The girls retreated from Carousel Boutique and piled back into the library.
“So …” Twilight said, closing the door. She walked over to her friends. “Rarity’s getting married. How … how do we want to react to this?” Twilight scanned over her friends, noticing an outlier - Cherry Jubilee.
“Cherry?” Twilight asked. “I’m so sorry, but … could I ask you to sit this one out? We’ve known Rarity for longer than you, and she’s been our friend for all that time …”
“Of course.” Cherry nodded and went on her way towards the door.
“Again, I’m sorry …”
“There’s no need to apologize, Princess!” Cherry assured Twilight while opening the door. “I understand completely.”
“Thanks …”
Cherry closed the door.
“What do we do?” Rainbow Dash asked, flying into the air. “Rarity can’t get married!” She placed her hooves on her cheeks. “I have a fear of commitment!”
“Really?” Twilight raised a brow and chuckled. “You, Rainbow Dash, the Element of Loyalty, have a fear of commitment?” Twilight blinked. “Wait a second, why are you having a fear of commitment? You’re not even the one getting married!”
“I have a phobia, okay?”
Twilight rolled her eyes. “Anypony else?”
“Ooh! Ooh!” Pinkie Pie jumped up and down. “Rarity can’t get married!”
“Why not?”
“I haven’t even finished the wedding cake!” Pinkie Pie said. “I need at least two days’ notice before I can make a really great wedding cake like my best friends’ deserve! I need to double- to compensate for the time deficiency!”
“Pinkie, I don’t think Rarity is going hold the ceremony a day after …” Twilight’s voice trailed off as Pinkie zoomed past her out the door, Twilight catching a brief glimpse of a confused Cherry as the door swung back and forth, squeaking before it closed, “proposing.”
“Twilight?” Applejack raised her hoof. “You’ll asked how we wanted to react this, right? Well, I’ve been thinking, and I think we need to act surprised. Rarity doesn’t know we know, and she’ll get upset if she finds out we spied on her during what was supposed to be an intimate moment.” Applejack glanced at the carpet. “She’d have every right to be, but still.”
“You’re right, Applejack. She’ll probably want to make a big deal of revealing it, too. Maybe invite us all over for a party or something …”
“Like when she first announced she was dating Hayseed,” Applejack said with an amused smile.
“Yeah. Or maybe come to us, clear her throat, and not-so-subtly insist we ask her what Hayseed did.” Dash cleared her throat. “‘Oooh, darrrlings! Aren’t you ever so curious about what Hayseed for for me last night’?”
Twilight, Applejack, and Fluttershy laughed.
“I won’t lie, that’s a pretty good impression of Rarity, R.D.” Applejack said.
“Yeah. I’ve been practicing.”
“Why would you be practicing something like that, Rainbow Dash?” Twilight asked.
Dash shrugged. “Hey, you never know when we’ll get into one of our crazy antics again, and having someone around to mimic Rarity when she’s not available will come in handy.”
“Given the kind of things that happen around Ponyville, I wouldn’t put it out of the question,” Twilight said. “Remember the Parasprites? Ugh.” Everypony in the room gave an involuntary shiver. “Anyway, I think that about covers it for. Go home, everypony. Go to bed, get some rest. We’re going to have more than a few big days ahead of us for the next few days. And remember, we can’t let Rarity know we already know about the proposal!”
“Got it.” Dash saluted before flying out the window.
“I think we’ve made that clear,” Applejack said, walking out the door. “I’ll go explain to Cherry.”
“Don’t worry, Twilight.” Fluttershy said as she passed Twilight on her way out. “You can count on us.”
Twilight put a hoof on the doorknob and smiled. “I know I can, girls.” She closed the door. “Alright, Spike. Come on and let’s go to bed.”
“Aw, what are you talking about?” Spike shrugged. He let out a yawn. “I’m … barely sleepy.”
Twilight glared at him.
“Oh, fine. I guess maybe… a little rest couldn’t hurt.”
“Come on, Rip Van Winkle.” Twilight walked up to him and used her magic to lift him and place him on her back, taking him with her as she climbed up the stairs to their bedroom.
Well, the moment happened. The one they were waiting for and expecting had arrived. Rarity had sent out cards telling them she wanted them to come over so she could make a “big,” which was crossed over with several adjectives, ranging from "Gigantic," "Splendorous," Mountainous," "Fantastic," "Glorious," and "Spectacular" before finally concluding with "Monumental" announcement.
Twilight and her friends went to the Carousel Boutique, gathering up outside the door. They chuckled nervously before going inside, finding Rarity and Hayseed sitting on at the kitchen table, holding hooves together.
"Hey, Rarity..." Twilight said. "You... had something you wanted to tell us?"
"Indeed I do, darlings," Rarity said, taking Hayseed by the hoof and guiding him with her as she moved towards them. "Hayseed, darling, would you like to tell them about us?"
"Well, I-"
Rarity stuffed her hoof into his mouth. "Oh, no, better idea, we'll do it together." She removed her hoof. "Ready? On three. One, two, three!"
"WE'RE GETTING MARRIED!" They shouted in unison.
"Ah, gee, Rarity. I'm... so happy... for you." Applejack said.
Twilight bumped her in the shoulder. "Act. Surprised." Twilight insisted through gritted teeth before turning to Rarity and smiling. "So, have you chosen a venue?"
"We were discussing perhaps outside the Apple Farm." Hayseed said. "You know, what with me being a farm pony and all, heh heh."
Rarity did not seem too enthused by the idea. "Yes, well. I had been considering at the Boutique, but then it occurred to me there might not be room for all of the guests. Then my next thought was in Canterlot, but then I thought, nooo! Surely Princess Celestia has more important things to be doing with her time than holding my wedding ceremony at her castle! And besides, the last time somepony had a wedding there, it turned out to be this whole big debacle, didn't it?"
Twilight and her friends chuckled.
