//------------------------------// // V - A Party For A New Hero // Story: My Little Sly Cooper: Thievery is Magic // by Deyeaz //------------------------------// My Little Sly Cooper: Thievery is Magic V - A Party For A New Hero "Will you please shut off that infernal racket?" Twilight pleaded, her eardrums on the verge of bleeding from Sly's hard rock music. He, she, and Spike had taken a rather time-consuming stroll around Ponyville after ensuring that Gilda was sent to an infirmary (Sly pickpocketed her while he was carrying her with Twilight and Spike when they weren't looking; he got a small pouch full of gold coins known as "Bits" from the griffin). They let Sly get familiar with his environment. He was a little astounded by every detail that he saw: the Town Hall, the mountain that held the royal city Canterlot, Pinkie's Sugarcube Corner, Rarity's Carousel Boutique, Fluttershy's treehouse-cottage, Applejack's Sweet Apple Acres, even the clouds that Rainbow Dash was pushing and kicking away like they were... well, clouds. "Well, don't blame me because you're not a fan of the music I like," he deadpanned without skipping a beat. He slipped his headphones back onto his head and cranked the volume up a little bit more, headbanging to Breaking Benjamin's "Blow Me Away". Spike could hear the rock music blaring from the thick plastic headphone cups and couldn't help but bang his head along with Sly, the latter glancing down at the former and suppressing a guffaw: Spike resembled one of those hardcore motor-babies back on Earth, except he was scaly and really was a baby. Even over the music blasting out across the vicinity - which caught many an eye from the residents of Ponyville - and Twilight's slightly frustrated groans, they could hear and feel their bellies growling in hunger, clearer than daylight. "Yyyyyeah, we're famished," Spike huffed, rubbing his scaly cream-colored abdomen. "Well, Sugarcube Corner is a couple of minutes from here," Twilight said reassuringly. "Maybe we could grab a pastry or something?" "Sure," Sly agreed as he removed his headphones and paused the song. He began to try and find the proper words to say next. "But maybe I can wait outside of the shop and stretch my limbs? I think I'm gonna need the exercise." "O-oh. Sure, Sly," The purple unicorn said in a downtrodden voice. She was really hoping that they could share a pastry between the two of them, maybe even a milkshake if she was quite lucky. Sly still saw through her upset manner through her seemingly-happy complexion and strode over to her. He gave her a sympathetic pat on her back and smiled at her. "Don't worry, Twi," he said reassuringly. "Now let's go get some sweets, eh?" He ended his sentence by pulling out the coin bag from his saddlebag and gave it a little shake. The Bits inside emitted a soft little jingle. "Sly?" Spike said nervously, eyeballing the Bits Bag. "Where'd you get those?" "Nicked 'em from that griffin broad," Sly answered casually. Twilight's jaw dropped, and Spike looked like he was about to collapse onto his librarian caretaker. "Sly! Don't you know it's illegal to steal from somepony?!" She wailed. More of the Ponyvilleans stared at the scene. Some temporarily paused at the scene, but they all just resumed with what they were doing and minded their own business. "First off, Twi, she's not a pony. She's some mythological creature that was sent from the blackest pits of Hell, or Tartarus, or whatever realm of despair and suffering you all believe bad ponies go when they kick the bucket to torture us into oblivion. Besides, did you see what she did to Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash?" "Good point, but still! Thievery's a serious crime here!" Twilight interrupted. She was scared for Sly. She was afraid that Princess Celestia would be informed of this and would have to send Sly into exile. It was nearly impossible for her to bare the separation. "What the f... my family is comprised of master raccoon thieves!" Sly was a little incredulous that her mare of a friend did not remember last night's conversation. "Ergo, it's not illegal... to me. Especially not when the victim is a criminal." "Whaddaya mean?" Twilight was curious as to how Gilda was a criminal. "I saw her Wanted Poster on the Bulletin Board while we were taking her to the hospital. She has a huge bounty on her head for transporting illicit drugs across the kingdom. 