Appledashery

by Just Essay


Cool Mares Don't Look at Explosions

"Guhh! Ugh!" Rainbow Dash stood up, wincing. The ends of her mane were singed and she felt a tingling pain in her extremities. Nevertheless, she bravely stared into the blazing inferno that was left of the warehouse. "Noir! Speak to me, buddy! It would be so not cool to be a burning crisp right now!"

All that answered her was the wind-whipping noise of the persistent flame.

The mare hissed under her teeth. "A thousand 'dang its'!" She spun and gazed across the fire-lit warehouse district. "Who in the buck decided to play pyro?!" She blinked, her muzzle paling at a disturbing thought. "Ahhh poopsicle." She gulped. "This... th-this must mean--"

Just then, she heard a moaning sound from inside the flames.

With a gasp, Rainbow spun and shouted into the fire. "Noir?! Noir!"

Some of the smoke cleared. Rainbow could see that a portion of the building's first level had survived the blast. The flame was too bright for her to clearly see down the flickering interior, but she could have sworn she saw a twitching shadow. Once more, the moan resounded.

"Ah jeez ah jeez ah jeez..." Rainbow Dash took a deep breath, her ears folding back. "Well... you only melt once." Gritting her teeth, she took a running start, leapt, and flew--yelling--through the separate tongues of flame. In the midst of her heroic dive, she was ignorant of a griffon figure flying up from a distance.

Romulus hovered to a stop, shielding his feathery face from the flame and wincing. "For Tartarus' sake! Sh-she can't be serious...!"


FWOOOSH!

Rainbow flew in and skidded to a stop, her wings trailing with smoke and ashes. She stood on a patch of concrete, wheezing and coughing for breath. Crouching low, she crawled beneath the smoke, navigating a labyrinth of collapsed steel and brick.

"Nnnngh... Noir?!" Panting, she darted left and right, ruby eyes squinting across the burning wreckage. "Noir, where are you buddy?!" A patch of rooftop shifted to her left, billowing with flame. "Augh!" She shielded herself, sweating and wincing. "I-I'm willing to bet I know who did this, and if you wanna beat me up for it--you can do so, but later, okay?! I gotta find you!"

"Guh... R-Rainbow... Dash..."

Rainbow spun her head in the direction of the moan. The mare gasped instantly. "Dude!"

Swiiish! She glided over to where a bruised, bloody shape lay. The stallion had his eyes clenched shut. His legs curled to his chest as he coughed and heaved.

"Noir! You're alive!" Rainbow Dash sputtered. She looked closely at the stallion's battered body. "Oye... your left leg doesn't look so good, and neither does that wing..."

"They... th-they were too many," he wheezed. "Manehattan mafia. The ambushed me..."

"Yeah, well, you're a handsome enough guy, it's a wonder you didn't get glomped before." Rainbow Dash looked all around, surveying the interior. "Okay, I think there's a path that c-can take us out of this mess. Do you think you can walk?"

"I... w-was a fool," he exhaled, wincing. "Thought... th-thought they were my agent..."

"Your agent?!"

"From within... the agent of the Lunar C-Code..."

"I've no clue what in the McFuzz you're talking about..." Another part of the ceiling collapsed over them. Rainbow winced, then grasped Noir's body. "But I know that I gotta get you out of here, buddy!"

"They... th-they'll be waiting for us outside--"

"I don't care! I can't just leave you here!" Rainbow Dash hoisted his body over her spine. "Nnnnngh! Zecora, d-don't fail me now!"

"Aaugh--Aaaah!" Noir yelped in pain.

"Sorry, pal! No time to be gentle!"

"New Saros..." Noir wheezed. "It's... it's..."

"Huh?!"

"New Saros..."

"Hey! Good idea!" Rainbow grinned, spinning about. "If that portal to your moon fart dimension thingy is open, then we can totally get out of here--"

"No, you d-don't understand," Noir trembled to say. "The door is unstable. The mirror..."

