Forbidden Honesty

by Music4ever


Burden

Love makes your soul crawl out from it's hiding place~Zora Neale Hurston

I cried, I didn't know how long I stayed like that, but I did. How could I hurt my friends, my sister, even Spike, and not have a single memory back?? The ache in my chest was the only feeling that kept me awake. If in less than an hour I was going to remember everything, then it was going to kill me. No, I am not going to let that creature win, I have to do something, anything.

"I'm so sorry" whispered Applejack. "You don't deserve this, it's all my fault."

No matter how much Applejack tried to blink the tears away, somehow more tears made their way to her eyes. If she hadn't fallen in love with Spike she wouldn't be here, it's all her fault. Her emotions were such a mess, and all those tears she had tried to keep at bay were now spilling over. In less than a second, her head was pounding and her ache was stronger than ever. She had never felt something so powerful, and in an instant, images started to play in her mind.

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Applejack slowly opened her eyes, only to find herself in the Everfree Forest. This time the forest was dark and cold, so cold it made her shiver.
"How did I get here?"
In front of her appeared Twilight, with a concerned look evident in her eyes.

"Applejack stop it, why are you acting like this, this isn't you!" said Twilight.

"Twilight?! I'm so glad I found you I-

"Oh come on Twilight, relax." said Applejack.

"Twilight……. I'm over here, why can't you-" What's going on here, oh no, it must be my memory. This is what I did to my friends.

"Relax!! We only have three days left to defeat Chrysalis before it's over……." yelled Twilight.

"Do you have any idea what will happen if we don't defeat her?!"

"We are doomed!!!" explained Applejack.

"Is that what you want, for everypony to be living in fear??"

"Then pair up Spike and Rarity already." said Applejack as she rolled her eyes.

"Dammit Applejack, don't you get it?"

"The only thing I do get is the fact that you'll never find your special somepony." responded Applejack with an evil smirk.

"Applejack!"

"Sorry, did I struck a nerve? Or was it your pride" Applejack smirked at her remark.

Realization hit Twilight. "You love Spike, don’t you. That's why you’re acting like this!!!"

"As if I would do that."

There's only one way to know the truth. "A-Applejack do you like Spike."

"I.....I well, I." Applejack's eyes roamed everywhere and soon they started to turn yellow.
"That ain't none of your business."

"It is! I'm your friend, please tell me." begged Twilight.

"Friend, yeah right, and I'm an alicorn." joked Applejack with a fake laugh.

"Do you?"

"Really Twilight, right now it's not the time to talk about boys." snapped Applejack. "And I don't like Spike."

Twilight gather all her courage and walked up to Applejack. "No matter what you say, your eyes will always speak the truth." Twilight took a last glance at her friend and walked away and so did the image of her. No longer was Applejack in the Everfree Forest, she was outside Zecora's house. Her other self walking away as her friends came outside.

"Darling, think of what you're saying, please!!!!" begged Rarity taking a step towards her friend.

"I have….. And you know what, I'd be better without any of you!"

"But sis we have to be together, we-"

"No! I'm stronger without all of you, I don't need you!"insisted Applejack.

"How dare talk like that to you sister!"exclaimed Rarity

"Look who's talking."

"Applejack please don't leave." begged Spike.

Applejack stopped moving and glanced towards him.This was all his fault, he was the one to blame."You are the worst of them."

Hurt passed Spike's eyes as Applejack paced around them.

Applejack's eyes widen as she heard the harsh words come out of her mouth with venom."No! Spike don't listen to her, that's not true." yelled Applejack, trying to get their attention.

"Actually, you're so pathetic, I mean look at you……….. no wings, short, a coward-"

"Stop it!" screamed Twilight.

With one swift movement Applejack came dangerously close to Spike."I feel sorry for the mare that's going to be stuck with you. If I were you……. I'd just quit on finding my special somepony!!! I bet you don't even have one."

