//------------------------------// // The Hunt Is On // Story: Heroes, Villains and the Useless Guys // by Nameless Narrator //------------------------------// The throne room of the ancient pony capital city now serving as the main changeling hive was for once buzzing, literally, with action. Queen Chrysalis was sitting on her throne, listening to reports and other important information being brought by her subordinates. "I've got it! A brothel!" some of her changelings jumped at her sudden outburst of laughter. "Well, no... the place was actually a kitchen but close enough," said the unfortunate buggy giving the current briefing on an unimportant situation in some unimportant city. "What are you rambling about?" "Well, my Queen, we infiltrated the Canterlot castle-" "You mean one of you got a job as a cook?" "Erm... yes. But I mean your guess was good too," continued the suicidal changeling. "As... a... cook...? Changeling...?" the queen kept trying to understand the situation. Unfortunately, the more she did the more the images of the exploding, melting, evaporating or being sucked into another dimension castle assaulted her head. As the silence spread through the throne room the changeling began sweating which would have amazed the queen who knew that her kind was physically incapable of such feat if her mind wasn't occupied by an image of a lonely drone holding a piece of toast surrounded by burning ruins of once proud pony city. The ultimate question arose - were alicorns immortal enough to survive a changeling cook? "I might reconsider giving one-eighty-nine the job," the reporting ling began backing away, slowly at first but gaining speed as he got closer to the exit. "You do that," mumbled the queen in thought, "Now, before Celestia accuses us of an assassination attempt I have a need for the best changeling for the purposes of building dwellings." "That would be me," one of the assembled black creatures raised a hoof, "I can produce up to twenty litres of green goo at a minimal love cost." Normally, the queen would compliment the tubby changeling almost leaking green from his pores, today's mission unfortunately required a little more finesse than just making huge globs and hollowing them out. If this was the best her hive could offer then she was considering not feeding anyone incapable of feeding himself. There was literally zero chance of any pony, dragon or any desperately horny creature visiting a giant green cocoon and maintaining their original purpose. The queen levitated a green, gelatinous tablet mimicking paper and wrote a short message on it. In the second she was going to tell a changeling to take it a draft of air came from one of the broken ornate windows of the long hall and brought with it a grey pegasus looking at the queen and probably admiring the ancient ceiling at the same time. "Derpy's here to take your mail, give it here and I will bail," said the pegasus energetically. The queen could do nothing else than wordlessly levitate the tablet to the mailmare who snatched it and flew away with in in her mouth. Reevaluating the alliance with ponies, Chrysalis thought for the first time in ages she might be toying with forces she can't understand. Emmet Baptista Dishwasher Cross was having trouble remembering his name after his recent attempt at reigning in the power of his beloved commander. Despite him sleeping for almost three days straight he was glad for being able to move with relative ease. What was keeping him warm even as a thin layer of snow blanketed the camp was the knowledge that everyone around him was safe and that Shadowstep herself had been having trouble dealing with him. He'd lost, of course, as there was no mundane being capable of going head-on against a fed queen-type changeling but his experience and quick thinking had made the gap between them surprisingly close during the fight. Right now he was sitting at the table next to the fire pit with hooves wrapped around a hot cup of tea. He was the only one outside but he didn't mind, someone had to stand guard no matter what. "Morning!" a male voice greeted the dizzy batpony-changeling, leaving no doubt about its owner. "Good morning. prince. Fancy seeing you outside this early." "It's nice not having to comb my mane for three hours to please foreign dignitaries. On the other hoof, you look like a leftover dinner." "Thank you for the compliment." "That wasn't one." "Still better than what Starlight said when I woke her up an hour ago." Shining looked around at the snow and slight drizzle in the air. "Damn, I wouldn't have been friendly as well if you woke me up that early." "Well, I didn't want to cause an interspecies incident." *THUMP* "MAAAAAAAAAIL!" a grey passing blur yelled right after something made a small crater in the snow. "A sturdy one, that grey pegasus is," commented Cross and picked up what looked like a green glob. "A tired Cross, this morning is," Shining grinned. "No teeth, the prince shall soon have." "A copyright lawsuit befall us, it soon will." They shared a short laugh and Cross opened the flaps of Shadowstep's tent. Well, he tried to before he got flung away by a purple spark. "Oookay," Shining raised his eyebrows. Unfortunately him being a novice in this conversation martial art strategy meant his attempt at gaining more information failed, "I guess your commander isn't on duty at the moment." "Why don't YOU go and find out for yourself?" Cross mumbled while examining the contents of the mail. In the end he threw it at meteoric speed into Shadowstep's tent. "I don't want to end up looking like you." "At my age? You'll be begging to look like me in mere fifty years." "Pfff, my wife is an alicorn of Love. I'm gonna get turned into a talking vibrator at the blessed age of thirty-five an live forever with her." "I wonder how long does it take for a sex toy to go insane," chuckled Cross to himself, "And how does one notice." "Hmm?" "I asked if you were interested in some combat practice to pass time, a game if you will." "Oooh okay? Sounds fun but I'm feeling I should be careful around you." "Do you know Damp Prisons and Firebreathing Lizards?" "Boy do I? I still have the