//------------------------------// // A Game on the Strange // Story: Change is Good // by AdmiralTigerclaw //------------------------------// I, Chrysalis, Swarm Queen of my hive for six centuries, do begrudgingly admit to those present that I was thoroughly terrified. I had stood upon the precipice of total victory with Celestia beaten, her chosen virtues captured, and her city falling before my cunning and might. Only a sloppy mistake on my part allowed Cadance and Shining to cast my forces from the city with such finality. But even as that happened, I had no fear of the consequences. The swarm has faced greater adversity over the years, and being scattered by a harmless shield spell would be of little consequence in the long run. After all, Canterlot could not maintain the vigil forever, and I wasn't about to let an annoying setback like that stop me. I got in undetected once, I could do it again. So even as I flew, upset and howling at such a perfect win turned to total defeat, I was planning. Sparkle, that little unicorn with too much intelligence for her own good, would be my first target. It may sound like I was revenge-happy, and maybe I was. But it was still the most prudent move to make. I would have her, her magic, and the keys to Celestia's little friendship super-weapon in one fell swoop. And then I'd be able to infiltrate on a much more leisurely schedule and capture the city in its sleep. Unfortunately, or maybe for the better really, such plotting on my behalf was not to come to pass. I'd only managed to right myself in the air when Canterlot flashed in the distance like the sun itself had awoken. My course unaltered, I watched mesmerized as a rainbow arched high into the sky. I'd heard about the magical artifacts known as the Elements of Harmony. It was part of a defense meeting I attended while impersonating Cadance. I didn't learn much, only that they were fickle, as is the case with many ancient artifacts. But I knew they were powerful. Many artifacts across the world hold powers not even The Devourer can comprehend. Thus, my warriors had been positioned to beat the virtues to their destination. It was by this fact alone that I realized that the light slowly starting to bend towards me was no retaliation from Celestia or her citizens. She was incapacitated after that little feedback burst from our duel and safely tucked in a cocoon, and the virtues would have taken longer to collect the Elements than I'd been in the air. That was when I felt the first pangs of horror; Watching a wall of color home in on me. Ancient magical artifacts were not just powerful, they also tended to have wills of their own. The queen before me had literally beaten that lesson into me before I took the swarm. The greatest of magical artifacts were to be considered living things. And like any living thing, they have moods, and they are always watching. I realized then that I'd forgotten to account for that in my oh-so-perfect invasion scheme. Artifacts that did nothing were artifacts that were content. I should have realized it the moment Celestia spoke of them that I was dealing with an entire nation of chosen, but I didn't. And as I flew through the air with the sight of that light filling my vision, I realized my mistake, and I knew fear. Because I had angered these Elements of Harmony. I would have screamed in real fear if my howls of outrage hadn't already sucked the air from my lungs. I couldn't flee or even dodge in the time I had left, not that it would have done any good. Stories passed down through many races tell of the vindictive nature of Artifacts. You can't run; you can't hide. That only makes it worse. So I did the only thing I could, I closed my eyes and waited for the end. The rainbow struck, and even as I felt the magic sear my senses like magma, I couldn't help but have one last bitter thought: Why did THEY get the protection? And I knew no more. “I don't remember seeing any rainbows in the sky at the end of the invasion,” Crystal Clear frowned. “Neither do I,” Nora agreed. “Then again, I wasn't exactly paying attention to the sky right about that time. How many changelings had we fought off?” “More than the guards,” Crystal rolled her eyes. “I had a count higher than Hammer, and he's a twenty year veteran.” “I think you and Stormcrow both had a higher count than anypony else,” Nora frowned. “They didn't exactly take too well to lightning bolts and wall-cracking shrieks.” “Hey!” the younger mare frowned. “What I did was not shrieking. That was legitimate Royal Canterlot Voice Amplification and-” “ERHEM...” Fancy interrupted before motioning to Chrysalis. “Ladies?” The changeling queen was scowling, her forelegs crossed in irritation. “Oh...” Crystal Clear wilted at the sight of the changeling's glare. “Heh... Sorry.” Chrysalis regarded the younger mare silently for several more seconds before she finally relaxed her posture. “At least that explains why I have about four-hundred workers who can't hear properly,” Chrysalis muttered. Then she raised her voice. “But we can discuss that later.” No doubt, Gazer has told you of his experience finding me. And once more, I admit the mind-numbing terror I felt. I awoke to pain, unnatural chills, and the sound of being spoken to after taking both Shining's shield, and a blast from harmony incarnate. My faculties weren't all there, and all I saw was the dark form of a creature as big as a minotaur looming over me against the sky. It didn't take me long to realize my form was wrong and transformation wasn't working. The balance was too far back and just trying to break into a decent trot was proving impossible. Even for a changeling of my age and experience, I was confounded. I still don't fully understand how humans have such mastery of their upright balance. Either way, I was quickly overpowered by the brute I had encountered and easily restrained. I panicked, understandably. Perhaps hoping that my struggle would prove too much trouble and I'd be allowed to go free, perhaps to die on my own terms. It was only after he had summoned more of his kind that I slowly came to my