//------------------------------// // Chapter 11: Schoolyard Romance // Story: Of Love and Video Games // by Art de Triomphe //------------------------------// After two of the best days, or, I suppose I should say, nights, of my life, Rarity and I returned to Ponyville. Needless to say, Luna was very upset to see me go again, though of course I was quick to assure her that it wouldn't be for long. As soon as I hit the train platform in Ponyville, I was hit with something else. What I assumed would happen happened, and Pinkie proceeded to almost crush me. "Oh my gosh, Jack," the pink pony began speaking in her energetic style, "I'm so happy for you and Luna! You have to tell us absolutely everything!" "Easy, Pinkie," I said, prying the mare off of me, "Rarity can do that for me. I, on the other hand, need to take a nap. I was up all night, after all." "Up all night doing what," asked Rainbow, who was reclining on a nearby cloud. "Not what you think, Dash," I shouted, cupping my hand by my mouth so that I was sure the pegasus heard me. "Oh come on, dude," the pegasus insisted, "you don't have to keep secrets from us." Ignoring the pegasus, I grabbed my suitcase and made my way to Bon Bon's candy shop. When I got there, the little bell that seemed to be a staple of Ponyville businesses rang as I stepped inside. "Hey Jack," greeted Lyra, who was standing behind the counter, "D'you just get back?" "Yep," I replied, patting my suitcase, "I came over here to grab a house key, I need to take a nap." "No problem, let me grab mine and tell Bonny." Lyra slipped into the back room. As I waited, I heard the bell chime behind me. Turning my head to see who it was, I spotted a purple mare with a two-tone mane. "Oh, hello, Cheerilee," I greeted. We had only spoken to each other on two occasions, but we weren't strangers. "Hello, Jack," she replied, then eyed my suitcase, "Taking a trip?" "Just got back from one, actually. A few days in the Crystal Empire, followed by a few days in Canterlot." "My aren't you a busy man." "I like to stay busy." "Oh, I'm glad I caught you," the schoolteacher said with a snap of her fingers, "I meant to ask you something. Would you be against coming to the school and speaking to my class?" I cocked an eyebrow, "You want me to come to the school? Why?" "Well I like exposing my students to as many interesting things as possible," she explained, "You are interesting, being the only one of your species in Equestria and all. I'm sure some of them have seen you around town and are very curious about you." "Well," I began, taking a moment to clean my glasses on my shirt before returning them to their proper place, "I don't see why not." "Excellent," Cheerilee beamed. "But it can't be today," I was quick to mention, "My sleep cycle is a bit off at the moment. I need to go home and sleep." "Not a problem. Today is the weekend anyway. How about tomorrow?" "That would be fine," I said with a slight shoulder shrug, "What time should I be there?" "I'll slot you into schedule right after lunch. How does that sound?" "Sounds good." "Hey Jack," Lyra called, having returned to the counter, "Sorry it took so long, I couldn't remember where I had put them. Oh, hi Cheerilee." "Hello, Lyra," the schoolmare greeted. "No problem, Lyra," I said, stepping up to the counter and grabbing the key, then I turned around and started to leave, "See you tomorrow, Cheerilee." "Remember," she replied, "after lunch." I chuckled a bit, "I'll remember." Once I got back to Bon Bon and Lyra's place, I shuttered all the windows to make it as dark as possible and promptly went to sleep. Suffice is to say, I didn't leave the house the rest of the day. Boring, yes, necessary, you bet. *--*--*--*--* The next day, after lunch, I made my way to the schoolhouse just as Cheerilee requested. When I reached the one-room building, I noticed most of the students sitting outside enjoying their own lunch break. Determined to keep my presence a secret for the time being, I used various trees and bushes to hide my approach. Finally, I was able to slip into the classroom completely undetected. "Jack," Cheerilee greeted from behind her desk, "what are you doing?" "I figured you wanted to keep it a surprise, so I sneaked in." Cheerilee chuckled, "You are an interesting creature, Jack. No offense." "None taken," I replied, sitting on a corner