//------------------------------// // Chapter 4 // Story: Purple Pony Princess Possible Pairing Predicament // by Mistershield //------------------------------// “Please, settle down every-” Cadence stopped herself, raising an eyebrow. “Everybody? Yes. Some of you are not ponies.” Eyebrows were raised up by her comment. “Look, I’m trying to be considerate. At least, we are not at each others neck, right?” She had to be supportive, if just for the Center’s message that love can bloom between anyone. “For now. Wait till this meeting is over,” Discord muttered. It was bad enough he had to behave through this stupid meeting. If anything, it should be him and Celestia running it. They were the original unorthodox couple. “Umm, Luna? You and Legolas haven’t had a turn,” Candace diverted the conversation. “Erhm, well,” Luna moved her hooves up, as eyes were turned on her. Legolas was still a topic of interest, even with all the other events going on. Still, Luna was dreading this moment. How was she going to- “We met not too long ago,” Legolas jumped in, looking around at the others. He was just going to be honest. “My people? Race?” The elf took a second to wonder what term to use. “Sailed away to a new land. While my fellow elves found a place to settle, a few of us went off to explore the new frontier.” Luna smiled, relaxing a bit. “Oh, that far back? Legolas took it upon himself to explore the land. I found him on the outskirts of Equestria.” Luna stopped there, narrowing her eyes. “As of late, there have been many,” her eyes moved to scan the faces, “threats. I decided to expand my security sweeps.” “She confronted me during the night. I was not only startled, but also enchanted by her,” Legolas admitted. Luna blushed, unable to help herself. “We have been meeting each other at night since then. Only as political and security measures,” Luna added that last part quickly. “Suuureee..” Chrysalis teased. Sombra closed his eyes a bit to study this ‘Elf’. So far though, Legolas could not detect any deceit in the fellow. “I see. Now I understand why Luna was so curious when I mentioned this group,” Celestia mused. “And here I thought she was spying on Discord and myself.” “As if I would!” Luna blushed again. Just to try not appear guilty, she leaned in to nuzzle Legolas’ cheek. Legolas managed not to squirm at her touch. “We are however, going ‘slow’,” Legolas nodded. Let it not be said he kept his word. “So when exactly were you going to tell the rest of us?” Twilight asked, a bit upset. “This coming from the traitor-dater?” “Ooohhh, I like that. Traitor-dater,” Discord gave Luna two digits up. “Can we please not fight or rile up angers?” Cadence sighed, shaking her head to the sides. “Look, it’s lunchtime. Let’s split up, and move to the next part of the meeting?” “There’s more?” Legolas asked, wondering if he was still going to be left tied to the chair. “Well, while we eat, the sexes split up,” at the sounds of groaning, Cadence moved her hooves up. “Remember, we are here to show support for each other. Males have a way to do things, as do we mares...” She stopped there, turning to look at Twilight. “And you still have a lot of explaining to do, young lady.” “But I-” Twilight stopped, as a magic field begun to divide the room in half. The field started from the left side, the color of a light blue. The glass like barrier moved slowly, causing the other to look around quickly. Only Sombra, Discord, Celestia, and Chrysalis were used to this and moved away from each other. “See? It’s transparent. You can still look at each other,” Cadence smiled. “Though there are no listening devices or powers. So rest assured, nopon- Each side will have their own private conversation.” She stood up, moving to the female side. As she moved, the doors once again opened to have Donut Joe walk in with a cart filled with food. “Joe?” “Discord?” Joe stopped, lifting his eyebrows up at him. “I never figured you for the therapy-kind of guy.” “Says the pony bringing in cucumber and daisy sandwiches,” Discord countered. Down on display was punch and water for drinks. Donuts for dessert of course, and simple sandwiches on display. Mostly light food for lunch, then again this was a non-profit service. There was bound to be price watching. “Hey, I didn’t cook this,” Joe