//------------------------------// // The Second-Rate Escape // Story: The Tunes Are A-Changin' // by ShadeJak //------------------------------// “Shit, shit, SHIT!” I shouted, hopping from the sofa. “C’mon, we gotta take what we need and get outta here! Fast!” I was certain it was from the little incident two days ago. Cops have a thing against being in the wrong, typically expressed by making the one who proved them as such pay big-time. I was not about to get arrested and… no, we were pretty much animals from the look of things, and I’d seen enough horror stories about what they did to pets on house raids. If Tavi and I were going to get out of this alive, we had to escape and get to my parents’ place. Rushing to our bedroom I used my magic and floated an open backpack over next to me, then began floating in a few things I wanted to take. Wallets… check. Camera… check. My ipod… no way I was leaving that behind. Headphones… okay, maybe I wasn’t the smartest on basic essentials but some of these mattered to me. A box of nails for emergencies sat on a shelf in the nightstand that I also floated into the backpack in case the worst happened. The box containing the ring for my girlfriend I’d intended to give her back before this all started now floated in front of me. It represented everything I wanted to build with her, everything I’d hoped for, the chance for a normal life… no. I couldn’t leave it here. If… no, when the chance came and the time felt right again, I would do what I’d planned to do. Nodding, I floated the small box into the backpack with a few other things and rushed back into the living room, floating mine and Tavi’s cellphones in as well when I saw it still on the table. My ears twitched when I heard steps fast approaching outside. “Tavi?” I called out. “Coming, Vinyl!” my girlfriend rushed into the living room carrying of all things her cello case, though she didn’t seem particularly slowed down by it. I guess earth pony strength the show demonstrated was pretty accurate after all. “Babe, can we really lug that thing around?” I asked. “I’m not leaving it,” she said sternly. “I’ll use it to smash those sodding officers’ knees in if I have to.” Not about to argue with her as I knew the sentimental value she had in it, and probably being Octavia only increased that attachment, I prepared to lead her to the back, floating the backpack behind me when a loud, vicious pounding was heard at the front door. “OPEN UP RIGHT NOW!” A man’s voice I recognized as the officer from the other day bellowed, beating the door harder. “Mitch! Stop this! This is breaking and entering, and they didn’t do any—” another man’s voice began, but was cut off by the first one. “Shut it, Jim! I don’t care if they were buying ice tea or donating to a charity! No one makes fools out of the police, and I spent all day and night yesterday tracking the vehicle’s owners,” the first officer, Mitch, snapped. SHIT I thought to myself, nudging Octavia towards the kitchen where the other door was, but the moment we did I saw a baton smash through the front window, scraping the sides to clear away any glass left. The officer climbed in and paused when he got a full view of us, his partner entering shortly after and stopping halfway through the window as he stared in disbelief at us. A second of staring passed, before Mitch spoke. “What in the hell kind of pets are these?!” “You see them, too?!” the one named Jim asked, unable to stop staring. “They look like the things from that show my girlfriend likes…” “Uh, hey, look, guys… I know this is crazy but we’ve been having a really fucked up couple’a days here!” I said, trying to stop trembling. “Dude, I’m way sorry about the sending you flying and all, but you attacked my girlfriend for no reason and—” “The FUCK! It’s talking!” the one named Mitch shouted, finally finding words and drawing his gun at me. “You attacked an innocent?” Jim asked, astonished. I suspect he must have heard some of the story already, or maybe a version that was different from the details I had just given. “Is that really important right now when there’s these bug-eyed, talking horse-things right in front of us?” the first officer demanded, clearly not denying the accusation. “We were out buying food because we were turning into these… ponies… we had ice tea that him and his unruly thugs mistook for alcohol, as well as thinking we were underage! They attacked us when we tried to prove that wasn’t the case!” Tavi protested, prompting the first officer to turn his gun on her. It was pure luck I acted quickly enough to ensnare his gun with my magic enough that when he pulled the trigger he only grazed Tavi’s left hind leg rather then outright kill her. Still, seeing her hurt was more then enough to make me boil with rage. “How DARE YOU!” I screamed, my anger reaching its peak and suddenly, a weird wave of blue burst from our entertainment center’s speakers, knocking the cop into the sofa and causing him to drop his gun. His partner stared at us, then at him in disbelief, as if unsure of what to do. “Babe! Are you alright? Can you stand up” I asked, rushing over and putting my forehoof on my girlfriend’s shoulder. “Y-yes… I’ll be fine… j-just a graze is all,” she answered with a weak smile, getting up and gently nuzzling me to try and calm me down. I looked back at the two cops and floated