"If you are so excited to leave, then just go! I'm not stopping you, and neither are
they."responded Spike with the same coldness Applejack spoke with.

Applejack smirked at his bravery."Finally, somepony that understands. Oh and, don't come looking for me."

"No, Spike it ain't true, please look at me." Applejack tried to touch Spike, but her hoof passed through him just as if she were a ghost. "Spike please look at me, Spike I love you!" all her tries were in vain as Applejack's legs gave up on her and she stayed crying on the floor, while the images, little by little, started to fade again.

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The instant the door flung open, we knew something bad was going to happened, and you know what…….. it actually did. I can't believe we were caught, and forced to go back to the cells Chrysalis had put us in. I wonder if Applejack is still out there. The way she treated all of us was horrible, but I know her, and that's wasn't her. Maybe she was forced to act like that or maybe she was poisoned, I hope it's the that.

Spike hasn't been himself since Applejack. He refuses to talk to any of us, and all he does is look at the floor. He didn't even help out when we were attacked, he gave up so easily at the mention of her name...

"Spike, I need to ask you something."

"Go ahead." responded Spike weakly, with his head down.

I stopped in hesitation, should I do it? He's emotionally crushed, maybe later."Never mind."

"I'm so sorry your plan didn't work Twilight." apologies Fluttershy.

"It's alright…... at least we're all together." her voice came out calm, but her mind was
jumbled with many problems and zero solutions.

"I hope Discord comes back."

"Wait...DISCORD?!" screamed Twilight at Fluttershy's comment.

"He's trying to help us, and I know that he has a plan." insisted Fluttershy

"Can things get any crazier?"muttered Twilight under her breath.

"Discord is Fluttershy's special somepony um, well draconequus."chirped Pinkie with a big smile.

"He's WHAT?!" screamed Twilight in horror.

Fluttershy blushed ferociously."I-It might be too soon to know that, girls."

"Do you think Applejack misses us?" asked Spike.

"I-I don't know."

"Does she even care about me?"

"Of course she does! I bet she's missing being with you right now." said Twilight, trying to cheer up Spike.

"I find that hard to believe." whispered Spike to himself.

In an instant the door was abruptly opened, showing two changeling in armour with no emotion visible in their features. Everypony stayed frozen in their spot as the changelings marched inside and grabbed Spike.

"W-What are you doing?!" screamed Twilight.

"Queen's orders."

"W-where are you taking him?!" asked Twilight as she tried to grab Spike, but failed as one of the changelings stood in front of her.

"To another cell."

Twilight's eyes filled up with worry and concern."You can't, Spike! Spike! Spike!!" her calls were in vain as the door was closed and locked.

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My soul felt dead and my heart went numb. I've never been like this. and its an entirely i new feeling, one that I don't like at all. It's right then and there that I realized how much Applejack's absence was affecting me, but my mind couldn't accept that, refusing to welcome the hollow in my chest. Although they were dragging me through the floor, I felt nothing. Right now I'm just breathing, but not alive. The only sound I heard were those haunting words she had said, those last words.
The changelings stopped moving and a click was heard, as they might be opening a door. Good…... I really want to be alone right now. They started to drag me inside, and I swear that either I heard somepony sob, or maybe I'm going crazy. The sobbing stopped, and I heard a gasp on my right side. just great……. I'm not alone after all.

"Don't try anything." ordered a changeling as he shut the door, leaving me and somepony else alone in the dark.

The silence took over, and for a few minutes or hours later, the voice talked.
"I'm so sorry Spike, I-I am so sorry..."

Applejack? She's here? No, it must be my mind. I'm going crazy, I can't stop thinking about her, and it's affecting me.

"Spike...please say something."

"Is it really you, are you.....actually here?" asked Spike.

"Oh Spike, I'm so happy to hear your voice again."

Her voice sounded painful and the longing was there too. Why did she miss him? After all he's nothing special, he's just a simple and plain dragon.

