//------------------------------//
// Slaps and Giggles 
// Story: The Chaotic Relationship of Eris and Dusk Shine 
// by 6ix 
//------------------------------//


Dusk felt warmth spread from his heart as he looked at Eris. It has been one crazy trip after another with her around and, good or bad, he was happy to be with her; he was happy at this very moment.
“When we first met you were sniffing me?” Eris asked giving Dusk a funny look. “Pervert.”
And the moment was gone.
“Wait, you are calling me perverted?” Dusk asked as Eris gave him a big toothy smile.
“You’re the one sniffing complete strangers,” she countered.
Dusk’s jaw hung open for a second as he gave her a confounded look. “You make enough dick jokes to make Rainbow Blitz cringe.”
“And he can take a lot of dick.”
“Eris!”
“Boom!” Eris yelled and started laughing at her own joke.
Dusk knew he should be angry, he was angry, but he was happy, too. This was his relationship with her: anger and happiness, irritation and happiness, confusion and happiness, frustration and happiness. No matter what she did to him, he always laughed and ended up happy by the end of it. Even with all his adventures, Dusk was a natural shut-in, preferring isolation and meditation to social interaction. His personality clashed perfectly with Eris’, like a dance, or an elegant duel.
Dusk once wondered if he was just a glutton for punishment; Berry reassured him that he wasn’t ‘that kinky’. He didn’t understand him at the time, but living with Eris tends to expand your understanding of innuendos.
Dusk sighed, knowing to pick and choose his battles. He walked over to the table and pulled out a chair for Eris.
“Come on, gorgeous. I know you’re hungry,” He said as he motioned for her to join him.
“Um…wait, just wait right there.” Eris snapped her claw and was gone. Leaving Dusk alone, at the table, in a candle lit room, and feeling awkward.
“Even when she’s gone things are strange.” Dusk sat down and looked around at the empty room. “And now she has me talking to myself.”
A flash of light coming from the second floor told Dusk she was back; another bright light turned the sliding pole back into stairs
Slowly and uncomfortably, Eris walked down the stairs. Half way down the steps she stopped and looked at Dusk; she grasped the railing tightly as if to keep her there. She stared at her partner trying to read his reaction.
Dusk Shine laid eyes on a sight that not even his mentor has seen: the spirit of chaos blushing.
She wore a black corset style dress with white trimming that belled out at her waist. The corset covered only her stomach so that white puffy fabric covered her chest. The bell gave her more room in the back so that her tail didn’t raise her dress but it hugged her thighs to show the perfect amount of her curves. This explained a lot about this morning to Dusk. Eris must have been planning this for him all weekend. The fact that she worked with Elusive made it even more special. She was so cute. He never considered her the kind to ever wear a dress, but now she has surprised him yet again.
To Dusk, Eris was like a lily in a field of red roses, the white dress at a funeral; how she stood out made her all the more, gorgeous.
Eris resumed her trek down the stairs. At the bottom she stopped again and took an over dramatic pose. “So, how amazing am I?”
Dusk smiled at her. “Isn’t everything you do amazing?”
Eris quickly flew up to Dusk and almost knocked him over as she embraced him. “My Dusky is so smart, that’s why I love you.”
“Aww, you love me,” Dusk said playfully. The sultry smile on Eris dulled and flattened. She let go of Dusk and turned her back on him in a huff; the dress twirled with her body, lifting up slightly. Dusk’s heart skipped a beat at the sight.
“Never mind,” she said dismissively.
Dusk never went a day without saying the ‘L’ word; Eris however had to be inebriated or exhausted to even mutter it.
“Nope, you can’t take it back,” Dusk retorted.
“Well you can’t prove I said it.” Eris looked back at Dusk and stuck her tongue out at him.
Dusk smirked. “Yes I can.”
He light up his horn and a watery image of her saying it as she hugged him flowed out of his horn into the air.
“See,” Eris sighed. “Now I have to kill you.”
“Let’s eat first.” Dusk said. “Then you can kill me.”
“Fine.” She said dismissively.
All through the meal Dusk kept eyeballing Eris in her outfit. He loved the dress. He had to refocus on his meal from time to time or else suffer an embarrassment that only males had to deal with. His body was not easily distracted as every time he looked away Eris would run the fluff her tail up his leg making him drop his silverware more than a few times. He would glare and she would act innocent every time. So Dusk tried ignoring her. His plan backfired as she her tail found its way between his legs making him cough on some bread. Instead of helping as he choked, Eris just laughed and pointed.
