//------------------------------// // The Race to Victory // Story: Friendship is Epic - Book 1: My Big Flare (COMPLETE REMAKE) // by FlareGun45 //------------------------------// You know the kind of pony that does nothing but silly and ridiculous things that may seem insulting and irritating and wonders why his life sucks? Well… that was me. Every time I tried to be myself, I always had bullies that picked on me and random ponies I met in my life either ignore me or betray me – disharmony. That’s when I realized I needed to learn friendship. So I packed my things and moved to Ponyville and learned friendship from the best of the best. I’m just trying to be a better pony. My name is Flare. Earlier that day I got a letter saying that it’s time to renew my vending license, so I went over to Twilight’s house so she can help me out. “So you need to renew your vending license, huh?” Twilight asked. “Didn’t the narrator just say that?” I asked. “Didn’t you just open your shop a few months ago?” Twilight asked. “I’ve been vending for years. I had a pizza stand back at Mareami. It was going great until the bullies caught up with me and trashed it.” I said. “I see. So what do you need me for?” Twilight asked. “Well, to renew my vending license, I need to pass a series of tests, so-“ I explained but Twilight interrupted me with her excitement. “TESTS?! Why didn’t you say so?!” Twilight yelled in excitement. “So. Ok I said so.” I said. Heh, try saying that 10 times fast. “Yeah, Spike said you’re pretty excited about tests.” I said. “Yeah, I said she’s pretty excited about tests.” Spike said as he walked by, sweeping the floor. “And he also said you’re really into helping ponies study.” I said. “Yeah and I said she’s really into helping ponies study.” Spike said as he swept by again. “So I was wondering, maybe you can help me study.” I said. “Are you kidding?!” Twilight yelled. “Soooo, that’s a yes but you’re making it sound like a no right now with your excitement that sounds like you’re angry?” I asked. “You just like spoiling the moment, don’t you Flare?” Twilight teased. “Yeah, he likes spoiling the moment, don’t you Flare?” Spike repeated. “Spike, quit it.” Twilight instructed him. “No, let him keep going. I’m liking it.” I said. “Yeah, let me keep going, he’s liking it.” Spike teased. Twilight glares at him, and I glare at Twilight. “Why are you glaring at me?” Twilight asked me. “You glare at Spike a lot, so I’m doing the same thing to you, and see if you like it.” I said as I continued glaring at her. “I only glare at Spike to show him what he’s saying or doing is wrong.” Twilight said. “What if your glaring is wrong, huh Twilight?” I asked. Twilight just stood there silently. “Uhhh, Twilight?” I tried to get her attention, but just then, Twilight’s face starts sinking into a vortex in the middle of her face, and the vortex started getting larger and larger. “Oh, you shouldn’t confuse Twilight, Flare. You just divided by 0.” Spike said. Twilight’s face vortex starts getting larger and larger until all of Twilight’s library gets sucked in, and then Ponyville, and then all of the northeast of Equestria, then all of Equestria, then the whole planet, then all of the galaxy we’re in, then the whole universe gets sucked into Twilight’s face vortex, and before I knew it, I was waking up in the middle of Twilight’s library. “Flare? Flare, are you alright?” Twilight asked. “Uh, what? What happened?” I asked as I was rubbing my head. “You were glaring at me and then you fell asleep.” Twilight said. “Sorry, Twilight. Every time I glare at somepony for more than 10 seconds, my eyes start to get too squinty and the squintier they get, I get tired and fall asleep.” I said. “It’s ok. Sooo…” Twilight started to get really excited. “You want me to help you study for your vending licence exam?!” “I have problems studying on my own. I can’t just read the book. I need somepony to lecture me.” I said. “Well you came to the right place, Flare! I love helping ponies study for their exams! Exams make me feel so alive!” Twilight said. “Sorry to disappoint you, Twilight, but you’re not the one taking it. I am.” I said. “Regardless, I LOVE helping ponies study! Which method to you prefer? High lighting? Flashcards?” Twilight asked. “Flashcards.” I said. “Ooooo, my favorite! Excellent choice! I’ll get the best flashcards from my drawer!” Twilight said as she ran over to her desk and she took out a mountain-high size of flashcards. “Uhh, I-I don’t think I’m gonna need that many cards, Twilight.” I said. “Right, sorry. I can’t control myself sometimes when it comes to studying! IT’S JUST SO MUCH FUN!” Twilight yelled in excitement as she jumped up and down. “Are you sure you’re Twilight, because you’re acting a lot like Pinkie Pie.” I said. “Sorry, Flare, sorry.” Twilight said as she took a deep breath. “I’m calm, I’m calm.” “Good, so what I need to write on these cards is-“ I said but was interrupted by Twilight’s jumping up and down again. “TWILIGHT!” “Sorry, sorry!” Twilight said. “Take a chill pill, Light! You’re more worked up than an Egyptian slaver.” I said. A cutaway shows me as an Egyptian slave, mining some rocks underground. A slaver comes by real angry and yelled, “YOU’RE NOT WORKING HARD ENOUGH! FASTER! FASTER!” he started whipping. “OW! OW! OW!” I yelled. “You scum sicken me! THAT’S MY WIFE YOU STOLE!” the slaver yelled. “Wait… what?” I asked. “I mean FASTER!” the slaver yelled as he whipped me again. “Ooooooh, so that’s what this is about?” I asked. “SHUT UP!” the slaver yelled. “Are you ok, brah? What’s troubling you?” I asked. “Well… I… my wife cheated on me with a slave. I used to be a blacksmith before this, but after I saw my wife with that slave, I started to hate them all!” the slaver explained. “Look, brah, not all slaves are bad, and you know what? I don’t think all slavers are bad either. You’re a good slaver, my friend.” I said. “You really think so?” the slaver asked as he started to smile. “I know so. How about you take off these chains and I can give you a hug?” I suggested. The slaver happily removed my chains and held his arms out. “There we go! That wasn’t so hard now, was it?” I asked as I gave him a hug, but as I was hugging me, I did the Vulcan… uhh… buck on his shoulder and he passed out. “Quick, slavers! We’re free!” “But isn’t there a bunch more guards outside?” a slave asked. “Let me tell you boys a little thing I like to call… feels.” I said. The cutaway ends. “Alright, Flare.” Twilight said as she gave me some flashcards and helped me write them down. “Our flashcards are finished. Want me to quiz you?” “No, thank you, Twilight. I have all I need to pass.” I said as I took the flashcards and I was about to walk out. “So who’s going to quiz you?” Twlight asked. “He’s gonna cheat.” Spike said as he walked by, sweeping the floor. “Shhhh!” I shushed him. “But Flare, you came to me for help. Why are you cheating?” Twilight asked. “I always cheat on my tests. How else did you think I got through the first two years of college?” I asked. “But if you get caught, they’re going to take your vending license away!” Twilight said. “Sista, I’ve been cheating for years. I know how to cheat without getting caught. I’ve never been caught once!” I said. “That’s because teachers don’t care. They barely teach you, and when you test, all they do is fall asleep on their desks, listening to their iPods or iPhones, maybe text their friends dinner plans and keep texting them until they’re really irritated with all the questions.” Spike said. “That’s not true, Spike. Flare, there are far better things to taking tests than cheating. I can help show you that even studying can be fun.” Twilight said. “Good luck with that! I hope you do better than Pinkie showing me that watching paint dry can be fun.” I said. A cutaway shows me watching paint dry with Pinkie. I just sat there emotionless, and Pinkie sat next to me, smiling and giggling as she watched. “I don’t get it. How is this funny?” “Shhh! This is my favorite part!” Pinkie said. “I got better things to do than this. Later, Pinkie.” I said as I walked away. “Huh?” Pinkie asked as she was still focused on the paint. When I got home, I turned on the TV and turned on one of my favorite shows: the SMPTE color bars. “Oh cool, the Rainbow Show! Nice! I hope this is the episode where red cheats on yellow! I wonder if my other favorite show is on?” I asked as I changed the channel and saw static. “YAY! Snow!” I cheered. The cutaway ends. And so, Twilight and I started studying together. Twilight got her chalkboard ready and she stood right in front of me with me while I was sitting on a school desk in the middle of the room. “Now, Flare, are you ready?” “I still have a question.” I said as I raised my hoof. “Yes, Flare?” Twilight asked as she pointed at me. “Did you steal this desk from the schoolhouse or something?” I asked. “Wha- NO! Cheerilee let me… borrow it.” Twilight said nervously. “Because I remember sitting