/u/MishDjent
* The Ballad of Fretboard Shred *
Every morning at dawn you could see him arrive
He flew slick and straight and was done before five
Kinda broad at the wingspan and short in the head
And nopony gave guff to that Fretboard Shred
Nopony seemed to know where Shred called home
He just trotted into town with a broken phone
He didn't neigh much, he kinda nodded his head,
And when he spoke at all, it was to say he was "Shred"
Someponys say he came over from Manechester
Where he lost all his bits to the bloody jester
And a mighty blow from his leather boots
Put that Fillydelpy feller under grass and roots
Then came one day at a quarter til nine
Thunder cracked and fillies started cryin'
Farmers were prayin' and hooves beat fast
And everypony else thought they'd breathed their last
Through the flash floods and mudslides of that sudden rain
Flew the leather clad brute through the piercing pain
Grabbin' pony after pony flyin' up to the hill,
By the giant oak tree until the storms were still
And with all of his strength he whilred all around
And a colt yelled out, "What's that terrible sound?"
And a hundred pones stared as the sky became clear
Winds blew back the gales and they all started to cheer
But Fretboard Shred and his crazy-flank name,
Just weren't to be seen and it wasn't the same,
And these few words they etched in to a plaque,
"Watch the skies close in case he comes back,"
"Fretboard Shred"