"Welcome back to...QSA!" Scootaloo said, and for once, she was smiling. Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom, who had both watched every episode, were banging their heads on the wall trying to forget the memory of them being forced to attend the last episode of season 1. And then every episode of season 2.
Scootaloo trotted back and forth in front of the camera, Diamond Tiara following close behind. Having this as the season's last episode made it twice as as long and twice as interesting. There was one problem. Twilight Sparkle was undefeatable, which was the main purpose of the episode: to defeat Princess Twilight Sparkle.
"Today, we will be scheming against the new princess, Twily! Since we double locked the room her friends stupidly locked themselves into, Twilight will have to face us on her own, which will be made even more hard after Sweetie Belle uses her magic to turn us into older ponies." Scootaloo pulled out an amulet from her pouch.
Being a nation wide TV star really helped with locating the alicorn amulet. As Scootaloo put the amulet on Sweetie Belle, Diamond reached into her own pouch and pulled out her own little gift.
"Facepaint?" Apple Bloom questioned. Diamond grinned, before smearing onto Apple Bloom's flank the symbol of Scootaloo, a crazy swirly.
"Cutie mark." Diamond replied, giving Apple Bloom a hug. And then they were almost blasted to pieces.
Sweetie Belle had turned them all into grown mares, with their respective powers. Sweetie Belle's unicorn powers were that of an alicorns, due to the amulet. Scootaloo could actually fly. The other four ponies were much stronger.
Scootaloo flew out the door of the clubhouse, the other 4 trailing her closely. They headed off to the castle, Apple Bloom on her right and Sweetie Belle on her left. Diamond was next to Apple Bloom and Silver next to Sweetie. Using her wings to brush the dust off of her body, Scootaloo somehow looked 20% cooler.
The five friends found their way to the castle, and with Scootaloo in the lead, stormed straight in. Twilight was sitting in a chair, her back turned. As soon as they entered, Twilight turned around.
"I've been expecting you, Scootaloo, Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, Diamond Tiara, Silver Spoon." As soon as Twilight finished speaking, Celestia, Luna and Cadance all flew in next to her. The entire scene looked extremely cliche. The four princesses stood to face the five crazy ponies.
Scootaloo smiled, spreading her wings, prepared for attack. Apple Bloom got ready to buck the princesses, under the control of Sweetie's amulet. Sweetie had already conjured a machete. Even Diamond and Silver were prepared for battle, their hooves filed rather sharp.
"Give up now, Scootaloo." Celestia stated, her own battle sword prepared, a double bladed one at that. Luna was wielding a scythe, Cadance a whip. Twilight simply was aided with her extremely powerful magic which she had used to blast Tirek, Nightmare Moon, Discord, Trixie, and every other villain with.
"Never." The battle started. Scootaloo flew at Twilight, her target. Twilight shot lasers at her, but using her newly found ability to fly, Scootaloo easily dodged them. But then Celestia, Luna and Cadance all blatantly ignored the other 4 ponies and attacked Scootaloo, causing her to fall to the ground.
Scootaloo woke up in the hospital, tired and strangely hungry. Her four minions all were surrounding her, for even though she was a terrible boss and a terrible pony overall, they still kind of liked her. Scootaloo tried to fly. She couldn't. She was once again a little filly, the usual.
The room's door opened again, showing the regal ruler of Equestria, Princess Celestia. The four other ponies bowed slightly before exiting leaving Celestia to talk to Scootaloo.
Scootaloo looked at Celestia, a clear snarl on her face. She turned away.
"We're all crazy in our own way. We just choose to express it differently." As Scootaloo looked up to what was Equestria's closest to a goddess. She saw a little spark in Celestia's eyes, a spark of insanity. It was only there for a second, but it was there.
"You're also insane, Princess." Scootaloo stated, looking intensely at the white coated holy mare. The princess smiled oddly before placing a hoof on Scootaloo's shoulder.
"We all are. I can't act crazy because no pony wants to admit they're crazy except for you and Diamond so far." Celestia replied, stroking Scootaloo's hair in a very motherly way. It both looked and felt awkward for Celestia. She handed Scootaloo a note, before leaving the room.
Scootaloo gasped, reading and then rereading the note.
To Be Continued...
PART II
Previously on QSA
"We all are. I can't act crazy because no pony wants to admit they're crazy except for you and Diamond so far." Celestia replied, stroking Scootaloo's hair in a very motherly way. It both looked and felt awkward for Celestia. She handed Scootaloo a note, before leaving the room.