on this desk that one time I was acting like a child again and I went to the school, this is the same exact desk!” I said. “Any other questions, Flare?” Twilight asked. “Yeah, that teacher’s desk in front of you where you’re sitting at. That looks like Cheerilee’s desk.” I pointed out. “It’s not Cheerilee’s desk.” Twilight said. “Are you sure? Cause I can see an apple on that desk too with a note that says, ‘Cheerilee, you’re the best teacher ever. Love, Truffle Shuffle’.” I pointed out. “Do you have any other questions that don’t involve me ‘stealing’ anything from the schoolhouse?” Twilight asked with an attitude. “Yeah, why are you using a chalkboard? Everypony knows dry-erase boards are the way of the future.” I suggested. “Can we get to work now?” Twilight asked. “Hang on. I need to observe the room for anypony suspicious.” I said as I looked around the room. Twilight started getting a little concerned about that. “What are you doing?” Twilight asked. After I took one more look around, I whispered to Twilight, “Every homeroom class I’m in, there’s always a pony shooting spit-balls at me. I want to make sure nopony else is in the room with a straw or loose paper.” “Flare, I STRONGLY doubt there’ll be a pony wanting to shoot spit balls at you.” Twilight said in an aggravated tone. “Shhhhh!” I shushed her, and then I whispered, “Don’t let them know I’m onto them.” “Is that all the questions you have?” Twilight asked. “Yes, ma’am.” I said as I smiled at her and folded my hooves together on my desk. “Excellent. Now, the first thing I’ll lecture you about is stock.” Twilight started. “Now, with stock… you need to-“ “OW! MY EYE!” I yelled as I covered my left eye. “What happened?” Twilight asked. “SOMEPONY THREW A FAUST-FORSAKEN SPIT-BALL IN MY EYE! OW!” I cried out. “Who? There’s nopony else here.” Twilight corrected me. Spike quickly hid his straw and started to awkwardly walk away, whistling. “Let that be a lesson to you Twilight: a spit-ball to the eye is no laughing matter.” I advised her. “Trust me, I’ll remember that.” Twilight said as she used her magic to heal my eye. I blinked my left eye a bit and smiled. “Thanks.” “You’re welcome, Flare.” Twilight said as she continued the lecture. She started writing on the board as she continued. “Now, with stocks. The first thing I’ll lecture you on is stock exchanges. Now, a stock exchange is a place to trade stocks. Companies may want to-“ Twilight paused after she heard my desk move. “Sorry, Twilight. I can’t see the board that well.” I said. “It’s ok, Flare.” Twilight said as she continued. “Now, companies may want to get their stock listed on a stock exchange. Other stocks may be traded ‘over the counter’, that is, through a dealer. A large company will usually-“ Twilight paused as I moved my desk again. “Still can’t see well. I’m blind when it comes to far away words.” I said. Twilight was silent for a moment, and then she continued again; “A large company will usually have its stock listed on many- Flare, why are you sitting on my desk?” Twilight asked as I was sitting right in front of her, right on her desk. “You mean Cheerilee’s desk?” I corrected her. Twilight sighs. “Are you sure you can see the board well enough?” “I think so.” I nodded. “Good.” Twilight said as she continued. “Market participants include individual retail investors and traders, institutional investors such as mutual funds, banks, insurance companies and hedge funds, and also publicly traded corporations trading in their own shares. Some studies have suggested-“ as Twilight was continuing, I slowly moved my head closer and closer to the board until my face was flat on it. Twilight stopped as she saw me with my face right on the board. “Flare… are you sure that will help your eyesight?” “Positive! I can see it well enough now, sista.” I said. “Maybe it’s best if we try a different sort of lecture.” Twilight said. “Ok.” I said as I moved my head away from the chalk board, and I detached my face from it like it was sticking on it and I was trying to get myself unstuck, and as I was walking away from the board, I spotted one of the desk drawers opened and there’s an active phone inside. “Twilight, are you stealing this content from Wikipedia?!” “NO!” Twilight yelled as she kicked the desk drawer shut. “I am not plagiarizing! That’s just silly.” “Are you sure?” I asked. “Because the content you were just talking about in stock markets matched what the stock market page in Wikipedia sai-“ Twilight bleeped me out and started pushing me. “UHHH, that’s enough, Flare. Let’s… go to our next portion of our studying.” Twilight insisted as the two of us went to sit down on her desk (her actual desk), and she said happily, “Alright, Flare! The time has come for me to show you my favorite type of study method!” “Cheat?” I asked. “No… FLASHCARDS!” Twilight said excitedly as she took out flashcards from her desk. “And I use flashcards to cheat with.” I said. “Well, you’re not cheating on THIS test!” Twilight said. “On this side of the card, I’m going to put a question, and on this side of the card, I’m going to write the answer. I’m going to ask you a question, and you will give me the answer.” “How about we do it the Jeopardy way?” I suggested. “YES! I like your style, Flare! I love Jeopardy!” Twilight said excitedly. “Good… cause I don’t, but I do like the theme song.” I said as I started humming the Jeopardy theme song. “Ok, Flare. I made five categories for you: supply, budgets, psychology, cleanliness, and to make things a little more interesting: fictional vending.” Twilight said. “Alrighty then… umm… let’s see… ummmmm… sigh… ok, I’ll take fictional vending for 200.” I said. “Ok. Just to let you know, Spike made up the fictional vending category.” Twilight said. “Good man!” I said. “Now, I’ll give you the answer, and you have to give me the question.” Twilight explained. “This video game character has vending machines out in the badlands and doesn’t allow refunds or he’ll kill you.” “Who is Marcus Kincaid?” I asked. “Very good, Flare! You score 200!” Twilight said excitedly. “Ok, now choose another category.” “I choose fictional vending for 400.” I said. “Fictional again? Alright, if you say so.” Twilight said as she read the flashcard. “In Bioshock, this is one type of vending machine that isn’t seen at all in the second game but is seen in the first one.” “What is the U-Invent?” I asked. “That’s 400 for you, Flare! Excellent job!” Twilight said. “Ok now choose another category. “Fictional for 500!” I said. “Mind if I make a suggestion and use a different category?” Twilight asked. “Nope! Fictional!” I said excitedly as I used my flank to jump up and down on my seat. Twilight sighs and said, “Ok then.” After a few minutes, I answered all the fictional vending questions and I won each of those and gained 1500 points. “Alright Flare, that was the last fictional vending question (thank Celestia), now you have to choose another one.” “I choose fictional!” I said excitedly. “You can’t do fictional anymore. You answered all of them.” Twlight said. “Awwww!” I whined. “Alright fine… umm… FICTIONAL!” “Flare, be serious.” Twilight said with an attitude. “I don’t think I’m gonna know the other ones.” I said. “Relax. Start off with a category at 100 points. It’s the easiest.” Twilight said. “Ugh! SIGH!” I yelled. “Alright, fine. I choose psychology for 100.” “Good! This one should be easy.” Twilight started as she started reading the card. “The soda machine ran out of ice and a customer is complaining about it.” “Why would a customer complain about the soda machine? The soda machine is behind the counter. This isn’t a fast-food joint I’m running, it’s an actual restaurant.” I said. “You should know this one though.” Twilight said. “Ok, what is - you shouldn’t be behind the counter?” I asked. “Sorry, Flare, but the question I was looking for is… what is refilling the soda machine with ice?” Twilight said. “I don’t run a fast food joint, Twilight. How the Wizard of Strength was I supposed to know that question?” I asked. “Don’t you go to food joints at all and complain that the ice machine ran out of ice?” Twilight asked. “It’s not my job to refill them though.” I said. Twilight gives me a funny look. “Ok, let’s try another one.” “Supplies for 100.” I said. “This is the amount of time you have to refill your supplies.” Twilight said. “What is 9 AM?” I asked. “Nope. The correct question was: what is a week?” Twilight corrected me. “You weren’t being pacific enough.” I said as I said ‘specific’ wrong. “Pacific?” Twilight asked. “Spike asked the same thing once before. I can’t say it the right away.” I explained. “Ok so you want me to be more specific then. How?” Twilight asked. “Well… I had the feeling you wanted me to say what time do I normally get my supplies for my shop, and normally at 9 AM is when I refill my shop, every Monday of every week.” I said. “I was asking how long does for how long you should refill your shop.” Twilight