Once in a Lifetime
The sun was shining in the sky, beating down on a young man as he walked. The cuts on his back showed through the back of his sweat soaked white t-shirt. The wounds had stopped bleeding, but it didn’t stop the pain he felt as he took another step on the concrete roads towards his house. He looked down to his phone as the battery died.
“Great,” He said to his phone. He put his ear buds into his pockets and continued walking.
He looked up at the approaching neighborhood, where the sidewalks were cracked and the fences were falling on themselves. The houses looked like they were on their last legs, with the roofs offering the first step towards the end, as they were already crumbling.
“Don’t get jumped, don’t get jumped…” He said to himself as he walked forward. The streets were silent, but one couldn’t be sure even in the day if something would happen.
To keep himself calm, he decided to sing to himself, maybe pass the time a little faster.
I stand tall in the face of danger,
And I laugh at the devil’s name
It doesn’t matter if I survive it
Cause in the end it all feels the same.
They tell you that you’re worth nothing
And you say that they are wrong,
Living your life just aint the best
When you’ve been lying to yourself for so damn long.
Some say life is worth living
Others say it sucks.
You can’t stop the speeding bullet
But you can-
“Oh f-,” He stopped in his tracks as a figure moved from behind the broken down car in front of him.
The figure was wearing a long trench coat, and he couldn’t see the face. But he knew he was in trouble. The figure got close enough that he could make out his eyes, and then his face, and finally his horns. Wait…
“Hello there Jeff, mind getting in my van?” The figure asked. His clawed hand moved from the sleeves and pointed at the van on the other side of the street. It had a name on the side that said ‘Suspicious Van’ and definitely wasn’t there a few moments ago.
Jeff didn’t respond as he looked at the face he knew very well. The wicked grin and the patchwork face told him what he already knew.
“Discord?” Jeff asked. He rubbed his eyes before looking up again, this time a cardboard cutout of the draconequus.
“Looks like him,” Jeff heard from behind. He turned and saw Discord with a camera taking pictures of the cutout. “Handsome, isn’t he?”
Jeff blinked before his voice came back. “What are you doing here on earth?” Jeff asked. He really wasn’t prepared for this.
“Actually, I’m still in Equestria,” Discord said. At Jeff’s blank look, Discord continued. “I’m trapped in some stone, so there isn’t much to do besides visit some other universes. This one by far is my favorite.” Discord motioned to the sky, where the blue sky was less visible from the clouds. Most of them were clouds anyway. The smoke from the nearby factories blended right in.
“So, what do you want?” Jeff asked. Discord moved the glasses from in front of his face and sighed.
“Since coming here, I’ve gotten a lot of time to think,” Discord reached over and grabbed a clock from a nearby table that said ‘For Sale’. He winded it up and then dropped it into his head, where it exploded and he blew out smoke into Jeff’s face.
“Think about what?” Jeff asked in between coughs.
“I’ve had so much fun in equestria. While I can’t use much of my magic here, I have more than enough to go back, so I was thinking…” Discord said. He shuffled his feet around nervously, blushing a brighter red than applebloom’s bow.
“Just get on with it,” Jeff said. He looked around the neighborhood, wondering if anyone was watching what was going on.
“Alright, I was just trying to have some fun. Anyways, I can take another mortal with me back. I’ve been looking around, and after watching you for a while, I think you could use the much needed vacation. So, pack your bags and we’ll be off,” Discord said. He dropped a few empty suitcases around Jeff before picking his up and turning around.
“No.”
Discord stopped in his tracks. His suitcases opened, revealing rocks and a half broken anvil. Discord turned to face Jeff, who was shaking his head. Discord put his finger in his ear and pulled out a rabbit. The rabbit pulled out a carrot and smiled.
“What’s up doc?” It asked before jumping back in Discord’s ear. Discord checked his pockets and pulled out a snake. He slid the snake into his ear before looking back at Jeff.
“What did you say?” Discord asked.
“I said no,” Jeff said. He didn’t look away from Discord’s gaze, and he didn’t flinch when Discord squinted his eyes.
“Tell me… Why?” was all Discord asked.
“Do you really want to know?” Jeff asked.
Discord rubbed his really long beard before nodding his head slowly. Then, he put his claw over Jeff’s mouth and smiled.
“Just a sec,” Discord said. He teleported out of Jeff’s vision for a second, before he came back with a moving bag over his shoulder. “I think she’ll want to hear this too,”
Discord dropped the bag from his shoulder and it landed promptly on the anvil. The bag opened, to reveal a dazed Celestia trying to recover from the brain damage. She crawled out of the bag before giving Discord a glare that could have melted ice.
Discord, of course, melted on the spot and the puddle spoke to her.
“So Tia, this human, who has lived a life of pain and sorrow, does not want to live in a world of harmony. He was about to tell me why,” Discord said. The puddle eyes looked to Jeff, who was having trouble keeping himself sane. Celestia turned to him, and her eyes went soft. The look she had changed to confusion and then worry.
“Are you alright?” Celestia asked. She touched the side of his face, where a large cut had caused blood to drip onto his neck. Jeff didn’t flinch as the wound throbbed and fresh blood started to seep through.
