//------------------------------// // Mischievous Luna // Story: The Married Life // by Legacy55 //------------------------------// A bright light flashed throughout the dark hallway of Canterlot Castle. An eerie silence hung in the air, and the torches along the walls cast a creepy glow on portions of the hall. Using the upmost caution, Discord crept down the deserted hallway. His footsteps were cushioned by the expensive, ornate carpet beneath him. After a few minutes of carefully sneaking down the hall, he turned to the right and placed a talon on the golden doorknob to his bedroom. Slowly, he turned it until he heard the click, then he slithered through the gap. Discord let out a quiet sigh, “…And Celestia’s none the wiser…” “Going somewhere?” The lights flickered on, revealing Celestia standing in front of their bed with a scowl on her face. “C-C-Celestia?!” “Surprised to see me? Thought that I’d be asleep, eh? Well, you aren’t the sneakiest of ponies, you know… I bet half of the castle heard you creeping down the hall…” “Well, I was just… uh…” Discord’s voice trailed off; for once he was at a loss for words. “It’s two a.m. Discord…” “Well, I was out drinking with my friends, just like I told you!” He quickly mumbled, trying his best to return to his cool new attitude. “By drinking, do you mean sipping chocolate milk with Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash?” She asked with a smirk. “Wh-what?! N-no! Hard liquor, that’s what all the cool kids drink these days. You wouldn’t know of course, what with you being so old and stuck up.” Celestia’s stare turned as cold as ice, and Discord tried to weaken with the tension with an awkward laugh. “You’re sleeping on the couch tonight…” “What?! I am not sleeping on the couch! I’m a prince! Therefore I deserve much more than a crummy-” “Couch. Now.” Discord let out a defeated sigh and turned to leave. If there was one thing he learned in his three months of marriage with Celestia, it was to not argue with her when she was mad. And boy, when all the senators and common folk weren’t around, she could really flip. ---------------------------- Dear, Twilight Sparkle I’ve just finished planning the dinner this weekend and I’m eager to see you and all your friends! I recently received your letter, and I’m glad that you aren’t upset about the baby. As you know, Discord isn’t taking this easily. Speaking of which, I certainly hope he straightens himself out before the dinner… Anyway, I ask you not to tell your friends about the baby as I’d like to personally tell them all this weekend. Until then! Sincerely, Princess Celestia Upon finishing the letter, Twilight placed it down on her desk and raised an eyebrow at the stunned Spike. “Princess Celestia’s having a baby?!” He blurted out, his jaw hanging low. “Oh, I guess I forgot to tell you!” Twilight said rather casually. “Oh yeah, because the Princess having a baby is just such a regular thing that it must have slipped your mind…” Spike shook his head and went back to sorting the books in his claws. “Well, sorry Spike! Discord’s been coming around here and annoying me constantly, so it’s hard to even think straight! Speaking of him, have you seen what he’s wearing? I think he’s been hanging around Dash for a bit too long…” “You know, I think Pinkie mentioned something about Rainbow training Discord. Got no clue what that means though.” “Training?” Twilight placed a hoof under her chin and pondered for a moment. “Hmm, I’ll have to ask her about it.” After placing the last of the books on the top shelf, Spike jumped down from the ladder. “So, nopony else knows that the Princess is pregnant?” “Nope. She wants to keep it a secret until the dinner, so don’t tell anypony!” “Right! You can count on me!” Spike saluted in response, and then zipped his mouth shut. Well… That secret is going to be out by the end of today… -------------------- “I’m starting to think I should reschedule the dinner…” Celestia mumbled, making sure to keep a steady pace so she wouldn’t be late for her next meeting. “…And why is that?” Luna asked, taking her eyes off of the gorgeous paintings that lined the castle walls. “Isn’t it obvious? Discord and his whole mid life crisis… He’s going to make me look like a fool!” “It’s just Twilight Sparkle and her friends, so I wouldn’t be worried. I, for one, am very excited for the dinner. It’s going to be hilarious