said. “Well, you said it wrong, so it’s not my fault.” I said. “Alright, fine, I won’t count it. What’s the next category of your choice?” Twilight asked. “Break time for 5.” I said as I took out a garlic roll from my satchel and started eating it. Twilight sighs. After a long day of studying, I was finally ready to take my test. I was just about to leave Twilight’s house, but first, I wanted to take a moment to have a conversation with her before I leave. “Well, Flare, it took some patience-“ Twilight started. “And some pain to the eye.” I added. “But you did pretty well on your studying, and I believe you’ll do well on it…. WITHOUT cheating.” Twilight said. “Aww.” I whined. “Don’t worry, Flare. I know you’ll be able to do it, I have complete confidence in you.” Twilight smiled at me and said. “Well this study session has been fun, that’s for sure! Probably almost as fun as Police Appreciation Week!” I said. A cutaway shows a police officer leaning on his carriage and eating a donut, when just then, a bunch of civilian ponies burst out into the open and started whacking the police officer with nightsticks. “OW! OW! HEY! WHAT GIVES?!” the officer yelled. “Happy Police Appreciation Day, officer!” a pony said excitedly. “Police Appreciation Day: the day you treat a police officer how they treat you.” Another pony said. “Aw thank you!” the officer said happily. “SHUT UP!” the second pony yelled as they continued to beat him up, and then one of the ponies places a gun next to the officer. “Look out! He’s got a gun!” The cutaway ends. Just before I was about to leave, there was a knock on the door. Twilight used her magic to open it – it was Blaze and Rainbow Dash Goldheart. “Rainbow Dash!” Twilight said excitedly. “Blaze!” I said excitedly, and then I said to Twilight, “Ok, now we switch. You say Blaze and I say Rainbow Dash.” “I’m telling you Rainbow, we have to accept the fact that they just can’t LET you be a Wonderbolt.” Blaze said to her. “I saved their lives once! They saw my awesome flying, and they expect me to give an initiation?! That’s just stupid!” Rainbow yelled. “What’s wrong?” Twilight asked. “Blaze here is a Wonderbolt, so he should let me become a Wonderbolt on the spot!” Rainbow yelled. “I’m sorry, Rainbow, but to be a Wonderbolt, you need to pass an initiation and an entrance exam.” Blaze said. “Why exams?! Wonderbolts don’t take tests.” Rainbow yelled. “It’s not even a writing test though, it’s a flight test! You can’t go into the academy unless you pass the entrance score.” Blaze explained. “Pfffft!” Rainbow raspberried at Blaze. “I don’t need an entrance exam! The Wonderbolts KNOW I’m the best! YOU know I’m the best! Twilight and Flare here know I’m the best! Go ahead Twilight and Flare; TELL HIM!” “I really don’t like picking sides.” I said nervously. “Well… I must agree with Rainbow that she IS indeed the best!” Twilight admitted. “HA! See, Blaze?! Even Twilight knows it!” Rainbow yelled in Blaze’s face. “But I agree with Blaze that you must take that entrance exam if you want to be a Wonderbolt.” Twilight added. “HA! IN YOUR FACE, RAINBOW!” Blaze yelled at her. “YOU’RE A FREAKSHOW!” Rainbow yelled at him. Blaze gasps. “Excuse me, everypony… I have something to say.” I started. “Let’s just all agree that us unicorns don’t have to worry about anything Wonderbolt-related. Alright? Kay thanks bye, I’m leaving.” I said as I was about to walk out. “Whoa, whoa, whoa! What does that supposed to mean?” Blaze asked in an insulted tone. “Only a pegasus can be a Wonderbolt. Twilight and I on the other hoof are unicorns, soooo; I really have no idea why you’re telling us this. Trying to rub it in our faces because the pegasi get their own flying factions but us unicorns don’t have jack for a military faction in our own races?” I asked. “Now hold on a minute, Flare, just because the pegasi have their own type of military faction doesn’t mean you can’t join the military in general. Why don’t you sign up to be a royal guard?” Blaze asked. “I’m not saying I WANT to join the military; I’m just saying… why don’t unicorns have a faction of their own? Come to think of it… why not earth ponies either?!” I complained. “Or dragons!” Spike complained. “Noooo, Spike, dragons don’t have military factions, they have colonies. They’re not even part of an empire or a republic. Why isn’t Equestria a republic?” I asked. “Well, I’m sorry, man, but it would seem that pegasi have certain talents unicorns don’t have, which what made the Wonderbolts possible in the first place.” Blaze said. “So how about I just become a pegasus?” I asked. “YOU a pegasus?! HA! Yeah, that’s a laugh, Flare!” Rainbow teased. “I don’t even think TWILIGHT would make a good pegasus!” “Now hold on a minute, Rainbow, what makes you think we won’t become good pegasi?” Twilight asked with an attitude. “Uhh, because you’re unicorns. Trust me, Twilight, I wouldn’t be a good unicorn I must admit.” Rainbow said. “Well, I suppose you’re right, Rainbow.” Twilight agreed. “I don’t. I could be an AWESOME pegasus!” I said. “Are you sure about that, man? I’d learn to be a unicorn MUCH faster than you learning how to be a pegasus!” Blaze laughed and said. “I bet I can do one of your ‘shoop da whoops’ in my sleep!” “Brah, trust me, it really isn’t easy to do a shoop da whoop. You think I can just make one when I want it? No, I need the energy for it and the emotion, which is why I yell ‘IMMA FIRIN MAH LAZOR’ before I actually fire.” I explained. “Doing spells isn’t easy at first, like it’s not easy to flirt with mares.” A cutaway shows me walking towards Daisy as she was tending her garden. “Oh, hi Flare! How’s it going?” she asked. I was really nervous; I wanted to ask her out, but the only thing I could think of was saying the word “Banana?”, but just then, a bunch of minions storm out of nowhere yelling “BANANA! BANANA! BANANA! BANANA! BANANA!” trampling all over me as they were searching all over me for that banana that I don’t have. The cutaway ends. “Well, dude, flying isn’t a walk in the park at first either.” Blaze explained. “Oh yeah? Well, if you think you’ll learn to be a proicorn much faster than me being a pegapro, why don’t we switch pony races for a day and see!” I suggested. “Dude, you think anypony is going to know how to do that?” Blaze asked. “Actually, Princess Celestia gave me a book of advanced spells recently, and switching pony races is one of them, but I can only doing that if two different pony races are standing next to eachother, and to avoid angry fans, Flare, you’ll no longer have your horn, and Blaze, you’ll no longer have your wings.” Twilight explained. The both of us gasped. “Aww, but I like my horn! It’s nice and pointy! Perfect for poking other pony’s butts.” I whined as I tapped on the tip of my horn. “And how am I supposed to get home without my wings?!” Blaze complained. “Don’t worry, we’ll figure something out. Now the both of you hold still. I’m not sure what’s going to happen. I haven’t tested this spell yet.” Twilight said as her horn started glowing. “Wait, shouldn’t you test it on something else before testing it on us?!” I suggested nervously. “Too late!” Twilight said as she used her magic on us. Blaze’s wings suddenly detach from his body, as well as my horn with my body, and then my horn pops right into Blaze’s forehead and his wings attempt to get attached to my back, but it couldn’t get in because my vest was in the way, so Rainbow lowers my vest so my wings can go through. The magic fades away and now I am a pegasus and Blaze is a unicorn. “Whoa! Awesome!” Rainbow said excitedly. “The deed is done! You both switched pony races and now Flare is a pegasus and Blaze is a unicorn.” Twilight said. “Wow, nice job stating the obvious, Twilight.” I said sarcastically to her. “Alright so how are we going to work this out, brah? We going to make a bet or something?” Blaze asked. “Do we have to? Gambling is wrong.” I said. “So if we’re not going to make a bet, why else did we switch races?” Blaze asked. “Because you want to prove to me you’re going to be a better unicorn than I am a Pegasus.” I explained. “Yeah and I was going to make a bet about it.” Blaze added. “Oh.” I said. “What? You don’t want to? We don’t have to.” Blaze asked. “No, no, I don’t want to spoil this for you. We’ll make a bet.” I said. “I’m opened to anything; except for crimes, I’m not doing crimes, or eat peanut butter, or preform stupid stunts on a carriage like some stupid teenager, or-“ “Alright, I get your point dude.” Blaze said. “Ok so, we’ll make this fair. We’ll try to become at least decent with our new abilities. By the end of the day tomorrow, we’ll test out our skills in a duel.” “So what are the rules?” I asked. “No cheating.” Blaze said. “Crud! This just isn’t my day, is it?!” I complained. “Yeah so, no steroids, or potions, or machinery, or spells to make you better your new ability. Although, you can ask for advice.” Blaze explained. “Awesome! I can’t wait to teach Flare everything