Scootaloo gasped, reading and then rereading the note.
Scootaloo watched as Sweetie worked on a trailer for the next season. Being crazy really helped when you were scheming against ponies. Giving her final stamp of approval, Scootaloo sat down on a stool in front of the camera, adjusting a blue bowtie she had found lying in Lyra's room...not that she was stealing or anything, just borrowing for approximately ten billion years.
"Lights, Camera, ACTION!" Scootaloo called. "My name is Queen Scootaloo, the main character of Queen Scootaloo's Adventures. Today is the special part of this double length episode! We will be interviewing all the ponies in hiding, and several others today, on an all new segment called...Interviewer Scootaloo!" Scootaloo walked onto a large stage, already covered with a large, homey rug and two sofas.
Scootaloo sat down in one of the sofas, motioning to Apple Bloom to bring out the first interviewed pony.
RAINBOW UNKNOWN MIDDLE NAME DASH
A few claps rang out through the live audience when the rainbow maned pony flew out, more or less being pulled out on a rope. Rainbow growled a little, but still sat down on the red colored sofa. She had been forcefully dressed up in one of Rarity's girlier dresses, and did not look happy covered in pink colored bows, ruffles, lace and puffs.
"Hello, Miss Dash, and welcome back to my show!" Scootaloo said, turning towards her idol. "It's so so so so so so so so so so so nice you could be here!" Scootaloo grinned, letting out a fanfilly squeal that put the crowds before Sapphire Shores' squeals to shame.
"Hello, Scootaloony. Can I go now?" Rainbow said, annoyance and a little fear in her voice. She crossed her hooves, and tried to shake the pink ribbon out of her mane.
Scootaloo answered by simply shaking her head. She handed Rainbow Dash a box of Button's apple juice, which Rainbow downed in ten seconds flat.
"You made that 20% cooler!" Scootaloo whispered, before speaking a little louder, "What do you think of this trailer for Season 2? Or any general Season 2 thoughts?" Scootaloo handed her microphone to Rainbow, who defeatedly decided to play along. Lesson learned, when dealing with a crazy, do what they want.
"Ok. Just one thought. WHY IN EQUESTRIA DO YOU HAVE TO DO THIS TO ME?" Rainbow screamed, breaking the glass of one of the cameras. Scootaloo tapped her ears with her hooves, unable to hear.
"There's several reasons. This TV show is reigning in bits from all over, it went real big in Saddle Arabia and the Land of Griffins." Scootaloo answered, tapping her ears again. She rubbed her hand on her sofa, a velvet one. She pulled out of her large satchel-purse-fanny pack thing one box
Inscribed on it were the words Queen Scootaloo's Adventures, glazed over with a shiny plastic. Underneath, it was written in Griffinish. The picture on the front showed Scootaloo in her usual trenchcoat and fedora. Scootaloo smiled, quickly autographing the DVD before tossing at Rainbow Dash.
Rainbow tossed it out the window, a look of disgust so vile on her face it would make Rarity proud. Scootaloo frowned for a second, before smiling again.
"Next question. You will attend the premiere of Season 2, won't you?" Scootaloo asked, handing Rainbow Dash an invitation, covered in streamers of all kinds.
"No! Let me go!" Rainbow Dash yelled, bucking her captor in the face before flying off to take a nap in a cloud.
"Next guest!" Scootaloo called, as Apple Bloom ran to repair the window Rainbow had broken while she had dashed out, no pun intended.
APPLE JACK APPLE
"Welcome back, Miss Apple Jack Apple!" Scootaloo beamed, welcoming the farm pony to the sofa by pulling on the rope.
"Mah name is Applejack, sugarcube. Not Miss Applejack Apple." Applejack said, obviously annoyed. It was kind of weird, with Scootaloo giving the entire cast middle or last names.
"Potato Tomato!" Scootaloo growled, tossing Applejack an autographed DVD. Applejack, like Rainbow Dash, tossed it out the window, but when she tried to buck Scootaloo, Scootaloo ducked.
Scootaloo gave several tugs on the rope, causing Applejack to be jerked into the being interviewed sofa. Applejack very reluctantly sat down, facing Scootaloo.
"Ok! Question one for Miss Apple. What are you thinking about Season 2?" Scootaloo asked, rubbing the arm of her sofa. Apple Bloom had finished the window, so Scootaloo also admired her reflection.
