bonnie sighs as they both return to work.
So I went outside to find Scootaloo a new gift, but what kind of gift would Scootaloo want? A video game? Nah, she’s not the gaming type. I read chapter 3 many times already, so I know. Does she want a new piece of awesome clothing? Nah, I’m afraid she’d look better than I, and I can’t have that. Just then, it hit me- WHOA! Dang, me the narrator says that, so why are objects just getting thrown at me in the story?! I’m not even talking out loud, I’m narrating this! Anyways, I saw a competition up ahead. Somepony looked like they were giving away a new scooter, and what more obvious gift to give Scootaloo than a brand new scooter?
“Step right up, everypony! Step right up!” the dealer cried out. “In just a few minutes, we’re going to be starting the contest to see who can place their hoof on this scooter the longest so they can take it home! Entry fee is only 5 bits! Come here while spots last, because ponies are already finding their spots!” I knew what I had to do. I have to win Scootaloo that scooter. That would be the perfect birthday present for her! It was already crowded over there, but I was able to squeeze myself in, and as it turns out, I wasn’t alone.
“Blaze? You wanna win this scooter too?” I asked him.
“It’s my birthday present to Scootaloo.” Blaze said.
“Say what now? No, no, no, this is MY birthday present to Scootaloo.” I corrected him.
“Then it appears we have reached an impasse.” Blaze said as he smirks at me.
“I believe so.” I said as I smirk back.
“Whoever leaves their hoof on here the longest we get to take it home.” Blaze said.
“Yeah, I got healthy hooves. I’ll be able to do this.” I said.
“I doubt it, man. I’m stronger than you.” Blaze said.
“What does strength have to do with this?” I asked.
“It has everythin’ to do with this.” Engie said.
“Engie? You want to give Scootaloo this scooter as well?” I asked.
“What? This old thing? Naw, she deserves better!” Engie said. “Ah was thinkin’ of upgradin’ it after ah win it. Make it a better model and upgrade it with thrusters and safety features. Things that will make this the best scooter Scootaloo has ever had.”
“Well we’ll see about that, Engie.” Blaze said mischievously to him.
“We will see.” Spike said.
“Spike? You too?” I asked.
“Yes, me too! I am going to win this scooter.” Spike said.
“For Scootaloo?” I asked.
“No, I already got Scootaloo something. I got her two tickets to a Wonderbolts show. I was thinking of bringing Rainbow Dash, but then I thought, I’m going nowhere with Rarity.” Spike said.
“So why are you getting this scooter?” Blaze asked.
“Since you three want it so much, I was going to win it and keep it for myself.” Spike said.
“That sounds stubborn.” Engie said.
“She has a fully-functional scooter already, so I want one too.” Spike said. “I mean, this here is the SX-300. It’s one of the fastest, most acrobatic and most stable scooters in Equestria.”
“Scoots would really want something like this.” I said.
“Alright everypony! Welcome to the SX-300 Hot Pocket scooter competition!” the dealer announced as his shirt pockets ignited, and then he spits on his shirt to take out the fire. “Who wants to win a scooter?!” Everypony in the crowd cheered. “Alright everypony! Hooves on the scooter! Whoever can hold it the longest will get to take it home! If you release your hoof, you are out! Let the holding begin!”
And so everypony placed their hooves (and Spike has right claw) on the scooter and the contest began. “DEELEEGH! ALRIGHT YOU KIDDIES! Let’s do this!” Blaze yelled in a deep voice.
“Don’t worry, brahs, we can win this! We can work together and win.” I said.
“Yeah, you’re right, Flare.” Spike nodded.
“Let’s shake on it.” I offered as I stuck out my other hoof, wanting a hoof shake from Spike, and Spike shakes my hoof with his right claw.
The buzzard goes off and the announcer yelled, “Sorry, dragon! You’re out!”
“What? No! I was just shaking his hoof!” Spike complained.
“Sorry, buddy. You are out!” the announcer said.
“Yeah, buddy, you are out!” Caramel said rudely to Spike as he clopped his hooves together. “Out you are, HA HA!”
The buzzard goes off again and the announcer yelled out to Caramel, “You are out!”
“Dang it!” Caramel whispered to himself as he walked away.
“So it’s just us, huh? Who wants to hear me sing some of the music of today?” Engie asked. Just then, Comet Tail and Amethyst Star release their hooves from the scooter and walk away as the buzzard sounds twice. “Ha ha! Works every time!” Engie said mischievously. Time went by, and after a couple of hours, there were no outs, until now that is. All there was left was me, Engie, Blaze, Cherry Berry, Medley, and Coco Crusoe.
“Pee-you! I haven’t had a shower in a week! I think I smell like a dumpster now!” Blaze said as a joke, but nopony left. “Wow you all are sick. You’re all very, very sick. I mean smell me! I smell like sewer water! Do you know what sewer water smells like? Have you ever been in a dirty bathroom? Well it’s a lot like that only 10x stinkier. Even stinkier than gas station bathrooms! Pee-you! Have you ever thought that’s possible? Try eating a gas station burrito off the gas station bathroom floor! How about eat a burrito in a gas station toilet!?” Cherry felt like she needed to barf so she ran off and the buzzard sounded. Blaze chuckled to himself.
“That is so disgusting, partner!” Engie complained.
“If you don’t like hearing it, let go of the scooter.” Blaze suggested.
“Wow, this really reminds me of the time Crystal, Spike, and I fought over one of Flare’s garlic rolls.” Engie said.
“That’s when I discovered Fluttershy wanted to be my mommy. I should really see her later. She’s so kind!” I said.
“Oh look over there!” Engie pointed. “There’s Fluttershy over there!”
“REALLY?!” I looked over but she wasn’t there.
“Ha ha! Mage’a look.” Engie teased.
“You’re a jerk, Engie. Also, you’re out.” I said.
“Wait, no ah’m-“ Engie looked down and he saw his hoof pointing to where I thought Fluttershy was but I guess karma saves the day. The buzzard sounds. “Aw c’mon!”
“Karma saves the day I guess.” I laughed.
“Ya actually believe in karma?” Engie asked.
