//------------------------------// // That’s not your conscience talking, that’s your ego, // Story: Keeping your Promises // by RaylanKrios //------------------------------// The rest of the school day passed without incident. Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon ate lunch on the opposite side of the playground from the Crusaders, and even the relative freedom of arts and crafts time didn’t afford Diamond an opportunity to take any of her usual potshots at the crusading trio, since the warring tribes were situated on opposite sides of the room. Scootaloo was happily heading homeward after treating herself to an afternoon milkshake from Sugarcube Corner. Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle were helping Rarity with some fashion thing, but though Sweetie Belle had explained it in more detail, all Scootaloo heard after “dresses” was a lot of white noise. As much as Scootaloo loved being with her friends, she was more than willing to skip that particular adventure. Her wings were buzzing as they propelled her scooter in the direction of her home, when her front wheel abruptly stopped spinning, its motion inhibited by an unseen trip wire. Her scooter followed suit, but she kept going, her momentum carrying her up over her handlebars. Scootaloo hit the ground hard, face first, only her helmet saving her from serious injury. Scootaloo tried to stand up, but quickly noticed a weight pressing against her back. She tried to twist to see what it was, but found that her head was being held in the dirt, and no amount of thrashing could dislodge whatever was keeping her pinned. Without warning she felt the pressure on her back ease up, but before she could stand, Scootaloo was overwhelmed with the sensation of a sticky viscous substance covering her entire body. It reminded her of the many times she and the crusaders had been covered in tree sap, only this liquid flowed a little more freely. Scootaloo opened her eyes in an attempt to figure out what was happening, only to see a white mass of feathers flying toward her. They landed everywhere, held against her body by the sticky syrup, with some getting in her mouth. “Hey, Chickenloo looks even more like a chicken now!” a familiar voice said in its usual scornful mocking tone. “Haha, yeah she does,” called a second, also familiar, also mocking voice. Disoriented and frightened, Scootaloo spit out the awful taste of feathers and tried to run away, but the combination of syrup and feathers left her unable to get any traction, and she ended up tripping over her own forelegs, hitting the ground face first again with a resounding thump. The adrenaline temporarily blocked out any pain from the fall and she immediately started to get up again until she felt a sharp blow land squarely between her wings. The strike itself was not all that strong, but the sensation of being alone and frightened while somepony hit her was enough to shatter the mental barriers she had put up that separated her conscious thoughts from her memories of being abused. Acting on pure instinct, she curled up into a ball in an attempt to hide behind her tail as she whimpered, her forelegs shielding her face. She felt a sharp kick to the ribs which elicited a frightened yelp and a louder whimper while she began shaking uncontrollably. Unable to come up with a different course of action, she cried out, “Please stop,” begging with a pitiful wail, not really expecting her plea to have any effect, seeing as how it hadn’t ever before. Her eyes clenched tight, she didn’t see Diamond Tiara rear back for another punch, but she also didn’t see Silver Spoon grab her friend’s foreleg. “Diamond, stop; look at her! Just… you made your point okay? Let’s just go.” Diamond glared at her friend as though she might hit her too, but that look passed as quickly as it arrived. It was quickly replaced by her usual haughty contempt and directed back toward Scootaloo. “Never touch me again! Got it, blank flank?” she spat at the still trembling mess of syrup and feathers at her hooves. As a final act, adding insult to injury, Diamond Tiara picked up the fallen scooter by its handle bars, reared up on her hind legs, and, ignoring a protest from Silver Spoon, swung the toy as hard as she could toward the nearest tree. Scootaloo lay on the ground, unable to stop trembling, with her eyes still squeezed tightly shut. She didn’t see her prized possession collide with the oak tree but she could hear the telltale sharp crack of what could only be her baseboard splitting in two as it was ripped from the handlebars. She then heard the dull thud of Diamond Tiara hitting her handlebars against the thick trunk, followed by the muted clatter of the pink pony dropping them. The last thing she heard was a satisfied sounding huff. She didn’t hear anything, other than the wind blowing through