A sweet voice interrupted his thoughts."Spike, I want to apologize for everything I said, but the thing is that, well, um you see I-I was put or placed I-"

"Applejack, are you alright?"
As he said her name he started to feel alive once more.

"I am now."

"What were you trying to say."

"If I tell you, I'd ruin our friendship and I don't want to lose you……. I can't lose you."

"Then at least tell me why you said those things to me."

"I made a stupid mistake because I.....I feel something for somepony, but they have a crush on somepony else, and my heart was heartbroken, so I wasn't thinking clearly. I let my emotions take over me, and I ended up losing my friends and my sister. Then she did something to me and I had no control of my body or my words. I'm so sorry, and I hope that one day…….. you can forgive me."

"I forgive you." unconsciously Spike spoke, not really knowing why he spoke up.
"Y-You do?!"

"Yes.......Applejack………. who do you like?"

"I can't tell, I'm sorry."

The only thing Spike wanted to do right now was walk closer to Applejack and comfort her. "Stop apologizing, you had no idea you were going to fall into a trap."

"You’re right, I didn't know. Yet that doesn't excuse everything I said and did."

"Hey, don't worry……. we’ll get out of here, I promise."

"That's one of the reasons I love you." whispered Applejack.

Although Spike wasn't by her side somehow, he managed to hear what she said. "You said something?"

"I.....um, maybe."

Spike chuckled. "Do you know that you are cute when you get nervous?"

By now Applejack was blushing ferociously and her heartbeat had increased. "I....well, no I didn't."

Spike wanted to have Applejack by his side. He needed her just like flowers need water. "I wish I could take these chains off, they're really uncomfortable." said Spike as he pushed on the chains.

"Don't waste your energy, it's useless."

Spike abruptly stopped, he couldn't believe it! Applejack just gave up, well not on his watch."No, I'm not giving up and neither should you Applejack, there has to be something...anything we can do to get out.

"Most ponies underestimate you, Spike. You ain't weak nor dumb……. you're brave and intelligent, and I gotta say……... I admire you."

Spike was shocked, Applejack looked up to HIM!!"You, you admire me?!” asked Spike.
"Yes." Applejack let out a small chuckle. "Yes, I admire you a lot. You're smart, brave, kind, funny and you're soo handsome. I....I feel safe around you." by now Applejack was so close to revealing her feelings to Spike.

Would this mare stop surprising him? "You feel safe around me?!"

"All the time."

"Funny, I feel relaxed when I'm with you, as if I didn't need to do anything to please you." replied Spike

"You never have to do anything……... just be yourself, that's all I want you to do."whispered Applejack.

"Applejack, can you promise me something?"

"Anything."

"Never change, you're perfect just the way you are." Spike whispered softly.

"I promise, if you promise me to do what makes you happy."

"I promise."

"Good, now lets pick up them spirits and get to work. These chains aren't going to unlock by themselves!"

Spike gave her a smile, although she couldn't see him."Where do we start??"

2 hours later

"Any progress there partner?"

A rattle could be heard before Spike rested his wrists."No, I can't tell it's too dark."

"Dammit it's been hours! We should be out of here by now!!" screamed Applejack to herself.
"Hey, don't worry we'll come up with an idea. We should rest for now."

"No!! We have to keep going, we can't stop until-"

"Applejack, I know that you want to save everypony, and I also know that you blame yourself for everything, but let me tell you something……... This isn't your fault. We all make mistakes…... to learn from them and not to let them overcome us. Please rest……...it's for your health."

Applejack surrendered after all Spike had a point. "Alright, we'll call it a day."

"Good night Applejack."

.....

"Night Spike." a few minutes passed and Applejack couldn't keep it anymore, she had to say it."I love you." her words cut the silence and soon afterwards, sleep consumed her and just before she blacked out, she heard those words she was dying to hear.

"I love you too."