“Yeah I believe in karma! I believe that karma is going to take care of things over at Mareami. It’s karma that brought me here in the first place, and it’s karma that’s going to give Scootaloo this amazing present and therefore, making me closer to being friends with everypony in town, just like Pinkie.” I explained.
“If you say so, man.” Blaze said.
“Yes I say so, ‘cause I’m smart!” I said. Time went by, hours and hours and hours, and hours turned into days, weeks, months, years, decades, centuries, and even 42 infinities went by, but then Coco and Medley got tired and decided to return home. “So it’s up to us, Blaze Goldheart! You ready?”
“Uhhh… I’ve been ready since the announcer said ‘go’.” Blaze reminded me.
“Yeah, sure, I find that to be pretty suspicious.” I said as I smirked at Blaze.
“What’s so suspicious about that?” Blaze asked.
“I dunno. I mean, you’re a draconian after all. Can it get freakier than that?” I asked.
“Hey! You know I hate it when ponies call me a freak!” Blaze yelled.
“Oh what you gonna do? Own me?” I asked as I say the word ‘own’ in a crazy accent. “If you let go of this scooter, you’re out, and I win.”
“Once this is over, you’re dead either way.” Blaze said.
“Yep, and you go to jail. Simple as that!” I said with a smile.
“Ugh!” Blaze groaned. Just then, I take out my phone with my hoof that’s not on the scooter and I send a picture to Blaze. Blaze’s phone starts vibrating.
“Hey Blaze, I sent you a funny.” I said.
“Really?” Blaze asked as he takes out his phone and reads it, and then the buzzard sounds. “GAAH!”
“And we have our winner!” the announcer said as he pointed to me.
“YES!” I cried out as I lifted my hooves in the air, but then my right hoof goes down. “I lost all feeling to this arm.”
“Not so fast!” Scootaloo said as she too was touching the scooter.
“Wait…. What?! How long have you been there?!” I yelled.
“Since the start of the competition.” Scoots said.
“How can we not see you?!” Blaze yelled.
“I’m small, and you two were looking at each other most of the time.” Scoots said. “Plus I know how to be quiet.”
“This was gonna be my birthday present for you!” I complained.
“Mine too!” Blaze yelled.
“It’s ok, guys. I really appreciate it.” Scoots said as she smiled at us.
“Oh… good.” Blaze said in relief.
“But now you two have to find me a new present!” Scoots said as she hops onto the scooter with her helmet on. “Because this my birthday to myself! Better luck next time!” Scootaloo then drives off with the scooter, leaving Blaze and I just standing there, shocked.
“Ok I DID NOT see that coming.” I said.
“Neither did I, bro. Neither did I.” Blaze said.
“Now I have to find a new present for Scootaloo! I sacrificed a lot of time for this!” I complained.
“I had to cancel my dentist appointment for this!” Blaze complained.
“Why are you complaining? Isn’t that good?” I asked.
“Oh… right, yeah it is.” Blaze said as he takes out his phone. “What is this picture you sent me anyway?”
“Oh it’s a picture of Keith’s butt.” I chuckled.
“Why do you have a picture of Keith’s butt on your phone?” Blaze asked.
“Hey, I don’t ask you how to live your life!” I yelled at him. Blaze sighs.
So I returned to my trailer, presentless, and still wondering what to get Scootaloo for her birthday. I went over to talk to my fish. Maybe they were able to help me. “Oh the crazy red guy who feeds us is here.” Yoyo said.
“Hey! Don’t be so rude, Yoyo!” Dorthey complained.
“Sorry. Oh yay! The crazy red guy that feeds us is here!” Yoyo said excitedly.
“Smooooooooth.” Dorthey said sarcastically.
“Hey fishies.” I said as I sat down on my office chair and rolled over to them.
“Hey pony!” Darrel said excitedly as he waved with his little fin. “Oh look at me! I’m doing what Dorthey does all the time!”
“What do you mean?” Piddles asked.
“My right fin is a little smaller than the average fin. It looks like I’m waving. Flare always thinks that.” Dorthey said.
“Makes you look like Nemo.” Rainbow teased.
“I dunno what to do, brahs. I mean, I found an awesome birthday present for Scootaloo, and I don’t even get to give her it.” I complained.
“Yeah, I know how that feels.” Pearl said.
“ONE TIME!” Rainbow yelled.
“One time what?” Yoyo asked.
“Oh c’mon, we all live in the same tank! How can you not know?” Rainbow reminded him.
“I mean, I wanna give Scootaloo the best birthday present ever, but I’m glad she’s happy with the present she got for herself. Myself never gives me anything for my birthday!” I complained.
“Oh well it stinks to be you. You deserve the present! How can you be so stubborn to you?” Darrel asked.
“Really, Darrel?” Rainbow asked.
“Yes. Really, Rainbow.” Darrel said. “HA! Really, Rainbow. That’s a silly combination.”
“C’mon, fishes, help a fella out! What can I give to Scoots for her birthday? I mean, I have no idea what I should give her!” I complained.
“I know what you can give me for my birthday. Get me a restraining order for that jerk over there!” Piddles points to his reflection. “STOP! JUST STOP REPEATING WHAT I DO- STOP IT! Is that fish a mime or something? Some strange magic? He’s so annoying!”
“Complaining about it won’t really help, Piddles.” Yoyo said.
“What are you pointing at Piddles?” I asked him.
“This jerk! Get him away!” Piddles yelled. I didn’t understand what he said, since he’s… you know… a fish. We don’t share the same vocal chords, so I assumed the direction he’s pointing is to my accordion that was hanging against the wall.
“Yes! YES! Piddles you are a genius!” I said excitedly.
“What did I do?” Piddles asked.
“I’ll play Scootaloo a song on my trusty accordion here!” I said as I pressed on some of the accordion keyboards to play a short melody. “Yes, this is perfect! I think I know just the song to sing her!”
“I don’t like the sound of that.” Rainbow said. “I’m more worried for Flare than a kid not tall enough to do something.”
A cutaway shows a kid walking up to sign that says, “You must be at least this tall to hit your head on this sign.”