he needs to know about being an awesome flyer!” Rainbow Dash said as she placed her hoof around me excitedly. “And I can teach Blaze a bunch of basic spells to help him out.” Twilight offered. “So it’s settled then! So what happens if we win or lose?” I asked and then I said to myself, “Oh please if I lose, don’t make me read Rainbow Factory again!” “WHAT?!” Rainbow yelled. “No, no! Flare, I’ll NEVER ask you to read that story! In fact, I’d forbid it!” Blaze said shockingly. “I don’t know which story is worse… Rainbow Factory or Cupcakes.” Rainbow said in a weak tone as she limped around on the floor. “I really don’t like the fandom sometimes.” I said to Blaze. “Me neither.” Blaze said. “I try to stay away from Deviantart as much as I can so I wouldn’t see any of those ridiculous fanarts of my friends and I. Ugh! I really don’t want to talk about it!” Twilight explained in a disgusted tone. “So Blaze, what happens if either of us wins?” I asked. “The winner gets to have a delicious feast made by the greatest chefs in Ponyville, free of charge!” Blaze said. “So I guess that means I’m cooking then.” I said excitedly. “Nope, sorry man, because the loser will have to wear this maid outfit and serve the winner throughout the whole feast!” Blaze explained as he grabbed a maid’s outfit out of his… I dunno, pocket, and showed it to me. “And do you happen to carry that maid outfit with you wherever you go?” I asked mischievously. “Wha-NO!” Blaze blushed as he threw the maid outfit aside. “It’s… it’s actually Rainbow’s.” “No it’s not, you liar!” Rainbow defended herself. “So we have a deal man?” Blaze asked as he took out his hoof, wanting me to bump it. I spat on my hoof and gave him a bro-hoof. “Deal!” “Eww! Why did you do that?” Blaze asked. “I see AppleJack and Rainbow do it all the time when they bet on something.” I explained. “I know, it’s gross, and I’m starting to think it was a bad idea.” “Hey it was either that or cut our hooves and make a deal like blood sisters.” Rainbow said. “Or you can just… you know… hoof each other without… sharing DNA?” I suggested. “Oh Flare, Flare, Flare.” Rainbow shook her head. “You still have much to learn about friendship.” “In this case… so do I.” Twilight said. I’m going to let Blaze narrate the next part: And so, it was time for Flare and I to start our bet to see who’s better at our opposite pony races. I must admit, I’m a little nervous, but I do have confidence in myself. You know the kind of pony who’s also half-dragon and is called a freakshow from everypony at school and wants to kill them with his beasty hooves? Well that’s me. I mean it, for those who call me a freak, I get so angry and I want to just… gnaw my teeth onto their necks and watch them suffer after calling me a freak! OH YEAH! THEY’RE GOING TO FEEL MY WRATH! Oh… umm… sorry about that. Please don’t call the cops now. Oh, and I’m also a Wonderbolt and married to Rainbow Dash. My name is Blaze. Ok I’m back to narrating again. And so I was exiting Twilight’s house with Rainbow Dash so she can train me to fly. As I was walking out, my new wings were dragging on the ground. “Ok, Flare, I’m going to teach you everything you need to know about being a Pegasus!” Rainbow said excitedly. “I already knew that. Tell me what I don’t know.” I instructed her. “Alright.” Rainbow said as she flew in the air. “The best thing about being a Pegasus is being able so soar in the air and feel the wind in your face!” she explained as she was zooming from side to side really fast. “You have to feel your inner dare-devil release! You have to KNOW you’re able to fly really well in order to be able to fly really well.” “Sounds simple enough. It’s just like magic!” I nodded. “Yeah, only better!” Rainbow said. “You were never a unicorn, so you have NO idea which one is better.” I corrected her. “Ok, first thing’s first: how about you stop dragging your new wings on the ground and start flapping them?” Rainbow instructed me. “You see, the key is to knowing how to control your wings. That’s pretty much the only way you can fly.” “Uh huh, and which door does that key unlock?” I asked. “The door to feeling alive, Flare.” Rainbow said as she placed her hoof around me and tapped on my stomach with her other hoof. “The door to feeling alive!” “I already feel alive.” I corrected her. “I’m not dead, am I?” “Ok, let’s just skip the metaphors and get to the flapping! Come on, Flare, flap those things!” Rainbow instructed me. “Kay kay.” I said as I just stood there with my wings still being dragged on the ground for several seconds. “Flare, are you going to move your wings or what?” Rainbow asked. “Oh yeah, I was meaning to ask… how do I move them?” I asked. “Like how you move your hooves or maybe how you control your magic.” Rainbow advised. “Don’t put magic into this, sista! You have NO idea how to use magic! Allow me to demonstrate.” I started. “How are you going to demonstrate if you don’t have a horn?” Rainbow asked. “Huh?” I asked curiously as I felt my forehead for my horn but it wasn’t there. “Oh that’s right, Blaze has my horn now. But wait, if these are Blaze’s wings, shouldn’t they be the best already?” “Oh Flare, Flare, Flare.” Rainbow said as she shook her head. “Having the wings doesn’t make you good; it’s the will and courage of being able to fly. You have to feel it within you!” “So you want me to eat my wings?” I asked. “Wha- NO!” Rainbow sighed as she landed right next to me. “Look, flying is not hard. It’s like riding a bike!” “I haven’t learned how to ride my bike until I was 18.” I corrected her. “Regardless, even a newborn foal can move their wings! All you have to do is just move them. See?” Rainbow demonstrated by flapping her wings around. “It’s not hard at all!” “Well it is to me!” I said. “Here, let me help you.” Rainbow offered as she picked up my wings and started flapping them around for me. “See? It’s not so hard!” “It’s only not hard because you’re moving them.” I corrected her. Rainbow sighs and said, “This is really not going to end well, like when Derpy volunteered to assist Trixie in her act.” A cutaway shows The Great and Powerful Trixie preforming a show in front of a live audience along with Derpy sitting on a chair in front of her. “Witness all and watch the Great and Powerful Trixie at work! Without unicorn magic, I will put this pony right to sleep!” “Ooooo!” the audience said in excitement. Trixie faces Derpy and says, “Look into my eyes, little pony… or…. Kinda look into my eyes, and pay close attention to my voice.” Derpy’s eyes start to turn into little vortexes and she became cursed under Trixie’s control. “You are getting very sleepy, little pony, very… very… very… sleepy.” Derpy’s eyes shut and Derpy falls right to sleep on the spot. “And now… once I clop my right hoof on the stage, this pony will awake and imagine everypony on fire!” Trixie said. She clops her right hoof on the floor and Derpy’s eyes awake; she then stands up from the chair, looks at the audience, and she starts laughing like a maniac. The entire audience was concerned over why she was laughing evilly. “Uhhh… da ta?” Trixie said confusingly. The cutaway ends. Meanwhile, inside the library, Twilight was assisting Blaze on how to use his newly formed unicorn powers. “Alright, Mr. Goldheart.” “Please… Mr. Goldheart is my father. Call me Mr. Second Lieutenant Blaze Goldheart the Great and Powerful of the Wonderbolts… esquire!” Blaze insisted. “How about just Blaze?” Twilight asked. “That works too!” Blaze said excitedly. “Ok! So, time to learn what means to be a unicorn!” Twilight said excitedly. “I can’t wait!” Blaze said excitedly. “Now, Blaze, to learn the basics of unicorn magic, you must fire empty your mind of anything negative from your past. Only positive and friendship will help you control your powers. If you concentrate your thoughts on hate or anything negative, your magic may become chaotic.” Twilight explained. “You mean like Discord?” Blaze asked. “Not that kind of chaotic. I mean you can cause severe damage that way. It all depends if you know how to use the magic. To learn the magic, you must control it.” Twilight explained. “Controlling powers isn’t easy, Twilight. Trust me on that.” Blaze said. “What do you mean?” Twilight asked. “Uhh… I’d rather not say at this time.” Blaze said. “Ok. So, how about we learn a basic spell? Levitation.” Twilight suggested. “Wingardium leviosa?” Blaze asked. “Yes, wingardium leviosa.” Twilight repeated. “Hang on; I don’t have to say the words do I? Because I don’t want Miss Know-It-Alls to be correcting me. No offense, Twilight.” Blaze said. “None take- HEY!” Twilight yelled. “Sorry. So how do we levitate?” Blaze asked. “Well, levitation magic works like hooves. If something is too heavy for you, then you won’t be able to pick up.” Twilight said. “No problem, Twilight! I am pretty strong!” Blaze said as he flexed for Twilight and he kisses his muscles. Twilight gives him a funny look. “Umm… actually… levitation has