senses. I wasn't dead, or dying, or being killed. And they came out of nowhere in metal chariots covered in lights. These weren't vicious animals like the jungles where I grew up, but intelligent creatures. Even if my instincts were suppressed and my powers somehow removed, I still had my wits. I feigned silent shock, easy enough to do considering my state, and simply listened. Amazing what you can learn in just a few seconds. Creatures I could understand, probably even speak with later. Creatures that seemed, laughably, as gullible as the ponies I'd tricked in Canterlot. It didn't take long to realize I was dealing with their equivalent to guards and healers. What threw me off though was the continuing lack of any sense for my changeling powers. Even more disturbing was how I'd lacked that one sense all changelings have for the magic we feed on. I'd spent most of the spare power I'd accumulated overpowering Celestia, and should have felt at least a pull, like a craving one would have for a treat long forgotten. Fortunately, my form was giving me the time I needed to sort things out. My condition and circumstances were apparently for one who had been abused and then left to rot. It was a cover I was more than willing to work with at the time, and easy enough to milk for all it was worth without saying a word. They ushered me into one of their chariots after that, laying me down to rest in a small bed on wheels and driving me to who-knows-where. I knew not of the speed, or had any understanding of the sounds. I heard only the talk you'd hear from healers. My exhaustion caught up with me by then, and I didn't realize until later that I'd fallen asleep. When I awoke again, I found myself in the most antiseptic little room imaginable. I was in a proper bed at that point, and propped up slightly so I could see around me. Not that there was much to see in such a place. It was like the castle infirmary I had toured as 'Cadance'. That was at least satisfying. So far, the story I was playing into was holding up. The bed was comfortable, and my aches were dulled by the rest. A little patience and I'd be on my way none-the-worse for wear. Except I still couldn't feel my power. At first, I wasn't worried. Maybe it was just shock or having drained myself so hard fighting Celestia. But after laying in bed, staring at strangely powered lights for a day, I had become worried again. I had been struck by the power of vindictive artifacts. Nothing ever walked away from such an event unscathed. Deny it all I wanted, I had to quickly face the idea that I'd been more than simply struck down and banished. By the second day I was sure of it. My powers were still beyond any sense, and my hunger for magic was just as absent. If I had been a younger queen, I would have broken by then. However, like I said, I've been a Swarm Queen for centuries. So long as my blood was flowing, I could act, even if I'd been crippled. I just didn't know exactly what I would do. My current situation left me pretty much without even a clue where to even begin. Even if I wanted to find some way to retaliate against something as powerful as the Elements, I had no idea where I was, what I was, and what I could do with it. In short, I was stuck. The third day I had settled on being both cross and bored. Cross that an artifact would dump me into a situation like this- I would have preferred a quick death really- and bored because, well... Three days in bed is BORING! The humans- I'd learned enough to figure that out by then -advised me to stay in bed as much as possible until their doctors were certain I was fit enough to be up. I followed that advice, but only to stick with my cover. The bed was comfortable though. It also moved if you played with a small device next to it. That was worth half an hour of amusement... By the fourth day, I was pretty much sick of it. Aside from the inane questions of a human in a fancy suit, I was already aware I was doomed to another day of counting the seconds as they ticked by, and trying my best to observe human locomotion without looking like I was interested. When the one who'd found me popped in, I think I was somewhere between ten thousand, and ten thousand-six. I didn't show it, but I was amused at how he seemed to realize I wasn't really even remotely interested in anything any of the humans had to say that wasn't 'you're free to go'. Most humans seemed to be about as oblivious as any pony was that 'Cadance' wasn't exactly acting right. Still, that little amusing surprise was nothing to how I felt when he returned within a few minutes to give me the strangest little device. At first, I thought it was a mirror, which would be utterly stupid for more than one reason, but the way he mentioned there were things ON it that he called time-wasters... Well, for the first time in days I had something to occupy my mind that wasn't revenge or hopelessness. He left without explaining anything about it, likely assuming I knew enough to understand it, which was fine for my cover. But... If I could do it again, I would have at least asked what I was supposed to do with it. Luckily, one of the human nurses seemed surprised to discover it, and it was more than easy enough to manipulate her into working it for me. I thought I had a magical item for a moment, because it was no thicker than a few scrolls stacked together, and glowed like a storage crystal. A few touches to the surface was all it took to make it display many different things or emit sounds. If my instincts hadn't been so dull and my senses so numb from the whole ordeal, I probably would have at least tried to rip her throat out in an attempt to recover it. Of course, I quickly realized that I wasn't dealing with any mysterious tome. The nurse was upset at how I'd acted, but brushed it off as some trivial reason. Her nonchalant behavior was enough to tip me off that the item, while valuable, was somewhat common. Still, it was genuinely the most amusing little device I had ever seen. I learned quickly how to make it bend to my will and soon discovered the 'time-wasters' I'd been briefly informed of. I