//------------------------------// // freakin sap! // Story: when slenderman left me in paradise // by Jimbob //------------------------------// [Knight] {Me} “That is a LOT of wolves” I was staring past my fence and into the Everfree, where there was a solid two dozen sets of eyes staring back. “I can’t see them” right Twi didn’t have night vision. “I can and there are lots.” [Yep lots lets kill’em] {Yep kill’em} I pulled out my L96 and took a kneeling position, prone would have been better but then I wouldn’t have been able to get up as quick. “J-Jake! What are you doing!?” “I’m going to shoot the life out of them” “What!? Why!?” I gave her a droll stare. “Well earlier if I recall, I was told how dangerous these Timberwolves were and how I shouldn’t move here because of how dangerous they are, so in a way I’m just solving a problem, with high caliber bullets!” she didn’t realize that this is how most of humanity’s problems are solved. At least I’m making the forest a safer place, not just killing for fun. “But your arm is still hurt!” True, I looked at my left arm I figured I could still use it to prop up my rifle without too much pain. “Meh, I’ll be fine” I began to aim down the sights again. “Jake! They haven’t even tried to hurt us yet!” then I heard a chorus of howls and looked up to see the wolves bounding out of the Everfree towards my house. “Twilight must you tempt the universe?” she wasn’t paying me too much attention as her attention was being held by a large amount of angry wolves. I turned and aim down range towards the leading wolf. *BANG* One *BANG* Two *BANG* Three Some of the wolves were closing in awfully fast; I put my rifle down and pulled out my revolver. I aimed at a wolf and dropped it with a quick headshot. I noticed that a large tree casting a shadow that the wolves were approaching. {Perfect} I let a couple of wolves run by so I could get the majority then dozens of black spikes shot out of the shadow impaling dozens of wolves. [Great that only leaves about five more right in front of us] I holstered my revolver and unsheathed my katana the first wolf that jumped at me was beheading in a flash. The other wolves formed a circle around me and Twilight. I really wish I could use my arm I would just draw my revolver and shot them all, but if I put this sword down for and instance we’re dead. {Wait a sec….. IDEA!} A black hand crept out of my shadow towards my revolver; it quickly grabbed it and aimed at the nearest wolf. *BANG BANG* It missed the first shot but the second one plowed through its head resulting in a spray of tree sap all over the ground. I heard a snarl from behind me and turned to see a wolf jumping at Twilight, I spun on my heel and brought me sword around to catch the wolf in the chest. My sword cut through him like tissue paper, I heard another bang and whimper and turned to see another wolf drop. The last wolf jumped towards me, I jerked my head back saving my throat from being ripped to shreds. The wolf landed on my chest, knocking me over, and went for my jugular. I raised my sword up and intercepted its jaws, but I was losing grip with only one hand on the blade. I heard a sickening crunch and the wolf toppled over on me covering me in sap. I looked at the wolf’s chest and saw the hand I had made earlier sticking out from the other side. {That’s weird; did you tell it to do that?} [Nope I thought it was you] {This could be bad} My shadows using themselves could be potentially deadly, hell they already had been just to a wolf this time, let’s just hope this is a self defense thing only. In other news “AWW sick I’m covered in sap!” I hate sap! It’s sticky and generally unpleasant. “Jake are you ok?” I looked over at Twi who seemed fine, just a little unnerved. “Yeah I’m fine, how about you?” “I’m ok you got the only wolf going for me” I was trying to scrape the sap off with a knife but this sap wasn’t having any of it and refused to get off my clothes. “Good, sorry you saw that” I was now attempting to get my knife unstuck from my shirt. “It’s fine Jake; they would have killed us if you hadn’t defended us” I could tell she was still shaken but I wasn’t going to push it. I had successfully got me knife unstuck but still had a large spot of bright green sap on me. “GET OFF ME SAP!” maybe I should just burn the clothes, that would show the sap whose boss. Twilight just sighed and my shirt was encased in a purple aura, the sap slowly separated from my shirt. “HA that shows you sap!” Twilight just sighed again. I went over to her and picked her up in a hug. “Thanks Twi now let’s get you home.” I put her on my back and sheathed my sword, I considered trying to get my cane out of storage, but I was drained I would be lucky to get Twilight home without incident. “I can walk you know” “So you don’t like being carried?” “I-I didn’t say that” she was blushing I could just tell. “I know, so do you know any uses for Timberwolves bone?” “Well I’ve read that they could be used in certain potions, maybe Zecora would be interested in them.” Cool finally I get too meet Zecora, maybe she’ll have a potion to fix-up my arm, that’d be sweet. We had reached the library and I carried a now sleeping Twilight up to her bed. Spike was sleeping contentedly in his basket so I carefully tip-toed over him and attempted to extract myself from Twilight’s grasp. After several minutes of Indiana Jones style switching I had finally been able to replace my neck with a plush bear I had found. Now just have to hope that there’s no giant boulder that want to make me into a pancake. I stumbled downstairs and collapse onto the couch. {We need to get some furniture} [We’ll ask Twilight tomorrow, after some bastard buys me some muffins because he forgot today] I laughed as I fell asleep.