//------------------------------// // Pаrt 2. Rоbоt Uniсоrn Аttасks... Аnd Wins! // Story: Robot Unicorn Attack // by ap0nym //------------------------------// Chapter 2. Surprise. All the gold in the world won't be enough To buy yourself happiness, All the castles and banks won't be enough To satisfy your passion, Imperturbable Wanderer Who has no fear of hell You are Man without Name, I'm scared near you. You woke up early today And you went out in a big way But immediately all the missile units Declared combat alert. And if comet appears someday You will stop it by your gaze You are Man without Name, I'm happy with you Take me away, take me away To the edge of the earth From the rat race From the rat race And if there is an edge there We jump down from it While we fly We will fly We forget that life All women in the world won't be enough To accept your affection, All arrows and bullets of armies Couldn't hurt you. Unconquered Prisoner Who doesn't look at the guards, You are Man without Name, Nude man without luggage Take me away, take me away To the edge of the earth From the rat race From the rat race And if there is an edge there We jump down from it While we fly We will fly We forget that life Ilya Kormiltsev "Man without Name". Canterlot's Herald: "Aliens in Ponyville! Authorities hide!!! Why does Pony in Black do nothing? Why does Princess Celestia keep silence? What is Princess Luna watching for? Every thing is damned by Discord! In the end why is Rainbow Dash resentful? About these and many other things you will NOT read in this issue. And yet why is Rainbow Dash resentful?" "No, hoof! Well who would have thought that now I have hooves?" This is quite an obvious thought. Nevertheless the silver unicorn spent a very long time plunged into a stupor ("Oh, yes, of course, I have now also a horn!") with a rainbow mane and tail, and now standing near a small lake (No, well, why a lake? Maybe even a lake or a pond... may be a pond? Well, near a large... puddle) with a mixture of curiosity he was busily reflecting as he stood on the footpath leading to the woodland. At last, an exciting experience he was tired as he looked around but it was not unusual to find that everything as always looked the same: the same blue sky again the same forest and the same air, the same water and only a vague suspicion about the fragility of the environmental idyll. "Well, well, now only a little more time to wait and that's all, and that will be quite enough." He waited. Absolutely nothing came. "Well, okay, let's now look at what this body is capable of at least." And with this thought the Unicorn leaned back and stood on his hind legs. The new shell was surprisingly docile and more comfortable standing on his hind legs and he stood as if for him it was a perfectly natural state. "So, here I am. The anthropomorphic features do not end up lost." The unicorn noted with satisfaction. "Well, what else can you do?" As if in answer to his unspoken question the rays of sun from behind a cloud touched him and he immediately felt an extraordinary burst of energy as if to rush headlong from place. And he did it without thinking twice. Fields dreaming in carpeted reverie Beautiful horses in hobbling caress Mane isn't shorn and hoof isn't shod By will and destiny they are married Nikolai Emelin "Carpet Field" This normal sunny day didn't bode anything unusual for the residents of Ponyville (really, can anything extraordinary happen in a town populated by an English-speaking pony? Don't tell my horseshoe!). All going about their business (but there is some vacation work plowing on weekends, and only you know, don't you?) but the old bouncy ponies, good friends gathered together again on their favorite meadow fort the weekly walk. Purple alicorn and the princess in one person (muzzle?) Twilight Sparkle and her owl Owlowiscious (yeah, yeah, even titled persons rarely allow themselves to relax with old friends), pink pony-pastrycook Pinkie Pie and toothless alligator Gummy, orange farmer pony Applejack in her invariable cowboy hat and dog Winona, white unicorn designer Rarity together with cat Opalescence, yellow pegasus... (m, vet?) Fluttershy and rabbit Angel. "And y am I never surprised by the lack of Rainbow Dash?" angrily muttered Applejack. "I suppose she sleeps sluggishly and excessively but still no rear hooves. No wonder that her pet is a turtle!" "Why are you like that, AJ?" Fluttershy asked timidly. "Certainly she had reason to linger." "Fluttershy is right, Applejack." Rarity joined in the conversation. "And you for no reason are talking about Tank so unkindly. Even though I do not know why Rainbow is not now here with us but..." "Oh, and I know, I know." rattled Pinkie Pie suddenly. "She is absent for one simple reason and I still do not understand why you, girls, have not guessed this." "Pinkie Pie!" was seldom upset. "Well, where are your manners? Did you never learn that it is not good to interrupt others? Have patience and wait for your turn." White unicorn continued to complain of pink pony while the culprit untroubled was off somewhere whistling a well-known song. "Wait, and what is that we have to guess?" "Silly, it's so simple: Dashie made a surprise for us!" "What kind of surprise?" asked Twilight Sparkle. "Well, of course, Sonic rainboom!" "O...K... And let me ask you: what made you think so?" asked the fashionista in an insinuating malicious voice. Pinkie Pie giggled and said nothing. Surrounded by her friends, she silently pointed her hoof somewhere up behind. Everypony turned around just in time to be caught unawares by the shock wave from the sound barrier which had just been broken. This in turn surrounded the pony on the ground and made their manes and tails quiver. No one got a load of that bute the truth immediately wailed in the corporate style of drama queen Rarity. All their attention was focused on this point in the sky where they could see the flaming arrow. "Well, and what are all of you here doing without me?" suddenly the voice came close to the ear of Pinkie Pie. It was such a familiar perky boyish voice that she couldn't mistake it for anyone else's. "Oh, hi, Dashie. Nothing special, we just look at you creating Sonic rainboom in the sky for us." This phrase of pink pony had the effect of a bombshell. It seemed to shake every thing out of drowsiness. All other pony lightning unfolded as if afraid that Rainbow Dash would evaporate in the air. But, of course, it didn't happen. Blue pegasus with rainbow mane and tail as if nothing had happened was standing next to Pinkie Pie. Although, "as if nothing had happened" is probably an understatement. Although, Rainbow Dash expressed it mildly a degree of puzzlement was still there As well, as everyone else. "Aaaahhh!" Pinkie Pie's famous cry broke the silence. "Rainbow Dash, you're here! But you can't be here right now because you are flying up in the sky and doing