character sheet for my DPnFL pegasus paladin. We used to spend ages going through the Eye of The Mind Flyer campaign in my recruit days. Damn... was Lay on Hooves really so OP in those days or am I just nostalgic?" "Yeah, it was. They scrapped it hard in 3.5 edition." "Yeah... they did." The twin dreamy smiles and nostalgic sighs were interrupted by a yell from Starlight's tent. "NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERDS!" "Nevermind her, she doesn't understand the value of good combat practice," snorted Cross. "Gotta stand with her on this one. As much as I enjoyed playing we didn't get much done. I think that my scrubbing the latrines for thirty hours straight after we pissed off our officer too much is the cause of my fear of chilli." "Oh well," Cross grinned, "I happen to add my personal touch to the campaign. Wanna go through the tutorial? It's fun." "I think I know the rulebook by heart but yeah. Show me what you've got, changeling." Cross' grin grew increasingly sadistic when he began narrating. "You find yourself in the dungeon of Khal'Atar. As a paladin, you were able to identify the necromantic robes of Ur'Gash cultists before they captured you. The residual energy in the crypt is enough for a pile of bones to begin forming into a skeleton pony in front of your eyes. Fortunately for you, you are strong enough to break the shackles fast enough to stand the heartless, literally, abomination eye to eye. Your action?" "FIGHT! Got a pair of dice?" "Not so fast. I said I added my personal touch to the... combat practice." In a burst of green fire Cross turned into a real skeleton pony with a rusty cutlass held in his mouth. Shining's nerdboner would have been visible from the moon without any special equipment that morning. "THIS IS GONNA BE AWESOME!" "You think this is cool? Wait till we persuade Starlight to do a succubus for you." "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!" The 'squeee'-ing prince ran to his tent to get his weapon. The amethyst queen, half resting and half sulking, picked up the green tablet Cross had thrown into her tent before and read it. "Too tired for this crap," she burned away the thing in a burst of purple fire and glared at the tent flaps. "Why are you so strong, my little sargeant? What drives you forward?" Cross might not remember but she did. She had given him his name, she had carried him from the burning laboratory and now it was her who, if she were a true queen with a hive, would have to be scared of him. Living for centuries, the changeling queens had the experience and power to expand the first and keep the latter and not a single one of them had ever dared to let her successor grow freely. Every single one of them had clipped the wings of their heir until they were ready to leave this world. Up until now when there was one who was curious enough to let the little flame of power grow and watch it devour everything. It might take centuries, it might be sooner but if things kept going like they had been then Cross would become the most powerful being known to this world. For now, though, Shadowstep would let him play his silly game and keep observing and nurturing him. Only time would tell if her idea was a horrible mistake or not. At the moment she was just an unknown commander of an equally unknown group of changelings. She closed her eyes. She opened her eyes. "Yes? I mean... I WILL HAVE YOU COURT MARSHALLED, CROSS, FOR WAKING UP A SUPERIOR OFFICER WHEN SHE'S TOO TIRED! Putting combat ability of the unit at risk and whatnot." "That's the point, commander," came from outside of the tent, "Prince Shining Armor agreed to my idea of organizing a hunt on the guys supposed to watch us to gain some love and practice." Shadowstep poked her frazzled head out of the flaps. "Sounds pretty goo, eerm- Do not listen to the wailing of the perverted banshee, Cross! He groped me." "I WAS HALF-ASLEEP!" exclaimed Shining. "Likely story, perv. My rump is still sore from- YES, YES, DEVOUR OUR ENEMIES!" "No killing, commander. Peace treaty rules. By the way, are you feeling okay?" "Hah! I will not discern any vital secrets, body snatcher!" "That's better, commander," Cross turned to the only still closed tent, "Starlight, get your lazy ass out here or you don't get to have your pick at who you hunt tonight." "Not interested!" "Three hot hunks, two earthponies, one pegasus!" *Puff* "Standing at attention!" "Pop a scrying spell on that hill," he pointed in the direction of the pony encampment, "and you get the first pick." A misty screen appeared in front of the three changelings and one unicorn and slowly gained focus, revealing four different figures chatting. Shadowstep narrowed her eyes when she saw the assassin from few days ago and in response the spell focused on the orange, blue-maned pegasus. "Flash Sentry," Shining examined the picture, "I think Cadence sent him here to keep an eye on me. No idea why thought, that guy's dumber than a pile of bricks. A bimbo magnet, I must admit." Shadowstep opened her mouth. "MIIINE!" screeched Starlight. Shadowstep closed her mouth. "My point exactly," commented Shining and the vision focused on a pony similar to him, "Heavy Hoof. I don't know much about him aside from him being one of the weapon experts of Canterlot Royal Guard, staff I think. Sort of an all-round genius." "I might need some weapon practice," Cross looked at the vision thoughtfully, "No offense, prince." "None taken. Weapons aren't exactly my expertise otherwise my name would be Shining Big Bucking Sword." The vision skipped a changeling drone working hard at preparing lunch under the oversight of Heavy Hoof and focused at the last member of the pony camp. Shadowstep growled. She knew she was awful at magic outside of possessing a massive amount of raw power, a trait belonging to all queens, but even she could recognize a golem if she saw one. To her eyes the Blackguard was covered in dark magic signalizing an unparalelled knowledge of ancient spells resulting in his creation. That thing was dangerous. "A foe worthy of my attention," she said sharply. "That's one of king Sombra's creations. They obey whoever they are told to obey and