Poker Night
“Hey, Spike! Button!” Rumble called to the two excitedly as he saw them exit the library.
“Oh hey Rumble!” Button called back, waving. “What's up?! We aren't late for the Crusader meeting or anything, are we?” He asked, kinda confused on how he was acting.
“I don't think he'd be excited about that.” Spike responded, raising an inquisitive eyebrow as well. “So what's up?” Rumble bounce up and down on the spot.
“Thunderlane invited us to play poker with him and the other guys tonight! Isn't that cool?!”
“Uh...” Button stumbled, rubbing the back of his head sheepishly. “...I usually play Haylo tonight...”
“Oh c'mon Button, live a little!” Spike exclaimed, putting a claw on his shoulder. “I mean we were asked to hang out with the grown ups to do something grown up with them! Isn't that awesome?!” The brown colt let a small smile appear on his face.
“Yeah...I guess that is pretty cool.” He said, before nodding proudly. “Alright I'll come...Just don't tell my mom about it! She'd kill me if she ever found out I was gambling!”
“They don't gamble real money, Button.” Rumble said, rolling his eyes. “It's just a fun little pass time while the girls go to the Spa.” Then something occurred to Spike.
“Hold on. Do you think the only reason they invited us was because the girls invited Applebloom, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo to the Spa tonight?” The three thought about that for a moment before Rumble shrugged.
“Ah who cares!” He said, before he took the air and flew off towards the farm. “Last one to AB's house is a rotten apple!”
“Hey Applebloom, what's that you're playing?” Rainbow asked from the sofa in the Cutie Mark Crusader headquarters AKA Applebloom's house. She decided to visit the kids because...Well she had the day off and it was a slow day on the farm.
“Farmin' simulator...” She replied, moving the mouse to click on the options menu. Scootaloo rose an eyebrow at that.
“Of all the things to waste your money on! You LIVE on a farm, AB, you don't need a simulator for it!” She then turned to Sweetie Belle. “Right Sweetie Belle?”
“Shh! Building a waterfall!” She hushed her friend, playing her favourite game MineCraft. Scootaloo gave an exasperated sigh and turned to her adoptive mother.
“Why are all my friends nerds?” Rainbow laughed at that before they heard a knock on the door. “It's open guys!”
The three guys from earlier walked in, spotting each of their marefriends doing their own thing. “Um...Applebloom?” Spike asked, watching her sprite pony trying to plough the field.
“Shh...Be wit' ya in a sec, Babe.” Applebloom replied, continuing with her game.
“But you forgot to lower the plough into the dirt.” He pointed out, showing the unploughed field on the screen.
“What?! Aw, Ah just wasted half an hour!” Scootaloo nuzzled Rumble, but still managed to give a quick quip.
“Oh yeah, like you wouldn't have wasted your time ploughing a field that doesn't exist when you could just go outside and plough a REAL field!”
“Ooo waterfall!” Button said, excitedly watching Sweetie Belle play good old MineCraft. Rainbow rolled her eyes and stood up.
“Hey, I'm heading out to grab lunch with Mac and AJ. I think AJ invited everyone, so maybe you guys should come too. If just to get away from the video games for a while.” Rainbow commented as Sweetie Belle looked up.
“Sure, just let me save...”
“...Finished ploughing...” Applebloom said, getting her avatar in the barn to save. Spike grinned, forcing her away from the screen.
“C'mon AB, before you forget to eat again.”
“Hey everyone!” Pinkie announced as she popped out of Twilight's salad bowl, unexpectedly. She then frowned and plunged her hoof into the bowl, dragging Cheese out of there as well. “There you are!”
“Here I am!” Cheese grinned, before noticing everyone else staring at the two of them in amazement. “What? Do I have something in my teeth?” He asked, poking his teeth with a hoof.
“...Don't worry about it...” Thunderlane answered, shuffling closer to Rarity to clear some space for the two.
“Okie Doki Loki!” Pinkie cheered, sitting in the space with Cheese.