Sonic rainboom. It can only be you there in the sky, because only real Rainbow Dash can break the sound barrier and retain the rainbow ribbon cable. That means that you are not Rainbow Dash! Rainbow Dash, you aren't Rainbow Dash, are you? Then who is Rainbow Dash, Rainbow Dash? If you are not Rainbow Dash, Rainbow Dash, then I am Rainbow Dash! But if I'm Rainbow Dash then who are you?!" Apparently this angry interrogative tirade brought Pegasus to life as she shook her head irritably then picked up the fallen jaw and cried: "Pinkie Pie, don't be a fool! You know perfectly well that I'm... me." "Prove it!!!" Rainbow Dash momentarily taken aback quickly gathered her thoughts and smiled enigmatically: "As you wish, girlfriend of mine! How about I tell everyone else that once on your birthday you would like to exchange all of us for a bucket of turnips, sack of flour, stones and..." "Oh, Dashie, this is really you!" Pinkie Pie hugged Rainbow Dash tightly. All the other ponies but Blue Pegasus laughed at this sight. "There is still one serious question on the agenda: Who is there in the sky now making MY branded iridescent pirouettes? That's what I now going to find out!" Rainbow Dash said this sternly while Pegasus about to jump up behind a rainbow trail as she stopped by the pink pony. "Dashie, no, you can't catch up with him whoever it might be!" "Why not?" "Silly, think about, it is flying faster than the speed of sound. You will only waste your energy and will not be able to keep up." "And how do you know, Pinkie Pie?" "You are so funny silly, Twilie, it"s obvious!" "But what do we do now?" "I'll catch up with him!" pathetically said Pinkie Pie posturing like Superman and thrusting one hoof. "You?!" chorused all ponies. "Yes, it is me." pink pony agreed with them and before anyone could say anything to object, she sped away and disappeared over the hill leaving her friends discouraged and staring in the direction of her piink track. "Say, Dash." Applejack whispered to Pegasus. "You slept late today, didn't you? That was the reason why you didn't walk the pets, wasn't that?" That question was repeated and then Rainbow Dash suddenly agreed: "Yes, of course. And what's wrong?" "Nothing, I very simply wanted to ask..." This new body was... AWESOME! He got up to a gallop along the forest trail and rapidly gained speed. The silver unicorn could not have foreseen that it could move so fast. All sensors were barely able to keep up with accessing the information about potential obstacle in the surrounding area. The information was conveyed only at the last moment. The message about the sudden stump that was in his path came too late. There wasn't enough time so unicorn had decided to just jump over a snag and unexpectedly found himself t a height of several tens of meters above the ground. "Hmm, rocket boosters made my limbs rise... Baby, you're starting to like me more and more! True, it would be nice to think about how am I going to land?" As if hearing his thoughts and thinking of the global law of gravity (damn Newton) the earth began to rise up rapidly to meet the unicorn. Such a warm welcome he was neither pleased nor displeased. Suddenly a moment later realized that with all cylinders boosting he could escape into the sky. "Farewell to land in a good way!" Letting out an enthusiastic neigh unicorn rushed full steam forward and immediately broke the sound barrier and it was immediately reported as a message. "Only those who believe in themselves survive... and even those who have a few jet accelerators lying around." thought unicorn gladly. Glancing over his shoulder, he saw an endless rainbow trail trailing behind him. "However, I don't seem to disguise it well. While on the other hand who else but me can move here with such speed?" Having come to the conclusion that apparently there was no one who could, he continued to sing to himself: "The wind blows where it wills order that one believe in himself..." "SURPRISE!!!" "What the... Mother fu...n! Oh, you! Curse!!!" Suddenly, from the nearest clouds directly in his path arose pegasus pony. She had purple eyes (even more EYES), snowy white suit, with a golden yellow mane and tail. But he had no time to make an immediate decision to avoid a collision. And even a unicorn was not able to get around an obstacle to such a speed or jump. He just tumbled. Maybe not the most sensible decision taken in his life: he completely lost control over his own body and unicorn fell head over heels in the direction of minus-up and dialed the rapid run-up. He collapsed into the arms so long in parted from him, and certainly had time to miss earth. "Hail to land..." "Due to the sudden attention overload on most of the components of the system, the decision was taken to restart the entire system. Please, do not disconnect from the network, restart will begin in 3, 2, 1..." Canterlot's Herald: "Attention! Weather Ministry warns: In connection with the recent strange rainbows (some reliable sources say the imminent coming of the rainbow-mutant) and with side effects like lightning and, earthquakes, it is advisable to leave your homes only if absolutely necessary. If you still want to go out for some urgent business, note: Precipitation may occur in the form of unicorns." "Select the options for starting up the system: Normal or Safe." "Normal." "Are you sure?" "Yes, damn you!" "CPU strongly recommends that you choose "Safe Mode" startup." "Enter, your mother..." "Welcome." Initially, the unicorn saw nothing around him as he regained consciousness and even decided that what had happened could not be repaired. As the result of such a powerful blow the eye pieces were broken and now he was simply blind. But at the same moment he received a message that he read and which made him sigh with relief. "Current location two meters and thirty eight centimeters below ground." "We have moved beyond the earthly representations and even could not imagine that the troubles above and all sorrows and hardships we beneath the frozen earth... So, this is definitely a time to tie it up with to something good provided it does not bring in a lot of... ground. But sorry, I always wanted to be a folk singer." Dreamily thought unicorn. With some effort, he easily got out of the crater... and stopped in surprise to discover around six colored little horses looking at him all twelve eyes wide with astonishment. First to break the deathly silence was Rainbow Dash: "He is UNICORN..." she said all choked up. "He shines in the sun!" Rarity exclaimed dreamily. "He is rainbow just like you, Dashie!" Pinkie Pie picked up and immediately looked at the rest of her friends. She thought they would accept the new rules of the game but the remaining three were far less enthusiastic. Ponies had no fear (except Fluttershy, of course) but they looked doubtfully at the stranger. "They TALK." Stated heard silver unicorn. "So it must be