//------------------------------// // Bonus#2: Happy Ending // Story: Ex-Wonderbolts new job // by Jetto //------------------------------// Merry Weather swallowed, then carefully pushed the door, opening it with a deafening screech which resounded over the entire mansion. She cursed at herself. All plans she had for remaining hidden just went down to toilet. If there was ever a time to run away and leave the mysterious property alone, this stupid door just destroyed it completely. "Unless, you know... you teleport? Sheesh, unicorns..." Without any other options, she took a deep breath and bravely took charge forward, much too scared to think of anything better to do. Alone, helpless, but determined to finally solve the mystery that plagued her clan for centuries, she entered the dark room. "Student of magical arts but can't cast a light spell? I know kindergarteners smarter than her. Who wrote this crap?" Flitter was about to flip the book open and look around for an author name so she could later rant on about it to her friends. Considering her job was the most boring, soul draining activity she knew to ponykind (at least it paid well), she had to find something, anything, to talk to during casual small talk, but regretted choosing mainstream young-adult adventure literature. For every clever idea and funny moment, there was a plot hole big enough she'd fall down and die if she couldn't fly. To be fair, main pegasi heroes of this story probably wouldn't remember to flap their wings if they ever fell down the pit. On that note, who named a unicorn "Merry Weather"? That's the most pegasi name she ever heard of. She sighed. Only three chapters more, no point in stopping now. At least the next book she got sounded a bit more promising. "Dusk" was apparently a hit among teenagers and it was cited to be a "different take on bat ponies". Whatever that meant, it has to be better than this crap she just read. Her inner rants had to cut short when the door opened and her fillyfriend and that other guy she mostly tolerated appeared. "Well... that went well, I guess." Soarin admitted. "Pretty much, I guess." Cloud Chaser nodded. Flitter raised an eyebrow looking at the two. Their manes was even messier than usual, which is a feat in itself. They usually didn't house a bunch of twigs and leaves in between the strands of hair and she could swear she heard a chirping from either one of them. Their coats were no less messed up, as the two were covered in dust, bruises and even some band-aids. "Oh-kay..." she started "...can anypony explain to me what happened to the two of you?" Soarin and Cloud Chaser stood nervously in one place. They exchanged the looks, wordlessly communicating with each other using the power of their friendship to form a proper cover story that would explain, yet obscure, the events of few hours ago, which was a Friday night after they went to stalk Bulk Biceps and his date, with help of Lyra and Poindexter. Their adventures were a thing of legends, but without some serious editing were not ready to be published and shared with the world. Eventually, they settled on a simple, yet brilliant solution which made them proud for years to come. "You don't want to know.” "Probably not." Flitter rolled her eyes and turned away. Meanwhile, Cloud Chaser and Soarin used the moment of Flitter's distraction to bump hooves. Plan worked perfectly and he didn't have to tell a single lie. "Just confirm some things so I can stop worrying," Flitter once again turned to the messy pair "You didn't break anything?" "No." "You didn't stalk any helpless, innocent mares?" "...no." in their defense, they were stalking Bulk. And his date was hardly innocent or helpless. "You didn't impregnate any random mare on the way here?" “No I didn't!” answered Cloud Chaser, earning an irate eye roll from her fillyfriend. Soarin rolled his eyes at that question. As if he heard Hellfire again. Hellfire being a nickname to Spitfire whenever she cuts all the crap and starts being serious and slightly less cute. "No, I didn't. That would require me to actually bang somepony, which I swear didn't happen past two weeks." Chirp. All sounds suddenly stopped, aside from occasional chirping. Flitter blinked and so did Cloud Chaser, both glaring at Soarin wide-eyed. "Wh...what do you mean, didn't bang..." started Flitter, but stuttered, unable to finish the sentence. "In two weeks?" Cloud Chaser thankfully finished her sentence instead "But, that's what you told me two weeks ago!" Chirpchirp! "I did?" he raised a hoof to his chin and thought "Huh, I really did. Ever since that day Flitter lashed out on me for the rent, I've been either too depressed (I got over it), stressed, busy or tired and I completely lost track of when the last time was. Huh, ironic, isn't it? I've been helping other ponies get some, that I didn't got any myself! Funny," he chuckled "I always imagined I'd die from abstaining that long, yet here I am, barely noticing!" Chirpchirpchirp. "What in the world is that sound?" Soarin asked and turned around, until he eventually turned his eyes up and noticed something moving atop his head. He smiled at the sight of a little, yellow feathery fellow that was stuck in his mess of a hair "Why hello there, little buddy! How long have you been there?" "Chirp!" "Well, I guess I should go get you back to you mommy now, am I?" "Chirp!" "Then there's no time to lose!" he set his hooves towards the door, not even taking time to turn to his roommates "I'll be back in a jiffy, just gotta get Little S home before his mother gets worried." "Chirp!" "You see that, girls? He likes his new name!" he opened the door and extended his wings "Grab my hair tight, Little S, it's time for..." he flew out of his home "...adventure!" and before you can say 'there's a chick in you mane', he was gone, leaving his two dumbfounded roommates alone. As absurd as a grown-up stallion with a chic in his mane looking for