//------------------------------//
// 252. Relief by Fuzzyfurvert 
// Story: The Sun and the Stars: A Twilestia Prompt Collab 
// by Fuzzyfurvert 
//------------------------------//


by Fuzzyfurvert


***



"So...let me get this straight,"  Rainbow Dash furrowed her eyebrows as she looked her friend's ragged and sleep-deprived form over.  "You spent all weekend doing math and writing formula and making graphs."

"Venn diagrams!"

"Yeah...those."  Rainbow sighed.  "All that just to prove-"

"Her ass is perfect!  Too perfect!"  Twilight's eye twitched randomly.  "It's too firm, too tight, too supple with too much lift and bounce!  It has its own gravity!"

"Twi...everypony with a set of eyes knows that!"

"No, you don't understand!  It's too perfect with zero flaws on any metric.  IT. IS. UNREAL."  Twilight gasped and quickly took a swig of her own special brew no-sleep-til-canterlot coffee.  "I did the math!"

Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes and put a hoof over Twilight's shoulders.  "Twilight, of course it's unreal.  Celestia is unreal!  Isn't there a section in the library that's dedicated to her butt?"

Twilight was silent for a moment.  When she spoke, Twilight's voice was considerably quieter.  "Yeah...there is.  It's sandwiched between the classical poetry and the epic balads about Luna's historically significant orgies."

"See?"  Rainbow patted Twilight and turned the alicorn to face her.  "Now tell Dash why you wasted a weekend doing the 'ass math'?"

Twilight hung her head and sipped her coffee sullenly.  "Promise you won't tell?"

"Do I look like Pinkie?"

"Well," Twilight sniffled and shifted uncomfortably, "I-I…*sniff*...Rainbow...I want da bootyyyywhaaaahaHawwwaaa!"

Rainbow shook her head sadly as Twilight burst into tears and collapsed into Dash's chest.

"Wait.  Do you want to HAVE the booty, or...?"

"I w-want to…*sniff*...I want to..."  Twilight snorted as her muzzle started to drip.  "I can't even articulate what I want to do to that booty!"

Rainbow Dash smirked and held the crying princess close, stroking her mane softly.  "I know that feel.  I know that feel so very much, Twi.  Hush...no tears now.  Only dreams."