good and desirable to think about this... alone and certainly far from here." Without saying a word, he sat down on all four legs and abruptly rushed into the sky. Robot broke the sound barrier instantly but suddenly felt some irresistible force pulling him back and with exactly the same acceleration with which the unicorn was trying to escape. "What?!" Unicorn only had time to think it just before he was smeared on the rainbow sound wave and what a mess it created. "Due to the sudden attention overload on most of the components of the system, the decision was taken..." "You're probably kidding me!" "...to restart the entire system. Please do not disconnect from the network, restart will..." "No, no, no! Do not, you hear me?!" "...begin in 3, 2..." "It was necessary to select "Safe Mode"." "...1..." "No, well, can you imagine? Just imagine it! Not only that, he's just a unicorn without a conscience who scampers across the sky stealing my tricks so that he can also make MY Sonic rainboom right from the GROUND!" "Twilie, dear, what has actually happened now?" "Nothing special, Rarity, just in case I surrounded the crash site with an unseen magical sphere because, you know, the cases can be very different." "And what should we to do with it now?" "Well, I'll get a letter to Princess Celestia. As you know for some time now there has been another intruder in her jurisdiction." "What do you mean? Is he an alien?!" "Yes, Pinky, that's what I want to say." "Oh, and maybe I will arrange for him "Welcome to another uninvited guest-alien-party"?" "I don't think so, Pinkie Pie, except that you can decorate his pre-trial detention room." "Aliens, pf..." "Select the options for system startup: Normal or Safe." "Safe" "CPU thanks you for your cooperation and sensible decision." "Blimey." "Welcome!" it sounded from the side. Unicorn got to his feet and looked around, he was in a small room lavishly decorated with colorful balls, with ribbons and garlands and the floor beneath his feet was all strewn with confetti. "Looks like a basement." He noticed that there wasn't any windows and doors in the room and the sight of stairs leading ever upwards. Right next to the stairs there were all six of the small horses whom he had recently befriended and with them also the little... purple... with green spikes... "CPU, don't sleep, who is it?" "Obviously, baby dragon apparently male but I could be wrong." "And why did you need me?" The unicorn thought discontentedly and took few steps toward the pony. Suddenly however, his horn got caught in some invisible obstacle. "And while not as fast as the big guy. I established a magical barrier, so, don't try to escape again. First, we all want to know who or what you are, where you came from, and most importantly what purpose." Said in a solemn voice by a purple alicorn. "You know, you look as if you have pre-prepared this whole speech on paper, don't you?" This is the first time that the unicorn asked anything and spoke his thoughts out loud. "CPU, what's nonsense the letters mean? What other magic-shmagic?" "Magic or magia in Latin is concept used to describe the system of thought in which a person turns to mystical forces to influence events and exert real or apparent influence on the state of matter." "Ah, damn you, I did not mean that." "Girls, he said without opening his mouth!" Hearing this, the silver unicorn finally decided to clarify the situation: "I think we are somehow wrong to start dating. It is time to correct this omission. So, first, I'm a robot unicorn without a name but I have the software "Sorcerer" version one point seventy five, which reflects all my essence so that you can call me that way. Second, I came out here from another world which was one of the many I had visited. To list them all does not make sense. Have I forgotten anything? Oh yeah well, of course, third, and most importantly "for what purpose". Well, I can't say it now." Some time pony digested what they had heard and then suddenly burst out "dam": "And what is a "robot"?" "Well, we have already understood that you are a magician: only an incredibly strong magic unicorn can be carried through the sky at supersonic speed but what's the "software"?" "And how can you talk without opening your mouth?" "And what are you currently thinking about yourself: "I won't tell you about my goal"? Are you a spy? Better just be good and say!" "Oh, girls, just look as he shines!" The unicorn was smitten by the barrage of questions. He came around and lifted a hoof upwards thereby calling for silence and said: "So, everything is clear: that way we'll have a constructive conversation with you will not let us in turn and ask - where am I?" "Oh you're in the basement pre-trial detention room for aliens from other worlds. I decorated it for you to make you feel comfortable in the library of the Ponyville where they live: our princess alicorn Twilight Sparkle and her assistant baby dragon Spike hail from the capital of Equestria Canterlot. It is located not farway from here. Princess Celestia lives there. We are expecting a reply from her informing us about what to do with you. By "we" I mean myself, of course, hi, I'm Pinkie Pie, Applejack (hoof pointing to that who is in a cowboy hat), Rarity, Fluttershy and..." "Pinkie Pie!" Interrupted girlfriend. "...Rainbow Dash." Finished Pinkie Pie. "What the hay?! You told him everything! But if he was a spy? And here we ask questions." "Dashie, but I'm pretty sure that he was not a Spyonoff Spy Shpionovich." "Why such confidence? Oh, yeah, let me guess: Pinkie feeling, isn't it?" Pink pony vigorously nodded in response with a broad smile on her face. "No, I just can't..." Laughter just has killed Sorcerer. "What's so funny?" Blue pegasus asked discontentedly. "Not "what" but "who". You are! You're unbearably funny especially in anger." Breath unicorn. "Okay, it's certainly fun but I decided." "What if it's not a secret?" Quipped Rainbow Dash. "I will only negotiate with an equal - with the pony that could catch me." Reading bewilderment in their eyes Sorcerer decided to clarify: "Pegasus pony with purple eyes, white suit and golden mane and tail." "Who?" "And who is she?" "Well, it's not my problem, I said what I intend to say on the matter. Please excuse me but I need to understand what happened." Having said that, the Sorcerer sat right there. The pony stood dumbfounded leaving them pondering his words, his eyes grew dim and his tail and main faded. "What's with him?" "Looks like he went into hibernation." "Rather, meditation." "This is so rough (but still he shines so!)