“Awwww… I wish I was big.” The child complained. The cutaway ends.
Noon came the next day, so I went over to Sugarcube Corner to Scootaloo’s birthday party. Almost everypony I knew in Ponyville was there. I saw Fluttershy over there, and she looked like she was full of regret. “I’m sorry… I’m so sorry.” Fluttershy said sadly.
“Don’t worry, Fluttershy. I won’t tell.” Pinkie said as she comforted her.
“Wait, what are you two talking about?” I asked.
“Oh we’re just reenacting some comic full of feels.” Pinkie said.
“Is it the one where Fluttershy is actually Scoota-“ I asked but Fluttershy covered my mouth before I could finish.
“Shhhhh.” Fluttershy shushed me.
“Hey guys! What’s going on?” Scootaloo asked us.
“Oh… n-not much. I… I have to go do something.” Fluttershy said as she walked away.
“Check out this awesome present Aqua gave me!” Scootaloo said as she shows me a blue jacket of some sort. “This jacket feels so nice! It feels like I’m floating in the water or something, or flying in the rain.”
“HA! Flyin’ in the rain! Good one!” Engie laughed.
“Wow, Engie, even I wouldn’t be that harsh.” I said.
“I’m glad ya like it. Made it myself.” Aqua said to Scootaloo.
“It’s so awesome, Aqua. Thank you!” Scootaloo said as she gave Aqua a hug. Aqua felt a little bit awkward.
“Yeah… ya’re welcome, Scootaloo. Glad ya like it… umm… yeah.” Aqua said as Scoots continued to hug him. “Alright, I… I’m glad ya’re happy. Isn’t… isn’t there other presents ya want to open?”
“Right, right. Sorry.” Scootaloo said as she released Aqua from her grasp. I learned from that moment that Aqua’s not the hugging type, but for that matter, I first thought Scootaloo wasn’t the hugging type. “Where’s Rainbow Dash? I thought she would’ve been here by now.”
“I’m sure she’ll show up soon, but in the meantime, how about opening up my present?” Crystal suggested.
“Oh cool! This looks like such a big box! I bet whatever is inside is awesome!” Scoots said as she started opening up the box.
“You better believe it!” Crystal winked at her.
Right after Scootaloo opens the box, the box tilts over and Rainbow Dash drops out of it, gasping for breath. “Rainbow Dash?!” Scootaloo cried out in excitement.
“Surprise! Here’s that awesome gift you wanted!” Crystal said. “I know how much you love Rainbow Dash, so I decided to make her as your birthday present from me!”
“I couldn’t breathe in there! You never put in airholes in it!” Rainbow complained.
“Crystal, I…. this is the best gift I’ve ever had!” Rainbow cried out in excitement as she hugged Rainbow real tight.
“No, can’t breathe again!” Rainbow gasped out. Right after Scootaloo releases Rainbow, Rainbow passes out.
“Wow, I’m strong!” Scootaloo said. “I hope Rainbow Dash has enough energy for that sonic rainboom later!”
“Oh dear. I hope Rainbow Dash gets better soon.” Rarity said. “Just seeing her lie on the floor like that, it doesn’t suit the room.”
“Oh hey what’s that you’re carrying?” Scootaloo asked Rarity as she observes a gnome figurine she is carrying.
“Oh, this old thing? Oh this is my figurine that I won at the Foal and Filly Pageant 12 years ago. My mother and I competed in these pageants for many years, and… well… this is the only one we won.
“Is it because Granny Smith and ah beat ya all those years after that?” AppleJack asked as she smirked at Rarity.
“Hind-hoof archery! Who could beat that?!” Rarity yelled.
“It takes a true Apple to know how to use these babies.” AppleJack said as she bucked the air. “Of course neither of us were able to compete anymore after we turned 18.”
“Alas, it’s true. Only a filly and a mare can compete in this pageant, but then again, that pageant was… silly… I am lucky to have this figurine.” Rarity said.
“Yeah and we’re lucky to have 9!” AppleJack teased Rarity.
“So Scoots, are you ready for my birthday present for you?” I asked.
“Well since I tricked you out of the scooter, I didn’t think you’d be able to get me one on time.” Scoots said.
“Well I’d like to thank my albino catfish, Piddles, for helping me out with this idea.” I said as I took out my accordion.
“Oh you’re giving me an accordion? I… ok… I’ve been taught worse instruments… banjo for one.” Scoots said.
“Oh no, this is my accordion. I have a song to sing to you.” I said.
“Oh yeah? What are you going to sing?” Scootaloo asked.
“Allow to me to demonstrate.” I said as I started dancing around and playing my accordion and began to sing, “Happy birthday! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday! Happy birthday to you! Well, it’s time to celebrate your birthday, it happens every year – we’ll eat a lot of broccoli and drink a lota root beer! You should be good and happy that there’s something you can eat – a million ponies every day are starving in the street!”
“What?!” Scootaloo cried out.
“Your daddy’s in the gutter with the wretched and the poor. Your mama’s in the kitchen with a can of Cycle Four. There’s garbage in the water, there’s poison in the sky, I guess it won’t be long till we’re all gonna die! Happy birthday! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday! Happy birthday to you!”
“Bro, this is song is completely unnecessary.” Blaze said as I was singing my chorus.
“Where did you get this garbage anyway?” Psyche asked.
“Was that supposed to be a pun?” Blaze asked him.
“Well, what’s the matter little friend, you think this party is the pits?” I sang to a concerned Scootaloo. “Enjoy it while you can, we’ll soon be blow to bits!” an explosion sounds in the background. “The monkeys in the royal guard are gonna cook our goose – their hooves’ on the button, all they need is an excuse! It doesn’t take a military genius to see – we’ll all be fat and exhausted after World Party 3! There’s nowhere you can run to, nowhere you can hide – when they cook the big one, well all eat fried!” I stopped singing for a moment and then asked the kids at the party, “Come on boys and girls, sing along, ok?”
And so they did, despite my bad influence, “Happy birthday! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday! Happy birthday to you… WOW!” I then played an accordion solo as I started screaming and making disastrous sound effects with my mouth, and most of the kids, Pinkie, Engie, and Crystal started dancing, but everypony else felt a bit disturbed.