my car keys off the coffee table. “Take the backpack and run, I’ll catch up!” I ordered her, the keys still in my mouth. With some hesitation, my girlfriend nodded and grabbed the bag with her teeth, leaping on the fallen officer’s chest as hard as she could and prompting a pained grunt from him as he probably lost his wind before she leapt out the window and rushed to where our car was. “We didn’t do anything wrong!” I snapped. “I… I believe you…” the one named Jim said softly. “J-just, hurry before he gets up!” I managed a small but genuine smile. “Thanks…” I floated the cello case up, not-so-accidentally hitting Mitch in the face with it on the first attempt before sending it outside and rushing out the window as well, following my girlfriend’s example of using the dirty cop as a stepping stone. Galloping to the car as fast as I could without losing my hold of my girlfriend’s beloved instrument, keys gripped firmly in my teeth, I reached the driver’s side where Octavia was waiting and dropped the keys, pushing the unlocking button with my hoof. Focusing, I opened the driver door and climbed in and across the seats, nudging the latch on the passenger door to open it for my girlfriend who immediately jumped in with our meager supplies. Last but not least I floated her cello case in and she hurriedly pushed it into the back seats. “Thank you…” Tavi said softly. “Thank you so much for bringing that.” Our moment was suddenly interrupted by the sound of a bullet impacting with the metal roof of our car. Peering through the front window I saw the first officer standing outside the open door with his gun aimed at us, his partner suddenly came out, trying to wrestle the gun from him only to get knocked back into the wall. “Fuck! He’s still after us!” I shouted, causing the keys to fall from my mouth. “Come on, come on!” I focused, trying to keep from panicking as I attempted to get the keys off the floor and into the ignition. Two tries later, I succeeded, but it wouldn’t turn. It took a second for me to remember nothing was on the brake pedal so it wouldn’t start. “Babe, turn the key when I get the pedal!” I ordered, my girlfriend climbing over top of me as I leaned down to the pedals and pushed down on the gas one. I smiled as I heard the car start and put my hooves on the steering wheel, but satisfaction turned to horror when I saw our friendly neighborhood psychopath in a badge rushing towards us. Gritting my teeth, I pushed the shift out of park and into reverse, and attempted to focus on the gas pedal with my magic. “Careful!” Octavia cried out as we backed into a sidewalk and into the lawn when I severely underestimated how much pressure I put on the pedal. “Sorry!” I replied, trying to keep calm as I nudged the shift into drive, thanking any deity that chose to listen for giving me the good sense to buy a car with auto-shift. Turning the wheel we sped into the lawn again, and through two signs before speeding straight ahead. “Anything else you plan on running into before we get out of here?” my girlfriend asked as she looked at the fallen signs through the rear window. “Look, you wanna drive this?” I asked, trying to turn again and once more going too fast for my own good, causing us to both nearly tumble out of our seats. “He’s getting into his car, let's go!” she yelled urgently as we saw the police car’s lights come on through the rear-view mirror, Jim rushing for the car but failing to get to it before Mitch backed the car almost as fast as we did and then sped forward, nearly hitting his partner before beginning to follow us through the apartment roads, being no more mindful of property damage then we were. “Oh God! He’s after us…” my girlfriend observed, staring wide-eyed through the rear window. Time for my back-up plan. “I had a feeling this might happen!” I said, accidentally hitting a wire trashcan and sending its contents spilling. “I don’t think that’s going to work…” she said. “Not my plan!” I replied with a smirk. “Get the box of nails out of the backpack! Hurry!” “Box of… Vinyl, this isn’t the Blues Brothers!” Octavia protested. “It’s our only chance to keep ‘em from chasin’ us, babe! Throw it!” I yelled. “On it,” she answered, fumbling around with the bag and pulling the box out with her hooves. “Right, here it is! Get the window open!” I heard a crack and saw the side mirror had been grazed. Glancing in the rear-view mirror I could see him withdrawing his gun back through his window. “Crap! He’s shooting at us!” I shouted, my heart racing now as I weaved through the streets and over some sidewalks. The officer began speeding up, clearly intent on ramming us. “I noticed!” Octavia answered, “Open the window!” Slapping my hoof on the switch, the passenger window opened and my girlfriend leaned out, her mane billowing in the wind as she flung the box as best she could and I floored the pedal. Through the mirror, I saw the box fall open, spilling a pile of nails on the road that the police car failed to avoid, blowing out both tires on one side and causing the car to jerk into the air and fishtail out of control before spinning out, sparks erupting from the side with the flat tires. “HA-HA! EAT IT, BITCH!” I cheered as I opened the window and looked behind me to blow a raspberry at that bastard of a cop to compensate for having no fingers to flip him off with, only to