//------------------------------// // Chapter Fifty-Three TARDIS Blues, Part Two // Story: STAR TREK: EQUESTRIA // by Alicorne //------------------------------// CHAPTER FIFTY-THREE Tardis Blues: Part Two “But… Sunny is right here!” Ditzy protested. “She’s a physician, isn’t she?” Sunny propped herself up on one elbow and yawned. “Oh, yon machine is tryin’ t’ establish a link t’ nearest active Medical Facility. I ken ‘tis tryin’ t’ find me Sickbay.” She reached up and ran a hoof through her mane. She tugged a lock into visual range and fixed the little Fey with a stern look. “A-hem!” “Tyllae fix! All oaky-dokey!” The little mite beamed and fluttered her wings, summoning a pink aura that flitted forth and settled onto my Darling’s mane. Just like that her golden curls were back looking, if at all possible, even more lustrous and full than ever! Sunny squinted at the results and gave our Favorite Fey a warning look. “Now what’d ye do?” “Tyllae did good! Tyllae is sorry to make Sunny feel bad so Tyllae gave Sunny mane lika Sunny a Faery! Don’ needa alla those bottles of silly mane soap, nope, nope, nope! Just wash off with water inna shower an be all pretty in no time at all every time, yep, yep, yep! Sunny gets to sleep little bit longer inna morning now! Tyllae did good! Not mad at poor, little Tyllae for being a grouchy-grouch now?” She flitted up to huggle Sunny’s nose. “Tyllae promises to watch Tyllae’s temper from now on, yep, yep, yep!” Sunny fingered the lock she’d been looking at before running a cautious hoof through her mane, looking smugly pleased with the results. “It really is beautiful!” Ditzy put in rather wistfully. “Tyllae can help! Make do for Ditzy, too! Is jussa little spell. Tyllae can do faster than Tyllae can blinky-blink!” The little Fey fluttered her eyes almost faster than the eye could follow by way of illustration. “It’s all right, Tyllae. The Doctor likes me fine just the way I am.” “Well…” Sunny shook her head slightly, clearly enjoying the bounce and the way each separate curl waved and refused to tangle! “… It’s in me t’ ‘pologize mesel’! Ah ought not t’ve called ye names in first place. ‘Specially a-knowin’ how ye dinna like it.” She coughed delicately into one hoof. “ Ah’ve a wee tendency t’ havin’ a bit o’ a temper from time t’ time as ye may have noticed…” Out of the corner of my eye I saw her roll an eye at me, waiting for a snarky comment. For I was running the Feinberger in a slow figure eight pattern low over Sunny’s abdomen with the utmost concentration using the lowest possible sensor strength with my eyes glued to the tiny display that told the tale of the precious miracle that lay before me… It should have been the most obvious diagnosis, given what the tricorder was showing me, but I ran the scan again and again. Every time the thing showed me the results I started over. I could imagine the Mare In My Head frowning in irritation as she slapped the breaker in my cognitive functions back into position every time it tripped! “… Ah’ll be thankin’ ye t’ no be bouncin’ sensor beams off our wee one.” She said with a hint of irritation. “I’m pregnant no matter how many times ye check…” She paused to fix me with one eye darkly, “Or is it that ye’re a hopin’ ‘tisn’t so?” She made as if to sit up and blanched as a wave of dizziness made her think twice about it! Ditzy was there in an instant, kneeling behind Sunny and letting her rest against her body with her head snuggled in the soft, gray feathers of her wing. “Starry! How could you?” The little Pegasus fixed me with one then, an instant later, both eyes accusingly. “It doesn’t matter who the Father is! Sunny needs your support right now!” I snatched the Feinberger away so quickly that, this time, I did break it! I felt the casing give way in my fingers and I wrapped my fist around it so the loose components wouldn’t fall onto Sunny. Numbly, I poured the remains into the tiny bay that held the complete instrument and closed the tricorder with a snap, breaking that as well. Silently I regarded my hooves, trying to will them to behave as The Mare In My Head became disgusted and jammed a screwdriver into my mental circuit breaker to keep it from tripping yet again! “A baby.” I stated in a small voice. I turned to look at Sunny like she’d just sprouted up from the deck. “You’re… having… a… baby…” The