//------------------------------// // Thoughts of an Angel // Story: Thoughts of an Angel // by TP Night //------------------------------// "Angel Bunny! Your dinner is ready!" I heard her voice call out through the half-open door to the cottage where we live. Her name is Fluttershy, she's a pony. One of those 'pegasus', winged ponies. She takes care of me, I'm her pet.. I jumped out from my hiding spot, inside a bush at the cottage wall, close to the door. "There you are." She said when she saw me. She smiled and motioned for me to get inside. When I got inside, I found a bowl of freshly cut vegetables. This made no sense to me. Today, Strawberry season begun, which SHOULD mean she would give me strawberries, not salad. I looked at her with an annoyed expression on my face, pointing at the salad and stomping my foot rapidly. I could see her eyes turn sad for a second, but she put on a smile again and simply said, "I'm.. sorry Angel, but I didn't find any strawberries.. I had so many other errands to run. When I finally got to the market stall they had closed already. I'll get you some tomorrow, I promise." I kept staring for a few moments, and then started eating my salad. It was actually quite good. Every piece perfectly cut. At the bottom, a layer of lettuce. On that, a layer of sliced cucumber, and all topped off with half a tomato. After I finished my salad, I ran back to the door and waited for her to open it for me. I am just a rabbit, so that door is too heavy for me, but she said we would make a smaller door for me inside the regular door, so I could come and go without her help. I'd like that... She didn't come to open the door for me. Instead she remained in the kitchen, and she spoke again. "Don't you want any dessert, Angel?" When I heard 'dessert' my ears perked up, and my eyes widened. We didn't usually have dessert unless it was some special day. And today was no special day.. unless.. I started sniffing, my nose moving quickly as I drew breath through it. My eyes widened even further when I noticed a distinct smell coming from the kitchen. Could it be...? She took out a bowl from a cabinet and put it on the table, and motioned for me to come. "Come here." She said. "I have a surprise for you, and I think you can guess what it is." She smiled at me. I quickly jumped back and up to the stool next to the table, and my eyes was met by a full bowl of strawberries. They were all cut in perfect halves. Big, juicy, bright red strawberries. And they were all mine! Fluttershy was allergic to them. She could touch them, but her stomach couldn't handle it if she ate them, so she always got them for me during the seasons. But she had said she didn't. Clever ploy to make me eat my other vegetables before the strawberries, I must admit. I finished them quickly, I couldn't stop myself... In a matter of just five minutes I had emptied the bowl as if I was a wild beast feasting on prey. Which is also what I looked like afterwards. All the red juices stuck to my fur around the mouth and on my paws, making them look bloodied. I jumped over to the cabinet where we stored the towels, and got one out to clean myself. And then she finally opened the door for me. When I got out, I started running around the cottage, lap after lap. This is something I sometimes do. I like the exercise, and being a rabbit means lots of energy that needs to go somewhere, or else I feel restless. I do enjoy relaxing too though, just not all the time. I went down to the river near the cottage, and sat down for a moment to rest under the bridge, watching as a few small fishes struggled with the stream trying to swim against it. They made progress, but very slowly. I ran a few more laps around the cottage, then looked up towards the sky. The sun was still high above me, so it would be a few more hours until nightfall. I went back in to the bush. This was my own, private spot. I hollowed it out last year, turning it into a 'cave' of leaves and branches, a cave where I could be alone with my thoughts... * * * * "Oh, Fluttershy.. How I wish I could speak.. But such a thing would not be possible, not even with your friends help. How I long to tell you, actually TELL you how much I really do appreciate all that you do and all that you've done for me... All the food you've made me, all the times you 'fluffed' my tail, all the times I hurt myself or got sick and you nursed me back to health.. Not even once did we ever need another pony to help. It was always you, alone, who nursed me.. Ever since I was barely more than a baby, you've been there for me even when I misbehave. You always forgive me, no matter what I do. I am truly sorry for the way I sometimes behave, but it's because I want to make you stronger. I know how fragile you are, and I'm trying to make you realize you can't always be like that. I am trying to push you to a point where you finally understand that you have to say 'no' sometimes. I act out like this because I want to teach you to be stronger. If we could talk, I could tell you all of this.. But there is no way. Such a spell would at best be temporary, and such a gift is too great to only give for a day. If we got the chance, for just a day.. We would talk all day long, never fall silent even for a second. But then.. When the time runs out, I would no longer be able to answer you. Maybe, just maybe, You could handle that.. though fragile, you are stronger than you seem. And me, I am the opposite... I act strong, I pretend to be a bully, to hide the fact that I am the opposite of all that. . I could not live with the knowledge that I had a chance to tell you everything. There could never be enough time for me to tell you everything I want to tell you. And then, I would forever regret all the things I COULD have told you.. It's easier this way, if I can never say ANY of it.. It has to be ALL... or nothing. No in-betweens. Oh, I truly wish I could make you understand how much you really mean to me, even if I rarely show it to you. But I must keep up the facade for now.. maybe forever.. even though it hurts me now, it could hurt you more later if I did not. What I can do is make a silent promise, one that you will never hear me say, but one that I will keep at any cost.. I promise.. That whatever happens to either of us.. As long as we both live, I will be by your side, or close to it, at all times.. I will never be far from you.. And if I can, I will protect you from anything or anypony that tries to harm you. And if I can't, I will still try as hard as I can, even at the cost of my own health.. Or if bad comes to worst.. my very life. To me, You are worth more than myself, because you have given me so much even though I sometimes did not deserve it, even though I often acted in a manner you did not appreciate, you never scolded me for it, you always accepted me as I am.. or rather, as you THINK I am, though it's my shield for both of us. I may be an angel by name, but you are an angel by nature. For you... if it would save you.. I would give my life. * * * * A couple of hours went by, and the sun started to slowly move down beyond the horizon. Soon after, the moon rose slowly to take the suns place. I could hear Fluttershy walk out the door and take a few steps around the garden. I could hear her voice again. "Angel Bunny? Where did you go this time? It's getting late, it's time to go to bed soon. You better come inside." Just like last time, I jumped out from the bush. It must have felt like déjà vu to her. I saw her smile. It was getting a bit chilly even though it was summer, and I shrugged a little as I jumped inside. She must have noticed, because as I got in, she asked, "Do you want me to make us some hot chocolate, Angel? You seem cold.." I nodded and smiled. While she made the chocolate, I jumped up on my stool next to the table. She sat down on a chair on the opposite side after she handed me my chocolate. We both sat silently, drinking in peace... "Well... All things considered, this is not so bad.. If we can just have it like this, I will be happy.. and I can see in her eyes that she is too.. If we can just stay like this, everything will be okay. We don't need words.." "Do you want me to sing you a lullaby? Or maybe tell you a good-night story?" She asked me in a warm, almost motherly voice. "Scratch that. We need words. I need her words..." The End