the leaves, and her own ragged breathing, for a while after that. When Scootaloo finally did open her eyes, she could make out the blue remnants of her scooter behind her tear blurred vision. Sniffling and fighting back more tears she slowly picked up the pieces and began to trudge in the direction of the CMC clubhouse. It wasn’t her first choice of refuge, but she didn’t want to walk through town covered in chicken feathers, crying and holding the broken pieces of her scooter; that would invite stares and questions. She reached the clubhouse without running into anypony and let herself in; the clubhouse was devoid of any other inhabitants. Once inside, she set the pieces of her scooter down in the center of the room to be dealt with later, and curled up in the corner, trying to find comfort in the familiar surroundings. Her self-imposed exile quickly turned into a battle within herself; the rational side of her brain fighting the part of her brain that only understood fear. It’s okay. It was just Diamond Tiara playing a stupid joke. You’re safe now. You’re never going to be safe. She hurt you and you couldn’t stop it. Next time will be worse. There isn’t going to be a next time. There will always be a next time! No there won’t. Things are different now. Rainbow Dash will protect me! Don’t you get it? Nopony can protect you! Lighting Strike, Diamond Tiara, it doesn’t matter. There are always going to be monsters waiting for you in the shadows. She wasn’t sure how much time had passed, but a different familiar voice cut through her internal quarrel. “Scootaloo! What happened?” Wracked with fright, Scootaloo could only eke out one word. “Diamond.” It was an unusual scene. From what Apple Bloom could piece together, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon, because Silver did whatever Diamond told her to, had covered Scootaloo in syrup and feathers and then broke her scooter. It was a mean thing to do, sure, but Applebloom couldn’t quite figure out why it resulted in a near catatonic Scootaloo. Their adventures as the Cutie Mark Crusaders resulted in them being covered in all sorts of substances surprisingly often; tree sap, syrup and mud to name a few, and Scootaloo never really had a problem with it. She could understand if Scootaloo was upset that her scooter had been broken, but that should make her mad, not scared; despite this, her friend could barely string together two sentences as she sat curled up in the corner. Unsure of exactly how to deal with the situation playing itself out in the clubhouse, Apple Bloom began to focus on the pieces of the scooter; she couldn’t fix her friend but she could at least try to fix that. The three ponies settled into a somber rhythm. Sweetie Belle helped Scootaloo pick her coat clean, while Apple Bloom set to work on trying to repair the damaged scooter. Both processes were slow going; every few feathers Sweetie Belle would give her friend a reassuring hug or gentle pat on the back, trying to hide her own pain at seeing her friend so distressed, and Apple Bloom was having a hard time figuring out exactly how, or even if it was possible, to repair the damage, but both activities gave the three friends something to focus on other than the negative thoughts swirling around in the ether. The fragile tranquility was soon broken by a soft knock. The trio looked over their shoulders to see a sorrowful looking Silver Spoon standing in their doorway. Applebloom wheeled around to face the timid intruder. “What the hay are you doin’ here?” she snapped. Silver Spoon spoke softly. “I came to say I’m sorry. It wasn’t supposed to go like that.” Apple Bloom glared daggers at the filly standing in front of her. Scootaloo stayed curled up in the corner, with her back turned, unable to face her assailant, as Sweetie Belle alternately hugged her friend and tried to pick the last of the white feathers out of her orange coat. “So ya knew what she was planning ta do?” Apple Bloom said through gritted teeth, the fact that she herself didn’t know exactly what had happened was immaterial for the moment. “Not really, like I said-” “Did yah try an’ stop her?” “I told her-” “Did you tell anypony else what she was goin’ ta do so maybe they coulda stopped her?” Silver Spoon shook her head sadly. “Then get out ‘fore Ah kick your teeth in. And you tell DT the next time Ah see her, me and her are gonna have ourselves a reckoning. The only reason Ah’m letting you walk out of here is you’re just a stooge,” Apple Bloom snarled. She still didn’t know exactly what had happened but she did know that Diamond Tiara was responsible, and that was enough for her nemesis to earn a spot on her reckoning list. Silver Spoon started to say something else, but a harsh glare from Apple Bloom told her that she would have to wait to plead her case further. Before she left she reached into