Now ah’m a pony of few words. Aint no secret about that. Honestly, ya could figure that out with but a simple glance my way. That don’t mean ah’m shy. Ah just…aint that good with talkin’ with other ponies. Applejack usually handles that, so ah’m free to do my business helpin’ out on the farm. That’s my lot in life and ah’m quite happy about it. Ah’m not at all concerned about findin’ love, or startin’ a family. Ah’ve got plenty of family members already, thank ya very much.
Still, just because ah’m content with my life on the farm, doesn’t mean ah want the same for my siblin’s. While ah didn’t aspire to be a father, an uncle sounded mighty fine to me. ‘Course, with the years comin’ and goin’, ah started to doubt if my little sister, Applejack, would ever find a special somepony. She was too head strong for the datin’ business. ‘Kind of like pa.’
Call me a hypocrite, but ah did go lookin’ for stallions that’d go great with her. Yeah, ah’d complain when she did it with me, silently of course, but this was different. Somepony had to continue the Apple Family line and truth be told, ah’d think Applejack would make a mighty fine mom. ‘Ah’d make for a mighty fine uncle, if ah do say so myself.’
So, whenever Applejack forced me to come to town, ah’d keep my eye out for the right stallion. Needless to say, none of them fit the bill. There were either taken, just not right for her, or Thunderlane. Ah couldn’t help but chew on my straw a little harder at the thought of the Pegasus. ‘Lazy, no good flirt, messin’ with my sister and all.’
Ah was thankful he wasn’t the one courtin’ Applejack. Thunderlane wasn’t a bad pony per-say. He did his job…kind of. When he wasn’t nappin’ or trying to pick up mares. At least ah had to give him one thing. He wasn’t a love ‘em and leave ‘em kind of stallion. Usually, he’d end up with the mare kickin’ him out of her home. ‘For good reason.’
The very few stallions ah did find were too scared to approach Applejack. Mostly ‘cause they were scared she’d buck them into next week. They were right, but it didn’t stop the headache ah was feelin’.
Now, there was somepony finally willin’ to give Applejack a try. It’s just that that ‘pony’ wasn’t really a pony. It was Discord, the same critter that me a mole dog. The memory was pretty fuzzy, but I remember it all the same. It was just my luck that the one critter to tick me off so much, decided to chase after my sister.
Said critter was tottin’ his apples beside me, hummin’ a little tune ah usually hear from miss Fluttershy. It was short and sweet. For some reason, little notes shot out of his horn as he hummed. Ah didn’t know how he did the things he did and ah didn’t want to know.
Ah didn’t hate him, but ah didn’t trust him either. He wasn’t the trustworthy type. There had to be some plot brewin’ inside that skull of his. ‘Or maybe, he really does care for AJ,’ Ah thought to myself.
That was a possibility, but ah doubted it. For one, Discord barely interacted with Applejack before this whole courtin’ nonsense of his. This didn’t sit right with me. Not one bit. Ah was hopin’ this lil’ trip of ours would shed some light on some things.
Suddenly one of Discord’s hands thrust into his face, holdin’ a bit. “Bit for your thoughts?”
Ah couldn’t help but glance over at Discord beside me. Oddly enough, all of his limbs were on his body and he didn’t seem to have noticed what was goin’ on. Lookin’ the other way, ah was surprised to see Discord trailin’ the cart behind him, with the bit in hand.
Ah knew ah shouldn’t have been surprised by the varmint, but ah was. Maybe ah’m just not used to havin’ him around. ‘Not sure if ah want him to stick around.’ Lookin’ back at where Discord was before, ah found the spot empty. ‘Maybe he used one of them fancy illusion spells.’
When ah didn’t speak up, Discord sighed and pulled the bit back to himself. “It’s real, if you’re wondering. See.” He bit into it, bendin’ the coin. Lookin’ surprised, he held it up to his eye, which turned into one of them telescopes to get a better look. Why he did it….Just ‘cause, ah guess. Pullin’ back his eyes, he threw the coin up into the air, which then turned into a golden butterfly. Ignorin’ that, he turned his gaze to me. “No seriously, you’ve been quiet for most of our roadtrip. It’s been dreadfully boring.”
