//------------------------------// // Man is the only animal that blushes - or needs to // Story: Between a Rock and a Hard Place // by goo //------------------------------// Applejack flinched as she heard a loud noise come from upstairs. She took a quick glance at the almost-done pie resting in the oven, debating if she should investigate. Another much louder thump shook the floor a bit. Screw the apple pie... She turned away from the warm oven and began to clamber up the stairs. If her prisoner was attempting escape, she needed to intervene quickly. The thief was not deserving of her kindness, but AJ hadn't expected her to hit the ground with such a resounding thud when she took her prisoner into custody. The golden mare had been raised better than to let anypony who was hurt just lie there, even if they were a good-for-nothing criminal. Thankfully the mare, although young, was quite strong. She hefted the literally feather-weighted pegasus onto her back, and half-carried-half-dragged her into her home. It took her a while to drag the warm pony pillow all the way from the back orchard to the house. She was still sore. And the only thanks she got was the nasty brute presumably breaking her stuff. The pony opened the door roughly, ready to give the recently awakened criminal a proper punishment. She felt a rouge of fury building up behind her cheeks. It was becoming more and more common around this pony, she noted silently. She opened her mouth to yell, but found she couldn't utter a single word when she saw the despicable sight before her. The glass was shattered all over the floor, and the water had spread around on the floor. It looked like it would be a nasty clean up. But, even more despicable was the pony who was supposed to be lying in the bed. She was on the floor too. She had rouged up as well, but in a different manner than the kindly cowpony. Dash had glass all over her side. For some reason, she figured that she could fly just fine in spite of her headache and tied leg. Obviously the headache was a bit worse than previously presumed. So there she lay - for the second time this day, caught by a rope and on the ground. But this time, instead of passing out peacefully, she had a couple shards of glass embedded in her coat, one more noticeably in her cheek. Applejack could only gape for so long, before her wounded captive interrupted her shock. "Hey, uh... A little help here? At least untie me... I really can't go anywhere anyways." The pegasus tried to straighten up again, but the rope was tightly bound to her leg. Her head hurt even worse now, but she didn't notice because of her latest predicament. Applejack stepped forward cautiously, responding in the affirmative to Rainbow Dash without having to nod her head or speak a word. She began to untie the rope, but before letting go of her hold on the mare, she said, "Pegasus, I don't want any moving going on when I let go of this rope. If you move even a little, I can guarantee you'll be stuck up like a porcupine. So, uh, just don't move." She then let go of the rope, and it fell to the ground. Dash's leg, which had previously been suspended in the air, fell limply to meet her other leg. It briefly crossed her mind that this could have been quite kinky, but her mind was soon preoccupied with the approach of her captor. Dash had half a mind to try to move. But something, somewhere deep inside, told her that the pony wasn't tricking her. There was no hint of a sly motive in the voice, and something about her tone that felt sincere. It was beautiful. Not that Dash noticed. She was in a bit of a more self-centered situation, and dwelling on the series of shards in her sides. The cowpony's voice commanded her to wait a "jiffy", and the sound of receding hoof-steps echoed through the air. Dash waited, even past the 0.0000000000333564 seconds mark. The pony returned quite quickly, after banging around in a closet for a bit. She swept up the glass with her freshly-fetched broom. After a short while, she told Dash to stand. Shakily, the blue pegasus lifted herself off the ground. For the first time, she was looking Applejack in the eyes. She kind of wanted to spit in her face. But she also wanted to hug her. Then again, she really, really wanted to run away. Rainbow Dash looked Rarity in the eyes, trying to tell if she was being serious. "So you really think that Applejack, the pony who won't wear anything but her dusty old hat, would be able to be convinced to do a photoshoot with you? And that you'd be able to seduce her while doing so?" Her voice was sarcastic and callous. Rarity had expected nothing else. But she hadn't expected her to shoot down every single one of her ideas. The help from Rainbow Dash that she had imagined was disintrest and reassurance, perhaps a crude joke or two about being a lesbian. Maybe a story about her own coming out... the pegasus was out, right? Practically flamboyant, in fact. At least... I think so? She hadn't expected such a vehement, emotional, and negative response from the normally lax pegasus. The unicorn's lip quivered, but she held her composure like a true professional. Something like this was beyond important. It was the paramount time of her life - falling in love. "Well, I did read a novel about something like that..." Her voice trailed off uncertainly; her confidence faltered. But suddenly, the white unicorn brightened, saying, "Oh! How about we go camping, and we get lost, and then I get hurt, and then she saves me and we fall in love?" Rarity grinned eagerly, her mind flashing briefly to the steamy scenes in the novel and imagining the soupy romance that she so ardently desired. Dash gave her a skeptical glance while dismissing a rather memorable memory of one of her own near-escapades with AJ. She replied with an exasperated sigh. "How about something that doesn't end in her seduction? You know how conservative she is, it might really upset her. Even if she got caught up in the moment, she would feel guilty later. You'd want her to be the one to start it, so she would feel like she was in control." The