shrugged. The pony wearing an apron pushed the cart to the middle of the room. “I just work here. Umm, Do I need to get more for the big guy?” Tirek merely shook his head to the sides. “You know him?” Celestia asked, raising her eyebrows. “Oh yes, I discorded him a while back,” Discord shrugged. “Oddly enough, he liked himself being so aggressive. So I left him in that state.” Celestia raised her eyebrows, watching Joe walk away. A pony that wanted to be discorded? “Back to splitting up, I like this idea,” Tirek said. “And I’m not just saying this to get Twilight to leave my side.” “Tirek, honey!” Twilight turned to look back up at him. “But-” “It’s just one lunch,” Sombra scoffed. “Besides, I wished to speak with the centaur.” “As would I,” Legolas added. Finally, he was being released from his bonds in order to eat. “Oh...” Twilight released a sigh. At least with the barrier she could still see him. “Ok., but promise me, Tirek, that you will be on your very best behavior.” “I am not going to ask them for sex advice,” Tirek declared as he moved to join the males. “Ahe he he, Tirek you’re so funny!” Twilight chuckled, trying to keep her wings from poomfing out in a wingboner. “Dat ass.” The alicorn bit her lower lip, watching him walk. “Unf.” “Twilight?” Princess Celestia raised her eyebrows at her prized student. The newest princess couldn’t be- Actually no, she did not want to think of that right now. “You got some drool there...” “I do?” Twilight picked up her head, moving a hoof to her mouth. “Er, um, it must be the food, I’m starving! Ehe.” She walked over to the cart, grabbing a cucumber sandwich to start munching and join the others. The other princesses had gathered around to sit on pillows, making a little circle. “Aren’t you going to eat?” “No, Twilight, we must speak with thee.” Luna sighed, wondering why it was mental strain that caused her to revert to old ways. ”I meant you. We know Tirek has not altered your mind, but can you please explain why that traitor is free?” “First of all,” Twilight stopped herself, swallowing her food to talk. “You can only be a traitor if you betray your country.” “Um, Twilight, can we skip the list?” Celestia sighed, knowing her student on a more personal level. She knew what was coming, and most likely a list of why they should allow Tirek to be free. “Well, I guess....” Twilight closed her eyes a bit. Well, they were treating her as an equal now, though it took forever. “I guess I should explain why Tirek is not wrecking havok.” “Surely, it’s not because he loves you,” Cadence moved a hoof out to touch the shoulder of her new sister. “And if ponies are not having their power stolen, where did Tirek get his power from?” “Well, actually he can’t.” Twilight smiled, glad at her own ideas. “Didn’t you noticed his horns? They should be enormous along with the rest of his studly muscles.” “Please stop talking about him like that,” Luna begged, eyes closed a little. “We do wish to eat lunch later.” “Well, do you remember the spell I used to change my friends and I into breezies?” Twilight sat down, moving a hoof out to give Cadence a gentle rub. “I used the change spell to transform Tirek’s body into a variation of his old one. While he has regained some youth and power, I removed his siphon ability.” “That is actually a clever idea Twilight,” Celestia smiled, once again impressed by her student’s ingenuity. “But he still committed crimes, and must answer for them.” “Well, I was getting to that actually,” Twilight giggled, moving to sit next to Cadence. “Well, you all know how everything went back to normal?” Cadence in turn, moved her hoof down and decided to give Twilight a chance to explain. If Twilight was truly in love, it was her duty as her sister to support her. Or get her out of the relationship with Tirek. “Well, other than a new castle,” Luna nodded. “Wrong!” Twilight smiled, lifting her forehoof up to shake it to the sides. “I changed.” “Well, your taste in males at least,” Cadence teased. The purple one blushed a bit, moving her shoulder out to bump her sister. “Well, kinda, but there’s more to it.” Twilight set her hoof down. “I know my role now as a Princess. My duty is to help spread friendship’s magic.” “Well duh.” “Chrysalis!” Celestia narrowed her eyes at her. “Who didn’t see this coming?” The