Pon-ni Muyo
Chapter One: No Need For Pon-nies
Twilight Sparkle’s head slammed down on the lab table below her, hard. “It doesn’t make sense. The mare warps the laws of physics and magic alike.” She turned a frustrated glare toward the mare in question strapped her examination table. At least she had been strapped to the table, yet now she was not. “Please tell me I got data on that at least.”
“Data for what?” Pinkie Pie suddenly appeared, seemingly from nowhere, beside the computer read out that Twilight had been using. “Oh! Is this the new game staring Princess Luna? I heard it was awesome!”
“Pinkie wait!” Twilight reached out a hoof, but it was to late. “Pony feathers…” Electrical based magic began to crackle around the monitor and smoke began to pour from the poor device as Pinkie Pie began to randomly mash buttons.
Above Ponyville, Rainbow Dash lay on the last cloud in the sky. “I could really go for a cupcake right now, but this cloud is so comfy.” She half moaned as she stretched out along the fluffy nimbus. “I wonder if…” The cloud suddenly jolted as a shockwave of energy slammed into it from below, knocking Rainbow off of her perch.
“PINKIE!”
Righting herself in her fall Rainbow Dash began to laugh as she watched Twilight Sparkle, egghead supreme, chase the bouncy party pony through the streets of Ponyville with a broom. “She should give it up. She’s never going figure out how Pinkie does the things she does.” Taking her time for once, she lazily floated down to the streets below to sit beside the library and watch the mayhem unfold. Before long a second pony was sitting beside her.
“Experiment gone wrong?” Applejack asked as she watched Pinkie effortlessly dodge her way through Twilight’s broom attacks.
“Probably.” Rainbow Dash agreed. “Pinkie Sense?”
“Nah, think that was last week.” Applejack brought her hoof to her chin in thought. “Random pop-up for violating a Pinkie Promise?”
“Maybe.” Rainbow crossed her forelegs over her chest. “She hasn’t done that one in a while.”
“My bits are on the amount of damage that never seems to accumulate on Pinkie.” Rarity walked up slowly, drawn by the smoke billowing into the air above the Golden Oaks library. “Think about it, she’s always being thrown around in one way or another yet she never gets hurt.”
“I think that’s because she’s part bouncy ball.” Applejack grinned. “Something to do with that pink color.
“Pink color?” Squeaked a voice from slightly above them.
“Not you Fluttershy.” Rainbow Dash assured her with a welcoming wave. “We’re taking bets on what experiment Twilight was running on Pinkie this time.”
“Oh, I do wish she’d stop that.” Fluttershy landed beside her friends. “One of these days she’s going to hurt some pony.”
“Ten bits says it won’t be Pinkie Pie!” Rainbow Dash threw up a hoof. “Any takers?” She sat back with a grumpy look on her face when no pony spoke up. “You guys are boring.”
“You make a bet when there is a chance of a different outcome sugar cube.” Applejack shoved the pegasus playfully. “Not when it’s a lock.”
“Get back here!”
“As amusing as all this is,” Began Rarity. “Shouldn’t we put a stop to this? They are causing a rather dreadful scene.”
“Oh no.” Applejack dug her hooves into the dirt. “Remember last time? The Zap Apple Jam Fiasco?”
Rainbow shivered. “My head got sent into a wall, then through it, when I tried to break them up one time. I didn’t even think that was possible.”
“Poor Angel Bunny got zapped by a stray spell the time before that.” Fluttershy recalled. “He couldn’t stop bouncing for a week, the poor little thing. I had to follow him constantly with food and water until the spell finally wore off.”
“Well if some pony could do something I’d really appreciate it.” Spike grumbled as he exited the library, his face and claws covered in soot. “I’m the one who’s going to get stuck cleaning all this up you know.”
The girls at least had the decency to look a bit guilty at that. “All right, all right.” Applejack finally rose from her seat. “Come every pony, let’s get this done.”
Rainbow Dash sighed as she lifted herself off the ground with a flap of her wings. “I’ll get Pinkie.” Her face was rather dour looking as she flew forward without enthusiasm. “Again.”
“I…I’ll help Rainbow.” Fluttershy floated along after her friend. “Maybe this time will be easier. We are getting more experienced after all.”
