//------------------------------// // September 2 – 9:25 AM // Story: Flash Fog // by Kwakerjak //------------------------------// The walk from Ponyville’s train station to its library ordinarily took about ten minutes—though it could easily take as much as fifteen minutes on busy market days, during special events, or when the town was under attack from some manner of eldritch abomination. However, Pencil Pusher was in no particular hurry to arrive at his destination, at least not until he had a natural-sounding conversation topic to present to Fluttershy. He managed to come up with several vague ideas, but shot them all down just as quickly: he had no clue if Fluttershy followed the local sports team (or, for that matter, if Ponyville even had a local sports team), and “How about that weather?” was just plain awkward, given the situation. This issue would be much less vexing if he had any clue how he could actually be of help now that his connections at the DOW were no longer relevant... Pencil Pusher nearly slapped his forehead when he realized that the obvious solution had been staring him right in the face. Without further ado, he trotted over to the library, opened the door, and walked inside. Fluttershy was conversing with two of her friends—Rarity and Twilight Sparkle, though at the moment, he couldn’t remember which was the purple unicorn and which was the white one, though he did remember that the latter of the two had gladly offered to support his pursuit of Fluttershy. Speaking of whom, Fluttershy was now wearing a silver fog suit of her own, although at the moment its cowl was hanging loosely around her neck, allowing her pink mane to flow freely. Oddly enough, she’d decided to wear her burgundy cravat and collar on top of this, but he supposed it didn’t look too bad, although Rarity (he was now feeling a bit more certain that that was the white unicorn’s name) seemed less than pleased with this decision.  “Oh, Pencil Pusher! You’re back,” Fluttershy said as he closed the door behind him, giving him a warm smile. “Is there any news from Cloudsdale?” “Uh, none that I’m aware of,” Pencil Pusher said. “Luna gave the impression that she’d talk to you herself.” “Oh, she did,” Fluttershy said with a nod. “So, um, what brings you here, then?” “Oh, I just wanted to know if there was anything I could do to help you out. I’d like to see this thing through to the end.” “Really? Well, I’m sure there’s something you can do.” Fluttershy’s face was unusually hard to read. It was certainly optimistic, but it wasn’t the same kind of optimism that she had shown when she’d finally accepted that her tax problems were nonexistent. That time, there had been definite relief in Fluttershy’s demeanor, but this time, there seemed to be a vague edgy feeling that Pencil Pusher couldn’t quite identify. Then again, he had just entered the library rather suddenly, so perhaps she was still in the process of switching her attention from one thing to another. “Let’s see... maybe you can help out Rainbow Dash and the weather team. After all, you do work with the department.” Twilight Sparkle nodded. “That sounds like a really good idea to me.” “Impossible!” Rarity abruptly shouted, startling the other three ponies in the room. When the awkward silence that came after this outburst refused to fade, the unicorn followed up by trying to restore some normalcy. “I... I mean, Mr. Pusher can’t assist the weather team, can he? Shouldn’t those crosswinds be taken care of by now?” “Even if they haven’t, the doctor who cleared me to return here after my injury told me to avoid unnecessary flying for at least a day,” Pencil Pusher added. “I suppose you have a point there,” Fluttershy conceded. “Well, perhaps you can stay here with Twilight and help her analyze the data Rainbow Dash will be bringing back from the fog.” “Oh, but I... I’m not sure that’s a good idea,” Rarity replied, her eyes darting back and forth as if she was desperately trying come up with some sort of inspiration. Pencil Pusher had seen a similar expression on Greg’s face a few times, usually when the paunchy pegasus was trying to justify something to his boss. Pencil Pusher wasn’t entirely sure what was going on, but he had a hunch it had something to do with setting him up on a date with Fluttershy, if only because Rarity had seemed so keen on playing matchmaker the previous day. “I’m not sure I’d be of much help to Twilight,” he said. “Unless you need some sort of cost-benefit analysis, I’m