queen asked, eyes closed a bit. “Raise your hoof. Nopony?” “We get your point, back to you though Twilight.” Celestia shook her head to the sides. “As you know, we locked Tirek back up! As soon as I gave you all your power back, I can safely say I was normal again.” “So you, uh, how do I put this... Didn’t lust after Tirek anymore?” Cadence asked. Often, many relationships started only with physical attraction. Or in the enamored persona, like how many a mare tried to reform the “Bad Colt” and live happily ever happen. She hoped this was the case for Twilight. “I can’t actually say,” Twilight tilted her head to the side, not sure how to explain that part. “At the time, I was still trying to come to grip with my new reality. Now, only did the old library need to be built into a new better library, but my friends and I still had to get used to our new powers.” “I still....” Celestia stopped herself. “No wait, I think I know.” The sun guider closed her eyes a bit to deduce things a bit. Twilight stopped, allowing her former mentor a chance. “As a princess of friendship, you felt it was your duty to start somewhere. What a better thing to do than do what Fluttershy did.” “Exactly!” Twilight once again raised her right hoof up. “Friendship reformed Discord. It’s better to reform Tirek now than let him be a potential problem later.” “So are you saying...” Cadence smiled, glad she got it right. “That in your crusade to reform Tirek, you fell in love with him?” “Oh, no no no,” Twilight shook her head to the sides. “I never fell out of love with him.” “But you said...” Cadence stopped herself, turning to look at Luna. “But you didn’t...” “Lust? Not in his old form, no.” Twilight opened her eyes. “But I fell in love with my Tirek during out first confrontation. While I do love him, it’s hard to lust after a body that constantly hides behind a cloak.” “So his age didn’t bother you?” Luna asked, lifting her eyebrow. “If aged bothered me, I wouldn’t be friends with Celestia, Luna, or Discord,” Twilight defended herself. “Besides, I met Tirek for the first time in his power form. That’s how he will always be on my mind.” Twilight lowered her head, smiling at the memory. Luna raised each hoof to the side of her head, trying to still the questions running through her mind. Celestia made a confused squiggle with her lips. It was the same with her and Discord. While she retained her adult and sexy looks, Discord looked older than her. Cadence desperately tried to find another couple to compare Twilek with. Nada. Chrysalis wondered what a cucumber sandwich tasted like. “How? Why? Um, love?” Celestia finally managed to blurt out. “It was his gigantic Tirek, wasn’t it?” “Chrysalis? Really?” Celestia once again turned to look at her queen. Chrissy shrugged, as that was the only thing she could think it was. “Look, you have any idea how much ponies like sex sometimes? You shake a sexy rump in their face and they turn into putty,” Chrysalis shrugged. “Changeling infiltration, 101.” Celestia sighed, giving into the black one’s point. “Actually, thinking back on it?” Twilight raised her eyebrows. “It was his passion.” “Passion?” Cadence picked up her head, finally hearing something she could relate with. Though, the Gigantic Tirek was a close guess. “Well, yeah,” Twilight nodded her head. “All my life I’ve been surrounded by friends, family and ponies. We are all the same. We rally when friends are alone, are in pain, or need help. We bond to grow stronger together.” “I sense a but coming,” Luna moved her own hoof out to urge Twilight on. She was curious as well now. Passion? “Yes, Tirek has a big ass, bigger than Celestia's even.” Twilight threw a look back at her centaur’s muscular form. Celestia stopped a second, throwing a look back at her sunbutt. The other two alicorns did as well. Chrysalis took a second to also nod. “These are strong emotions, yes- but,” Twilight nodded with Luna. “I don’t feel the raw emotion from it. Rainbow jumps into action when there’s danger,” Twilight shrugged. “Applejack rushes in when family is involved. Pinkie and Rarity when their jobs are put into question. And even Fluttershy, actually-” Twilight stopped there, trying to think back. “Well, there was that time she wanted to improve her wing power...” “Please focus, Twilight. How