"It certainly did," Twilight said. She gave a bitter glare at her friends. "For some of us more than others." Her friends blushed and backed away.
"You know, I'm starting to suspect there might be a curse or a jinx on that place. I recall reading a legend about another couple who also got married in Canterlot, but tragedy befell them, and they fell off the mountain to their doooooms!" Rarity waved her leg over her head.
Applejack raised an eyebrow. "But how... ?"
"Neither of them could fly or use magic. Anyway, after much thinking, I've determined I do want to have a wedding outdoors, with nature all around us, the sunlight shining, flowers swaying in the breeze! Just ... perhaps not next to Applejack's farm, with all her smelly pigs."
Applejack looked ready to defend herself, but she relented. "Yeah, okay. Those pigs do start to stink up the place pretty bad, even right after we hose 'em down."
"Well, we're very happy for you, Rarity, and we hope you and Hayseed find happiness and wonder in your new life." Fluttershy said.
"Are you gonna make your own wedding dress?" Twilight asked.
"Ooh!" Rarity squealed in excitement, putting her hooves together with stars in her eyes. "I hadn't thought of that! We're not quite there yet in our planning, but that's a brilliant idea, darling! I'll go get started on it right away!" Rarity turned and ran into her work room, giggling with glee like a madmare. A gleemadmare, perhaps.
Hayseed bore a nervous grin at his fiance's eccentricities. He turned towards Twilight and company. They waved at him before awkwardly, nervously backing out the door, moving as one as they departed from the building, walking carefully on their hind hooves so as not to trip over each other.
“Mister and Missus Caaake!” Pinkie Pie shouted, running into Sugarcube Corner. “Do you remember that big wedding cake I told you we needed to get started on right away when I came home last night?”
“Yes, dear!” Missus Cake shouted, stirring a bowl of various baking ingredients together.
“Don’t worry, Pinkie Pie, we’re still on it.’ Mister Cake assured her.
“Oh. Okay! You want some help with that?” Pinkie Pie walked over to inspect their progress. “Seems like you’re doing fine to me!” She walked off, leaving Mister Cake grimacing at his work load.
Rainbow Dash made a motion which could charitably be called ‘sitting’ at Fluttershy’s cottage, shakily holding a cup and saucer of tea in her hooves.
“Rarity can’t get married,” Dash said. “Like, Fluttershy, I know I’ve never talked to you about this before, but I have this really bad fear of commitment! It’s a phobia, I tell you! A phobia!”
“Rainbow Dash,” Fluttershy said in her kindest, gentlest tone, “I don’t think you have a fear of commitment at all. I think you’re mistaking what your feeling as a phobia and rationalizing it that way. You’re not afraid of commitment, you’re just anxious because one of your best friends is about to go through a very big change in their life, and you’re afraid of that change. Change can be scary, after all… but it can be good, too.”
“No, no,” Dash shook her head. “I’m pretty sure it’s a fear of commitment. Like, borderline mental disorder.”
Fluttershy tensed her shoulders, groaning in frustration. She took in a deep breath to calm herself. “Rainbow Dash, you’re being ridiculous. (But maybe you might be onto something with that disorder idea) ... “
“What am I gonna do?” Rainbow Dash shrieked, grasping at her face, dropping her silverware and letting it shatter on the ground, furthering Fluttershy’s annoyance.
“Rainbow Dash, you’re not afraid of commitment! You make commitments all the time! To me, to Applejack, to Twilight, to your job as a weatherpony, to the Wonderbolts, and putting on a performance at all those big events we go to!”
Rainbow Dash gasped. “Oh my gosh, Fluttershy, you’re right! I’m … I’m going to have to retire early! I’m going to have to give up on becoming a Wonderbolt!”
Fluttershy growled, baring her teeth. Her pet rabbit hopped up to the side of her chair.
“Oh, Angel Bunny.” Fluttershy said, smiling at the sight of him. She reached down and pet his head, before lifting one ear up and whispering to him. “Get. The. Hammer.” Angel seemed shocked, but he developed an evil grin and saluted before hopping away. “This calls for a little percussive therapy… it’s not my favorite technique to use, but this situation demands special treatment.”
Applejack opened the door to her house and went inside, passing Big Macintosh.
“Howdy,” Big Mac greeted her.
“Howdy.” Applejack waved back to him. “Oh, um, hey, Rarity’s getting married. To that Hayseed feller?” She spoke about it as if as an afterthought.
“Ooh.” Big Macintosh developed an interest, lifting his brows. “I know somepony who could do with discussing about that, eh?” Big Macintosh playfully slapped Applejack on the shoulder, her eyes widening as she realized what she meant. “Hint, hint.”
“Now you go and stop that right there, mister!” Applejack rounded on him, slapping his hoof away. “Y’all put that idea straight out of that thick head of yours, ‘cause Cherry and I already talked about this, and I told her - and I meant - that we didn’t have to think about it right now, ya hear?”
Big Macintosh reeled back. He hung his head and sighed. “I’m sorry, A.J.”
“It’s alright, big brother. I forgive ya. But consarn it, why are y’all suddenly so darn obsessed on getting me hooked up? Aren’t you the one who’s always taking it slow through life?”
Big Macintosh nodded. “I know. I am. I’m sorry, again, Applejack. It’s just … after watchin’ you waste away by the window you way you did while you were pinin’ after Twilight Sparkle … I don’t want you to see you go through that again, so I just … want to be sure you make this opportunity last and don’t end up like that again.”
“Don’t worry.” Applejack assured him. “I will. I recognize I got a good thing going here with Cherry Jubilee. I am not throwing it away.”
“Glad to hear it. C'mere.”
Applejack pursed her lips, but obliged to Big Macintosh’s request. He took his hoof out and scooped her up into a big, bone-crushing hug.
“Okay, okay, that’s enough. I can hardly breath over here.” Applejack pushed herself away, her hooves resting on Big Macintosh’s chest. The two of them shared a laugh.