out of my league when it comes to number-crunching.” The relief on Rarity’s face was unmistakable; on seeing this Fluttershy briefly exchanged a bemused glance with Twilight Sparkle before offering another suggestion. “Well, I guess you could see if Pinkie Pie could use some help with the party. With all those foals in one place, I’m sure she can use some more supervision.” Admittedly, this would not have been Pencil Pusher’s preference if he’d been given a choice in the matter. It wasn’t that he didn’t like foals, but being around them reminded him of his own foalhood, and his memories of himself as a colt tended to make his grown-up self want to smash his head against the nearest wall, because he had been excessively precocious and obnoxious in his youth. But, on the other hoof, this would give him a chance to show that he could be a mature, responsible authority figure around foals, which would hardly be a negative if it turned out that Fluttershy had motherhood in the back of her mind when selecting a special somepony. “That sounds alright, Fluttershy,” he said with as much confidence as he could muster. “Just tell me where to go, and I’ll pitch in.” September 2 – 9:53 AM Ostensibly, Rainbow Dash and Thunderlane were supposed to be checking the partially solidified band of fog at the top of the Unicorn Ridge for weaknesses that could be exploited in case the north winds weren’t enough to push the fog over the mountains on their own, but they’d already found about a dozen spots where a well-placed buck could conceivably crumble part of the unintentional wall. Of course, anypony who delivered such a buck couldn’t be wearing a fog suit at the time, which in turn meant that there was a serious risk of getting caught in the resulting fogslide unprotected, but that didn’t bother Rainbow Dash too much. After all, the most likely candidate to undertake such an emergency measure (herself) also happened to be the fastest pegasus in the history of, like, ever. No, Rainbow Dash and her second-in-command were, at that moment, discussing a topic that weighed far more heavily on her mind: her misadventures in matchmaking. “So, uh, Thunderlane... mind if I ask you a favor?” The black stallion stared suspiciously at his boss from beneath the silver cowl of his fog suit. “No, I am not going to use my vacation time to camp out in line for Wonderbolts tickets for you.” “That was just a half day, and I’ve only ever asked you to do something like that once!” “What about the time that Rich’s Barnyard Bargains got their hooves on those signed limited edition Spitfire figurines?” “Okay, twice. But this is something completely different!” Thunderlane sighed. “Fine... what is it?” “The next time we stop by the library so Rarity can work on our fog suits, would it be okay if I flirted with you for a bit?” Thunderlane’s face screwed up in utter confusion. “Excuse me?” “I know it’s kind of out of the blue, but Fluttershy’s sort of gotten the wrong impression that I’m interested in somepony who’s interested in her, so I need her to see that I’m obviously not that interested.” Once Thunderlane had worked out what his supervisor was trying to say, he answered her with the most prudent and sensible response he could think of: “Have you completely lost your mind?!” “Oh, come on, it’s not like I’m asking you to do a Sonic Rainboom. You’d just have to play along for a bit.” “Uh, boss, were you not paying attention when the Department sent that mare here to give the mandatory talk about harassment policies?” “But it’s not really harassment if I have your permission, right?” Thunderlane paused. “I don’t know... I can’t really remember all the details of that presentation.” “Look, the Department’s harassment policies only go into effect if the pony being harassed files a complaint, but you won’t have to file a complaint, because I’m already telling you that I’m faking it, right?” “Maybe... but even assuming that Fluttershy doesn’t see right through you and figure out that you’re only pretending to have a romantic interest in me, aren’t you worried about how bad you’re going to look as a result?” “What are you talking about?” Rainbow Dash asked. “I’m currently in a relationship,” Thunderlane replied as he rolled his eyes, giving the distinct impression that he thought he was stating the obvious. Rainbow’s expression remained neutral, but her tone of voice suggested numb shock. “You are?” “Yes, and I really doubt that openly flirting with a stallion whose special somepony