of the teacher's desk and waiting for the fillies and colts to return. Fortunately, I didn't have to wait long, as there was only five minutes left in their lunchtime. As they began filing in again, they all took notice of the non-pony in the room. A few, such as Button and Sweetie, seemed happy to see me. Others, such as the little pink filly in a tiara, seemed to be puzzled as to my appearance. "Class," Cheerilee announced once all her students had taken their seats, "I have brought in a very special speaker. Please welcome the only human in Equestria, and the official Human Ambassador to Canterlot, Mr. Jack Christiansen." Many of the students applauded politely as Cheerilee cleared the floor for me. It was at this moment that I realized I had no idea what I wanted to say. "Good afternoon. It is after noon, right," I joked, pretending to gaze skyward at the sun. A few of the students, notably the three fillies of the Cutie Mark Crusaders, laughed. "Anyway, as your teacher said, my name is Jack Christiansen, and I am indeed the only human in Equestria. Now I know a few of you, and the ones I haven't I'm sure have seen me around from time to time." "Tells us about that fight," a greenish unicorn colt with an orange mane shouted. This caused a bit of a stir from my audience. "Now, now," I said, holding my hands up in front of me, "that was a very dangerous situation. I don't like hearing that any of you witnessed it." "This is Ponyville," the filly in the tiara commented, "Strange things happen here all the time." "Be that as it may," I continued, "I don't wish to be at the center of undue conflict. That fight wouldn't have occured if my friend hadn't been hurt." "Is it true that you are immune to magic," Scootaloo asked. "Yes it is," I replied, "However, it is not a natural thing. I take this special medicine that Zecora made me. You all know Zecora, right?" This question was answered with nods and an assorted "Yeah." "I was having side effects from the event that caused me to come into your world. The medicine cured that problem and had the unintended side effect of making me immune to magic. Not that I'm complaining, of course." "What is your special talent," a silver filly with glasses asked, "Fighting?" "No, no," I shook my head, "I'm not half the fighter some ponies like Rarity or Rainbow Dash are. No, if I have a special talent, I would have to say it's playing video games. The filly in the tiara started laughing. "What so funny?" "Oh, it's just humorous that you entered the world through Button Mash's TV and you two share the same nerdy interests." "What is your name?" "Diamond Tiara." "Well, Diamond Tiara," I made a step toward her desk, "There is nothing wrong with liking video games, or comic books, or anything like that. Different strokes for different folks, right Sweetie Belle?" "Right," the unicorn squeaked. I gazed out of the corner of my eye to see Button with a very confused look on his face. "And do you all want to know who else has an affinity for video games?" "Who, Jack," Button answered my question with a question. "Princess Luna." "Really," Sweetie Belle asked, puzzled. "Yes," I replied, backing away from Diamond's desk, "The very alicorn who raises the Moon every night and the reason there are stars in the sky, spends almost every night sitting in her room, in front of her 98 inch TV, playing games." "Sweet," the green unicorn breathed. "That it is," I agreed, "Now, does any...pony have a question?" A flood of hands shot up. This was going to be fun. *--*--*--*--* The rest of the school day was spent answering various questions. Really, it wasn't much different than what Lyra had asked me previously. Eventually, the school bell rang out, signaling the end of class. Cheerilee made sure all of her students thanked me for my time, and even Diamond Tiara and her friend, whose name I learned was Silver Spoon, seemed genuinely pleasant. As soon as I said goodbye to Cheerilee and stepped outside, I was met by Button. "That was awesome," he said, throwing up a hand for a high-five which I was quick to meet. "Not as awesome as the bit of news I have for you," I replied, trying to keep my smile at a reasonable size. "I have news too. I have decided that today is the day I'm going to ask out Sweetie." "Good for you, Button," I exclaimed, realizing that I might not have to say what Rarity