I'm sure Caddy sent him here to protect me and Flash just got mixed in it somehow. There is no love to steal from him." "Who said anything about feeding from it?" grunted Shadowstep to herself. "That was quiet but almost... coherent?" commented Shining. "Big stallion, lots of love to give." "But I said-" "Be quiet, banshee!" "Riiiight..." "Shall we continue, my game master?" asked Shining Armor the thoughtful batling after everyone had left the briefing. "Later, paladin!" Cross grinned suddenly, "I have to get my blood flowing to hunt in this snow and cold." "What's wrong?" "Something feels off... about all this. Chrysalis' order from this morning seems stupidly pointless unless there's more then meets the eye. I just can't help myself but think that all of us will have a role to play soon," Cross ended up mumbling to himself. "Wow. You almost sound like your commander." "That's what worries me." Contrary to the rest of the group, Starlight was having all the fun with none of the worry. For a mage of her caliber the memory was not enough and she needed to skim through her spellbook to prepare what would be the most useful from the more complicated spells. "Mind control, charm, submission magic," she grinned at the impending future of the orange pegasus, "Ooooh, fertility spell, it's been a while, my old friend." Humming a cheerful tune, she brushed her mane while reading up on the spell details. "I might be the one feeding but there's no reason for both of us not to enjoy ourselves. Once I put you in your place, that is. Now for the outfit..." Several chests full of clothes opened themselves. Not always there has been a chance for a changeling to change her form magically and at those times the full containers were a life-saver. Going through the assembled cloth articles she smacked her lips at the sight of something grey and shiny. "Prince Shiiiiniiing!" she yelled outside, "A moment of your time, puh-leeeease!" Shining's eyes crossed when he heard the whiny voice but he didn't want to be rude. He hoped Starlight had learned after last few times she didn't have a chance with him but the mare was stubborn as a mule. Fortunately, moments like these had their bright side since she did have a body to die for... multiple times over. Shining's blood, however, had difficult time deciding its direction when he entered the tent and was greeted by sight of two white and fleshy half-moons separated only by a thin strap of cloth strained to its limit. A thought of infidelity crossed his mind, then one more and then stopped after seeing the imaginary glare of his wife. In all honesty, he doubted Cadence could use her 'there is nopony sexier than the alicorn of Love' excuse this time. The rump moved away from his face, revealing Starlight's head rammed into one of the ornate chests. "Oh, that was quick, my lord and conqueror," she purred. "You mean that face-down-rump-up pose was totally not intentional?" Shining pursed his lips. "For once, yes, a complete accident," Starlight's tail brushed on Shining's nose, "So... how do you like it?" "It's a thong that's dangerously close to snapping and taking somepony's eye out. Combined with your... bountiful posterior I think it's a deadly weapon more than a piece of clothing." "Hmmm," Starlight grumbled in disappointment, "I guess I might need a bit more protection tonight." "Oh, it's for the hunt? Then yes, definitely-" The indecent clothing slipped off and Shining found himself thanking Celestia for the jealousy of his wife as her angry face was the cold shower he so desperately needed right now. Well, more an approaching glacier bringing with it the shattered remains of the one responsible for tempting him. Shining knew he wouldn't be the target of Cadence's wrath, only an innocent collateral casualty. "Amount of blood left in the upper body - 37%," Shining's eyes flashed blue and an error message appeared. "Don't be such a foal, my owner and master," grinned Starlight sadistically and slid something else on her bottom. "Error 404, blood not found." It was clothing, in theory and when the definition was stretched more than the little string it was describing. In reality it was a solitary, hair-thin metallic wire leading from Starlight's tail lower and lower- "Oh darling, your nose seems to be bleeding." "T-t-that is supposed to be MORE protection?" Shining's eyes stopped glowing and with a clinking tune some intelligence returned home from a very memorable holiday. "Of course! Basic rule of female armor - the less practical and the more revealing the armor is, the more effective it gets." Shining remembered the good old recruit days spent playing DPnFL and the female characters some of his friends seemed to play. "Eeh, I thought it was just because we were young, spotty and locked in the company of twenty other colts that-" "Don't believe me? Try it out," Starlight wiggled her butt again, lowering Shining's IQ to single digits. "Bad idea, my wife, doom of the entire world..." "Too bad, here it comes!" Starlight's rump approached Shining's face at breakneck speed. Shining was expecting the jiggly mounds to gently brush on his face, he was expecting Starlight to try some other method to finally make him go crazy and he was expecting to get hit by the muscles surely hidden under the soft surface, Starlight was a soldier, after all. What he WASN'T expecting was being hit by a wrecking ball made of steel and having half of his front teeth chipped almost instantly. "Fwe feck?" "My apologies," Starlight turned around and aimed her horn at his mouth, "Now be a good mare and take it whole." Shining's eyes bulged when she rammed her horn into his mouth through the empty window that used to be his front teeth. Only a flash of blue and a tingly feeling followed before she pulled back and smiled at him. "The heck?" Shining rammed his hoof into his mouth and began licking his restored chompers. "Another demonstration?" Starlight wiggled her bottom again. ยจ This time Shining didn't hesitate and slapped it as hard as he could. "YEOW!" he screamed and kept shaking his hoof in disbelief, "That's crazy." "Nope, that's science," she dove into her chest again, pulled out a thin