don't think I would have slept that night if it weren't for the fact that apparently, like most magical devices, it eventually ran out of power. The unbelievable part was that I understood that much. It wasn't powered by magic, but it required some form of energy to work. It even informed me that it was going to run out. It was sobering. I caught myself more concerned about the device in my possession than about my situation or my cover. My desperation to overcome the boredom had overpowered my senses. I needed to be prepared to make a move, and I was completely distracted. A queen knows how to prioritize after all. A little distraction to break up the boredom is acceptable, but I'd lost hours to the... Tablet. I should have been learning the locomotion of the body I was in like any changeling would a new form. That had to be fixed. And the Tablet needed to be 'recharged'. And I needed to know how. As a queen, I can be quite persistent in getting what I want. I upset the nurse by disobeying the advice of the human doctors, but I managed to at least get a feel for their method of walking enough to leave my room. I was clumsy, something only Princess Luna and Gazer will ever be privy to seeing, but I managed. It took careful wording not to reveal I knew nothing about how to recharge it, but once more the human tendency to fill in all the gaps for me worked to my advantage. I discovered the secret of the 'power socket' and the 'plug'. It was glorious. And even though my revenge upon Twilight Sparkle was looking more and more like a distant fantasy, I could at least take my frustrations out on an equally suitable target... Zombies. The little devils were worse than trying to fight off a rival queen's swarm. Okay, I admit, I let my priorities slip. But after everything I'd experienced since Canterlot, could any intelligent creature really blame me? “It's a hospital,” Gazer interrupted. “Even if you got sidetracked, they would have gotten you on your fee-hoo-... They would have gotten you standing and walking anyway.” “That doesn't excuse my lapse,” Chrysalis frowned at the drone. “That kind of lapse put me in that situation in the first place.” “No...” Gazer frowned. “YOU decided to put yourself in that position. Didn't you just say the Elements got angry at you? On top of the other things we've discussed, how well do you think those things would have taken it if you had WON back there?” Chrysalis opened her mouth to argue but stopped short, her eyes rolling to the side as she paused to think. “Oh...” she frowned after a moment. “Oh wow...” “It sounds as if losing to Shining and Cadance in the end was really the best option there was,” Nora added her own thoughts. “I keep telling her and she keeps saying she knows,” Gazer shook his head. “But she still doesn't want to believe it... She's stubborn like that.” “Says the guy who hides behind his work so he doesn't have to talk to anyone,” Chrysalis shot back in irritation. “I talk to people just fine!” the drone retaliated. “There's a difference between knowing one's limits and hiding from people.” Chrysalis jumped up and jabbed a hoof at him. “Is that why you lived in your metal box in the middle of nowhere?” she asked angrily. “Is that why you isolated yourself from your own kind like a dragon? Alone in your 'cave' with your hoard of work and technology?” Everyone cringed in sympathy as Gazer reacted as if slapped. His ears flattening, he looked away, mouth opening and closing as if trying to find something to say. “Don't speak of me about my flaws and deny your own, DRONE!” Chrysalis continued in a full on angry rant. “You may be my intellectual superior, but I am six centuries your senior! I have made more mistakes in my lifetime than you've had years on yours! Do NOT speak as if I'm some mewling child you need to take care of when the opposite might as well be true!” There was a stunned silence from the queen's outburst, punctuated by her heavy breathing and the crackling of the fire between them. After a few seconds, she seemed to remember where she was, her ears drooping as her eyes swept back and forth across the group. Lowering her head and sitting back, she spoke, albeit quietly. “I'm... sorry,” she muttered. After a few more moments, the drone spoke as well. “So am I,” he stated gently. Another round of awkward silence occurred before the changeling queen restored her story-telling posture and took a calming breath. “I do apologize to my guests,” she spoke in a more measured tone. “My outburst was uncalled for.” A quiet clopping of hooves being brought together drew Chrysalis' attention to Fleur, who was applauding quietly. The two shared a look and exchanged a smile before the queen took another, more confident breath. “I should continue,” she began. A human's body is a surprisingly durable, but squishy affair. My injuries from Canterlot had somehow managed to translate through the transformation into a fairly even amount of bruising across my entire front. The doctors and nurses were confused as to how such a uniform, wide scale injury could be inflicted upon one of their kind, yet do little more significant damage. Part of my cover of course, was being unsure as to what happened, so that left them to guess. I hurt through all of this, but I'd grown accustom to the severity of pain and its meaning long ago. While my injuries were nothing to laugh at, they were not so serious as to hinder me, but the humans thought differently. Tender sensitivity meant slow, controlled actions on my part, lest a wince or other expression of even the slightest inconvenience bring down one of their irate healers. Not even among the doting of my own swarm had I ever experienced such a strange mix of care and hostility. I was reprimanded like a young child more than a few times 'for my own good'. I almost enjoyed the entire concept, as between it and the Tablet, I had an outlet to relieve the boredom. When I wasn't worrying the humans for my own amusement, I was resting, eating, or otherwise learning to better operate the body I was in. Apparently, once learned, the locomotion was easy, and their