did Tirek’s passion win you over?” Cadence asked. This sounded like when a mare or stallion fell in love with their loved one’s dream or goal in life. “Well, ponies put their emotion and passion in their destiny and loved ones.” Twilight stopped there again, shaking her head to the sides. “But they don’t show it, or at least, express it in a way that can be appreciated by all.” “By all?” Celestia asked, now listening in more intently. Where was Twilight going with this? “Tirek has a passion born of hate. Drive, ambition, even, dare I say, hope.” Twilight shut her eyes, moving her hooves up to hug herself, giggling at the thought. “Imagine all that raw emotion, dedicated on you alone.” “I...” Celestia moved her head back, eyes furrowed in thought. Was that all Twilight cared about? Then again, trying to imagine Tirek being lovey dovey with her student created a very scary thought. “Hm. I can honestly say, not even Shiny can muster the same amount of passion for Cadence,” Chryssy smirked. Cadence shot a look that could kill at her, but then turned to look back at Twilight. It was... sort of the reforming the bad guy scenario. But the pink alicorn did sometimes wish that her Shiny would show passion. Was he attentive? Was he great in bed? Did he command every bit the role of prince? Yes to all, but to compare it to Tirek’s rage? She had seen her husband angry, but all the emotion Shiny could muster was a force field and mean look. “Are you trying to say, that you can imagine Tirek as a prince, loving you with all his emotion and might?” Luna asked. The night princess turned her head to the side, wondering about that. Wasn’t that what loving another was all about? “He harbored rage, and for over a thousand years, he never lost his dream to take over Equestria. And that was just over his brother,” Twilight sighed, leaning her head into her sister’s shoulder. “Can you imagine what he could do if somepony hurts his destined love?” “I admit, eating that amount of emotion would make any changeling into a king beyond kings,” Chryssy admitted. “I know that if somepony dared to insult me, Sombra would unleash a terrible rage.” Celestia blushed a bit, wondering what a large centaur in heat could do to her in a thrall of passion. “But can Tirek even feel love?” Cadence asked. “If Discord and Celestia, even after all this time, are together,” Twilight smiled at her mentor. “I know I stand a chance. But one thing at a time.” __________________________________ Meanwhile, back with the guys... “So... Sombra, was it?” Tirek moved to the table to grab a plate and set some sandwiches on it. “What did you want to speak about?” “Oh, you wish to speak now?” Sombra was about to take a bite out of his food. “Well, may as well get it out of the way. Are you planning to date and then wed Twilight Sparkle? So you can take over Equestria?” Discord immediately flash-teleported next to the dark unicorn, holding a voice recorder with microphone up to the centaur. “Uh, no,” Tirek said, lifting both eyebrows at the device Discord held. “Well, I have no interest in dating Twilight, much less wed a pony.” “Pray tell then, why suggest couple’s counsel?” Legolas asked, looking at the stuff between the bread. “So I can find a way to break Twilight’s heart.” “Ooohh, a revenge scheme?” Discord asked, hoping to get something juicy to share with Celestia. “Can you move that from my face?” Tirek frowned, taking a few steps back. “Nothing of the sort. I just want that sex craved lunatic out of my face.” “Seriously? You’ve been locked away for a century, and you don’t want sex?” Sombra raised an eyebrow. Granted, he was a century old- So maybe an aged being didn’t want sex. But the dark unicorn had been feeling a bit frisky. “I was saving myself for marriage, actually,” Tirek then sat down, using a hand to lift food up to his face. It was weird, eating normal food again. Locked away in a cave, the best he had to eat were moss or mushrooms. “The almighty and all powerful Tirek, a virgin?” Discord lowered the recorder and closed both eyes a little. “Forgive me if I don’t get it.” “Look, it’s a centaur/political thing. When I do have power as a king, I don’t want stupid females trying to usurp my throne by claiming they have an heir with me.” It was hard to understand the centaur as