told me after all. "Yeah," he suddenly became a little more solemn, "But I have to get her away from Apple Bloom and Scootaloo first." "Understandable," I replied, glancing over to where the three aforementioned ponies were standing, "Leave it to me." I began to make my way over. Button watched me but didn't follow, which was good because I didn't necessarily want him to. Scootaloo soon spotted me and ran over to meet me halfway, Bloom and Sweetie following behind. "Jack," Scootaloo called, leaping to clear the last few feet between us, "you gotta teach me how to fight." "Fight," I exclaimed, "Oh no, Scoots, no way." "C'mon," she argued, "just a little?" "Ask Rainbow about it," I countered, "She could kick my tail if she wanted to." "'Ey Scootaloo," Apple Bloom interjected, "Why don'tcha come to the farm with me? Ah'm sure if ya ask AJ real nice-like, she might show ya a thing or two." "Hey, yeah," Scootaloo's underdeveloped wings began buzzing in excitement, "Let's go!" I noticed that Scootaloo began walking away from the schoolhouse. "Hey, Scoots," I called, "where's your scooter?" "Oh," she turned around and scratched the back of her neck, "the back wheel popped off. I have to get it fixed." "C'mon Jack," Apple Bloom ordered, grabbing my arm and pulling, "come with us." "What about Sweetie Belle," I turned around to see the unicorn with a confused look on her face. "Oh, Rarity usually comes by and walks her home," Scootaloo replied. I legitimately didn't know if that was the truth or not. I could only shrug my shoulders as I was pulled down the path by both Bloom and Scootaloo. However, once we were out of sight of the schoolhouse, they both stopped and let go. "What's up," I asked, thoroughly confused. "Phew," Bloom said wiping her brow, "thought we'd never get those two alone." "What are you talking about?" "Sweetie and Button. Sweetie won't shut up about 'im. She's even drawn cutesy pictures of the two of them." Scootaloo shuddered at the mental image. "Oh," I rolled my eyes and adjusted my glasses, "is that what this is about?" "Yeah," Bloom replied, "We figure if'n we could just get Sweetie to talk to him without us bein' around, she would open up." I began chuckling, my grin growing to Pinkie Pie proportions. "I think she'll be pleasantly surprised," I said. "What do you mean," Scootaloo questioned. "I mean, Button has to just as bad for Sweetie. That's why I came over in the first place, to try to get you two away so that he could talk to her alone." "So you're sayin' that we both 'ad the same idea," Bloom asked. "Exactly," I replied, "Well done." I stuck out a closed fist, which the other two quickly met in a triple fistbump. "And this time," Bloom stated, "there were no silly love potions." "Love potions?" Bloom smiled big while Scootaloo face-palmed. *--*--*--*--* The rest of the day went by super quick. I actually did end up walking with Scootaloo and Apple Bloom back to Sweet Apple Acres. That turned out to be a mistake, as AJ and Mac were quick to put me to work, not physical labor, mind, but keeping an eye on the two fillies was more tiring in my opinion. Fortunately, the Apple family would never have a friend do something for them without offering something in return. In this case, it meant dinner. After stuffing myself full to bursting with Granny Smith's cooking, I left the farm. However, I didn't head straight back to where Lyra and Bon Bon lived, choosing instead to meander for awhile. My plan was to swing the long way past Fluttershy's cottage before heading back into town. Most of the path between the farm and the cottage is lined by a treeless meadow. On one side, you can see all the way to the edge of the Everfree Forest. On the other, you can see clear to Ponyville. It is probably the quietest, most pristine part of town. But in all of this silence and serentity, I noticed something odd. The moon, which happened to be full, seemed very large, as if it was physically closer to the ground than normal. That in itself I could shrug off as an anomaly. Maybe it was common this time of year, what did I know. In retrospect though, I should have known better. My first clue was that the Moon flashed with a blue glow for a second. I shed my glasses and rubbed the inside of my eyes, sure that I was just tired and that was playing with my vision. However, as soon as I put my glasses