"What in tarnation are you thinkin, sugar cube? Another season?" Applejack yelled, giving the same vibe as Rainbow Dash. Scootaloo ignored it. She simply tossed her question card at Applejack.
"Ok. Next question. You'll be going to the premiere of season 2. Or else." Applejack gulped, as Scootaloo's eyes narrowed. She bobbed her head up and down, and even though she was crossing her hooves behind her back, Scootaloo didn't really care.
"Ok! Now, tell us, how do you like the dress we prepared for you, Applejack? Or should I say...Apple Jewel?" Scootaloo giggled, pointing at Applejack's dress.
Applejack was wearing a blue princess gown, one that looked like it came out of Rarity's book of fairytales. In fact, it was Cinder-Rarity's dress. What Applejack would give to be wearing R-Apple-Punzel's dress. Her hair was out of its usual ponytail, and her hat had been confiscated.
"Ah really hate y'all." Applejack muttered. She grabbed the rope and started chewing it. Scootaloo didn't bother to restrain the orange earth pony. She simply watched as Applejack eventually chewed through the entire rope.
"Ok. You may go. We need to fly through all this, because of a very special...thing at the end." Scootaloo said, shoving Applejack out the door towards a very annoyed Rainbow Dash.
"Next we have..."
Pinkamena Diane Pie
"Hello, Miss Pinkamena Diane Pie." Scootaloo smiled, looking at a depressed Pinkie Pie. The had straightened her curls with a larger than life straightening iron and put her in a very brown dress. Pinkie snarled at Scootaloo before willingly sitting down on the leather sofa.
"Well, Miss Pie, please do explain your choice of dress!" Scootaloo said excitedly, brushing against the fabric. It was scratchy, very very scratchy.
"Maud liked it. In fact, she hired the pony who made it for me. I like Rarity's better. May I leave?" Pinkie sighed. Her hair was annoying, and useless. Scootaloo frowned. Pinkamena was supposed to raise the viewers, but instead, the deadbeat pony was lowering them.
"Ok. Somepony take Pinkamena off the set!" Scootaloo yelled, tossing Pinkie a DVD. Pinkie was then escorted off stage, making her segment the shortest.
Flutter Posy Shy
A yellow pegasus was pulled on stage, her face shielded by her wings. She seemed to be muttering something, and there were birds in her mane. She ascended the stage, a look of eeriness on her face, being the only one who cared enough to watch her friends' interviews.
As she already knew the questions Scootaloo would ask, Fluttershy calmly sat down in the leather sofa, prepared for the worst. She invited Scootaloo to sit back down on her sofa, prepared to let the interview commence.
"Hello, Flutter Posy Shy!" Scootaloo beamed, a fake interviewer smile plastered across her otherwise disshelved face. For one thing, where Rainbow Dash had bucked her, there was a hoofprint on her eye. And she was covered in dirt, from all the commotion Applejack had caused.
"Hello, Scootaloo. The answer is I will not be able to attend the premiere. And no, I do not want a EEEEK!" Fluttershy gave a loud shriek as Scootaloo tossed her a DVD. It collided with Fluttershy's head, causing her to drop onto her couch.
"Only 10 bits!" Scootaloo smirked, dusting her hooves. "Now, I'm very sorry, but since the amazing Rainbow Dash and her sidekick, Applejack, took too much time, we will be skipping Rarity. We'll have to prepare something extra special for her in the premiere! And as for Pinkie and Flutters, since they didn't get enough screen time...I have a special surprise they will be participating in...right now!"
Scootaloo tugged on a rope, dropping a large cage into the center of the stage, tugging both Pinkie and Fluttershy out from their secret backstage hideout.
In the cage was none other than fan favorite, princess of Ponyville, Twilight Sparkle.
"We will continue after the break!"
Twilight Alicorn Sparkle
"My middle name is not 'Alicorn'." Twilight stated, noting the slight inaccuracy with the show.
"Whatever, Miss Sparkle. We are here today to discuss something important, so please refrain yourself from being annoying." Scootaloo snarled, patting the princess on the head.
"A little surprise here...we will be kicking off next season soon...starting with Episode One: The Kidnapping of Twilight Sparkle. Now, Miss Pie and Miss Shy, please do carry Miss Sparkle out to my steakout van. Silver Spoon, get my trenchcoat. And we'll see you all next season!" Scootaloo cackled, grabbed the princess' cage and bolted out the window.
To Be Continued...