tiara and put it on her head, "Now, I've got a hammer somewhere around, can you help-" "I BELIEVE YOU!" Starlight blew him a kiss. "Thank you for your valuable input, maybe some day you'll have more to put in than just your words." Shining, seeing a chance at finally leaving, had something on his mind though. "You know... I think the female Crystal Guard uniform might need an upgrade... to go with the times and advances in clothing... science." "I'll be sure to model the best ideas just for you, ta-ta," Starlight waved him off. While Shining was busy trying not to trip on his way back to the tent, Starlight grinning in delight at her next idea aimed at Flash, Shadowstep having prophetic dreams, applying night-combat makeup and changing her eyes to have infrared targeting capabilities and Cross running off to the forest to practice against some hydras, in the pony encampment things were slightly less hectic. "Noooow you stir in some pepper and salt," guided Heavy the little changeling drone responsible for helping them survive the first few days, "It's better to add it earlier so you can improve the flavor later as you want." "Thanks, mister," said Six, stirring the pot on the fire "I might be the first hive changeling that knows how to cook. Buut I have to do something else now. Can I just tell the food to wait till I come back?" Heavy smiled. The innocent attitude of the little drone was keeping him warm during these winter days. He didn't know what the plan of whoever sent it here was but he had to admit that if the creature was an infiltrator it was a great one. "I'll take care of that," he took the ladle from Six's hooves, "What's bugging, no offense, you?" "Ooo, nice one. I got a letter earlier today, it's a mission from the queen." "From Chrysalis personally? That's got to be quite an honor, right?" "It is, too bad it wasn't addressed to me but I guess since it got here I might take care of it anyway. Earn some smiley stickers, you know." "Can I help?" "No, thanks. I'll go ask the big guys down there about detals," Six pointed at the seemingly empty changeling camp. When the drone skittered away Heavy just kept on stirring. He didn't like the idea of a direct order from the changeling queen but since Six wasn't trying to hide anything he decided no to push it. Besides, somepony had to make the food. Blackie didn't need to eat, apparently and Flash definitely didn't deserve to but they had been both sent by princess Cadence to safeguard her husband so the least he could do was to keep them alive. Six passed the invisible alarm barrier around the camp without any problems and reached the firepit. The strange thing was that noone tried to see who the invader was. "Crazy lady! Sargeant! Miss magician!" Nothing. "Anyone?" Trying to get inside Shadowstep's tent proved pointless as a low growl from inside gave Six the exact order of staying the heck away as a written threat would. Starlight's tent was surrounded by an impenetrable shield and Cross' tent was empty, well, devoid of him at least. Six really didn't want to offend the foreign dignitary guest in the camp so it just sat down at the table and began fiddling with the holes in its hooves. "Can I help you? Everypony around is busy right now," a white unicorn with blue mane said cheerily. "Prince Shining Armor?" Six's mouth opened, "I-I really don't want to bother you. I just wanted to ask the others if they knew their way around town." "Well, my sister lives down there and I visit her from time to time. You can ask me anything." "Well you see, I need to find a big house to buy or rent for some sort of project the queen wants to get going in Ponyville." Shining didn't like the idea of Chrysalis' project as well, whatever it might be, and decided that keeping an eye on it might be helpful. "The really big houses are usually rented by the town officials. You know what? I can come with you if it's not a problem and we can talk to Mayor Mare together." "Hey, thanks!" Six giggled happily, "That would really help." Shining put his official armor on and they headed to the Ponyville town hall. "Not happening," Mayor Mare shook her silvery mane at the proposal. "It's just about twenty or thirty changelings trying to buy a house and renovate it. We've got the money," pleaded Six. "No! I don't care for what unholy purpose you want to use it but the last time changelings were in Ponyville most of us ended in green cocoons. Also-" "Also," interrupted Shining, "The decree of princess Celestia orders you to give the changelings a chance so if there is an unused building of said specifications I see no problem in letting them rent or buy it." The mayor gritted her teeth. "What would the purpose of that estabilishment be? In the unlikely case I agreed to your offer." "A brothel!" Six grinned. "WHAT?" "WHAT?" "Well, we, as changelings, are pretty good at fulfilling certain fantasies so the queen decided it would be a great way to feed without having to hurt anyone and earn a bit of cash towards helping the less fortunate of our brethren." "Here... as in: here in Ponyville? Why not Canterlot, or Manehattan? There's a lot of ponies there and many more potential clients," Mayor Mare tried to wrap her head around the idea. "I dunno." "Erm..." "No idea. The queen just wants it here. Oh right, she said that a part of profits would go to Ponyville treasury if you decided to sell the house instead of renting it. You could also entertain foreign hotshots and get to know them." "I'm sure the mayor sees this opportunity as her duty to help Ponyville grow," Shining helped, "And there might be a hefty bonus to her payroll for mediating such a great deal. That would of course increase the tourism in Ponyville as well." "Yes yes, it indeed is my duty to help Ponyville grow and what better way to do it than by showing how tolerant we are. You guys can change into anything, right?" "As long as it is roughly our size, yes," Six's eyes gleamed, "And we don't judge any fantasy." "FOR TOURISM!" Mayor Mare smiled triumphantly and stamped her official seal on a deed to a small, unused mansion. There may be some moral outrage later from some less open-minded ponies but one