//------------------------------// // Chapter 7: Official Business // Story: Of Love and Video Games // by Art de Triomphe //------------------------------// Once again, I found myself at Canterlot Castle. Celestia had sent a letter to Twilight requesting my presence on this particular day. She also requested that the others not accompany me, which seemed odd, but nobody was going to question it. Plus, the letter came with one first class ticket, so there was that. So now I was back at the palace, dressed up to the nines, Rarity having made me another suit, this one black with a bright blue shirt and white tie. The guard who met me at the train station led me to the throne room, where Celestia was sitting there, doing what I supposed she always did, signing some sort of official-looking documents. "Ah good," she said upon spotting me, "you've arrived, and right on time as well." "Well I would hate to keep you waiting, your majesty," I said, still treating her like the royalty she was, though without the bowing. "Come," she walked past me and toward the door, "we have much to discuss." I followed the princess out of the castle and into the royal gardens. After going a ways further, she sat down on a bench, motioning for me to join her, which I did, of course. "So," I began once we were comfortable, "why am I here?" "There are two bits of news I have to share with you. One is positive and one is negative. I will get the bad news out of the way first. Twilight and I have been collaborating to figure out a way to send you back home, and though we will not rule out the possibility of one day doing so, we have yet to come up with anything." I sighed deeply, closing my eyes and hanging my head slightly, "That shouldn't surprise me as much as it does." "I understand. We all understand that you are in a difficult situation, though you have seem to have made the best of it so far. But fear not, we will continue to search for answers." "I was brought into your world somehow," I regained my composure and looked Celestia in the eyes, "There must be some way to send me back." "Correct. At least, that is what we believe. Like I said, we will not rest until all possible avenues are exhausted. But, until then, there is the piece of good news." "I had almost forgotten." Celestia smiled, "You are going to be offered a position, an official position, one that will come with a royal stipend if you accept." "A position? Like, in court?" "Not exactly. Jack Christiansen, I would like to appoint you the Official Human Ambassador to Equestria." "Ambassador? Me?" "Well, it is not like there are many options. You are the only one of your kind in Equestria, after all." "OK, but why?" "I feel that it is important, as a fellow sentient species, to be informed of the various goings-on between pony and non-pony citizens. Plus, I believe you could use some cash flow." I smiled, "You're right about that. What would this position entail?" "Nothing much, really. There is a monthly meeting between the various ambassadors and myself. And, unless there is some kind of crisis, that is pretty much it. Oh, and of course, you are the official voice of the human species in Equestria, which is simple as you are the only one." "So you asked me all the way up here for that?" "Do you not accept?" "Yes I accept, but you could have just put this in your letter." "True. But I thought you would like to meet a fellow ambassador, one who also happens to be coming into town today." "Well, I suppose it wouldn't hurt to meet a peer." "That's the spirit. Come, he should be arriving soon." Celestia and I got up from the bench and headed back into the castle. When we reached the courtyard, I noticed a creature who stood out from the ponies around them. They were easily 6-6, with the blue-furred upper body of a very muscular human, but the legs and hooves of a goat or cow. They also sported a pair of long, white, horns on either side of his head, like a Texas Longhorn. "Ah, Stone Chin," Celestia greeted to this creature, "glad you have arrived safely." The creature turned around, confirming what I had suspected, an honest-to-goodness minotaur. "Greetings, Princess Celestia," he said with a slight nod of his head. "Mr. Jack Christiansen," she said, motioning first to me, then to the Minotaur, "meet Stone Chin, Minotaur Ambassador. Stone Chin, Jack Christiansen, newly-appointed Human Ambassador." "Human Ambassador," the half-man, half-bull snorted, "I've never heard of that species before." "That's because I'm the only one. It's a long story." "Isn't it always?" The doors on the other side of the courtyard opened, revealing Princess Luna, decked out in her full regalia. "Ah, splendid, everypony is here." Luna glided in my direction. When she reached me, she was quick to throw her arms around me in a hug, one I had little