“Hey Cheese, don't forget about Poker tonight!” Soarin commented, to which Applejack rose an eyebrow.
“Ah jus' got a quick question, how come y'all never invited any girls ta play Poker wit' you guys?” Rainbow nodded.
“Yeah! Is it a guy thing? Some sexist, guy thing?” Soarin rose an eyebrow.
“No. Mares are welcome to play.” He answered to their further confusion.
“...Okay, so what is it then?” Rainbow asked.
“It's jus' that we jus' don't know any mares that know how ta play Poker...” Braeburn answered, the guys nodding in agreement. The girls then started to argue...Well all of them except Fluttershy who sat there quietly.
Mac interrupted them with a simple question. “Um...Do any o' Y'ALL know how ta play Poker?”
“...No!” All of the mares and the three fillies answered all at once.
“But you could teach us?” Twilight said, to which the guys shook their heads.
“We ain't exactly teachers...And it ain't something we can just teach overnight.” Flash said, taking a bite out of his sandwich. “...Why do you want play, anyway? We always play when you girls go to the spa so it's not like you do nothing when we play.”
“Well, unfortunately, the spa is undergoing repairs since...Cutie Mark Crusader Mud Bath Wrestlers...” Rarity answered, looking at the five ponies and one dragon responsible.
“...In our defence, we didn't expect the walls to blow up when Spike sneezed.” Scootaloo defended.
"We also didn't realize Spike blew fire when he sneezed, we thought it was just when he burped!" Button continued.
“Yeah, an' how were we supposed ta know he was allergic ta tha lilacs in their gardens?” Applebloom concluded, giving him a one armed hug. “Besides, Aloe an' Lotus did say they were thinkin' about expandin' tha buildin' anyhow.”
“Well...I guess we could tell them the basics...” Soarin finally caved, not wanting to leave the girls alone for the night.
“Aw c'mon, Ah'm sure it'll be fun!” AJ consoled him, smiling.
“Okay, so now. We draw cards...” Thunderlane explained, slowly, as he passed out two cards per player.
The group decided to play cards in the Apple's barn tonight since they have a much bigger group than they usually do. So the seventeen ponies and one dragon sat around a large table, which made it kinda of difficult to see the cards in the middle. As a result, Twilight had to use a neat little projector spell which displays the centre cards on a screen created in a cloud of purple smoke in the centre so everyone can see.
“And then I play three cards face up in the middle. The trick is to try and find matching numbers in your hand and on the table, Ace is the highest, then King, then Queen, then Jack, then Ten, downwards...”
Twilight interrupted. “How comes Ace is the highest? Isn't the Ace a one?”
“Sometimes in other games...” Soarin answered. “But here, it's the highest card you can get. Not sure why, but try not to let it get to ya.”
“Four of a kind is one of the best hands you can get...”
“Hey I got four sixes!” Rainbow cheered, happily. The guys face-hoofed while some of the others, like Twilight, Fluttershy and Sweetie Belle congratulated her.
“Sweetie...” Mac said to her, causing her to look up. “Yer not supposed ta tell anypony that. Yer supposed ta keep it from them so you can raise tha bets in tha round. If'n they know fer a fact yer hand is better than theirs, they'll jus' fold an' ya won't win any o' tha chips...”
“Oh...Whoops.” Thunderlane rolled his eyes.
“It's fine, this is just a practice hand...” Pinkie then put her cards on the table and slid them back. “Um...Yes Pinkie?”
“I want a reshuffle!”
“Um...This isn't Magic the Gathering. You can't reshuffle...” Thunderlane explained, looking at her two cards and saw two Jacks. “And you have a pair of high cards! Why?”
“They don't look happy and I couldn't cheer them up!” Thunderlane sighed and just shuffled them in and gave her two new cards.
Pinkie looked at her two and seven and smiled. “That's better!”