should always be helpful and believe in the improvement of ponykind, just like Mayor Mare did. And who knows... maybe, when the time is right, she might just invite some of her friends from Canterlot to show them the miracle of interpecies cooperation and earn some points towards next Grand Galloping Gala. "Thanks for the help, mister Shining. This is going to be amazing," said Six. "I'm afraid so." "All that love to eat without having to run afterwards. Miss Mayor is really a forward-thinking pony, isn't she?" "I'm afraid so." "She's doing it just for herself, am I right?" "I'm afraid so." "Why did you help then?" Six tilted its head. "If this failed then Chrysalis would just do someting even dumber, right?" Shining sighed. "I'm afraid so," Six nodded. "How can you say that? Frogurt CLEARLY, as it is stated in the table of contents, is different from frozen yoghurt. You can't just change the name and keep selling the thing. It has to adhere to norms and dietary rules!" yelled a voice inside the town hall. "Three," said Shining out of nowhere. "IT IS NOT THE SAME THING! Griffon Empire has strict rules about the subject while all you have to show for yourself is a cutie mark that might be misinterpreted, I mean - interpreted correctly, AS A BLENDER!" "Two." "What are you counting?" asked Six. "Inevitability," Shining moved from underneath the window from which the voice was coming. "It's 38% milk, you're selling it with 32% milk. That's a SCAM! What if the griffon emperor comes to Ponyville and wants his favourite treat, eh? You're going to be hanging for the 6% of milk you're misleading ponies." "One." "You're using the same term the griffons use for their product. You could use something like sub-zero temperature crafted semi-milk derivative." "Boom," "I AM CRAZY? YOU'RE THE ONE-" The window exploded and a purple blur landed right in front of Shining. The alicorn shook her head and raised her hoof. "You'll doom us all! Pfff... pathetic peasants, having no idea about science and industry and-" "Hi, sis," Shining Armor greeted his sister. "YAAAY, SHINY!" princess Twilight Sparkle, the alicorn of Magic, jumped up, completely forgetting what had just happened. "Nice to meet you too, Twily," he wrestled against his sister's bear hug. "I'm so glad you're okay. I thought you might have been mind-controlled again by Chrysalis so I've been building an army of robots and self-aware missiles set on eradicating their entire species but-" She noticed Six staring at her. "-I may have been wrong. Say, do you want to come to my new treehouse, I mean treebrary, treeboratory, I mean house? I've got swanky new chairs." "Yea sure," Shining grinned apologetically at Six, "We're done for today, aren't we?" "Yes." "Great!" Twilight jumped up and dusted herself off, "Note to self: Purify the ventilation system and turn off the insecticide valves." "What?" Six's ears splayed back. "I've got some green chineighese tea," said Twilight loudly. Six pondered the idea of asking Shadowstep to eradicate the entire village but hearing Shining happily chatter away with his younger sister dispersed the thought. The only thing that bothered it was the sickeningly sweet scent of love emanating from Twilight. It could understand the fresh and airy love coming from Shining but the heavy scent of rotten fruit answering from the princess made its head heavy. Despite all doubts, the three of them were soon sitting around a table inside a decorated hall seemingly bigger than the entire treehouse from the outside and sipping tea. Shining would have been happier if his head wasn't floating that much. "I think I'm gonna go for some fresh air, it's hard to breathe here," he said. "It's just, you know, dust from all those books. You can't go out, it's too cold in the evening. Let me just grab some air-fresheners from my room, the menthol will do you good." Twilight ran away, grinning. Six, having noticed nothing wrong, sniffed Shining's tea and scrunched its nose. "I might be new at this but is there supposed to be a love potion mixed in this?" "What?" Shining sniffed the tea as well, it didn't really do anything for him, "Damn you, Twilight... Well, my sister tends to love me a biiiiit too much from time to time and we haven't seen each other in quite a while so..." "Love potion, aphrodisiacs, some chemical concoction," continued Six. "It can't be that bad." "The tea is slowly turning BLUE!" "Or maybe it can. What now, then? I can't just run away." Six sat in thought for a second. "Yes, you can. I'll change into you and find out what's going on. Let's call it a thank you for helping me with the house." "Okay then but don't be too hard on my sister. She might be a bit forward but she's a good girl," Shining whispered and trotted away. As soon as the door slammed shut Twilight's head poked into the room. "Oh, your changeling friend left?" "She-she had to send a report to the queen," said Shining-Six. The head retreated back. "Drink up, Shiny. I can't find the scented candle- I mean air fresheners so you're gonna have to help me look for them." Six switched the teacups of Shining and Twilight and sniffed around both of them. Smiling, it -temporarily he- finished off his cup. "Come on, Twily. I feel better already and your tea is getting cold." The princess returned, blushing and breathing heavily, and quickly gulped down the rest of her drink. "It's so hot in here, good I have the ice cubes ready for later." "..." "For-for frozen salad. I keep the heating in my room waaaay too high but it's worth it in this weather. Now, come this way," Six couldn't help noticing how Twilight's hoof dug into his rump when she pushed him towards a metal door, "I got a better door for my privacy. You know how Spike gets from time to time with his tea and biscuit offers." "Mhm, yeah..." Six could feel the love turning into lust and setting fire to Twilight from within. Focusing on that penetrating scent, he couldn't react fast enough then Twilight shoved him down a rocky slide into the darkness. The fall wasn't long and he could still hear Twilight moaning Shining's name and running upstairs. The overwhelming scent coming from her ensured she won't be coming for