be punished for my negligence to what was in front of us when I felt something impact and shatter in the front of the car followed by the sound of something small rolling off the windshield. “Oh, that's lovely, Vinyl! You’ve just decapitated Jesus!” Octavia declared with a hint of annoyance as she looked out the window at what remained of Mrs. Finney’s latest lawn ornament, prompting an exasperated sigh from me as I finally got us off the grass and out onto the main roads. ~ The next half-hour on the highway proved a lot less stressful with no turns and with little traffic and plenty of open road I was able to experiment a little in managing the pedals with my magic. It did little to calm my nerves, however. We managed to get away from Officer Psycho and from the looks of it his partner wasn’t going to sell us out and may have at least tried to help us. Or at least I hoped it’d be that way. Either way we were at least safe for now and it wouldn't be long till we got to my parents. “How're ya holding up, babe?” I asked, glancing over at my girlfriend for a second as she sat on her side in the passenger seat. “Yes… I’m rather amazed I didn’t have a heart attack back there,” she replied. “Same with me,” I said, sighing and feeling my heart pound just slightly less. “How’s your leg?” I asked. “It’s fine, Vinyl… it just grazed me slightly, that’s all,” she answered. A second of silence passed and she laughed. “I have to admit, that was far more excitement then I’d ever imagined in my life.” “You’ve been with me for five years, babe! Where was the bar set?” I asked, smirking. “Somewhere below turning into talking ponies and getting chased out of the apartment village by a mad policeman,” Octavia replied. “Okay, I guess I never really expected either of those things to happen,” I mused. “But hey, at least we turned into really cute talking ponies!” I offered, trying to keep the mood light though this whole experience was still pretty weird to me. “Vinyl Scratch, what are you insinuating?” my girlfriend asked coyly, brushing back her mane with her forehoof. I swear she was blushing. “Hey, if I’m gonna be on the road running from crazy cops, I’m glad it’s with such a hot mare,” I said with a playful wink, prompting her to cover her face with her forehooves to hide a deeper blush she was probably feeling. The more we joked, the more tension seemed to fade, something that in our predicament I could appreciate. “I’m a horse, Vinyl… since when did you find equines attractive?” she asked. “Since I became one, obviously,” I replied. From what I saw with some of the fans, though, that reason not applying didn’t seem to stop them. “Four legs, a tail, being the fairer sex, still taking some getting used to… still, guess it’s just something else to share, huh?” I asked. “I suppose that’s one way of looking at it,” Octavia answered, sitting up again. “All I can say is your parents are in for quite a surprise…” I couldn’t help but wince a little. Seriously, how was I gonna even handle that? Hey mom, dad, check it out! You lost a son but got a daughter and not only that but she’s a horse! Oh, and your future daughter-in-law? Well she’s a horse, too! The mere idea of the looks on their faces when they discovered two ponies at their door claiming to be their son and his girlfriend was enough to make me wince again. “Yeah… are they ever,” I muttered, hanging my head a little and blowing my disheveled mane out of my face. We weren’t that much further, now; my folks’ house was maybe another five minutes away. “Still, did you see that, back there? The thing with the speakers?” “Yes, I think everyone did,” my girlfriend replied. “It was familiar…” “That memory that Discord freak put us through… Vinyl… well, the past Vinyl, she did something with her magic where she made some speakers blast him. Maybe that’s some kinda… I dunno… thing I can do?” I asked. “I wouldn’t know, but it certainly sounds useful should we deal with any manner of trouble from people again,” Octavia said. Didn’t do much good against Discord… I thought to myself. It was a little odd, thinking like that… like the Vinyl from then was me. I guess she was, actually. Just like the Octavia from back in a past life was the same one sitting with me, now; the same woman I had been madly in love with for years and still wanted a future with. My train of thought shut off when I saw the turn coming up. Managing to stop without sending me or my girlfriend face-first into the dashboard, I gently made a right turn and brought us into the suburban neighborhood where my parents lived. A few moments later and I found their house. I wish I could have called them, give them a little heads-up about us coming over and to be ready for the shock of their lives, but with me putting all my magic focus on working the car pedals and Octavia not having any way to really work a phone we didn’t have much of a choice. As I brought the car to a stop and put the shift in park, my eyes widened when I looked at the driveway and noticed the third car there. “Vinyl, what’s wrong?” my girlfriend asked. “Babe… my sister’s here. And probably my nieces,” I muttered, images of that messed-up nightmare I’d had last night playing in my mind already. “Well… better get this over with,” I said with a sigh, turning the car off and nudging up the door handle to prepare for what awaited us.