The Boss awoke to something slapping them across the face. They couldn't see that horse-ugh, "pony" doing something like that. She seemed too shy. But then again, they didn't think Dex or Julius would betray them either, so, who knows?
They opened their eyes to see a rabbit standing in front of the bed they were laying on. It was tapping its foot impatiently, a dickhead look on its face.
"What the fuck was that for?" The Boss asked angrily, touching where they were hit with their...hoof.
Oh yeah, that.
"Um...Kinzie? You, you there?" The Boss looked around the room, looking for a means of escape. There was a window, so they supposed if worst came to worst, they could jump out.
The rabbit frowned at them, probably wondering the who this "Kinzie" is.
"My name's not Kinzie, it's Fluttershy." The Boss jumped, flinging the demon off of them, as the pegasus, Jesus, that sounds stupid, from earlier walked in with a tea-tray.
Fluttershy? What a fucking name. Well, it could be something worse, like fucking, Sunset Shimmer or some shit.
"I know your name isn't Kinzie, um...Fluttershy. I, uh, I was talking to, um..."She put a hoof over their mouth and gave them an understanding look.
"I understand the need to talk to imaginary friends."She smiled,"I used to talk to them, too, before I found my animal friends."
You mean other horses? "Um, Kinzie's not an imaginary friend, she's-" She cut them off.
"I understand."She handed them a cup of tea she had just poured, And of course, grasping it with their fingers didn't work, so it spilled straight into their lap.
The Boss winced and grunted, and Fluttershy jumped up and set the tray down,"Oh dear, I'm so sorry, let me go get you a towel!" and she hurried out.
Why did she apologize for me spilling it? Maybe it's a horse custom or something. She came back in with some towels.
"I'm so sorry this happened,"she said, a look of intense worry on her face.
"Woah, woah,woah, Buttercup-" the Boss started getting out of the bed.
"Fluttershy."
They stopped and sighed,"Whatever. It's just some spilled tea! I'm fine." they smiled at her reassuringly.
"Still, it needs to be cleaned up."She handed a towel to them to clean up.
"Thanks, Fluttershy."She started cleaning the bed where it spilled.
She looked up at them as they dried off,"So you're royalty?" They turned towards her.
"Well, I killed an alien leader to get it,"She frowned at them,"but, yeah, I'm an emperor."
She stopped cleaning,"If...if you don't mind me asking, um...why hasn't anypony heard of you?"
And they say "anypony". Any more horse puns? Let me guess, is this place called Equo-Land? Fluttershy looked at the Boss, a serious look on her face.
"You're an emperor from a different land?"They nodded.
She narrowed her eyes,"Have you come to take the last remaining piece of Equestria?"
Well. I was close. "What? No? I came here to try out this."They showed her their hoof,"It's a device that lets me travel across universes,"That sounded stupid as-
"Oh, okay..."She said hesitantly,"I'm just glad you're aren't here to destroy us."
And she believed me. Okay. Trusting, but I have a feeling that she's the only person-shit! I mean, pony in this "Equstrya" to be so kind.
"And I'm not a horse-uh, pony. Well...I'm not supposed to be one." They looked down to their furry body. Why me?
The Boss decided that it was time to stop sitting on the side of the bed, and to take action! They would go outside, and face whatever horse-war Kinzie was talking about!
Then they fell flat on their face.
"Oh my! Are you okay, Emperor...um..." She started lifting them up, flapping her wings for help.
"Just call me the Boss, Shutterfly." They said shakily, legs wobbling. They then proceeded to fall forward, thankfully, however, this time they fell on their knees.
"Can you not walk because your legs are hurting, the Boss?"the Boss looked up at her exasperatedly. I just fucking said I'm not a horse, didn't she hear? Well, she also thinks I talk to imaginary friends, so I doubt she'd believe me on that one.
"No, Flootershy, I'm not hurt, I'm just used to walking on two legs." She giggled, making the Boss turn their head quickly towards her,"What?"
