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// Chapter 2: Another Donut, Extra Sprinkles (old) 
// Story: Agent Con Mane in Doctor Ironhoof (Under Revision) 
// by Fairytail 
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	Canterlot. The capital city of the Kingdom of Equestria. The city was known for its stunning architecture and its unmistakable silhouette on the side of Canterlot Mountain. However on this night all eyes were on Canterlot Castle, the home of Princess Celestia herself. Magical fireworks of every color of the rainbow danced in the sky as the front gates opened themselves to the hundreds of ponies that were lucky enough to be invited to the most anticipated event of the year: the Grand Galloping Gala.
But not everypony who was invited to the Gala attended. There was one pony who decided instead to tear up the golden ticket, and go to work just as he always did. A few blocks away from the Castle Grounds, sitting on the edge between the nobles’ quarters and the shopping district, on the corner of Celestia Avenue and Harmony Street, sat a lovely little donut shop.
Plush, red vinyl seats and cream colored tables lined the large windowed wall of the shop. Fluorescent lighting that was probably in need of replacing made the inside of the cozy restaurant visible from blocks away. And, most importantly, the irresistible smell of freshly baked donuts and other baked goods entranced anypony who walked by, enticing them to enter the establishment. However, because of the celebrations surrounding the Gala, the streets, and the donut shop, were empty. A jukebox sat in the corner of the room playing a soothing jazz song designed to take the patrons back in time to better days. The only patron in the establishment on the night of the Gala, however, was a small, purple Baby Dragon. The Dragon sat at the counter on an old fashioned bar stool with his head resting in his hands and his elbows on the countertop. In front of him sat the remains of a devoured donut. The proprietor of the donut shop looked at the Dragon with concern. He had seen many customers like this before- wallowing in their own self pity with comforting food.
“Hey, Pony Joe! Another Donut!” The Dragon said bitterly.
Donut Joe sighed to himself. He didn't mind that the Dragon got his name wrong. Being the easy target of an angry customer came with the territory, after all.
Joe said, “Don’t you think you've had enough?”
“Another Donut! Extra Sprinkles!” The Baby Dragon slammed his fist on the counter which rattled the empty plate. Joe cleared his throat and walked over to his oven. His horn, which was mostly hidden by his messy, unkempt mane, glowed with emerald green Unicorn Magic. He levitated the scalding sheet of piping hot donuts out of the oven and placed them on the cooling tray. He took a nice, long whiff of the greatest smell in the universe. His bliss was interrupted by the sound of the bell that hung from his door. A purple Unicorn walked in wearing the remains of a fancy Gala dress that had definitely seen better days. 
“Twilight Sparkle!” Joe yelled out to the filly, “Long time no see!”
Twilight didn’t respond but that was fine. She probably just didn't remember Joe. Joe thought back to how Twilight used to live in Canterlot until she moved away about a year ago. From what Joe was told, she had moved to the New Lunar Republic. Joe remembered that the Baby Dragon, Spike, had always been her one and only friend. It pained his heart to see her still alone after all this time. He hoped she would have found some friends in her new home. 
When Spike saw Twilight his eyes immediately brightened up and he ran to her. “Hey how was the Gala?” he asked, “How was your best night ever?”
Joe laughed to himself. Judging from that tattered dress, he thought, I’d say it was probably the worst night ever. Joe imagined all the posh and moneys Unicorns of Canterlot and military Pegasi with their muzzles in the air and designr saddles on their backs. As far as Joe was concerned, the only things worth a stallion’s time at that shin-dig were all the pretty mares.
After Twilight had ordered her donut, it became apparent to Joe that nopony else would be showing up. As he cleaned the countertop one last time before closing, he heard his bell ring once again. Joe looked up expecting to see Twilight Sparkle and Spike walking out the door. He was surprised to see a new pony walk in. She was a mare with a deep, dark red coat and a blue-black mane. Her mane fell over one of her eyes, drawing attention to her other ice-blue eye. Her tail was styled in a wave that danced a little when she flicked it. She wore a pearl white dress expertly tailored to show off just the right amount of leg and flank. She stared straight at Joe, but looked tired and distant. Joe gave her his most charming smile and tried to slick back his greasy mane with his hoof, but it wouldn't stay. The red mare sat down at the counter in the same spot that Spike previously occupied.
“Welcome to Joe’s Double-O Donuts!” Joe tried to sound as welcoming as possible but the mare's eye only drifted to the side. Joe decided to change tactics and go straight for the compliment. He whistled and said, “Well, well, aren't you a pretty filly? I take it you’re new in town? You know I never forget a face. ‘specially one as beautiful as yours.” The mare placed her gaze back on Joe, but her emotionless frown still had not changed. “So,” Joe continued, “you here for the Gala, I take it? I bet a Unicorn as pretty as you turned all kinds of heads, amiright? I bet you’d even get the Princess’ attention, eh?” Joe chuckled at himself. The mare apparently didn't find the joke funny.
