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// 3: I Wanna Lick Diamond Tiara's Hooves [Random Comedy] 
// Story: The Day of Endless Writing 
// by Bootsy Slickmane 
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	Apple Bloom winced as a sharp stick poked her in the back, but she didn't make a sound. If she did, then the two fillies she was watching from inside the shrub might notice her, and she couldn't have that. She took the stick in her mouth and tucked it behind another twig to get it out of the way before turning her eyes back to the two fillies nearby: Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon.

There she was, sitting on the grass not twenty feet away, her hooves wrapped around a plush Masked Matter-Horn doll with removable goggles and brushable mane. But who cared about the doll? Apple Bloom sure didn't. She cared about what was holding the doll. Diamond's pristine pink hooves gripped the plushie ever-so-tenderly, exerting just enough force to manipulate it without the risk of damage. They were trimmed to perfection, each one surely sustaining daily hooficures, and looked as though they'd never seen a minute of work in their little lives. Those hooves. Those beautiful, lickable hooves.

Apple Bloom had to wipe her mouth to remove the drool that was accumulating on her lips. She settled back into a sitting position, and felt the stupid stick poke her in the back again. She shuffled around, pushing the stick away again, when her ears perked up.

"Hey, what's that?"

Apple Bloom froze, her mouth wrapped around the stick. She slowly turned her head, and was just barely able to see Silver Spoon walking in her direction through the leaves. She held her breath as the gray filly stopped in front of the shrub and reached downward. She stifled a squeak as she felt something tugging on her tail.

"Silver, what're you doing over there?" said Diamond Tiara.

Her tail fell limp again, and she could see Silver Spoon looking at the bush again.

"There's some weird, red thing in this bush."

Apple Bloom hastily pulled her tail into the shrub as Silver turned back around.

"Who cares?" Diamond Tiara said. "C'mon, I'm getting bored already."

Silver stared into the bush for a few more seconds before turning back around and walking over to Diamond. Apple Bloom let out her held breath as Silver sat back down and picked up one of the Power Ponies dolls again. That had been way too close. She settled back into place to watch Diamond's hoof tenderly caress the plush doll.

As she watched the ponies playing and repeatedly wiped the ever-flowing saliva from her mouth, she grew irritable and frustrated. She'd been doing this same thing for who knows how many weeks. She was tired of just imagining licking Diamond's hooves.

She wanted to do it for real.

Apple Bloom steadied herself, taking in a long, slow breath. Then she crept out of the shrub, leaving from the side opposite the two fillies, and snuck off behind a tree. After about another minute of waiting, she made her way around the tree and walked across the grass. "Ahh, what a nice day for a walk in the park," she remarked to nopony in particular as she approached the playing fillies.

Diamond and Silver both turned, but only huffed and ignored Apple Bloom. She didn't let it bother her, though, and walked right up to them. "Hey, Diamond Tiara," she chirped.

"I'm busy," was Diamond's reply.

"So, I been thinkin'," AB said, paying Diamond no mind, "you and I never really got along, but isn't it better to have friends than enemies? With that in mind, I'd like to offer you my forgiveness and friendship."

Diamond slowly turned her narrowed eyes to Apple Bloom. "What?"

"Oh, what the hay, I'll even give you a little gift as a peace offering. Here, come with me and I'll give you a hooficure."

"What?" Diamond repeated, raising one eyebrow.

"In fact, as your new best friend, I can polish your hooves everyday. How does that sound?"

"Go away," Diamond said bluntly, turning back to Silver.

"Are ya sure you don't want me to polish your hooves?"

"Leave me alone, you little weirdo."

Apple Bloom glanced around the park, racking her tiny brain for ideas. She quickly kicked the ground, knocking a clod of dust and dirt up and onto Diamond, who shrieked in response. "Oh, look at that!" Apple Bloom said in mock surprise. "Now you've gotten your hooves all dirty. Here, lemme clean 'em for you."

Diamond held out one of her now-dusty hooves, pushing against the yellow filly's chest. "Back. Off."

Apple Bloom's mouth hung open, and her eyes slowly rotated to look down at her chest. Yep, one of Diamond's hooves was really touching her. It was so close, she could almost taste the fudgy sweetness that she assumed was contained within the exquisite hooves. Suddenly it was all to much, and she could withstand it no longer. She leaned down and pressed her tongue to the pink hoof as it held her back, her eyes rolling over in her head as she took in the taste of dust, dried leaves, and other assorted things that Diamond had recently stepped in.

Diamond Tiara pulled her hoof back, recoiling in horror. "Eww! What're you doing?! Gross!"

"Huh," Apple Bloom muttered. "I kinda figured this point in my life would feel more profound or somethin'." Her train of thought was derailed as something metallic pinged off her forehead "Huh?"

Silver Spoon was standing between her and Diamond, a cluster of spoons held in her mouth. "Flee now, or catch my spoony wrath," she growled out from around the spoons.

"What the—" but Apple Bloom was struck right in the lips with a spoon. She turned tail, running away from the enraged silver filly as the unrelenting assault of spoons continued, pelting her even as she fled.

"That's right, run!" Silver shouted. "Nopony gets to like Diamond's hooves but me! You got that?"