its own strength. Not the strength of your hooves, but the strength of your heart. The magic flows around there.” Twilight explained. “So the strength of my magic is the strength of my emotions and personality?” Blaze asked. “Exactly, Blaze! Exactly! You have a wonderful personality, Blaze. You remind me a lot of your wife in a way in that sense.” Twilight said. “Thanks! I’m not sure if that’s supposed to be a compliment or not, but thanks!” Blaze said. “No problem! Now, let’s start light. Try to levitate this feather on the floor.” Twilight instructed him. “Sounds simple enough!” Blaze said. He leaned his head and aimed his horn directly onto the feather. Blaze’s horn started to glow and sparkle a bit. Blaze was struggling a bit though; he began to grunt and wheeze, and not just that, he was grunting and wheezing too! Yes, you can grunt and wheeze twice! Blaze tried all his strength to pick up the feather, but then he saw the feather floating off the ground. “I did it, Twilight! HA! I did it!” Blaze said excitedly, but his excitement went away when he saw the feather moving around funny, and then he found out Spike was carrying a stick and the feather was tied on a string connected to the stick. Spike chuckled as he was waving the stick around which caused the feather to move around. “SPIKE!” Blaze yelled. “What? I was trying to help!” Spike said as he was chuckling still. “Ok Blaze, now let’s see if we can do it WITHOUT Spike’s ‘help’.” Twilight instructed him. “Ok.” Blaze said as he aimed his horn at the feather again. He huffed and puffed and blew the house down. No, not really. I just wanted to say that. So he grunted and wheezed and he tried all he could to activate his magic, but it wouldn’t even spark. Blaze collapsed on the ground in exhaustion. “Unicorn magic is a difficult procedure. I wasn’t good at it at first either.” Twilight said. “I know how the story goes, Twilight.” Blaze complained. Meanwhile, back with Rainbow Dash and me, Rainbow continued to teach me what I needed to know about flying, and so far, I still haven’t even been able to control them yet. “Flare, it is so simple! How can you not know how to even move them?!” Rainbow complained. “You think unicorns would know how to use wings quickly?” I asked. “I bet if Twilight grew some wings, she wouldn’t be able to move them right away either.” “Don’t give up, Flare. You’re just not trying hard enough. Moving your wings is no different from moving your hooves. Just move them!” Rainbow instructed me. I kept attempting to move my wings. I grunted, wheezed, and……… grunted, but eventually I was able to lift my wings up. “HA! You did it, Flare! You did it!” “Cool! I knew I could do it! I dunno how it’s easy for you; these wings are heavy for me!” I said. “You’ll get used to it, and soon you’ll be in the air in no time at all!” Rainbow said. “If I was gonna be up in there in no time, I would’ve been in the air by now.” I corrected her. “But aren’t you in the air now?” Rainbow asked. “WHAT?!” I yelled out as I looked down, but how foolish of me, I was still on the ground. “HA! Mage’a look!” Rainbow teased. “Yes, I know, I am on the ground. Look!” I pointed to the ground. “Yes, I see that.” Rainbow looked down and said. “HA! Mage’a look!” I teased her. “No, that only works if it’s a lie.” Rainbow corrected me. “You’re so stubborn, Rainbow. I’m not playing this game with you anymore.” I complained. “I guess you know how I feel when you joke with me.” Rainbow said. “Oh c’mon, my jokes are harmless! That’s cruel!” I corrected her. Rainbow just shook her head. “Let’s just continue. You are improving with your newly formed wings. Let’s keep it up, and you’ll be able to win Blaze’s bet yet. Can’t wait to see him in that maid outfit!” Rainbow laughed and said. Back with Blaze and Twilight, all Blaze was able to get accomplished was to fuse a spark out of his horn. “I’m glad you’re starting to be able to control your magic, Blaze, but it’s time we put that little magic you have so far to the test.” Twilight said. “I want you to- “Do a summon charm? Accio?” Blaze interrupted. “No.” Twilight said. “I want you to-“ “Water making spell? Aguamenti?” Blaze interrupted again. “No!” Twilight said a little more angrier. “I want you to-“ “Alohomora? Unlock?” Blaze asked. “You’re a big fan of Harry Potter, aren’t you?” Twilight asked as she shook her head. “I like many of British entertainment!” Blaze said. “Anyways, no. I want you to… fix these glasses.” Twilight said as she threw some cracked glasses on the table. “Otherwise known as Oculus Reparo.” “Seriously, Twilight? This is the best you can offer me?” Blaze complained. “You’re not yet ready for more complicated spells, Blaze. Like flying (as I know of), magic takes a lot of patience and practice.” Twilight said. “I know, but… this is ridiculous!” Blaze complained. “Well, luckily for you, we’re not doing the Ridiculous spell.” Twilight teased. “I swear, Twilight, I sometimes can’t understand your personality, like sometimes I don’t get if pictures are real or not.” Blaze said. A cutaway shows a picture of Gabe Newell with three fingers up. It’s up to you to find out if that picture is fake or not. The cutaway ends. “Now fix these glasses, and you’ll be ready for the next level of your training.” Twilight instructed Blaze. He pretty much didn’t have a choice. To win his bet, he must get this done. Blaze aimed his horn towards the glasses and his horn started to spark a bit. Blaze had his doubts and he tried with all his strength to fix these glasses, but he had the confidence to do so, and therefore, he was successful. “You did it, Blaze! You did it!” “Wow! I didn’t think I would be able to, but I did!” Blaze said excitedly. “Magic can be easy, Blaze! Anything can be easy if you have the heart for it.” Twilight said. “I have a really good feeling about this, Twilight! Better get your camera ready because Flare in a maid dress is serving us food tonight!” Blaze said excitedly. And so we can speed things up a bit, I’ll just tell you what’s going with the training without dialogue. The next part of training Rainbow was teaching me was just to float off the ground, hover a bit, and touch back down. Rainbow was first giving me an example, and then I was about to follow along. I flapped my wings a bit and I started to hover successfully. We both smiled until, that is, until I spun and started hovering upside down, and then I touched back down by landing on my head. I sincerely hope that doesn’t give me a contusion. Back with Blaze and Twilight, Twilight was giving Blaze an example by showing him how to turn pages of a book using magic. Blaze nodded his head and did the same successfully. Twilight smiled at him in his success, although the book magically ignites itself into flames. After a few moments, Spike bursts in with a fire extinguisher and takes out the fire, but Blaze and Twilight gets blasted in the process and now their faces are now foamy and shaped like mustaches and beards. Spike starts laughing at them and the two just glared at him. Twilight wants him to try again so she brings out another book. Blaze activates his horn and attempts to turn the pages of the book, and he did it successful, and the book did not ignite again, but as they thought it was a complete success, the book started coming to life and started chomping with its book pages and the book starts to chase Blaze and Twilight through the room. Back with Rainbow and I, Rainbow was flying through a couple of hoops real fast while she carries a horse-shoe on her hoof. I was flying over at the starting line (having a rough time flying though) and she passes the horse-shoe to me so I can fly through the hoops next. I take the hoof and then…… I eat it because it wasn’t a real horse-shoe, it was a chocolate one. Rainbow just glares at me and gives me another horse-shoe, and well…. I ate that too. Rainbow gives herself a facehoof, flies over to the Famous Hoofwear store in town and buys some real horse-shoes from there. She flies back in just a couple of seconds and gives me a real horse-shoe. The chocolate ones were less heavy because they didn’t have me being tilted to the side unlike this horse-shoe. I may be improving on my flying but I’m no pro yet. So I flew over to the hoops and tried to go through them, but I kept getting knocked into them and nearly fell. I eventually made it to the end, even though it took me 1/10th of the time Rainbow took to get to the other side, but it was an improvement. Right after, I ate the real horse-shoe. Back with Blaze and Twilight, they were getting ready for the next lesson. Twilight was showing Blaze how to use magic to create water out of thin-air. Twilight uses her horn and stirs it towards an empty bowl to create water. Blaze was pretty impressed and he couldn’t wait to give it a try himself. So Blaze inserted his horn into another empty bowl and began to stir. A liquid substance did appear but it was yellow. Blaze and Twilight were a