400 Bits for her lion arse in the slammer." Spike and Twilight gasped. Sly gave the Bit bag one more shake and continued with his little skit. "Besides, she won't be needing this where she's going." "Still, you could get into some serious trouble, Sly!" Spike said worriedly. He didn't want to see his new role model locked up behind bars in some godforsaken dungeon. "Don't worry about me, you guys," he assured them again as they finally reached the double doors of Sugarcube Corner. They pushed the doors ajar and stepped inside, only to be visited with an extremely rare and frightening scene. Three unicorns, a mare and two stallions all donned in black shirts, complete with black capes and black masks, were holding up old-fashioned musket pistols at the sweet shop owners: a short, plump, turquoise mare - who was named Mrs. Cake after Sly took a half-second glance at her name tag - with a stylishly done pink mane and tail, both adorned with a white stripe, and Pinkie Pie, whose own mane and tail had laid flat and straight, tears shining in her eyes and threatening to fully escape from their ducts. They were racked with apprehension. "Empty out your registers! NOW!" the scarlet mare in the middle shouted at the two defenseless ponies behind the counter. "Every single bucking Bit, got it?!" the green stallion on the right roared as he willed his pistol closer to the two mares. "Duhh... yeah! Do it!" said the gray unicorn robber on the left stupidly. "Sly!" Spike whispered to the master thief. "Do something! Quick!" "Got it!" Sly mouthed back to the dragon. He then glanced at Twilight; fear had struck her like an immense lightning bolt. He gave her a nod, gulped, and walked over to the three burglars. He tapped the gray one on his shoulder with his cane. "Huh? Hey, who'r-" *POW* The weakest link took Sly's weapon to the muzzle and was sent flying over the heads of Pinkie and Mrs. Cake, crashing into the wall and sliding down to the laminate tile floor of the bakery, unconscious. The remaining two burglars willed their pistols towards Sly and opened fire upon him. Twilight gasped as Sly dodged the bullets, but they were zooming towards her at a ferocious speed. She managed to raise up a force field with her magic before the balls of lead could leave a big hole in her cranium. Spike was hyperventilating and gritting his teeth, unsure whether to run away from the danger or to help Sly fight the bandits. Sly jumped over to the green stallion and twisted in midair. When he came down, he brought his hind leg down upon the burglar's head, which slammed onto the ground with a violent tremor. He was also out cold. Two morons down... one left, Sly mused wickedly. He whipped towards the red mare, who was backing away as Sly advanced. She hit the wall and began sinking onto her haunches, her eyes constricting with fear. "Please don't hurt me!" She cried, on the verge of bawling like some scared baby filly. Time to have a little bit of fun, the coon-pony thought to himself. He used the inner crook of his cane to bring her face so close to his that their eyes were almost millimeters from connecting. He breathed in heavily, glared at her menacingly and said one short, simple word. "Boo." The mare slumped to the floor, fainting from it all. Sly dug into his saddlebag and pulled out a coil of rope. In a matter of minutes, the three unconscious burglars were trussed up tighter than turkeys. "Jeez... what amateurs," Sly huffed as he tucked his cane back into his saddlebag strap and walked towards Mrs. Cake and Pinkie. "You ladies alright?" "Oh, yes, good sir. Thank you so much for stopping those crooks," Mrs. Cake said, grateful that her store didn't get decimated from the battle. "It was no prob- AGH!" He exclaimed. Pinkie, hair and tail reflating like some balloon gone haywire, had ran up to Sly at lightning-like speeds and tackled him in a massive hug. The force of the collision sent Sly and Pinkie tumbling to the floor. "Oh, thankyouthankyouthankyouTHANKYOU!" The all-pink party goer said rapidly, hugging Sly as tightly as she could. "Can't... breathe... let go!" The coon-pony muttered as he began flailing his arms. His face was near the shade of blue when Pinkie finally released him. Mrs. Cake, Twilight, and Spike were laughing raucously at Pinkie's actions. Twilight gave Sly a helping hoof and pulled him up off of the floor. As soon as he did, she wrapped her hooves around his neck and