The next step on Rainbow Dash’s loosely constructed agenda was finding Pinkie Pie and also Fluttershy if necessary. Part of her wanted to put the confrontation off, but years of being what Applejack had called a “loose cannon” had conditioned her to shun the very idea of putting things off, unless there was napping that could be done in the interim. Napping took precedence over most things, but at that moment – no matter the aches she still felt from some of Applejack’s better-aimed kicks and bites – Rainbow Dash did not feel tired at all. She was… jittery. This was something really important, like a big race or meeting with the Wonderbolts or managing a tornado team, but for a change, it wasn’t so important just because it was seriously awesome. There was a whole lot riding on how she was about to perform. Fortunately, Rainbow Dash was nothing if not a performer.
Rainbow Dash passed several other pegasi in the Ponyville airspace during her search, including Cloud Kicker, who was happy to learn that her fellow weather pony was more or less back in action. She refused, however, to be drawn into conversation, promising to review her schedule later that day when she had the time. She had a party pony to find, and find her she did, bouncing gaily about the Ponyville parkgrounds while beside her, Fluttershy knelt down to the river to feed a crowd of ducklings. Rainbow Dash settled into the branches of a tree to watch them.
Something had definitely changed between her two friends. Fluttershy, always full of kind smiles for everypony who consented to be kind to her as well, had a smile for Pinkie Pie that was far softer and more powerful than any of her regular ones: a smile which Pinkie returned. And Pinkie the madcap partier, the loose cannon to outfire Rainbow Dash’s own, was stopping to help feed the ducklings, stopping to cradle some of them with the same tenderness she had shown to Pound and Pumpkin Cake in their infancy. Sometimes too she would unerringly pick out the braver ducklings among the brood and place them in her massive poufy pink mane, giving them the ride of their young lives as she bounced back and forth across the bridge that spanned their river home. In the tree above them, Rainbow Dash found herself hesitating. This was so far beyond sappy it was downright sentimental. Oughtn’t she come back and try again at a better time?
“Hi there Rainbow Dash!”
Rainbow Dash jumped completely out of her skin and whirled around. There in the tree next to her sat Pinkie Pie, face an enormous grin of inexplicably immaculate teeth, the biggest and most beautiful blue eyes in all of Equestria gazing at her in delight. “Pinkie?” she asked, ignoring how obvious the answer was. “But… but you were down there! I was watching you!”
“And you were up here and I decided to watch you instead!” said Pinkie Pie. “You sure do like hanging out in trees, Dashie! Do all pegasi like trees? Should I get Pound a tree for his next birthday?”
Rainbow Dash felt a curious sensation as her friend called her “Dashie,” but did her best to ignore it. “What?” she asked instead. “No, uh, I mean, probably not? Look, Pinkie, I need to talk to you…”
But “Oh, hello, Rainbow Dash!” came from behind her, and Rainbow Dash turned around again, this time to see Fluttershy hovering in the air before her, wings flapping rhythmically and unconsciously on either side. Long gone were the days of Fluttershy being too petrified to fly up the side of a mountain, and just as long gone were the days Rainbow Dash would have had it in her heart to deride her mercilessly for that. Rainbow Dash stared into that innocent smile and wondered just what it was she was there to accomplish.
“Hey Flutters!” said Pinkie from behind her. “Dashie just wanted to talk to me about something!”
“Really?” Fluttershy flapped closer. “Can I hear it too? You’ve been kind of missing these last few days, Rainbow Dash, and we’ve all been worried about you…”
Even though the confrontation had been her idea to begin with, Rainbow Dash was beginning to feel trapped between the two lovebirds. She gulped. “You too? Um, yeah, sure, I guess…”
“Rainbow Dash,” said Pinkie abruptly, “you’re hurt!”
Rainbow Dash shuddered as a surprisingly gentle pink hoof ran its way across her newly won wounds. “Huh? Oh, yeah, I got those from Applejack. No big deal.”
Fluttershy gasped, her front hooves covering her mouth in a moment of shock. “You got in a fight with Applejack?”
Pinkie leaned dangerously far forward. “Applejack attacked you?!”
“No! I mean, more the other way around…”
“You attacked Applejack?” they both asked, this time in unison.