“How are they enjoying this?!” Psyche yelled.
“The world has become pretty weird these days, mate.” Aqua nodded. “Eeyup. The world has become pretty weird these days.
“Well there’s a punk in the alley and he’s lookin’ for a fight.” I continued. “There’s a hobo on the corner stealing everything in sight! There’s a mother in the ghetto with another mouth to feed – seems that everywhere you look today there are misery and greed! I guess you know the planet is gonna burn up like the sun, but that’s no reason why we shouldn’t have a little fun! So if you think it’s crazy, if there’s more than you can take – just blow out the candles and have a piece of cake- HEY!”
Everypony in the room decided to join along because as it turns out, I was just speaking a moral. “Happy birthday! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday! Happy birthday to you- WOW! Happy birthday! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday! Happy birthday to you!” Then everypony shouted “HAPPY BIRTHDAY!” as Crystal was beating on the counter to create a little rhythm.
“AND A PINCH TO GROW AN INCH!” I shouted as I tripped on Scootaloo’s new scooter which made it activate and zoom across the room (oh little to me, I sound like Dr. Seuss). The scooter then was about to crash right into Rarity, but luckily Blaze shows up and pushes her out of the way before the scooter lands perfectly safe and unharmed.
“Wow that scooter really is accurate! Awesome!” Scootaloo said excitedly.
“Oh… snap.” Crystal said.
“I apologize deeply for that! Why was that scooter right in the middle of the floor like that?” I asked.
“It was leaned towards the wall, bro!” Blaze corrected me.
“Oh dear!” Rarity freaked out.
“It’s ok, Rarity. You’re alright. No need to thank me.” Blaze said.
“My gnome figurine! It’s… it’s ruined! Shattered into a million pieces!” Rarity started tearing up as she walked over to her shattered figurine.
“Rarity, I apologize deeply! I somewhat have the feeling that was my fault.” I said.
“Uhh, you think?” Psyche asked sarcastically.
“Psyche, shut up. Being a jerk won’t help.” I advised him.
“Ah’m sure AppleJack will give ya her’s, Rarity. Ah mean, she has 9. She won’t miss one.” Apple Bloom offered.
“Yeah ah agree.” AppleJack nodded.
“I don’t want YOUR figurines, AppleJack! I won this one fair and square, and now it’s ruined!” Rarity cried.
“Sheesh, Rarity. You’re such a drama queen! It’s only a figurine!” Sweetie Belle said.
“NO! You have no idea what it’s like to be so attached to something you earned and worked so hard for!” Rarity cried as she picked up the pieces of her shattered figurine with her magic and ran off.
“Well that was a little overdramatic.” Sweetie Belle said.
“Hey ah tried.” Apple Bloom said.
“Just as I thought this party was awesome, somepony had to cry and run off.” Scootaloo complained. Well, once again, I screwed things up, but at least not completely. At least I wasn’t the one that made Rainbow Dash suffocate in a box. I knew something had to be done. Once the party was over, I went over to the cider bar with the Noble Six.
“So I was doing some research on-“ Psyche started, but then Aqua interrupts.
“Pardon me, Psyche, but Engie, is that brown sugar on that table?” Aqua asked as he points to the booth next to us.
Engie looks and he said, “Yes it is, but ya know, here’s a thought; while white sugar comes in a number of different granulated sizes, white sugar is the most common of all sugars. When ya heat white sugar, it browns to almost a toffee-color and it has a similar flavor.” He explained.
“Umm, yeah, I was asking about the brown sugar.” Aqua corrected him.
“Yes ah was just about to get to that.” Engie continued. “Now brown sugar normally comes in different colors from light to dark brown. Brown sugar was originally white sugar before all the molasses was taken out. Often though, brown sugar is white sugar where the molasses has been added into the mix. If the sugar is darker, then it has more molasses on it.”
Aqua looks at Engie awkwardly and said, “No it’s ok, I can get it myself.” he gets up to get the sugar, but on the way he said to Engie, “By the way, I studied biology. I know how sugar works.”
“Anyways, as I was saying, I was doing a little research on Rarity’s prized figurine that broke…” Psyche continued by interrupted.
“Oh stop pointing hooves! I didn’t mean it!” I complained.
“I… I wasn’t blaming anypony.” Psyche said. “I was just saying-“
“I don’t wanna hear this anymore. It was an accident!” I complained.
“Ok whatever.” Psyche said. “Anyways, the figurine that Rarity had with her in the party, I was looking over the company that sponsors the Foal ‘n Filly Pageant, and it turns out, it’s sponsored by a small garden shop, goes by the name of Daisy, Rose, ‘n Lily Valley.”
“I knew it wasn’t a coincidence that we see those three together all the time.” Crystal said.
“Anyways, I went over to their shop today and I asked to speak to their manager, which, at the same time was their cashier and head gardener.” Psyche said.
“And which of three is that?” Blaze asked.
“I spoke with Daisy, but it turns out, all three of them owned the place, and they were all ‘head-gardener’, and manager and all that.” Psyche explained. “So I asked Daisy if we could buy one to replace the one Rarity lost, but she said it wasn’t for sale. In order to get one, a mare and a filly have to enter the next pageant that starts in two days.”
“That’s a good idea, brah! I should disguise myself as a filly, and you and I can go there and compete!” I said.
“What about me? Do I get a disguise?” Psyche asked.
“You already look like a mare so it doesn’t matter. Actually so does Blaze. You two should compete.” I suggested.
Blaze and Psyche looked at eachother, and then Blaze said, “Neither of us look like fillies though.”
“How about Rarity can go get the figurine herself?” Aqua suggested.
“She’s too old, no offense to her.” Engie said.
“No, I mean, her and Sweetie Belle can enter the pageant and win one, and I’m going to help them win!” I said.
“Good call, partner! Countin’ it was yer fault after all, so it’s only fair.” Engie said.
I gave him a glare. “Yeah… thanks. Engie sometimes you’re a jerk, like when ponies abuse your offerings.”