“Eyup,” ah nodded.
Discord huffed. “So that’s how it’s going to be? The old silent treatment? How childish.” He stuck his nose up in the air snootily. “Fine, I won’t speak to you again.”
‘Thank Celestia,’ ah paid her an upward glance. Discord wouldn’t stop talkin’. It’s like he’s afraid to shut his yapper. Ah was gonna enjoy the rest of the trip in si…
“I’m bored,” Discord whined, layin’ his upper half over me while he walked on with his hindlegs. “Entertain me.”
Ah sighed. “Discord, get off of me.”
Discord gasped and quickly got off. “You spoke a complete sentence? You actually said more than one word.” Suddenly, ah could hear some sort of music playin’ and a golden glow surrounded him. Discord looked up to the sky above. “Praise the maker, it’s a miracle.”
Ah snorted in agitation. It wasn’t the first time someone made fun of me bein’ the quiet guy, but it didn’t help him score any points in my book.
“Please, oh giant of apples, speak and loose your words of wisdom,” Discord said, reverently.
“Discord, ya aren’t right in the head.”
Discord just gave me a wide, unnervin’ grin…with a nail stickin’ out of his head. He took a hammer from…somewhere and held it above him. The hammer was red and had my cutie mark, which didn’t sit right with me, especially when he used it to strike the nail.
Ah cringed when he did that. Ah know he’s alright, but still. That just aint right.
“I am the god of chaos,” Discord threw the hammer to the side, which grew into a tree…that grew hammers. “I wouldn’t be good at my job if I was ‘all here’.”
“That’s what ah wanted to talk about.”
“My sanity?” Discord raised an eyebrow. “My dear golly giant, I sincerely doubt you’d survive the talk. The last pony who tried to understand me threw himself into a hydra’s mouth…after tarring and feathering himself.” He shuddered. “And you don’t want to know what happened to the guy before him.”
Puttin’ those…disturbin’ thoughts aside, ah gave him a disapprovin’ stare. “Ya know what ah’m talkin’ about.”
Discord frowned. “You ponies always want to get to the point. Why not beat around the bush for a little bit?” He flashed himself a bush made up of random words and a cane, which he started to beat around as they walked on. “That’s always good for a few laughs.”
“Discord, this isn’t the time for games,” ah grit my teeth, hopin’ to keep my temper in check. ‘Seems like he’s afraid of the issue. Well, no featherin’ coward is gonna play with my sister, no sirree bob.’
Discord sighed and willed the items away. “Suit yourself.”
Ya know, ah don’t rightly know how ah knew the critter did somethin’ to me, but ah had the urge to look down. Ah was wearin’ one of them fancy penguin suits miss Rarity makes for stallions. A nametag with the words ‘Mister NoFun’ sat squarely on my chest. Ah looked back to the jokester to find him stiflin’ a laugh.
“Very funny,” ah said without a trace of humor. “But ah’m bein’ serious. Applejack aint no laughin’ manner.”
“Of course she isn’t,” Discord put a paw to his chest. “I would never dream of hurting your beloved sister.”
“Again.”
Discord grit his teeth in frustration. “Yes…again.” He looked off to the side, no doubt glarin’ at the scenery.
Ah couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow. ‘It’s almost like he regrets doin’ that to her.’ Maybe ah was readin’ too much into it, but it did give me some hope that he was bein’ at least somewhat sincere with his intentions. Did that mean ah was gonna go easy on him? ‘Hay no.’
“Look, ah don’t wanna go makin’ us enemies. Ah just want what’s best for Applejack.”
Discord laughed. “I don’t think you’re the one to decide what’s best for her. Dear Applejack doesn’t seem like the pony who let’s others think for her.”
“Eyup,” ah nodded. Applejack was stubborn like that.
“But to put your mind at ease,” Discord sighed. “I do care for her.”
“For how long?”
“Excuse me?”