Mare In My Head gave me a quick slide show involving a crib, stacks of diapers, and a montage of cute little button-eyed foals beaming adoringly up at me just to drive the point home. Everything snapped into focus in an instant, my mind shifting from glacial slowness to warp five and to Hell with the inertial compensators! “You’re having a baby!” I said with a degree of maudlin sappiness that would shame the most inveterate soap-opera star! “A baby!” “Put yer sunglasses on, Dearies!” Sunny murmured, snuggling into Ditzy’s wing. “Comprehension dawns!” “Aww! Don’t maka fun of Starry! Starry been very, very, very busy an worried for alla Ponies onna Her-mees an everywhere!” Tyllae scolded, flitting up with the crumpled white paper bag the Doctor gave her clutched to her teeny chest. Luna knows where she keeps things like that but they always seem to be at hoof when she needs them! She plopped the thing down where the low neckline of Sunny’s uniform made a convenient pocket and began rummaging the contents. She came up a pair of bright yellow confections in her hooves. “Open wide, Sunny-Sunny! Number One Medical Assistant Tyllae knows jussa what Sunny needs right now. Candy makes everything better, yep, yep, yep! Trya the lemony ones, Sunny! Tyllae likes those… anna licorice anna cherry anna piney-apple, too!” She flipped the treats into Sunny’s obediently open mouth and busily began arranging an assortment of more to follow, laying out neat little piles sorted by color on her outfit. In just a few seconds her uniform had more color than a Starfleet Admirals! “Mmm!” Sunny munched. “Pineapple, did ye say? Lob a few o’ yon this way! Ah can do wi’ a bit o’ a snack!” Ditzy craned her neck around to look and held a hoof out. “Are there any orange ones? I like those!” “Yep, yep, yep! Lots an lots an lots! Tyllae will get!” The little mite snagged the rim of the bag with her teeth and fanned her wings, tugging backwards until the bag flopped over sideways with its mouth pointing back toward Sunny’s collarbone. Without missing a beat she leapt into the air and did a tight inverted loop whose terminus coincided with the opening of the little sack. Tyllae vanished completely though the bag was barely longer than her tiny self. I missed the performance. Orange candies began piling up on Sunny’s blouse. My mind was otherwise occupied! “But, Sunny!” I blurted out. “How are you having a foal?” “Hark at yon Science Officer!” Sunny dug Ditzy in the ribs with one elbow. “Biology ‘tisn’t her strong suit, innit? Struth! The smarter they get the dafter they become! I shudder t’ think o’ what they’re a-teachin’ colts in school these days! Ours’ll be home-schooled f’sure!” Ditzy looked confused. “… I thought she was the Captain.” “I’m quite well aware of the process, thank-you-very-much.” I said patiently, attempting to squelch the smirk on my Darling’s face. “It’s just that we, um…” The blush rising to my muzzle only egged Sunny on. “…Only, ah, ‘did it’ once. All the way, I mean.” I added hastily. “Full insertion, that is…” I trailed off, too embarrassed to continue and unable to look anypony in the eye just at that moment. …Sunny can be a real sadist at times! “Ye dinna have t’ tell me, Ah was there!” She crowed! “But Ah dinna know ‘bout yon ‘full insertion’!” She turned to address Ditzy, one laughing eye catching mine as she did. “Och! Ye should hae seen it!” She said confidentially to the confused Pegasus. “Big as a bloody cricket bat though maybe no as quite as thick. …Though ye couldna proved it by me at the moment! Ah’m a trooper, t’ be sure, but there was no way Ah could manage morena hoofspan o’ it. Ah still wince thinkin’ o’ yon! Ah made bloody sure Ah was on top ‘r she’d a split me in half when she…” “Sunny!” I hissed. “Oh, fie!” She patted me on the forearm, not even bothering to look my way as she continued. “We’re all girls here these days! Now as Ah was a-sayin’, if Ah had a been payin’ more attention durin’ Physics class back in th’ day Ah would’ve been a wee more conversant wi’ th’ concept o’ action n’ reaction. As ‘twas Ah was just about blown clean off th’ bleedin’ bed n’ across th’ room when she had her…ahem… climactic moment! If Ah didna spread me wings afore Ah got t’ far wall Ah shudder t’ think what would hae happened!” “Damn it!” I protested, trying to look