slightly flustered pegasus stopped herself before she went too deep into the extensive thought that she had put into the seduction of Applejack. She'd plotted it out dozens of times, but no matter what, she faltered at the last moment. Applejack trusted her. Deceiving her would break her heart and the trust they shared. "Why do you even like her, anyways?" Today was a day. Scratch that, today was the day. In fact, it was the day that Rainbow Dash would finally profess her steamy, ardent, passionate love for Applejack. This may or may not be the third day in such a category, but this time, the plan was sure to work. Dash may seem to be a lazy, spontaneous nutcase. And, she was by almost all normal standards. However, when she wanted to plan something out, she went above and beyond to plan out every single detail. First of all, she would crash land in the orchards. She'd have to scout out the area first, and make sure she landed near AJ. If that dumb, old, red-hued lug found her, he'd probably spend half an hour just processing the situation. He wasn't really that dumb. All the same, she needed Applejack to come to her rescue. Her friend would do so, and invite her into her home as hospitality dictated. Shortly following entry into her home, she would be invited to stay for dinner. Timing was key. If she landed after the Apple family dinner time, she would miss her chance. If she landed too long before, she'd be overstaying her welcome. Also, it was cider season. AJ knew she still owed her some cider after her help with that new shed, so she would certainly get her fair share. Even though Dash wasn't such a featherweight in terms of her ability to hold a drink, she'd pretend to be positively wasted after just two. She'd drunkenly profess her love for her, and gauge the reaction. It left an excuse if she was spurned, and a wonderful conversation to continue if she wasn't. This was an excellent plan. All plans that involve inebriation are excellent plan. Plan set. Go time. The pegasus jumped off of her latest cloud-perch, and felt the wind take to life beneath her wings. Today was definitely the day. Instead of choosing any of those three options, Dash simply stood and stared. Even though she hated the situation, she knew she couldn't escape. Angering the sturdy earth pony further would only get her fired, and maybe even jailed. She was already broke enough as is, and any judge would make her spend a long time in the clinker. At the same time, she wanted to know why the pony hadn't done it already. More than anything, she was concerned with the glass-filled lacerations on her side. The pony's cheeks showed a vibrant, red blush. It was one thing to be caught by a clever lassoing cowpony, but an entirely other thing to be caught by a slightly-less-sentient wooden bed. Dash had always thought of herself as an athlete, but right now she felt like a geek stuffed in a locker and expecting to receive a swirly in a few. Applejack stepped forward, careful to avoid the pile of glass that she had swept up, and gently pushed the pegasus pony back onto the bed in a sitting position. Dash folded like wet clay at her touch. The golden mare looked the numbed pony in the eyes; her emerald ones subconsciously reassuring the pegasus with their crinkly crow's feet. "Hold still. Bite the pillow." The accent was still there, but a fair bit of maternal sternness seemed to override it to an extent. Her commands were simple, and Dash obeyed. She thought the pillow was a bit silly, but figured she should do whatever she was told since she was in no condition to fly. Did she really have any reason not to trust the mare who had caught her stealing and still taken care of her like she was her own kin? Suddenly, Dash understood the pillow. Inside of her head, a stream of profanities exploded so violently that it cannot be repeated in this story. We're not even sure if they are all real words. She bit down hard as a piece of glass was removed from her haunches. The mare hadn't even noticed that Applejack's mouth was nearing her flank. Or that her lips made contact with the cloud on her cutie mark. It was one, fluid, yanking movement that ended in one hell of a sting. Again, the two made eye contact. A pregnant, new understanding to their relationship had just been established. The quaint cowpony held a shard of glass in her mouth, and didn't break eye contact as she put it on the side table. Dash never let go of the pillow. Applejack bent down again after calculating her reaction. The process repeated until the fragments were gone. Dash released the pillow, but still couldn't find the nerves to speak. She looked nervously at her side and noticed that the wounds weren't quite as grievous as she had assumed. Her cheeks tinged red a bit more. It seemed like she could only act like a scrawny little filly in comparison to the wise-beyond-her-years pony in front of her. Applejack broke the silence again. "I'm Applejack. And you are?" Rarity looked at Rainbow Dash, somewhat taken aback by Dash's insights into Applejack's personality. Had she truly misjudged the character of the cowpony so much? She thoroughly doubted it. Ever since the night she fell in love with the charming, golden mare, she knew that they were meant to be. The two had an understanding beyond the physical. Rainbow Dash didn't understand. She cleared her throat. "Dash, I think you're misunderstanding love in its fullest capacity. You see, when somepony is in love, they want to be fully one with the other, immediately." Dash looked down at the table but continued listening. "They don't want to lose sight of the other. Something slow simply won't do. I do believe she might feel the same way for me. I think your opinion is well intentioned, but certainly ill informed." Rarity danced over the words she just said in her head, and realized they were harsh. The dreary look on her companion's face was obviously from embarrassment about being shown up. She quickly followed up. "I mean, I'm sure you're capable of feeling such emotions and passions. I really appreciate your help with all of