bodies surprisingly agile. I learned that second part more from observation than by experience. My mastery of walking was by no means complete even if I could move unhindered. More than a number of times did I find myself falling, and almost every time I found myself caught by a nurse conveniently placed near me. I just don't know how they did it. Yes, once free of the bed and armed with my little toy, I felt almost giddy, if not for the nagging powerlessness. Like a good changeling, I learned the body and 'recuperated' quickly enough to move about on my own. The Tablet kept me busy and even became a way for me to feign ignorance while I continued to examine my surroundings. Despite my freedom however, I kept near the room I'd been given. The place was the size of a castle or better and extremely busy. My cover was already delicate enough in my mind, and a poor turn of luck with some exploration could easily uncover my unfamiliarity with the environment. I was observant, but I knew I wouldn't last a minute under scrutiny. I guess that leads me to the next point. My 'discharge' from care. By the time a full week had gone by, I was mobile enough for my own liking, and apparently that of the healers. The suited human had shown up once more. He was some kind of government official intent on investigating my past. It didn't take me long to realize that the inane questions I'd been asked earlier in the week were actually part of a sophisticated identification process. That put my cover at risk. However, without a better understanding of where I was, and who or what these humans really were, I couldn't do anything more than play dumb. Of course, playing dumb is one of the easiest methods of deception. Still, it was frustrating to have no options at my disposal aside from waiting. Either my cover would hold, or it would fold under the scrutiny. Maybe luck was on my side at least for the day. My cover seemed to hold, though it was only the most flimsy of any deception I'd ever attempted. I had no identity, and apparently they had a lot of those types around to deal with, so I was simply another number on a sheet of paper to them. Before long I was being served the midday meal, and asked if I would be willing to accept temporary housing with a volunteer while an 'official identity' was created for me. With no other possible options, I went ahead and accepted. At the very least I knew and recognized what would be happening. That was better than taking my chances with more guessing games in a place I didn't yet understand. To my continued surprise, the human who'd found me was there once more, and I was escorted from that huge castle of a hospital into an area called simply a... parking lot. Imagine a large flat field made entirely of stone with small pebbles here and there, gray as volcanic ash and painted with white stripes. The humans had their metal chariots, cars I believe they were called... “I believe Mister... Lord Gazer said his was called a truck,” Nora pointed out with only a momentary pause. “Yes, Yes...” Chrysalis waved a hoof dismissively. “I was coming to that. It seems humans have several types of powered chariots they use. The general term for them was 'car' if I recall?” The queen cast her attention at the end of her question towards the drone. Gazer simply nodded in return while filling in for a moment. “Yeah,” he stated. “Just cars if you're not being specific. Like I said, mine was a larger type called a truck.” “Much larger,” Chrysalis stated in a serious tone. His car, or truck in this case, was a large red and black monstrosity. I wasn't fool enough to mistake it for a beast. Any pony or changeling with a set of eyes could see the wheels on it betraying its true nature. Still, it was enormous. The largest carts and chariots I'd ever seen in my days were simple affairs of wheels, wood, and teams of pullers. I honestly found myself curious just what magic was going to make such a huge work of metal and glass move on its own. Was my reaction to the 'engine' already explained? Well... Yes, it startled me. A sharp snarl and a growl have always been good signs that a nice, quick dodge was in order. Old reflexes, especially ones that keep you out of the jaws of a Cragodile, are quite hard to get rid of. Before you ask, no, Cragodile bites are not the reason for the holes in my legs. I won't bore you with mindless details about a truck ride, but I can say that after I recovered from my momentary humiliation, I found myself being instructed in detail the kind of horrors that awaited me if I was not properly... buckled up. Toby- that's Gazer's human name, which I had only learned shortly before -was so completely uninvolved in his words that for a moment I thought he might have been attempting to frighten me for a laugh. I can't say I believed myself for very long once he took control and started driving. Effortless and quick, that's how a human vehicle moves. The only thing I could do at first was try and control my own rising fear as it proved how much power was hidden just out of my sight. I couldn't feel any magic, but at that point I had dismissed my senses as lost. The only real way I managed to keep my cool at that moment was to point out to myself that Toby was completely at ease and looked to be in perfect control. I think he sensed my discomfort as well, as he did attempt small talk. It worked, if only just. But I had not been very forthcoming given my preoccupation with the vehicle's power. We changeling queens like power after all. Unfortunately, I think I lost myself a bit to the sensation. I made demands completely beyond any excuse my cover could provide, and even attempted to thrall him... silly as that is to do when one has no magic to access. And just like that, he broke my cover. I know it might not have looked like it from the outside, but after six hundred years, a changeling knows when she's been caught in a deception. And his tone screamed that he knew something. But the thing that ended up frustrating me most was how he immediately dropped it. I was left wondering if I'd misjudged what had just happened, or