I awoke to the smell of vanilla and soft fur against my cheek. A deep, rhythmic drumming almost lulled me back to sleep, the warm furry mass enveloping me the most comfortable, welcoming prison I could've imagined. I buried my face against the wall of fur, inhaling the sweet scent and letting myself melt, a content hum rumbling from my throat.
"I see you're awake."
My eye shot open, and I fell off the bed with an indignant squawk. When did Celestia get here? I looked around from my spot on the floor, my eyes scanning for anyone present.
No one...was I hearing things? And now that I think about it...I was snuggling something on the bed. Something warm and alive.
...Oh my God. I slowly sat up, peering over the edge of the bed, to see Celestia stretched out across the mattress devoid of her usual royal regalia.
Oh sweet Christ, did we... I cleared my throat, trying to fight down the embarrassment. "...Hello, Celestia." I stood, straightening my toga and doing my absolute best to keep a straight face. "I don't suppose you remember what happened last night?"
Her smile fell, and she began to look very guilty of something. "First...how much do you remember?"
I scowled, crossing my arms. "I visited Ponyville, got attacked by Sparkle, and wound up back here...somehow. Now answer the question."
The princess gulped, "my sister placed a mind-altering spell on you when she entered your dream, and—"\
"WHAT?!" I shouted, "Luna fucking brainwashed me?!" Ohhh, this went beyond drugging, even Twilight fucking Sparkle and Rainbow Dash never tried to mind-rape me. "What did she make me do?"
"She didn't brainwash you, she just—"
"What. Did. She. Do?" I couldn't keep the absolute contempt out of my voice, my face showing nothing but disgust.
"...The spell suppressed your negative emotions, like anger, fear, and sadness." Celestia explained, "without them, it was...very easy to convince you to follow my lead."
I raised an eyebrow. "And 'following your lead' lead to us sharing a bed?"
Celestia winced, and looked down at the crumpled sheets. "I had to break the spell before the emotional imbalance unraveled your mind. You passed out afterwards."
I paced the room, sighing and putting a hand to my face. "And no one thought it a good idea to tell me about the spell?"
"We weren't sure how you would react."
I stopped. I took a deep breath through my nose, exhaling through my mouth. "You were afraid of how I would react."
"My sister was, yes. She didn't want you to be angry with her."
"Let me finish. She was afraid of how I would react. While I was under the spell."
Celestia nodded. "Yes?"
"That same spell that prevented me from feeling anger or fear. Correct?"
Celestia didn't respond, biting her lip and looking down.
"Celestia...you're a fucking idiot." I glared, my voice lowering to a dead hiss. "The deal is off. I'm leaving." I turned and opened the door, walking down the hall.
"And where will you go?" I heard hoofsteps trotting after me, so I sped up.
"Fuck if I know! The griffons, maybe! The minotaurs! But if I ever see a fucking pony again, I'll jump in front of a train!" I heard a faint pop, and Celestia appeared in front of me in a flash of light.
"Jason, I know you're upset, but think about this!" She pleaded, "we can help you!"
"You've helped enough!" I snarled, my hands balling into fists. "I'm SICK of your help!" I roughly pushed past her, storming away. "EVERYTHING you ponies have told me has been a lie! 'Equestria is the land of magic and friendship!' LIE! 'Ponies are kind, accepting creatures!' LIE!" I forced my breathing to slow, my voice shaky but calm. "I'm through with you. I've tried things your way, and it didn't work. I'm leaving. And I will fight back if you try to stop me."
"...Do you hate me?" I stopped, closing my eyes. Mother...fucker... Celestia continued, her voice getting closer. "You promised you wouldn't hate me after what I did."
"I'm really...really considering it." I pushed on, walking away. This time, Celestia didn't follow.
I exited the castle with surprising ease. The worrying lack of security once again worked in my favor, allowing me to walk out into the crowded streets of Canterlot unmolested. I kept my head low, wading through the throngs of ponies with little difficulty. Luckily for me, they were still not thrilled with being near me. I inwardly stewed on the previous conversation, eyebrows furrowed. Why would Luna do that? She saw what I've been through, did she really think I'd be okay with that? What was she thinking? I rolled my eyes. She wasn't...that much is obvious.
"There it is! That's the monster!" I looked up, my eye scanning the ponies around me until I saw a familiar pony pointing a hoof at me, just as ridiculously dressed as before. Huh. He got a new sword. I walked faster, taking a detour down an alley. Just get away. There's no point in causing a scene.