this, you know the apple of my eye a bit better on a casual level than I do." She grinned cheesily, hoping that her out-of-line statement wouldn't push away her confidante. Dash avoided making eye contact with Rarity; she was afraid of what consequences that might bring. She wasn't feeling embarrassed - she was despondent. At first, the pegasus didn't suspect that the vain unicorn could possibly be serious. She didn't suspect the possibility that the two shared a connection. However, the sound of her glittery voice was so passionate that Dash began to take her seriously as a threat. I do believe she might feel the same way for me... Dash rolled the phrase around in her head, debating the brevity of the situation. Of course Applejack loved Rarity more. Who wouldn't? With a body that looked like it was shaped in the image of Celestia herself, who could resist her? Her coiffed mane simply outshone Dash's shock of polychromatic hairs. The white mare smelled wonderful, as much as Dash would try to deny it. Dash casually lifted a cyan forelimb above her head and was greeted with the scent of an army of gym-bags. She quickly replaced her arm. It seemed obvious why AJ was ignoring her attempts now. Applejack loved Rarity. Perhaps she just made fun of her to mask her affections. Definitely. Naturally, to respond in a manner that corresponded to her desolate sentiment, Dash spoke with a tone of latent fury. "Thanks for telling me all about love, Rare. You're truly the element of generosity, sharing your knowledge like that. As much as I enjoyed spending time with you, it's been one long hour of Rarity-time, and I have to get back to work. Goodbye." Dash hustled out of the room before her host could even give a parting thank-you. She left behind a bamboozled Rarity, who immediately began to regret sharing with the fiery pegasus in the first place. There was nothing like a fast-paced flight through the air to soothe rampant nerves. Dash cut through the air, whipping over the orchards. She performed a few casual loops. To any ground-dwelling pony, it would look the same as all her tricks. To a pegasus who had been through flight school, it was baby stuff. The weather pony didn't want to risk actually crash landing, and with a nervous brain, she very well may. Soon enough, Dash's eagle eyes caught sight of the blonde, curvaceous cowpony. Target acquired. With a flick of her powerful wings, Dash began to hurtle towards the ground, right near Applejack. Deftly, the pegasus spread her feathered appendages, powerfully slowing her eminent crash. The pegasus thudded across the ground nonetheless. Perfect. She could have stuck the landing if she tried, but instead crumpled to the ground like a professional soccer player. The pegasus intentionally altered her flight trajectory at the last minute so that she would drag across the ground rather than smashing into it, so her hooves left long drag marks. The rainbow pegasus had succeeded in phase one. She wasn't called Rainbow Crash for nothing. Sure enough, her dependable friend began to briskly trot over. Dash's ear was on the ground, and she could hear the hoofsteps vibrating through the earth faster than the speed of sound in air. Dash let out a loud groan as she rolled over so that her legs were in the air. Soon enough, the cowpony was standing over her. Their eyes met, and Dash felt her whole world spin. She wasn't sure if it was the crash landing, or if it was the intensity of her vibrant eyes. Probably both. "Uh, hi." Dash internally berated herself for ruining the moment with the horrendously awkward greeting. She kind of exhaled too much on the hi, and breathed a little in Applejack's face. Damn, forgot to brush my teeth again... Applejack didn't notice the massive amount of internal dialogue going on inside of her friend's head. "Dash, are you okay? You just took a pretty heavy fall there." Her brow was furrowed in concern. Dash noticed that her golden hoof was touching her shoulder. The touch seemed to burn and ebb. It was distracting. Applejack was breathing heavily, too. Also, the world was still spinning. Dash looked at Applejack and said while grinning, "Oh AJ, I'm just fine, I loooove you." Applejack cocked one eyebrow up and tilted her head questioningly. The response was immediately passed off as some sort of mental issue associated with plummeting from the sky and smashing into the ground. "Hon, I think you may have hit the ground a bit harder than I thought. Can you stand up?" She stepped backwards so that her leg was no longer touching Dash, much to the pegasus's chagrin. The cowpony must have not noticed they were touching. Dash slapped herself mentally. First of all, where hell did that come from? She knew where... Her mind had become dizzy with the combination of the physical contact with the ground, the physical contact with Applejack, and her nerves. She had just soiled the plan entirely by spewing out her brain's only thought at that moment in a manner that wasn't taken seriously at all. [teehee] The athlete couldn't help but feel trickle of disappointment at how easily AJ dismissed her advances, if you could call them that. Was she that deep in the friendzone? Plan B? Currently, there was no plan B. Time to make it up from here on out. The pegasus rolled over, fluffing out her wings. She intentionally fluffed them out in Applejack's face. If her wings were hands, she would have slapped her friend. However, since they were wings, it was more like a tickle. She knew Applejack would just stand there and ignore it. Shakily, the pegasus stood. She immediately swayed towards the golden cowpony while twirling around and pretending to be really dizzy. When she had stopped her drunken balance-dance, she was shoulder-to-shoulder with Applejack. Their sides were touching, and Rainbow was leaning heavily on her sweaty friend. Plan B was to act stupid. Pretty simple when you may or may not have a concussion. Did anyone catch the sneaky American Pie reference in the beginning? Also, someone mentioned that they liked the past story more. So you get more past! Huzzah!