held on, her head resting on his shoulder as he returned the warm embrace. He couldn't help but smell the hypnotic scent of her mane. It reminded him off all the exotic berries he had come across on his adventures with Bentley and Murray. Oh, if only they were here.... "Kiss already, darn you!" Pinkie blurted out. She was obviously annoyed by the slow pace that the two were going at. She grabbed them by the back of their heads again, pulled them back so that Twilight's head wasn't on her crush's shoulder, and then pushed them against each other. Their lips made contact, alright. Sly could taste berries on her friend's mouth, and Twilight detected a faint taste of mint on his. They pulled away quickly after one second of their blissful connection, both of them embarrassed that others had seen it. They tried to look into each other eyes, yet turned away and blushed vigorously as they did so. "Well, that was... interesting," Twilight said, her cheeks searing the brightest of pinks. "Y-yeah," Sly said, his face burning bright as well. "D'awwwwwwww!" Pinkie squeaked at her forced attempt to incite love between the thief and the librarian. Suddenly, the hyperactive pink quadruped's eyes got wider as she was visited with asudden idea. "Say, you know what this calls for?!" "3... 2... 1..." Twilight, Spike, and Mrs. Cake counted down, like what Pinkie was about to announce was no surprise. "A PARTY!!!!!" Sly gulped nervously. "Please!" Sly groaned in discomfort as he painfully swallowed his 47th cupcake. "NO MORE!" The party - known as the "Welcome-To-Ponyville-Thank-You-For-Stopping-Those-Burglars-And-Good-Job-On-Making-Twilight-Your-Marefriend" party - was in full swing. The citizens of Ponyville knew about Pinkie's notorious parties, and couldn't pass up the opportunity to attend it and see who she was congratulating while they were at it. "Pfft. You lightweight!" Pinkie scoffed, downing her 184th cupcake like it was literally nothing. "Pinkie, cut it out. I can feel my organs shutting down one by one," the coon-pony reasoned, clutching his stomach in pain. He jokingly winced and said, "Whoop. Speak of the devil, there goes my liver." Everypony who heard Sly gave hearty chuckles all around. He was becoming quite the talk of the town: Lyra and Bon-Bon invited him over for tea tomorrow, Vinyl Scratch saw his rPod and nearly lost it when she saw the near 1700 songs on it, all of them ranging from hard rock and heavy metal to electronica, dubstep, and house (she really enjoyed Adventure Club's "Do I See Color"), the Mayor decided to give him a plaque in honor of displaying his heroism on four criminals in less than a day, Dr. Whooves was examining Sly's cane with curiosity of how it was so durable, Rarity had made Sly a new shirt, gloves, and a beret that were black and red instead of the usual blue and yellow, Applejack and Big Mac gave him a large apple pie, which Pinkie immediately consumed, and Applebloom and her friends Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle wanted to know how to get a Cutie Mark like his and if he could teach them how to get one. "In time, little fillies," he answered falsely. Only the Cooper Clan could get their emblem in a Cutie Mark if they were ponies, but he didn't want to disappoint anypony. He gave their three manes a friendly tousle; Scootaloo looked a little annoyed at his playful gesture, Sweetie Belle was a bit embarrassed, but didn't seem to mind too much, and Applebloom practically loved it. She wasn't as tall as Sly, so the top of her head only reached his chest as she stood on her hind legs and hugged Sly around the neck, her short forelegs barely reaching each other behind his head. "Thank ya so much, Sly! Yer one o' mah best friends, you know that?" she said with joy. Sly wrapped his foreleg around her back and returned the hug, a grin worming its way onto his face. "Hey!" Sweetie Belle squeaked in anger. "Ahem!" Scootaloo feign-cleared her throat, a little ticked off that Applebloom had possibly replaced them. "Well, y'all're still mah bestest friends!" Applebloom reassured the two fillies sheepishly as she shot them an unconvincing smile. Sly let go of her and let her play with her friends, who seemed content that the Earth Pony hadn't booted them to second place on the friends list. He was a little glad to unwind from all the havoc that unfurled before him in under thirty minutes. When suddenly... "CONGA