Alucard was sitting on the couch with his arm around Luna in her chambers and turned off his seventy inch plasma widescreen T.V with space Netflix after they saw Discord's new commercial.
"Wow. Discord is really scraping the bottom of the barrel." Alucard stated.
"Yes. He does seem pretty pathetic. Probably couldn't get a mare if he used his mind spell on them." Luna responded.
Alucard laughed at the jab towards Discords manhood...or whatever the fuck he was and responded. "Yeah, I'll take him on a guys trip here soon. Hmm, I might even take Spike. He seriously needs help."
Suddenly Luna lost all expression on her face and stared at Alucard intensely as a vision passed through her mind...Cause you know. She can do that stuff now.
"Uh. Luna? You're creeping me out. And I'm a fuckmothering vampire." Alucard said as Luna broke out in a sweat.
"Ally! We are in great danger! powerful beings are coming here they may also be selling some kind of soda! And they could be gay. Did I mention gay!"
"Yes. And it better be Dr. Pepper. I can't seem to get any real pop around here."
"Alucard, did you not hear me!? We're in danger!" Luna was desperate.
"Oh relax. I'll just kill whatever it is when it gets here." Alucard kept his chill attitude.
"I don't think you understand. They're stronger than you!"
If Alucard ever laughed hard at anything, this was it. A good twenty or so minutes passed as Alucard got his shit together and sat back down next to Luna.
"First." He started. "Good one. Second. Nothing's stronger then me. Except that guy that you see in Duralast commercials. I'll figure out his secret soon, and when I do." Alucard was clenching a fist.
Luna didn't care at this point and started writing a letter to which she would send as soon as it was finished.
Vegeta and Goku had split ways at this point. Goku said something about having a look around the planet and he'd be back as soon as possible. In the mean time however Vegeta was in Canterlot with Rainbow Dash searching for his one way ticket home named Discord.
"What a dick!" Vegeta yelled getting weird stares from all the noble ponies.
"It's Discord. He does this." Rainbow Dash said trying to be reassuring.
Before anything more could be said a letter materialized with a blue glow around it almost hitting Vegeta in the face. "Fucking letter!" He yelled as he grabbed the scroll and began to read it.
Dear Vegeta,
Don't ask how I know where you are. It's a thing. More importantly I must ask of your assistance. A group of extreme faggots are on the way to destroy us! Alucard's being an ass, but that's just Alucard. I need you to handle this.
Also where'd your friend go? I can't see him with my magic anymore. Oh well, we'll get to that later.
Sincerely,
Luna, Ruler of Equestria
"What a bitch." Vegeta said out loud. "Although. Extreme faggots sound familiar." Vegeta looked at Dash. "If I'm right. I'm about to look like the most badass thing that ever came to this planet."
Without another word Vegeta grabbed Rainbow Dash and flew to the Canterlot Palace as fast as he could. As quickly as he had taken off he landed letting Rainbow Dash collect herself on the ground. She had flown fast before but not that fast.
After a quick walk down a few halls and pushing over a few guards here and there he met Luna and Alucard looking through a tall glass window towards Ponyville.
"The fuck are you two staring at?" Vegeta asked.
"Come here Vegeta." Luna seemed worried as she stared towards the small town in the distance.
Five space pods came falling out of the sky and landed in what seemed to be the center of town.
All five pods opened showing four huge shadowy figures and one midget figure. As they jumped out of the cramped pods, stretched, then struck a gay pose, Jeice, who was a red looking fucker, stepped forward.
"Eh, Captain." Jeice said in his space australian accent.
"What is it Jeice?" Captain Ginyu asked as he appreciated team feedback.
"Is it just me or this place...colorful." Jeice was now rubbing an eye.
Ginyu looked around. "Yeah, it is. Be a pal and fix that will ya?"
"Say no more Cap." With that Jeice threw his arm into the air causing the surrounding area to sparkle and glow red.
"You can sit back on this one dead man. You can't handle these guys." Vegeta was cocky at best and was smiling at Alucard.
"You don't know me!" Alucard said in a retarded fashion.
Vegeta met this with a laugh. "Well, I'll be back. Gotta go stop the gay pride parade."
Alucard put his arm out in front of Vegeta and continued to stare at Ponyville. "Give it a sec."
With the groups eyes fixed on Ponyville a bright red flash overtook their vision. Surrounding Ponyville in a brilliant red aurora.
"Nailed it! Thank god too. I was going back there tomorrow." Alucard continued to stare only now at a crater rather than a small town.
"Uhh..." Vegeta stammered. "How many, uh, inhabitants were down there?"
"Three thousand!" Luna yelled thinking heavily of the lost lives.
"Nah." Rainbow Dash said as she caught up with the group. "Noponies down there today."
"Why?" Vegeta was first to ask the nagging question.
"It's national no Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon Day." After Rainbow's explanation the three only responded with confused looks. "You know, it's where everyone leaves Ponyville for the day and doesn't tell Diamond and Silver about it."
"That's fucking great!" Alucard yelled.
Luna was next. "But those two are dead. Don't they know that?"
"Well yeah, but those ponies will take any excuse to go party."
"That's fucked." Vegeta said then readjusted his sight to the crater. "Oh well, at least nothing can get in my way!" With this, Vegeta jumped out the window and high tailed it down to Ponyville. Or at least, what was left of it.
"Okay men." Ginyu started. "This world's easy pickins. We've left our mark here and now it's time to extinguish the rest of the life on this pathetic-" Ginyu stopped himself as he heard a faint call that echoed through the air.
"Mine. Mine. Mine! Mine! Mine!"
Suddenly a white boot made contact with Ginyu's face throwing him into the distance.
"Mine." Vegeta said as he stared at the four left behind who were somewhat confused.
"Vegeta?" Jeice asked.
"Who else?" Vegeta replied.
"Well mate, sorry you came this far out just to die." Jeice replied.
"Bitch please." As fast as Vegeta said this he vaporized Jeice.
"Holy shit he got Jeice!" Burter yelled.
"Sorry, did I just kill your boyfriend?" Vegeta asked.
"No. But he was close."
And with this Vegeta slaughtered them all. The writer however was too lazy to write it all out. Kind of a big middle finger isn't it?
Vegeta returned to Canterlot and laughed in Alucards face. He didn't even have to go Super Saiyan. But did anyone give a fuck? Nope. Anyways, after a couple hours passed the citizens of Ponyville returned to their town. Only to find that it was completely destroyed...again. What is that, like the third time now?
"Son of bitch!" Twilight yelled looking around at the charred books on the ground. "I bet it was fucking Alucard! What a dick!"
And with that, the town set back to work on fixing the damage. It would look no different tomorrow then it usually does. That construction crew is really talented. Someone better look into those guys before I start calling hacks.