choice but to reciprocate. "Good to see you too, Luna," I said, patting her back, being mindful of her wings. Luna broke the hug and walked over to have a word with Celestia. When I shifted my gaze and turned around, I almost walked straight into Stone Chin. "Pardon me," I apologized, looking up into the eyes of the large creature, "Didn't think there was anyone behind me." He moved his right arm in such a way I thought he was going to rest it gently on my shoulder. But instead, he brought it down swiftly, clasping the nerve and muscle between my neck and shoulder. I was still looking into his eyes and saw a familiar green flash. The hold probably only lasted five seconds, but it was longest five seconds of my life. It felt like something was being pulled from my body, but refused to leave. By the time I felt all this, Stone was enveloped in a golden aura which I recognized as Celestia's magic, picked up bodily, and thrown up against the nearest wall. He was quickly surrounded by four guards as I went down to a knee. "Jack," Luna swiftly came to my side, "art thou alright?" "Yeah," I grimaced, rubbing the muscle which had been latched onto, "I'll be fine." Suddenly, a third set of doors, the ones that led to the road leading away from the castle, burst open. On the other side stood another minotaur, in fact, he looked exactly like Stone Chin. He was gasping for breath, his torso littered with various cuts and bruises, some of which were bleeding. "Help," he muttered, dropping to his knees, "Imposter." "Get the doctor," Celestia ordered, which a guard swiftly moved to carry out. All eyes shifted between the two minotaurs. Eventually, Celestia made her way to where the first one was still sitting against the wall, "Show yourself, coward," she barked. A flash of green light illuminated the room. When it dimmed, a minotaur was no longer against the wall. Instead sat a black, shirtless, creature with a long, thin, curved horn. What made him unusual, to me anyway, was that his arms, hands, legs, and feet, or what I could see around the green cargo pants he wore, were riddled with holes, as if his limbs were made of Swiss Cheese. In addition to this, he, I assumed it was a he from the anatomy, seemed very scrawny, like an emaciated human. He wore an expression of absolute smug disgust, as if he didn't care that he was caught red-handed. "To the dungeon with it," Celestia ordered, "until I decide what to do with it." The four guards quickly bound up the new creature's wrists and ankles, opting to carry him away like slain deer. "What was that thing," I asked nobody in particular. "That," Luna answered, "was a changeling." *--*--*--*--* Celestia, Luna, and I gathered in the castle infirmary. The real Stone Chin laid on a bed, most of his cut having been bandaged up, and with an IV drip of pain medication flowing into his veins. "What happened," Celestia asked, dead serious. I wasn't even sure if Stone could communicate in his condition, but I wasn't about to cross Celestia. "I was on the road from the city to the castle," Stone explained, his speech very slow, "I was jumped. At first, I held them off, but eventually, they got the better of me." "Them," Celestia almost-whispered, her eyes growing in size, "as in, more than one?" "You think one starving changeling could beat me? Ha. No, it was three of them, at least, maybe four. They all looked alike, so I couldn't be sure." "Multiple changelings in Canterlot," Celestia's voice began to get shaky, "I must inform Twilight, her friends, and the other nations. Jack, you're going to be in Canterlot for more than a day. This is what I meant by crisis." None of us said anything as Celestia quickly walked away. After being assured that Stone would make a full recovery, Luna and I departed as well. As we walked to nowhere in particular, I must have had the thousand-yard-stare going again, because Luna noticed. "Jack," the princess of the moon began, "thou seem troubled." "I saw it." "Saw what?" "When the changeling grabbed my shoulder, his eyes flashed green." "A natural phenomenon among changelings." "My eyes used to do the same thing, before Zecora's medicine. My vision would flash green and it would hurt something fierce." "Just because they seem similar does not mean they are related." "Zecora swabbed my DNA, she said that according to her methods, I was a changeling. She wanted to kill me. Something is not right here." "It is an odd confluence of coincidences." "Coincidence my ass. And another thing, why would he risk it? Why would he attack me, in full view of you, Celestia, and the guards? He was going to be caught." "Well, like Stone Chin said, it is starving." "Starving? Like he was going to eat me?" "Not eat you. The changelings don't feed on meat or vegetables like us, they feed on love." "Love? So the feeling I