“I’m so happy my discomfort entertains you,” Dusk said after he got his breath back.
“It does,” She responded with a smile. “In fact you’ve entertained me so much that I have decided not to kill you.”
“Well, that’s a relief,” Dusk said sarcastically.
“Speaking of relief...” Dusk found his marefriend’s tail between his legs again. His body jerked out of surprise. “You squirm like a little filly,” She teased.
Dusk narrowed his eyes at her; he grabbed her tail out from between his legs and yanked. He pulled her right out of her chair.
“Eep!” Eris squeaked as Dusk dragged her under the table to him. He looked down, ready to get her back, but he froze and turned red.
Her dress had bunched up to the corset section; exposing her lower half to him. Eris hardly ever wore clothes, so the lack of clothes was nothing new. The black panties with a white bow at the waistline were. His gaze climbed up her body to her face. For only the second time in his life he could see scarlet fill her cheeks. Her wide eyes and soft expression reflected that Eris was genuinely surprised by Dusk and his action. He had never seen such an innocent look to his girls as she lied there on the floor. The entire view of Eris sprawled out underneath him with that look and those clothes made time stand still for Dusk.
“My stallion has grown bold.” Eris’ voice was hardly above a whisper. She meant to tease him, but the sincerity in her words slipped through.
Her soft voice drew his gaze to her eyes. He had never seen her in this light. Their intimacy has always been of a playful sort. You’d be surprised how easily a game of hide and seek turns into a frolic in a haystack.
Dusk was still hovering above her on the edge of his chair; his eyes fixed on her expression. They slid down her body becoming transfixed on the undergarments, his heart hammering its way out of his chest.
You never fail to surprise me, Eris,Dusk thought to himself.
The break from his gaze snapped Eris out of her own transfixion. She’d never admit it, but she was embarrassed and very self-conscious about what she had on. After she turned a new leaf and obtained her very first friend, she had to learn a lot about relationships, even more so after she decided to make Dusk her mate, her first mate. These two years she discovered so many new things about herself that she never knew existed. Now, with her stallion staring at her like he was, she felt exposed for the first time in her long life. This new sensation made her discover another new feeling. Dusk made her feel safe. Here she was exposed in a way that she had never been before, but because it was Dusk Shine she was happy about it. Then she felt a little disappointed; the panties were supposed to be a surprise for him later on, but she decided to roll with it like she always did.
She looked down at herself, following Dusk’s gaze.
“Well cats out of the bag…or should I say out of the dress.” Her ears and eyes perked up. “Hey!” she clicked her tongue. “I just made a pussy joke!”
Dusk faced hoofed.
“Why do you ruin perfectly good moments, like this, with that mouth of yours?” Dusk groaned in annoyance.
“Oh come on, Dusky.” As Eris spoke in a playful manner, she got up and climbed onto Dusk’s chair. She forced him to sit back as she straddled him. She took his face in her claws and forced him to look up at her. “You know I’ve started just as many moments like this with my mouth.” With a smirk, she slowly kissed him.
“You still hungry?” Eris asked after she pulled away from his lips. She then ran her tongue up the edge of his ear. “Because I have something you can eat.” She whispered to him before she bit him. She could feel Dusk ear heat up as she nibbled on it.
Eris flapped her wings and floated backwards looking down at a red faced Dusk Shine.
“Two years and I still can make you blush like a little school colt,” Eris teased in and endearing voice.
Like a fish in water Eris did a loop in the air and flew up to Dusk, pressing her muzzle against his.
“Eris.” Dusk nearly fell off the chair trying to get away from her. “Don’t-”
Eris licked his entire face. Saliva dripped from his fur, his mane was sticking straight up, and he had a grimace on his face.
“Really, Eris, really?” Dusk berated as he wipe his face with one of the napkins on the table. “You know I hate it when you do that.”
“I knooow.” Eris tilted her head and smiled. “Why do you think I keep on doing it?”
Eris climbed off of Dusk and walk towards the stairs, her tail swinging enticingly. “Come my little Dusky, you may tuck me in now.”
“It’s the middle of the day!” Dusk exclaimed as she made her way up the stairs. “How are you tired?”
“Never said I was going to sleep.” Eris clarified as she disappeared into their bedroom.
“Ummmm…” Dusk stared at the table and considered cleaning up. “Yea.”
The stallion pushed everything else out of his mind as he bolted upstairs.


	
“Dusk! You’re back!” Spines ran through the door of the library to her long time friend and squeezed him.