"Hey." Twilight said, walking down the stairs, where Spike was sitting on the bottom step with his head slumped in his hands.
"So... do you want to go to the wedding?"
"I'm not sure." Spike answered. "I mean, I don't know how I should feel about it. Before Hayseed proposed, I talked to him. You know that, we were hanging out together... anyway... I tried to talk Hayseed out of going through with it and proposing."
Twilight pursed her lips and raised a brow.
"I know what you're thinking, but it wasn't like that." Spike said. "I just... I don't know. I'm... upset, I guess."
"About what?"
"I'm upset Hayseed's ignoring my advice. I feel like he's ignoring me." Spike gestured to himself. "I'm worried it out won't work for them."
"Worrying or hoping?"
"Worrying!" Spike answered back without the slightest of hesitation. "I want this to work out for them! I want them to be happy! Because if they're happy, I can go look elsewhere for my own sources of happiness and not have to wonder, 'what if'?"
Spike sighed and brought his head back down into his hands.
"I know how you feel, Spike." Twilight hooked her leg around his neck and pulled him into her chest. "It's a big change, and ... it can be kind of scary."
"It'll be okay, though. It'll all work out in the end..." Spike pulled his face out.. "Right?"
"I don't know, Spike. Despite you know, how smart I am and being a Princess, I really don't have all the answers. I hope so..."
Celestia stood outside a balcony on Canterlot, looking up to the sky as her sun shone its warming light all over the horizon, to Equestria and all the lands within.
Her attention was torn away from admiring the beauty and majesty by the sound and distinctive flash of a teleport spell coming from inside the building.
Discord stepped out, coming onto the balcony with her.
“My dear Princess Celestia…” Discord bowed. He got one knee and pulled out a bouquet of roses from behind his back. “Please accept this as a token of my humble apology for any and all transgressions, past, present, and future.”
Celestia sneered at him. “One last pathetic grab for my affections it is, then, Discord?”
“I’m… afraid so, yes.” Discord wilted.
A bee startled Celestia when it flew out from a rose, buzzing and twittering around angrily as it flew around in circles. Celestia grabbed it with her magic and tilted her head, flicking the bee over the edge of the balcony where it could pollinate in the royal gardens in peace.
“I am going to be generous and assume the bee was not intentional.”
“It wasn’t.” Discord was quick to claim, rubbing the back of his head.
“Discord ... “ Celestia cupped a rose with her hoof, bouncing its petals and taking a sniff of its aroma. “I won’t deny that we had something special once.” Celestia pushed the bouquet away. “But that was in the past. It’s over now, and you must accept that. It won't work, it didn’t work then, and it wouldn’t work any differently now. Just look at what happened in the restaurant. It’s over. It’s done, and you need to move on.”
Discord sighed. He stood up and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I suppose … somewhere deep down, I know all of that already.” Discord reached up and popped the horn off his head. He twisted the horn into the shape of a heart and held it up to his chest. “But I just can’t let you go. I don’t want to let go.”
“You have to. For all our sakes.”
“Hmph. If you had no intention of ever starting your relationship back up with me, then why did you have Twilight Sparkle and her friends free from my stone prison in the first place?”
“I won’t deny that… did affect my decision making.” Celestia said. “But I still thought you could be useful, and thus far, you haven’t proved me wrong yet. But any romantic relationship between us is over… and it’s never coming back. Besides, I’m with Spike now.”
Discord pulled on the sides of the horn, breaking the heart in two. He dropped the broken heart to the ground.
“Spike won’t be able to make you happy forever, you know. He doesn’t know you like I do. How do you think he’ll react to seeing the real you, warts and all?”
“Perhaps he won’t. Perhaps he doesn’t. Perhaps he’ll have a panic attack at the realization I’m not always the moral pillar of righteousness and goodness I’m made out to be, that at my worst… I am still just a pony. Or perhaps he’ll accept me for who I really am. Although… ” A seed of doubt was planted in Celestia’s mind. “He is still quite young.”
“Ah, you see?” Discord said. “He’s too young for you. He’ll grow old and wither away before you know it. It’ll never work, you should break it up right this instant. I’ll write the letter for you!” Discord conjured a quill and paper. “To my dearest Spike… yes, that’s a good start.”
Celestia glared at him and grunted.
Discord took the hint, dismissing the quill and paper into emerald fire.
Celestia turned her head aside and pulled out a letter with magic. “Rarity will be having a wedding in a few days. I want you to be on your best behavior during this time. Don’t cause any trouble.”
“Moi? Cause trouble?” Discord feigned offense, rearing his body back and placing a hand on his chest. “Why, I never cause trouble! I am the epitome of good behavior!” He reached up and twisted his remaining antler into the shape of a halo.
Celestia rolled her eyes and walked past him, leaving the balcony.
Celestia walked through the castle, surly and dragging her hooves after her talk with Discord.
Luna popped her head through a doorway. “Ah, sister!” Luna walked up to her. “There you are.”
“Hello, Luna.” Celestia’s mood improved at the sight of her sister, reminded of happier times and forgetting about Discord. “What do you need?”
There’s been some word going around that Rarity, Twilight Sparkle’s friend, is getting married soon. Is this true?”
“Yes, that’s correct. Why do you ask?”
“I want to officiate.”
Celestia paused. “I’m sorry, come again?”
“You got to officiate last time there was a big wedding at Shining Armor and Cadence’s ceremony!” Luna pointed accusingly at Celestia and gestured to herself. “I want a turn! I want to be the one to officiate at Rarity’s wedding to… Hayseed, was it?”
Celestia nodded slowly, puzzled by Luna’s odd and unusual desire which seem to have sprang from thin air, although she didn’t see anything objectively wrong with it.
“O… kay. I will… write a letter to Twilight to ask if Rarity would be comfortable with that.”
“Huzzah! Thank you, sister.” Luna hugged Celestia, nuzzling her chest. She parted herself and left.
