//------------------------------// // Break down // Story: The Adventures of Cleansing Flame // by Fire_brand //------------------------------// Journal: Yesterday was awesome yet terrible at the same time. When I woke up I saw that all the girls had bruises all over, Applejack caught the worst of it. There was a huge misunderstanding of what happened between Applejack and I, but it was resolved. The worst part of my day was easily the train. When I sat on the train I had an overpowering flashback. I’d swear I was crazy except listening Rarity to complain for days on end has to be worse than being sent to Tartarus. Anyway Dappleshore was awesome. This town is settled in the middle of 2 forests and a mountain range. The cider is amazing! But I’ll have to beware of the wheat cider, while easily one of my favorite ciders, just 2 mugs were enough to make me quite drunk. I’ll have to talk to the guy who helped me last night, Wheat Thin I think his name was. As I finish writing Applejack steps out of the bathroom, fresh out of the shower. She had woken up before me today. Looking at her my jaw drops, how did I manage to make this piece of heaven mine? Applejack blushes “Awe shucks Flame stop starin at meh.” I shake my head “No can do, if I did that I think Celestia herself would punish me.” She turns a deeper shade of red “Well then ya mind helpin me dry mah mane? It gets unruly when wet.” I stand up and walk over “What do ya need me to do?” Did I say ya and not you? “I need ya ta run this here brush through it then tie it up when it’s dry.” This process takes about 5 minutes. I wonder why I never noticed just how thick her mane was before. I turn out to be terrible at tying up Applejack’s mane. She has to guide my hooves through the process “Don’t worry about it sugercube, thanks for trying.” With that she kisses my cheek, catching me completely off guard. This causes me to partially collapse and just stare straight ahead. After a moment I snap out of it and follow a giggling Applejack down to breakfast. I instantly drool once I spot the breakfast buffet; they have food from all over Equestria. I happily trot over and grab a mushroom, pepper, cheese, and hay omelet, a Fillydelphia staple. Fluttershy notices my joy “Oh, did something good happen? You seem awfully cheery today Flame.” “Oh nothing much, part of it is the omelet, it’s my favorite breakfast food. The other part is a secret.” Fluttershy accepts this explanation and returns to her flower sandwich. As we finish, we collectively head back to the “cider zone” as I call it. Halfway there Applejack says “So Flame, are you going to get drunk again?” I playfully say “Only if my gorgeous marefriend doesn’t accompany me.” As she gives me her smile she says “Well then ah guess ah’ll have ta go with ya. Ah can’t have ya getting plastered on meh.” “Sounds good to me, so where are we going first?” “Well Pinkie said she found a chocolate cider yesterday…” “Wait, chocolate cider??? I thought she was joking about that!” “Well do ya wanna find out?” “Why not? I just hope it tastes good.” So Applejack and I walk around trying to find chocolate cider. Along the way we find: mango, strawberry, banana mango, apple cinnamon, and many other strange combinations. I must admit, while some flavors didn’t sound like they would mix, they mixed quite well. Finally we find the chocolate cider, along with a chocolate covered Pinkie Pie. As we walk up to Pinkie I say “I guess you weren’t kidding about a chocolate cider Pinkie. Though I don’t think you had to bathe in it.” Pinkie laughs at me “Well of course I had to bathe in it! Chocolate is the best flavor ever!” At this I feel my face contort in confusion. Applejack taps me on the shoulder “Don’t get like that Flame, Ya shoulda been around fer the incident with Discord. When he had cotton candy clouds that rained chocolate, Pinkie was so happy she stood underneath the clouds, bathing in and drinking chocolate.” I smile in disbelief and say “I don’t think I’ll ever understand you Pinkie. But now I’m curious if this cider is that good.” I take a sip of the cider, only to realize that chocolate cider was very good. I’m about to take a gulp when Pinkie pours some hot sauce into my mug. I give Pinkie the stink eye as I take my gulp. I drop my mug as heat builds from my stomach, crawling up my throat, and into my mouth. With my mouth on fire I grab a mug of banana pineapple cinnamon cider and down it quickly. This does nothing to cool my mouth, so I down many more in a very quickly. After 10 mugs my mouth has finally cooled down. So I walk up to Pinkie, my voice now raspy “What the hay was that for Pinkie? Are you trying to burn my tongue off?” Pinkie shrugs “What? Don’t blame me if you can’t handle hot sauce.” I grab the bottle “Lemme see that. (It’s labeled “extremely hot: Caution”) EXTREMELY HOT?!?! PINKIE!” At this Pinkie dissolves into laughter. Rainbow flies in “So what I miss?” She looks at the hot sauce label “I see you’ve been subject to a Pinkie prank and quite a good one too” and starts laughing. I walk away from the laughing duo “Yeah well this prank has left me with a burnt tongue, I’m not sure anything will taste right again.” Applejack follows and says “Don’t worry about it Flame, Pinkie’s pranked nearly all of us.” I look straight at her with a cocked eyebrow “Nearly all of us? Who hasn’t she pranked?” She answers flatly “Fluttershy, Pinkie’s worried her pranks will hurt her feelings.” I release my eyebrow “Good to know she has limits. Well I’m getting hungry, what do you want to eat?” We leave the area and find an older looking sandwich diner. Walking inside, it feels like we were transported 50 years into the past. We both order a fully loaded flower sandwich. After the meal we walk and talk about small stuff. Mostly about the cider and our favorite flavors. Applejack’s favorite from here is the Banana Mango, mine is the wheat. As were talking Applejack says “Well we ave time now. Do ya wanna continue to talk about ya growin up?” I’m happy to tell her “Sure where did I leave off?” “Ya were 7 and talking about tha bullies.” “Right so they just kept at it…” I get to the point where I got my cutie mark. I hear Wheat Thin say to us “So I see you’re not drunk off your rocker today.” “Ah, Wheat Thin! Yeah I’ve been careful not to get terribly drunk today. I fear Applejack might have gotten a tad mad with me If I did that again.” I get a stiff hoof in the back from Applejack “More than a tad, it was not fun ta listen to ya aimlessly babble.” Wheat just snickers “Yeah, he was getting pretty bad when he left last night.” Slightly embarrassed I say “Alright enough of that. Wheat, do you know why the wheat cider is so alcoholic? None of the other ciders are like that.” Wheat shrugs “Do you really think I’m going to tell you a family secret? “ Applejack asks “Alright, then how do ya keep makin cider all the way through winter? Nothin grows then but Dappleshore makes cider all year round, how?” Wheat Thin looks surprised but answers calmly “It’s a combination of things really. The biggest part is that we buy a lot of farm crops from all over Equestria and store them in insulated dry warehouses. The second part is greenhouses. This way we can grow something all year round. The greenhouses aren’t that large though; they don’t allow for a lot of growth at one time, but it is better than nothing.” Applejack nods “That makes sense. Buying crops in bulk allows for tha production of tha top grade cider Dappleshore is known fer. Ah’d never thought of using greenhouses to grow in tha winter. Just don’t have enough space on the farm ta accommodate.” Not wanting to be the third wheel I say “Wow you two, that sounds awesome but I’m curious. What part of cider production do you play in your family Wheat?” He again answers flatly “I play no part in cider production. My family is large enough that I’m not needed to help out. My job is to help grow the wheat and to bring the cider to the stand.” Wheat Thin then looks around as he realizes something “Oh horse apples I’m late, I gotta go. It was nice to talk to you!” With that he runs off. I look at Applejack “Well I should have known he wouldn’t tell us why the wheat cider is so strong. But hey you make cider! How do you make it stronger?” Applejack talks as we head back “Well sugercube, it’s all about how long we allow the apples to ferment. We could never make tha apple cider that strong. There must be somethin’ in wheat that allows fer further fermentation than any other crop.” With that Applejack begins to yammer on about cider making as we wander the streets. Even going on about how the different apple types make the cider taste different. As she finishes talking about red delicious apples we end up in front of the hotel. When Applejack sees this she goes red “Oh wow, I’m sorry Flame. I didn’t mean ta talk yer ear off.” I give her a quick kiss on the cheek “Don’t worry about it. I enjoy chatting with you, no matter the subject.” However I think my kiss broke her. Applejack just turns a deep red and is staring straight forward. “Uh Applejack, are you okay?” I wave my hoof in front of her face “Hello? OW!” She had just slapped my hoof away “Sorry bout that Flame. What happened?” I rub my hoof against the back of my neck “Well I gave you a kiss on your cheek then you turned crimson and just stared ahead. Lost in thought?” “Yeah, I was just thinking about us. It wasn’t that long ago ah wanted nothing more than ta kick ya outa my life. But now here we are, together as a couple. Happily chatting as we walk through Dappleshore.” Now we’re heading up to the room “Believe me AJ I understand. For the longest time I thought you’d always be angry at me. To be honest, before I knew it I found myself caring more about how you view me. I’m not sure when it happened though, I think it was on the trip to Stalliongrad, right around the second week.” “Ah might as well come clean as well. I wanted to be mad at ya fer a long time. It wasn’t until I saw ya workin at the smithy that I really got over it. Ah couldn’t stay mad at such a hard workin pony. During the first week of the trip to Stalliongrad ah was interested, but