A cutaway shows a pony wearing a hat walking down the street towards a pony wearing a shoe on his head. “Hey buddy, why do you have a shoe on your head?” the hat pony asked.
“Because I can’t find my hat.” The shoe pony said.
“Well, it’s a good thing I have two!” the hat pony said as he takes off his hat, revealing the same exact hat underneath it. Just then, the shoe pony takes both hats and places it on his hooves.
“Thank you, sir!” the shoe pony said. The cutaway ends.
So I went over to the Cutie Mark Crusader treehouse so I can speak with them. You know… I said this was a Cutie Mark Crusader chapter, but only Scootaloo had a lot of dialogue, and my friends had more appearances than them, so I’m not sure why I called it a CMC chapter. Over at treehouse, before I went inside, the CMCs were playing with some of Scootaloo’s presents.
“I really like this jacket Aqua gave you, Scootaloo!” Sweetie Belle said as she rubs her jacket on her face.
“You like it a little too much. You used it more than I.” Scootaloo said as she snatches the jacket from her.
Just then, I started doing the Sheldon Cooper knock on the treehouse door. Knock, knock, knock; “Apple Bloom?” Knock, knock, knock; “Sweetie Belle?” Knock, knock, knock….. “Ummm… did I say Apple Bloom already?”
“Come in, Flare!” Apple Bloom called out, and so I came inside and took a seat.
“Thanks, girls! Good to see you!” I said.
“What brings ya here?” Apple Bloom asked.
“Well first off, let me ask, have you ever seen Bambi or Lion King?” I asked.
“I have.” Sweetie Belle raised her hoof and said.
“Ok I just wanted to make sure Apple Bloom didn’t.” I said.
“Why not?” Apple Bloom asked.
“Tragedy. I don’t wanna mention it. Anyways, mainly I’m here to talk to Sweetie Belle.” I said.
“What’s on your mind, Flare?” Sweetie Belle asked.
“A tumor, but that’s not part of this conversation.” I said. “Now in Scootaloo’s birthday party, I accidently started up Scootaloo’s new scooter and by doing so, broke Rarity’s prized figurine.”
“UGH! Did she set you up to this?!” Sweetie Belle complained.
“NO! This is all me. I feel bad that I caused Rarity’s gnome to shatter and I want to make it up to her.” I said.
“Why?” Sweetie Belle asked.
“Because it’s the right thing to do, plus it’s a gnome. IT’S A GNOME, SWEETIE BELLE! Gnomes are the coolest type of fairytale midgets!” I yelled.
“Fairytale little people.” Apple Bloom corrected me.
“Oh c’mon, Apple Bloom. There are no midgets here to get offended!” Scootaloo reminded her.
“Actually, I’m not really Apple Bloom.” Apple Bloom said in a high-pitched male voice. “I’m only covering for her on her bathroom break. I’m not really a filly either. I’m a little pony. So you just offended me, ma’am.”
Just then, the real Apple Bloom comes in. “Thanks for coverin’ for me, Charles.” Apple Bloom said to her duplicate.
“Yeah next time, read my contract carefully. I do NOT like it when ponies say… THAT WORD… in front of me.” Charles complained as he grumpily walked out.
“If he were one of the seven dwarves, he’d be Grumpy. LAWL!” I teased. Just then, an empty cider bottle gets thrown at me. “OW!”
“I HEARD THAT YOU DONKEY!” Charles yelled out in anger.
“I’LL SUE YOU FOR ASSAULT!” I yelled out at him. I then turned back to the crusaders and smiled, “So anyways, I want to help Rarity in getting her a new figurine by competing in this year’s Foal ‘n Filly pageant.”
“So why did you come to us?” Scootaloo asked.
“He wants me to compete with Rarity.” Sweetie Belle said.
“Wow… that’s pretty psychic of you, Sweets.” I nodded.
“I am not going to compete in a stupid pageant just so Rarity can have a new figurine all to herself!” Sweetie Belle yelled.
“I know it’s tough, but it’s the only one she ever won and AppleJack has… nine! Rarity is going to really feel jealous of her.” I said.
“No kidding! Every day I keep hearing Rarity complain about that stupid toy!” Sweetie Belle complained. She then mocks Rarity’s voice and said, “Oh, woe is me! Flare Gun ruined my figurine, my only figurine! Why not AppleJack’s! Why did I have to bring the figurine to Scootaloo’s party after I took it for polishing? This world is so cruel! Maybe I should just lay on my bed and die! Oh woo-hoo-hoooooo!”
“Wow… just… wow.” I said. “I mean I seen Rarity complain a lot, but I never see her get so overdramatic she’d threaten to kill herself.”
“Yeah Rarity’s pretty stubborn.” Sweetie Belle said.
“I know how it feels to have a stubborn sister.” I nodded. “One day, back at Mareami, my sister Water was playing dollhouse. I wanted to play along too. I mean don’t all sisters want their brothers to play with them? So Water agreed, since we were both lonely and had no friends, we mostly had each other. But Water wanted to be in charge of everything. She says she wants to be all the family members except the dog. DOG! Dog out all of her dolls! I mean, I don’t even like dogs! She wouldn’t even let me be the pet parakeet! I wanted to mock her so bad because of it!”
“Parrots mock, not parakeets.” Apple Bloom corrected me.
“Oh it doesn’t matter! It’s all imaginary. Maybe I could’ve been that that Scottish talking dog if I wanted to and I’d spend my night time hours as a dog who runs a protection racket for the 24-hour pharmacies.” I explained. “But no, it’s all Water’s imagination!”
“Wow.” Sweetie Belle said. “Is she your older sister or younger sister?”
“Older. It’s pretty sad since I’m smarter than her. She can’t always take care of herself. She needs me. I dunno why she decided to go out and tour all of Equestria all by herself.” I said.
“Wow… that’s… pretty sad.” Sweetie Belle said.
“I mean she does call me often. Not as often as my mom though, but still. I’m so worried about her. Back then she was the closest thing I had to a friend. Sigh… what am I gonna do?” I asked sadly.
“You know what, Flare? You persuaded me enough. I’ll do the pageant with Rarity and help her win that stupid figurine.” Sweetie Belle said.