!" "Okay, girls, suggest you to go upstairs and look for a description of this creature in the library." "But, Twilight!" "And it is not up for discussing." After every member of Harmony band had gone away Sorcerer addressed the CPU: "CPU, I want a full analysis of what happened since my arrival in this world, followed by the report and quickly." "You be carried out straightaway..." Chapter 1. Ghost in The Shining Shell. They are warmed by Sun and washed by showers, Their backs aren't saddled and not beaten by the whip, They are watered by dews and baptized by winds Running around the field, running lovers. Nikolai Emelin "Carpet Field" Suddenly feeling a presence in the room robot unicorn playfully jumped: "Why do you want me?" Said majestically and loudly Pegasus, the snow-white pony with the solar mane. She was standing in front of him with the magical barrier holding him in custody. "Well, finally we meet to talk privately, Pinkie Pie." Said Sorcerer grinning. "Leave this behaviour to Twilight Sparkle. Funny filly role is really your role." "I know no "Pinkie Pie". My name's Surprise!" Hurting and with surprise, Pegasus cried out. "Ay-ay-ay, Pinkie Pie, it's bad to deceive." "Pinkie Pie, are you there? Twilight asked me to tell you to be careful with stranger, and in any case don't go over the barrier." Came the voice of Spike descending down. At the same moment Pegasus changed completely: her mane and tail fur rosy but the wings vanished as if they had never existed. She turned to the call and responded with discontent: "Okey-dokey-lokey, Spike, I will be careful. Thanks and you can not go down." "OK, if you say, Pinkie." Making sure that the dragon had gone pink pony turned round without much hope: "You won't tell anyone about this, will you?" She asked in a pleading voice. "Yes, for God's sake, I promise." "Do you Pinkie promise?" "What?!" "Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye!" "Brutally... O...K..." Unicorn saw the repeated manipulation. "And how did you know that well who I really am?" "That is elementary, Pinky. Identical proportions and voices, curly hairstyles and, of course, (attention, drumroll!) buttsymbols as balloons!" "These are CUTIEMARKS!" Pinkie Pie's pink color suddenly became much more noticeable. "Cutie...?" Asked that unicorn. "Well, cutiemarks: marks reflecting the special talent of each pony and his or her purpose in life. You don't have any, it seems to me look." "And how do you get them?" "Hmm, it needs time." "So, my time hasn't yet come." "CPU, that's your job option. Analyze my purpose in this world and give me a report on what is most likely" "It will be carried out" "Well, Pinkie Pie, something about this: I told all of you when I said I don't know about my goal." "No-no-no, you said that you wouldn't tell us about this." "Oh well, please do not carp. You see, in every world where I have been before there arose some specific task. Afterwards, I was thrown into the next reality." "So, you don't control it, do you?" "Bravo, Pinkie! Take a pie from shelf." Pink pony enthusiastically turned her head apparently in search of the promised pie shelf. "Uh, forget, never mind." Unicorn continued barely suppressing a laugh while looking at disenchanted Pinkie Pie's muzzle. "Try to understand next: every time travel from one world to another I change my shell..." "Shell?" "Well, I told you that I'm a robot... how can I explain it to you? The long and the short of it is, I represent a bit of a ghost in shining knight's armor and..." "GHOST?!" She cried out in terror and Pinkie Pie's bullet sped out of the basement. "...brave..." "Well, and what should I do with it now?" "I can start searching to try and see what you will do in the future." "No, thank you very much but somehow or other I'll do it myself." He had just thought of it as suddenly out of nowhere Pinkie Pie appeared in a Ghostbusters suit in full combat gear: "Well, that's all, ugly ghost, prepare for life-giving portions of the plasma!" "Pinkie Pie, I'm not a ghost." "You're not a ghost?" Plaintively pink pony repeated and her enthusiasm clearly very measured. "Yes, Pinkie, I am sad to have to inform you about this but I'm NOT a ghost." "Then who are you?" "Oh, that's all, I've tired of it FINALLY. I will interpret your same language: I'm an incredibly strong magician traveler through time and space. By performing a heroic feat I manage to get into another world in order to fulfill my mission. I leave one body and move to another endlessly. That somehow..." With great uncertainty the Sorcerer finished and looked at Pinkie Pie's wide opened eyes. "Wow, that's cool! Tell me more!!!" "But..." "Tell me! Tell me!! Tell me!!!" "O...K... but under one condition that in return you will tell me in detail about everything that you have going on here..." "...so I was imprisoned in Ultra-high-tech-indestructible-super-space-cyber-suit. This suit was stolen from Professor Monkey-For-A-Head aka monkey Professor-For-A-Head who created it for the The Evil Queen Pulsating, Bloated, Festering, Sweaty, Pus-filled, Malformed, Slug-for-a-Butt and that he had to return by Psy-Crow but at last it was done. The suit with your humble servant inside fell to the ground straight onto an earthworm named Jim. Thus began our heroic journey to save the princess with whom Jim fell in love." "Oh, and what's her name?" "Princess... What's her name? Horse apples! What's her name... And now it doesn't matter!" "And how did it all end?" "And so, having defeated the nefarious Psy-Crow, our hero, Earthworm Jim, wins back the heart of the lovely Princess (Discord, I'll be damned!) What's her name." "That just the way it was, wasn't it?" "Hmm, you're right, Pinkie, I mixed up something: And so, having defeated the nefarious Psy-Crow, our hero, Earthworm Jim, wins back the heart of the lovely COW! Yes, that's it, the way it was." "Really?!" "You catch me, Pinkie Pie, actually everything was exactly like that: And so, having defeated the nefarious Cow, our hero, Earthworm Jim, wins back the heart of the lovely Cow!" "Are You SURE?!!!" "That's all, I give up: And so, having defeated the nefarious Cow, our hero, Cow, wins back the heart of the lovely Cow!" "That's better." "Yes, of course, sure, Pinkie Pie." "Okay, and that's enough joking but seriously: who are you?" "Pinkie Pie and seriously? This is something new." Sorcerer began to speak but when he looked into the eyes of a pink pony he stopped. "But seriously, I don't know, Pinkie Pie, or rather I don't remember. My spa... my interstellar ship crashed on the land of robo... on the land of magicians and they could somehow get into my mind, my ghos... my soul from the body of the deceased and put it in steel armor. Later, I ran away from them, and after wandering far and wide ended up here probably in the best of worlds, at least one of those where I had to go." "You really don't know about us..." Pinkie Pie said thoughtfully. "But now I know you and that's enough for me." "Listen to everything you just told me... It sounds like you're tired of all this, aren't you?" "That's right, Pinkie Pie, I had a thousand lives. I'm a fu...nny hero with a thousand faces! "A single life is enough for a wise man but a thousand is not