Celestia remained confounded. She, quite literally, shrugged it off. “Eh, alright.” She went to go write the letter.
Cherry Jubilee walked through the unpaved Ponyville streets, taking a walk. She stopped by a group of bushes, thinking to herself.
“I hope this here wedding goes well,” Cherry said. “I’d hate to have to come all this way and extended the duration of my trip for this long only to be here for when the wedding when it all goes up in flames.”
“Oh, gee.” Cherry wiped her hoof across her head. “What if the opposite happens? What if the wedding goes too well, and - and - and Applejack’s for Twilight might come back to the surface simply because she’s been pushed on by all the highs of emotions goin’ ‘round that accompany weddin’s?!”
Cherry started to fantasize.
“I now pronounce you husband and wife.” A male pastor announced to Rarity and Hayseed. There were cheers from all around from the audience.
“Everypony!” There was silence as Twilight Sparkle spoke up. “I … I have a confession to make. I didn’t realize until Rarity’s wedding, but now I see it true and clear as day! Applejack!” Twilight turned to Applejack. “I love you, Applejack! I can’t believe I denied for this long!”
“What? Really? Aw, shucks. I love you, too, Twilight!” Applejack ran forward. She embraced Twilight, and the two shared a passionate kiss.
“But … but what about me?” Cherry stuttered.
“Oh, uh, don’t worry, Cherry.” Applejack said. “We’ll find someone for you to substitute. Uh, here.” Applejack bent down and picked up APple Bloom by the scruff of her neck, plucking from thin air. “You can date my sister Apple Bloom! That’s close enough, right?”
“Noooo!” Cherry screamed while Apple Bloom puckered up.
“Aaah! It’s too horrible to even think about!” Cherry yelped, burying her chin into the dirt and covering her head while shivering in fear.
“Oh, come on.”
“Wha?” Cherry asked.
A Parasprite flew out from the bushes. A flash of light appeared next to it, and Discord, sans an eye, appeared. He grabbed the Parasprite and popped it back into his eye socket, where it turned back to his unmistakable yellow eyeball.
“What are you doing here?” Cherry asked.
“I was in the neighborhood. I heard there was a wedding going on, so I figured I’d swing by and see what all the hubbub was about. You know, lay my eyes on things, if you will.” Discord winked at her.
“No, I mean, what are you doing here? Aren’t you Discord, Spirit of Chaos? Shouldn't y’all be in a stone statue in the Royal Labyrinth?”
“Honestly!” Discord waved his hand, ignoring Cherry. “This is what you’re worried about now? Twilight Sparkle having a sudden change of heart and discovering her true feelings for Applejack after she’s already made her feelings on the issue very clear? Bleh, just saying ‘true feelings’ leaves a bad taste in my mouth.” Discord stuck his tongue out. “I swear, somepony needs to put a stop to all this soap opera drama! … And I know just the right pony for the job!”
Discord snapped his fingers and disappeared. Cherry Jubilee was left alone, and confused, but she was by and large, mostly confused.
Spike was skipping stones on the water by the bridge. Ever since he had done it with Rainbow Dash after his last (and so far final) screw-up, he found it a relaxing pastime.
Hayseed walked up the bridge. “Spike?”
“Oh. Hey, Hayseed.” Spike chucked another stone into the water. “What’s up?”
“Could I ask you to stop skipping stones for a sec?” Hayseed asked. “I got something important I want to ask you, and I’d rather have your full attention.”
“Oh… sure.” Spike grew concerned. He ceased his activity and walked up the bridge to him. “What do you need?”
“I assume y’all know about Rarity and I getting married. She accepted my proposal.”
“Kinda hard not to know. It’s all anyone will talk about …”
“Heh. Well, anyway, I was wondering … if it wouldn’t be too awkward for you, given your history with Rarity and all, if … you would be interested in being my best mare for the wedding?”
“Best mare?” Spike raised his eyebrow.
“Hey, don’t look at me!” Hayseed said. “I didn’t come up with the terminology! It’s not my fault we live in a female-dominant society!”
Spike and Hayseed shared a laugh.
“But no, seriously… will you do it, Spike?”
“Hmm.” Spike rubbed his chin in thought. “You know what? I think I will. Consider yourself as having your best mare.” Spike took Hayseed’s hoof.
“Wonderful.” Hayseed shook hooves with Spike. “Thank you, Spike. I’m glad to have you on board.”
“And then he just left.” Cherry said, gesturing her hoof while concluding her tale.
“Hmm. Alright.” Applejack rubbed her chin. “I can’t be too sure what he’s up to, but with Discord, you know it can’t ever be anything good … even when he is trying to be good.”
“I still can’t believe Celestia told you to let out and reform that monster,” Cherry said.
“Yeah. I can’t either, at times … hmm?” Applejack’s ears stood up straight when she saw something unusual heading her and Cherry’s way.
Twilight Sparkle and Fluttershy were walking together, which was by itself not strange, but the way they were walking so close to each other, stumbling as if they were drunk, whispering into the ears of one another, pulling back and giggling like school fillies most definitely was. It was almost like… they were a couple now.
After being recruited into being Hayseed’s best mare, Spike returned to his house and went to his room to make preparations.
Rifling through a basket of beauty products, Spike pulled out a cologne. He squirted it into the air and sniffed it.
“Ugh.” Spike groaned. “Definitely not. Can cologne expire? Because this definitely smells like it.” He tossed the bottle aside and continued his search through the basket to find a cologne which smelled good enough to use for the wedding.
“Hello, Spike,” came a low, seductive growl.
Spike stiffened up in fear and turned around. He was perplexed when he saw Rarity leaning against the door. “Rarity?”
“Yes, Spike, it’s me.” Rarity said, walking into the room.
“What are you doing here?” Spike asked, looking at the ground.