“I had to leave.” She talked! Well at least that was a start. “The Canterlot elite are a little too stuck up for my taste. I prefer an atmosphere that’s a little… darker.” Her eye squinted a little as she stared at Joe and her mouth curved into something resembling a smile. Joe felt beads of sweat accumulate under his ears. “Not to mention,” She continued, “the ballroom was overrun with wild animals.”
She continued to stare at the wall with vacant disinterest. Joe scratched his head at the comments.
“Sounds like it was one heck of a party.” Joe said, “Still not the kind of place for an ugly mug like mine”
The mare actually smiled and giggled as she looked back at Joe. A little self-detrimental humor usually got the fillies on his side. And Joe was telling the truth, to an extent. His mane was messy and uncontrollable, his muzzle was far too rounded and he had amassed an impressive girth from eating too many donuts over the years. His cream colored coat and brown mane surely weren't catching a lot of attention and the bright pink donut that adorned his flank clashed horribly with his emerald green eyes. Joe learned long ago that charm was his greatest asset.
“I don’t know,” said the mare as she measured Joe up and down with her icy stare. “I think you would be rather cute if you cleaned yourself up a bit.”
“Well ain't you a charmer?” Joe laughed as he walked over to the cooling donuts on the rack. “Here, have a bear claw on the house.”
The free donut. It was always the killing blow. He placed the piping hot donut in front of her, and while Joe could tell that she wanted to pretend that she didn't want it, he saw her gulp a mouthful of saliva. She looked up and removed the bangs that covered her face. Joe was able to stare deeply into both of her eyes. They were impossibly light blue-- almost white. They glistened more than most eyes. They were the type of eyes that were used to crying. Joe snapped back into reality at the sound of the bell. Twilight Sparkle was halfway out the door. Joe admitted that he entirely forgot about her.
Joe called out to her, “Aw, you leaving already, Miss Sparkle? Hey, make sure you introduce me to some nice friends next time you come!” Joe’s comment was lost on Twilight. She was already out the door.
“I guess it’s just you and me now, stallion.” said the mare. Her eyes were still fixated on Joe but they were different. They were no longer distant, but studious and inquisitional. She smiled, trying to make it look as cute as possible. Joe had seen that before. She hadn't touched her donut. This mare was looking for companionship, and who was Joe to deny her?
“Feel free to stay as long as you like," he told her. " I’ll keep the place open for you. I’d enjoy the company tonight.” Joe decided to push the gamble and leaned in a little closer. The mare backed away in response. She shifted her body to the side while keeping her eyes on her prize. Joe could see the chess game being played in her head.
“Laying on the charm a bit thick there aren’t you?” She said coldly.
“What? Can’t an old stallion like me be nice to a lonely mare? And I don’t stay open for just anypony you know.”
“Just the pretty fillies who happen to walk in at around closing, right?” She turned her stool around so that her back was facing Joe. He could smell the perfume in her mane. “I’ve dealt with ponies like you before. The kind that like to hover over me at the casinos. And I can tell you that they’re not looking at my cards.” She whipped the stool back around and stared at Joe again with her freezing eyes. “So it’ll take more than a cute grin and a twinkling eye to curry favor with me.”
The mare's head reared back in surprise. The stallion she had been flirting with was no longer the charmer. His frown was melancholic and his mind was lost within a stream of consciousness.
Joe saw the confusion of the mare’s face and quickly picked himself up. “Oh you play poker? I used to be quite the card shark myself, back in the day. I was the best bluffer in Canterlot. I played those other foals like fiddles. Y'know, I was so good that they started calling me ‘The Con Mane.’” Joe's attention was drawn towards the jazz belting jukebox and he realized he had somehow fallen for his own trap. The red mare took her opening and reversed the situation. Now she was the one leaning across the counter-top towards him. Joe took a deep breath and sighed. “Now I just spend my time here making donuts day in and day out...” Joe turned his back to his guest to clean a baking sheet that was already sufficiently clean.
“Oh it can't be all bad.” the mare spoke as if she was talking to an old friend, “There must be some excitement in your life. I’d wager that you’re actually a lot more interesting of a pony then you let on.”
Joe turned back around at her. His charm was back in full swing and he could tell by the mare’s eyes that she was completely invested in their conversation.
“You certainly know how to cheer up an old schmuck,” said Joe with a chuckle. He tried to straighten his mane again. It didn’t work. “Here, have another freebie. Jelly filled.”
“You really know a way to a filly’s heart. Are donuts really the best you can do?”
“It usually does the trick, yes.”
“Well I might as well humor you then.”