watching him make an idiot of himself!” Celestia sighed as she stopped in front of the door to the meeting room. “Well, I’m glad you’re having fun, Luna! Because I’m not, and with the way Discord’s acting I’m going to be looking after this child all by myself…” “Don’t be ridiculous, sister! Discord isn’t that irresponsible…” Luna thought for a moment before letting out a chuckle. “Well actually, he is!” Celestia glared at her sister before entering the meeting room. She definitely wasn’t looking forward to the two hour report of Equestria’s rainfall that she was going to have to sit through… --------------------- “One! Two! Th- Oh, come on! You can only do two pushups?!” Rainbow Dash roared in frustration as she watched the struggling Draconequus. “Well, I th-think… that’s pretty good!” Discord wheezed, lying on the ground in defeat. “You really are old…” She rolled her eyes at him. “If you can’t do a few simple pushups, how do you expect to become cool?” “I thought I already was cool!” “Ha! You still got a long way to go, maggot! Now let’s see some more pushups!” Discord went back to his pathetic attempts at exercise while Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie stood watching. “You really think you can get him in shape by this weekend Dashie?” “If I can get the weather team to make a tornado, I can whip Discord into shape! Now work those arms, weakling!” Rainbow Dash turned her attention back to the Draconequus, who was just on his third push up. “And… thre-” Before he could raise himself up again, his arms gave out and he collapsed back onto the ground. The pegasus face-hoofed. “It might just take awhile, that’s all…” ----------------------- “Now we move on to Princess Luna. You say there is something important you must notify us about?” A dark blue unicorn asked, looking up from the pile of papers on his desk. Seeing that it was now her turn to speak, she walked to the center of the room and smiled at the stallion. All around her were extremely well dressed unicorns, staring at her with curious eyes. If there was one thing she hated about the Arcana council, it was that they thought they were better than everypony. Even the Princesses. “Thank you. I’m glad I didn’t have to wait as long as usual…” She scowled before moving on. “You see, my sister Princess Celestia is going through some health issues right now, and-” “-And what issues might those be?” The unicorn cut in, a quill busily scribbling beside him. Grinding her teeth, Luna kept herself from lashing out at him. “She’s well… Pregnant…” A dozen quills dropped simultaneously before an eerie silence filled the room. A bewildered-looking unicorn straightened her glasses and spoke up. “E-excuse me?” “Pregnant… She’s only told me and Discord so far, and I’m not sure when she’s going to make it public.” Swallowing loudly, the head unicorn went back to writing. Immediately, the entire room was filled with the scratching of quills on parchment. “Anyway… Because of this, my sister is not supposed to perform magic. Not to mention the strain of raising the sun every morning is setting her off. We’ve talked, and we believe that we’ll give the Arcana Council the honor of raising the sun until she’s better.” The dark blue unicorn smirked. Oh, how Luna wished she could just fire him and the whole dammed council. But according to Celestia, they were “imperative” to the kingdom… “The Arcana Council will gladly take responsibility of raising the sun. Now, if you could please hurry along, Princess; we have important matters to attend to.” He has matters to attend to?! Oh, if only I could throw just one right hook… Holding back her rage, Luna left the council chamber. Then she started to make her way to the castle gardens. What she needed right now was some relaxation time. Fate however seemed to have a different plan for her. As soon as she turned the corner, she was met with the ear piercing sound of Discord’s mechanical contraption. The Draconequus was racing down the hallway, a servant having to leap out of the way to avoid being run over. As he reached the end of the hallway and Luna, he slammed his hoof down on the break. Stepping off of the bike he smirked at his sister in law. “Well, if it isn’t Princess Luna and her fat flank. Where are you headed to? The buffet table?” Of all the things she needed right now, this was the very last thing on her list. She