//------------------------------// // Ch. 2: A Rival Appears // Story: TAL (Tuesday Afternoon Live) Juxtaposition // by TundraStanza //------------------------------// "I have to do this for how long? Ugggh..." "I would rather do anything else. Anything!" ... "Wait, no. Not that. I'll just keep doing what I'm doing then." As the theme song played, Sunset Shimmer swallowed her dose of pain medication for the inevitable headache she was sure to experience. The audience gave their approving applause and cheers as the camera panned around to the show's host. "Welcome back to Juxtaposition," she said, "Contrary to popular belief, my mane color is natural. With that out of the way, let's introduce our contestants properly." The number had been cut in half from six ponies from the week prior. Three stood behind the stand-up desks with hoof-written names on the front. Two out of the three were smiling, though not necessarily out of the purity of happy hearts. Either way, Shimmer motioned toward the first pony on the end. "Mr. Trenderhoof surpassed my expectations by holding a steady score of negative one thousand and two hundred bits." The crowd laughed at the implications of that statement. "Hm, yes," the stallion said happily, "Thank you for having me, Ms. Shimmer. I believe this is the second rarest game show set I have ever laid my eyes upon." As per the light-up prompt, about half of the audience managed to force a coughing laugh after he said that. "You keep using that word 'rare'," commented Shimmer. "I don't really think that means what you seem to believe it means." She cleared her throat. "Next, we have Fleur who currently holds the highest Juxtaposition positive record of five bits." Some of the audience laughed while the rest cheered and whistled. "I don't know how you could get five bits when all of the scores are multiples of one hundred, but I guess that's show business for you." "It certainly is, Sunset." Fleur smirked. She rested her hooves on the desk flat-side up and her head on top of that. A few of the ponies in the audience hooped and hollered at the mere sight. "You stay where you are," ordered Shimmer. "Finally, with a score of negative ten thousand bits is Trixie Lulamoon." The crowd squealed in delight upon her mention. There was even a low deep voice that shouted, "Have my children!" "Soon you will all see that the Great and Powerful Trixie can't be held down by four measly zeroes," said Trixie while sliding a hoof along the brim of her hat. "Especially you, Shimmer." "Wonderful." Shimmer deadpanned. "Without further ado, let's move onto Double Juxtaposition. Take a look at the categories." Upon the board, the squares turned around one by one. Each was highlighted by an audible ding as Shimmer read the words out loud. "Important Portrayals." "Famous Treasure Hunters." "Villains That Exploded At The End Of Their Two-Part Special." "The Wielder Of The Element Of Honesty." "The Number Four." "Spike's Nicknames." "Since I feel sorry for the underdog," said Shimmer as she turned back to the contestants, "we'll let Trixie choose the first category." "But of course." Trixie levitated her hat and tipped it before placing it back on her noggin. "The Great and Powerful Trixie always goes first. She will choose Revenge Against Sparkle for one thousand." The audience laughed when they saw Shimmer's unamused expression. "Trixie, that is not a category. It wasn't a category. It will never be a category." "You cannot hide Sparkle from Trixie forever, Shimmer!" announced Trixie, "You can only make Sparkle run." Shimmer shook her head. "I no longer feel sorry for you. Fleur, please select a category and a bit number." "Hmm." Fleur stroked her mane with her eyes closed. "The number of Eastern death speaks on beautiful breezes today. The Number Four for four hundred, if you'd be so kind." "At least that was competent." Shimmer breathed easy before pulling the card. "This is the number of hooves you have." The audience chuckled and snickered. A buzzer rang. "Mr. Trend," addressed Shimmer. "That reminds me," said Trenderhoof, "I've been meaning to write a new book all about the most soothing of massaging techniques and hoof rubs. Would you like to hear me explain the premise?" The timer rang three times. "Is it too late to bring Tidy and Lucy back?" asked Shimmer more to herself than anypony else. A new buzzer rang. "Ms. Lulamoon?" "My proper title, if you please," scoffed Trixie. "It's too much of a mouthful for the limited time that we have," Shimmer said. "What it is," said Trixie, "is a privilege to be used by all who are less great and less powerful than the Great and Powerful Trixie." The timer rang three times. Trixie's reaction was a surprised widening of her eyes. "You see what I mean?" asked Shimmer rhetorically. The third buzzer rang. "Fleur!" exclaimed Shimmer. "I only need one to do this." Fleur made a kissy noise into her hoof and then blew out toward the audience. A fraction of the sitting ponies fell backwards in bright pink delight. "And here I was hoping that a charity would actually get some money," Shimmer said