quite a while, at least in one sense of the word. "Mrrrmmf!" came from the darkness. It was either a female voice or it belonged to a young male. Six lit up his horn and saw a purple body wriggling in the mass of black tendrils. From the top of the strange pile a green flame came out and a quick chomp eradicated the upper part of the... flowers? "Hey, Shiny, bro... it's me, Spike!" The creature was a small dragon being held by the black tentacles and his previous effort burned away the ones coming from his mouth. Unfortunately there was a lot more of them ending right at the base of his tail. Six was suddenly very sure why the little dragon was trying so hard not to move. "Oh, right," Spike mumbled sadly when he noticed Six wasn't moving, "You're one of the escaped clones." "What the? No, I'm just a changeling trying to help Shining find out what's going on." "And you fooled Twilight? Good job!" "Thanks-" "Nice knowing you though. When she finds out you're gonna be begging to end like me here." "Yea," Six gritted his teeth, "How is that?" "You know? Not that bad actually. If only she removed the thorns first." "Can't you, you know, just burn the rest like you did with the ones in your mouth?" "Two things... dragons BREATHE fire, not the other way around. I learned that the hard way after having a bit too much of the southern sauces, I can still feel the chilli seeds from time to time. The other thing is that I can chew through gems with my teeth so a chaos plant isn't that bad but my anus unfortunately isn't that magical." "Crap." "Take it like this, when she's done doing what she's doing," Spike's ear twitched, "aaaand that might take a while since Shining was here, she's going to give you all the love you can eat as long as you stay sane enough to keep your disguise." "I've got to get out!" An echoing growl came from one of the unlit passages leading from the laboratory room. "I wouldn't do that. My advice is - bite on the wooden bit and bark when she wants you to." "Whaaaaat?" "You'll know soon enough." The night fell on the Sweet Apple Acres like a tired drunk on a sewer grate. The three changelings, ready after half a day of observation and warming up, began their hunt. Shadowstep, having no interest in the hunt itself, took it upon herself to make sure nothing irreparable happened. Starlight might be able to deal with the golem if she met him due to her ability to understand and control absurdly complex magic but the commander herself didn't consider 'might be able' a good plan. What she was sure about was that the golem was out of reach for Cross. His combat mastery and short-term tactics would mean nothing against an enemy almost impervious to damage so she just snuck into the vicinity of the pony camp, leapt up on a high branch and stood guard. Cross followed a similar train of thought and entered the camp decided to either lure his prey out or take him down stealthily. Like every single day since coming here, Heavy was still up for the evening watch, sitting cross-legged with his back to the fire to keep his night vision intact. Changing the softness of his hooves, Cross kept sneaking up on him from behind. There were no problems for a changeling in watching the burning fire and being temporarily blinded so he picked up the pace. He got close enough to touch the earthpony without making noise and tapped his shoulder. Heavy turned around only to look straight into glowing, golden, catlike eyes. The feeling of impact hit him without actually taking any. Priding himself on his self-control, the earthpony didn't take long to break Cross' mental invasion but the changeling had already taken what he'd been looking for. Cross shapeshifted. His bulky build became taller, his purple mane turned black and grew longer, only the eyes remained the same. All he had to do now was to weaken his opponent, confuse his mind with either magic or venom and then his new form would have enough love to replenish the energy lost while fighting Shadowstep. Heavy's reaction surprised him though. The earthpony rose up calmly on his hind legs, kicked his staff up and caught it in his hooves. Cross could feel the deep sadness under the calm exterior though and realized his mistake. There would be no love to gain here. No amount of changeling magic could confuse a strong mind enough to believe the dead came back to them no matter how strong the wish might be. He could feel all that but even if he couldn't then the expression of utter agony and helplessness in Heavy's face would be enough of a hint. "Why?" asked the earthpony in a cracked voice, "Why him? Do you enjoy this?" Cross took a step back... and then another two. "YOU WORTHLESS PARASITE! WHY?!" yelled Heavy and the sudden roar was enough of a shock for him to pass the distance between him and Cross and attack. Summoning a metal staff from thin air to imitate his opponent, Cross managed to deflect Heavy's crushing attack. Just from that single blow he knew that the amusing hunt for love now changed into a fight for his life. Blackie, woken up by the clanking of metal on wood, rushed out of the tent only to see his temporary owner fight an unusual changeling in disguise. The illusions meant nothing to him and after a very short analysis he came to the conclusion that the chance of Heavy Hoof winning was microscopical. "GRAAAAWR!" his roar shook the nearby trees and with a thunderclap he jumped straight at the changeling. At that speed he would have slammed into the changeling without him having a chance to react and crushed even the love-reinforced armor without too much effort. The changeling should have ended like a red vapor in the air after being hit by the small meteor which was the Blackguard but unfortunately someone else stopped the charge. The tendrils of darkness swirled, seeping back into him and repairing the snapped tendons and crushed bones while he kept analysing the new threat. The amethyst sparks flowing freely through the carapace of the changeling who had stopped him proved she knew offensive magic would have been useless against him and had decided to improve the capabilities of her body. The analysis of his chances of victory... couldn't