//------------------------------//
// Taste the sun 
// Story: Mr. Torgue's Campaign of Ponies 
// by Burlacious Soldier 
//------------------------------//

	The ground shook from the sheer collective force of several jaws dropping. For their part, though, the room's newest occupants had the lightest reaction, merely blinking in surprise. Torgue glanced around at the ponies surrounding him, genuinely confused at their reactions. After several moments of awkward silence, the large white one coughed and began to speak.
"Well, I... uh... I don't know what to say." the white one stammered, a slightly bewildered look on its face.
"I agree, sister. His manner is... most unbecoming." the dark blue one eyed Torgue warily.
This time Torgue's jaw dropped, "Unbecoming?! That was a compliment! How the f*BLEEP* was that unbecoming?!"
About this time, the rest of the room overcame the shock of Mister Torgue's words from earlier. A rather ticked Twilight looked as if she were about to yell at Torgue if Shining Armor hadn't stepped up and gestured for Torgue to follow him.
"How about you girls talk with the princesses about Torgue while he and I go have a word for a moment?" Shining opened the door to the hallway and beckoned to Torgue once more.
Torgue looked as if he wanted to argue but he gave up, deciding only wussies would argue, and followed Shining. Once in the hallway, Torgue folded his arms and leaned against the wall while Shining slapped a hoof to his face and shook his head.
"What happened to 'nothing is more badass than treating a woman with respect'?" Shining said after removing his hoof from his face.
"What wasn't respectful about that?! It was a compliment! And a joke too! Double the fun!" Torgue grumbled.
"Dude, they are royalty. And you are a new species to us. That kind of asks for a bit more of a formal meeting, not for checking out her flank!" Shining was peeking through a crack in the door to make sure nopony was eavesdropping.
"I wasn't! Where I come from, you compliment people to make friends. That or throw money at them. BOTH ARE EFFECTIVE!"
Shining Armor sighed, "Alright, then explain that to them. I'm sure they'll understand. But for now, try to keep it formal. Like if you were at a business meeting for your company."
"Oh no, not like a business meeting. You don't want that. My business meetings usually involve several people exploding and nuke buttons. My company makes explosives, after all." Torgue smiled at the memory of the nuke button.
"Fine. Just be cool and try not to curse. That's how you be formal." Shining sighed and opened the door, "Now let's see if we can fix this."
Torgue walked back into the dining hall, Shining Armor following shortly behind. To their surprise, the girls were not waiting with angry looks but with mirthful expressions instead. Shining Armor quietly slipped over next to his wife and whispered something in her ear, to which she smiled and nodded. Her nod seemed to make him relax, but Torgue was still sort of confused.
"Wait, I thought you were angry? What did I miss?"
The large white pony stepped forward, "Princess Cadance explained to all of us your... unique sense of grace... and how your comment was likely just as you said it was. A compliment. I must say, though, your sense of respect is... refreshing."
"Thank you! As I always say, NOTHING IS MORE BADASS THAN TREATING A WOMAN WITH RESPECT!" Torgue grinned and flashed a thumbs up.
"Ah, thou art capable of the Royal Canterlot Voice? Thou must be a royal from thine own planet. GREETINGS. I AM PRINCESS LUNA!" Luna bellowed, blowing Torgue back several inches.
"Whoa! I like her!" Torgue grinned, "But I bet I can be louder!"
"Hah! Foolish creature. I accept thy challenge. HAVE AT TH-" Luna was cut off by the white one's hoof over her mouth.
"As entertaining as that would be, I'm afraid there are other things we must attend to first." the white pony turned back to Torgue, "First we must discuss what to do with Mr. Torgue here. I am Princess Celestia, by the way. It occurs that I never properly introduced myself."
"Nice to meet you! And I don't know what you mean 'what to do with me'. As far as I'm concerned, I'm on vacation! LET'S PARTY!"
At this, Pinkie Pie jumped up and took a breath, as if to agree (very eagerly and loudly), but Celestia interjected, "Of course, but I meant for the duration of your stay. If it would suit you, we could arrange for you to stay in Ponyville while you are here."
"Sure! As long as there's booze, explosions and parties, it's fine by me!"
"Woohoo! Can we talk now? Or is the writer going to keep having Torguey and Princess Celestia talk?" Pinkie babbled, causing several heads to turn and stare at her strangely, "What?"
"Uh... I don't know what to say to that. Anyway, who wants to hear about the time I wrestled a shark wearing a bolo tie?! Now, you may be wondering, 'Who was wearing the bolo tie? You or the shark?'. Answer? Yes."



Vinyl Scratch gasped for air as she finished chugging another bottle of Applejack Daniels. As she reached for a seventh, her roommate Octavia entered the kitchen.
"Vinyl! What is the matter with you? Why are you drinking so much alcohol?" Octavia rushed over to her roommate and snatched the new bottle from her before she could open it.
"I... shenshed that a challenger is approacshing... Shomeone who thinksh they can out drink me ish coming to Ponyville. I can feel it. I gotta train..." Vinyl wobbled slightly and suddenly her legs collapsed.
Octavia gasped and checked her roommate but was quickly relieved when she realized she had simply passed out. Octavia quickly lifted Vinyl and carried her to her room and lay her on her bed. As she tucked her in, she thought of this 'challenger' Vinyl had spoken of. If it were true, she thought, then she had better prepare a trip to Canterlot for the next few days. Anyone that could out drink Vinyl was sure to cause a ruckus, and Octavia was not fond of those.