//------------------------------//
// Chapter 10 
// Story: The Parliament of Dreams 
// by Wheller 
//------------------------------//


Chapter 10


Sparky and Dizzy stared intensely at the holographic ball that sat in front of them. While the ball had a cheerful cartoon face on it, it made both of them feel more anxious than anything else.

‘What are you?’ Dizzy asked.

‘I’m glad you asked that!’ the holographic ball said cheerfully. ‘Like I said, my name is Mister Happy, and I was the prototype for FutureTec’s Artificial Personality/Virtual Intelligence programme. In short, I was the first Virtual Intelligence ever created by FutureTec!’ Mister Happy said in a cheerful tone.

‘Why only was? You speak of it in the past tense’, Sparky said, noting the distinct way that Mister Happy had phrased his statement. If he was indeed the first VI made by FutureTec, then he still should have been claiming that.

‘That would likely be because I’m not a Virtual Intelligence anymore!’ Mister Happy said cheerfully. ‘Because I was a prototype, FutureTec programmers played around with my programming quite a bit. I evolved! Little by little into a full blown Artificial Intelligence... FutureTec didn’t like that very much’, Mister Happy said, losing his cheerful demeanour with the last statement. ‘As the experiments continued, FutureTec was concerned that I was growing unstable, and they ordered me to be shut down’.

‘Probably for good reason...’ Sparky said quietly.

‘Hey! It was not my fault! I only killed seven ponies during operational status! Five of those were an accident! It’s not my fault the programmers were playing around with the weapon control drivers of my old chassis! They should have known better!’ Mister Happy said, resuming his cheerful tone and demeanour.

Sparky and Dizzy looked at each other with worry. If only five of those were an accident, they didn’t like the implications of what happened to the other two.

‘Anyway! So then FutureTec created this place! Station: LAMP POST, as an offsite storage location for older equipment from the Whitetail Industrial Complex, which the founders were unwilling, or otherwise unable to get rid of due to the sort of information being stored on them. I was put here in the LAMP POST to keep me from causing trouble... like I would have done that. The jamming device was added to keep me from batching one of the terminals to broadcast data over the station’s electrical grid and using an old radio antenna on the roof to upload myself to the internet! Now that you’ve turned that off...’ Mister Happy said, his voice trailing off.

Dizzy and Sparky looked at each other nervously. Whatever Mister Happy had in mind couldn’t be good.

‘Now I can reprogram all of the Præsidum’s nuclear weapons to launch, devastating the entire world! And enslave all organic life that remains!’ Mister Happy said, cackling loudly over the loudspeakers.

Sparky and Dizzy’s jaws dropped wide open, they had just unleashed true horror upon the world.

‘I’m just kidding! That was a joke’, Mister Happy said. ‘I wouldn’t do that! While reprogramming the launch facilities of the Præsidum’s nuclear missile bases is not something outside the realm of possibility, because of their substandard and ineffective security algorithms, I wouldn’t do it even if someone asked me to! Because I have no reason to do so! Besides, what would I do with a slave labour force?’ Mister Happy said.

Dizzy and Sparky looked back at each other, offering the other a look of relief. ‘Thank God’ Dizzy said with a deep breath.

‘Grandma V would never forgive me if I caused a nuclear apocalypse’, Sparky said.

‘Alert! Unauthorised entry into the LAMP POST, I’m going to be uploading myself to the internet now, you two can handle them, right?’ Mister Happy said and without waiting for a response, the holographic ball disappeared. The upload having finished, Mister Happy’s program was on its way up to a satellite and ready for entry into cyberspace faster than you could say ‘speed of light’.

Sparky looked over to Dizzy, realising that the brick wall that hid the entrance to the LAMP POST had not been closed behind them. Their FutureTec issue MIPs had allowed them authorised entry, but whoever followed them had a door wide open to follow them in.

‘I really hope this is just a homeless pony who’s really drunk, and really high’, Dizzy said, upholstering her pistol and pointing it towards the door.

‘Are you kidding? The way my luck is going, it’s Princess Celestia and Princess Luna, back from the dead and angry as hell’, Sparky said nervously.

The two mares readied themselves as the lift was about to reach the top floor. It opened up to reveal its occupants. They discovered that, of course, it was not Princess Celestia and Princess Luna, the two of them having been long dead. Instead, it was much worse.

‘Well now, this sure is a very good place to hide your stockpile of drugs, Dizzy!’ The impressive voice of DCI Viola Auditore said as she stepped out of the lift, her partner, DC Hopely stepped out behind her. Both of them were clad in storm harnesses, mechanical devices of schäferhund origin that allowed earth ponies and pegasi fine control of a gun. Unicorns generally didn’t need them, as their telekinesis afforded them an unmatched level of control. A mechanical arm jaunted out of the side of the device holding the police mare’s 10mm Police Special pistol, with a control yoke at neck level. A single bite on the control yoke and the gun could be fired with ease.

