Discord the draconequus stared at the bush in front of him, as he had done for what felt like the past millennium.
Seven hundred thousand-five hundred and eighty seven, seven hundred thousand five hundred and eighty eight... He slowly counted the leaves in the hedge again and again, just to pass the time.
He began to ponder the meaning of life. Wait, a second, that’s wrong. He was lord of Chaos, harbinger of anarchy. He didn't think about anything except how to wreak more havoc upon those boring ponies.
Unfortunately for him, he wasn't in any position to do anything of the sort. He was once the sole ruler of Equestria, god of everything in existence. The laws of nature and physics simply bent and melted in any manner he wished. Reality would tear, replacing all order with pure, excellent chaos.
Now he was but a statue in Canterlot's sculpture garden, once again. He found it strange. Anypony with common sense would put him somewhere safer, instead of on display as a stone statue. It's how he escaped the first time.
One would think Celestia would learn from her mistakes. All he needed to do now was wait, and plan. He wasn't some simple-minded pony. He was Discord, malevolent ruler of pandemonium. Maybe a bickering couple, or another trio of conflicting friends could set him free again. Any disruption of peace and harmony between the ponies in his immediate vicinity would only add to his power, until he stored enough energy to finally escape.
Everything was so much better when he was loose. It was all going chaotically, just how he liked it, until those annoying ponies showed up and froze him in stone. How though, could those six mares have defeated him? Did his chaos turn against him, somehow empowering them, allowing their friendship to break his curse? There was no way. Well, then again, he was Discord. Nothing made sense, and that's what made everything so fun.
There's so much more to be enjoyed in life when everything is unexpected; it keeps it exciting. Disarray, chaos, havoc, and turmoil made ponies happy, those ungrateful ponies. He was the one who created them. He had been the one who sculpted the earth ponies out of mud, the pegasi from the clouds. He was the one who imbued the unicorns with his own magic, bringing life to the barren wasteland he had found. He was creator of all pony kind and had ruled in magnificent chaos, until his two masterpieces betrayed him.
That's how it all started. He had created them opposite each other, light and dark, sun and moon. He made their power equal his. All he wanted was to see them fight, and bring even more chaos to the insane world. But somehow they had banded together, with what they called "Harmony". They stood together in unity, and struck him down. They called him evil, saying that he made life miserable for ponies.
It was his world; in his eyes he could do with it what he wished. How could they ignore how dreadfully boring order was? Always knowing what's coming, following directions, letting someone else tell you how to live? There was no fun or excitement in that. You would live in a rut, your entire life predetermined. Bah, he couldn't see how anyone could live like that. All he wanted was to show everypony how fun life was when it was chaotic! The pink pony, she had loved his chocolate rain. When the sky smells of fudge, who can't help but smile? When nothing made sense, and everything mixed together in the most wonderfully chaotic of ways; that was when life was at it's greatest.
He had been a good ruler when he was free. He had brought joy into everypony's lives, only seeking to entertain. Admittedly, it had been his own entertainment that he had sought, even if it came at somepony else’s expense. But he had snapped them out of their mundane routines, shifting them into his world of joyous disarray. If only he could do it again. He wouldn't make the same mistakes, and all of Equestria would know his eternal chaos. And they would enjoy it. His downfall came from his overconfidence. He allowed that one purple unicorn to keep her sanity, and somehow she had managed to unite the wielders of the elements of harmony, and bring an end to his age of chaos. That wouldn't happen again, oh no no no.
He would take the elements of harmony and shatter them into dust; why let the one thing capable of defeating him remain? Those six mares, they would know absolute chaos. The quality of friendship would be unheard of. Hatred would grow and tear them apart. There would be no way to retrieve their minds, and never will they know unity or harmony. Celestia and Luna were still dangerous though. How could his creations defy him so easily? Understandably, they were agents of discord. It was what he had originally created them for. It was in their nature to do the surprising and unexpected. Never though, did he think that it would mean they would unify and encase him in stone.
He was Discord, the all-powerful spirit of disorder. These ponies were merely toys he had created, made for the sole purpose of his amusement. They were not capable of destroying his beautiful turmoil. They had all been brainwashed by Celestia, made to think they have to think and behave a certain way, live a certain way, make friends, keep everything orderly and without chaos. Did they not realize that true joy could only be found in his pandemonium, when you never know what's happening, or why? You shouldn’t do things for a reason, to please somepony else. You should do it because you can, because you want to. Trivial things like the laws of physics, reality, or gravity can’t get in your way. When all is bedlam, havoc and mayhem, there is no reason for anything. Everything exists to make things exciting, to entertain.
He didn’t know how nopony could realize it, or why everypony hated his rule. He wasn't a bad guy. All he wanted to do was restore the world to its former glory, to bring Equestria into the discord he had originally created, and restore the world he knew. There was nothing wrong in that. He created it; he could do with it what he pleased. And once he got out of that statue, he swore to himself he would. This time nothing would get in his way.
Satisfied with his musings, Discord stared back into the bushes. “Drat," he thought to himself. "I lost count." Sighing, he resumed. "One, two, three, four, five..."