Rainbow Dash sank her head into her front hooves. “Somepony’ll hear you guys! Look, it’s really no big deal! I had some energy, she was bored, we had a quick fight. Sometimes friends do that.”
“Oh, good,” said Fluttershy. “So you don’t hate her or anything?”
“Well, we did both say that we hated each other, and… no, it’s not like that!” This was all going completely wrong. If this were a race in Cloudsdale, she’d have started off going backwards, crashed into several clouds while recovering, and then probably also set her tail on fire. She gave up. “We’re totally cool, I swear. Just a friendly fight. Look, I really have to go do, umm… weather. Weather… things. With clouds. I’ll catch you girls later!”
“Dashie?” asked Pinkie Pie before she could even jump out of the tree, and Rainbow Dash felt herself sitting back down to stare into that gorgeous, inquisitive face. “Didn’t you want to talk to me about something?”
“We’re your friends, Rainbow Dash,” said Fluttershy. “It looks like there’s something bothering you, and if it’s not too much of an imposition… we’d really like to help.”
“Do you need a party?” asked Pinkie. “I’ve never thrown a party in a tree before, but I bet I could find a way! Maybe instead of balloons, there could be robins’ eggs! Flutters, you could find me some robin eggs to borrow, right?”
“Of course,” said Fluttershy, “but you’d have to promise me you’d take very good care of them. So, um… Rainbow Dash?”
Just like Applejack, her friends had seen there was something bothering her and they wanted to know what it was. And Rainbow Dash was not a very private pony. In her youth she had practically idolized Spitfire and Soarin’ and the rest of the big name performers, and her admiration for them had only dulled, not vanished, with age. She had grown accustomed to having a fan club, and nopony could deny how much she loved to show off, although some found that a more positive quality in her than others. Sitting in that tree, being asked to explain her feelings, her friends interested in what was going on in her life… it felt like an invitation for a performance. For better or worse, Rainbow Dash was nothing if not a performer.
“Okay,” she said. “Pinks, I know you’re all into Pinkie Promises and all, but have either of you guys had a secret – not, like, somepony else’s secret, but one of your own – that you felt really bad for keeping? Like, it was kind of burning you up inside?”
Pinkie nodded grimly. “I really ate ten of Mrs. Cake’s corncakes,” she said, as though it was the most heinous act in the world. Rainbow Dash, not really sure what she was talking about, decided not to press the issue.
“I was afraid to admit I was afraid of dragons,” said Fluttershy. “Um, is that what you mean?”
“Maybe?” said Rainbow Dash. “Uh, so… I guess I need to tell you two things. Number one, Pinkie: I like you. Okay? I like you a lot, like, more than just as a friend, and I have for a while. You’re great. But I’m not going to do anything about it, because…
“Because, number two: you two are great together. I can’t say I understand it, you’re so different, but you’re obviously making each other happy and I would have to be a pretty awful pony to try to get in the way of that. You two are two of the greatest friends a gal could ask for, and I’m… I’m really happy you two are happy. Does that make sense? Like, if a big dragon ever shows up and wants to destroy your relationship or something like that, just point me at him, and I’ll send him packing for you. You’re worth it, and I wouldn’t want to throw away our friendship for anything.”
Rainbow Dash stopped talking, seeing that her two friends were looking at each other. She tried to read their expressions. Was that… concern? Curiosity? Hope? Ugh, subtlety of expression was so hard to deal with! She found herself growing increasingly uncomfortable as the silence progressed. She had messed up, she was sure of it. She had messed up, and said too much, and now they would never want to see her again and Twilight would drift away and Applejack would have been totally misreading Rarity and none of them would be friends anymore and—
“Okay, Rainbow Dash,” said Pinkie suddenly, “that’s like super-duper interesting! And Fluttershy and I are going to go down there and talk about it for a minute – just a minute or two! – and then we’ll be right back and have an answer for you!”
“We just need to talk,” said Fluttershy, her voice gentle, “but we really will come right back and please don’t be worried.”
Pinkie Pie scratched Rainbow Dash’s colorful mane, and then they both descended to the park below – Fluttershy flapping slowly earthward, and Pinkie Pie making an enormous leap and ending up in the river by mistake – while Rainbow Dash sat there with no idea what was going on. Talk? What in Equestria did they need to talk about? How much of a jerk she was? Why the hay had she even come here to begin with? She wasn’t here to be loyal; she was here because she was incredibly selfish and wanted everything to go her way. This was all wrong. If she acted quickly enough she could be out of this tree, maybe even out of Ponyville before they noticed, and all her friends could be happy without her screwing things up for them and—
“Hi again Rainbow Dash!”