with a shake of her head. "It is still your board, Fleur. Please choose a category." Fleur stroked her mane. "Hmm, that Spike Ess Nicknames is very curious." "That's Spike's Nicknames," corrected Shimmer. "Spike's. Nicknames. Here's the answer: 'This is the nickname that Twilight called Spike after his first crushing gaze of Rarity'." Fleur pressed the button to her buzzer. "Juliet?" "That is incorrect," said Shimmer with disappointment. Trixie followed up with her buzzer. "Lizard Boy." A deeper buzzer blared briefly. "No," said Shimmer. "Well, that's what that thing is," insisted Trixie. Some of the audience laughed in agreement. "No, Trixie," restated Shimmer. Trenderhoof applied his buzzer. "Tell me what you think of this line: 'Oh, Juliet. Fair Juliet. Why must your name be Juliet?'" Shimmer put a hoof to her face. "That was dreadful." She turned back to the board and sighed. "Why don't we just go for Villains That Exploded At The End Of Their Two-Part Special for two thousand? There's no way any of you could get this wrong." She pulled the card and read it. "Say, 'King Sombra'." The audience got a good laugh out of their systems because of that. Trixie rang her buzzer. "Twilight Sparkle will be sure to explode in defeat once I've surpassed her and make her rue the day that she drove me into hiding!" "I am this close to ripping your mouth off with duct tape," hissed Shimmer. After ringing her buzzer, Fleur fluffed her mane with both of her front hooves. "Queen Chrysalis landed pretty far away after the explosion in Canterlot." "She didn't actually explode, Fleur," said Shimmer, "She was caught in the explosion." "Oh." Fleur gave a pouty face to the camera. By prompt command, the audience cooed and let out an elongated 'awww'. Trenderhoof interrupted with a ring of his own. "Would it be possible for me to buy a vowel?" The audience laughed at his confusion. "Unbelievable." Shimmer shook her head. "Maybe choosing an answer from The Wielder Of The Element Of Honesty will let one of you break even." She expressed her doubt in the form of a sigh before reading the card. "This Apple Family member is a 'jack' of many trades and was chosen to wield the Element of Honesty." No sound but a pin dropping could be heard. The time-up beeper sounded three times. "Applejack," enunciated Shimmer, "Applejack. The wielder of Honesty is Applejack." "Well, you've got cards in front of you with the answers!" retorted Trixie. The audience laughed. Shimmer squinted her eyes and opened her mouth in disbelief. "You've known those ponies longer than I have. You don't have an excuse." She shook her head. "Let's move onto Final Juxtaposition. The category is... you know what?" She magically ripped up the card she was carrying. "The category is Shapes. Draw any shape you want with your pen." The show's theme played overhead and in surround-sound. "It can be a circle. It can be a triangle. Heck, you could even draw a few disconnected lines. I'd still accept that." The audience chortled at her exasperated tone. The time came to an end and the lights turned back on. "I guess it's time to see the reasons for my alcohol abuse tonight," said Shimmer much to the amusement of the crowd. "Trenderhoof, you seem fairly pleased with yourself. What did you draw?" Trenderhoof's board came up on screen with a large wall of text. "This looks like the beginning of a book chapter." The audience laughed. "And your wager was... the rest of the chapter continued." The audience laughed again. "Can you believe it only took me fifteen seconds?" said Trenderhoof happily. "Remarkable." Shimmer deadpanned before trotting to the next desk. "Fleur drew... absolutely nothing." Indeed the board was completely blank. Fleur was currently busy laying on her side on top of her desk while looking at the audience like a temptress. Her lips mouthed a phrase that barely whispered, "Draw me like one of your Prench ponies." To that, the audience hooped and hollered. At least two ponies howled like wild animals. "I guess I can add bleach to the things on my drink list tonight," muttered Shimmer before moving along. "Trixie, you look very serious right now. You have me worried. Let's see what you drew." Trixie's board showed for the home viewers to see. "Oh, wow, a five-pointed star!" exclaimed Shimmer, "You actually did what I asked you to do? That's amazing!" A full crowd's laughter responded to Shimmer's excitement. She cleared her throat. "And your wager is..." The two boards on top of each other revealed a very crude illustration that used the aforementioned star as only a small part. "This is a picture of Twilight Sparkle lying underneath your hooves." Some of the audience laughed while the rest cheered. One even shouted, "Yeah, Trixie!" Shimmer sighed and turned to the camera one last time. "Thank you for watching Juxtaposition. I feel like spiking my own drink now. Good night." As the host trotted away, Trixie made some taunting motions with her hooves. It was like she was daring Sunset Shimmer to come back. But the audience paid no heed and mindlessly clapped and cheered for the show.