if he was playing his own cards close. Once again, I realized I was powerless in a completely unfamiliar place. It did rather ruin my mood. “And that pretty much brings us up to your old place,” Chrysalis turned her eyes back on Gazer. “Hit too close to home, didn't I?” Gazer asked. “You called me out and then let it drop,” Chrysalis frowned. “I thought I was about to be taken back to that case worker human and interrogated. But you did nothing.” “I admit, you tripped a couple of red flags,” the drone chuckled. “But I figured whole mess was more a fear thing than... Well... How often does a transforming bug-pony hybrid queen land in one's lap? Fancy?” Gazer turned slightly to the refined stallion, who blinked in surprise at being so suddenly addressed. “Eh... I'd say,” Fancy Pants made a show of thinking. “For humans that's likely somewhere between never, and not-at-all. I believe you told me there are no other sapient species besides humans where you're from.” “I wish I'd known that at the time,” Chrysalis muttered. “I could have eased up on the cover sooner.” Until my swarm came to Equestria, I lived in the tropics. I know heat. In fact, I could say with utmost certainty that I'm more well-versed in how to handle heat than Celestia's day guard. They honestly wouldn't last half an hour in buzz three conditions... But the heat I was experiencing in my new body even as Toby started pulling cases from the back of his truck was... Well, to be blunt for you Canterlot ponies, heat exhaustion cares not for status or money. Be grateful for the cool mountain air. Somehow, I'd already taken for granted how humans seemed to have their buildings maintain perfectly comfortable temperatures, and even Toby's vehicle had been blasting me with cold air for the entire ride. So I took more notice of that than ever before when I felt the body I was in rapidly growing sticky with sweat. Ugh... I don't know how ponies and humans handle the full body sweat thing. So disgusting... But I digress... The blast of cool air from the inside of Toby's abode caused me to almost rush past him in my own impatience to cool off. But given my near accident and the state of my ability to walk, I barely kept under control. Now... His home. Well, to describe the inside is to describe something that seems almost alive. It hummed, much as the hospital had done when it wasn't busy, but louder. There were blinking boxes everywhere, and tables covered in stuff I could only describe as arcane. One spot that was obviously a desk was dominated by three huge glowing pictures sitting side-by-side. For a second I thought I was already starting to suffer the symptoms of that infernal heat and cursed the weakness of my new body. But after a moment to remember the Tablet clutched to my chest, I realized I might be looking at more devices of similar nature. For the first time in days, I remember smiling. If you recall, I had assumed the Tablet to be common, but somewhat valuable thanks to the reactions of the nurse who saw it. The moment I realized what I was looking at, I knew I'd been taken in by someone who had to be considered quite well-off. It was like Princess Cadance's suite all over again, only without the horrible colors and I didn't have to trap anyone in a forgotten mine shaft. I still can't believe she was gullible enough to follow her own body-double right into a trap. Oh... Heh. I wish I could do it again, just to mess with her. But anyway... A thousand schemes popped into my head the moment I stepped into Toby's home. The moment after that they all fell apart because I had no idea where I would go with any of them. Where was I but in the middle of nowhere without my swarm. And without the swarm, what was the point to any of my ambitions? I was queen of a swarm of one in a body that was sticky from sweat and trapped in a land so far away from anything I recognized it might as well had been another world. I cursed the Elements. “No kidding. It's hotter than hell out there.” The human startled me out of my thoughts when he spoke. He was done arranging his cases near the door and had wandered over to a far wall to poke at a small box. It glowed like many of the other devices in the room before a suddenly loud click caused me to jump again. The click was quickly followed by a low rumble that joined the rest of the hum. “I've gotta' change that relay,” I heard him mumble. Of course, that didn't mean anything to me either so I turned my eyes back to gathering in my surroundings. Aside from the devices, you ponies would find it surprisingly familiar. The common area contained the usual things. A few chairs and couches, a table, also covered in the arcane... I decided I'd just call everything an arcane device, it's easier that way. The common area opened directly into a kitchen, surprisingly clean unlike every other surface I'd seen. Yet more devices whose purpose looked a little more obvious were placed neatly about. One such device looked like something that would be used to mix cake batter, but do it on its own. “You don't have to stand there, you know,” Toby told me as I looked around. He was pulling a strange, partially transparent box out of a corner and working to clear a table of its arcane contents. “Feel free to look around. The bathroom's through the door on the right. If you want, you can get cleaned up while I make some space for you. Just... If you don't know what it is, don't touch it. That goes double for plugs. Don't unplug anything unless you ask me first.” I found the warning slightly insulting, but I masked my distaste better this time. I was a queen. A few centuries in a jungle will teach one very quickly not to touch anything you couldn't identify, or have a worker identify for you. I don't think he meant that for my protection though. Call it one of my early hunches. The offer to get cleaned up sounded good though, so I decided to make use of the human's bathroom first. In my week in the hospital, I'd easily learned the basics of human hygiene. No self-respecting changeling would be caught alive not trying to learn everything they could about the form