So, my friend made this. I literally sat him down and told him to speak and I typed out what he said. Everything you just read were his exact words, save a little pampering. I had no idea what he was going to say, and I claim NO RESPONSIBILITY FOR THIS!!!
So, yeah... please forgive me, he lives nearby if you want to start an angry mob and kill him and stick him on a stake and pee on him.
Thank you.
Have a wonderful day.