bit confused on what that liquid was, but the answer was later revealed after Blaze sneezes and some of his Draconian fire breath gets into the yellow liquid substance and then it ignites into flames. Huge flames! Spike ran over to the fire and, once again, used a fire extinguisher to take out the fire. The foam also affected Blaze and Twilight but instead of mustaches and beards, it was a clown wig on Blaze’s head and a pipe on Blaze’s mouth. Spike started to laugh again. Just then, the laughter stopped as all three of them were being chased by the live chomping book again. Back with Rainbow and I, Rainbow was demonstrating that being able to fly, I must keep balance, so Rainbow flies up into the air, spins around, and was able to land safely without being dizzy. When it was my turn, I refused to go because I was busy eating horse-shoes, but I promised I’d do it later. Back with Twilight and Blaze, they were still being chased by the chomping book. Blaze stops and faces the book and uses his magic on it, thinking it would be stopped, but all he was able to do is help it grow sharp and pointy teeth. The book was more dangerous than ever. After a little while of chasing, Twilight used her magic on the book and trapped it in a cage. Twilight nodded at Blaze and smiled. “Blaze…” she said. “Flare…” Rainbow said to me. “I think you’re ready!” they both said at the same time, window to window. “Hey do I get a window?” I asked as a window me appears right below them. “What’s this all about?” Blaze asked as his window appears right on top of our’s. “I dunno, but I hope it doesn’t start up any fires.” Spike said as a window of him appeared in between Blaze and Twilight on the left side. “RAARGH! RAARGH!” the chomping book growled as a window of it appears between mine and Rainbow’s side. Right afterwords, the Brady Bunch theme song plays as Alice from the TV show appears right at the center of it all. “Who’s she?” Spike asked as she looked over at Alice’s window. “She better not be my replacement.” And so, the time has come for the ultimate showdown, of ultimate destiny! Good guys and bad guys and explosions, as far as the eye can see! And only one will survive, I wonder who it would be? This is the ultimate showdown, of ultimate destiny! Love that song! If you haven’t listened to it yet, go do so, but don’t listen to it’s…. parody. Anyways, let us continue. Over at Sweet Apple Acres, the Mane Six, as well as the Noble Six, the CMCs, and the Apple family went over to the fields to watch Blaze and I battle of the races. “Snacks! Get your nice delicious snacks here!” AppleJack cried out as she was giving out some apple treats. “Yeah, you got any horse-shoes? Flare says they’re pretty good.” Crystal requested. “Sure, here ya go.” AppleJack said as she gave Crystal some actual horse-shoes to eat. “I still wonder how she’s were able to do it.” Aqua said. “Do what, Aqua?” Apple Bloom asked. “How she’s able to switch pony races that easily.” Aqua said. “Twilight is an awesome unicorn! I don’t think I’ve ever seen a unicorn so awesome!” Scootaloo said excitedly. Sweetie Belle glares at Scootaloo and clears her throat. “Oh calm down, Sweetie Belle. You don’t even know how to work that thing.” She pointed out as she pokes her horn. “Don’t worry, Sweetie Belle. Ya’ll learn eventually. It didn’t take me until I was 8 to learn my magic.” Aqua whispered to Sweetie Belle. “I’m 10.” Sweetie Belle corrected him. “Oh… well… better late than never, right?” Aqua asked. “Great! Now my cutie mark is the least of my problems.” Sweetie Belle complained. “Smooth, Aqua. Real smooth.” Psyche nodded. “WOO! This is gonna be so much fun!” Pinkie cheered. “I’ve always wanted to see a battle to the DEATH!” “Wait, what?” Aqua asked. “Pinkie, this isn’t a battle to the death.” Psyche corrected her. “I didn’t say this was one. I just said I’ve always wanted to see one.” Pinkie corrected him, laughed, and patted him on the head. “Need to learn to listen sometimes, Psychey!” “Hey, hey! Don’t mess up my hair!” Psyche yelled. “Now, Blaze. Are you alright?” Twilight asked. “Yes, I’m alright, Twilight.” Blaze said. “You all ready? You all energized?” Twilight asked. “Yes, Twilight, I’m all ready.” Blaze nodded. “You have all your magic ready?” Twilight asked. “Yes.” Blaze nodded. “You know what spells to use?” “Yes.” “You have nothing stressful in your head?” “Yes.” “Did you remember to eat breakfast this morning?” “Yes.” “Lunch?” “Yes.” “Supper?” “Yes.” “Did you brush your teeth?” “Yes.” “Do you hate Doctor Who?” “Yes- I MEAN NO!” Blaze yelled. “Just testing you, Blaze. You have to remain focused.” Twilight said. “Right.” Blaze agreed. “Alright Flare, I want you to be awesome!” Rainbow said. “No.” I said. “Why not?” Rainbow asked. “Cause you’re already awesome?” “No cause I’m not awesome.” I said. “I’m awesome POSSUM.” Rainbow sighs and said, “Alright then, you’re ‘awesome possum’.” “Isn’t that what I just said?” I asked. “Just do everything I taught you. You come a long way.” Rainbow said. “Took a while though.” I said. “Oh yes… it took… a very long while.” Rainbow said. “But it was worth it, right?” I asked. “Let us hope so, dude. Let us hope so.” Rainbow nodded. So, Blaze and I stepped onto the field where the two of us are suppose to have the showdown. The two of us glared at eachother, gave eachother mischievous looks, and showed our toughness to eachother. Blaze spits on the ground, I blew spit bubbles, Blaze uses a grindstone on his horn, I iron my wings, Blaze splits a lemon in two and sticks them into his eyes and screams more in anger than in pain, and then I eat some actual horse-shoes. I’m gonna let Crystal narrate the next part: I must say, I never thought I’d see the day this would happen, but it has - other ponies eating real-life horse-shoes. I must say, times are changing. Then again, time always changes. The military added 13:00 to their clocks, as well as 14-23, and even putting a 0 before 1. Equestria isn’t what it used to be, I’ll tell you that. You know the kind of pony that likes to hang out with her friends and watch cartoons and likes to touch things with her tongue? Well, that’s me. I’m also the type of pony that likes to hang out with her friends and watch cartoons. Oh wait, I already said that. I also hold the Ponyville record for staring at the sun. My name is Crystal. Alright back to me again. When Blaze and I were getting ready for the showdown, AppleJack was hosting the gig. She started, “Howdy, fillies and gentlecolts!” “Howdy!” Apple Bloom cried out from the distance. “Welcome to the first annual Opposite Races Showdown and boy this is gonna be a real doozy of a battle, y’all!” AppleJack cried out. “She’s acting like this type of battle will happen in the future. First annual.” I whispered to Rainbow. “This town has a lot of annual events. I don’t really get it either, and I’ve been in Ponyville for about 3 years already.” Rainbow whispered. “Now in this corner we have Blaze Goldheart, formally a Pegasus, and now a unicorn. His mentor: Twilight Sparkle has taught him what he needs to know, and ah wish him the best of luck!” AppleJack said. “Thank you, AppleJack!” Blaze said. “And over here we have Flare Gun, formally a unicorn, now a Pegasus. He was trained by the best flyer in Equestria, or so Princess Celestia calls her.” AppleJack said. “I don’t need the princess to tell me I’m the best, AJ.” Rainbow stuck her tongue out at AJ and said. “Now then, are we ready to have this showdown?!” AppleJack cried out. “No. But we’re ready to rumble!” Crystal yelled out from the audience. “BATTLE TO THE DEATH!” Pinkie cried out and laughed evilly. “WHO-RAH!” I yelled. “Bro, remember the rules: neither of us shall be harmed in this showdown.” Blaze reminded me. “Death doesn’t always necessarily mean ‘harm’.” I corrected him. “It can cause mental harm to one though.” Blaze corrected me. “Blaze, sometimes I feel you misunderstand me on purpose, like an internet relationship.” I said. A cutaway shows an IM between a young stallion and a young mare. The mare said, “Your adorable!” Then the stallion said, “No YOU’RE adorable!” Then the mare puts up a heart sign. The stallion started to complain to himself, “Great! Now she thinks I like her. All I did was point out a typo!” The cutaway ends. “So, are we ready to start?” AppleJack asked Blaze and I. “Who’s ‘we’? You sound like you’re including yourself into this.” I pointed out. “Yeah, I agree.” Blaze said. “You haven’t changed your race yet, AJ.” AppleJack sighs and said, “Ah mean are you two ready?” “We sure are!” Blaze said. “Hey don’t talk for me, Blaze! You don’t know if I’m ready!” I corrected him. “Ok… are you ready?” Blaze asked. “Shut up.” I said. Blaze and I then bowed to eachother and we took a few steps back to begin the showdown. “You start, Flare! Show us whachya got!” Blaze insisted. “Alright then, let’s start off with a simple summer-salt.” I said. “Doncha mean summer-saw?” Blaze asked. “No I mean… yes I mean