sufficient for a fool. I am immortal magician, Pinkie Pie, this is my gift and my curse. And I'm so tired because of this situation. All I dream about for a long time is to find eternal rest. "To sleep and NOT watch dreams". But we can only dream about rest: "The team "ease" is not for us - we will rest when we are crushed". So, but why are we talking about me all this time? Now it's your turn, my little cheater, tell me about this place." "And what do you want to know?" "ABSOLUTLY EVERYTHING!.." Later, late Twilight Sparkle with Spike and the rest of the ponies descended to the laboratory below the library. When they opened their eyes, they were deeply shocked at the picture before them. Robot unicorn sitting on the floor and publishing (There was a quiet buzz.) and the earth pony were asleep beside each other. She put her charming, curly head on his back. "I knew that she would go for barrier." The Princess spoke in a half-hearted, mocking fashion. "Hush, Twilight, don't wake." Whispered Fluttershy. "A spy-ghost knows his business." Rainbow Dash chuckled. "Look how he famously recruited Pinkie Pie!" "You know, Dashie, I think that the opposite is true.." Chapter 0. Start. Carpet field dreaming dreams about Beautiful horses in hobbling caress Tale unraveled, the truth is presented, You will be loved if your will isn't hobbled! Nikolai Emelin "Carpet Field" Waking up the next morning, the first thing Sorcerer discovered was the purple alicorn. He looked at it curiously. "So, CPU, there is something I do not understand: how is it that she is already here and why did you not raise the alarm immediately, as soon as Her Highness appeared?" "Actually, that is what I did, because she dropped from the air (apparently teleported) a few seconds ago." "Hmm ..." It seems there was nothing to say and robot unicorn turned to the princess: "Hello, Twilie, let me ask you, why are you here now?" "Pinkie Pie has told me all about you, Sorcerer." "Oh, really?" "Tell me, do you really not remember anything about your past before you became ... well, now you?" "That's the truth, Twilight Sparkle." "Do not clown around, we've already have one... the way to meet you, the spirit of Chaos - Discord..." "Here's one..." Thought Sorcerer when the draconequus who was near the Sorcerer had arisen. He had a most chaotic body. It had been formed from the parts of different animals: branched and twisted horns, a bird's wing and a bat's too, lion's and an eagle's paw ("Oh, you Frankenstein's sacrifice"). "Here's two." Stated the CPU when Discord came from behind... another Discord. "Here's three!" They said in unison... three draconequuses and simultaneously stretched paws for hand...paw...hoofshake. "DISCORD!" Seemingly came out of nowhere and all present were struck by traditional royal canterlot's loud voice of dark blue alicorn addressing to all the honest company. This brought DISCORD down. "...and Her Majesty Princess of night, younger sister of Princess Celestia - Luna." Twilight Sparkle has ended. "I'm incredibly flattered that my humble person has descended such important pony!" The silver unicorn sincerely rejoiced. "I asked Discord as the unsurpassed master of hypnosis (draconequus made a playful bow) and the moon princess as the patroness of dreams (majestic graceful slight nod) to honor and help me (as well as you) in one small search." At these words purple alicorn's muzzle acquired extremely cunning expression. "I'm afraid to ask... and why do I need this "search"?" "To remember EVERYTHING!" "Of course, it's very interesting, but how will you go to crack it?" Sorcerer asked snidely. Instead of answering him immediately Princess Luna approached and in her "gentle" voice, exclaimed: "SLEEP!" Draconequus just couldn't say anything. "Your Nightesty, do you really think that in such a "quiet" way make him... sleep?" Discord, feeling discouraged finished his tirade, and looked at sleeping robot unicorn. "Well, let's start." Chilly said spirit of chaos, and his eyes seemed to curl into a spiral. Writing research: object repressed memories, "Sorcerer": "...As far I can remember I always see dreams in color. More or less, if my memory serves me, I couldn't understand the difference between waking and sleeping. "Lucid dream" It is probably due to autosuggestion, isn't it? No, not in my case - I tried it but it didn't help. I'm not even a teenager who might have suffered or even enjoyed it... Perhaps, afterwards, sleepwalking is remembered very clearly. However as in the case with dreaming, it couldn't influence what is happening because everything is perceived as if it were actually taking place (which, in fact it was actually, wasn't it?). And... no matter! It's sad, isn't it? I would be inclined to say no rather than yes. This inability to explain the impact of the illusory in turn gave an indescribable feeling of presence and it gave rise to feelings which in no way can be distinguished from the present. And every dream thus became simultaneously real and unreal as if viewing unreal cinematic action. Well, my little pony, welcome to the Traveller's tale club?.." Letter from Princess Twilight Sparkle to Princess Celestia: "Dear Princess Celestia, You won't believe it, but we have another newcomer in Ponyville! However, there is one thing: he is a unicorn... but still he is a robot (almost like our mutual friend, Cybernetics. I mean in the sense that it has a self-awareness) that can do Sonic rainboom (yes, unicorn flying without wings, Rainbow Dash is just fuming!). Using Discord and your younger sister Princess Luna to study his memory, we came to a disappointing conclusion: more memories of the collapse of his starship on "cyborg's" planet which saved his mind from certain death. We failed to remove these memories. The impression develops that up to this point it just doesn't exist, which is, of course, nonsense, but still... Nevertheless, I learned that he, being virtually invulnerable due to his "software" (as I understand - it's kind of special dark magic), can move between worlds and change his current shell only after performing a specific task, randomly determined each time in a different way. Whatever it was, I urge you to visit Ponyville to understand it all for yourself. Your faithful student, Princess Twilight Sparkle." "Pinkie Pie, how long do I have to keep going here?" The Robot Unicorn asked the pink mare who visited him the next day. "Hmm, Twilight said she has sent a full report to Princess Celestia, and she even told that she had written that she had even come to see you personally..." "I can't wait." "...that's why now Twilie is with other ponies, and by "others", I mean all the inhabitants of Ponyville in also are, preparing the town for the arrival of the princess." "And how long have you been so strict with the aliens here?" "Well, said the Princess Celestia (alicorn copies): "I'm tired of Equestria becoming like a