even finish as the changeling moved again and tackled him, flying both of them far away from Cross and Heavy. Starlight had located her target without any problems and stalked him into the bushes a fair distance away from the pony camp. She'd left earlier than the others because she wanted to enjoy the little game as much as possible. Flash Sentry was humming a cheerful tune as he opened his new edition of Princess Monthly with a centerfold of Twilight Sparkle, very generously improved by the magazine's graphic department, glowing with the power of all four alicorns. He spread the huge page, smiled and put a small lantern right next to it. "My my, aren't you a dirty... admirer." Flash Sentry's hoof stopped its way down and he looked at the intruder. "P-p-p-princess?" "For tonight, why don't you call me... goddess?" Starlight smiled like a predator whose prey came by itself and brought ketchup. "My purple goddess, I'll do anything for you." "Good, I have a void in me which only a good and obedient pet like you can fill." Flash was in heaven. Twilight had obviously remembered him, heard about him being here on a dangerous mission and came to reward him for his loyalty. The added bonus was that she wasn't freaking out about the poster of her spread out on the couch with glasses on. Unfortunately, in this dream come true, the part he'd come here to wish goodnight to didn't seem to be recieving the same messages as his brain. "Come oooooon," he wiggled his hips. Nope, not a twitch. "Don't you wish to please me with your whole being?" Twilight licked her lips. Yes, yes, yes, he did... well, his entire being did with the exception of one little part, the important one. "Errm, I usually don't have that problem around ladies." Starlight-Twilight prowled closer to the pegasus currently furiously punching his crotch and yelling. "Don't worry, my little dinner. I can be very... persuasive." With a weak shimmer of her horn Flash's nostrils were filled with the rich scent of earth and summer in full swing. Even here, in the snow, it made him blush. Unfortunately, that was the only movement his blood was going for right now. "Don't you quit on me, bro," Flash looked down desperately, "Breathe, soldier, breathe. I BEG YOU!" As handsome as Flash was, his helpless and frustrated screams were beginning to bore Starlight so she decided to to pull out the big guns. The glow of her horn changed from a singular entity to dozens of miniature dots forming a complex pattern around it. At the sight of Flash, now begging everyone from Celestia to Discord to help him get his junk up, she decided to up the power of the spell few notches. "JUST ONE NIGHT! I promise my soul to you, Ur'Gash, for just ONE NIGHT WITH TWILIGHT!" Perhaps few notches might not be enough. The glow of her horn became painful to look at and the pattern began to shift and twist the reality around it. The amount of held power eventually became too much for Starlight and she released it at its intended target. "OOOOH YEAH!" Flash roared, feeling like a new stallion, like a draft stallion, like dozens of draft stallions, like a legion set on repopulating the empty world. He looked down to see his new, amazing enhancement. What looked like a sack with two melons was pinning him to the ground no matter how hard he worked his legs to stand up. All that said, Flash junior was still on a union ordered strike. Starlight's legs were shaking, she was sweating like an earthpony after a rodeo and she was currently seeing double. Normally she wouldn't mind seeing the target set on playing Vlad the Impaler with her multiple times but the one detail she was hoping for still wasn't there. Melons - there, stallion - there, cucumber - still missing. "Oh for crying out loud!" she pushed Flash on his rump and with no semblance of subtlety began to examine the organ currently hiding under witness protection program sporting a new name of Jose Ramirez. "You useless bag of flesh!" Starlight threw her hooves up and cursed the sky, "The things I was going to do with you." "Sor-" "The smut that even Scream's cultists would be like - WHOA, SLOW DOWN!" "I-" "Illegal in both Equestria and the Griffon Empire!" "Go ooon?" "But no, you're not a stallion! You're a hoof-stool, your face is only good for my rump to rest on after having to do one of Cross' dumb practice races!" "Okay?" Flash's brain was slowly recieving the signals he'd been hoping for earlier. "Licking my hooves is the only use for you, you sissy! I'll strap you into a harness and whip you so hard you'll beg me to buck you with a cactus for a change!" "Hnnngh!" the pressure in Flash's nethers was beginning to build at the images presented by furious Twilight-Starlight. "I'll get a few minotaurs with jackhammers and a blowtorch to show your ass the middle ages-" "OOOOOH HERE IT COOOOMES!" Flash panted. "Eh... wha-" was the only thing Starlight was able to say before the spray hit her with the force of a shotgun blast and covered her completely from head to hooves in rapidly hardening substance. "Gnnnnngh..." Flash kept making the same sound over and over while his mind kept replaying him the pictures of Twilight in a leather harness and a riding crop resting her hooves on his back. Meanwhile, the 'wax' statue of an alicorn in front of him just kept muttering angrily under her breath. Blackie was having trouble healing his wounds. The protection of black magic coursing through his body was usually enough to keep him from actually sustaining any but against this enemy it was just enough to soften the blows and was mostly working on the deep cuts he kept recieving. He was tough but the changeling leader was fast, agile and deadly. However, she hadn't shown any desire to finish him off while he'd been regenerating. Maybe it was the fact that she was breathing heavily as well and limping, maybe it was something else. Her combat pattern was giving Blackie the idea that the latter might be the case. Careful and ready to pounce back up, he sat down and just stared at the amethyst queen. Shadowstep was dead tired. Between Cross few days ago and this abomination right now she was beginning to feel the lack of energy. She'd