“Oh… I wasn’t even trying to persuade you.” I said.
“TOO LATE! WE’RE GOING TO HELP RARITY! NOW LET’S GO!” Sweetie Belle yelled as she starts pushing me out, and she shuts the door behind her and we both started heading over to see Rarity.
“Hey Apple Bloom, aren’t you and AppleJack going to enter the contest too?” Scootaloo asked.
“Eeyup.” Apple Bloom said.
“Why didn’t you say anything?” Scootaloo asked.
“Didn’t give me a chance to. They both rushed out.” Apple Bloom said.
“Boy, are they in for a big surprise.” Scootaloo said.
Over at Carousel Boutique, Rarity was making a dress, but at the same time grieving over the lost of her figure. Yeah, that’s right, she became fat. Ha, kidding! You think I’d pull the .MOV virus on her? As if! So Sweetie Belle and I came inside the boutique and surprised Rarity. “Whoa, Flare, Sweetie Belle! You surprised me!” Rarity said.
“Go on Flare, ask her!” Sweetie Belle demanded.
“Ok. Rarity, why are you making a black cloak?” I asked.
“What? I always make black cloaks when I’m depressed.” Rarity said.
“Why?” I asked.
“It’s a habit.” Rarity said.
“C’mon Flare, ask her the real question!” Sweetie Belle instructed me.
“You think she’s going to know how the world was created? How the universe was created? Those are theories that are never going to be answered!” I pointed out.
“Oh for the love of- Flare wants us to enter the next Foal ‘n Filly Pageant.” Sweetie Belle said.
“Oh right, I forgot about that.” I said.
“Well… that’s… I never thought you’d be interested Sweetie Belle.” Rarity said.
“Really?” Sweetie Belle asked.
“You always complain how pageants are ‘boring’ and ‘unnecessary’” Rarity said.
“No I said getting pregnant is boring and unnecessary. Why not adopt a child? Save the fuss.” Sweetie Belle corrected her.
“So you don’t mind competing for the pageant?” Rarity asked.
“No way, sis! I totally want to compete in the pageant!” Sweetie Belle said.
“Well… I guess we should sign up for it.” Rarity said.
“I guess we should.” Sweetie Belle agreed.
“But we’ll need practice.” Rarity said.
“A lot of practice.” Sweetie Belle added.
“Too right. Let’s go.” Rarity said as her and her sister walk out of her shop to go sign up for the pageant. I must say, that went a little easier than I expected. I have the feeling Rarity is going to win that figurine again yet. One way or another, my work here was done so I left for home for the night.
The next day came and I was on my way to work, when… well… I was stopped by Rarity. “Flare, darling! Good morning!”
“Morning, sista!” I said.
“I could never get used to your silly slangs, but I do think you are a dear friend.” Rarity said.
“Kind of an awkward way to start a conversation. What’s the catch here, Rare?” I asked.
“Well… Sweetie Belle and I… we were… we were hoping you were not too busy.” Rarity said. So Rarity invited me to her house and she made me some tea. We, along with Sweetie Belle, sat down in her lounge so they can speak with me.
“Hmm! This tea tastes good Rarity. Counting with your British accent, I wouldn’t be surprised.” I said.
“French accent actually.” Rarity corrected me.
“Didn’t I say that? I dunno, they all sound alike to me. I mean we have the fancy voices, the dorky voices, the angry voices, the other angry voices, the angry and drunk voices, the super crazy hoof sticking out type voices, the other fancy voices that sound south of the border, and the rest sound Russian.” I explained.
“Uh huh.” Rarity nodded not knowing a word I said. “Anyways we have a little… proposition for you.”
“I’m listening.” I said as I took another sip of the tea.
“As you can see, we just found out a little while ago that AppleJack is competing in the contest with Apple Bloom, and if they compete using the type of talents they have, we don’t stand a chance.” Rarity explained. “The Apples and their hind-hoof archery talents, it’s not easy to beat.”
“So where you getting at?” I asked.
“Rarity and I were doing some research to see if we can find another talent that can beat their archery.” Sweetie Belle said.
“You know what’s funny, Sweetie Belle? When I was your age, I didn’t know what the words ‘research’ and ‘archery’ meant.” I said.
“You were a pretty special kid, huh?” Sweetie Belle asked.
“Yeah kinda, but it’s all a thing in the past. At least I was nice, but the only downside was I was never interested in Pokemon. I kinda regretted that.” I said.
“So as we were researching some talents, I found a little something that our family has been good at for many generations.” Rarity said.
“I bet it’s something fashion related.” I assumed.
“Nope, but I must admit that was my first guess.” Sweetie Belle said. As it turned out, Rarity’s ancestors were good at…. Umm…. dang I’m a little nervous….. knife throwing. Rarity’s family was really good at it. I knew Rarity had really good eye-sight and aim, which is what made her a great tailor. I’d be pretty excited to see that if I wasn’t the one being the guinea pig. Rarity chained my hooves on each side of the wheel, and Sweetie Belle took out some knives.
“Kay kay, mind if I ask… why am I the guinea pig?” I asked.
“You’re pretty tall, dear. It’ll be perfect for our act.” Rarity said.
“Are you sure you want to do this? There are risks.” I said.
“What kind of risks?” Rarity asked.
“Well… not much… nothing lethal… except for maybe stab wounds on my legs or shoulders, maybe you’d get me in the eyes and I’d be blind, get me in the mouth and I’ll have a real bad time at the dentist, get me in the chest area, I’m very sensitive around the belly button area. Not to mention… I COULD DIE!” I explained.
“Flare, none of you may know it, but actually, I’ve been throwing objects without missing all my life. It’s what my mother and I did when we used to compete in the pageant. Until AppleJack’s archery got in the way and bested us.” Rarity explained.
“But you said AppleJack and Apple Bloom are competing in this pageant. Why do the same thing again when you have a great chance of being beaten again?” I asked.
“Have you seen Apple Bloom’s apple bucking?” Sweetie Belle snorted and chuckled. “She has no chance!”