thoroughfare for any uninvited guests, it's time to stop this mess"... and continued in the same way. She even found a secret immigration service "Pony in Black" that seems to catch most of these newcomers." "A lot of them if it were up to me?" "You couldn't even imagine! It all began with a unicorn named Lyra, she was still a baby in Equestria (a human baby), so she was turned into a pony and was given to a foster family. Apparently her past haunted her, and she finally learned the truth about her origins. Afterwards, she then returned to the human world to her real family, then she escaped from Discord and came back to Equestria, then together with the six elements of harmony again in the world of "humans", and afterwards Discord defeated all. So Lyra regularly visited by her, though she has such privileges. Somepony says that she is a secret agent in the service of Her Majesty." In one breath PInkie Pie blurted out and continued. "And now this very moment you (in the sense of aliens) as a cornucopia burst: first there was Chell (mute and later conspiracy pony), which defeated the big meanie grumpy mean-meanie-pants GLaDOS by magic portals (by the way she now lives in Ponyville), then look at constantly hiding Shadowmere stallion that we all seem to be betrayed, but in fact it turned out that like as well as saved from next coming Discord (Discord poor, battered him as before), he really died (Shadowmere but not Discord). So... also there were Ray and Max, Max for a couple of Daring Do (our local adventurer) defeated Discord... again and Ray... (here the voice of Pinky at once became sad) Ray unwillingly became a member of the political intrigues that led to the very serious consequences for one and all, it was then that we met with strangers and was all strictly "What did you say your name was? Newcomer? Kindly Single, my dear, there is no place like home". That's the way. Especially aliens "lucky" Rainbow Dash (they love her, or what?), she even once got into the world of "humans" for fifteen years (we passed two weeks here) because of Twilight's bad spell, so now you managed to see that her character became... not very kindly. And still there is the adopted daughter of Twilight - Nyx - reincarnation of Nightmare Moon, but it seems a bit of a different story." All the while Sorcerer listened to her and drank in every word filtering it by the CPU which was interested in his information. The unicorn felt closer than ever to a solution, but he couldn't help feeling that he had missed some very important detail. Suddenly, the robot's eye saw a flash somewhere behind. Looking back, he nevertheless didn't find anything suspicious. "Wow, you had a cutiemark!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed happily. "But only on one side." Sorcerer immediately looked at his rump, which was now adorned with blue and orange... portals? "Pinkie, my dear, as you said, what was name of pony, who won some GLaDOS using "magic" portals?.." Some time later, after Pinkie Pie at the Sorcerer's request went looking for Chell to bring her to him, the unicorn suddenly heard a mocking voice from above: "Well, well, well, look at that, he's here with us: ghost-alien-spy with a brazen face!" "Oh, hi, Rainbow Dash, I'm also glad to see you. And nothing brazen, but in reality, silver, I saw myself in the mirror." "And does your conscience still let you deny it?! Even a brazen one: stealing other pony's tricks, doing Sonic rainboom better than me..." "Oh, Dash, you're still..." "But I once did a double rainboom!" "Ah, yes, of course, resorting to doping with a magic potion that you "borrowed" from the Twilight Sparkle and razed Ponyville to the ground. Bravo!" "What? How did you... Who told you?!" "One pink bird on a ponytail brought..." "Well, Pinkie Pie..." "So, stop, I can see where you're going first, no one made a Sonic rainboom better than you..." "But..." "No buts!" Secondly, I'm a fu...nny robot, Rainbow, think: MA-CHI-NE, yes it is like a cart envy. All my talents I got nothing, if they are compared to you jigger not stand!" "Why is that?" "Only because you made it all by yourself." This incredibly simple idea puzzled blue filly: "Exactly... how I did it... I used to because I just made it myself!" Pegasus happily exclaimed, flying above the floor, she began to dance in triumph. "Myself, myself, myself..." There was a deliberately loud cough which quickly brought her to her senses. "Hmm, well, I can't waste any more time here with you. Twilight has probably already lost her hooves looking for me... so, I have to go!" "Hey, Dash." He caught up with her near the exit. "What?" "We're with you know that you're twenty percent cooler than any other pony." Rainbow Dash said nothing, but when she met with Pinkie Pie and Chell leaving the library, an incredibly pleased smile played on her muzzle. "You are such a sycophant!" "And where did you pick up these words, CPU?" "When you live with pony..." "I did not flatter her, but all the girls love compliments, even if they hide it." "Even such a girl like Rainbow Dash?" "Especially these girls like Rainbow Dash!" "Here we go! Meet, Sorc, this is Chell, Chell, this is Sorcerer - robot unicorn, I told you about. He wants to talk with you..." Pinkie Pie caught his expressive eyes. "...alone... well, probably. I won't bother you!" Leaving them, Pinkie Pie made a sign to sorcerer with her hoof that said: "then tell me about everything", and robot turned to the "portal" pony: "Well, hello, Chellopony. Well, well, don't frown, I was joking. Tell me, please, about yourself in detail. I was particularly interested in how you won some GLaDOS..." "Sorcerer!.. Oh, Chell, hi, what are you doing here?" Asked Twilight, somewhat discouraged. "Oh, Twilight, you know, and Chell's leaving. Thank you, Chell, you helped me incredibly! Did you want to say something, Twilie?" While waiting carefully ,pony alicorn excitedly blurted out. "Princess Celestia is here in Ponyville, I'll take you to her by magic, mind you, the barrier is still active, so no nonsense!" "Well, if you insist, Princess..." Making his way through the dense... jungles of Everfree Forest, the robot unicorn didn't stop cursing: "At first I was attacked by some ridiculous wooden dogs, then manticore (MANTICORE!). What's next? Cerberus? Chimera? Or maybe a hydra? A Gorgon they happen to have here? Minotaur? Although, compared with alien wars, it's sophomoric. Just the local fauna, cute little animals..." "Straight ahead hydra..." "Ah, damn you...!" "...and Cerberus..." After a while, Sorcerer got to the edge of the forest and took a deep breath: "That's probably enough for today. CPU, as it is with direction finding, found something similar?" "You won't believe me, but it seems so..." "Why are you following me?" Suddenly there was a plain clear, distinct mechanical voice. Robot Unicorn looked around and immediately found... another robot in the form