he chewed though. Another thing he lost while imprisoned? Manners. “Forgive me for speaking out,” Legolas set his plate aside, having actually taken a bite out of the sandwich. It did not sit well with him though. “You are all evil-” “Former evil,” Discord quickly darted in with a finger up. “Forgive my oversight,” Legolas moved his left hand out to the chimeric creature. “So why exactly, are you seeking our help?” “I am starting to like you more and more,” Tirek said. Maybe it was because he was the closest thing to a centaur he’s seen in a long time. From the waist up at least. “I need help to break up with Twilight. Anything I seem to do only makes her more adamant than before.” “You have every reason to want freedom. Twilight Sparkle has given you a chance, but you would give it up just to get away from her?” Legolas asked. “Considering you are well over a century old, you could easily outlive her.” “It appears you do not understand my predicament,” Tirek sighed. “You make valid points, but hear mine.” He finished his food and took a sip of water to clear his throat. “One, she is a pony. Former pony? Whatever,” Tirek shut his eyes and sighed. “I hate them and their ways of friendship.” “Go on,” Discord urged on, still recording. “Two. Not only is she a pony, Twilight is Celestia’s student.” Tirek narrowed both eyes, his mouth forming into a snarl. “The princess that not only turned my own brother against me, but also locked me away. I will never forgive her, and just knowing Twilight is associated with that-” “Watch it,” Discord growled. “She may be a pain in the plot, but she’s my pain in the plot.” To make sure he meant business, he made a paddle ball appear in his free hand to start making it bounce. “Jailer,” Tirek turned to look at Discord with a roll of the eyes. “Makes my stomach sick.” “Fair point,” Sombra added, moving to sit down next to Legolas. “With Celestia being ageless, every moment is a constant reminder of how she stays the same, while you rotted away.” Tirek moved his left hand out, glad one pony got it. “Three. I don’t know how I’m even supposed to have coitus with that tiny plot,” Tirek moved his other than to point at Twilight. “Even in this size, I know I’m more than big enough to make her pass out.” Legolas moved his right hand to his mouth, trying to keep himself from vomiting. Discord moved to get some soap appear in his paw. Then it was pushed it into his right ear, trying to wash the mental image out of his head. “Four,” Tirek moved his hand up to raise a finger for each point given. “While Twilight had been nothing but intolerably nice to me,” Tirek sighed. “I wish not for the equestrians to resent her for staying at my side.” Discord took the soap out of his head, his gaze relaxing a little. That... That was something he actually had in common with the centaur. Celestia was more than willing to put up with the morale and scrutiny ponies would have at their relationship. “Don’t tell me you have a soft spot for Twilight...” “Hmm?” Tirek closed both eyes a bit, turning to look at Discord. “No, fool. What’s the point of marrying into royalty, if the kingdom won’t accept it?” Sombra nodded at that, since he had to take over the Crystal Kingdom by force. “Any other reasons? These sound like excuses why not to date Twilight. Are you trying to convince us, or yourself?” Legolas moved to wipe his mouth with a napkin. “Five. I’m old. Damn older than Celestia herself,” Tirek growled. Honestly, did they think him to be so sentimental? “Twilight, in comparison, is still in her mother’s womb. Not only do my tastes in a mate have nothing to do with ponies, our maturity levels are on completely opposite sides of the planet. Every time I look at her, I see a naive child with some school filly crush instead of an adult.” “Well, that...” Legolas moved a hand to his chin. It was the same for elves that fell in love with humans. Sometimes, the elf had looked upon men as children, even though they were old. “That is a fair point.” “But, we have a problem though,” Sombra sighed. He lowered his magic field, which he had used to lower his drink down. “I have no idea how to make a mare break up with you. I was a tyrant king, and had many a mare in my bed. Any that rejected me were sent to build more stairs.” “Obviously,” Legolas coughed