Right. There was basically no way she’d be able to escape Ponyville without Pinkie Pie being magically able to track her down. And, somehow, being completely dry despite falling into the river just a few seconds ago. Time to face the music, then. “Hi, Pinkie.”
“All right,” said Pinkie, who was once again in the tree without Rainbow Dash having the faintest idea of how she had gotten there. “We’re going to tell you kind of a weird idea, and it would be really great if you could wait until we’re done before you say anything, okay?” She winked. “I mean, I know I tell you weird ideas all the time, sometimes while you’re trying to sleep, sometimes while I’m trying to sleep, but this one is kinda weird even for me! But that’s okay, because it might be super awesome as well as just weird, like the time I thought to mix lemon ice cream with artichokes and Rarity thought I had gone completely loco” – her eyes rolled around in her head illustratively – “and then—“
“Pinkie,” said Rainbow Dash, “I get it. I like super awesome ideas. What’s up?”
“Well…” said Pinkie, “Fluttershy and I… we’re not necessarily exclusive, I guess. Does that make sense?”
“Pinkie,” said Fluttershy, once again hovering nearby them, “you told her not to say anything until we were done explaining.”
“Oh, right! I totally did do that, didn’t I? Okay, I’ll just assume that made sense, then. I’m not saying we’re in a totally open relationship, because we’re not, but it wouldn’t be impossible if I wanted to see you too. And you’re, like, super cute and cool and exciting and I love doing stuff with you, so I don’t see why not!”
Fluttershy smiled softly. “Pinkie has a very big heart,” she said, “and there’s room for a lot of love in there.”
“So do you, Flutters!”
“Thank you, Pinkie. You see, Rainbow Dash… Pinkie and I are very happy together so far. We’d been close for a long time, and she’s good for me, and I think I’m good for her too.” Pinkie gave her a wordless nuzzle by way of response. “But she can be a very, um, energetic pony, and I’m really not, and we’ve both worried that she might try to change herself in order to accommodate me. One idea we had is that it would be good for Pinkie to have another major pony in her life, somepony who’s a little bit more active than I am, so she can feel totally comfortable with who she is. Um, like she should! We were kind of stuck at figuring out who that pony could be, though, and what Pinkie’s relationship with them would be, and how that relationship would relate to our relationship, and… well, we were kind of stuck.”
“But the good kind of stuck,” said Pinkie, “with lots of makeouts!”
“Um. Aheh.”
“So then you showed up!” continued Pinkie. “And Fluttershy and I looked at each other and thought, hey, wait a minute, Rainbow Dash is totally a super active pony, and I like her, and apparently she likes me, and why don’t we do this with her? I can be in a relationship with both of you and then everypony will be happy all the time forever!”
“And Rainbow Dash,” said Fluttershy, “please understand that this is very important and we probably wouldn’t offer this to anypony else. Pinkie likes you a lot, and you’re my very oldest friend in all of Equestria, and that’s why we can trust you with this. I think a lot of ponies in this position would try to take Pinkie from me, but I don’t think you’re like that. I think Pinkie Pie can be in love with me, and she can be in love with you, and those can be two separate things and that’s something we can both be okay with.”
“We don’t really have any of the details worked out yet,” said Pinkie, “but I did some quick math and I took the number of makeouts I’m getting now, and if I was in a relationship with you too, I’d get roughly twice that number! So what do you say?”
Rarity leant eagerly forward. “And? What did you say?”
“Guess.”
The white unicorn pursed her lips in obvious thought. The two of them were in the main chamber of the Carousel Boutique, where, for reasons she was still not entirely clear on, Rainbow Dash had flown immediately after talking to Pinkie and Fluttershy. Rarity, seeing that her friend needed to talk, had shooed her customers out of the building with coupons for their next visit and hung a large “CLOSED” sign across the door, and Rainbow Dash was enjoying the resultant peace and quiet.