they took, and despite some nasty rumors floating among ponies, I assure you we are very clean. Cleaner... in-fact. A changeling's sense of smell far outstrips anything a pony can detect. But it is not so much the odor that bothers us, but the fact that certain methods of communication become difficult when you garble it with garbage. I won't get into that. But I should also mention, smell attracts predators in the jungle, and dirty changeling is a dead changeling. So I was quite pleased to discover that humans also considered cleanliness an essential aspect of good health. Their cleaning utilities are similar enough to those of ponies that I had no trouble learning how to use them. Also, endless hot water... “When are we getting a hot tub?” Chrysalis suddenly turned her attention to Gazer. “I long for a nice soak and I'm sure it would melt some of that tension right out of you.” “Water heating's expensive business,” the drone replied, his wings cycling between closed and open. “We could build one now, but the power use on it would be a waste-” “It's not a waste if we're enjoying it,” Chrysalis rolled her eyes. “COMPARED...” the drone raised his voice to talk over the queen. “...to powering the rest of the resort for our guests. Maybe if we can get approval from Luna for funding the solar thermal. But I don't want to push out a list of wants before we've even managed to prove this island can work.” “It'll work,” Chrysalis waved a hoof dismissively. “My- Our changelings will ensure it. So there's really nothing to worry about.” “Yes,” Fancy Pants decided to chime in upon seeing the direction the conversation was going. “I'm sure it will. But remember that while we know it will work, it is your benefactors you must impress with this endeavor Your Highness. And while you have my utmost confidence as the chief investor, you are trying to win the approval of those whom you've spurned. I caution you to at least take that seriously. This whole mess is a shot in the dark.” “Yes, I know,” Chrysalis sighed. “You both have a habit of repeating yourselves endlessly about this.” “They're only doing it because they care,” Fleur spoke up with a soft smile. “Gag me,” the queen made a face. But after a moment it faltered and she quickly distracted herself by pouring another glass of wine. “Fancy, hit me,” Gazer raised his sippy-cup up where the unicorn could see it. However, a green aura enveloped it and yanked it towards the queen. “I've got it,” she stated aggressively. The lid immediately twisted off and she began pouring wine into the cup. “I wanted juice,” the drone pointed out in irritation, causing Chrysalis to cease pouring and look up silently. After a few silent glances around the fire and then down at the half-filled cup, she quickly turned it up and chugged what she had poured, ending with a noisy gasp. “Best let me,” Fancy gently took the freshly emptied cup and began filling it with more juice. “Right,” Chrysalis shook her head. “I forgot you're a wimp.” “I HATE alcohol,” the drone frowned. “That doesn't make me a wimp.” “No,” the queen suddenly smirked. “But this next part does.” Time for a lesson in human social etiquette. Humans wear clothes. Mostly it's because, as you saw, they're rather soft and squishy. So they don't do well in cooler places and are easily given even the most superficial of injuries. However, apparently their society had formed a kind of taboo to the concept over the ages. It seems, nudity is a sign of intimacy and it's part of their mating ritual to show bare skin off to others. All I knew at the time was that it was chilly in the hospital if I didn't wear something to cover the skin. However, after taking a bath, I realized that I would just get dirty again if I put the same clothing I'd been wearing back on. So rather than get myself dirty all over again, I decided I needed something fresh. I almost thought I'd broke him. I approached Toby while he was staring into the three glowing panels at his desk. “Do you have something clea-?” “SONUVA!” I have no idea what that means and he won't tell me, but he says it when he's startled. And apparently, because of the social taboo, I'd done quite an excellent job of it just by walking up to him as naked as the day I hatched. He even fell over out of the chair he was in. It was so confusing at the time that I even momentarily forgot to keep my cover. “What is wrong with you?!” I snapped at the floor where he lay. “G- Go put some clothes on!” he seemed just as outraged as I was. “What?” I had asked. “Why would I continue wearing those dirty garments? Do you have anything clean?” I don't think he knew quite how to respond. I recognized fluster easily enough from any creature being showered with unexpected affection, but I wasn't even making the attempt. I just wanted something that wasn't going to be sticky, or start smelling in a few hours. “Go-,” he began for a moment, then he seemed to collect himself. “Go wait in the bathroom and I'll see what I can find.” I found myself scowling at him and his unusually strange behavior, but I just wrote it off as humans being humans. It was easy enough to comply and the bathroom WAS a bit warmer. I ended up not waiting long. But I still found his behavior confusing. He cracked the door open , placed several garments on the counter, and shut it. “Let me know when you're decent...” 'Decent'... I'd heard the term refer to ponies, especially the elite, when they thought they looked okay. Was I somehow ugly without clothes? It was something my inner-changeling decided could be looked into later. If there was a way to use my bare skin to manipulate humans, that would be to my advantage. Dressing wasn't too difficult. It's harder without magic, but I'd learned from the nurses what went where. The garments were obviously meant for Toby, but fit me with room to spare. When I was finished, I found myself in the most boring set of garments I'd ever seen. It would have to do. When I was... 