felt, like something was being pulled out of me. He was trying to drain me of my love?" "In a manner of speaking, yes." "It didn't work. I'm immune to magic. Well, unless it's you or Celestia. He tried and failed." "We are more curious as to the love in question." "Meaning?" "Changelings are attracted to love like moths to a flame. That's basically what they are, moths. It sensed a great source of food, love, coming from you, and, in it's starving state, decided to feed, even if it meant getting caught. So We are simply wondering what would cause you to have such a large quantity of love, large enough to set off a changeling's baser instincts." "I'm more interested in what Celestia plans to do with him. I assume he can communicate." "Unfortunately, no. A changeling cannot speak in its natural form. Only when it takes on the form of a creature that can vocalize can it produce understandable speech." "Well, Celestia's going to get answers out of him one way or another." *--*--*--*--* It was going to take a few days to get everyone together in Canterlot. In the meantime, Celestia had a prisoner to interrogate. Or at least I thought that was what the gameplan was. Imagine my surprise the day after the changeling's capture when she told me that I would be the one doing the interrogating. "Wouldn't it be safer if you do it," I asked, stunned, "You are the princess, after all." "Yes, but you are something that even I am not. You are immune to magic. You will be able to get past any little tricks that it might play. And don't worry, I will be watching the whole thing." "What do you expect me to say?" "Just get answers. Why it's here, who sent it, how many there are, stuff like that. How you do it is unimportant to me." "You realize that the only experience I have with this stuff is watching cop shows on TV, right?" "We know. It should be entertaining." I followed the princess of the Sun into the dungeon. We stopped in an area where I noticed two doors right next to each other. Entering the first door, we came to an observation room, exactly as it would appear on TV. A two-way mirror was placed on one wall, showing the other room, where the changeling sat, manacled to both the chair and the table. "Go on," Celestia motioned, "myself and the guards will be ready to intervene if need be." "OK," I sighed, "wish me luck." I exited the room again. A guard unlocked the other door and I swiftly stepped through, only to hear it lock behind me. The changeling didn't react to my entrance at first, content to continue to stare a hole through the mirror. It wasn't until I sat down in the chair opposite and came into his direct line of sight that he seemed to even notice me. "Change," I commanded in as an authoritative tone as I could muster. The changeling tilted his head, as if he didn't know what I meant. "You know damn well what I mean," I barked, "I know you can't talk in your current form. So change into something that can." He smirked. A flash of green light illuminated the entire room for a second. When it subsided, I saw, sitting across from me, an exact copy of, well, me. It was a little unnerving to see myself shackled like a prisoner in an interrogation room. "Better," he said in my exact voice. "Impressive," I complimented, "Now we can begin." "You're not going to get anything out of me," he hissed, "I'd rather die for the hive than give you ponies anything." "That's your choice. But if you did that, you wouldn't hear my offer." "What could you possibly offer me?" "I'm willing to make you an offer you can't refuse." "I'm listening." "On the other side of that glass is Princess Celestia herself. If she sees that you cooperate, perhaps she won't blast you into her Sun." "Like I said, I am willing to die for the hive." "What a pity." "What?" "You changelings," I said, slightly bowing my head and adjusting my glasses for emphasis, "you're an interesting species. Able to change form into whatever you want. That could be used in a lot of interesting ways, and yet you choose to use it to wreak havoc. I'll admit, I am curious about your species. And I can tell that you are curious about the creature that sits across from you." "What makes you think that?" "I am full of mystery. You know ponies, minotaurs, zebras, griffons, but I am something you had never seen before yesterday. And, on top of that, your little love-draining trick didn't work on me. That has you curious." "How did you do it?" "How did I do what?" "How did you fight off my magic?" "I'll be glad to tell you. But first, you must answer a question for me." "I'm not that curious. I am not a traitor." "Who would know," at this point I decided to pull out a little trick, "Right now, your buddies, the ones who were with you, are being interrogated in the exact same manner you are." "That's a lie. They wouldn't be