“And-hic-Big Mac bucks the tree, and it-hic-falls right on top of ‘em! HAH!” Applejack went into a drunken laughing fit. I knew she was drunk, not only because of how much she had asked me for, but just of how she was acting. This pony had definitely had one bourbon too many.
If only she had listened to my warnings.. I shook my head, but laughed just to humor her. I mean, what else could a friend do?
“What a great story, miss,” somepony said, but surprisingly, it wasn’t me. The colt sitting next to the farmer pony had leaned closer to her, apparently listening with a beer in one hoof. “Say, you look like you could use something other than bourbon. How about I buy you something more fancy?”
She snickered in her haze and said, “Sure thing, you nice pony you.” She kept laughing to herself as she spoke.
Apparently, drunk Applejack thinks everything is funny.
“Oi! Bartend! How about a martini for this mare?” He placed his hoof around her shoulder, and she blushed.
I rolled my eyes and started mixing his drink. I wasn’t sure why this pony wanted to take advantage of AJ’s intoxication, unless he was just a pure jerk – which by now was just what I was assuming.
“Here you are, enjoy,” I said, delivering the drink and trying to keep my cool.
“Thanks, mate.” He then leaned in and whispered to me, “Hey, is this filly a friend of yours? Cause she’s really a sucker when she’s drunk.” He started laughing, but then stopped when he saw my stare.
“I’m watching you,” I whispered menacingly, “If you do anything, ANYTHING to hurt this mare, you’re going to get it.”
He leaned back, giving me a mean stare the whole time. He knew I was onto him, but he wasn’t going to give up his easy girl for the night.
“Say, how about we go dance?” he said to AJ with a smirk.
“Sure, ah’d love ta-hic-dance,” she said, stumbling off the bar stool. They went over by the piano and casually danced. Applejack was doing alright for being totally smashed. I heard the door bell ring, only to see yet another usual at the SS – Fluttershy.
Fluttershy never really struck me as the drinking type, mostly because she was so, well, shy. But she loved to come into my bar for a casual drink once in a while. She never really got drunk, but she didn’t stay dry either.
“Good evening, miss,” I said, watching her sit down at the bar, “what can I get you?”
“Oh, um.. How about a cosmopolitan, if it isn’t too much trouble I guess,” she said meekly.
“Don’t worry about it, love, one cosmo comin’ right up.”
As I busted out the vodka, I could see AJ’s dancing had taken a more raunchy turn. It was less casual dancing and more just making a total fool of herself.
“Celestia, look at her. Fallen for some colt under her poor judgement,” I said, looking towards Applejack and shaking my head.
“Oh my! Is that Applejack over there?” Fluttershy said, leaning back from the scene.
“Yeah, unfortunately. She got drunk and then ran off with some weird stallion. Guy’s bad business if you ask me.”
“I could imagine so. I hope he doesn’t take advantage of her.”
“Well, we can only hope.”
I poured the drink from its metal shaker into a glass for Fluttershy. Some alcohol wouldn’t be so bad for me either. I need something to take my mind offa this.
I started pouring myself a pink lady, just when I saw that AJ and the mysterious colt left the dance floor. I scattered my eyes about trying to find them, hoping they hadn’t left. And, what do you know, that’s just what they were doing.
The stallion was guiding Applejack out the door, with her stumbling the whole way. He shot me a devilish grin and went out the door himself, one hoof around AJ.
“Oh no you don’t!” I yelled, grabbing a bottle and jumping over the bar (not to mention scaring the wits out of Fluttershy). I ran for the door and looked outside. He glanced back and saw me, then tried to push AJ to go faster. Lucky for me, she was totally unable to walk in a straight line.
Without thinking, I threw the bottle straight at him. He barely had time to react before it nailed him in the skull. He fell like a rock, totally unconscious.
I ran over and surveyed the scene. Applejack was unharmed and still bobbling around idiotically, the colt however, not so much. He had a few cuts here and there, but otherwise seemed fine, but I just hoped I hadn’t given him brain damage or something. (I mean, the guy’s a jerk, but I have to be respectful at some point.)
I snuck back to the bar with AJ. The normal chatter of the ponies and the piano had subsided, but still, it isn’t every day you see a bartender lash out. I went back behind the counter to see a very confused and frightened Fluttershy staring back at me.
“W-what was that all about?” she said, bringing her head down on the counter.
“It was nothin, don’t worry about a thing.”
“Is Applejack ok?”
“She’s fine, but she ain’t sober. Would you.. mind escorting her home?” I asked with a weak smile.
“Oh, sure. No problem.”
“Thanks, love. Here, have another drink, it’s on the house.”
She sipped the drink and uttered, “Mm, thanks so much. I needed that. I mean, uh.. thank you.”
I smiled at her, watching as she took an interest in the liquor. That pony’s a mystery.
Not even one hour into my shift, and I knew it was going to be a long night.
---
AN: Hey guys. Sorry I'm not busting out chapters very much, and this one's only around 900 words, but I've been sick in bed for the past week, mostly unable to write. I felt bad about not getting my loyal watchers a chapter, so have this little tidbit of chapter 2. Don't consider it a full chapter, it's far too short, but enjoy what little there is.
Oh, and happy Easter. May many eggs fall upon you.
And go Jesus.
-HDJ