“Well, I did some thinking, Spike, and I had an epiphany.” Rarity said, walking up to him. She wrapped her hooves around him and pulled his head into her chest. “Hayseed was a good fling, but you were always the only for me.”
“What?”
Rarity puckered up her lips and moved in to kiss his head.
Spike shook himself out from her grip, pushing her hooves off him. “Rarity, are you sure you’re feeling alright? I think there’s something going on with your head.”
“Aww. Don’t be like that, Spikey. I’m fine.”
Rarity grabbed him by the shoulders and pushed him up against the wall. She puckered up again, her lips making squeaking, popping noises.
“Ugh, no! Get off!”
“Hold on here, Cherry …” Applejack comforted Cherry, stroking her shoulder. “I’m gonna get to the bottom of this and figure out what the hay is going on here.”
“Twilight?” Applejack asked, walking up to her and Fluttershy. “What are y’all doing here? What’s all … this with Fluttershy?”
“Oh, haven’t you been told?” Twilight said, giggling and giving Fluttershy a bump with her wing. Fluttershy responded in kind. “Fluttershy and I are a couple now.”
“What?” Applejack’s face skewered up with confusion. Cherry Jubilee was also puzzled. “After all the drama we went through after I confessed my feelings to you?”
“Yup.” Twilight nodded, satisfied with herself.
“Nah.” Applejack said, causing Twilight’s eyes to open wide. “I don’t believe it.”
Meanwhile, Rarity continued to try and charm Spike. “Oh, come on, Spikey!” Rarity complained as Spike wormed his way out of her grip and ran across the room, jumping up onto Twilight’s bed. “Just one kiss, that’s all I ask! A long one, hehehe!”
“So, Applejack, are you upset about me being with Fluttershy?” Twilight asked, taunting Applejack with a smile. Fluttershy whipped and wrapped her tail around Twilight’s muzzle, and Twilight took in a deep whiff of her scent.
Applejack crossed one leg in front of the other. “I’m more upset about y’all lying to me.”
“Really?” Twilight asked, she and Fluttershy not expecting that, given the surprised expressions they had.
“Sure. Twilight, if y’all don’t want to try being with me, that’s fine, but at least tell me your real reason for doin’ so! I can accept that maybe you’re already in a relationship with somepony else. What I can’t accept is one of my best friends straight-up lyin’ to my face!”
“So… does this mean you’re happy with Cherry Jubilee?” Twilight asked with an innocent grin.
Applejack sighed, bring a hoof over her head. “Why does everypony keep having to ask me that? What do I have to do to prove it? Yes, Twilight Sparkle, I am very happy with Cherry Jubilee. We’re happy together. We’re a couple.”
“And… you’ll never leave her?” Twilight asked.
“Never. I’m the loyal type, Twi, you know that. Not unless she does something I just can’t forgive, like push Apple Bloom in front of a train or something.”
Twilight cracked another smile. “Perfect.”
Twilight and Fluttershy popped, their bodies disappearing into clouds of pink mist which rose up into the air and faded away on the wind.
“What? Oh… oh no.” Applejack groaned and facehooved. She sighed. “Okay, Discord, I know it was you behind this mess … and I can almost appreciate what you’re tryin’ to do. Almost.”
“Applejack?” Cherry asked. “I am so terribly confused right now. What is going on?”
Applejack sighed. “It’s uh, complicated, Cherry … well, you know what? Actually, no, it’s not. Discord must have saw that you were getting worried about me with the wedding comin’ up and he decided to try and help… in his own, special, Discord kind of way.”
Applejack took Cherry’s hoof.
“Did you mean what you said?” Cherry asked. “That y’all would never leave me?”
“I meant it, Cherry. Every word. So don’t push any of my family in front of a train, alright?”
Cherry chuckled. “Okay. Deal.”
The two of them kissed.
Rarity tensed up before pouncing onto the bed, pinning Spike with her front hooves. “Just one little kiss, Spikey-Wikey!”
“No!” Spike put his claw on Rarity’s nose and pushed her back as she tried to smooch him. “Get … off!” Spike mustered up the strength to push her off, pressing his claws into her stomach and sending her rolling off the bed, where she grunted as she tumbled to the floor.
“One,” Spike said, getting to his feet and standing on the bed, “I am with Celestia now. Two, I already to be Hayseed’s best mare at the wedding, and three, you’re being disloyal!”
Rarity got to her hooves. She smiled and chuckled before her body poofed away in trails of pink mist.
“Ugh. Of course.” Spike rubbed his temples. “It had to be you, Discord, it had to be you.”
Discord made his presence overt with a teleport.
“Yes, Spike, it had to be me.” Discord said. “Brave for figuring out so quickly by the way, very impressive.” He clapped, making a series of tinier versions of his hands emerged from his palms, which went to sprout tinier versions of themselves, and so on, so he could give the illusion of an audience’s applause.
“I’m not dumb,” Spike said, “I’m just youthful and inexperienced.”
“So you are.” Discord dismissed the appendages.
“Discord, was all of that really necessary?” Spike asked. “You couldn’t have just walked up to me and asked me?”
“Well, of course not!” Discord twirled around. “That would be too easy, and not nearly as much fun! But tell me, Spike, did the experience help you to fully realize and finalize your feelings in regards to those two ponies, the one you loved, and the you love?” Discord rested his chin on his claws, eager to hear Spike’s answer.
Spike rocked his head back and forth, mulling it over. “Yeah, okay … I guess it kinda did.”
“Perfect! Then it was all worth it. My mission here is done.” Discord poofed away, disappearing in pink cotton candy smoke clouds rather than his usual flash.
Spike went around and picked up the pillow of Twilight’s bed. He picked up the blanket and bundled the blanket around the pillow and hefted the bundle up over his head. He roared and threw it to the floor.
“I only said that to get you to leave,” Spike muttered quietly in case Discord could still hear him. Spike shook his fist at the air. “I already decided on what my feelings were. Ugh. What a twerp.” Spike hopped off the bed. “I should get back to getting ready for the wedding.” He glanced at the bundle. “And probably make up Twilight’s bed before she goes to sleep tonight.”