"Nopony walks on two legs!" she forced out between giggles, louder than usual. Though with this chick, that isn't saying much.
"Listen, do you have somebody," Dammit!,"I mean, somepony who could understand what I'm talking about, like a fucking leader or something?"
"What does that word mean?" She notched her head to the right, a confused look on her face.
"Which one?"
"Um...the one that starts with an 'f'." Oh you have got to be kidding me!
"Do ponies not have cussing?" She gasped, then glared at him.
Well that's the scariest thing I've ever seen.
"How dare you use a swear word in front of my animal friends" She yelled quietly,"They're much too innocent to hear such awful things! Right, Angel?" She took the Floppy-eared death machine and hugged him.
From behind her back, innocent ol' Angel flipped the Boss off, a smug-ass grin on his face.
That little- She sat the rabbit down,"Have you learned your lesson about swearing, the Boss?"
"If you take me to whoever's running this shi-" She glared at them,"I mean, yeah! I'll never cuss around your..." Angel slid one of his paw-fingers across his throat threateningly,"'animal friends' again. So, can you take me to your leader?"Take me to your leader? Wow, looks like Zinyak's getting to me.
She nodded, and smiled,"Of course, follow me." And started towards the door, until she heard another crash.
Mother.Fucking.HOOVES!
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Battered and bruised, yet determined, despite having to use Fluttershy as support, the Boss arrived at the front steps of the pony princesses's castle.
Is that supposed to look like a tree? "Um, is this it?" They asked. Fluttershy nodded.
The Boss looked around, up the towering tree, and saw the giant orb protecting them. Fluttershy noticed them looking at it.
"That keeps the gangs out..."She trailed off, a sad look on her face,"Twilight keeps it up with her magic. I-it's practically killing her!"
Her voice started to rise, and her eyes began to moisten,"She won't eat or drink,o-or-"The Boss put their hoof to her mouth.
"I'm here to help Fluttershy." They smiled. What am I getting myself into? B-but, just look at her!
Fluttershy scuffed at the ground in frustration, but only made a cute little puff of dust.
Nobody could turn that sweetness down! Ugh... Jesus, I'm getting soft. "Can we go see Evening now?"
"Twilight."
"Yeah, that." the Boss smiled sheepishly, Fluttershy smirked, and motioned for the Boss to go in.
There was a doorknob. Normally, this would sound normal, but...
Hooves.
"Um, how do I open the door?" The Boss looked at Fluttershy expectantly, she looked at him strangely, and pushed it open. "Oh, um...thanks Fluttershy."
They walked into the dark treestle, and Fluttershy called,"Um...Twilight,"nervously, fearful of disturbing her sick friend.
The Boss just walked in, clopping their hooves as loud as they could,partially because they didn't want anyone to think they were sneaking up on them, and partially because they were more focused on not prat-falling than being quiet. Due to the darkness, they didn't see Spike the dragon, and tripped over him.
"Fuck!" the Boss yelled out in surprise. Spike put a forceful claw over their mouth.
"Shut up!" he whispered angrily," Twilight is concentrating on the spell, ya know? The one that keeps us alive?"
"Sorry, I just didn't expect to trip over a fucking iguana!" they retorted.
Spike glared daggers at the Boss,"What did you just call me?"
They smirked at the dragon,"I called you an iguana."
Spike growled,"What are you even doing here?"
Fluttershy waved at spike shyly,"We're here to see Twilight." The dragon assumed a solemn expression.
"Oh, hey Fluttershy!" he glared at the Boss,"Why does this pony need to see her?"
"They said they're from a different universe."
He raised his eyebrows,"A what now?"
"I came from the planet Earth."The Boss said.
Spike folded his arms and smirked at the Boss,"You gotta try harder than that, pal. The ground isn't a planet or a universe." he turned to leave the two. The Boss rushed in front of him and put their hoof in his face.