'decent', I exited the bathroom to find the human once more gazing at his glowing displays. In the relative silence I noticed there was the faintest little snapping noise occurring. Curiosity getting the better of me, I silently walked over and took a look. Much like the Tablet, it did many different things, but the most curious was the arrow that seemed to be moving around all on its own. There was much to read, and pictures of strange items, but nothing really made sense as the image kept switching out before I could really get a feel for it. “What are you doing?” I startled him again, but he kept silent despite one of his hands jerking out and grabbing the desk. He wouldn't last five minutes in the jungle like that. Rather disappointing really. Shining Armor at least could sense when something was sneaking up on him. “Just...” he began, looking back at me. Then he seemed to relax a little. “I'm just ordering a relay for my AC unit. Do the clothes fit?” Deciding to keep an even mask, I simply smiled and nodded. “Good,” he stood up... That's when I realized for the first time that I was shorter than he was. As a queen, I've gotten a little used to being taller than all other changelings, as well as most ponies. So seeing a male creature capable of intelligent conversation that was larger than me left me a bit surprised. Of course, minotaurs count, but I had yet to meet them at the time. “I guess,” he continued. “Since you don't have... well... anything, and apparently since the hospital didn't bother to tell me you only had some donation clothes, we get to hit the store.” I kept my neutral expression. “We're going to need...” he turned back and all but flopped into his chair. A second later the displays started to act as if being manipulated, then turned white and plain blocky text started to appear as he rapidly tapped on a small arcane device I hadn't noticed before. “Clothes,” he muttered. “Seven sets at least. Socks, shirts, pants...” there was a pause as he turned and glanced me up and down. “Shoes...” he continued at length, then seemed to hesitate on the next two words. “Underwear... Bra-...s. Please tell me you already know your size.” “Size for what?” I asked honestly enough. No, seriously, size for what? The tapping stopped and he seemed to shift in his chair before sighing. “Right...” he continued tapping again. “The whole kitten-caboodle... including tax, title, and license...” I held my expression at neutral despite my thoughts screaming for answers. I'd learn what he was going on about soon enough. I was a changeling queen and already made far too many mistakes. I wasn't about to blow it again on idle curiosity that would be satisfied before long. I just wish I had a little more self control at times. Because he finished up what he was doing and turned to pick my Tablet up off the desk. When I saw it, I practically knocked him down to take it. I wasn't about to lose it after all. “Whoa!” he snapped in surprise. “Lad- Christy, what are you-” I simply hugged the arcane device to my chest and shot him a glare. “Eh-” he blinked. “No, that one's mine. Yours is where you left it...” He pointed and I followed his extended arm to a spot where I'd set the... MY Tablet previously, a small table next to the couch. I glanced down at the tablet I was holding, realizing it did actually look slightly different. Normally, I wouldn't feel the least bit embarrassed at my actions, but I couldn't help but feel my face flush in response to such a foolish mistake. “Oh,” I muttered weakly. Apologies were never really my thing, being queen and all. Usually I was the one receiving them when a worker made a mistake. It took a moment to fight my reflexes, but gave the device up after Toby sat there patiently holding his hand out. Once he had it back, he quickly performed an action I recognized as 'plugging in'. But strangely enough, he didn't plug it into the Wall Socket, but rather a strange box sitting under the desk. I allowed myself to lean a little on my curiosity to see what he did. Honestly, after fifteen seconds, he was done and I had no clue. It was like a slap in the face. “Okay,” he continued after a moment. “So-” he paused and glanced back at his displays. “- tomorrow. We head into town and hit up Wally-World... Find out what fits you, get you some clothes, grab some food and then we'll see about setting up the guest room.” I had no idea what this 'Wally-World' was, but it sounded like something ponies would cook up. That made me scowl in reflection. I was in this situation because- No. NO! I was not going to dwell on that. I was cast here by the artifacts. I had no option but to comply. Comply... Before I knew it I was seething in rage. No magic, no swarm, trapped in a body that got disgusting in hours... Sent to a place where I was so in my element it was childish, yet out of my element that I was deemed helpless? Was this some kind of joke? Were the Elements playing some kind of twisted retribution on me? Was it 'I was queen, so make me a peasant to teach me a lesson'?! And I was expected to just sit here and comply with it!?! It clicked. That was it, wasn't it? The Elements of Harmony zapped me to some other-where and stripped me of everything that made me... well, ME! Oh the irony... The disgusting, poetic irony of it all! Me! queen of the changelings! The master of a race of creatures able to assume any identity at will, stripped of my own identity and my ability to assume others and forced to play a role for which my only choice was to ad-lib my way through it and hope I could pull it off! It had a sick humor all its own. Artifacts are like that after all. You see, they enjoy puzzles. Being practically eternal, and having a will but not quite a mind, they play games. Games that span millennia and make queens such as myself into mere pawns without the slightest care of the stakes, but games none-the-less. And the Elements of Harmony had the rules of the game practically written right in their name. I laughed. I didn't care about my cover for a moment as it dawned on me. I was the player in a game of the Element's making. My goal? Probably to prove I was worthy of the title 'Queen of the Changelings' and live 'in harmony' with the beings I'd been thrust upon, all the while being