I wouldn’t be so sure of that, because a cutaway shows me at Sweet Apple Acres, tied up to a target and AppleJack was about to shoot in my direction with a bow and arrow, using her hind-hooves. “Watch ‘n learn, Apple Bloom!” she said as she shoots the arrow at my direction but the arrow hits right underneath my arm.
“AAAH NO!” I cried out. I was never so scared in my life.
“Wow! This is amazin’, AppleJack!” Apple Bloom said excitedly.
“Sure has, younglin’! Been a special family talent for generations to come!” Granny Smith said. “And now for more generations to come!”
“Exactly! So why don’t you give it a shot, Apple Bloom?” AppleJack asked.
“Do I have a say in this?” I asked in a frightened tone.
“Ah’m sorry, sugarcube. Did ya say something? FIRE!” AppleJack yelled as Apple Bloom shot the arrow right at me but the arrow lands right between my legs.
“HOLY WIZARD OF FEELINGS! I ALMOST PEED!” I cried out.
“Ah feel bad for that arrow then.” Granny Smith teased and chuckled.
“YOU APPLES ARE SO HARSH! IF I HAD PANTS RIGHT NOW, I’D POOP IN THEM!” I yelled. The cutaway ends, although I wish that cutaway didn’t end because right now, Rarity is starting to throw knives at me.
“Hold still, dear.” Rarity instructed me.
“I think I need to use the lavatory first.” I said in a frightened tone. But I was too late; she already started throwing the knives at me. “AAH FLIPPY!” I yelled as she threw one knife at me. “VOLLEYBALLS!” I cried as another knife gets thrown at me. “NOT THE FACE!” I yelled during the third knife throw. “How about you don’t?” I asked calmly during the fourth throw. I must say, I’m pretty impressed, even though she cut the knives pretty close to my skin (no pun intended), and she even threw a knife right through my hair! “FUDGE!” I cried out.
“Sorry to scare you, dear.” Rarity said.
“Hey I’m the one who broke your figurine; I must help you get it back. It’s my friendship duty.” I said.
“And I am very proud of your improvement, Flare. By the looks of things now, you probably can be friends with pretty much anypony you want!” Rarity said as she threw another knife near my ear.
“AAAH! It wouldn’t hurt to tell me when you’re throwing them!” I suggested.
“Aww but that would ruin the fun.” Rarity said as she used her magic to remove all the knives from the wheel with her magic and set them aside. “Ok, Sweetie! You’re turn!”
“Umm…” Sweetie Belle thought.
“Something wrong, dear?” Rarity asked.
“I don’t know about this. I mean, I don’t have as good of eye sight as you. What makes you think I’ll be able to do this?” Sweetie Belle asked.
Every generation of our family was born with the gift, Sweetie Belle! You just have to feel it within you!” Rarity explained. “Here, how about this? I’ll give you some plastic knives to start off with.” Rarity uses her magic to give Sweetie Belle some fake knives. I wasn’t really afraid of these knives, since they can’t really hurt me, so I had a moment of peace. “But…” Rarity added as she turned my wheel upside down and now I was hanging upside down.
“Can’t catch a break can I?” I complained.
“Ready, Sweetie?” Rarity asked.
“No.” Sweetie Belle said.
“GO!” Rarity yelled. So Sweetie Belle started throwing the fake knives at me, but she was doing a poor job at it, because she was either not throwing hard enough, or she keeps hitting me. “C’mon Sweetie, you can do better that! You were born with the gift too! C’mon, Sweetie! PUSH IT!”
“Maybe she’s not born with the gift. Maybe it’ll be best to try something new.” I suggested.
“Perhaps he’s right.” Sweetie Belle agreed.
“Oh no he isn’t.” Rarity said as she used her magic to give Sweetie Belle the real knives. “Now… real knives, real pony, try not to miss.”
“I DON’T WANNA DO THIS ANYMORE!” I yelled. “I know I said I’d die for my friends, but this is ridiculous!”
“Don’t worry about him, dear. Just throw the knives at the target, and you’ll do fine! We’ll win the pageant for sure!” Rarity explained. Sweetie Belle just stood there nervously because I knew she didn’t want to hurt me, or maybe she was just too afraid to be like her sister and not really worry about how my life is at stake right now. “Why are you just sitting there looking at him?” Rarity asked her.
“It’s because I’m handsome, also I’m in danger, and I really don’t wanna pee right now, counting I’m upside down!” I said nervously.
“Go on, Sweetie Belle! Do it! I need that figurine!” Rarity demanded. “Go on, Sweetie Belle! Do it! GO! DO IT! DO IT NOW!” Sweetie Belle started to really stressed out of her sisters demands, so her anger got the best of her and she started throwing the knives at me, but fortunately for me, she missed me every time.
“GAAAAH!” I yelled during her throwing. “KA-BADDA! NUUUUUU! NOT IN THE NARDS!”
“Oh my goodness, Sweetie Belle!” Rarity said shockingly. “You ARE born with the gift!” Rarity started hugging her sister.
“I guess I am.” Sweetie Belle said.
“Yeah I don’t wanna ruin this touching moment, but I’m feeling really dizzy right now, all the blood is going into my head, and I am so glad I am the master of my own bladder!” I said. So they released me and I left. I actually ran out of there as fast as I could, and I went straight home. Didn’t even bother going into work that day since I was so scared! To make things worse though, they asked me to help them out tomorrow at the pageant… BUT WAIT… THERE’S MORE! Apple Bloom and AppleJack needed my help as well for their part in the pageant! I couldn’t just say no because Apple Bloom begged me to help. She says she’s really comfortable throwing arrows at me, she doesn’t really trust anypony else for that, and well… I’m not immune to puppy dog eyes on little ponies. Plus AppleJack said she’d pay me a lot of money for this, and I need that expansion of my shop paid off. Tomorrow’s gonna be a rough day for me.
Tomorrow finally came, and I was on my way to the pageant. I didn’t want to be there alone so my friends from the Noble Six, as well as Fluttershy came to support me, but at the same time support Rarity and AppleJack too, but seeing Fluttershy there in the audience made me feel a lot better. Now I never been to a beauty pageant before, and I gotta say, they put on quite a show! I even got to see a minor town celebrity!