The sound of knocking was the only interruption Rarity could hear over the fervor of her working on her wedding dress.
“Rarity? It’s Twilight. Could I come in?”
“Why, of course, darling.” Twilight opened the door, shutting it gently behind the hear. “What can I do for you?”
“I wanted to talk to you.” Twilight said. “About the wedding. Are you sure you’re ready for this?”
“Why, darling, I thought we already went over this!” Rarity exclaimed, using her magic to levitate scissors and several needles at once, pulling all of them on and through the elaborate white dress on her mannequin.
“I know, but… are you sure that you’re sure that you’re ready? Have you considered everything that goes into getting married?”
“Whatever do you mean, darling?”
“Oh, I don’t know.” Twilight rubbed her chin. “Let’s maybe start with… children? Have you and Hayseed discuss the possibility of having children? What about your house payments? How are you two going to find time to manage your businesses together while still finding the time to spend with each other? What about Sweetie Belle?”
“Oh, gee, I… I hadn’t thought about all of that,” Rarity said.
“Well, you should,” Twilight said. “Let me clear, I don’t want you to not get married, Rarity.”
Twilight left the room, pausing before she pulled the door shut.
“I just want you to think about it before you do.”
Twilight closed the door with a soft thud.
“Oh … hmm.” Rarity sat down on her haunches. The glow of her magic faded from the needles and other instruments, dropping them all towards the ground, where they dangled from the mannequin.
Applejack and Cherry Jubilee arrived at the Carousel Boutique, Cherry galloping in while Applejack held the door for her, Applejack closing the door behind her.
They found Rarity lying with her head sideways on the table.
“You said you needed to see us, Rarity?” Cherry Jubilee. “Right away?”
“We got here as fast as we could.”
“Thank you, darlings. Oh, it’s horrible!” Rarity wailed, shifting her head onto the other side.
“What?” Cherry asked. “What is it?”
“Twilight Sparkle came in while I was working on my wedding dress …”
“Yes?” Cherry asked, biting her lip.
“And - and she made me think!” Rarity shouted.
“ … you made us come all this way … because Twilight Sparkle … made you think,” Cherry said, squinting her eyes shut as the words left a bitter taste on her tongue. “What?”
“Yeeeaaahh …” Applejack drawled. “You’re gonna wanna get used to that if you’re gonna be friends with her.”
“Oh, but that’s not all, darlings! She got me thinking about all these - all these things! Things I hadn’t thought about! Like children! Children! What if Hayseed wants a child? I don’t want a child, do you have any idea what that will do to my figure? And - and Sweetie Belle. How is this going to affect Sweetie Belle suddenly having a stallion in the house? Ooh… maybe Twilight’s right. Maybe I’m not - not cut out to be a wife … I’m not ready for this.”
“Aw, shoot. Are y’all kiddin’ me?” Applejack asked. “So what if this maybe a little more than you bargained for?”
“Hmm? What do you mean, Applejack?”
“Listen. Twilight’s asking you about all these things you didn’t stop to think about, right?”
“Yes …” Rarity nodded, quite interested in hearing what Applejack had to say.
“So?” Applejack said. “Follow your heart, Rarity. Learn from my mistakes. Don’t do what I did.” Applejack put a hoof to her chest. “For so long, I knew what I wanted… but I didn’t tell Twilight because I was afraid I couldn’t get it without sacrificing sumthun else. And look at me! I finally did tell her. I went through with it… and maybe I didn’t get what I wanted out of it …”
Applejack picked up and held Cherry’s hoof. “But I’d say I got something even better. Rarity …”
Applejack walked over to the table and grabbed Rarity’s hooves. “You’ve wanted this for so long. I’ve watch you pine after stallion after stallion. Blueblood, Trenderhoof… and none of them worked out for you. Don’t let go of the first good guy you’ve found who actually cares about you, and let ‘em slip out of your grasp just because you got cold hooves.”
“I… you know what, Applejack? You’re absolutely right.” Rarity stood up, pushing herself out of her seat. “So what if there’s still consequences we need to talk about it? It can wait until after the festivities are over! The wedding is still on! Oh! I still need to go and finish my dress!” Rarity left the kitchen and galloped up the stairs.
“Hahaha, yeah! You go, Rarity! That’s my girl!” Applejack cheered. Cherry cleared her throat. “In a strictly platonic sense, of course. Thought that’d be obvious.”
Cherry shifted uncomfortably. “Well … I might still be a bit shaken up after earlier.”
It was a day before the wedding was set to happen.
Spike was standing at the closet, admiring his tuxedo hanging on its coat inside. He wondered if there was something he could do to spice it up a bit before the wedding day.
He heard the door creak. Celestia walked inside, being slow to close the door behind her.
“Hey. Come in, come in,” Spike said to her, gesturing her over.
“Hello, Spike,” Celestia walked up to him. “What are you doing?”
“Ah, just looking at my tux,” Spike said. He rubbed his thumb across his chin. “You think there’s something I could do to give it a bit more flair before the wedding? Like, maybe dye the shirt blue, or add more sequins?”
“I think it looks lovely just the way it is,” Celestia said. “Could I pull you away from… looking at you tux for a minute? I would like to talk to you.”
“Sure,” Spike walked Celestia over to a couch. He sat down on one side, and Celestia sat down on the other, taking up two of the cushions. “What did you want to talk about?”
Celestia tapped her hooves together. She seemed uncertain. “I’ve been doing some thinking, Spike and …” Celestia turned her head to face him head-on. “I think we should take a break.”
“Wha-what? A break?” Spike asked. “What do you mean, a break? Have I - have I not been good enough to you? I mean, I know I haven’t always been the best boyfriend and did more than my fair share of stupid stuff, but… but still, am I not good enough?”