I walked down the alleys, turning at every corner to try and lose what I was sure was my pursuers. The growing sound of hooves pounding against stone spurred me on, picking up speed until I was running. Glancing over my shoulder, I saw the ringleader turning the last corner just as I disappeared behind the next wall.
A dead-end...why was there always a dead end? Well, fiction-universe, fiction-laws. I looked up to the ledge. Ten feet. No trashcans. There was no way I'd make it. I turned back to face on the crowd...Well, I say crowd, it was only five ponies. Still, I could only take out one at a time...I gulped and lowered myself into a crouch, arms out to my side. Maybe if I make a break for it...
Just as the first lunged, time slowed. For a split-second I thought it was adrenaline, until everything around me stopped dead in it's tracks, the world fading into a washed-out grey. What...The Hell?
"It's a shame, isn't it?" I whirled around, narrowing my eye at the owner of that familiar, familiar voice. The draconequus was leaning against the wall, examining the talons of his eagle-claw.
I narrowed my eyes, slipping into the same crouch I had previously. "Discord...what're you trying to pull?"
"I'm just helping a fellow outcast!" He exclaimed, launching into the air and hovering a few feet off the ground. My eye twitched when I noticed his wings were completely still. "Can't I offer an obviously much-needed helping hand?" I flinched back when he offered his lion's paw, which had been detatched from the rest of him at some point.
Fighting to regain my composure, I scowled at the trickster. "No. Whatever you're trying to do, leave me out of it." I turned to walk away, but shuddered as I felt a clammy, scaly claw draped around my shoulder.
"And leave you to face these ponies all alone?"
I sighed and ducked under the arm. "I'm used to it."
"Oh, but now you're popular." He hissed into my ear, making me shudder violently and take a wild swing, "has Celestia at least punished the ones responsible for your predicament?" I could hear the sick grin in his voice.
"Like she would...." I muttered, crossing my arms. I turned back to glare at the too-innocent looking draconequus, a gargoyle-esque frown making it abundantly clear how I felt about him. "Are you getting to something here?"
"All I'm saying is I'm surprised you haven't done anything about all this!" Discord shouted, "if it were me, I would've turned their world upside-down like—"
"Like you already did. Yeah, I figured you would." I rolled my eyes. "If you really want to help me, just drop me off somewhere outside Canterlot. I honestly don't care where."
"Oh, I'll do more than that..." He chuckled, pressing his forehead to mine. My vision was filled with scarlet and yellow, but I refused to back down. "What if I said I could help you give these ponies exactly what they deserve?"
I squeezed my eyes shut, trying my best to block him out. "I know what you're trying to do, and no. I just want to be left alone."
The trickster growled and pushed away, pacing back and forth across the alley. "I just don't get you! Why don't you want to see this place burn? Anyone would after going through what you did!"
I smirked. "If the spirit of chaos can't make sense of me, maybe I should take the mantle?" A swat to the back of my head was his response.
"Shush. We're talking about your problems here, not mine. And I think I know what yours is..." He grinned, stroking his chin. "After all this, you still have some loyalty to your little show-ponies, don't you?"
I tried to deny it, but...I couldn't. I did still love the ponies from my show. I furrowed my eyebrows, clenching my jaw. "How do you know about that?"
"Oh, you humans and your funny little heads!" He cackled, arching his back until his ears touched his heels, "did you honestly think your society could discover interdimensional portal technology yourselves?"
My mind stopped. I stared at the draconequus for what felt like an eternity, gaping like a fish. "I...wha...y..."
Discord gave a wolfish grin, pouncing at the opportunity. "Oh, I can. I did."
I gathered just enough of my wits to dumbly ask, "...why?"
"Because, Jason Wright...you deserve it."
I closed my eyes, breathing heavily. "And everything that happened?"
"The Element Bearers are supposed to be the epitome of good." Discord's face screwed up as if he had eaten something bad. "Frankly, I am disgusted by what they did. That's why I'm helping you."
I blinked. "I thought you were—"
"Reformed? Oh, I am." He grinned darkly. "Doesn't mean my little ponies don't need to be taught a lesson every once in a while. So..." He leaned in again, eyes narrowing with his impish grin. "How can I help You?"
I took a shaky breath, closing my eyes. Steeling my resolve, I stared directly into the mismatched eyes of chaos itself. "I want to make them pay." Discord grinned wider than his face should've allowed, but I cut him off before he could speak. "BUT...I want to try it my way first. Take me to Celestia."