summer-saw.” I said as I started flapping my wings started floating up and back and before I knew it, I did something I never done before – a backflip! Circus Olay, here I come! “Great! Even he can fly!” Scootaloo complained. “Look on the bright side, Scoots! Dodos are no longer extinct!” Sweetie Belle teased as her and Apple Bloom started to chuckle. “Wait, I… I don’t get it.” Scoots said confusingly. “Not bad, Flare. Not bad at all.” Blaze nodded his head. “But let’s see what you’d think of this new spell I got!” Blaze’s horn suddenly began to glow and he poofed up something, but… what was it? There was nothing different in sight. “Uhh, what did you do?” I asked curiously. “Hey Flare, you look pretty wheezy. Need a hanky?” Blaze asked. “Not because I’m wheezy.” I said. Blaze opens his mouth and takes out a hanky for me, but after that hanky comes another hanky in a different color, then another hanky in a different, then another, then another, then another, until there was like a hundred hankies coming out of Blaze’s mouth. It was impressive at first, but after like… the 67th hanky, I started to get bored. “Are you nearly done?” I complained. “Yeah, hole on.” Blaze said with a mouthful of hankies. Hankies just kept coming out of his mouth and it just wouldn’t stop. “C’mon Blaze, you proved your point. Get on with it!” I complained. “I’m tying! Hole on!” Blaze yelled. After a few minutes, the hankies finally stopped. “Ok, there!” “It’s about time. My turn.” I said as I flashed out my wings and flapped them about, and right after, I pull a feather out with my teeth, take out a piece of paper and some ink, dipped the feather into the ink and then I wrote something down on the piece of paper, placed the paper inside a little glass bottle, and then placed it aside. Blaze then suddenly uses his magic to teleport the bottle away. “Oooo, nice way to use your turn, brah!” “Thanks! What did the paper say?” Blaze asked. “None of your business.” I said. “Oh… ok, if you’re gonna be that way. Anyways, your turn.” Blaze said. “I gotta say, man. Your turn that you just did was MUCH faster than your last turn!” I pointed out. “Indeed it was.” Blaze agreed. “It’ll be even faster if you don’t hurry up and take your turn, Flare.” “Blaze, can I talk to you for a moment?” Twilight asked. “Yeah, you too, Flare.” Rainbow said. “Right away!” we both said at the same time. “I said it first!” I yelled. So the both of us went over to our mentors to see what they wanted. “Blaze, what are you doing?” Twilight asked. “Flare, what are you doing?” Rainbow asked. “I’m using my magic to impress the crowd and win the showdown.” Blaze said. “I’m using my wings to impress the crowd and make them die over my awesomeness.” I said. “I like your style, Blaze.” Twilight said. “I REALLY like your style, Flare.” Rainbow said. “But can you demonstrate your magic a little…. You know…. Better?” Twilight asked. When she asked that, this Word pad actually spell-checked the ‘your’ as a ‘you’re’. For Wizard of Hope’s sake! Why do I rely on anything to correct me?! “Flare, can you demonstrate your wings a little…. You know….. less bad?” Rainbow asked. “What am I doing wrong?” Blaze asked. “You can’t spell ‘demonstrate’ without ‘demon’!” I pointed out. “You’re using simple magic.” Twilight said. “You’re using your wings the wrong way.” Rainbow said. “If you really want to-“ Twilight started. “-wow the crowd.” Rainbow added. “You’re gonna have to-“ Twilight started. “-give it everything you got!” Rainbow added. “It’s the only way you-“ “-can win this showdown.” “Also it would seem that-“ “-Twilight is starting off every sentence I’m having with you.” “And Rainbow seems to-“ “-end everything she’s saying.” “Right.” Blaze nodded. “Well, I’ll take your advice, Twilight, and-“ “-I’m really in the mood for some nachos right now.” I said as I rubbed my stomach. “That sounds nothing like-“ Rainbow started. “-you were talking about, Blaze.” Twilight added. “Ok this is getting trippy.” Blaze said. “This really needs to-“ “-But then I took an arrow to the knee.” I added. “FLARE!” Blaze called out to me. “That wasn’t what I was-“ “-my hoof is starting to itch real bad.” I added as I started raised my hoof towards my face and started gnawing on it. “Just push your limit, Blaze. Alright?” Twilight instructed him. “You too, Flare.” Rainbow instructed me. “What? We’re not gonna finish each other’s sentences anymore?” I asked. “Just… get out there!” Rainbow shoved me and demanded. So Blaze and I walked back to each other and smirked at each other. “Hi, Blaze.” I said in a mischievous voice. “Hi.” Blaze said in the same tone. “I really have no idea what to do.” I said. “Neither do I.” Blaze said. “UGH!” Twilight and Rainbow both groaned and facehooved each other. “Flare, you were you right. It’s not easy being a unicorn. I did a decent amount of-“ Blaze started. “-practice, but it wasn’t the best. Takes years of practice. So… maybe we’re better off as our own races.” I added. “I thought us finishing each other’s sentences was over?” Blaze asked. “I thought so too. It was a habit actually.” I said. “C’mon, Flare! Show your stuff!” Rainbow called out. “Rainbow, I… I think they just learned a lesson.” Twilight said. “What do you mean? Already?” Rainbow asked. “Yeah.” Twilight said. “Before the contest?” Rainbow asked. “Exactly!” Twilight said. “They both learned that-“ but before Twilight could finish, there was a loud roar in the distance. “Yes! The action!” Rainbow said excitedly. “Can’t learn a lesson without some sort of action, right Twilight?” “I prefer it the other way around to be honest.” Twilight admitted. Out in the distance, there was a giant shadow with giant tentacles, roaring real loud and approaching us pretty swiffly. “What is that?!” Aqua cried out. “Whatever it is… it sure did make this boring fight more interesting.” Crystal said. I don’t really get Crystal all the time. She really confuses me, but regardless of her weird ways, she does make good points. Ya know the kind of pony that’s far from home and the only family he has is his nosy sister and the only friends you’ll make is a bunch of weirdos? I never say that out loud though. Don’t have the guts for it, I’m afraid. I always wear blue aquatic armor, in fact, the same aquatic blue armor. I do change my underwear though daily, so don’t think I’m that disgustin’. My name is Aqua. So the humongous monster started getting closer and closer. Most of us were afraid, and the rest were just concerned, but nopony moved from their spots. “What is that?!” Spike cried out. “Uh, Spike? Are you sure you took care of that chomping book?” Twilight asked. “You never told to me to do ANYTHING with that chomping book.” Spike corrected her. “But that doesn’t explain what that monster over there is.” Just as we expected (or some of us expected cause I had no idea there was a chomping book in the first place), it was the chomping book, mutated into a giant octopus-godzilla book with huge pointy teeth and a huge slimy tongue that roared and started stomping towards our position. “Uhh, why is there a mutated book?” Rainbow asked. “Spell went wrong.” Blaze said. “Of course you’d be the one to create giant monsters with unicorn magic.” Rainbow complained. “It wasn’t that way when I made it! What do you think made it that way?!” Blaze yelled. A cutaway shows the chomping book in Twilight’s library finding a can of spinach in her pantry. As sailor music started playing in the background, the chomping book grabbed the spinach with one of its tentacles, squeezed the can and the spinach flew into the books mouth. The book’s tentacles started growing muscles and they made a ding sound, and then two steam discharges bursted out the sides of the book with the ‘toot, toot’ sound. The cutaway ends. “That still doesn’t explain where the tentacles came from.” Blaze said. “It’s Clash of the Titans.” Twilight said. “Ah.” Blaze nodded. So the monstrous book began to walk closer and closer. Everypony was starting to get afraid, even Granny Smith, who holds her chest and starts to screech and passes out. “OH NO! Granny’s havin’ a heart attack!” Apple Bloom cried out. “No ah’m not, ya ding-dong!” Granny Smith woke up and corrected her. “That’s just the way ah scream!” “Don’t worry, everypony! I’ll protect us from the monster!” Rainbow cried out. “TO THE DEATH!” Pinkie yelled. “Step aside, Rainbow! I think it’s up to us to defeat that mutant.” I said. “Are you sure, man?” Blaze asked me. “We’re barely experienced in our new races.” “This is our chance to prove ourselves. We don’t have much time. If one of us is to win this bet, how about the one who defeats the book will be champion?” I suggested. “Come to think of it, that’s not a bad idea!” Blaze agreed. “I second that!” Twilight agreed. “Good luck, you two! Win this for both of us, Flare! I still wanna see Blaze in that maid outfit!” Rainbow said mischievously. “Blaze is gonna wear a maid outfit?!” Crystal yelled out surprisingly. “Not