her saddle bags and pulled out a small bag of bits. “I think there’s enough in here to buy a new scooter,” she said quietly, leaving the bits by the door. Apple Bloom picked up the bag and set in on the table, unsure of whether to accept the seemingly apologetic gift. The trio was about to resume their previous activities when they were again interrupted, this time by Apple Bloom’s older sister. “Hey girls, I thought I saw Silver-what the hay happened?” Applejack exclaimed, surprised by both the mess and cowering filly she saw in the clubhouse. “Ah don’t really know, but I know Diamond Tiara had something ta do with it,” Apple Bloom said, unable to mask her anger. Applejack shook her head. “That does it. I’m headin’ over to the rich estate and Filthy and I are gonna settle this feud y’all have been having like adults.” Apple Bloom looked back toward her friend, cowering in the corner, and then up at her sister, and placed a hoof on her back leg to stop her from leaving .“Umm, sis, it’s not that I don’t think you should do that, but I think you better go find Rainbow Dash first...” Applejack looked over at Scootaloo and then studied her own little sister carefully; the concern in her eyes told Applejack everything she needed to know. “Well look at you bein’ all level headed and what not. Yeah, I’ll go find Dash. You girls stay here,” she said with a faintly prideful smile. Applejack sprinted into town for no other reason than that’s where ponies tended to congregate, and therefore the odds that one of them would have seen Rainbow were comparatively higher there than say out by the Everfree Forest. Luckily for Applejack, she didn’t have to question anypony because as she galloped into the town square she spotted the telltale prismatic mane of the pony she was looking for. “Hey RD, I don’t know what happened, but it seems like Diamond Tiara did some kinda number on Scoots. She’s at the clubhouse and you might wanna get to her. She seems pretty shaken up,” Applejack gasped out between breaths. As Rainbow Dash processed what Applejack was telling her, only one thought kept repeating itself: Diamond Tiara hurt Scootaloo. Somepony had dared to attack the one thing Rainbow had sworn to protect. The only possible response was to respond with extreme prejudice. “When I get my hoofs on that little-” she growled involuntarily. “What are ya gonna do, Dash? You gonna hit a filly?” Applejack interrupted before Rainbow could finish her thought process. “Damn straight I am.” “Gotta say, Dash, I figured you’d have some mighty strong feelings against foal abuse.” “Don’t you dare say that to me! This is different and you know it.” “Aw hay Dash, it’s kinda not.” Applejack softened her glare, lest she ended up inadvertently challenging her competitive friend. “Believe me, Ah get it. Somepony hurt your little sister, and now you’re fixin to get some payback, but you can’t go an’ punch this particular problem. DT would go cryin’ to her Dad, and you’d end up in jail. By the way, don’t the Wonderbolts have a few things to say about ponies with a record joinin’ their ranks?” “So you want me to sit and do nothing? Nuh uh, sorry, ain’t gonna happen,” Rainbow Dash said, shaking her head. “Ah’m not sayin’ do nothing. Right now, you got a scared filly in her clubhouse that could really use her big sister. Go get Scoots, and tomorrow, when you’ve calmed down a bit, you and I will head over to Filthy’s and handle this like adults, cause consarnit that’s the right thing to do.” “Damn it AJ, I promised I’d protect her! If nothing else I should be able to do that.” Applejack took her ever present Stetson off and held it between her hoofs so she could better look her friend in the eye. “That’s not your conscience talking, sugarcube. That’s your ego.” Rainbow looked at her friend. It seemed as though the hard won lines on her face were slightly more prominent than usual. Rainbow sighed; she didn’t have a monopoly on tragedy. AJ had lost her parents, was largely responsible for taking care of her family and woke up every day with that weight squarely on her shoulders. Despite that, or maybe because of it, she was the most level headed pony Rainbow knew. When she talked, ponies tended to listen, and it had nothing to do with her accent. “She’s at the clubhouse?” Applejack nodded. “Go on. Ah’ll catch up with ya,” A few minutes of top speed flight later, Rainbow gently poked her head through the doorway of the clubhouse. “Scoots?” At the sound of Rainbow’s voice, Scootaloo sprinted toward her, desperate for the security she knew could only be found behind the cyan wings. She leaped into Rainbow Dash’s forelegs and made herself as small as possible; pressing herself as close as she physically could to Rainbow’s chest. Sweetie Belle had done a good job picking the feathers out of her coat, but she still felt sticky, her fur matted