//------------------------------//
// 7: Alias 
// Story: An Equestrian Princess in New York 
// by Tallinu 
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	7: Alias

With my laptop and accessories in its travel bag tucked under one arm, the strap over my opposite shoulder, and the packed overnight bag in hand, I stepped back out into the rest of my apartment. I had all the things I’d need for a week or two away from home, but we’d have to pick up any feminine necessities Twilight needed. Come to think of it, I had no idea what sort of ‘necessities’ a pony princess would require. I hoped there wouldn’t be anything too out of the ordinary, but I decided I’d better just ask her instead of letting my imagination run away with me. As it turns out, I saved myself a lot of worry by doing so.
“Oh, don’t worry about anything like that. I’m perfectly capable of ‘roughing it’ for a while. And I did bring a few things along in my saddlebags, like a good brush for my mane, a comb, toothbrush, hoof-trimmer, and wing-care supplies. Hmm, I suppose if I get too dirty I’ll need some shampoo for a bath. I doubt the solid soap I saw in your bathroom would work very well on my coat, and that foamy shampoo in there doesn’t seem suitable at all.”
“Foamy… shampoo? From the black bottle, comes out when you press on the spout?” She nodded, and I smirked. “That was shaving cream, Twilight. For my face.”
Her eyes widened, and she put down the cup of yogurt she’d been eating from before I interrupted to come have a closer look at me. She was using a spoon, and not spilling any despite using no magic that I could see, which was impressive for never having hands before.
“You shave all the fur off your faces? What — No, you have eyebrows, and I saw some with hairy…”
I laughed and rubbed the area where my beard and mustache grew, moving closer so she could get a good look. “Just this part. Males tend to have a lot of it, but it can get in the way and a lot of us prefer to remove it. It’s easier to keep clean and is often seen as a more professional appearance.”
“Oh, I see! I wonder if there’d be demand for something like a hair growth suppression spell…”
“You can…? Okay, forget I even started to ask that question. So you were checking out the bathroom?”
“Yes, I… figured out how to use the plumbing system. You were right, it would have been pretty awkward before. But I was curious how it worked, too, so I looked inside the tank. It’s a remarkably similar system to some of ours, for all that it’s shaped differently. And I was glad to see the soap by the sink.”
“I thought you said you couldn’t use the solid kind?”
“Oh, I didn’t. But it means your people have an understanding of how diseases spread and have taken steps to reduce the risk.”
I looked at her yogurt, which she had resumed eating. With a spoon. Both of which were held in hands that she claimed she hadn’t washed, right before talking about how important it was to do so. I was quite perplexed.
Twilight paused when she noticed me staring, and a few seconds later she grimaced in disgust. “Ew! Casey… No!” Her eyes glowed with a purple shimmer, and the yogurt and spoon did likewise, floating out of her hands. “I didn’t need to. I have a big advantage over you in that respect, remember?”
I winced and smacked my forehead. “Sorry, I’m an idiot. I guess your disguise is fooling even me!”
She laughed at that and went back to eating.
“But that reminds me,” I added as I pulled a slice of leftover ham and pineapple pizza out of the fridge and prepared to start munching on it. “I can’t go around calling you Twilight, much less Princess, or that disguise won’t be worth beans.”
“Hmm, that’s a good point. How about Evening Shine?” I shook my head. “Dawn Flash? Morning Star?”
“You can’t come up with an alias that’s unrelated to your real name?” I wasn’t even going to touch the last one she’d suggested.
“Sure, but where’s the fun in that?”
I snorted and rolled my eyes, both of us chuckling. “Anyway, those are lovely and all, but in this country we don’t generally use English words or phrases as names. At least not first n— Wait…” I grimaced. I was being an idiot again, and Twilight gave me a smug look. “Okay, how can I figure out what you’re actually saying instead of what it means?”
“Just focus on what your ears are actually hearing. Like, when I say Casey Miller, it should match up, but everything else won’t if you pay attention. The translator mildly suppresses the processing of my voice so that your mind can distinguish more easily between the unrecognized noises and the concepts it supplies, and so you won’t be confused by sounds that coincidentally form words you do recognize. But you should be able to easily override that effect.”
I’d begun to catch on right after she said my name. “Okay, I think I get it. I can see why you have it doing that, it is a little distracting, but… Try again, say some names.”
“Twilight Sparkle… Evening Shine…”
I held up a hand. “Okay, that sounds promising… ‘ti-sha-ne-loose’?”
“Ishanna Leuss”, Evening Shine, she repeated, the meanings starting to gather around the appropriate groups of sounds in my head. Magic like this could be an amazing tool for learning languages, I suspected.