Celestia chuckled and shook her head. “No, Spike. It’s nothing like that. I just… I’ve come to realize you are much, much younger than I am. Which sounds like a strange to suddenly realize, but there you have it. And… it might be best to wait until you’re a just a little older and … grown into yourself more.”
“I’m plenty grown.” Spike crossed his arms, resentment in his voice.
“Yes, you are, Spike. But you still have some more growing to do.” Celestia said.
“Well, how much growing do I have to do until you’re happy!?”
Celestia took Spike raising his voice at her with the utmost restraint. Spike scooted away on the couch after realizing he had raised his voice at her.
“Some.” Celestia replied obliquely. “I know you’re upset, Spike, but please, consider a few things. For one, you haven’t even gone through puberty. Not properly, at least. Second, weren’t you the one admitting to, how did you put it, your fair share of stupid stuff you did? Not telling Rarity about the bouquet? Like expressing the idea you could win Rarity back just because Hayseed was having financial troubles? Running into the Everfree Forest? Stuff which you could have potentially avoided with a few more years of growth and maturity under your belt?”
Spike let out a deep breath. “Okay, yeah … I see your point.” Spike looked at the floor. “Alright, fine. I’ll do it. I’ll wait for you. I’ll wait until I’m as grown up as you want me to be.”
Spike pointed a stern finger at her.
“But the second I’m as grown as you like, you’d better take me back quick, because I won’t be happy if you decide to go back on your word.”
“Oh my. So fierce. So commanding.” Celestia noted jokingly. “I don’t think being fierce suits you, Spike. But yes …” Celestia reached her wing and draped it around Spike’s shoulders. “I’ll wait for you, too, and when the moment comes, I promise I will take you back … and not one minute later.”
Celestia leaned and gave Spike a kiss on the head. Spike’s cheeks turned pink. He curled up and watched Celestia step off the couch and walk out the door, the door creaking as she left. Spike let out a sigh. He wondered how long it would be …
The big day!
Twilight Sparkle and Applejack, with Cherry as her plus one arrived first out of Rarity’s more intimate friends, soon followed by Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy.
“Hey girls!” Dash greeted them.
“Hello, Rainbow Dash. Excited for the wedding?” Twilight asked.
“You bet!” Dash said.
“Still haven’t that phobia of commitment thing going on?” Twilight added.
“Oh, no,” Rainbow Dash said. “Fluttershy helped me to see that I didn’t have any phobia, I was just rationalizing and masking my anxiety about a big change happening in one of my friend’s lives. But, uh, word of advice, if Fluttershy offers you the ‘percussive therapy’… get out. Just - just get out.”
“She left me no choice,” Fluttershy said defensively at Twilight’s questioning gaze. “And it worked, didn’t it?”
“Well …” Twilight looked around. Most everypony was present and seated, from Rarity’s parents to Applejack’s family. “Looks like the ceremony will start soon. We should take our places.”
The bridesmaids went up onto the platform, where Hayseed, Luna, and Celestia were already present. They waited there until Rarity made her grand entrance, appearing in a stunning white dress with a large cowl, long train, and several fringes hanging off the sides in a fan shape.
“Wow.” Hayseed muttered, stunned by the dress.
Rarity walked up to the platform, taking her place besides Hayseed.
“Do we have the ring?” Luna asked.
“Yes, Your Majesty!” Spike waddled down the red carpet, holding up the ring box.
“Good. Then let us begin.” Luna cleared her throat. “We are gathered here today to witness the union of two lovers, Rarity Belle and Hayseed Turnip Truck. Hayseed, do you take Rarity to be your lawfully wedded wife, to take care of her in sickness and in health, and be together with her in any kind of weather? To love her til death do you part?”
“I do.”
“And Rarity - oh, wait, hang on, there’s another vow, it looks to be a custom … and also to, um, 'compliment your wife and tell her she looks beautiful, regardless of how she actually looks?'”
The bridesmaids complained. “Rarity!”
“Whaaaat? It’s my wedding!”
“Well, I’d like think I’m a polite enough guy that I’d say that anyway, but okay. Yes, Princess, Luna, I do,” Hayseed said.
“And Rarity Belle…” Luna sifted through the papers, trying to make sure they weren’t any custom vows she missed this time. “Do you take Hayseed to be your lawfully wedded husband, to take care of him in sickness and in health, and be together with him in any kind of weather? To love him til death do you part... “
Rarity smiled.
“And to always allow him to attend the family reunion every year, regardless of the circumstances?”
Rarity raised an eyebrow.
“I love my family… and hey, it’s my wedding, too.” Hayseed said.
“Hmph! Touche.” Rarity admitted with a smile. “I do.”
“If anypony has any reason why these two should not be wed, speak now or forever your hold peace,” Luna said.
Twilight nudged Spike on the shoulder. “Spike? This is your last chance to object.”
Spike thought about it. Even considering the ‘break’ Celestia was making him go through …
“You know what, Twi? I’m good.”
“I now pronounce you husband and wife,” Luna said. “You may kiss the bride.”
Hayseed pulled up Rarity’s veil, and the two of them kissed. The audience cheered and clamoured, clapping and stomping.
Hayseed grabbed Rarity and lifted her up into his hooves. “Oop!” Rarity expressed before giggling. Hayseed carried her down the aisle and out a ways, where a chariot was waiting for them.
The bridesmaids and Spike followed them, waving them off as they climbed into the chariot. Once inside and Hayseed had set Rarity down, Rarity threw Hayseed against the seats before kissing him, pinning him before she used her magic to close the door. The ponies driving it whinnied before galloping away it, spinning its wheels.
Twilight and the girls giggled. “Well, I suppose all’s well that ends well.”
“Well, almost all.” Applejack whispered, gesturing subtly to the sky. Discord was floating around in the sky above them.
“Oh … Discord.” Twilight said awkwardly, nervous he might still have a chance and a trick up his sleeve to ruin everything. “What are you up to?”