“I suppose,” she said at last, “that you weighed the many and varied pros and cons of the situation, and thought over your long history with Fluttershy, and were very touched by her trust in you, and…”
Rainbow Dash burst out laughing. “Nah! I just said yes right away. I mean, seriously, Rare! A few hours ago I had given up all hope of getting a relationship with Pinkie – or, well, I think I had, it’s kind of hard to tell – and then they said I could have one anyway! Of course I was going to agree! But now I get the feeling I’ve entered into some sort of super-complicated super-emotional super-difficult agreement with a couple of my best friends and I don’t even know what to call it.”
“Polyamory.”
Rainbow Dash blinked at Rarity. “Come again?”
“Polyamory. What you’re trying to build with Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy is called a polyamorous relationship.”
“Okay,” said Rainbow Dash, “fine. So I know what it’s called. But what I really need to know is how I’m going to make it work!”
“Yes,” said Rarity, “quite. Well, darling, I will of course do anything in my power to help, but I must confess to being somewhat at a loss as to why you came to me. What makes me so much more qualified than our other friends to advise you?”
Rainbow Dash, who was still not entirely sure why her subconscious had led her there either, considered. “Umm… well, I already talked to Applejack,” she said. “She’d just tell me to kick things. Girl thought I might have a crush on Fluttershy, of all ponies!”
Rarity’s laughter filled the room like a wind chime. “Oh, please! Anypony with a lick of sense in her head could see the way you looked at Pinkie. In fact, I believe I have won ten bits on the matter… although, ah, I certainly shan’t tell you from whom!” She glanced at Rainbow Dash’s skeptical expression, and rushed quickly ahead. “But what about dear Twilight? She is, after all, the only one of the three of us who is actually in a relationship just now, to say nothing of a happy, healthy one.”
Rainbow Dash frowned. It had been tough to get so much as an opinion out of Applejack, but Rarity was already proving quite cutting with her questions, and they had barely even touched on the issue she was actually there about. “Well,” she said slowly, “I guess… that’s kind of the problem. I mean, she’s in a relationship with Colgate.”
“Rainbow Dash,” said Rarity, her eyes narrowing, “if you are here to deride Twilight’s choice of romantic partner, I’m afraid I am going to have to ask you to leave, no matter your present troubles. What I have seen of Colgate suggests only that she is a lovely mare, and Twilight seems very happy.”
“What? No, no, that’s not what I mean!” Rainbow Dash looked nervously at Rarity and saw the unicorn was clearly still unconvinced. “It’s nothing about who Colgate is, it’s that she’s not one of us! I mean, the six of us have been friends for quite a while now, and here I am proposing to get into some kind of relationship with not one, but two of our friends? I guess I’m worried that she might take that as some sort of… rebuke. For, like, daring to go outside the group for romance. Not that I believe that, but what if she took it that way?”
Rarity’s expression softened. “Well, that makes a little more sense, I suppose. But that’s only three of us. I’m sure you’re aware that I have had various… connections in the past few years, however short-lived. Why would Twilight come to such a conclusion?”
“Sure, yeah,” said Rainbow Dash, “but what about you and…” She stopped. Rainbow Dash was hardly a tactful pony, but in this case she was immediately aware that she had said too much. She hoped she was imagining it, though she could never be sure when dealing with unicorns, but she got a definite feeling that the room around them had just gotten a little bit darker. In addition, she suddenly noticed that every window in the building appeared to be locked.
“Yes, darling?” asked Rarity, her voice dangerous in its extreme politeness. “Was there something you were going to say?”
“Huh? Oh, no, no! You know me, always shooting off at the mouth, can’t believe everything you hear…”
“Really? Because it sounded to me for a moment there as if, perhaps, you had access to some information that I would be dearly interested in hearing about. Concerning, perhaps, a mutual acquaintance of ours?”
“Aheh, nope! Same old insensitive Rainbow Dash, doesn’t know a thing about how any of her friends are feeling. And you know what, I can tell you’re very busy today” – she did her best to ignore the completely empty building, which seemed to be getting even darker – “so maybe I had better just be going, I mean, I’m sure I can figure out this stuff with Pinkie and Fluttershy all my own.”
“Oh, Rainbow Dash,” said Rarity, her voice now kind instead of terrifying. “Please. Fluttershy is my very closest friend, and the two of you saved my life. You have saved my life on your own as well, even when you had precious little reason to do so, and Pinkie… is a very distinctive individual. I wish all of you nothing but the purest of happiness and am honored to offer you whatever help and advice I can. That said,” and her demeanor changed completely, “I would still be interested in knowing what it was you were going to say just now.”