“Ee-shahn-uh… Lu… Leuss…” The last bit reminded me of Doctor Seuss (the anglicized pronunciation, not the German). I pictured writing the name down. Ishanna Leuss. It would work. And a somewhat foreign-sounding name would go along with the inability to speak English.
“Alright, Ishanna it is!”
Twilight’s disguise dimpled adorably as she grinned. “Congratulations, you’re learning Equestrian!”
“Heh, thanks… I suppose it does qualify as ‘learning’, even if it is just two words.”
“You always have to start somewhere.”
We finished our snacks and I made a quick pit stop, then we took one last look around before gathering our bags and heading out the door. Twilight had reshaped her saddlebags into a purse — at least on the outside. It was bigger on the inside, with all the items she’d mentioned and a few she hadn’t, plus room to spare. At first it wouldn’t open for me, when I tried closing it and reopening it again, but then she gave my hand a tap. After that it opened easily. I didn’t ask, assuming it was some kind of magic lock and she’d given me a ‘key’.
Now we just had to dodge any reporters who might have figured out where I lived. We’d need the press soon enough, but we needed those who would give Twilight favorable publicity first, not just any schmuck with a camera chasing the next internet fad. So we took the elevator down to the ground floor and Twilight took the lead through the small lobby, watching for anyone who seemed more interested in who was coming and going from the building than they should be.
Looks clear to me, she sent back. Nobody standing around or looking this way, at least.
I followed, and was nearly to the door when I spotted a news van cruising past through the barred glass. I quickly ducked to one side, out of sight. “Great. Somebody’s quick on the uptake.”
“What now? I could try to disguise you temporarily…”
“Hmm. I’d rather not risk blowing your cover by having you spotted with me. I guess we’ll have to try that.”
“Right, give me just a moment.”
As she worked her magic, I kept an eye out for anyone coming into or out of the building. Our luck held, and she finished seconds before the door beeped and opened to admit a resident. I caught the door behind him and Twilight and I stepped out.
“Here goes nothing…”
“We’ll be fine.”
Says the one who’s been in this world a matter of hours, I silently replied.
“I trust you. Between my magic and your expertise, we can put our heads together and get the help we need to make sure everything works out.”
I wasn’t sure what kind of expertise she thought I had that would be useful in this situation. I was feeling rather out of my depth. “Thanks. I just hope I’m not really messing things up.”
The news van hadn’t found a place to park, but had paused to let two people out. They were headed toward the entrance, and we didn’t want to linger. Especially since they wouldn’t be able to get inside, and might try questioning us without even knowing who we were, just because we’d come out of the building. I tried to look disinterested as we turned away from them and headed off down the sidewalk. We’d turn the corner and then swing around the next block to head for the nearby subway entrance (one of the reasons I’d chosen this apartment).
I figured the best disguise we could hope for would be to look like your typical ‘stupid tourists’, and in Twilight’s case, that was at least half-true. She’d probably be entranced by the wonders of the big city enough for the both of us, and there were things we’d have to shop for anyway. We needed some kind of real clothes that would fit her, we needed to eat something more than the snacks we’d had at home and were carrying with us, and we needed a cheap but safe place to spend the night.
I was pondering whether dinner or clothes should come first when I realized I had not taken into account several important factors. We would be shopping for women’s clothes, not men’s. We were shopping for a female of a completely different species. And she had never worn human-style clothes in her life. I had no idea how long it would take for her to pick out appropriate garments in a size that fit her and that she could put on and take off without assistance (although with her magic I probably didn’t have to worry too much about that part). Food would definitely need to come first.
“That sandwich shop I mentioned is just a bit past the subway station. We can eat, then take a ride and find a clothing store… That reminds me. People around here are particularly sensitive to being stared at. And don’t look anyone in the eye.”
“Here, more than elsewhere?”
“Yeah. This city can get pretty crowded, especially on the subway, so folks are really attached to whatever scraps of privacy they can hold on to. That’s the way I see it, at least.”
“Interesting. I’ll do my best not to upset anyone.”
“Also, there are people who can be very dangerous… not a great many, fortunately, and I’ve lived here for years and never been mugged or anything… but it’s best to be cautious.”
Twilight nodded slowly. “Life is not always friendship and rainbows back home, either. We do our best to look out for everyone, but there are still some who manage to fall through the cracks, or have problems due to making poor decisions… It’s become a growing issue, as our population has increased more in recent decades than in most of our past.”
I wasn’t sure what to say to that, and we walked in silence for a while.