LIIIIIIIIINE!!!" Pinkie screamed at the top of her lungs. The whole entire crowd cheered as they got into a massive single-file line, forehooves grabbing the side of flanks as an Xavier Cugat mambo song began resounding from a phonograph that Mr. Cake had pulled out of the kitchen. "Bum-bum-bum-bum-bum-HEY! Bum-bum-bum-bum-bum-HEY!..." Man... my hyperactive ancestor B.F. Cooper would've gotten a kick outta her, Sly mused as she viewed Pinkie leading the conga line. "She's a Sun Goddess, you know," said a familiar voice in his ear. Sly craned his neck and spotted Twilight, sitting on her haunches next to him as Mrs. Cake gave them a chocolate milkshake with two straws (Let's admit it, you all know why that is). "Who, Pinkie Pie? 'Cause if she is, I want off this world," Sly said apprehensively. He did not want to have to worship some jittery pink equine for as long as he lived. "No, silly! Princess Celestia!" Twilight chortled as she took a long draw from the milkshake. "Oh. Right." He remembered her mentioning Celestia earlier in the library during breakfast. He decided to give the milkshake a try. The creaminess of the ice cream on it, topped with the silky-smoothness of the dark chocolate milk and its sweetness was enough to make Sly become addicted to it. "She and her sister Princess Luna, the Moon Goddess, raise the sun and the moon every day and night." "Huh. I guess that explains why the day past by rather quickly." Twilight nodded. "Um... so, you wanna blow this popsicle stand?" Sly said suavely. Oh, how he loved those Western films he watched back in Paris. "Sure thing," she agreed gratefully: the occupants of Sugarcube Corner was dwindling, mainly because the party had been going on for about nine hours now. With Sly's athletic abilities, he let Twilight ride on his back - she gave a little girly shriek in shock as she was atop him - and he performed his Invisibility Technique that he picked up from his ancestor, Slytunkhamen Cooper. Twilight gasped in surprise as she went invisible as well. "How did you do that?" she questioned, curious how an Earth Pony could perform a feat of magic like that. "Learned it back home," he responded plainly. "Interesting." Twilight observed him closely as he pick up some of his presents and placed them in his saddlebag; she had to shift a little bit so that he could open the flap and stuff them in. They slipped out the door and climbed onto a roof top via a stack of crates. The party guest were none the wiser at the librarian and the master thief's disappearances. "Hold on tightly," Sly said as he deactivated the invisibility move, standing up on his hind legs. Twilight slid a little bit down his back, but he caught her before she could drag him down. He looked at the clotheslines and lampposts that stood before him and saw their unexplainable blue auras that only Master Raccoon Thieves could see. She wrapped her forelegs around her neck and looked over his shoulder. Her pupils constricted as she noticed the row of lampposts and clotheslines in front of them that snaked around the town and passing by the library. "Are you sure about this?" She asked nervously, squeezing the coon-pony's neck as tight as she could without asphyxiating him. "Trust me." Sly gave her a wink and leaped off of the rooftop and spun in the air. Twilight screamed in a mix of delight and fear as the two of them landed neatly upon the clothesline. He started running along it with the nimbleness of a ninja, jumping off at the end of the nylon rope and landing on a lamppost. He jumped off again and landed onto another rooftop, then onto a lamppost again, then on two clotheslines held together with a massive wooden beam, then onto more rooftops and then onto the last two lampposts before reaching the balcony of the library treehouse within a matter of seconds. "Whoo!" Twilight shrieked. Her mane was a little swept back from the light breeze, but the adrenaline rush she underwent was tremendous and spectacular. She got off of Sly's back and was shaking a little bit for that exhilarating experience. "Let's go again! Let's go again!" "Hold on there, Twi," he said as got back down on four hooves again. "A little bit of Pinkie is rubbing off on you, huh?" "Hehe... Sorry about that." "That's alright." He pushed the balcony door ajar. "Now... let's get some shut eye." "Hallelujah," she said. The two of them traipsed into their room and hit their beds almost immediately.