“There are other ways you could win too. Some of the other hands you can get are straights, which is when you have five numbers that go in order, like two, three, four, five and six. A flush, which is the same thing, but when they're in the same suite as well, like Diamonds or Spades. Then ya got the strongest hand, which is the royal flush which is a Ten, Jack, Queen, King and Ace all in the same suite.” Thunderlane explained, handing out a few sheets. “Here, I wrote them all up so you all have a reference.”
“Then we get to the betting stages!” Cheese announced, happily. “The Pony to the left of the Dealer always places their bet first! They have to put down at least one chip! Then the player next to them can either just put in one chip, fold or raise. If you fold, you don't participate, even if the cards flipped over later works to your advantage. If you raise, you can place more than one chip. The amount of extra chips is up to you, then the player that goes next has to match it or they fold or even raise further! After everypony has decided if they're in or not, they can then check! That means they flip over another card in the centre!”
“Eeyup...” Big Mac interrupted, before Cheese starts to trail off. He tends to do that if he's talking for too long. “There can only be five cards in tha middle, but those cards are fer everypony ta use. So remember to check if'n tha cards in tha middle ain't ta ya likin' right then an' there.”
“An' that's all ya need ta know!” Braeburn finished, looking amongst the gathered ponies. “Any questions?” When nopony answered, he grinned. “Alrighty then let's play!”
“Hold on!” Soarin interrupted. “Maybe the girls should have a few practice rounds against each other before we play.”
“...Well sure, sounds good.” Thunderlane agreed. “Everypony, find yourselves a partner...” He said as he sat next to Rarity.
Everyone then found their significant other and sat next to them. Twilight with Flash, Applejack with Soarin, Rainbow with Mac, Fluttershy with Braeburn, Pinkie with Cheese, Sweetie with Button, Scootaloo with Rumble and Applebloom with Spike.“...I should of really seen this coming.”
“Yeah like I woulda picked anypony else!” Rainbow grinned, leaning against Mac, before pausing. “Well maybe Scootaloo, but she's playing too.”
“Yer a poet, an' ya didn't even know it!” Applejack shot back, grinning. The others rolled their eyes as Pinkie snatched the cards.
“I bugsy dealer!” She announced, shuffling them around faster than the Pony eye could conceive.
“...She and Cheese are the same pony...They've got to be...” Flash said to himself, to which Twilight shrugged.
“It really wouldn't surprise me, and that kind of scares me too...”
“Alright two cards each!” She said as she threw each pony two cards like ninja shurikens, actually embedding themselves into the table they were playing on. She then threw three cards in the middle, while also remembering to discard a card before throwing one to said position. They were the Two of Diamonds, Queen of Spades and Seven of Spades.
“Don't look like there's much hope of a flush or straight right now...” Twilight mentioned, studying her hand and the reference sheet by her side, as well as the cards in the centre. The pony to be initiating the bets was Applebloom, followed by Scootaloo then Applejack, Rarity, Sweetie Belle, Rainbow, Fluttershy, Twilight then back to Pinkie.
Applebloom looked at her cards with Spike, shrugged and threw in a chip out of her fifty.
“...Uh call?” Scootaloo said, throwing in a chip, causing Rumble to face-hoof.
“Scoots. You're suppose to look at your hand first.” Scootaloo rose an eyebrow, looking at the cards.
“Say, why is it called a hand anyway? Spike's the only one with hands here!” The others looked at her.
“...Hey that's a good point!” Twilight agreed, raising an inquisitive eyebrow.
“It's because tha game originated from tha Dragon Kingdom an' tha dragons would play tha game wit' travellin' ponies ta con 'em outta there gems an' coins ta add ta their hoard.” Mac answered, shruggin'. “That's where Ma an' Pa learned ta play, anyway.”
“So that's why they came back so early wit' no money tha first time! Ah thought they just blew it all in Las Pegasus or somethin'!” Applejack exclaimed, before glancing down at her cards, a wide grin spreading on her face, which everyone saw. “Ah'll raise.” She said, throwing six chips in the middle.
“Fold.”
“Fold.”
“Fold.”
“Fold.”
“Fold.”
“Fold.”
“Fold.”
“Fold.” Each of them declared, throwing their cards in the middle. Applejack blink, showing the two Queens in her hand.
“...How in tarnation did y'all figure Ah have a good hand?!” She asked as she gained two chips from the round. Soarin sighed as he remembered that Applejack is the Element of Honesty, and thus would be a very, VERY bad bluffer.
“...Nevermind. Applebloom's turn to be Dealer.” Thunderlane said as Twilight used her magic to move all the cards to the yellow Earth pony.
“...Um...” She said, picking the cards up and picked a few in the centre to throw onto the top. Then she lost her grip and the cards fell all over the table in front of her, much to her embarrassment. “Sorry...”
She turned to Spike, putting on the puppy dog eyes, pouting. “Could ya shuffle 'em fer me please, Spikey?” Spike blushed hard, but did as he was asked, shuffling the deck flawlessly, passing the cards around. Applebloom nuzzled him as thanks and turned back around.
“...Spike is SO whipped!” Rainbow whispered to Fluttershy, who giggled a bit in agreement. She thought it was kind of cute, while Rainbow thought it was quite funny.
“Alright...” Scootaloo said, looking at her King of Spades and Ace of Diamonds, looking at the Three of Hearts, Two of Clubs and Two of Hearts in the middle. “Here's one chip.” She said, throwing it in. “If I can get a four and five in the middle, I'll have a straight, right?” She whispered to Rumble, who nodded.
“Yup, good work.”
Applejack, once again, had a huge, obvious grin on her face as she said. “Ah'll raise.” She said. To which the answer from everypony else was.
“Fold.”
“Fold.”
“Fold.”
“Fold.”
“Fold.”
“Fold.”
“Fold.”
Applejack blinked and showed the two aces in her hands. “Wow...That's pretty creepy...” She muttered to herself, while the guys tried their best to hide the amused smirks from their faces while Twilight passed the deck over to Scootaloo.
Scootaloo placed the deck of cards between her petite wings and flapped them wildly, somehow making the cards shuffle amongst themselves in the pile.
The other Pegasi stared at her slack-jawed as she took the deck back. She rose an eyebrow. “What?”
“That was awesome!” Rainbow exclaimed, shocking the little Pegasus. “How did you do that?!”
“...I thought all Pegasi could do this?”
“It isn't something we're born with, if that's what you're saying.” Soarin replied. Scootaloo rubbed the back of her head, sheepishly.
“Well, I learned how to do it when we were trying to be Cutie Mark Crusader Magicians...”
“...But that didn't turn out so good...” Applebloom continued.
“...And somehow, we got covered in tree sap.” Sweetie Belle finished, an odd look on her face. “We weren't even near any trees!”
Scootaloo shrugged, using her wing to flick the cards to each player, effortlessly. “I figured if I can't fly with these yet, I should do something with them...I just didn't realise I'd ever have to do this again.”
The cards in the centre, this time, were the King of Hearts, Jack of Hearts and the Ten of Hearts. Applejack smiled, victoriously, throwing a chip in the middle. Almost predictably...
“Fold.”
“Fold.”
“Fold.”
“Fold.”
“Fold.”
“Fold.”
“Fold.”
“It's like y'all can read mah mind!” She said, throwing her Queen and Jack of Hearts in the middle, the royal flush. “Ah don't wanna play anymore!”
Soarin wrapped a wing around her shoulders. “It's okay, AJ, we just have to work on your Poker Face.”
“...Mah what?” She asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Your Poker Face. It's what we use to describe your facial expression when you're bluffing. You basically have to lie about how good your cards are. You could have the worst cards ever, but you could bluff to make your opponents think you'll win so they'll fold.” Soarin then smiled, bopping her on the nose. “And you, AJ, have the worst Poker Face ever...”
She huffed, crossing her hooves across her chest. “Not mah fault Ah'm tha Element o' Honesty... Blame destiny or somethin'...”
“Well, since AJ's no longer playing, We'll pass dealing over to Rarity.” Rumble said, said pony gathering all the cards in her direction.
“Thank you Darling...” She said, shuffling the deck and dealing the cards out.
(The amount of chips each pony has left are as follows:
Pinkie: 50
AB: 49
Scootaloo:48
AJ: OUT
Rarity: 50
Sweetie Belle: 50
Rainbow: 50
Fluttershy: 50
Twilight: 50)
The cards in the middle were the Three of Clubs, Ace of Diamonds and the Seven of Hearts. Rarity throw a chip in the middle.
Sweetie Belle looked disgusted about something, while looking over her cards. Button rose an eyebrow. “Uh...Are you okay, Sweetie Belle?” She shook her head as she spat out one of her playing chips.
“Yuck! They don't taste like chips at all!” Button face-hoofed himself, mostly for not noticing his fillyfriend trying to eat plastic chips.
“Sweetie Belle, they're playing chips. Not potato chips...” She blinked and looked at them.
“Oh! I thought they tasted a bit...plasticky...” He looked at the chips in front of her and counted them.
“Uh...Why are there only thirty-nine chips here?” Sweetie Belle looked away in embarrassment.
“Um...I may have already eaten eleven of them...” Their eyes widened as Thunderlane looked at the box.
“I know it says for ages thirteen and up, but I didn't think a twelve year old would eat anything!” He exclaimed, snatching Sweetie Belle up and flying towards the door. “I'll take her to the hospital!”
“I'll come with you dear!” Rarity agreed, to which Button also got up, worried about his fillyfriend.
With that, the four raced out the door, much to the mixed reactions of the others. Some were shocked, others were confused and the rest were finding this incredibly funny. Mac looked at the box and sighed in relief.
“At least tha chips are non-toxic...” He told everyone. "She'll have an upset stomach fer a bit, but it won't be fatal at least...”
“But how are they gonna get something like this out!” Spike exclaimed, holding up the chip, which had about a two inch diameter. “I'm kinda surprised she could swallow it in the first place!”
“...That's what she said!” Rainbow said, grinning. The others rolled their eyes at her as Mac tried to answer.
...Key word, TRIED.
“Um...Well, they'll probably give 'er a potion ta break down tha chips enough so...she can er...She can...Expel 'em?”
“Like a spell from Harry Trotter?” Scootaloo asked, innocently. Rainbow shot a glare at Twilight.
“I still hate you for getting her hooked on those, by the way.” She complained. “I don't understand any of it!”
“Um...Not quite...It's so she can...Uh...Excrete 'em...”
“...What's excrete mean?” Applebloom asked, curiously. Mac sweated a little bit.
“Um...So they...um...They....”
“It's so she can poo them out!” Applejack exclaimed, much to the horror of the two fillies and colt.
“EWWWW!!”
“Why the heck would you say that?!” Twilight responded, eyes wide as she saw the three younger ponies try to get that mental image out of their subconscious.
“...Ah figured they were a little more mature than this. They're in relationships fer cryin' out loud!”
“They're still twelve!”
“...Can we play something else, please?” Fluttershy asked quietly, causing the entire room to pause and look at her.
Braeburn shrugged. “Well alight, Sweetheart, what do you want ta play?”
“Ah still can't believe Fluttershy has fencin' gear...” Applejack said, admiring the long, blade in her hoof through the large, black cage like head gear.
“I can't believe she never told us that she fenced!” Rainbow exclaimed, sending a look over to said Pegasus who was adorning her own gear. “How come you never told us about this?”
“...Well...N-nopony ever asked...” Twilight rolled her eyes.
“Oh yes, I forgot that's how it works! We're supposed to ask you every single thing you could do, in case you do do it! While we're at it, are you into extreme rock climbing too?” She asked, sarcastically, to which Fluttershy rubbed the back of her head.
“Well...Now that you mention it...” She started, producing a rock climbing helmet out of the saddlebags she brought from her house.
There was a pause of about ten seconds before it was broken by Flash. “Wow, we really need to get to know Fluttershy better...”