Ah gave him a steely glare. “For how long will ya care? Ya aren’t the most stable of critters. How do ah know ya won’t get bored and leave her?”
Discord frowned. “I am not the ‘love her and leave her’ type. Dear little Fluttershy can vouch for me.”
“And how do ah know you won’t turn tail and run away with her?” It was no secret that Discord had a soft spot for Fluttershy. Some ponies even thought they were a couple. ‘Course, ah didn’t believe it myself. Ah know a couple when ah see one and they seemed like just good friends…But then again, ah’m not the most sociable of ponies.
Discord rolled his eyes. “Please, if I did that, then what’d I do with this?” He held up a paw that for some reason had a watch around his wrist. Little see through characters of both Discord and Fluttershy danced around each other on the contraption.
“Best friends forever. Best friends forever. Ding.” They sung, before Discord flashed away the watch.
“Friendship is serious business, big apple pony,” Discord said. “I am not one to turn against a force that can literally turn me to stone….That and she makes the best tea. You need to come by and give it a try. I’m sure she’ll love having you over.”
“Ah reckon ah might,” ah chewed on my straw in thought. Discord seemed to be serious about not runnin’ away. Us apples are good at sniffin’ out liars. That and he had a point about stoppin’ by Fluttershy’s house. She seemed like a nice pony and it didn’t hurt to get to know his little sister’s friends better.
“Splendid,” Discord beamed. “Fluttershy deserves all the friends she can get. Maybe then she’ll learn to be a bit more...outgoing.”
“Eyup,” ah nodded. “But ah still wonderin’, Discord. Are ya just doin’ this because an apple hit your head?”
Discord rubbed his chin. “Not really. Your sister is a fun pony to hang around. I find it hilariously easy to get under her skin and she is so cute when she’s grumpy.” Discord chuckled to himself. “Maybe I don’t ‘love her’, but that’s only because I really don’t know what love is.” He frowned. “I want her to show me.”
“So,” ah gave him an inquisitive stare. “Ya want her to show you how to love? Well, that’s gonna be mighty difficult, seein’ how she’s never been in love before.”
Discord’s ears perked up at that. “Really? A mare like her? Why, I’d think there would be lines of stallions just waiting outside their door.”
Ah chuckled. “Maybe from time to time, but they don’t last long.”
Discord gave me a knowin’ grin. “A little brotherly persuasion?”
Ah rolled my shoulders, gettin’ some kinks out of them. “Eyup.”
Discord threw his head back and belted out a hearty laugh and gave me a slap on the back with his tail. “Good show. I bet they still wet their beds in night after your talks.”
“Eyup.” Ah didn’t intend to sounds so smug about it, but ah take my lil’ sisters happiness above everythin’ else.
“By the way,” Discord gave me an appraisin’ look. “I’d like to thank you.”
“For what?”
“Giving me a chance,” Discord’s grin felt much more natural than his usual one. “When I first started this whole venture, I was sure as chaos is random you were going to,” he summoned himself a white, cowpony get up with a straw in his mouth like mine. “Tan this varmints hide.”
Ah rolled my eyes at the fake accent. “‘Course ah am. If Applejack didn’t want ya around, she’d have done somethin’.” Ah felt a lil’ guilty, bein’ so distrustful of him earlier. Ah made a note to give him the benefit of the doubt. He wasn’t all that bad.
“Oh, you don’t consider all the threats and whatnot she’s thrown my way her doing something?”
Ah shook my head. “My sister would’ve hauled your flank off the farm in an instant if she didn’t like you at all. Chaos powers or not. That’s why ah haven’t done it myself.”
“But I annoy the living daylights out of her?” Discord looked confused. “Surely you don’t like me messing with your beloved family.”
“Ah don’t, but ah know you won’t do anythin’ bad to her.”
“You put that much faith in me?” Discord looked at me like ah’d grown a second head….Which ah’m glad that ah didn’t.
“Fluttershy did, so can I.”