back on my nose, another blue light appeared, this one right in front of me. The light soon subsided, revealing Princess Luna. She was outfitted in her crown and heeled shoes as usual. However, the rest of her was covered by a tight black outfit. I worked my eyes from the bottom up, noting first that the dress ended at mid-thigh, leaving those long pony legs completely exposed. As with a certain nightie I had seen her in before, the material of the dress clung to her hips and waist, outlining every curve the alicorn possessed. Her bust was fully covered, leaving me no cleavage to peer at, but it was clung to so tightly that it was almost like she was wearing nothing at all. The dress was attached by a single strap which looped around her neck, leaving her arms exposed and indicating to me that the dress was backless. I was about to open my mouth to say something, but Luna didn't give me the chance. She lept to me, throwing her arms around my neck and her legs on either side of my hips. It happened so suddenly that I didn't catch her properly, resulting in me landing on my back in a bed of flowers. Luna didn't give me a second to catch my breath, planting her muzzle on my mouth in a deep kiss. I would be lying if I said I didn't enjoy it, but I had more pressing concerns, so with all my strength I detached her lips from mine and propped her up by her shoulders. "Luna," I gasped, trying to catch my breath after this whole ordeal, "what are you doing? Somebody is going to see." "Worry not," my princess girlfriend stated, "We have set up an invisibility spell." "Over yourself?" "Yeah, verily," she beamed, "It also affects whomever We want it to, meaning you, Jack." "Well thanks for thinking of me," I replied sarcastically. "But," Luna's look turned from proud to sultry in an instant, "it only remains in effect as long as you are touching me." "Well played, Luna," I complimented, "Guess there's only one thing to do." Quickly, I released my grip on her shoulders and moved my hands behind her, pulling her back down into my grasp. This set off another round of kissing. It wasn't long until I heard a whooshing sound nearby. Fearing there was somebody watching, I broke our liplock and searched around. Sensing my worry, Luna pushed herself all the way up until she was straddling my hips. It was then that I noticed that her wings were fully extended. "Uh, Luna," I pondered, "what's with your wings?" She looked at her feathery appendages slyly before returning her gaze to me. "Tis nothing," she said, bringing herself back down and putting her mouth next to my ear, "Just something that happens when winged ponies get aroused." I could feel my whole body heating up, "Aroused?" "Indeed. But worry not, Jack, We do not expect thou to perform in these conditions. It would be unbecoming of me to force myself upon you. Besides, We always imagined our first time to be in a bed." You know those anime characters that get a bloody nose at the sight of a beautiful woman? Yeah, I felt like one of those guys. "So what do you want to do?" "We missed thee so much," Luna purred, still nuzzling my head, "We want you to return to Canterlot, and never leave." "All in good time, Luna," I nuzzled back, "I promise, once this situation is resolved, I will move into the castle permanently." Luna brought her head up to look me in the eyes, "You promise?" "Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye," I replied, invoking the strongest oath I could think of. "Thou knowest what happens if thou break a Pinkie Promise." "Yes. A pink party pony and a certain Princess of the Moon will be very upset with me." Luna leaned down to kiss me again, but broke it off a lot sooner than I expected, sitting all the way up and looking off into the middle distance. "Somepony is having a nightmare," she announced, "We fear We must leave now, Jack." "If you must," I mused, understanding that that was one of her royal duties. "We will leave you for tonight," Luna declared, still straddling me, "We fear for our ability to fly if We continue to be in this state of arousal." Why did that sound so much sexier in the Old English? "Good evening," I smiled. "Good evening," Luna replied, leaning down to give me another kiss. Then, with a flash of dark blue magic, she was gone. I laid in the flowers awhile longer. To tell you the truth, I was too stiff to move.