caught." "You were, weren't you? The changeling growled at me and leveled his eyes. "You were caught because you're greedy. And I don't blame you. Look at you. I've seen you in your true form. You might die of starvation before Celestia has a chance to execute you. Tell me this, how many of your brothers and sisters in the hive have died in that fashion?" His eyes closed, his muscled flexed, and his breathing became heavy. "Many," he finally answered. "I thought so. I don't want that to continue. I can't stand the extinction of a species, even if one of them attacked me. Now tell me, who controls the hive?" "My mother." "Your mother?" "The queen of the hive." "Whose name is?" "Celestia knows her, ask her." "I'm not asking Celestia, I'm asking you." He sighed again, "Her name is Queen Chrysalis." "And she gave you orders to come to Canterlot?" "Yes." "What was your mission?" "My question first." "Hmm?" "Answer my question first. Why did my magic not work?" I smiled, "Simple. I'm immune to magic." He looked at me with fear in his eyes, "Are all humans like that?" "Yes," I lied, "You all should consider yourselves lucky that I am the only one of my kind around. Now, the answer you owe me." He shut his eyes again, "We were to intercept the minotaur, impersonate him, and spy on the meeting between him and Celestia." "And what were you hoping to learn?" "Anything we could. Any information is useful at this point." "Does Chrysalis plan on attacking Equestria? The changeling was silent. "Answer me, dammit," I slammed my fist on the table. "Chrysalis plans on feeding her children. And if that means attacking Equestria, then so be it." "And you feed on love." "Correct. These ponies, they all have love to spare for one another, there is enough to keep the hive fed for millennia." We were both silent for a minute as I formulated my next set of questions. Then I remembered what I had almost forgotten. "Why attack me?" "Hmm?" "Why did you risk attacking me. You must have known you were going to be caught." "You saw me. No one in the hive has eaten in weeks. It was too much of a temptation." "Is there that much love in me?" He smiled, "You're beginning to be affected by the ponies. Their love and harmony are rubbing off on you. After you hugged Princess Luna, the love emanated off of both of you like pheremones. I figured you'd be an easier target." "Fair enough. I think we're done here." I got out of the chair and started to head for the door, which I could hear unlocking. "Wait," the changeling called, causing me to stop and turn back around, "I wish to see my brothers." "Oh," I said nonchalantly, "that was a lie. We haven't caught them. Yet." The changelings eyes glowed green, reverting him back to his true form. The horn on his head began to glow. Deciding to put an end to this, I took the two steps necessary to close the distance and grasped the horn in my hand, which short-circuted his magic. The threat gone, I pulled his horn, and consequently the rest of his head, back and looked down into his eyes. "Now listen up," I growled, "I bear you no ill will. I do not want to see the eradication of your species. But hear this, if you or anyone else tries to hurt me or my friends, I will not be afraid to use lethal force against you." I released the changeling's horn and stormed out of the room. Upon entering the observation room, I found Celestia absolutely beaming. "Good work, Jack," she said, "Maybe, if we can't get you home, you might consider working for the Canterlot Police." *--*--*--*--* Two days later, everyone had gathered for the summit meeting to discuss the changeling topic. Various creatures from all over Equestria were in attendance. In addition to the three princesses, the other Elements, and myself, there was Stone Chin of the minotaurs, a griffon named Juilius, a zebra named Zanzar, and an Arabian pony named Selik. For the first part, Celestia took control, explaining everything that was already known about the changelings, their home, their feeding habits, and their magic. Thus, I got my crash course in changeling. Next, Twilight briefly recounted the story of the pony's previous encounter with Queen Chrysalis, when she impersonated another princess, named Cadance, leading up to her wedding to Twilight's brother, Shining Armor. Twilight also mentioned that said couple would be on stand-by in their kingdom, the Crystal Empire, just in case. After these speeches, the floor was left open to discussion, which quickly devolved into quarreling amongst the various non-Equestrians, as the war hawkishness of Julius and Stone Chin verbally spared with the peace-preferring Zanzar and Selik. For a while, I was worried I would have to be the swing vote. "Enough of this petty bickering," Celestia said as calmly as possible. To her credit, everybody stopped talking to