“Fillies and gentlecolts! Welcome to the 46th annual Foal ‘n Filly Beauty Pageant!” the announcer announced. “Here’s your MC for this afternoon, you know him as a student who wants to get with a teacher, please stomp your hooves for WoodenToaster!” the announcer turned out to be her in the shadows and she started singing one of his best known songs: Beyond her Garden! I got to see her sing from back stage as I was getting ready for my parts in the show.
“Howdy Flare! Ya ready?” AppleJack asked me.
“Huh? Oh sure… yeah… that.” I stuttered.
“Flare, darling! You ready for our part?” Rarity asked.
“Wait you’re helpin’ her out?” AppleJack asked.
“’Her’ has a name.” Rarity reminded her.
“Whatever, it doesn’t matter. Ah just hope you’re ready.” AppleJack said.
“Also, I got you this jumpsuit to wear.” Rarity said as she gives me a purple and yellow-striped jumpsuit. “Yeah, purple’s not really my color. I’m not Psyche.”
“Doesn’t really matter, dear. I just don’t want to see your precious vest get all ruined.” Rarity said as she pinches my vest.
“HEY! No touchy the vest!” I instructed her.
After Rarity and AppleJack went back to their dressing room to get ready, Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle saw the worried look on your face. “Flare, are ya alright?” Apple Bloom asked.
“Of course I am. Just… have post-mature caterpillars in my tummy.” I said.
“You really don’t want to do this, do you?” Sweetie Belle asked.
“To be honest… no I don’t, but I owe Rarity her figurine, and that’s what I’m going to do.” I said.
“No, Flare, you don’t.” Sweetie Belle said. “It’s very kind of you to risk your life to pay a debt, but if you really don’t feel like doing this, you don’t have to.”
“Yeah. Ah still don’t understand why ya offered to help us though.” Apple Bloom said. “Also… to be honest, ah don’t care for winnin’. Ah don’t care about beauty pageants. AppleJack’s only here to show off her stunts and advertise Sweet Apple Acres. Neither of us care ‘bout the way we look.”
“I do! I’d totally do this beauty pageant, but not when my friends are terrified for their lives.” Sweetie Belle said. She then faced me with a sad look and said, “Flare, go home. You paid enough debt for Rarity. We’ll take it from here.”
“Are you sure? I mean, without me, what are you going to do for your stunts?” I asked.
“We’ll find a way, but ah don’t want ya to feel terrified.” Apple Bloom said.
“You’re a good friend, Flare. Just remember that.” Sweetie Belle said. I’m not sure if she was actually saying that or just persuading me to go on, but one way or another, I really didn’t want to go on, but both Rarity and AppleJack promised me a lot of money. I’ll need that money for my expansion. I’m not really sure what I should do.
“I have to do this.” I said.
“No you don’t. You don’t want to, we know you don’t.” Sweetie Belle said.
“Please don’t do this, Flare.” Apple Bloom begged.
“But what about your stunts?” I asked. Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle looked at each other and nodded.
“It seems Sweetie Belle and ah have come to an agreement.” Apple Bloom said. The two of them went off to see their sisters. I wasn’t sure what they were going to do, but I sure did enjoy the pageant and what talents they had in stock. Golden Harvest and Dinky showed off their cooking skills to everypony, Berry Pinch and Berry Punch showed off their skills on a unicycle, and even Trixie was in it with her niece doing magic tricks.
“And now, please put your hooves together for Rarity and Sweetie Belle in…. wait a minute.” WoodenToaster stopped. “I am terribly sorry folks, as it turns out Sweetie Belle and Rarity will not be participating in this pageant any longer, and neither is AppleJack and Apple Bloom, so it seems it is time for the judges to pick their favorites. Now hurry it up and let’s get this done, I don’t want the bears to find me.”
“Wait what? Rarity and AppleJack aren’t going to participate?” I asked.
“It’s true.” AppleJack said.
“Flare we’re sorry for making you become our target practice. I was just so desperate for the figurine; I didn’t bother seeing how afraid you were.” Rarity said.
“I wasn’t afraid.” I lied. “Fine, my narrator is such a tattle tale. I was afraid.”
“We know; that’s why we wanted to cancel it.” Rarity said.
“But what about the contest? What about your figurine?” I asked Rarity. “I did this so you can win a figurine. I broke it. I owe you one.”
“AppleJack will give me one of hers, not to worry.” Rarity said as she sticks out her hoof, wanting me to shake it. Same goes for AppleJack.
“We’ll be sure to tell Twilight about yer efforts.” AppleJack said. I must say, I expected there to be a bit more in this pageant, but it seems my friends and I all learned a lesson. I owe Princess Luna a letter about what I discovered.
“And the winner of this year’s Foal ‘n Filly pageant goes to…” WoodenToaster started as she read the flier the judges gave her. “Rainbow Dash and Scootaloo for their sonic rainboom!”
“Awesome!” Scootaloo and Rainbow Dash both cried out in excitement as they went up on stage to claim their figurine.
“I know I pretty much did most of the work, but it sure means a lot that you have my back, squirt!” Rainbow said to Scoots.
“It was amazing!” Scoots said in excitement.
“By the way, WoodenToaster, love your music! Except for the Rainbow Factory one. I never liked that story.” Rainbow Dash said to her.
“Well, gotta dash!” Scoots said as she jumps on her new scooter and rides out of the building, and right after, some bears came inside.
“WOODENTOASTER!” one of the bears yelled.
“Oh… crud.” WoodenToaster said in freight.
“YOU LAUGHED AT US, AND YOU WILL PAY!” the bear yelled out in anger.
“Let this be a lesson to you, folks. NEVER laugh at bears.” WoodenToaster said to the audience. Well, I hope you all liked this chapter! It was multiple stories in one. Special thanks to WoodenToaster for guest starring on my story! Her music is good! Go check her out on her YouTube channel! Also, AppleJack and Rarity gave me my payment for helping them out; not as much as they promised since I didn’t go through with the stunts, but enough. I didn’t have enough for my expansion yet, but I did have enough money to get those implants for my trailer that I promised in the first chapter! You’re welcome.