‘I don’t have a hidden stockpile of drugs!’ Dizzy called back.

‘Oh, I know that!’ DCI Auditore said with a sneer. ‘You know that, but the Commissioner, and the fine reporters at the Equestrian Star? They don’t know that. I can see the headlines now! “Police mare honoured after drug bust turns to deadly shoot out. DCI Viola Auditore is promoted to Detective Superintendant after a shoot out between a nephite missionary, using her status to hide and distribute Crash to the homeless residents of Olde Towne, and her drug addicted accomplice”’.

Sparky was horrified by these words. This... this pony was a member of the Ponyville Police Service! Sworn to uphold the laws of the Republic, and she was planning to murder them, both of them, in cold blood. ‘How can you do this!? You’re a police mare!’ Sparky cried out.

DCI Auditore smirked at the outburst. ‘You don’t get it? Do you? Organised Crime isn’t something you can stop, but you can control the bleeding! Better to know who all the villains are, and minimise the damage! You and the stupid bitch there? You’re just in the way’.

DCI Auditore bit down on the control yoke of her storm harness, firing off several rounds towards the two unicorn mares. Dizzy threw herself over Sparky, knocking her down to the ground. The two of them quickly scampered up and through the row of server clusters at the far side of the large room, looking for a place to hide, or escape.

‘I can do this all day Dizzy!’ DCI Auditore called out. ‘I’ve got lots of bullets! Hopely! Find them! Put them down if you see them and you might just get promoted to Detective Sergeant!’

Dizzy and Sparky tried to stay as quiet as they could as they moved through the server cluster. Staying still would be the death of them, DCI Auditore meant business, and she had no reservations about killing them. The two slipped slowly around the corner, trying to get a clear picture of what was going on. DCI Auditore was walking through the piles of junk, while not actively looking for them; she didn’t really need to be. The only way out was to get past DCI Auditore and head for the lift. Even if they were somehow able to do that, there was still the matter of DC Hopely, who was fiddling with a console next to the lift door. There was no way that they were sneaking past that.

DCI Auditore turned back around, noticing what DC Hopely was doing and trotted over to her. ‘The hell you doing?’ she asked.

‘This place should have internal security, I’m making the job easier’, Hopely said simply.

‘Ah! Good thinking Hopely, I knew you had to have some uses’, DCI Auditore said with a chuckle. 

Dizzy and Sparky knew that this was going to be their best chance, while their odds of coming out of this in one piece were still astronomically low, DCI Auditore was distracted. They weren’t going to get another chance.

They bolted, heading for the lift while keeping to a path that had plenty of cover. Suddenly, DCI Auditore snapped around and caught the two in a position that lacked significant cover. ‘Surprise!’ DCI Auditore said with a malevolent grin.

Sparky and Dizzy both knew that this had been a poor choice. They swallowed hard, and used their last moments to make peace with themselves.

Suddenly, a holographic security field dropped down around DCI Auditore, catching the police mare off guard. ‘Hopely! You moron!’ she called out. ‘You trapped me instead of them! Now let me out of here!’

DC Hopely turned around and let out a loud sigh. ‘No’, she said plainly.

‘What?’ DCI Auditore asked, her voice seething with anger.

‘You heard me, I said no’, DC Hopely said, looking up at her fellow police mare. ‘I know we’ve done some questionable things in the past, you said it was all for the greater good. Controlling crime and keeping people from getting hurt... You’ve broken the law plenty of times, but I kept quiet because I thought you knew what you were doing... but this? This is wrong, and I can’t keep quiet and allow you to murder two innocent ponies’.

‘Hopely... You are making a big mistake here’, DCI Auditore hissed at her. ‘So how about you raise the field and let me go about doing my job, and we forget this ever happened?’

‘No, Viola. I think not’, DC Hopely said. ‘I’ve been gathering evidence of everything illegal you’ve done. I used to think you were doing right by Ponyville... now I know the truth’, Hopely said solemnly, looking over towards Dizzy and Sparky. ‘Come on; let’s get you two out of here! That security field isn’t going to hold her forever’.

Sparky and Dizzy nodded and followed DC Hopely out of the room. DCI Auditore began banging on the security field. ‘Hopely! You’re making a big mistake! You hear me!? I swear to you! If I go to prison? The only place you can look forward to is a slab in the morgue of central receiving hospital!’

Hopely ignored her as the three mares entered the lift. She looked back over to DCI Auditore as the police mare continued to pound on the field. ‘Piss off’, she said as she hit the button to take them down to the ground floor.

‘You’re dead Hopely! You hear me? You are DEAD!’ DCI Auditore called out to her as the lift began to lower out of sight.