“Whoa! It’s great to see you too but what put you in such a hugging mood?” he asked as he returned the pleasant embrace.
“It rhymes with sick, lick, flick, and brick!” Eris yelled out from upstairs.
Dusk looked up at the second floor with a confused look in his eyes, but he shrugged it off. He learned a long time ago that with Eris it’s sometime…most of the time actually, better not to know.
“Is Eris in bed?” Spines ask in a confused voice.
Dust started to walk toward the book shelves. “Yea she’s kind of worn out right now,” Dusk answered without thinking about it.
“From what?”  Spines asked with a frown on her face.
Dust froze mid-step and cringed, cursing himself for walking into that. “Er..she…its..just been a long day. Could you, um, help me with the books I have been away for several days?”
“Sure thing!” Chirped Spines, happy to fill her role as Dusk’s assistant.
Dusk made it to wall of books and started putting a couple of them in the right categories, a practice that had become more frequent since Eris moved in. As he worked, Dusk made a mental noted to scold Eris for trying to sneak porn into the children’s section, and the cooking section, and the biography section, pretty much every section he went through. Dusk rolled his eyes when he found that she put a whole bunch of books on caves and towers in the adult section. One of them was an old book titled Large Erection of Ancient History.
“I honestly don’t blame her for that one,” Dusk said to himself as he placed the book back into the history section.
“I know, right!” Dusk heard Eris yell from upstairs...again. “It was almost too easy.”
“How is she doing that?” Dusk asked to no one in particular.
“You know better than to ask that.” Spines joked as she started to help Dusk reorder the books. “Oh, here is another one.” Spines said as she pulled a cookbook out of the adult section.
“’Stuffing your Clams with Cucumbers’” Dusk read out loud making Spines giggle a little bit. Dusk, however, just sighed. “I have actually used this book a few times. Now I can’t ever look at it the same way.”
“Read page 69!” Eris yelled out.
“How is she doing that?” Spines asked as Dusk opened the book and read out loud.
“Spreading mayonnaise over your flow-“ Dusk slammed the book closed put it back on the wall.
Spines was doing her best to stifle her laughter, wanting to appear mature. Another out of place book caught her eye. She reached out pulled it just enough to see the title, but she accidently pulled out the graphic novel in front of it as well. Her eyes widen a little as she read the titles.
“Hey, Dusk, check out this one.” She said as she elbowed her lifelong friend.
Dusk followed Spines direction and found a self help book behind a popular comic book. He read the titles and sighed.
BatStallion: Origins
Dealing with Your Parents’ Death
“Really, Eris? Really?” Dusk said out loud.
“At least it’s not another dick joke!” the spirit yelled out from upstairs…for the fourth time.
Dusk smacked his face with his hoof. “Did she leave her ear down here or something?”
“Ew,” Spines said with a grimace. “I hate it when she does that. I asked her to help me clean up the kitchen while you were gone. She was too lazy to get up so she just sent her claws in. Scared the scales right off my tail.”
“I can hear you two ya know. Why are you guys yelling anyways?” Eris came the top of the stairs and looked down at the two.
“We’re not yelling,” Spines responded.
“What?!” Eris yelled as if she was speaking over loud music. “Why are you whispering? Is this some kind of lame joke? If it is I taught you better than this, Dusk.”
Spines and Dusk looked at each other for a moment before turning back just in time to see the spirit vanish. They heard rummaging coming from the kitchen. The two silently agreed to investigate. They found Eris ducked into the fridge pulling out half of its content all rolled up in a ball. She looked like she was about to fall over.
“Eris? What are you doing?” Dusk asked in a concerned voice.
Eris responded with a deep, eccentric, voice. “What bitches are supposed to do in a kitchen! Make sandwiches!”
Dusk groaned “Really, Eris, the pimp routine? It wasn’t funny the first time.”
Eris ignored him and placed all the food on the counter. She went to the food cabinet and found it devoid of bread.
“No bread!” Eris pointed her claw at Dusk “You! Get to da sto’ and buy me bread!”
“Can't you just conjure some bread?” Dusk moaned.
Eris threw her claws in the air as if her colt just insulted her. “Oh helllll naw! Where my baby powder, bitch needs to be slapped!”
Before Dusk could respond the draconequus ran past him and Spines in the direction of the bathroom.
Spines and Dusk gave each other a concerned look. Eris did act up a lot but her mannerisms were never this sporadic.
They followed her and stood outside the bathroom. They could hear Eris heave into the toilet and flush before she open the door slowly. Her face was pale and her movements were sluggish.