stern. “Now you’re just making stuff up! We get it already! We had unprotected, um…” I swallowed and met her eyes resolutely as I whispered the next word. “Sex once and once is all it takes…” “Well all ye need is one egg n’ one sperm cell t’ do th’ job.” Sunny conceded. “But she was a-loaded fer bloody dragons wi’ a pair like bloody great grapefruits! Must’ve been a gallon in each o’ yon! N’ ye’d no believe how fast they recharged!” She confided to the goggling Ditzy. “Made hell o’ a mess by th’ time t’was all over …Had t’ chuck th’ bedclothes afterwards, no hope o’ savin’ them, ye ken. ‘N we had a mort o’ cleanin’ o’ th’ walls n’ such as well, as Ah recall… N’ never mind th’ time Ah had t’ spend in shower! Lucky Ah got away wi’ me life!” “You’re about two seconds away from the paddling of your life!” I growled as convincingly as I could. “I mean, really now! Taking a private and very personal moment like that and turning it into some sort of… of…” I fumbled for the words, my eyes growing hot and brimming. “…Ribald anecdote! Was it just a joke to you or something? Or don’t my feelings count as long as you can get a laugh at the expense the backwards Equestrin? Excuse me for being raised not to discuss intimate, personal business with complete strangers! Damnit, Sunny! Even if we get past that damned Thing on the Werewolf we still have to figure out how to survive Discord and his slagging Prism! We all could be dead before this is all over. You, me, Tyllae, the Crew, the Federation, everypony and everyone! Including our foal, Sunny! Our. Foal. It’s not a joke, Sunny. None of it is. Grow up…” I paused and caught her eyes. In a softer, yet bitter, voice I continued. “I was going to say, ‘For Luna’s sake’ but what would be the point? They abandoned us. The only reason They’re with us now is that we’re all screwed together and They need our help.” I was hurting and I wanted to pass it on, that’s my only excuse for saying what I did the way I did. Willowbark, Doctor Fisher, or even Sunny could point out any number of cogent psychological reasons for it. Sudden paternity, accumulated stress, the strain of Command, take your pick, throw The Mare In My Head in for good measure and all that you’d end up with in the end still would be just excuses. We’re hard on Equestris, but sometimes we’re brittle… some of us more than others. Everypony has a point from which they have to pull back from and regroup. I’d just reached mine. You see, it’s one thing for a bunch of adults who signed on knowing the danger to risk their lives… or have it risked for them. It was quite another thing to put an unborn life on the line, especially one that I helped bring into being! The abstract concept of the teeming billions of innocent children whose lives hinged on what we did or failed to do didn’t prey on my mind because they were faceless abstracts. It’s horrible to admit but I could handle that. I could accept their risks. But now… A single face kept coming to my minds eye. Its gender was ambiguous, but it was real because it was The One Special Foal that would come into this world or not because of what I did. Could I really accept the responsibilities of billions of strangers, be willing to gamble their existence but be unwilling to chance this one particular one? What made my foal more important than anypony else’s? What made theirs less important? …And how did I come to end up making the decisions for them? It was too much. Just. Too. Much. I couldn’t do it. I didn’t want to do it! In that moment, I refused to do it. I carefully put the tricorder down on the deck, ignoring the tears that fell upon it as I did so. “I…” I choked. “I have to leave.” I stood without feeling it and turned away. I heard paper rustle and could just imagine Tyllae poking her head out of the goody bag. “Starry…?” I heard her say but I was already in motion. In two strides I’d rounded the center console. Ahead of me lay the doorway out of the TARDIS and into the Hermes where decisions would have to be made… I turned right instead and made for the door the Doctor took. Unlike the doors on the Hermes this one was a single panel that pulled away to the right as I approached. I ducked low and passed through, not seeing anything in particular. I just had to move! Sunny didn’t raise her voice but I heard her clearly. “Oh, Starry..”