down by the residue of whatever syrup Diamond Tiara had used. Rainbow Dash ignored the unpleasant tactile sensation of the viscous liquid on her coat and focused instead on the pony she was holding. Scootaloo felt so fragile curled up in her forelegs, cradled against her chest. It all seemed cosmically unjust. You couldn’t fly faster than light, you couldn’t cheat death and you shouldn’t be allowed to hurt Scootaloo. Not in the sense that it was a bad idea or should be against the law; no, it should be physically impossible, Rainbow thought. Whatever cruel forces governed the workings of the universe should conspire to keep Scootaloo safe, and yet they didn’t, as evidenced by the gummy, slightly trembling, orange ball of fur she was holding. Rainbow didn’t say anything for a few seconds, letting her presence sooth the scared filly. “Are you hurt?” she asked gently. Looking down, she could see Scootaloo shake her head slowly, and she let out a relieved sigh. “Is she going to be okay?” piped the shrill voice of Sweetie Belle as both her and Apple Bloom looked up expectantly. “She’ll be fine. Do you know what happened?” “No, we came here to drop some stuff off and found her like this. She’s barely said a word.” “It’s okay, you girls did good. I’m gonna take her home, and you can see her tomorrow. Cool?” *** Rainbow opened the door and let Scootaloo climb off her back. Rainbow Dash tried to study the filly in front of her. Her coat was still stained with blotches of dried syrup, but other than that it didn’t appear as though she had sustained any serious injuries. Far more troubling was the look on her face. It was a look of resignation, as though Scootaloo believed that her present safety was only temporary, and the knowledge that she was forever doomed to repeat her cycle of fear had taken the spark out of her eyes. At that moment, Rainbow would have done anything to see just a trace of the light she was used to reading on Scootaloo’s face, but she had no idea how to get it back. “How ya doin’ kid?” “I’m all sticky,” Scootaloo said quietly. Rainbow couldn’t help but smile a little. If Scootaloo was worried about being sticky, then maybe the old Scootaloo was in there somewhere. “Shower’s where you left it,” she offered. Scootaloo shrugged and slowly trudged in the direction of the shower. A few minutes later, Rainbow heard the familiar pitter-patter of water hitting the ground. A part of her wanted to stand outside the door, the belief that if she was physically closer to Scootaloo then she could help her more effectively, but as Rainbow heard the shower run she was reminded that her own coat was more than a bit of a mess. She quickly flew upstairs and had her own shower, in a rush to finish so that she could be there to comfort Scootaloo as soon as physically possible. Scootaloo came out of the shower, her mane still damp, but her coat restored to its usual luster. She saw Rainbow on the couch and hurried over to her. She wordlessly sat down next to her, but inside felt comforted by the familiar presence. “Want to talk about what happened?” Rainbow asked. “I was riding my scooter and Diamond must have been waiting for me. Why does she have to be so mean, Rainbow? It’s not like I ever really did anything to her.” “I know, kid. Twilight would say that it’s because her Mom walked out on her and her Dad, and so she’s probably lashing out because of some psychological mumbo jumbo. Applejack would probably say that it’s because her Dad spoils her, so she thinks she’s better than everyone. Fluttershy would tell you that she just needs a hug. Me? I think that some ponies are just born jerks.” Scootaloo sniffled loudly, “There was a moment back in the forest, when I didn’t know what was happening…I thought maybe he escaped and found me.” There was no need for Scootaloo to clarify who she meant. “That could never happen,” Rainbow said softly. “How can you be so sure?” Rainbow could have lied, and at that moment she desperately wanted to lie, but that desire forced her to confront the real reason she hadn’t told Scootaloo the whole truth about what happened the night Lightning Strike broke in. The fact that she hadn’t told Scootaloo what happened had nothing to do with the idea that Scootaloo wouldn’t understand what had happened, and everything to do with the idea that she would. And that understanding the terrible thing Rainbow had done, regardless of why she did it, would cause Scootaloo to be afraid of her. Faced with that possibility, and Rainbow knew that Scootaloo being scared of her would be the worst possible thing for both of them, Rainbow could have said that Celestia turned Lightning Strike to stone as a punishment like she had done with Discord, or that he was locked away in a vault somewhere in the mountains. She could have even said that he was executed, which was sort of true; whatever