of a pony standing somewhat apart and he carefully studied the newcomer. "GLaDOS?" Sorcerer asked, just in case. "Yes, it is my name, but you did not answ..." She didn't finish in time, as GLaDOS was blown to pieces by the rainbow blow created a robot unicorn by jet accelerators from the place where he stood still a moment ago. "Robot unicorn attacks... And wins!" Sorcerer said smugly and looked at all that was left from a recent opponent. "Like candy from a foal... Something it was too simp..." Suddenly he fell like a stone because of holding wires that bound his legs tight. Lying motionless on the ground, Sorcerer was unable to move, but he could watch as creeping head robot named GLaDOS made its waw towards him with one surviving eye-eyepiece, staring straight at him... Tearing sky rainbow blow GLaDOS in robot unicorn body flew at full speed towards Ponyville. Capturing this shell calmly, she immediately appreciated its potential hiding. Now she will be able to continue her precious experiences and no one can stop her. No one, except that fat thick devourer of cakes... Oh, how unbearably long she had to hide in the woods forever wild, nurturing unworkable plans for revenge this little stuff...Chell... "Chell?" Surprised GLaDOS almost fell to the ground, but still managed to stay in the air, touching hooves. There was no mistake: there in the street below Ponyville was pony so hated by robot and her shameless eyes staring straight at her! At GLaDOS! Although, no, she also thinks that it is the foolish robot unicorn. This chance must not be missed, to spit on experiments, to spit on all the world, there is only Chell, and she must do everything possible so that there will be no more! "Now I will feed you... With rainbow cake rolls!" Careful aim, GLaDOS again checked targeted path, made correction for the wind, correction for correction, and finally convinced of the impossibility of error, activated the jet accelerators... and fell to the ground a few yards from the target. "Upsy..." "Central processing unit, what does it all mean?" "CPU with full responsibility ready to confirm that it is not to blame." "But then... then..." GLaDOS suddenly dawned on her. "NO!" "Honey I'm home!" Taking shell robot unicorn again under his control, Sorcerer turned to stand very close Chell: "Chell, it's me, Sorcerer, it's over, tell Princess Celestia, her silly-clever trap cleverly-worked..." "I can hear you!" It is difficult to understand cause of why the ruler of Equestria voice was so discontented. Her brilliant plan called "silly-clever" or sincere joy had worked. She, Chell and Sorcerer were surrounded by almost all the inhabitants of Ponyville. "Let me out!" Came a sudden furious roar from the mouth of the Unicorn, which led half of ponies to recoil in horror. "Who is that who spoke so cute?" Celestia asked mockingly. "I am THE DEVIL!" The other half of the inhabitants of Ponyville at these words immediately fainted. "Well, if you are the devil, and frees yourself." This GLaDOS had no answer. Princess meanwhile appealed to the robot unicorn: "Sorcerer, I and all the inhabitants of Ponyville are eternally grateful to you..." "Your Majesty, forgive my eternal tactlessness, but it can not be put aside and immediately let us get down to business?" Pinkie Pie standing nearby, heard these words, and suspecting something was wrong, she roused indignant Twilight ("How could he just interrupt the princess?"): "Twilie, what is he actually talking about?" "Well, Princess Celestia and he agreed that after the capture of GLaDOS, she would send him to the sun..." Although still indignant, Twilight spoke thoughtfully. "Oh, Pinkie..." "No, wait, you can't!" Pink filly ran out of the crowd and stopped in front of the princess and a robot unicorn. "Oh, hi, Pinkie Pie." said Sorcerer indifferently. Ignoring the Celestia, as if she didn't exist here with tearful eyes pony looked at sitting robot as if nothing had happened. "Why didn't you tell me anything?" "Huh? And what had I to tell you? Oh, you probably mean my one-way flight to the sun?" The Indifference in his voice changed to a sneer. "Actually it was supposed to be a secret." Very dissatisfied, he glanced at a huge crowd of ponies. "I just don't know what went wrong..." "But I thought..." Pinkie Pie almost whispered through torrents of tears. "What were you thinking about, Pinkie Pie?!" Resentment in his voice changed to a growing anger at unicorn. "You are speaking live pink pony, but I am ROBOT, hopping between worlds as a pinball's ball and what could we have in common, pray tell? What, no answer? That's right, let's go, Your Majesty, we have one small piece of unfinished business." "...I thought we were friends." Almost sobbed Pinkie Pie. Sorcerer had already been preparing to leave but on hearing these unbearable words stopped short, then, without saying anything, spun back and rushed to the pink filly... "Princess, what are you waiting for? It was evident also that he was crazy and he was going to... HUG her!" Gently hugging Pinkie Pie, Sorcerer completely inaudible to everyone else quietly whispered something in her ear, apparently they were paying attention, because the mare suddenly stopped crying but could barely even smile. Suddenly somewhwere behind the side broke and went out, as it has happened to him before. "What is it, Pinkie? Cutiemark?" "No... buttsymbol!" Pinkie Pie chuckled. "What does it portray?" "Look for yourself." Sorcerer turned his head for a second to see, then looked with lovely at pony sky-blue eyes and said: "I have to go." "But..." Sorcerer covered her mouth with a hoof. "No, Pinkie Pie, because I can't always control GLaDOS, besides, until I hunted it for myself it had to hunt and stay in the stomach of a hydra - it's one of those things that I gladly would like to forget. I've done my program in the world, it is time to leave." "And you won't be able to stay?" "If I couldn't do it on other worlds, it is clear that it won't work here. And I'd like to finally put an end to all of this. Remember, please, what I told you." While saying this, unicorn hugged pink pony for the last time, then turned and walked to Princess Celestia. "Your Majesty, I'm ready." Then he looked at the "living rainbow sea" (well, it was like the "sea", maybe it was a lake?), surrounded him on all sides: "Farewell, ponies, you are the best that was once in my life!" Exchanging glances with the princess, he nodded to her and sat down, suddenly he straightened up, sped up towards the portal in the sky, sculpted magic Celestia and went to the sun. Throw at him before his leap view the princess saw cutiemark portraying the muzzle of Pinkie Pie, smiling in response to fun sun. "Sliding Doors, station "Terminal - Equestria." Next stop, "The ultimate - the Sun." "And you aren't as boring as you seemed all this time, CPU. It was nice doing business with you." "Mutually." Quite unexpectedly, from