Synch

by sunnypack


43 - Twilight: Twilight Anaesthesia (Part 2)

When Synch touched the world, not everyone was enthusiastic with the prospect of embracing this new technology. Some people were just intensely paranoid. Synch would give you brain cancer it’s like dipping your head into a cocktail of radiation. I agreed with them. So would be using your smart phone, standing near your router, standing near your computer, standing near your power line and basically anything electrically based. I laughed at their paranoia, what hypocrites, if they stood in the sun for more than ten minutes, they would get more radiation than Synch gear would give out in a year.

However, they weren’t the issue. The issue were those that thoroughly believed that Grooble was taking over the world, that soon our lives would be one corporate nightmare. Though I didn’t want to admit it, I could see the potential for disaster when they so well laid-out the information through ironically, the Grooble-run extranet.

It was only minor things that happened. A raid on their warehouses here. Server down time there. Nobody took their group seriously.

At least until Synchrony hit.

I was unaware of the growing problem on Earth, stuck in the world of ponies and the Universe knows what. Then again, I was unaware that on Earth, the problem of Synchrony had already been solved and I had no need to head back.

Celestia was seated in front of me and I had been told the true extent of the problem of a null being.

At first, I was sceptical.

How could I become the antithesis of all magic in this world? I didn’t know much about it much less knew the extent of my effects on it. But ignorance was no excuse for responsibility and being ignorant of the laws of a nature did not belie its truth.

So I accepted it and also wondered at the complexity of a new discipline.

“…so that is how we had drawn our conclusions, any questions?”

I was about to say something before Celestia cocked her head and smiled. She gently put up a hoof to stop my query and gestured silence with a hoof on her mouth.

“Twilight, you may stop skulking around there and come in”, she called.

I watched in bemusement as Twilight edged in with the bearing of a guilty child who had stolen from the cookie jar. She kind of looked like my dog, back when he was alive, when he knew he had done something bad.

I reminisced about my family, feeling bittersweet about my recollection.

Twilight and Celestia were engaging about a date and I couldn’t resist throwing a word or two in to embarrass Twilight further, to which Celestia had been game for, at least for a while.

When Twilight had stopped stammering, I decided to cut her some slack. My thoughts unexpectedly drifted back to one of our first meetings.

“Oh and one more thing, you asked about my species, right?” I asked, getting back a nod. “I’m human.”

Twilight had cocked her head to the side. She really did look like my dog! I stifled the urge to rub her on the head.

“What’s a human?” she asked innocently.

Oh, well I’ve never had to explain that question before so I went to default annoying.

“That’s what I am”, I replied.

Twilight rolled her eyes.

“Okaaaay, I think that’s all I’m going to get out of you”, she groaned but then dismissed that part of the conversation for a later date. Her gaze settled on the Princess who had been seated silently through the exchange with a little smile of bemusement present on her muzzle.

“Princess, if I may ask a question?” Twilight directed at Princess Celestia.

Celestia laughed lightly.

“Oh my dear Twilight, you need not be so formal around me”, she said good-naturedly.

Before Twilight could reply I cut in, “Could I be less formal?”

Twilight and Princess Celestia both spoke at the same time.

“I don’t see why not-“, Celestia stated at the same time that Twilight frowned and said.

“No.”

I grinned.

“Princess trumps student, I’d say”, I teased, leaning back in my chair in contentment.

Twilight was learning to pick her own battles.

“Back to our original topic, Princess”, she began, shooting me a glance to keep silent. I locked my mouth and threw away the key. I don’t know… something about Twilight just makes me want to tease her.

“If I may, would you be so kind to reveal what the both of you were discussing”, she continued, then cleared her throat uncertainly. “If that’s okay with you, Princess.”

Ha, she’s more Fluttershy than Twilight, I thought, then I revised that thought.

I don’t know actually, Fluttershy seemed shy but maybe she carries some kind of inner strength?

I paused to consider that statement.

Nah.

-----

Meanwhile, about two weeks ago in the Everfree forest, Fluttershy was staring down three cockatrices at once.

“Now listen here misters. I don’t want to find you anywhere near my friends or I will straighten you out, got it?” she growled, holding her ground.

The three cockatrices quickly made themselves scarce.

Fluttershy briefly took the time to reign in her murderous aura.

“That’s better”, she said, shyly. She trotted nonchalantly back along the path to her cottage.

-----

Twilight and Celestia had been conversing for a while but I had tuned out. Nostalgically I was listening to a brain-feed version of ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ by Queen that really fit the occasion.

Descartes eat your heart out, I thought snidely with a small grimace.

Celestia and Twilight were looking at me funny when I broke my reverie.

“Yes”, I said in response to their questioning looks.

Twilight face-hoofed whilst Celestia let out an uncharacteristic giggle.

I decided to inject a little more humour into their lives.

“Wait I wasn’t supposed to talk right? Dang, there I go again!” I babbled trying to cover my mouth. “It just won’t stop! Oh, well it seems the dam has burst, you’re going to have to tell me everything to shut me up.”

Twilight rolled her eyes while Celestia gave me a surreptitious wink.

“If you keep going on like that Twilight, your eyes will roll out of their sockets”, I deadpanned.

Twilight made to point to roll her eyes again at me. Rude! I was only trying to help. Eye rolling could become a serious condition.

“As I was saying”, Twilight began, whilst flicking a hoof at me. “We were asking you about how you would feel about going to the Crystal Empire.”

“Wait, what?” I asked in confusion. “What does the Crystal Empire have to do with me?”

Princess Celestia smiled warmly.

“Twilight and I think it is a good idea. We will need to make preparations over here to try and send you back, without harming you”, she explained.

“Still not getting how the Crystal Empire factors into this”, I confessed, still in puzzlement.

Celestia chuckled.

“Did you not want to see the good aspects of Equestria? The Crystal Empire is a shining example of hope and beauty within Equestrian hooves”, she said.

I didn’t buy it.

“I have a sneaking suspicion that you’re telling me you want to judge Equestria, outside of Equestria…” I accused, narrowing my eyes at the Princess.

Celestia cleared her throat softly while Twilight gave a stifled laugh. Celestia rolled her eyes at Twilight until she bowed her head sheepishly.

“I honestly didn’t think you would catch that”, she admitted, this time it was her moment to look sheepish. “Actually, the matter is a little complicated and political in nature.”

I glanced at Celestia questioningly.

“If the nobles or skies forbid, the media got their hooves on you it could bring chaos and mass-panic among the populace”, she clarified, dropping her teacup with a soft clink on the last word, as if to emphasise the gravity of the situation.

“I believe it is best to let Princess Cadance and Prince Shining Armor handle this while we continue to do research. That way if anypony gathers a whiff of what is going on, you will be out of reach until we need you”, she continued, giving me a glance that suggested she was willing to hear my input on the matter.

“I guess I shouldn’t get in the way of what you think is best, dear ruler”, I sighed.

“Of course, you will not be unaccompanied. You will have Twilight and her friends, some guards and also Princess Luna with you”, she offered, as a way to appease my reluctance.

I nodded, starting to like this proposition better. The matter of getting home was taken care of and I got to see some sights at least.

“Are you sure there is nothing I could do here”, I asked, feeling a little guilty that I wasn’t actively helping me get myself back home.

Celestia shook her head, I was still getting used to the fact that her mane swayed only slightly when she did so. Mesmerising.

“By your own admission, you claimed you know nothing about magic and this is a problem for magic”, she said gently.

I nodded, I had told her I knew nothing about magic, besides…

How bad could this be? I thought.

But as everyone knows, as soon as you even think that, disaster was bound to fall.