into his right fist. Stairs? “No idea either. I only known Luna for a week.” “Well, it’s true me and Celly have broken up a few times,” Discord thought back. “It was so long ago I can barely remember. Also, I may have been shooting ponies out of cannons to the moon at the time.” They all turned to look at Discord. “What?” .”Then I’m doomed,” Tirek sighed, moving both hands to hold each side of his head. “Don’t you read any fairy tales?” Sombra asked, lifting his eyebrows. “While I don’t know how to make a mare break up with you- I offer this alternative. Make Twilight prove her love to you.” “What?” Tirek asked, picking up his head. “Oh, I come from the Crystal Kingdom, the center of love for Equestria. Often in fairy tales, a fair princess makes her prince prove his love.” Sombra tried to think of a good example, but none came to mind. “All you have to do is make a request so outrageous, she will never be able to do it.” “Hmm... Yes, yes,” Tirek smiled, moving both hands to rub in front of himself. “I can make it a challenge. If Twilight cannot complete it, there is no way I can accept her. I just have to make a challenge so dark and evil, that she will have no choice but to say no...” “This has taken a very dark turn,” Legolas shut both eyes, wondering what evil Tirek had in mind. Discord wrestled with the idea in his head, wondering what he should do. One one hoof, it meant that Tirek would no longer be with Twilight. On the other hoof, it would break her heart. He turned to look at his shoulders, summoning his devil and angel side. “Oh, you must support Tirek!” Fluttershy said, standing on Discord’s right shoulder. She was tiny, with a halo made of tin sticking over her forehead with a piece of wire. “The poor thing made lots of points, and it’s best for Twilight to break things off now before they get worse. It’s the best for everypony.” Discord turned to look at his left shoulder, wondering what his inner devil had in mind. “Heya Dissy!” Tiny Devil Deadpool called out, holding both thumbs up. “Listen up man! I’m the man with da plan! You should totally help Tirek out. Check it, you owe your friends, right? From what it looks like, Twilight hasn’t told her friends about this!” “I’m listening,” Discord said, suddenly intrigued. Tiny angel Fluttershy also leaned in to look at Deadpool. “Obviously, Twilight’s friends would owe you a solid! You, Discord, saved your friend from the evil sexy hands of Tirek! You’ll be a hero! You need those sexy brownie points! Not only will you get back at Big Red over there back in the slammer, but you will also make Twily Horn sad! And the kicker?! I won’t be your fault!” Discord raised both eyebrows. For once in his life, both good and evil were in agreement! There was no need to summon the 7,014 other voices he listened to! “Hey thanks-” Discord stopped there, watching Devil Deadpool and Angel Fluttershy making out. With opened mouth tongue wrestling. “You okay, Discord?” Sombra asked, wondering why the draconequus had made that disgusted face. “Sorry, sorry,” Discord sighed. “I was just thinking of an impossible quest for Tirek to use.” “Oh? Let’s hear it,” Tirek asked. Was Discord doing this to help a bro out, or simply to get him back in jail? Either way, he needed ideas. “Have Twilight overthrow Celestia,” Discord spoke, not even thinking about what came out of his mouth. Damnit! Why was he such a genius? “That’s perfect!” Tirek called out, moving his hands out to grasp Discord by the shoulders. “Not only will Twilight not betray her precious mentor, it’s believable! I will simply say I want Celestia to know the same betrayal I did when she turned my brother on me!” Bonus: “Angel, baby, please, I know you can’t help but love the Merc with the Mouth, but-” Devil Deadpool had to stop, motioning with his head behind himself. “This is a bit much.” “I always cry at weddings,” Discord admitted, throwing rice at the couple. His free claw moved to wipe the tears from his face. The Angel and Devil were in a chapel, standing before Celestia. Well, more like standing on an altar while Celestia looked down at the couple through a magnifying glass. “You may now kiss the husband.” Fluttershy squeed, throwing herself at the tied up Deadpool and unleashed countless nuzzles with smooches and cuddles on her hubby.