//------------------------------// // Chapter IV: Next Stop, Ponyville // Story: Life Is A Game We All Must Play // by Bambi-Fuego //------------------------------// Chapter IV: Next Stop, Ponyville I never expected to get far in life, never planned to do anything interesting and I can guarantee I never would have expected to find myself in a small town full of talking ponies. So let me tell you how I got here. "The chariot leaves in fifteen minutes Richard." Luna said, she looked tired, she's usually asleep by now. "Why are you here exactly? You're obviously tired and I'm back here in two weeks anyways." "Three actually, there was a small change of plan so your flying lessons will have to be pushed back a week and what's wrong with me saying goodbye to a friend?" "Nothing. It's just that you probably need a few more and I'm hardly going to be late. I've got fuck all to pack and all the clothes I own don't fit and the rest of my stuff I can't use because I'm fingerless. I'm only taking it because you never know." If I can be changed back to a human if the need arises I will do exactly that. "Never know what?" Luna can be a little dense sometimes. "I'll never know when, not if, when I may need them." "I see. Anyways I will leave you to what little pack you need to do and meet you at the chariot since I know you know where to go." I didn't. "Actually could you help me pack. I don't know how to use these yet." I said lifting up a hoof, that's going to be annoying to used to writing, saying for that matter. I nearly fell over when I went from four hooves to three. Keyword there was nearly. I'm getting better at this. Luna muttered something the helped me pack. "So I'll see you in three weeks." I said getting into a chariot which is getting pulled by another pony, a Pegasus if you're wondering. Why do they have these? Also only Luna is allowed to be reading this! So if I find anyone else reading my journals there will be hell to pay doesnt matter who you are I will hunt you down, this shit is private. ... After a forty-five minute long, uncomfortable ride later I arrived in Ponyville. I've never seen anything like it, it was small but vibrant. It felt like a happy place if that makes sense and in all honesty I did not like that, at all. "Just another day in a world full of talking horses." I said to myself. I got off the chariot which left almost immediately after I got out off it. "Bye then." I saw a familiar purple unicorn heading towards me. "So you must be Bambi?" She said when she was a few feet in front of me. "The one and only." There is a high chance that Im the one person on this world with that name. "The Princess told me that I'm to give you a tour of Ponyville and then take you to meet the five other ponies you met in the Everfree about four weeks ago." "Any chance we can skip the meet and greet part of that?" "No we cannot." Worth a shot. "So where to first?" "First I'm going to show you were Sugarcube corner is." I'm guessing she saw my 'The Fuck?' face "It's a bakery and the market is around the corner from Sugarcube Corner." "So why not just show me where the market is?" That would make more sense. "Because that is were Pinkie Pie works." The name rings a bell. "And who's that?" "Shes the pink one you met in the Everfree." I felt a shiver crawl up my spine when she said the Everfree. The place seriously creeps me out. "Now follow me please." We headed off in a directing leading toward the centre of town. "So.. how has your time in Equestria been?" Twilight said trying to start a conversation. "Terrible." "Huh?" She looked more than surprised. "Twilight was it?" She nodded. "In the last month I've had more shit happen to me than what you will have in your lifetime." This world, more specifically Equestria, is quite peaceful, little or no crime rate, low level of unemployment despite the fact almost everyone living here is racist it's, from what I've heard, it's a really nice place to live. "I've been thrown into a world where I clearly don't belong. I've nearly been killed in an assassination attempt on Luna's life, the only reason we're both still breathing is because I never left my pistol out of reach and I was quick to react also I killed three people, three people and I hadn't been in here for a month! That's not me! I've never killed anyone before nor have I ever wanted to, I don't even fell bad about what I did. What does that make me, a psychopath?" Does it? "No, why would you even think that?" "Can you give me another reason why I acted like that?" After a while she just shook her head. "And when I first met you ponies I wasn't given the best impression now was I?" "...Applejack wants to apologise about that." She crippled my legs and then I was knocked unconscious!" I shouted drawing the attention of a few people near by. "She had no intention of you getting knocked unconscious and like I said she wants to apologise." I'm going to tell/show her something about apologising that my dad told me. And that, arguably, isn't the worst thing to happen. Five days ago the nightmares started, probably. I don't remember what happens but it doesn't take a genius to work out what happened when you wake up sweating heavily, panting and still a little tired. "Enough of that. We're here now." Twilight said as we reached our destination. My reaction to Sugarcube Corner was unexpected. I laughed, quite hard actually. Which was followed by a "You know what fuck this. I'm going back to Canterlot at least there things make more sense." I could see a train from where I was so I walked in that direction. I couldn't afford a ticket so I would walk back to the city following the track. That was me genuine plan