“I’m not so sure if that’s a good or a bad thing.” Rarity walked beside Applejack. “Shall we flip a bit like last time?”
“It’s going to hurt either way.” Applejack pulled her stetson down a little. “What do you want, high or low?”
“It’s not much, but my magic gives me a little boost when I go high.” Rarity spread her limbs in a racer’s stance. “On three?”
Applejack prepped herself to run as well. “Wish I had my lasso.” Grumbling she clopped her hoof on the ground. “One…”
“Two…” Rarity took a deep breath.
“Three!” They yelled together and charged after Twilight Sparkle.
Spike watched from the sidelines, his eye twitching as events beyond his control began to unfold. Rainbow Dash flew too low and received a, somehow, overpowered headbutt as Pinkie randomly changed direction. He turned tiredly as he heard Rarity yell in distaste as she got a mouthful of broom hay. Spike wondered absently when he’d last used that broom, or cleaned it’s bristles. The dragon cringed slightly, but not overly much, as Fluttershy took a telekinetic blast to her belly sending her tumbling through the air into a nearby fruit cart. He used to feel really bad about that sort of thing, but it happened with such regularity now that the mare didn’t even get injured and only served to fuel his ire. His clawed paw massaged the space between his eyes as he saw Applejack get bucked back like one of her apples when Twilight tried to change direction after Pinkie Pie. “I can’t do this any more.”
Walking slowly forward his expression slowly changed from one of apathy to one of anger. “That’s enough.” His voice was lost in the din going on around him. He stood at the rough center of the commotion going on, his claws balled into tiny fists at his side. “Do you girls hear me!” Spike roared with all his might, seemingly tapping some draconian reserve he did not know he possessed. “I said that’s enough!” The shockwave of his voice sent the ponies tumbling, surprising every pony in the vicinity. The sudden tumble distracted both of the magic wielding ponies in their entourage, causing the spell blasts to rocket towards Spike. “Of course.” He shrugged, not even bothering to try and get away.
At that moment a feeling began to rise in Spike’s gut, familiar to say the least, but he cursed the timing. The dragon belched flame to deliver the letter sent by Celestia, and that was when the world came to a crashing halt. Both Rarity’s and Twilight’s spell hit the dragon full in the mouth just as the dimensional gate used for letter delivery was opening. Time stood still for a brief second, and then the gateway collapsed inward. Unable to move Spike simply watched as brilliant, multicolored, rainbow lights expelled from his mouth. It didn’t take long before he was entirely engulfed in the strange light. One by one the others appeared around him, equally frozen in place, followed by the buildings of Ponyville and their tenants. The thoughts of how much clean up this explosion was going to take ran through Spike’s mind, though it was a question that would have to wait.
Twilight Sparkle gasped as she found herself suddenly falling into frigidly cold water, an action that did not sit well with her lungs. Coughing and sputtering her way to the surface she paddled for all she was worth. “S-Spike!”
“Twilight! Help!”
The alicorn tried to use her wings, but the added water weight made them to heavy to aid her. With her mind clouded in panic she couldn’t focus enough for magic to aid her either. Blinking away the water as best she could she spotted a mass of purple and green and put all efforts into reaching it. “I’ve got you Spike, I’ve got you!” Diving below him she surfaced with her long time friend on her back. There was something off about his body, but she couldn’t quite place it nor did she care at the moment.
Spotting a construct in the distance she swam towards it using every last ounce of strength she had to keep them both above water. Long minutes later she pulled herself up onto the wooden dock and collapsed upon it, her breathing long and labored. “S-spike?”
“I-I think I’m ok.”
Twilight smiled despite the weak reply, glad to hear her friend was safe. She started to roll over, but stopped as a high pitched whine cut through the air. She slammed her head back as two beams of energy suddenly materialized into place over her face. Her first thought was magic as the red lance and blue lance of power hovered over her nose, but the feel was off. There was no denying they were powerful though, that much she was quite certain of. The alicorn princess tried to turn her head to look up at the wielders of this strange magic, but the red lance edge closer.
“No funny moves stranger.”
Twilight simply nodded, wondering what trouble they’d landed in this time.