“I thought I had to pee.” She said to the onlookers. “I was wrong.”
“You should brush your teeth, dear,” Dusk said in a concerned voice. “Spines, do we have any soda water?”
As Spines ran back to the kitchen Eris gradually trudges back into lavatory. “I still need to pee.” She whined.
Dusk made his way to the kitchen to see if they had any ginger that would help her feel better. Just as he placed his hoof on the door he could hear a faint repetition.
“Doozy, doozy,  doozy, doozy, doozy, doozy, doozy,”
“Not now.” Dusk groaned. He positioned himself parallel to the tree house entrance. The stallion lit up his horn and opened the front door. He pulled every cushion and fixture within range of his magic to him. He piled everything in front of him like shield and braced himself.
“Doozy, doozy, doozy, doozy, doozy, doozy, doozy!”
A pink blur shot through the door and collided with the mountain of fluff sending an explosion of feathers in all directions.
“Dusk!” Berry cried out as he pulled his friends deadpan face to his. “I felt a doozy and it’s a doozy of a doozy.”
Dusk pulled the pink stallion’s hooves off of him to give him room to move his jaw. “Thanks for the heads up, but does your Berry sense have anything to say about what this doozy is about?”
“That’s not how it works, silly,” Berry said through a laugh.
Dusk could only roll his eyes. “Well since you’re here would you like to hang out? Eris is-“
Like a stone in his belly, Desk felt the twinge of panic when the sound of a body falling came from the bathroom.
Him and Berry ran to the door and flung it open. The color drained from Dusks coat as he saw the unconscious body of Eris on the floor.


	
In a white room with the most mundane décor lied the most unusual patient the Ponyville Memorial has ever seen. Machines attached to the spirit beeped and hummed all around her.
Next to the bed Dusk fought the urge to climb into the sheets and hold on to her as tight as he could muscle. Despite being there for only a few hours the purple stallion looked like he had been awake for days. His ears perked up to the sound of hooves approaching the door. With a squeak it opened to Spines leading a group of stallions into the room.
“Hey, Dusk,” Spines said solemnly, but her tone cheered up quickly. “Found some ponies that would like to be here when our favorite mare, I mean, spirit, wakes up.”
“Sup D!” Blitz chirped as he walked past Spines straight to Dusk’s side.
“Hello, Dusk Shine,” Elusive said.
“How is she doing?” Butterscotch asked as he flew over and hovered above Eris’ still sleeping body.
“Hello everypony. The doctor just got done with the last test, he said it may be nothing but it’s important to check.” He looked down at her claw and put his hoof on it. “She hasn’t even moved.”
Berry’s pink tail backed up into the room as he dragged in a white cannon with a red cross on the barrel.
“I usually fill my get well party cannon with streamers, balloons, and medicine that goes into the leg.” He imitated somepony giving him a shot in the leg. “But I could only find the needles on such a short notice.” As he spoke he started to aim his favorite party tool right at Eris.  
“I think it’s best to let her rest.” Elusive said rather quickly.
“Howdy, ya’ll.” The deep twang of Applejack announced his arrival. “Sorry ah couldn’t get away from the farm any sooner.”
“AJ!” Spines chirped before she ran up to the large stallion.
“Heya, sunflower,” AJ responded. “How is she?”
“She is awake,” Eris said turning all the heads towards her. “And apparently very popular with the stallions.” She added as she looked around the room; Dusk letting out a sigh of relief. “Too bad none of you are my type.”
“What about me?” Dusk asked knowing full well it was a set up.
“Eh.” Eris shrugged. “I tolerate you.”
Despite the joke, everypony was smiling at Eris and her apparent recovery.
“Sooo.” Eris spoke as she stretched her arms out. “Besides insanity and my taste in stallions, what’s wrong with me?”
“You simply didn’t have enough iron in your blood.” The resident doctor said as he walked in. “I assumed it was as much but assumptions are dangerous in my line of work. You just need to eat more leafy greens; some more milk is also suggestible.” He pulled out Eris’ chart from the front of her bed and glanced at it. “Omnivore, hmm, fish or any white meat if you can find it.”
“So it was her diet?” Butter Scotch asked.
“No, her diet is fine she just a little anemic, normal for her condition.”
“Condition?” Dusk asked as he tilted his head.
The doctor turned a page over on the chart then looked up at Eris. “You are with foal, correct?”
Everypony in the room just froze with their jaws on the ground.
“Oooooooohhhh,” said Berry breaking the silence. “So that’s the doozy!”

To his girls?