"Discord! Dissccooorrd!" Alucard was walking around town searching high and low for his disfigured friend. "Discord! Where are you, you ugly looking fucker!"
As if on queue Alucard heard movement in the fountain next to him. "I'm here...I think." Discord replied.
"Uhh, Where's your arm?" Alucard asked.
"Oh, yeah this happens." Discords arm reappeared on him and he was ready and waiting to go. "So, what's on the schedule today?"
"Okay well I think we should give the bitches some space. That was one hell of a party and you really need to get me some more of that blue stuff."
"You mean poison joke?" Discord replied.
"Hey, I don't care what its called. I've never been that high before in my life. Anyways, bitches need space. Now how does this grab you?" Discord was waiting patiently. "We dethrone Celestia."
"Dethrone Celestia." Discord repeated. "Are you sure you're not still a little high?"
"Trust me, I started coming down somewhere around 4 in the morning. That's kind of why I locked myself in the closet."
"Well." Discord said as he materialized a cup of tea in his hand. "I'm all in if you truly think you can do it but I have one question, who's going to take over Celestia's place?" Discord began to sip some of his magic tea.
'Luna!" Alucard yelled happily.
Discord almost choked. "Luna?! Oh come on, she's not that different from Celestia! Granted she's not as strict but still."
"Oh trust me Discord...You don't know her like I do." Alucard raised an eyebrow. "If you know what I mean. And besides can you run a country?"
Discord got ready to answer but was cut off by Alucard. "No you can't. And besides it'd get boring after awhile. It's just not worth it." Discord didn't respond. "Come on, we've got a bitch to dethrone."
Vegeta was almost napping when a guard came up to the cell. "Rise! Or in your cases...crouch. The princess will now hear your trial."
"It's about time." Vegeta said getting out of the cell. The restraints were replaced on the three and they were led to Celestia's throne room.
Princess Celestia sat in her throne room and was reading over unneeded paperwork until Shining Armor walked in. "It's good to see you again Shining Armor." Celestia said.
"Same to you princess."
"Tell me, how is Princess Cadence and the Crystal Empire?" Celestia asked with a warm smile.
"They're great princess, thanks for asking."
"So what brings you by?" Celestia continued in her inquiries.
"Well I came in for the holiday to see Twilight but instead I had to capture some strange creatures causing trouble in Ponyville." Shining said as he took up his place next to Celestia for the trial.
"Oh yes I was reading through the paperwork you submitted." That was a blatant lie. Celestia never read paperwork that came to her. "Bring in the prisoners!" She said staring at the entrance.
As Celestia gave the order the throne room doors swung open and there stood Rainbow Dash, Vegeta, and Goku with Vegeta now making eye contact with Celestia.
"Well shit." Celestia said loosing her friendly demeanor.
"Well, well, well." Vegeta said slowly walking towards the throne. "You're Celestia. I didn't catch your name last time when I kicked your ass."
"Yes, well, uh-" Celestia was cut off by Shining Armor.
"How dare you! No one speaks to the princess like that!"
"I'll speak to her however I god damn want to!" Vegeta readjusted his sight to Celestia. "I can't believe I'm seeing you again. Where's the blue one, I think her name was Luna. She still owes me."
"Shining Armor will you please leave us for a moment." Celestia said towards Shining who left the room with the other guard.
Vegeta looked at his hands. "No need to keep this act up anymore." Without a second thought he broke the restraints and focused on Celestia.
"Alright, you've proven before that I can't beat you. You're stronger than me and I can accept that." Celestia sighed. "What kind of deal do I have to make here?"
"Deal?" Vegeta asked in surprise. Rainbow was shocked at the situation in front of her and was rubbing her hooves where Goku had broken her restraints. "Just three things. Bitches, immortality, and a one way ticket hom-"
As if out of no where Vegeta could have sworn that he heard Back in Black by ACDC blaring through the hallways behind him and as if on queue Alucard came smashing through the throne room doors in an oversized Hummer with a bass boosted stereo system, pimped out rims, and a red under glow. Not to mention the license plate that read 'bite me!' on the back. Discord was at the wheel and had on huge aviator glasses and a jacket that read 'BAD ASS' across the back.
"Sup bitch." Alucard said as he got out of the beast of a vehicle.
"Celestia." was all Discord said looking at the princess.
Celestia along with the others were shocked at the sight before them. "Those were my favorite doors." Celestia mumbled.
"Oh my god its you again." Vegeta said looking at Alucard. "Why can't you just go home or something?"
"Pfft. You'd miss me." Alucard responded while pulling out his oversized gun.
Celestia sat in her throne and pondered the situation. Okay Celestia, you've been through worse...No actually this is as bad as it can get. That one with black spikey hair will take a bribe but Alucard is a different story.
"So you're cool with me killing her right?" Alucard asked Vegeta.
"I don't care, as long as I get to go home. You can do whatever the fuck you want." Vegeta responded.
"I can actually take care of that for you if you want." Discord said now moving towards Vegeta.
"Bitchin." Alucard said as he readjusted his sight to the throne. But something was different. It was lacking a certain bitch. "Oh that sneaky bitch ran!" Alucard thought for a moment and turned to Discord. "Discord, I need you to do me a solid and bring Luna here."
Without a second thought Discord snapped his fingers.
Luna had just finished toweling off after a hot shower and Twilight had made coffee with some toast. She also scraped Spike off the ceiling and had him hard at work cleaning up the library.
"Ally really knows how to throw a party, don't you think?" Luna asked as she grabbed some coffee and a piece of toast.
Twilight rubbed her head. "Yeah, but honestly I've never really been to very many parties."
"Well you will be now. Especially since he's back in town." Luna levitated her cup up to take a drink but the cup fell and shattered on the floor as she disappeared in a white flash.
"Ta-da!" Alucard yelled as he pointed Luna to the throne. "It's all yours my little princess."
"Wha..but. Celestia?" Luna asked in a confused voice.
"Pussed out like a bitch!" Alucard replied.
"Well uh." Luna was beginning to perk up. "I have always wanted to sit on the throne. At least for a few moments."
"Why not the rest of your life?" Alucard pushed Luna towards the throne causing her to stumble into it. "Well, are you still pissed at me for leaving all those years ago?"
Luna smiled and looked happier than ever. "Well this is a good start." She began to trail off. "But, I think something else might be in order...Everyone out! Except you Ally." She said in a seductive tone.
"Oh boy." Discord said as he teleported out of the room with all the accessories he had brought with him and he even had the decency to fix the doors.
"No wait! You motherfucker!" Vegeta ran out of the throne room to try and find Discord with Goku and a very confused Rainbow Dash following close behind.
When the room was clear Luna slammed the doors closed with her magic. Alucard readjusted his view to Luna and gave a smile. "Sooo. How's it goin'."
"Oh shut up." Luna then jumped at Alucard going for a full on tackle.
And then everything sexual happened. Tune in later to see how Alucards relationship plays out and to see if Vegeta ever gets his way. And don't miss out on Discord's new product line, Ol'de Chaos. Next up, News 9 with anchors Sunny Weather and Stormy Clouds.
Closed Caption provided in part by:
Ol'de Chaos. Feel the Chaos.