lie she told, Scootaloo would believe it, but Rainbow couldn’t lie to her sister, and as a result she found the confession spilling out of her. “I killed him, Scoots. He hurt you, and then he broke in, and he was going to hurt you again… there’s a lot of things I can forgive, but that just isn’t one of them.” Scootaloo flinched as she listened to Rainbow’s admission that she had committed murder. “You…?” Rainbow tried to study the filly’s face, desperate for any clues that would let her know how she was feeling, but all she got was blank stare. “I would never hurt you, kid. You have to know that.” Scootaloo sat there for an eternity, her eyes darting back and forth as she stared at the ground, her wings giving the occasional twitch as she processed the new information. “Good,” she finally said quietly. Her voice grew louder. “I’m glad. I don’t care if it makes me a bad pony. He’s dead, and I’m glad and I wish that I could have done it myself.” The rest of Scootaloos catharsis was lost in a mix of gibberish and tears as she broke down sobbing. “He hurt me,” she squeaked out, burying her face in Rainbow’s chest. Rainbow wrapped a wing around her sister and stroked the soft purple mane as she let Scootaloo cry her tears out. “I know, kid,” she whispered softly. It took more than a few minutes for Scootaloo to let the waves of pent up anguish and fear wash over her, crashing against her again and again until she could feel their effects start to ebb. Rainbow showed patience that she probably wouldn’t have afforded any other pony, except perhaps Fluttershy, as she continued to stroke Scootaloo’s mane until she could feel the filly’s breathing slow. Scootaloo wiped at her eyes with a hoof. “I know you would never hurt me. If you were going to, you could have done it. It’d be easy for you,” she said, looking away from Rainbow Dash, but not budging an inch from her spot, nestled close to her big sister. “What are you talking about Scoots?” “The first time he hi-” She let out a small hiccup. “The first time he hit me, I didn’t want to believe it happened. But then it happened again, so I became scared... all the time. Every room I walked into, I’d think of how I would escape if I had to. I could jump out the window of school and head toward the forest, dart through the kitchen of Sugarcube corner…well, you get the idea. It was like a reflex. Every room, I wondered how would I escape if he came through the front door?” Rainbow sat in rapt attention, unable to say anything as Scootaloo continued. “So, umm... your house doesn’t really have any exits I could use. It’s probably too high of a jump off the second floor, and you need a key for the back door even from the inside. There’s tank’s pet door, but it’s small enough that I don’t really think I could fit through it. I’m not strong enough to bust through the cloud walls, and even if I could, I’d still be trapped on top of a cloud fifteen feet off the ground. You could fly down faster than I could use the cloud ladder. Rainbow found herself holding back a tear. “Scoots, I-” Scootaloo looked up, catching her sister’s eye, “You would never hurt me.” Rainbow gripped Scootaloo in a fierce hug, with both of her wings folding around Scootaloo’s back, so that the filly was entirely enveloped in the embrace. She only eased her grip when she felt her squeeze back. Unable to come up with anything to say, she kept Scootaloo shielded from the outside world save for a small tuft of purple mane that peered out from above her wing. “Thank you,” Scootaloo whispered from her haven. The fact that she had lost count of the number of times she wished she could better express herself did nothing to deter her sincerity. The emotional weight of the evening began to take its toll, and Rainbow suddenly found herself a kind of exhausted she had rarely ever felt. “We should get some sleep, kid,” Rainbow said, giving Scootaloo a gentle nuzzle across her face. “I’m brave enough to sleep by myself,” Scootaloo said, as much for her own conformation as Rainbow’s. “I know you are, but I’m not. I… you’re my little pony, Scoots. I’m going to be up every hour making sure you’re okay. I’d like to not have to get out of bed to do it.” The faintest hint of a smile crossed Scootaloo’s lips, and for the briefest moment Rainbow saw the light in Scootaloo’s eyes turn back on. “Only because you asked nicely.” Rainbow cracked a faint smile back and the pair shared another hug, tenderer this time, as Rainbow felt a great weight being removed from her conscience. For her, the hug was confirmation that Scootaloo still loved her, unquestioningly and uncritically. Knowing what Rainbow had done didn’t change that. For Scootaloo, the hug was all the proof she needed to know that it didn’t matter how many monsters were waiting in the shadows. She had her very own cyan guardian to keep them at bay.