"Look."they pointed at the device on their wrist,"This allows me to travel across universes. Believe me now?"
Spike snickered,"Nope." His demeanor darkened as he walked to the front door and held it open, pointing out. "Now if you would be so kind, please leave. Twilight needs to concentrate, and talking to you two would break it, and cost her valuable energy." The Boss tried to say something but Spike interrupted," I know you want to talk to her, but you'll thank me tomorrow morning when you wake up alive." He shut the door behind him quietly, leaving the Boss and Fluttershy out on the steps.
"Great," the Boss said, sarcasm dripping off their words,"That was useful."
Fluttershy sniffed,"I miss Twilight so much." The Boss softened and sat down next to her.
They wrapped their arm around her shoulders kindly and smiled at her,"I know. Listen, I came here for a reason. I came here to kick the asses of some motherfuckers, and you know what? I'm going to." They stood up, a fire in their eyes.
"What do you mean, the Boss?"
"Just Boss, Fluts, just Boss," they pulled her up quickly, and she followed them as they stomped towards the town, spirits high. They looked back at her,"You mentioned gangs taking this place over earlier. We're going to take your home back, Fluttershy. I need some help, though. You have some other friends other than Twilight, right?"
"Oh of course, there's Rarity, Applejack, Pinkie Pie, and Rainbow Dash." She smiled at the thought of her friends.
The Boss smiled at the thought of new recruits," So, which one would you say is the best at fighting?"
She pondered upon this,"Rainbow Dash and Applejack are both very good fighters."
"No one is a better fighter than me!" A raspy voice rang arrogantly.
All of the sudden, a blue flash flew by and landed in front of them.
Rainbow hair? Why do I have a feeling that she's-
"You're new here aren't you? Well, then that means you haven't heard of the awesome Rainbow Dash! I'm the best flyer in all of Ponyville!"
Fluttershy smiled shyly,"I say in all of Equestria."
The Boss smiled at the brash pony,She is exactly what I need for the Saints. This chick is almost a female pony form of Johnny!
Rainbow continued with her self-advertisement,"And someday, I'm gonna join the...nothing." the fell at the thought of what she wanted to join.
"Who do you want to join, Rainbow Dash?" the Boss tilted their head, and Fluttershy waved her hooves, trying to stop them.
"The Wonderbolts."Rainbow said, anger in her eyes,"Those traitors! Princess Celestia trusted them, Cloudsdale trusted them, Equestria trusted them!"she quieted, feelings of betrayal evident by her expression," I trusted them."
Fluttershy hugged Rainbow and nuzzled her, "It's okay Rainbow. They don't deserve somepony as wonderful as you." Rainbow smiled at Fluttershy gratefully.
"Listen, not to interrupt the romantic moment between you two," the Boss said, smirking. The two jumped away from each other and looked away, blushing.
"But I need some recruits for the Saints."
The two of them looked at the Boss curiously. "What are the Saints?" Rainbow asked.
The Boss smiled,"My gang. Listen, I need someone who knows what's going around here to join me, so we can take this place back from the Wonderstrikes, and all the other gangs."
"Wonderbolts,"Rainbow corrected.
The Boss rolled their eyes,"Does it matter? All of the gangs are gonna be nothing more than a memory, so if it's Wonderbolts, Wonderstrikes, Wonderfuckers, it doesn't matter to me, because I'm going to kill every single person, or pony, who swears loyalty to someone other than the Saints."
Rainbow Dash had a motivated look on her face, and she smirked at the Boss,"Where do I sign?"
The Boss hoof-bumped her, and started walking towards the middle of the town."We're going to need more than that, though."
The Boss looked towards a brightly-colored pink pony bouncing around, making jokes. That is one crazy fucking horse. I like it.
They looked back to the two mares,"We need more ponies, because we're not stopping with this little town. We're taking over this entire fucking country."