almost took a swing at him, but an idea crossed her mind and she couldn’t help but smile. “You know Discord… you sure look cool…” She stated, stifling back a laugh. “Ha, I don’t need seniors like you telling me I look cool. I know I'm cool after all." Luna was forced to place a hoof on her mouth to keep from bursting out in laughter. Him driving around looking like an idiot was one thing, but actually thinking he was cool while doing it was just icing on the cake. “Oh yeah, because it’s just so cool when old ponies try to act like the new generation… I think your growing some grey hairs there Discord!” “W-what?!” He broke his cool for a second as he ran a claw through his mane. However, he quickly returned to his new attitude. “Oh, real funny Luna… I’ve had enough of hanging out with losers like you. Peace!” He mounted his bike and sped down the hallway, leaving Luna coughing in a cloud of black exhaust. “Oh, you just run, Discord…” Luna said, rubbing her hooves together mischievously. “…Because this weekend, I’m going to make you lose your cool, and I’ll finally have my revenge!” She broke out into an evil laugh, until a passing servant gave her an odd look. She responded with an awkward chuckle, and then hurried down the hall. ------------------------------ “Pinkie, you’ve really out done yourself this time! These eh-clairs are amazing!” Applejack grinned, happily grabbing a few more off of the tray in front of her. “They’re pronounced éclairs, Applejack.” Twilight quickly corrected, also grabbing another for herself. “Ah know, that’s what ah said.” The cowpony replied, her mouth full of chocolate. Pinkie Pie placed the tray down on the table and bounced back over to the counter. “No problem guys! I’m always happy to make treats for my friends!” “Oh, it’s too bad Rarity couldn’t come… She would certainly love these…” Fluttershy said weakly as she nibbled at her food. “Well, she’s still trying to find something to wear to the dinner. I don’t understand what she’s so worked up about, though. It’s just going to be us, the Princess’s and Discord.” Twilight replied, now done eating. She returned to her book. Almost as if on cue, the door to Sugarcube Corner was literally thrown off its hinges and Discord came roaring in, a rainbow colored pegasus flying right behind him. “Yo.” Was all he said as he got off of his bike and walked over to their table. The loud noise of the motorcycle had scared Fluttershy, and she was cowering in fear under the table. Applejack was on the floor laughing, and Twilight was trying to get back to her book. “Hey Discord and Rainbow Dash! Want an éclair?” Pinkie Pie asked, holding up a tray almost as if nothing had just happened. “Is that you, Discord?!” Applejack said in between laughs. “Twilight said you looked ridiculous, but Ah would never imagine somethin’ like this! Bwahaha!” Discord merely glared at Applejack through his glasses for a moment before looking away. Rainbow Dash frowned at her. “What? Discord looks 100% cool, thanks to yours truly of course.” “I-I-Is the monster gone?” Fluttershy squeaked as she poked her head out from under the table. “Oh, there’s no monster, Fluttershy! It’s just Discord!” Pinkie Pie said, carrying a fresh tray of éclairs over to them. “Oh, well he certainly looks um… different?” “Different? He’s the epitome of cool! Well, maybe not quite that cool… But he will be soon! Right Discord?” “Oh yeah.” Discord nodded back. Finally giving up on getting any reading done, Twilight slammed her book shut and placed it on the table. “So, this is what your teaching Discord? How to be cool?” “Yep, and while he’s not the fittest of ponies, he sure is picking it up fast! Just wait and see him at the Princess dinner this weekend!” “Hey RD, what do you say we blow this joint? I’ve had enough of losers laughing at me…” Discord remarked, glaring at Applejack again. “Ugh, alright! We got more training to do anyway!” Discord started up his motorcycle again, causing Fluttershy to take cover under the table again. He flew out of the store with Rainbow Dash following. “Wait… did he just call me the loser?! Hahaha!” Applejack broke out into another fit of laughter. I’m sure the Princess isn’t going to appreciate this. Twilight thought silently to herself, picking her book back up. I just hope that he doesn’t give her some sort of mental breakdown. She’s got enough on her plate as it is…