//------------------------------// // Chapter 1- Contract: The Con Artists // Story: My Little Assassins: Everything is Permitted // by Icarus //------------------------------// Castle of the Moon, Everfree Forest, 8pm "Two feathers, yer highness? But..." Luna simply nodded, levitating two slender white feathers into the orange earth pony's saddlebag. "Yes. Your mission has two targets. I believe you are familiar with them? Con artists who have been scamming rural ponies out of their savings, driving families from their land. Flim and Flam are their names." "Oh, yeah, those two varmints. Where can ah find 'em?" Applejack narrowed her eyes. "The last I heard, they were planning a stop at Trottingham to show off their new machine." The orange earth pony nodded. With a brief, respectful bow to the princess, she turned on her hooves and cantered out of the castle to prepare. Ponyville, 9am "Oh, hey Applejack! Nice, uh, clothes... Where're you going?" Applejack mentally cursed. Dang it all. Should've waited until I was out of sight of Ponyville before changing into this dumb-flank carnival get-up. "Uh, hey Twilight... Just on mah way to Trottingham! Business trip, gotta negotiate to accumulate, y'all know how it goes, right?" "Oh, Trottingham?" The purple unicorn raised an eyebrow at her friend. "Isn't that a little far to go by hoof? Why not just take the express?" She gestured with a hoof to the other end of town to the local railway station. "You'll be there and back in a day." "That's... Actually a real good idea, sugarcube," Applejack sighed. "I'll see y'all later, okay?" She gave Twilight Sparkle a wide-eyed, hopeful grin, mentally urging the young mare to move off and leave her alone. "Ooookay," Twilight shrugged at her friend's slightly manic rictus, "See you later, Applejack." Once Twilight was around the corner, Applejack facehoofed before galloping off down the road to Trottingham as fast as her hooves could carry her. No way was she getting on a train in her full regalia, much less giving the guard on the platform a chance to ID her as a passenger. Hoofington, 6pm "-brothers... Traveling salesponies nonpareil! Yeah!" Applejack's ears twitched as she trudged towards Hoofington. A full three days on the road from Ponyville to Trottingham to pick up the trail again leading toward Hoofington, stopping only for naps, had made her whole body ache, and she ground her teeth as the last chorus of that damnable song blackened her mood still further. Judging by the sound of things, the two con artists had just arrived, and would be there for a while. Time enough for a meal and a good night's sleep. A quick glance around her located the local watering hole- a tavern named the Silver Churn, with a painted sign showing the churn in question brim-full of rich white milk. The barmare was an old unicorn, but polite enough. The orange pony tossed down a few bits from her saddlebags to pay for a double-shot of milk and a room for the night, but she remained at the bar, nursing her drink as she listened to the gossip from the local ponies. "...say they can make ice cream tastier and faster than Mr and Mrs Cream! Double and Butter bet their farm on it!" "I know! I don't blame them, it's easy bits! Who's ever heard of ice that stays -that- cold? Their machine's a scam..." Applejack's ears perked up under her hood. Sounds like they're pulling the same scam. Double Cream and Butter Cream were well-known even in Ponyville for the quality of their farm's milk products, ranging from milkshakes to cheese to ice cream. She'd had to endure enough of Pinkie's raving about that. The thought of her friend's face should Hoofington Farm Ice Cream go out of business galvanised her. Go on, AJ. Do it for Pinkie, and do it for all the poor sons-of-mares who've lost their land to these two creeps. Hoofington, 8pm the next evening Applejack twisted her head back to her saddlebags, grabbing the two feathers that nestled there. Holding them carefully in her teeth, she dipped them in the red half-frozen froth that now filled the central vat of the Screamingly-Creamy Ice-Cream Creamer 9001. "Looks like y'all need to chill out a moment," she quipped around the feathers before slipping them back into her bag. "...YAAAAAAAAARGH!" Applejack was shaken out of her post-quip awesome-basking by the horrified yell of one of the locals, who'd rounded the corner to congratulate the two brothers on their (admittedly-shady) victory in the hope of some free magically-chilled ice cream. The sound spurred her into a dead gallop, leaping over his back and off down a side street. She was all too aware of the cries of 'police!' coming from behind her, and the sound of stampeding hooves getting closer. Rounding a corner into an alley, she realised that her evening had suddenly gotten a lot worse. Horse feathers. A dead end. Sorry, your Highness, looks like you won't be gettin' my report after all- A flash of white caught Applejack's attention, and her eyes quickly spotted a white sheet draped over a half-dismantled cart. Perfect. She leapt up onto the wagon, paying no mind as it rocked a little under her weight, before bounding up onto the low roof of the house. Breaking into a gallop, leaping from rooftop to rooftop, all too aware of the yells of the guards below, she mentally calculated her route out of town. Shoot. Got to find somewhere to lie low. A quick glance around confirmed her worst fears- the local police force had at least one pegasus, a navy-blue mare, that was closing fast. She couldn't just slip back into the inn or try to blend into a crowd- as obvious as her hood seemed to be, it was nondescript enough if a crowd of other ponies were hiding the saddlebags and cutie-mark-covering white tabard, but on her own, it was all too obvious. Applejack groaned, preparing to give up the chase as she felt her hindlegs giving up from the sprint, but an obvious plume of white and a loud hoot caught her attention. Shifting her weight, she veered a hard left, bounding up onto a chimney stack and onto the roof of what she realised was the local railway station- with the Friendship Express already pulling through at a fair clip. Yes! Before the police-pegasus could correct her course to intercept Applejack the earth pony was already leaping onto the wooden arm of the station's mailbag-catcher- what the darnation do they call those things, anyway?- and clean off into the open air. Time seemed to stand still for a long moment, the police-pegasus' mouth falling open as the fleeing assassin leapt to what would surely be her death. Applejack could swear she heard the cry of an owl as she descended toward the speeding train, crashing through an open skylight to a certain, messy demi-- into the soft, slightly bouncy mass of a huge carton of hay. Well, I ain't complaining, the slightly concussed earth pony thought to herself as she stared at the ceiling for a long moment. At the sound of the carriage door opening she quickly burrowed down into the hay, her ears standing straight up as the guard clopped around. "What the hay..." he muttered, picking up the shards of glass with his unicorn magic, floating them out with him. "Damn foals playing ball on the platform again..." he sighed, stomping out. The sound of the door slamming covered a relieved sigh from deep within the hay. Dear Princess Luna, Today I learned that planning a proper escape from a contract is even more important than planning how you'll approach it. If you don't know your escape route in advance, you'll be forced to rely on blind luck. Your faithful harbinger, Applejack PS: I also learned that if you plan on sending me after two ponies at once again, I need another one of those snicky hoofblade things. I had to kick Flim into the ice cream machine and that just isn't a nice way for a pony to go, even if he is a grade-A flankhole. Applejack Contract: Flim and Flam Method: Hidden Blade, Industrial Sabotage Outcome: Successful Author's Note: The positive response to the first chapter warms the cockles of my black little heart. I had planned to just let it be a one-off, but a few folks asked for more. I don't know if I'll be showing the actual assassinations, as I would rather keep these fics silly rather than violent. Flim and Flam were indeed flankholes who scammed old mares out of their life savings and land, but who wants to read about Applejack stabbing a pony in the neck and kicking his brother to a messy death in his own machine? Anyway, constructive feedback is always welcome! Also, if you want to read an Assassins' Creed/Pony fic that's a hell of a lot better than mine and much more serious, go and read Brotherhood of the Moon because it's clopping amazing stuff.