Rainbow Dash’s mind raced in search of a way out. “Well, maybe I don’t want to tell you!” she said, somewhat lamely. “Maybe… maybe I made a Pinkie Promise not to! Huh? Ever thought of that?”
“Darling, darling, darling. Darling. Let me remind you that I am a unicorn, and I can lock any door or window you might think to exit from long before you could reach it. Moreover, I have an extensive collection of outfits that I would find perfectly divine on you but which you, I’m sure, would completely detest. And oh my, just think of the wonderful publicity for the both of us if I were to take a few photographs with this camera that I conveniently happen to have! With your distinctive coloring, my designs could appear on the front page of every magazine in Equestria! – more than they already do, of course – and your name too could make its way to the lips of high society, for how well styled you are.” An incredibly elaborate dress began to levitate its way into Rainbow Dash’s field of vision. “Now, we can do this the easy way or we can do this the fabulous way.”
“OKAY!” Rainbow Dash practically exploded upward before coming to a halt five or six feet above Rarity, her wings flapping in extreme agitation. Around her, the room returned to its natural levels of lighting. “Okay, fine! I’ll tell you! You win! But first we have to talk about my problems, or otherwise you’re going to start mooning over whoever it is and this whole stupid visit will be completely wasted.”
“I,” said Rarity, “do not moon. Still, I see your point! You came here with a purpose, and it is my duty – nay, my privilege – as your friend to assist you.” She looked genuinely contrite. “I’m sorry, Rainbow Dash, truly. How can I help you?”
Rainbow Dash allowed herself to descend slowly back down to the boutique floor, still wary for further danger signs. “Well…” she began, noticing that she did not actually have an answer for that question. “You just said how close you and Fluttershy are, and I’m sure she uses you as a confy… confidante?” Rarity nodded. “And, y’know, I’ve been kinda out of the loop for the past few days. Can you tell me about her and Pinkie Pie? If we’re both going after the same girl, I should know something about the other side.”
Rarity sighed. “Rainbow Dash… you’re not going after the same girl.”
“Huh?”
“No. Look, polyamory was quite in vogue a few months ago, so I have a little sense of how this works. There’s not really such a thing as a ‘normal’ polyamorous relationship – although, I suspect there is no such thing as a ‘normal’ monogamous relationship either, surprising as that might be – but it is important that the relationship be stable and consensual. You and Fluttershy aren’t “going after” Pinkie Pie, because you both already have her. And, moreover, you are both constantly and completely okay with the other having her.”
Rainbow Dash scratched the back of her head in embarrassment. “Heh… yeah. Sorry, I guess that was a bad choice of words. You’re right! I’ve totally got Pinkie, and Fluttershy does too, and everything’s awesome!”
“Lovely. Now, dear, I really should be sure… this relationship of yours, it is a single line with three points, yes? Or perhaps two lines, but certainly not a triangle?”
Rainbow Dash repeated her earlier “huh?”
“You and Fluttershy are not planning to fall in love, too, are you? Pinkie Pie is the only really polyamorous one in the relationship?”
“Psssh, yeah!” said Rainbow Dash. “Can you imagine me and Fluttershy together?”
“No,” said Rarity smugly, “I have a little more romantic sense than our dear Applejack. But let’s talk about Fluttershy, shall we? I can tell you what she has told me about Pinkie Pie, because I can’t imagine any of it should be held private from you, given your new arrangement. Although that does raise the question: why don’t you simply ask her yourself?”
“Huh. Um…”
“Take your time.”
Rainbow Dash grunted. She hated it when her friends knew more about something than her and made a point of showing it off. “I guess… I guess I don’t know how I’m supposed to treat her now,” she said. “Like, what is she? She’s not my lover, but she’s not exactly my friend, at least not in this context.”
“No?”
“No! …yes? Maybe?”
Rarity laughed softly. “Oh, my poor, brave Rainbow Dash. I only wish I had answers for you. I don’t think Fluttershy will ever stop being your friend, but she may well have to be something more. Something… in addition. Something that I don’t think anypony but the two of you, or else the three of you, can or should try to define. Never, ever hate her, Rainbow Dash. The girl you love is in love with Fluttershy, and that must always be something you must accept, or better, be happy about. Pinkie’s time with Fluttershy is a good thing for you, whether or not you’ll ever comprehend that.”