________________________________________________________________________________
*Cadance, outside Ponyville’s library*
I did my best to keep my excitement on the downlow. Which is much harder than you think it is. I mean, its been years since I’ve actually just sat down and had a nice cup of tea or something simple with my beloved sister in law. My princess training did nothing to stop my hooves from tapping in anticipation or a goofy smile to cross my muzzle.
‘Keep it together. There’s no reason to get excited. This is just going to be a nice, relaxing visit. No monsters or end of the world scenarios.’
I raised my hoof daintily, like a true princess, and knocked on the door. To my utmost pleasure, it was little Spike who had come to greet me.
“Cadance?” He asked, looking rather surprised to see me. Understandable really. Princess usually don’t just show up on your door unannounced. “What are you doing here?”
I think it’s safe to assume that I adore the littlest dragon. He’s just so adorable, I couldn’t help but squish his cheeks and coo out my words. “I just wanted to pay my favorite dragon a visit.” Releasing my hold, I softly nuzzled his head. “Have you been a good dragon since I’ve been gone?”
“Yes mom,” Spike grumbled, blushing from the attention I was giving him.
I couldn’t help but do so. I mean, I was the one who raised him during his earlier years. Technically, I’m his mother in certain respects. I just adored that prospect to death and had eagerly jumped at the chance years ago to nurture Spike.
“Good,” I lifted my muzzle and walked inside, my wing safely around the young dragon. I gave my surrounding a good and thorough gaze. There wasn’t a single spot of dirt or anything untidy in the rather large, for a small town library, room. I’ve only been inside Twilight’s house once before, so this was a treat.
“Awesome, isn’t it.” Spike grinned and scuffed his flaws against his chest. “I like to keep this place in tip top condition.”
“I sincerely doubt anypony could do better,” I said truthfully. Spike was a master of trades, many of which I taught him myself. It was a shame that Celestia couldn’t really spend some time with him, but that was the cost of being the ruler of Equestria. I just hoped that I had time for my own little ones when I finally had them. “By the way, where’s Twilight?”
“Oh, she’s out of town,” Spike said, making me frown. “Something about a treaty with the Reindeer.”
That got me worried. Reindeer are a warriorious race with several...practices that were simply medieval. While Equestria and the Reindeer had never gone to war against one another, there was certainly a ton of hostility piled up against each other. Most of it unwarranted, but some justified. ‘I just hope they don’t try anything with Twilight there.’
I was also miffed. The one time I could hang out with Twilight, without anything bothering us, she had to go play peacemaker with a bunch of barbarians. I snorted in agitation. ‘The universe hates me.’
“So,” I started. “Twilight left you here...alone?”
Spike nodded. “Yeah, she does it all the time.”
A deep frown etched itself across my face. ‘Twilight! I taught you better than this! He’s a child, for auntie’s sake.’ I was going to have a talk with her about this.
“Don’t worry,” Spike obviously saw my disapproval. “I’m a big dragon. I can take care of myself.”
I giggled and ruffled his spines with a hoof. “Of course you’re a big dragon. Look at how much you’ve grown since I last saw you.” Spike grumbled and tried to swat away my hooves. I just giggled. “Aww, you use to love it when I ruffled your scales.”
“I’m not a baby anymore, mom,” Spike grumbled. He never called me mom out in public, not anymore. It was his way of acting tough and mature, which I found adorable. By ourselves, however, he’d slip up.
‘I miss when he’d call me mommy, but that couldn’t last forever.’
“I know,” I told him. “But us moms like to baby our kids, no matter the age. So, get used to it, buster.”
Spike snorted in agitation and folded his arms. “I don’t wanna.”
I giggled. Spike was without a doubt, the cutest thing ever. Maybe that’s just me being biased, but what the hay, I’ll be biased. “Say, since Twilight’s gone, how about we hang out?”
Spike raised an eyebrow. “Really? Hang out?”
I nodded. “Yeah, we haven’t been able to chat in ages. I want to know what my little dragon is doing these days.”
I could see the sparkle in Spike’s, no, my son’s eyes.
“I have some new comics we can read together," he said.
"I'd like that. I'd like that a lot."
It’s the little things that make the heart warm.