“Hmm? Oh, nothing much, just waiting for my date to get here. I’ve found someone. Celestia hooked us up together, actually.” Discord answered.
“Oh, that’s nice … wait, who? Who in their right mind would go out with ...”
The ground began to shake. Twilight’s eyes widened.
“Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me. Surely that’s not … it is, isn’t it?”
Antioch arrived on the scene, wearing a red cocktail dress around her. Where she found one in her size, Twilight would never know. Perhaps dragons had tailors.
“Hey there, sweetie.” Antioch waved, flicking her fingers at Discord.
“Hello, sugar.” Discord flew up up to Antioch and hooked his arm around her’s. “Shall we?”
“We shall!” Antioch said, smiling. She galloped off, taking Discord with her, Discord shaking from her arm like a loose banner billowing in the wind.
Twilight, Spike, and the girls chuckled awkwardly at first, before laughing genuinely at Discord’s misfortune as he was swung up and down.
“Well, I’m glad she found someone at least,” Twilight said. “Come on, girls. Let’s go home.”
Years later…
Twilight Sparkle flew through the Canterlot morning sky, arriving at a cave carved into the side of the mountain. She landed inside, flapping her wings to stretch them before tucking them away. She walked into the cave, where Princess Celestia was waiting for her, the wrinkles on her face doing nothing to diminish the brightness of her smile.
“Hello, Twilight Sparkle. I’ve been waiting for you,” Celestia said.
“Yup. And I sure made you wait, didn’t it?”
“Yes. This is a visit that’s been long overdue.”
“I’m sorry.”
‘All that matters is that you’re here now.” Celestia said. “Shall we?” She and Twilight began walking further into the cave.
“How have you been?” Twilight asked.
“Wrinkles aside, I’ve been well,” Celestia said. They chuckled. “How are your friends doing?”
“My friends? Hmm, well…” Twilight tapped her chin, trying to recall all the events they developed since the last time she visited Celestia. “Well, Hayseed and Rarity are working on their second child?”
“Second?”
“Yeah.”
“My goodness, does time fly. What else?”
“Applejack and Cherry Jubilee are still happy on their new-ish still apple/cherry farm in Dodge Junction … Apple Bloom is taking over Sweet Apple Orchards, because Big Macintosh is getting on in years, Fluttershy’s veterinarian business is doing well, and Rainbow Dash is Captain of the Wonderbolts. Let’s see, did I miss anything? … Oh! And Pinkie Pie is still running Sugarcube Corner, working the Cakes’ daughters to the bone. How is Spike doing?”
“He’s doing well, thank you.”
“I have to ask, Princess Celestia, why do you keep him living all the way out here?”
“Well, it’s not like I keep him in the castle. There’s not enough space, and ponies would freak out.”
“Aah… hmm… does he ever, you know, come down with a case of dragon greed?”
“Sometimes. But a little tender loving and -”
“Agh, no, stop. I regret asking. T.M.I, Celestia, T.M.I.”
“Hmm. I’m glad, after all these years, you’ve grown comfortable enough with me to address by my first name, Twilight.”
“Likewise.” Twilight smiled.
“We’re here. Here he is. Spike?” Celestia said.
“Hmm?” Spike asked, snorting in his deep voice, lifting his pointed dragon snout off the ground, his claw still firmly clutched around his quill as he penned his next work of literary genius, his hulking body scraping up against the ceiling of the cave. Celestia might have to hollow it out more soon if he kept putting on pounds. “Oh! Hello, Twilight Sparkle. Is is time for your visit again already?”
“Yeah, it is,” Twilight said.
“It is just me, or as we’ve grown more casual, Spike has grown more formal?” Celestia observed, prompting another round of laughing.
“So, how goes writing your next great literary masterpiece, Spike?”
“Pretty well,” Spike answered, scratching his chin. “I’m almost down to the last chapter as soon as I finish this page.”
“Well, that’s good. Anything else new?” Twilight asked.
“Not that I can think of, no,” Spike said. “Unless you might need something to spice up your bedroom. Celestia knows this great -”
“T.M.I again! T.M.I!”
“Right. Sorry.” Spike grinned sheepishly.
“I forgive you,” Twilight said. She flew up to him. “Come here, you.”
Spike lowered his neck, and Twilight laid her head across his nose, giving him a nuzzle.
“I still love you, Spike. Even though you’ve moved out and in with Celestia, even though you’ve grown into a huge, mature dragon, and Sweetie Belle is studying magic under me… you’ll still always be my number one assistant to me.”
“I love you, too, Twilight.”
Twilight lifted her head up. She locked eyes with Spike, sharing with him a tender gaze. She flapped her wings back, flying away from him.
“Well, bye for now, I guess.” Twilight said. “I’ll come visit again next year. Same time?”
As Twilight turned to fly away from the cave, Spike grunted. “Twilight?”
Twilight stopped. “Yes?”
“Can we make it in the next six months this time? I miss you.”
Twilight smiled. “Sure. But you know I’m a busy pony. The moon doesn’t raise itself, you know.”
Celestia shook her head and sighed. “A shame Luna decided to retire when she did. I had hoped you would have been my successor.”
“Well, life doesn’t always work out the way we hoped, does it, Celestia?” Twilight said. “And who knows? Maybe you and Spike can visit us early when Rarity and Hayseed have their second foal.”
“Second?” Spike asked. “Goodness, has it-”
“Been that long already, yes, I know. It has,” Twilight said. “Bye!” Twilight waved her hoof at them before flying out of the cave.
Celestia watched her go. She didn’t notice Spike’s tail rearing up behind her, snatching out at her and wrapping around her, pulling her towards him.
“And don’t think I’ve forgotten about you just because Twilight was here. You need your fair share of affection, too.” Spike gave Celestia a kiss on the cheek. “I love you, Celestia.”
“I love you, too, Spike.”