Rainbow Dash glared at her. “Wait a minute,” she said after a moment’s consideration, “I know what’s going on here.”
“I beg your pardon?”
“This is just like Applejack all over again. Her idea of a plan was for me to be Honest with Pinkie, and now here you are telling me to be Generous with Pinkie. Right?”
Rarity looked thoughtful for several seconds. “Rainbow Dash,” she asked, “what do you think Generosity is?”
“Giving stuff away! Like when you made us all dresses, or that other time you made us all dresses, or…”
“Yes, well,” said Rarity with an embarrassed cough, “we do all stick to what we know, I suppose. If I didn’t make you dresses, would we still be friends?”
“Of course! Come on, Rare, what kind of dumb question is that? We’d have to be pretty awful to be your friends only because you give us stuff.”
“Exactly. But Generosity is supposed to be one of the Elements of Harmony, one of the core components of this elusive Friendship. So what should I be doing with it?” For the first time, Rainbow Dash noticed that her friend seemed no longer entirely confident about the conversation. Maybe she wasn’t fishing for one particular answer anymore. “I suppose that to be Generous is to put aside one’s own interests. But if I give you a dress” – she giggled at Rainbow Dash’s look of skepticism – “or get rid of some customers so that I can talk to you, or rearrange my schedule to spend time with Sweetie Belle, or anything like that, I’m not really putting aside my own interests. I do things because I want to do them! Helping you is so much more valuable than a few bits here or there. Really, Rainbow Dash, either I have the easiest element of them all, or else I have the hardest and I simply don’t know what it is I’m supposed to be doing.”
Rainbow Dash decided to risk giving her friend one of her rare compliments. “Well, you’re doing a pretty bang-up job as far as I can tell.”
“Thank you,” said Rarity, sounding completely genuine. “I guess, Rainbow Dash, my point is… no. No, I don’t think you should be Generous with dear Pinkie Pie, lest you think that letting her spend time with Fluttershy is somehow bad for you. If you love this girl, as you tell me you do, you want her to be happy above all things, and you and I both know that spending time with the ponies she loves is the very best way to make Pinkie Pie happy. I suppose what you should do is be Loyal to her.”
“Huh,” said Rainbow Dash. “So what you’re saying is I should be myself!”
“Oh, heavens no! You should be somepony much smarter and more sensitive than that.”
Rainbow Dash flared her wings, ready to fight, but stopped when she saw the fashionista unicorn laughing merrily. After a few seconds of mild fuming, she began to laugh as well, eventually heading over to nuzzle Rarity affectionately. She forgot sometimes how much fun all of her friends could be.
Something caught her attention from the corner of her eye, and Rainbow Dash looked out the front window. “Hey, I should go, Rarity,” she said. “Looks like you’ve got a customer.”
Rarity frowned. “I closed the boutique so that we could talk, Rainbow Dash. Unless you think we’re done here?”
“Well, it’s not just any customer,” said Rainbow Dash, moving aside so that Rarity could peek out the window herself. Along the pathway to the boutique was walking Applejack, a look of frightened determination on her face, holding in her mouth what Rainbow Dash strongly suspected was exactly ten bits’ worth of Roseluck’s best.
Beside her, Rarity froze up. “Rainbow Dash,” she said faintly, “listen to me very closely. You are going to go outside and talk to Applejack for no less than three minutes, which time I will use to freshen myself up. If she asks, you will say nothing of our discussion. At the end of those three minutes, you will allow her to enter, and then you will leave. Immediately and with no caveats. Am I making myself clear?”
“Crystal,” said Rainbow Dash with a grin. “Good luck!”
As she approached the door, she was suddenly waylaid by Rarity engulfing her in an enormous hug that completely cut off her ability to breathe. “Roses!” said the unicorn. “She’s bringing me red roses! Rainbow Dash, I have no idea what you said to that impossible farmer, but it worked! Thank you, and oh Rainbow Dash, good luck to you too!”
With that she fled into the depths of the Carousel Boutique, leaving Rainbow Dash to fly outside, bemused, and narrate once again the story of her meeting with Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie.