(A/N: again, credits to Bronymaster for editing and ideas to my friends)
Please enjoy
“Well, where the bucking apples is that ‘Baldrick’ which the general speaks off?” I sighed while looking for the specific earth pony in the crowded station. I already ordered Sky to search from the sky, while I search from the ground. I may be a pegasus, but flying around metropolis isn’t my thing.
Out of the sea of crowds, there’s this light blue pegasus walking with a brown earth pony wearing glasses. Assuming that these are the ponies I was looking for, I met them halfway of their journey.
“Private Baldrick reporting for duty, sir!” he barked at me as I stood in front of him. Everypony in the immediate vicinity started looking at us with mixed expression. I, not wanting to attract more attention, drag him to a nearby alley with Sky following us.
“Where did you see Private Baldrick?” I ask Sky
“In one of the pubs downtown.” he replied while keeping a vigilant watch on the alley.
“So Private Baldrick, I suppose you’re going to give me what I want?”
“Alright sir!” he gave me a letter which he took out of his saddlebag.
“And one more thing, sir. I was reassigned to your mission, sir.”
I kept the letter inside my saddlebag “Alright, you two listen” I looked at them both in turn, making sure they were paying attention. “We will be doing an undercover mission, and I don’t want you two blowing our cover.” I look at both of them intently, just to show how serious I am about the mission.
“Oh sweet! 6 month R & R!” Sky chimed in.
I looked at Baldrick to see if he got my point. He nods, and assuming that he understood the importance of our mission, I told them to start packing up so we can head off to Ponyville.
We reach station, pay for our ticket and got on the train. We got this pretty spacious private room. Sky suddenly barged in and jumped on the couch “My, this couch is comfortable. Unlike those in the barracks. Those couches were stiff as a board.” He said while changing his sitting position about every 5 seconds.
Then Baldrick came in second. He was quiet when he entered, seemingly observing every nook and cranny of the room. After half a minute of observing, he sits besides Sky, whom is still changing his position upon the couch.
I knew this would be a very long and boring journey, so I decided to reread all the info and objectives on my journal about 5 times. As I read the name ‘Twilight Sparkle’ I remembered something that I couldn’t quite put my hoof on.
Twilight Sparkle, I do know I heard the name “Sparkle” somewhere. I’ve got a feeling that this will lead to a bad start, but I need more info-”
My train of thought was interrupted by Baldrick, who was tapping my side. I was annoyed, I don’t like it when someone interrupts me while I’m thinking.
“What is it?” i ask in both angry and annoyed tone of voice
“It’s your turn now, sir” said Baldrick.
“For what?” I ask him back while maintaining my posture. it’s no use getting angry at my two subordinates.
“Alright, again. I spy, with my little eye, something” Sky was looking around the room to find that something. It was pretty obvious that he stopped to look at a mug for 2 seconds. Then he finished his question. “beginning with M.”
I did a facehoof, to my dismay. Then, suddenly, Baldrick tries to answer the ‘I spy’ question of Sky.
“m-m-ma-ma-” he was stuttering, and Sky tried to help by gesturing his head towards the mug. To no avail, he took the cup and placed it between them, still helping Baldrick to finish his word.
Me, not wanting to keeps this stupid charade forever, i shouted “MUUUGGGG” at the very top of my lungs. The two of them were surprised by my sudden outburst, though Sky was smiling and Baldrick still had this neutral expression.
“I’d say, well done sir. Your turn.” he praised my sudden outburst of an answer. Thinking about the train, I say “I spy with my bored little eye, something beginning with T.”
“Breakfast” Baldrick answered without hesitation.
“What?” I ask in confusion.
“My breakfast always begins with Tea, then I have a little dandelion sandwich, then a pancake with honey.” he answered while daydreaming about that breakfast.
“Baldrick, when I said it begins with ‘T’, I was talking about a letter.” I replied with great annoyance.
“Naaww, it never begins with a letter. The mailpony don’t come till 10:30.” he replied with the same expression as before.
I closed my journal out of frustration and looked at Sky. “Sky, take over. I cannot cope with this.” I stand up, to get out of the room filled with the air of stupidity.
“Ok, sir. Now I spy with my little eye something beginning with R.” Sky asked another question.
With raised hoof Baldrick answers “Army.”
“For Celestia’s sake Baldrick, the Army starts with an A.” Then I pointed at Sky. “He thought of something that starts with an R; rrrrr” I tried pronouncing the letter R so Baldrick could get the idea of what I said.
“Cat!” he exclaimed as he stood up.
“Wha- What?”
“A cat starts with a ‘purr’.”
“Alright! Alright!” I was trying to interrupt him on his mimicking of sounds.
“My turn again. What begins with ‘Come here’ and ends in ‘Ow’?”
“I don’t know.” answered Baldrick.
“Come here” then I punch the sense out of him in the face. “Ow!” yelp Baldrick before he was knocked unconscious.
“Well done.”
Sky, seeing my frustration and anger, kept quiet in his seat and tended to the unconscious Baldrick. It was my very first time that my anger gone out of control because of their stupidity. I used to laugh at stupidity, but now my anger got the better of me. I do feel bad about hitting Baldrick, but it was the only way to stop the senseless game. I’ll try to apologize once he wakes up.