listen to her, "We know that the changelings are beatable, the Elements proved that the last time. However, I believe you all have overlooked a new weapon in our arsenal." "And what would that be," Julius chirped. "The human, Jack." Everybody in the room turned their attention to me. I pointed to myself in disbelief. "Of course," Twilight piped up, "Jack is the perfect counter to the changelings." "And why is that," Selik questioned. "Because of a medicine that he has been taking compliments of my zebra friend Zecora. Here, show them, Jack." She stood up from her chair and motioned for me to do the same. "Must I give a demonstration," I sighed defeatedly. "It'll prove the point," Twilight rightly pointed out. Not wishing to argue any further, I got up from my chair and stepped away from the table. None of the eyes in the room left me. Twilight, who was already a good distance away given our respective positions at the table, started lighting up her horn. After a few moments, she unleashed a blast of lavendar magic in my direction. Quickly, I crossed my arms in an X shape in front of my face, which easily blocked the blast. Twilight refocused her magic, this time creating an aura around both my arms. For a moment, I was stuck, but then I emphatically separated my arms, throwing them out and away from my body which broke the magical grip. Twilight smiled at the apparent success of the demonstration. So did most of the other occupants of the table. However, there was one who didn't seem impressed. "OK, so he can block magic," Julius scoffed, "But can he block this?" The griffon lept out of his seat and flew toward me. Adjusting in mid air, he landed both of his clawed feet in my chest, which knocked me clear across the room and into a wall, which I promptly slid down in pain. Upon seeing this, Rainbow jumped out of her own chair and pounced on the griffon ambassador, quickly taking him to the ground. Fortunately, Pinkie stopped her before she could do actual damage to the fellow flyer. "Julius," Celestia snapped, "that was well out of line." "Just proving a point of my own," the griffon replied, still down. By this point, Applejack and two guards had helped me to my feet. I was winded, but otherwise not that worse for wear. "The bird of prey is right," I said between labored breaths, "Like I've said before, I'm not a fighter. I may be immune to magic, but if Chrysalis is as dangerous as Twilight described, I would be no match at all. Good day." I walked out of the room and down a hallway aimlessly. Eventually, I reached a balconey, one that faced due west, toward the setting Sun. I leaned against the railing, thinking about what all had transpired over the past few days. Sure, I had interrogated a changeling rather successfully, and it was proven that I could counter their magic with ease, but what had I accomplished? Not much. There were still a few changelings out there, possibly hiding in Canterlot somewhere, ready to strike. I didn't exactly feel like a failure, but I didn't feel like I had achieved anything, either. For a time, I was alone on the balconey, not even a guard in sight. Then, I heard the very quiet footstep of someone who was trying not to disturb me. Figuring it was one of the Elements, I turned around to greet them, only to be met with the blue eyes of Princess Luna. "We are glad we found thou," she said in that particularly classical way she talked, "We have been searching all over." "By 'we', do you mean all of them, or just you?" "To be honest," she gazed down for a split-second before finding her focus again, "We, meaning, I, went in search of you first, but I do believe my sister sent the Elements as well." "You don't need to worry about me, Luna," I said, turning back to face the railing, "I'm fine." "Thou does not seem fine," Luna replied, joining me. "It's been a long week." "Yes, We have heard. If you want our opinion, you have taken all of this rather well." "Don't have much of a choice in the matter." "Don't take the griffon's words too much to heart. A blow like that would have toppled anypony." "I know, but he still has a point. I am not a fighter. Heck, I'm not even good at fighting games," this elicited a chuckle out of Luna, "Seriously, every time we play Street Fighter, you kick my ass." "You know what We think? We think that everypony is good at something, everypony has a role to play. One simply has to find their role and perform it to the best of their abilities." "If that's the case, then what's my role?" "We are not sure. But We know that it is not to be a brutish soldier like Julius. You can only be Jack. You can only be you, nopony else. Play to your strengths and minimize your weaknesses." I sighed again and looked at the Sun as it gradually slipped below the horizon. "I want to go home, Luna." "We know, Jack. We know."