“I’m fine,” Jeff said with the best smile he could offer at the moment.
“What happened?” Celestia asked. She activated her magic to treat the wounds. Jeff could feel the cut healing over, but this only made him more aware of the cuts on his back and the sprained ankle he was walking on.
“Really, he’s fine. What is this, the third day this week? He’s used to it,” Discord said. He had solidified and was flipping through a calendar.
“What being would allow her subjects to succumb to this?” Celestia asked in a low voice. Discord held a claw on Jeff’s lips so he wouldn’t speak.
“That isn’t the point here,” Discord started. “I want to take him to equestria and see what happens. Whether more chaos ensues for my own pleasure, or he lives a peaceful life, well that’s a mystery,” Discord said.
“I see, and why wouldn’t you want that?” Celestia asked. She had finished healing the cut and was looking at his back. She winced at the biggest cut, which was a gash across his shoulder blade and ending on the middle of his back.
“I’ve read my share of fanfiction, I’ve dreamed my own fantasies. Equestria is the land we all dream about in this world,” Jeff started. He looked at Celestia and then Discord before sighing. “And that’s why someone from this world isn’t meant to go to equestria,” Jeff said.
“But why not?” Celestia asked. She didn’t understand, and Jeff really didn’t want to tell her about the world.
“Because… because… in everything I’ve read and everything I’ve imagined, if me, or someone else was to enter Equestria, then Equestria would change. Violence, anger, pain. All of it will come with us,” Jeff said. He saw Celestia was about to respond, and he cut her off.
“Do you know how I got these scars? What about the fresh cuts? Everything I’ve endured up until now will follow me, no matter how far I run,” Jeff could feel his wounds throbbing even more now. The pain in his chest was increasing, and he thought he felt steel making contact with his skin again.
“Since I was young, my father belted me for talking back. He threw bottles at me to get me to shut up. Even when he died, my mother married some bigger asshole because he was all she could get. Then, my mom dies and leaves me with the guy. He didn’t even let me go to her funeral,” Jeff was letting out tears. He could feel the salt in his tears burning when they contacted the cuts under his chin.
Discord was holding a book upside down that read ‘Cool Stories for Bros’. He stopped writing as he yawned. Celestia was listening quietly, and she waited for Jeff to continue.
“In school, I was kicked and punished for my malnutrition. I couldn’t fight back because I was weaker than them, and the kids didn’t have anything else to do, because even though we were all just as doomed in life, they felt they were somehow better than me. Even now, earlier today, I was thrown into the town dump and attacked by the local vultures,” Jeff threw his bag open and pulled out the mauled and ripped shirt and pants. They were covered in blood.
“I’m… I’m sorry to hear that,” Celestia said in a quiet voice. She continued staring at the torn clothing, but Jeff wasn’t finished.
“Not all of that blood is mine…” Jeff started again. Celestia looked up quickly at him, but he was just staring at his hands. “I found the guys that threw me in and I… I just lost it. One of them ended up being food for the vultures, and some other guy managed to crawl away. The last guys passed out, and I took his clothes,” Jeff finished. He looked up to Celestia, his eyes full of years of built up pain and fury. And still, Celestia could see the young boy she first saw him as.
“After what I did, I don’t deserve to go to equestria. I need to just go home and read some more fanfiction, because that’s all that’ll get my mind off of today,” Jeff said, lowering his head. Discord was sleeping on the ground, the book covering his face. Celestia used her hoof to pick his head up and gave Jeff a smile.
“I think that with a heart as pure as yours, equestria is better off,” Celestia said.
Jeff shook his head. “That’s not it,” He said. Discord raised an eyebrow from where he was on the ground.
“Are you going or not? I have other important things to do,” Discord said.
“No.” Jeff said once again. This time he gave a smile as he responded.
“Why?” Celestia asked. She wasn’t keen on having a different species sent to her peaceful city, but Jeff seemed like he deserved something like this.
“Because it wouldn’t be the same,” Jeff said. He took out a notepad from his pocket that had a red stain on the corner. “The way that authors depict equestria and the stories that come with it give equestria a mysterious feeling. There are so many ways that equestria can be like, but when you finally figure it out, then the feeling is gone. I wouldn’t be able to think about it any different than I view the world I already live in. Imagining the perfect world is better than seeing a less than perfect world,” Jeff said.
Celestia was nodding as he finished. She looked up at the sky and sighed. The pollution blocked off much of the sun, but she understood his reasoning now. She looked at Discord who was rising from the ground and stretching his limbs.
“Then I think I should be heading back. Discord, take me back,” Celestia said. Discord grumbled something before he held claws up. “Just remember, this is a once in a lifetime opportunity, don’t regret it,” Celestia said. Jeff shook his head.
“I regret a lot of things, but this won’t be one of them,” Jeff said. Celestia vanished in a flash of light and Discord was left with Jeff.
“Then I’ll be off as well. I’m still studying some of the ways you humans create chaos, seeing as I may have lost my touch,” Discord said. He turned and walked away as Jeff continued walking down the street.
“I don’t care what they say, you were best villain,” Jeff said as he walked. He didn’t see Discord stop, but he could have guessed that the draconequus smiled.