been on the defense most of the fight which was a good practice but the creeping exhaustion was slowly pushing her towards the inevitable necessity of destroying the black golem. Then he just sat down. If she didn't destroy him now he would eventually recover and overpower her but her main goal was just to keep him away from the pony camp temporarily. That, unfortunately, was out of her reach now. "I must be getting old," Shadowstep mumbled to herself. "Grawr?" "Or maybe you're just too good." "Grrrwrrrr..." "Don't look at me like that. I couldn't let you just stomp Cross into the ground." "Grrr?" "I think the earthpony sparked an interest in him, no idea why." "Grawrrr. Grrrr." "IS that so?" The Blackguard just glared at Shadowstep. "Okay, I don't really understand you." "Grrmrr," Blackie scowled. "Hmmm... I think it's time we head home. We have given them enough time to play." "Grrrrrrrrr!" "No rush. I doubt anyone is dead or seriously hurt." Shadowstep, while not as tall as Chrysalis, stood up and patted Blackie's head. "Grm?" "I'll be back for some more practice later. Stay in shape, my little nemesis." "Grrrr-mrmfhgf?" Blackie stood there, stunned, as the queen ruffled his mane and left into the darkness. "What the?!" Heavy watched the dark shape carry Blackie away from the camp but his instincts didn't allow him to get distracted. The filth daring to impersonate Sharp Biscuit was still there, mimicking his stance and twirling a steel staff. The decree by princess Celestia forbade violence against changelings but ordered those trying to fit in to do so without a cutie mark and this one had on his flank the mark of two bat wings wrapped around an eye, the symbol of Sharp's ability to wrap his head around any concept and see the underlying meaning in everything. It manifested itself in the now dead batpony's overall skill with weapons and strategy. He used to be a jack of all trades, an expert in everything, master in nothing but his extensive knowledge had allowed him to combine things together and pass any challenge... any but one. Few trades of blows between Heavy and Cross showed that the changeling was by no means 'only' an expert. Heavy, a hard-working genius of similar sort to Sharp bore a similar talent only aimed at arts, cooking and softer side of life. With the added benefit of his cutie mark of a staff broken in two being a symbol of his profficiency with that weapon and that there was no stopping him. Still, using the same weapon, the Canterlot staff master had to admit Cross was faster, his style was more refined and his changeling love-fueled stamina felt like cheating. Having no time to take a breath, Heavy tried to block an upswing of Cross' staff and failed when the weapon was knocked out of his hooves. The smug smile on Sharp's face was something the original batpony had never worn and it burned Heavy deeper than his loss in combat. Recklessly he punched Cross' weapon and caught his staff mid-fall just fast enough to get his ribs cracked by a wide, horizontal swing. Cross was in a focused state. His centuries of combat experience were winning against the earthpony but a small voice at the back of his head was whispering to him. He had no time to listen though as the hurt earthpony just shrugged and continued the assault. Few dodged blows, few blocked ones and some diverted harmlessly by his chitin and Cross managed to inflict another crushing blow on Heavy, this time to one of his front legs. The cracking noise was enough for the earthpony to groan but he twirled the staff around his body and held it ready, locked between his back and his working front leg. But that was basically it. Cross knew the stance, knew its strong and weak points and knew that an upswing now would be completely unblockable. Heavy's skull bore the blow and he dropped to the ground. Victorious, Cross couldn't help but cringe as Heavy's chipped front leg cracked when he pulled himself back up and spat out blood. The earthpony should have been unconscious by all means but his pained scream proved he did feel the wounds, he just fought them. "Stop," Cross winced when Heavy took another step forward, "You're going to hurt yourself." "You have no idea," Heavy growled, "This pain is nothing compared to..." "The bravado won't help." "Bucking... changeling... taking what's not yours- AAARGH!" Heavy's leg broke completely. "You should get that treated." "Change... into ANYPONY... ANYTHING ELSE... and I might... let... you... live." Cross' face contorted in horror as the voice in his head finally got the message through. He shivered and took a step back. "I-you-sorr-" "WORK, YOU PIECE OF SHIT!" Heavy yelled at the broken limb and then rammed his head into the ground, "useless, powerless... sack of garbage." Every word outside of the last one was followed by a blow of his head into the ground. The last one was softened by a grey hoof. Cross pulled the earthpony up and cradled him in his hooves. Seeing Heavy go past the breaking point sparked something in him and he felt as if he was held in a tightening vice. He didn't know what came over him but when Heavy looked up he leaned down and kissed him. He recognized the feeling of absolute devotion and love that flowed into him when the changeling venom took effect. Carrying the earthpony into one of the tents, Cross felt full of love aimed at somepony else. He wanted to throw up, he wanted to get rid of the full feeling but most of all he wanted to talk to somepony. He sniffed and wiped the tears from his face. "You're quite something, Cross," said the familiar voice of Shadowstep from the darkness. "I-I- he was so hurt..." "Yes. You did something horrible but in his pain you have found something very valuable many never will." "Commander?" "A strong sense of empathy." "...I want to go home..." "Let's go," she hoisted Cross on her back. Cross knew Starlight would never understand, he used to think noone could understand what he felt towards Shadowstep. Tonight he'd felt the emotion mirrored in the white earthpony and he trampled it for fun. Cross changed back into his usual disguise, resolved never to take the discarded form ever again. He felt sick of himself.