the shaggy pony, looking for rainbow arrow, tearing into the sky, flew the pony pegasus in her snow-white suit and golden mane and tail. She rushed after the robot unicorn as he was approaching the portal. "She has WHITE fur!" Applejack whistled. "She has a GOLDEN mane!" Rarity screamed. "She has PURPLE eyes!" Fluttershy whispered. "She has WINGS!" Rainbow Dash exclaimed. "She can FLY!" Summed up Twilight Sparkle. But there, when pegasus was already very close to the end, Sorcerer suddenly vanished right in her face, passing through the portal, which in turn instantly closed. When she came down from sky to earth, pony was immediately surrounded by loyal friends, they said something to her almost in unison, but she certainly didn't hear them, and could only look at the sky, at the unbearably bright sun, which caused her eyes to water against her will... Epilogue. Part 1. I don't remember the name of this small town I don't remember what it was a century ago But I took you in hand, as the poor bird To whom wounded by stupid kids. I whispered tales of distant lands, I would like you to do something nice I promised you I'd be back in a month, Although I knew that I couldn't come back. We make so much pain for those to whom we give the sky, And we have to be ashamed of the sweet words And there is a cage in my chest, and there is a heart inside Beating, breaking wings, this poor bird. I drank sweet wine to wash away this bitterness Forgot everything that was started all over again, But on soft beds I didn't know the rest, Because this bird in her dreams cried. In a strange place where the shadows will meet each other again, After a long journey, after a lifetime of hate I have to ask about one to kindly God - To the poor bird forgive me. We make so much pain for those to whom we give the sky, And we have to be ashamed of the sweet words And there is a cage in my chest, and there is a heart inside Beating, breaking wings, this poor bird. Ilya Kormiltsev "Poor bird" Pinkamena Diana Pie was on the balcony in a candy store "Sugar Corner", leaning on the railing with the front hooves, and lost in thought looking at the sunset. "Oh, Pinkie, why are you still funny silly!" Her fur had returned to its pink color, though now it was more dull, and her mane and tail had lost its volume and smooth straight locks cascaded down. "Surely you could think that we leave forever?" However, the most unusual thing was the fact that she was clothed: short orange skirt and a pink sweater. "We will meet again, do you hear me?" "Promise?" Pinkie Pie whispered into the void of the night sky. "As a traveler with experience I assure you completely!" "Pinkie promise." "Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye!" Remembering how he whispered that in her ear the last time, pink filly couldn't maintain the barely perceptible smile. "I got you a little surprise, Pinkie Pie, you will find it there in the laboratory under the library." Pony hoofs raised through (no, well, that's how they do it?) small note found in the basement of Twilight Sparkle, at eye level and she reread its contents: "I had a thousand lives, But the rest I have found only one, It came with the realization of thought: I became happy only with you!" Epilogue. Part 2. Whoever gives us light, Whoever gives us the darkness. And never give us an answer for A simple question - Why? Whoever gives us life, Whoever gives us death. Who wrote all of us, as a story, And covered in a white envelope. Ilya Kormiltsev "Born in the night" He slept... tossed restlessly, muttered something quite unintelligible then suddenly screamed and woke up. For some time the guy lay motionless staring unblinking at the ceiling until he heard next: "What is really the matter my sweet hare ("I hate it when she... hey, wait, what?")? Had a nightmare again?" Asked somebody who was hidden from him by a night mist. "Yes, right." The guy answered vaguely, and he thought to himself: "Well, CPU, where did we come in this time? CPU, where are you there?" "You don't have to try, it's more you can ever answer." Suddenly said someone who was stayed near the single door in the room (or chamber?). Due to the dim lighting there and the fact that he remained standing in the doorway, it was impossible for Sorcerer to consider him carefully. "What kind of fruit are you?" "My name is Clyde Ironman, I'm your twin brother and I am the one who will fulfill your fondest wish." "Really? Well, then, dear, please bring me a pony and a plastic rocket..." "You don't understand, I am your creator." "So, it comes again... It looks like I'm floating on the sea of nothingness... Maybe that never happened with you? You wake up in the morning and you want only one thing: that the darkness swallow you. And not to see again, and even better not to live..." "That's what I'm gonna do to for you." "I did say that out loud, didn't I?" "No, I just thought about it... in your head." Sudden rage gripped robot unicorn, he was about to throw himself on the intruder, grab his throat, break, destroy, but... suddenly realized that he couldn't move. Sorcerer realized that it's all over. "Wait... When you... Remove me, I will turn into... what?" "Into a snowflake, circling outside." "Not the worst alignment... and although I despise you for all that you did to me, in spite of this there is one thing for which I have to say thank you... Thank you." "For what?" "For Surprise..." Without answering, the silhouette in the doorway vanished in the mist and shut the iron door behind him... Under the wheel still moaning stones Trembles dust runners dashing And there isn't necessary to pull the reins on myself Where poetry will stop. Under the golden mane I see the wound I made it myself cause of fear and whip I drove a chariot and felt that I would be in Sky at worst a star! And I was again among the cozy walls The rest was not enough! Asleep among walls of extinct eyes I stopped existing! And played by the same horses in the field Dawn tired cause of their hoofs What are they doing? Whose they share? Knocks on the field is not my miles? I at tired horses stone threw I was tired and I became quiet as a snake Go there, where there I was, unsolicited No fire in me and I no longer exist! And I again among the cozy walls The rest was not enough! Among asleep walls of extinct eyes I stopped existing Alexei Gorshenev "Restless" Clyde Ironman. Record number 8: "... Overflowing emptiness of mortal life... No, perhaps life-giving death at a leisurely gallop previously knocked me unconscious in someone else's subconscious. Inanimate body becomes swollen because of his thoughts bursting through. Thus unusually it seems to me that I exist in reality, but the feeling passes quickly. maybe I just got in some fantasy world, and there was no one to invent me out of here. Cheery longing! There is no point in hand poured out from the trees on the flayed skin of words..."