“I admire your encouragement, Miss…”
“Velvet. Red Velvet.” Velvet picked up her fresh donut and took a bite. Her gaze never fell off of the proprietor. A little globule of jelly stuck to the side of her mouth. “I admire your determination, Mr….”
“Joe. Donut Joe.” Joe picked up a donut of his own-- sprinkled with pink frosting-- and enjoyed his victory against Miss Red Velvet. The two ponies tapped their baked goods together and enjoyed their late night indulgence. But then the bell rang. It was well past midnight and the shop was usually closed. Velvet and Joe turned around to see who it was.
“Sorry,” Joe began before he could even get a clear look at the pony, “but we’re closing up. But come back tomorrow and I’ll have a fresh batch of donuts hot and ready to eat!”
“I didn't come here for a donut,” said the new pony, “I’m here for Con Mane.”
Joe’s smile faded. He squinted his eyes and furrowed his brow. In front of him was a white Pegasus wearing the signature golden armor of the Equestrian Royal Guard. Joe and the guard glared at each other with burning intensity. Velvet could feel the tension of the room and backed out of their lines of sight.
“Never heard of him.” Joe replied
The guard retained his stalwart posture. “In that case I’ll have a glazed donut, hold the glaze.”
“Hold the glaze?”
“Hold the glaze.”
The air in the room became thick. Velvet stood near the jukebox overcome with a bizarre nervousness. Any hope that she might have had that the jazz would bring her comfort was thwarted by the fiery sparks of the two stallions.
“Oh I see,” said Joe, “Well sorry to tell you but we’re fresh out. I don’t do that kind of thing no more.”
The Royal Guard showed no signs of reaction. “I think you might want to reconsider. This is a special order from Princess Celestia herself.”
Velvet gasped at the sound of the Princess’ name. She darted her eyes between Joe and the Pegasus. Neither one of them showed any signs of backing down from whatever it was they were talking about.
“I should have known.” Joe trotted out from behind the counter, and continued to stare down the royal guard. “I was under the impression that she didn't like my baking no more.”
“She happens to think that you're the best and the only one who can do it.”
“I’m flattered. But the answer is no”
The following silence was crushing. The two stallions were locked in a duel of bravado. The guard pivoted on the spot and faced the entrance-way of the shop.
He flared his large, white wings. "MARE will be expecting you at the normal delivery spot. It would not be wise to keep him waiting, Mr Mane.”
The ringing of the bell punctuated the guard's departure. The intense air was cooled down by the mellow jazz.
“What was all that about?” Velvet asked once she had found her voice.
“Just an old life coming back to haunt me.” Joe still stared out into the pitch black streets outside the donut shop. “But I’ve walked away from all that.”
Red Velvet trotted over to Joe and placed a hoof on his shoulders. Joe tensed his muscles a bit at the unexpected consolation, but he relaxed again as she messaged his neck. His brow, however, remained furrowed.
Red Velvet rubbed Joe's back until his breathing settled. “But by the sound of it, Princess Celestia wants you to bake something for her, right? You can’t turn her down!”
Joe turned and stared into Velvet’s eyes. He saw the her cold damaged pupils once again shimmer with the familiar glaze of tears. He fought the urge to reach out and wipe her eyes, but intead he snorted and tore away from her grasp
“Watch me!” he shouted. Joe stubbornly walked back towards the counter. He distanced himself from everything around him. He scrubbed down the already wiped counter top again with a determined vigor. Velvet walked behind the counter and stopped Joe’s  scrubbing by placing a gentle hoof on his. The sudden touch caught Joe by surprise and he stared into the face of the red mare that was now inches away from his. He saw in her a vulnerability. Her eyes carried a pain that felt all too familiar. In less than an hour Joe had somehow connected with this stranger. Now she was more like an old friend whom he hadn't seen in years.
“Joe.” Velvet said in a friendly whisper, “If you do this, I’ll make sure to come and drop by here more often.”
Velvet leaned in and kissed Joe on the cheek. Joe could feel himself blushing. Velvet's once ice-cold eyes had grown warm, as did her smile. Joe couldn't help but to smile himself.
“You really are a poker player, ain't ya?” he said to her. “Alright, Red. you win. I guess I’d better lock up.”
Red Velvet lifted her head proudly. She quickly whipped around and headed towards the exit. As she meandered towards the door she lifted her tail high into the air as a sign of victory and confidence.
“We’ll have to continue our conversation later, then.” she said playfully, “Oh well.” She slowly turned her head, her hoof lingering on the handle, and gave Joe one final mysterious stare. “Just when things were getting interesting again.”
Joe felt his ears sweat again. “Tomorrow morning than. Maybe we’ll play some poker.”
And with that, Joe's bell rang for the final time that night as the mysterious mare walked out of Double-O Donuts, leaving Joe to close up.