"Huh?" Just then, Rainbow heard a disturbingly otherworldly ringing sound. She turned around.

Beyond a heap of burning wreckage, she saw the hint of a distorted indigo mirror. The magical structure was buckling, and the trans-dimensional energy was rippling out of it at an exponential rate.

"Uhhhhh..."

"Our bodies will..." Noir lost consciousness, stammering a few final words before giving in to pained slumber. "... not s-survive the temporal inversion..."

"'Temporal inversion' is about the unsexiest thing I've ever heard..."

Vrmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm--! The collapsing portal pulsed brightly.

"Awwwwwwww snap..." Rainbow twirled and spread her wings. "Hold on tight, Noir!"

FLASSSSSSH! The mirror collapsed into a singularity. A finite point of indigo light bubbled inward, sucking in entire planks of steel and lengths of crumbled brick.

Rainbow Dash flew as swiftly as she could, and yet she sensed that she was hovering in one place. Her eyes darted left and right in a panic, spotting waves of debris flying past her and into the anomaly at her rear. Slowly, she felt herself being pulled back into the ruptured portal, and it strained at the roots of her feathers. When she growled, she heard the eerie echo of her own voice reverberating behind her.

The ceiling gave way, splitting in two. Giant swaths of metal junk hurled their way at Rainbow. She held onto Noir tight while spinning to the left--then the right. She barely skimmed past the chunks of debris as they were swiftly sucked into the singularity. Next, plumes of flame billowed into the portal. The fire turned into a bright orange cyclone that whipped up and down, nearly singeing Rainbow with every twist of the horizontal tornado.

"Come on... move... move!" Rainbow hissed. To her joy, she started gaining distance, drifting forward. "Yeah! Oh yeah! Suck on that, astrophysics! You ain't got nothing on Rainbow Professionalism Gravity Defying Danger Dash--" Suddenly, the entire chamber flashed indigo. She surged forward as she sensed an energy discharge directly behind her. "Hoboy..."


Romulus squinted his one good eye into the blaze.

Three of Don Canter's stallions marched up, armed with clubs and knives.

"What's the deal, ya spruced up death pigeon?!" one barked. "You flying in after her or what?!"

"Wait!" Romulus insisted, hissing. "Shhhh!" He blinked. "Something isn't right..." He sensed a bright pulse of indigo light from within. The griffon sweated. "Awwwwww sh--"

POWWWW! The warehouse exploded louder than before. Chunks of roof and steel reinforcement were flung for miles. A rippling shockwave billowed from the epicenter, knocking every criminal off their hooves and sending them sailing across the street. Romulus struggled to fly upright before being slammed against the side of a wagon. He fell to the ground with a grunt while the warehouse district echoed with the collapse of concrete chunks.

As the noise and chaos settled, the faint sound of sirens could be heard in the distance. Don Canter's stallions struggled to their hooves, grunting and moaning in pain.

Several meters away...

"Woomfa..." Rainbow Dash crawled to her hooves, gritting her teeth. She shook dust and fiberglass off her fuzzy blue body with a sigh. Silently, she crawled over to where Noir's body lay--shuddering. "Hey... hey Noir!" She shook his shoulder. "I think I just survived Ragneighrok. You?"

"Owieeeeee..." the stallion murmured in a slurring tone.

"Whelp, that works for me." Rainbow heard shouting voices behind her. Taking a deep breath, she hoisted Noir yet again over her body and spread her wings. "Well, bad news, buddy. We just lost the back door to your moon hutt. Now I gotta find you a new safe house. And quick!" With a running start, she lifted off and glided across the filthy river that divided Fillydelphia.

From below, Romulus stood up, getting his bearings. He shook his feathery head, then glanced up. His eye widened upon seeing the runaway pegasus. "Oh no..." He sneered, spreading his wings and shooting skyward like a bullet. "Not this time, you stupid pony. Your blood is mine!"

Fwoooosh!