ah was afraid ya’d turn me down after how ah treated ya.” We enter our room “Wait a minute, you mean to tell me that we could have been together sooner? What the hay is wrong with me to not notice!” At this I grab my head in shame. Applejack pulls my hooves down “But ya know, the way ya asked me out after the fight was good timin.” She smirks and gets closer “Even if Ah didn’t like ya, Ah wouldn’ta been able ta say no after that.” And with that she catches me off guard and gives me a full on kiss. At first I’m too stunned to do anything. She then pulls away, sits on the bed, and pouts “Well I guess yer just not interested.” I snap out of it “Oh the hay with that.” Now I launch at her and kiss her. She must have been ready for it as she reciprocates right away. We spend the next hour making out and cuddling before going to bed. The next morning I’ve got my head in the clouds. Absolutely nothing could ruin my day! As Applejack and I reach the breakfast buffet the other girls notice my bliss. Pinkie says with a smile “Well somepony’s in a good mood. Did something happen you two?” Looking at Applejack she also seems to not fully be there. We both shake our heads furiously. “AH HA! Something did happen! Come on you two, let’s hear it! What happened?!” At this the girls are all leaning in close, waiting for the answer. After a long pause, Applejack is the first to break the silence “Well…a…Flame and I…might have…kissed.” The group of girl’s jaws drops. Applejack just digs her head into my neck as I say “You girls should see the look on your faces! I wish I had a camera right now.” And I reciprocate the nuzzling. Slowly the girls snap out of it and continue eating. I whisper to Applejack “I’m worried; their current reaction to what happened is weird. I wouldn’t be surprised if they bring it up later begging for 'The truth'.” She whispers back “I know Flame, it’ll probably happen Pinkie style, most likely while we’re traveling so you won’t interfere.” After breakfast Twilight brings us all together “So, are we all finished with our business here?” We all verbally agree and Twilight continues “Then we should move on, should we continue north or turn south?” I speak up “I vote for continuing north, that’s where the trader with the new steel came from. And the next place going north is Derbyshire, I hear they have a strong racing tradition there.” Of course this catches both Rainbow Dash’s and Applejack’s attention as they immediately vote to head to Derbyshire. Fluttershy and Twilight seems to be fine with wherever we go. Rarity, to my surprise, also wants to visit Derbyshire. I don’t know why but I don’t question it. It takes 30 minutes for us to gather our things and get to the train station. While waiting at the station Twilight, Applejack, and Rarity are all going over ways for me to try to stay conscious this time as the train ride will take a full day. As the train arrives at the station, I try to calm myself down. I walk onto the train, find my seat, and keep trying to stay conscious. To my surprise I do manage to not pass out, but I’m very fidgety. Every sound the train makes has my fur on end. Applejack is right beside me trying to help me out the entire time. As night comes I nervously walk to the bed, crawl in, and I’m out cold the moment my head hits the pillow. My dream: I’m sitting in the train. Looking around all the girls are on the train with me. Everything is going smoothly and we’re on our way to Fillydelphia. Then the train violently rocks back and forth. This makes all of us tumble around, forcing us into compromising positions with each other. Now the train crashes causing a huge wreck. When I come to, I don’t see anypony else but I see a long line of wrecked cars. Trying to find any sign of life I search along the wreckage. I find nopony, but I find lots of blood all over the place. As I approach the last car I see an orange hoof sticking out from under the car, with blood seeping out. I just sit there and cry. All of my friends are dead, the one pony I could connect with, dead. I snap out of the dream sitting straight up screaming “APPLEJACK NO!” I had woken every pony in the compartment, the girls included. Fluttershy runs over “What happened Flame? Is everything alright?” I put a shaky hoof to my face and feel damp spots. Breathing out I respond as the girls gather around me “Yes I’m alright, it was just a dream, a very nasty dream.” T Twilight looks very worried again “What did you dream about? Was it a train wreck?” I nod slowly “Yes Twilight I dreamed of a train wreck. But in this train wreck, all of you died. The only one I could find was Applejack, and that was only her hoof. I’m sorry I woke you. I’ll get up now.” Applejack puts a hoof on my chest and pushes me back into bed “No, it’s barely midnight and you need sleep.” Crawling into my bed she says “And I’m gonna sleep right here. Everything will be alright Flame. It was just a dream, dreams pass, but I’m not going anywhere.” I pull Applejack in close and lay my head back down. Maybe, knowing she’s safe in my forelegs, I’ll be able to sleep