is in the hospital with a horrifically dislocated hoof will improve anypony’s opinion of you.” “Hold up,” Rainbow Dash said, her surprise now clearly evident on her face. “There’s another pony in there with a dislocated hoof? Well, at least Flitter will have somepony to talk to, right?” “Flitter is my special somepony.” “No way,” Rainbow said as she broke into a smile. “When did you two become an item?” “We’ve been dating for more than a year now. Did you seriously not know about this?” Rainbow Dash looked completely bewildered. “Uhh...” Thunderlane continued, “Heck, you even told us off for focusing on each other instead of our jobs when our relationship started.” “Oh yeah, I guess I did... but I was just joking about you two being together at the time.” Thunderlane sighed as he pressed a hoof against his forehead. “Look, boss, if you really need somepony to flirt with, why don’t you try that desk jockey from Cloudsdale who keeps showing up around town?” Because that would make the situation worse, Rainbow Dash didn’t say. Instead, she dropped the subject completely: “You know what? Never mind. I’ve got other things to worry about.” September 2 – 10:06 AM “Thank you for letting me help out, Ms. Pie.” “Oh, there’s no need to be so formal,” Pinkie Pie said as she lead Pencil Pusher through the candy shop’s storeroom to the bunker. “I actually prefer ‘Pinkie.’” The huge door was wide open now, and many adult ponies were already bustling around the subterranean vault, putting the finishing touches on Pinkie’s perfect party plan. As the two walked into the main room, Pinkie scanned the area, looking for a task appropriate for the new volunteer. “Let’s see... ooh, I know! You’ve been doing a lot of stuff with the fog, and the fog is basically building materials, so you should be in charge of the bounce house!” “What?!” Pencil said, his voice becoming panicky more from his complete inability to follow Pinkie Pie’s logic than from any concerns he might have had. Leaving aside the fact that he didn’t actually have that much experience with industrial clouds, he doubted he was qualified for this sort of task. Okay, sure, it certainly looked springy and colorful and exciting, and he could easily imagine the foals shrieking gleefully as they bounded about the pseudo-building, but surely there was somepony else with more appropriate skills to handle that particular bit of equipment. “I... I really don’t think the experience translates...” “Of course it does! When you really think about it, a bounce house is basically the same thing as a cloud house, only it’s drier, and wrapped in a cloth.” However, when Pencil Pusher really thought about it, he concluded that the only thing bounce houses had in common with cloud houses was that both were shaped like buildings. “Um, are you sure about this, Ms. Pinkie?” Pinkie Pie giggled. “I already told you, it’s just ‘Pinkie’ to my friends, and I haven’t met a pony who wasn’t a friend yet. Anyway, running a bounce house is simple. All you need to do is make sure that there aren’t too many foals in there at once, and to make sure that the whole place is cleared out every ten minutes so other ponies can have a turn. Oh, and you also need to make sure nopony’s getting hurt. Oh! And you might have to break up a fight if some of the foals start arguing. Oh! And you need to make sure the air compressor is running properly. If the bounce house starts to deflate, it gets less bouncy, and that can lead to nasty boo-boos. But other than that, it’s a piece of cake!” “Uh... right,” Pencil Pusher said uncertainly. Well, look on the bright side, he thought to himself. At least she’s being cheerful and pleasant when she’s dumping responsibilities on top of you, which is more than you can say about Greg. “Well?” Pinkie Pie said with an expectant look in her eye. “Oh, uh, yes, this will be fine,” Pencil Pusher said as he forced himself away from his interior monologue. “I’ll be happy to run the bounce house.” “Well, of course you will,” Pinkie Pie said, as if she had never seriously considered the possibility that anypony might refuse her offer. “It’s a bounce house, after all.” “Ah, I see,” Pencil replied as he shifted his weight awkwardly. “So... is there something else you wanted to say?” Pinkie Pie had a definite twinkle in her eye as she said, “The party doesn’t start for at least a half-hour. Don’t you want to give it a test run before the foals get here?” “Oh, well, you see, to be perfectly honest... yeah, I do.”