the most alien thing among them. It was so obvious I almost expected to find myself yanked back to Equestria just for figuring it out. But no such luck... “The She Hulk and Harley Quinn impersonation's really starting to creep me out y'know...” I came back to reality with a start. Toby was staring at me with a look of unease and I was practically draped over his chair from my epiphany. I may have figured out the game, but I was still just a piece on the board. Or maybe I should say it was more like a card game. I finally knew what cards I had, but if I wanted to win, I needed to know everyone else's. Yes, I've played poker before... Unfortunately, despite my prowess as a changeling, I'm told I have a terrible poker face. Needless to say, I had to sooth the human's unease before he thought I'd gone insane. The humans had cleared me of such a thing at the hospital, but I didn't want it to come into question again. “Sorry,” I bought time with what I hoped was a sheepish flush, part real, part act. “I... I realized something that made me angry, and then realized something else that went with it... And it was, sort of funny.” The best lie is the one that contains the truth. Toby kept his face the same. Did he not buy it? “Yeah...” he began at almost excruciating length. And then he turned away to face his arcane displays again. I could have gone for a response... ANY response really. Belief, disbelief, accusations, whatever. But this way he had where he'd just drop something and leave me guessing... I would have to learn how to read him, and quickly. “So,” he finally continued. “In the morning, we'll get up and go get your stuff. We'd go now, but I've got a couple more errands to run but every thing's already closed. And I'm not in the mood to waste gas with the price of diesel lately.” What was 'diesel'? And why was its price so important? I had a lot of learning to do in a short amount of time. A quick glance around the room reinforced that thought. So many arcane devices blinked back at me. His arcane displays, an object by the couch that looked like it might be another one of them, but dormant. Actually, now that I knew what to look for, several more of the arcane devices looked like they might have a display incorporated into them. Even the most perplexing of magics had a reason to it after all. “Wow,” Crystal Clear chimed in, interrupting the queen. “You figured that all out that fast?” “She'd like you to think that,” Gazer chuckled from his sippy-cup. “She's clever, but not quite THAT clever.” “Yes,” Chrysalis pouted slightly. “It took me a week just to realize what had really happened. For a queen of my experience, that would be unacceptable. Artifacts are known for attacking one through their hubris when they play their games. Your elements are no different.” “So you believed the Elements of Harmony were playing a game?” Nora asked. “That seems a little.. Well, that seems so unlike what I've heard of them.” “That, Lady Stonewall,” Chrysalis stated in her most regal tone. “Is because the elements LIKE you ponies. As I said before, an artifact that does nothing is one that is content. If you consider that Celestia has only ever used them in defense of your kind, it goes without saying that anything that would upset that status quo would be in for a very unpleasant experience. Ask Princess Luna about her experience later. She's due in some time after sunset.” “I'll keep that in mind,” the administrator nodded. “Though I must ask, how did the rest of your day go after you had your little epiphany? It sounded like it was only mid-afternoon.” “Quite boring actually,” Chrysalis rolled her eyes. “I occupied myself with my Tablet's Time-Wasters up until fatigue caught up with me. I was a bit bored with the Zombie one, so I tried experimenting with one about matching gems.” “You played three-hundred games,” Gazer pointed out. Chrysalis looked up in a gape. “You kept count?!” “No,” he smirked. “Bejeweled Blitz is a one-minute game. You played it for FIVE HOURS.” “Bah!” Chrysalis leaned back and finished the wine glass she'd been neglecting. “You and math...” “Math is awesome,” the drone grinned back. “I can do anything with it.” “Except cook,” Chrysalis fired back. “I can cook!” Gazer shot defensively. “If one doesn't mind bland and tasteless,” the queen smirked. “I don't know how you lived on stuff so boring.” “It's not boring miss, 'I hate sweet things',” the drone growled back. “Aren't we like, bug ponies or something? Shouldn't sugar be something like your second all time favorite food after magic gained from love?” “We are changelings,” she shook her head. “Not common insects. And I can't stand sweet. At least, not what anyone around here calls sweet.” The queen shuddered, her wings twitching and then settling. “Never touching one of those apples fritters ever again...” she muttered, then scowled. “Great, I can taste it just thinking about it... I need something to flush that out.” The queen's horn glowed for a moment and a slice of pizza hovered its way over to her. Thankfully, the aroma was much less intense now that the pie had time to cool. But Gazer mimed a gag all the same. In response, Chrysalis just took a large bite and then opened her mouth to let the cheese string across her teeth and fangs. This got an audible sigh from Fleur, who rubbed a hoof on her temple in frustration, and a silent roll of the eyes from Fancy Pants. Their Canterlot guests in the mean time just blanched at the queen's deliberately bad manners. Chrysalis, seeing the reaction, frowned before snapping her mouth shut and swallowing audibly. “Spoilsports,” she muttered. “So what happened next?” Crystal piped up in curiosity. “What was... 'Wally-World'? Sounds weird.” Gazer turned his eyes on Chrysalis, who was busy on her second bite. “You want to tell them about that?” he asked. “Or would you rather I explain a supermarket?” “I'm eating,” the queen said between chews, and flicked her hoof as if shooing the slightly smaller changeling along. “So it's your turn now.” “Fair enough.” Gazer shook his head. “So... Yeah, let me put this one in perspective...”