adventure was, neither registered last several seconds, both being much too busy standing where they were, mouths agape and eyes wide. "F-four weeks...?" Cloud Chaser muttered "...how is he... but... that's..." "Damn," Flitter lamented, as she sat down, defeated "now I can't call him a 'perverted sex maniac' anymore! Four weeks! How is he still sane, no, scratch that, how is he still ALIVE?" The entire image of a stallion crumbled before Flitter's mind. No longer was she allowed to treat him like a scum and villain she suspected he was. That alone made her sick. "Flitty," Cloud Chaser turned to her marefriend and looked her deep into the eyes "this is all our fault!" "N-no way, he did this to himself. I mean, when did I said he should stop... being?" "You heard him right. Ever since that fateful day all he ever did, was make sure we'll be fine." "Yeah, but still..." "And he did that by earning money helping even more ponies!" "I know, but..." "At the expense of himself!" "I KNOW!" Flitter finally busted with tears and fell on the ground, covering her eyes with her hooves in defeat. The sole idea of her life depending on some stallion was detestable on itself. If she wanted to be cared for by a male, she wouldn't have fallen in love with Cloud Chaser and just got married to some generic guy, but she didn't. The only reason she tolerated Soarin's existence, was because he was a sleazy, perverted creature, with his bits being the only redeeming quality. Now that he turned out to be a, and she felt sick admitting it, nice guy, she couldn't hate him anymore. Which meant that she actually liked him. "Flitter," Cloud Chaser put both hooves on her fillyfriend and looked her in the eyes "we can fix this. And we both know exactly what we need to do!" It didn't take a genius or even a love-related telepathic link they sometimes shared. Flitter knew exactly what that meant. "I'm not gonna like this." "No sweetheart," Cloud Chaser smiled and winked "you're gonna LOVE it!" "...probably." "Honeys, I'm home!" Soarin loudly proclaimed as he once again went through the door, having a feeling of deja vu. "In the bathroom!" answered Cloud Chaser "Your bath's ready, come and get it!" Soarin's ears perked. He lived here for well over a month but it was the first time they prepared a bath for him. As great as his adventure of finding Little S's home was, he didn't have time to clean himself of the mess from today’s escapades and it was getting late. He realized in a hindsight that Little S is a stupid name for a bird, but it stuck and the two already bonded, as short as it was. He'll miss the little fellow. Shaking the thoughts of his little friend away, he trotted towards the bathroom. He was looking forward to finally cleaning himself up after a long, busy day. He wasn't quite sure why Cloud Chaser decided to make him a bath, but hey, what are friends for? Next thing he knows, she'll add some extra bonus and treat him extra nicely, like he deserves for being the best boss ever (her words, not his). That was of course just a wishful thinking. After all, she was super loyal to Flitter, and while she was known to ogle mares and had episodes with some stallions back in the day, there wasn't a force strong enough to make her cheat on her fillyfriend. Unless Flitter either gave her a permission (after Tartarus freezes, obviously), or if she joined in herself, which was just as desirable, as it was impossible. He sighed at the memory of some good times and one of the best days he ever experienced. Aside from Nightmare Moon, Spitfire turning to stone, venturing to Everfree and almost dying to a manticore, ghost and pony-eating plant monster, but who counted? He opened the door to the bathroom and noticed exactly what he expected to see- a bathtub full of steaming hot water, with bubbles no less. He walked closed to it and looked around for soap and sponge, but he couldn't find it in places they usually kept them. He was so busy looking for them he didn't hear or notice somepony walk up to him, until he felt something touch his back. His immediate reaction was almost jumping up and raising his wings, but as the brushing on his back intensified, he slowly relaxed and sat down. "Mhmm, that's the spot," he murmured with pleasure as the brush now reached his wings and delicately preened them with liquid soap "does Flitter know what you're doing, Cloud Chaser?" "Yeah, she probably does" answered his lovely secretary, as she appeared right in front of him, rubbing some soap into her hooves. Soarin's jaw fell flat, while massaging did not stop. He slowly turned his head back to notice a face full of blush redder than strawberry special muffin "F-flitter? "F-for the record, it was her idea!" Flitter said, avoiding direct eye contact, but still tending his now much cleaner wings. He was fully expecting her to say something like 'it's not that I like you, but...' stuff often read about. Even if she did said anything along those lines, he couldn't concentrate on her when Cloud Chaser closed in to him and started rubbing his other wing and body with her entire body. His wings, among other things, were getting stiffer and harder to control. "S-so, do we... you know..." he asked, confused, alternating his eyes from left and right, expecting to wake up anytime soon. "No, we just like washing our roommates," Flitter deadpanned, rolling her eyes "what do you think?" Whatever he tried to say, he couldn't, as he moaned loudly. In most situations, if a hoof went over a certain regions of a body it would be considered a crime. This was not one of those situations. He smiled widely and rose his head, thanking whatever deities there were. It really seemed like a dream come true. Dream... "By any chance, you didn't invite Pinkie Pie?" he asked the two. Immediately, any advances halted as both mares looked at each other and shrugged. "Why Pinkie, of all ponies?" "...no reason." The rest was, you guessed it, legen--