but I was surrounded in a purple aura and I lost everything. I couldn't move, no matter how hard I tried I couldn't move anything, I hated feeling like that and I never want to feel like that again. I was picked up off the ground by something invisible and rotated around so I was facing Twilight. I was put down on the ground and when I was released from my invisible bonds I screamed "DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE DO THAT TO ME AGAIN, EVER!" I screamed at her because I seen her horn glow with the same colour that surrounded me. I knew unicorns could use magic but I never seen, until that moment, it being used and now I'm shit scared of it. "I'm... I'm so sorry. I promise I'll never use it on you again. Not without a very, very good reason. I promise." I think she was more scared than sorry. Celestia did give me a heads up on that my mind-set would be different to her people, well she said ponies but you get the picture. Racist bitch. I knew that was true because no one was expecting me to snap like that. I looked around, I definitely caused a scene, people were looking at us, me in particular in shock and a bit of fear from the younger ones. I re-read my journal so a note to self to find out what they're called. "Good. I'm sorry I snapped at you like I did but I don't think I've ever been so scared in all my life, and it only happened in the short space of a few seconds." Most of the crowd that I caught the attention dispersed but there was a few left. "So shall we?" I said indicating the door of the bakery. The bakery looks like a fucking ginger bread house, that is why I laughed. "I think it's best If we skip Pinkie for now. For multiple reasons that have only recently been brought to my attention, like you being afraid of magic. Just trust me it's best not to go there just yet" If I remember correctly pinkie didn't have a horn. If that's true why wouldn't I want to go there? "Well since I have no clue in where to go, lead the way." "Well since Pinkie Pie is out the equation, I would suppose Rarity is as well, Rainbow Dash is in Cloudsdale right now." I'm not even going to ask. "Fluttershy is always accepting visits from friends and Applejack is either in the market or working down in the orchards. So it's Fluttershy or Applejack, which one do you want to see first?" "Wait I got to see all of them?" She nodded Wonderful! I thought sarcastically. "Umm... I'll pick... Fluttershy." "You would pick the one the one who's further away wouldn't you." Twilight muttered. "So next stop Fluttershy." I said walking away. I turned around "Which way is Fluttershy's?" "This way." she said walking in the opposite direction I did. I'm not going to describe the journey to Fluttershy's, nothing notable happened so I'm not going to write it down. When we arrived at Fluttershy's home, which is a very woodland like cottage" "Looks cosy but small. Still cosy though." Let the first visit commence. Not like I came here to make friends. Twilight walked up to the door, knocked. "Fluttershy. Are you in?" No answer. "Fluttershy, it's me Twilight." Still no answer. "She's probably around the back." Well this is going well. We walked around the back of the cottage. All we need now is a flood and a boat. We saw Fluttershy in a very large garden surrounded with every different kind of animal I can name and a few I can't. "Oh... hello Twilight." Fluttershy said with a familiar shy voice. Well that explains the name. "umm... who's your friend?" "That's the stallion I told you about yesterday. Bambi... Fuego was it?" Twilight said. "Yeah, that's me. Hello." I said to Fluttershy. "Umm... If you don't mind me asking... What brings you hear?" I took a look around and I saw. Well what I saw didn't make sense in the terms of nature. I saw bats along with owls playing, yes playing, with mice. And the owls were awake during the day. I caught a glimpse of a bear with some squirrels. And I thought this would be normal. Well as normal as it can get here. "Good question. Why am I here Twilight?" I asked. "I brought you here to make friends. Friendship is one of the most important things in life." Sure it is. I didn't come here to make friends, I came here to get out of Canterlot. Fucking horse puns! "Hold on. I was never told about no friend making just that I would meet the people I met back in that... god forsaken forest, actually just what the fuck is up with that place?" "Nopony knows. It's a huge mystery and nopony will probably know for a very long time." "Lovely." I said sarcastically. "Also I was told to meet you lot and one of you wanted to apologise and if I'm not mistaken we're visiting her next. Unfortunately." I muttered the last part. Fluttershy said something but I didn't hear what. "You're going to have to speak up, I can't hear you." She is annoyingly quiet. "I said, do you want to stay for lunch... if that's okay with you that is." "Yeah, why not. Twilight, you staying?" Not like she had much choice, she's my guide. "I'll stay." "Yay!" she didn't say it loud but it was a loud whisper. Lunch was nice, all things said. We had a tulip salad and I've grown to like tulips, new taste buds probably did that. Despite a lot of things, me and Fluttershy do have a few things in common. Only a few. "So..." I said as we walked away from Fluttershy's little cottage. "Who's next?" I already knew who and I don't know why I asked. "Applejack." Can't wait. "I'm sure I told you not too long ago." "You did. So let's go." So off we were to... "Where are we going exactly?" "Applejack lives at Sweet Apple Acres." What she said. "Twilight?" I said as we arrived back in Ponyville, I should mention Fluttershy lives outside of