if I beat this monster I won’t!” Blaze yelled out. Blaze activated his horn and started using his magic on the book, and as for me, I started to fly up and started to fight the monster myself. Everypony was watching Blaze and I in action as we used our newly formed race powers to destroy the book, but you think it’s that simple? No, the only magic Blaze was able to do was grow a daisy on the book’s head. The book did look a little more lovely, and even it was impressed by that, but it didn’t stop it from going berserk around the farm. As for me, I was flying in circles, away from the book, and even crashing into a hay stack. “Oh it’s no use! Rainbow, it’s up to you and me.” Twilight said as she jinxes it. The book used it’s tentacle to grab Rainbow and Twilight, and trap them on its grip. Twilight and Rainbow started to scream. “RAINBOW!” Blaze yelled as he continued using his cheap parlor trick magic to stop the mutated book. Blaze summoned a giant black rainbow cloud in hoping he can strike the book, but his magic backfires on him and strikes him back. Oooooooh! So that’s why they call it lightning strikes! I’ve been wondering that. Lightning strikes is a reference to Star Wars! Wow, I never thought of that! Just then, I suddenly burst out of the hay stack with a needle on my nose and I say to myself, “C’mon, Flare! You can do this! Rainbow is depending on you!” So after I removed the needle from my nose, I flew up to the book real fast in attempt to defeat it. Good news: I flew straight this time, so that’s an improvement! Bad news: I flew right passed the book and into the bell tower on the barn. “Twilight, I’m sorry! I failed you! I’m no good at being a unicorn!” Blaze yelled out. “Same here!” I yelled out. “Except I’m talking about me being a Pegasus, and I’m talking to Rainbow, and instead of ‘I failed you’, I just… didn’t pass, and instead of ‘no good’, I ‘ain’t good’. “ “It’s ok, Blaze! You tried your best!” Twilight yelled out as she was still stuck on the book’s tentacle with Rainbow. “If you’re not meant to be, Flare, you’re not meant to be. It’s ok. We’re all awesome at something, but we don’t need to be awesome at EVERYTHING.” Rainbow explained. “And don’t let anypony tell you otherwise!” Twilight added. “Thank you!” Blaze said. “Can you get yourselves out of there?” “We’re trying!” Rainbow yelled out as she struggled. “I’ll try to use my magic!” Twilight said as she was about to use her magic to stop the book, but the book uses one its other tentacles to block her horn. “I can’t! It’s blocking my magic!” “It’s up to us, Blaze!” I yelled out. “Why? We’re not good at what we are currently!” Blaze asked. “Why can’t our friends help us?” “Because we’re just here to watch.” Crystal said. “Don’t ask us why. It’s complicated to explain.” Aqua said. “We’re not the heroes of this story. Duh!” Pinkie said. “What are you talkin’ about, Pinks?” AppleJack asked. “Death, AppleJack. Death.” Pinkie nodded. “So what do we do then, Blaze?” I asked. “I… I don’t know. I guess we work together against the book…. I guess? It’s pretty obviously actually.” Blaze explained. “Yeah, pretty much. Every solution here in Equestria is either working together, or it’s ok to be different, and so far, the friendship lessons I’ve been seeing here keep repeating.” I said. “Yeah, so… yeah.” Blaze said. “Charge?” I asked. “Charge.” Blaze said. “Ok.” I said. So Blaze started to scream and sprint towards the book with his horn glowing, and I started flying real fast towards the book, hoping for the best. As we were close to the book, something was happening with my wings and Blaze’s horn. Blaze’s horn suddenly disappears, which kinda startles him, and he stops running. My wings suddenly disappear as well, and I began to fall. “BLAZE! FLARE!” Twilight and Rainbow yelled out. Rainbow then looked over to Twilight with a glare and she asked, “Are we… are we gonna do that again? Talk at the same time?” As I regain consciousness and rub my head, I had that familiar feeling as I was rubbing my head. “HEY! The pointy thing on my head is back!” “So are my wings!” Blaze cried out in excitement. “Wow, it’s already been 24 hours? Time ‘flies’ when you’re having fun! HA! Get it, Blaze? Time FLIES?” I teased. “HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA- no.” Blaze laughed sarcastically. The book started to roar as it continued to… wait, the book wasn’t doing anything. It was just holding Twilight and Rainbow and continued to roar, not much else. Now that Blaze has his wings back, and I have my horn, we were ready to fight the book. Blaze flies up to the book and uses his dragon breath on it, and I activated my hornsaber and used that on the book, as well as my laser blast. We harmed the book, and it lost its grip on Twilight and Rainbow, and they were able to join the fight. To conclude this fight, Twilight used a reverse spell on the book, and the book started shrinking, losing its tentacles and even its sharp teeth, and the book returns to its original form, except now it’s all moistly and wet out of all the saliva it had from roaring and chomping so much. The four of us all walked over to the book and looked down at it. “Is it over?” Rainbow asked. “Not quite.” I said as I took out Medusa’s Head and aimed it right at the book to turn it into stone. “What was that for?” Twilight asked. “It’s a Clash of the Titians book, and it was a kraken. Obviously, the only one to truly defeat this monster was to use Medusa’s Head.” I said. “Where did you even get that?” Blaze asked. “Oh I dunno. It was my personal chest inside my bedroom.” I said as I placed a blind fold on Medusa’s eyes for safe keeping and placed it safely aside. “Well, it is over now, and we learned a big lesson today, didn’t we, Flare? Neither of us are better at each other’s races, and never place unnecessary bets.” Blaze explained. “Uh, YOU learned that lesson, Blaze. I didn’t want to bet anything. I only wanted to become a Pegasus for fun.” I corrected him. “That is true, Blaze.” Rainbow agreed. “So who won the bet anyway?” Blaze asked. “I did.” Spike said. “Spike?” Blaze asked. “Yes. Allow me to explain.” Spike started as he used his firebreath to cough up a contract. “Blaze and Flare had a bet to see who is better at each other’s races and the answer is: neither. They both were bad at it. You two may not know it, but Twilight and Rainbow also had a deal to see who would be a better teacher to teach them everything they knew, and the answer was: neither, ‘cause look at the results. Not to mention, both of them got hurt during the showdown, and that was against the rules. I was also in the bet. I knew neither of them would be better at each other’s races. You’re only better at what you’re already good at. Not the other way around. So I win this bet. That means you all have to wear maid outfits and serve ME all the greatest foods in Equestria made by the greatest chefs.” “WHAT?!” Blaze yelled. “It’s true it would seem.” Twilight said. “The agreement never lies. Me of all ponies should know that.” I said. “Jokes on you, Blaze! I wanted to see you in that maid outfit in the first place, so technically, I’m a winner too.” Rainbow said mischievously. “Does anypony even notice that ah haven’t been sayin’ anythin’ at all?” Engie asked. “Ah, relax Engie. You’re gonna have your own time to shine next chapter.” Crystal said, comforting him. The next day, over at the big event in Town Hall with the greatest chefs in Equestria, some different chosen invited townfolk were over there, having a taste of it all, and needful to say, I was cooking, but at the same time I had to go with Blaze, Rainbow, and Twilight, and we were all wearing maid outfits, and we were serving the event. Spike was whistling as he saw us. “Shut it, brah.” I said as I served him a horse-shoe. “What is that?” Spike asked. “BON APPETITE, JERKFACE!” I yelled at him. “Rude.” Spike said. “Hey, this was all worth it to see you in a dress, Blaze.” Rainbow smirked at him and said. Blaze sighs. Well, there you go! This proves to you that I am a terrible Pegasus. It makes up for my leet magic spells, y’know? Meanwhile, over at Canterlot, a dark shadow was walking around the castle gardens, sneaking past the guards, hiding behind shrubs and statues. After a little sneaking, the shadow goes over to a statue and looks up at it. “Yes! All part of my next plan!” the dark said and snorted. Just then, a mysterious bottle appears out of nowhere and lands on the shadow’s head. “OW!” he yelled. “What is this? This ain’t no ocean! Why is there a note in a bottle?” The shadow uses his magic to open the bottle and take the note out and reads it, “None of your business.” The note read. “What in the wide world of bacon? You know what? Nevermind, because this won’t stop me from starting up the next phase of my plan!” the shadow places a dark circle with a red S logo on the statue the shadow was observing, and that particular statue he was looking at was stoned Discord.