on this Celestia forsaken train. This time I can’t remember my dream, but I wake to Applejack stirring. Its sunrise, which means we’re only 2 hours out. I’m still nervous so I lay my head back down and relax. I know I should get up, but I don’t want to wake Applejack. About ten minutes later, Applejack decides to get up so I follow suit. The rest of the train ride I do nothing but sit down and squeeze Applejack’s hoof. I need to know that my dream won’t come true. I need to know that my friends won’t just disappear on me. Finally the train stops, and we head into town. I feel like a basket case, my head swimming with the grim images from my dream. A few times I have to sit down, the images threatening to pull me out of consciousness. All these images, playing in my head, I feel…wrong. Like something’s not right, that something terrible will happen. 20 minutes into our walk the girls sit me down and huddle together. At this point I wish I knew what they were saying, but I can only hear the sounds of twisting metal, combined with bones snapping and flesh grinding into paste. And the worst sound of all, is the slow drip of blood on the ground. It just drips, monotonous, slow, and almost deliberate. I don’t see Derbyshire, but mangled bodies and the repeated motions of train cars twisting, crushing, killing the passengers inside. I’m vaguely aware that I’m walking, where too I don’t know. But this…madness…feels like it continues forever. Stuck in some messed up loop, unable to escape these sights or sounds. Eventually I slowly feel myself slipping back into reality. But when I come back, I’m in a softly colored room, wearing a patient’s gown, surrounded by the girls, two nurses, and a doctor. Nervously I say “Uh…how did I get here? Last thing I remember was disembarking the train and walking into town…then…I’m here.” Obviously I’m hiding what happened. I don’t want them, especially Applejack, to know of these…images. The girls all look at each other, like they didn’t know how to explain something, then Rainbow speaks up “Flame…you…you collapsed…In the middle of the street…and you…” Rainbow looks to the other girls for help but gets none. My eyes widen in horror “I talked…didn’t I? About...strange yet…horrible things.” At this Twilight speaks up “No, you just repeated ‘Why did they have to die?’ over and over again.” I breathe a sigh of relief; they do not need to hear of what I saw. Then I hear Applejack “That’s not quite all ya said. You also said ‘No! Applejack! Why? Why did you take her?’ We got ya to the local hospital quick. After that Doctor Scans tried to usher us out until you started coming to. We refused to leave ya Flame. I refused.” At this Doctor Scans says “I believe you had a flare up of post-traumatic stress disorder or PTSD for short. I believe your friends said you almost died in a train accident as a foal. That would certainly be cause for PTSD. For now I recommend you rest, and stay away from trains. If you try to combat this too quickly, it could permanently scar you. You’re free to leave whenever your ready.” With that Doctor Scans leaves the room as do the nurses. The room is completely silent. No pony wanting to talk. Quietly I say “I’m sorry girls. I…” Applejack cuts me off “Ya don’t have ta apologize. In fact we should be the ones apologizin. We shoulda taken what happened on the ride to Dappleshore as a warnin. Then we forced you to go on a much longer train ride.” I shake my head “No, you girls don’t have to apologize for anything. It was my choice to get on those trains. I’ll just have to be more careful for now on so I don’t trigger it again. How long have I been here?” Rarity says “A few days dear. A few of us left at times to take care of a few errands. But Applejack refused to leave your side. While I don’t know of everything you said, she sat there through it all.” I look right at Applejack “I’m sorry for worrying you, all of you. But I’m fine now. Let’s get outta this hospital.” We leave the hospital and its night out. Despite being out cold for a few days, I’m exhausted. We get our rooms and settle in for the night. Alone with Applejack I ask “I didn’t just say two phrases, did I Applejack? (she shakes her head) It was like I thought, I said horrible things, didn’t I?” She nods with pained sadness “At first, it was jus words. But soon the words came together ta form terrifyin pictures.” I can see her shaking. “It scared me Flame. Ah got a small glimpse of what ya saw. And ah hope ah never see it again.” I grab Applejack and hold her close to me “I hope you never see it again as well Aj. I really do. I was hoping…you’d never get a glimpse of my nightmare. The images and sounds in my head, they should never have gotten loose. I’m sorry Applejack. I’m so sorry.” At this point, Applejack and I get into bed and try to sleep. But I can tell that what she’s heard has disturbed her. And I feel there’s nothing I can do for her. So I simply hold her tight and don’t let go. I guess I’m hoping that she’ll feel safe in my grasp. I fall asleep whispering “I’m sorry Applejack. I’m so sorry.”