town. "Yes Bambi?" Why did I pick that off all names? Because you respond to it. "You know how I wasn't... well a pony" I said the last part quietly so only she could here. She nodded "Well during the... change, Celestia basically fucked up a bit on a few things." "Princess Celestia doesn't make mistakes." "Well she did. Have you ever changed a species of someone?" "No." She answered it like it was a stupid question. Well it was when you think about it. "I didn't think so. She didn't get something's right but nothing major." Depends how you think about it. My predatory state will make me stand out, which is something I do not want at all. "So anyways what's the difference between the wings of an Alicorn and those of a Pegasus?" "Not much. Why ask?" "She gave the wrong ones." I thought that it would be a little obvious why but that's just me. "Well they do look a little bigger than usual." She said eyeing up my wings. "There isn't much difference between the two. I think the only noticeably differences are the size of the wings and alicorn wing tips will tint to the main colour of their mane. That's a theory because it's only happened once in known history." She then trailed off into the history of the Alicorns and how rare they are. Fortunately for me she was stopped when we arrived at our location. Unfortunately she then moved on to how friendship is all good and that her taking me to visit her friends would be a great start for me to make my own. Which I told her, again, that wasn't there to make friends. "So where is Applejack?" By then I had already given up on the names. "By now she's usually in the apple orchards." "How big are the orchards?" I was hoping they weren't. "Quite big. See for yourself." The smart arse, purple unicorn said as a very large apple orchard came into view. "...Shit. We now have to hunt her down don't we?" One very long hour later we found her. "Fucking finally!" "Oh hi Twilight... and friend." That southern accent is getting annoying very quickly. "Hi AJ, this is Bambi. The stallion I was walking to you about yesterday." You talked about me a lot yesterday. "I'm mighty sure he didn't look like that back in the Everfree." That's because I didn't. "Let's just say he's changed... a lot." "What do you mean, 'changed'?". Apple jack asked. Let me describe her a little more. She is orange with, I shit you not, and blonde mane and tail in... a pony tail, was quite hard to keep the laughter down, green eyes and her arse tattoo (cutie mark) is three red apples. "It means that my body has changed completely and now I'm a Pegasus who's, currently, grounded until I learn to fly." I decided to make myself heard, couldn't stop smirking about the whole 'pony's tail is in a pony tail' thing. "Oh, now that does make a bit more sense. And umm... about well... you know." If she wants me to say it, I will. "If you mean you hitting me in the back of the legs, me falling to the ground and being knocked unconscious for a while, then yes, I do." "I'm mighty sorry about that, but you were scaring Fluttershy, I only did it to help her." Well that makes it all okay. "And what did I do to scare her, maybe me being there, I can't help that. And what gave you an indication that I was intentionally scaring her? Because I wasn't." "I said I'm sorry." Sorry doesn't fix everything. "Have you got a plate on you?" "...What?" Both Applejack and Twilight said. "Simple question. Do you. Have. A plate. On you?" "Well no, why would I have a plate?" Applejack asked. "Because I want to show you something, because sorry doesn't fix anything." "It makes things better." Applejack protested. No it doesn't. "Sure it does." "It does." I could see her becoming irritated. "Calm down! that's better. If you two are just going to argue, and you've only just met, we might as well leave." "Fine by me. By Applejack, wasn't so much of a pleasure to meet you." That was probably a bit too much looking back. "Sorry about this Applejack but I... I got to go." I heard Twilight say. "I understand Twilight, it's not your fault. See around Twi." "Bye Applejack." Twilight caught up with me. "You didn't need to do that Bambi. Yes she made a mistake but all you had to do was accept her apology and everything would be okay. But you didn't, so now we're in this situation." "Hey this is all on me so if you want to go back, be my guest. All I need is to find myself a place to stay and find a way to get me some money and I'm good. So like I said if you want to go back, just do it." "You're confusing. One minute you're doing what you've just done to Applejack, the next you're completely calm. But we can talk about this later, because it's going to be dark soon." "...So?" "Well since you don't have a place to stay, and that it was Princess Celestia's idea, the library has a spare room so you can stay there." Twilights offer wasn't something I was in the position to turn down. "Why the library?" I asked. "I live in it. And a heads up before we get there, the library, it's a tree." Because that's normal. "Okay... To the tree." "To the tree..." It was dark by the time we made it to Twilight's... tree, library, home I still don't know what to call it. "Home sweet home." Twilight said when we got to the door. She opened the door where she was greeted by a, "Hello Twilight, you're back later than usual and oh... It's him..." The voice said, I'm guessing the end part was about me. When I saw who the voice came from, I just gave up on anything being remotely normal on this planet anymore. Because said voice came from, a very small dragon, who just happened to be purple and not at all scary. "For fucks sake can't anything be normal?" I asked myself. "Nope..."