//------------------------------//
// Just Mommy and Me 
// Story: Friendship is Epic - Book 1: My Big Flare (COMPLETE REMAKE) 
// by FlareGun45 
//------------------------------//

Today was a beautiful day in Ponyville, a beautiful day to stay indoors and play video games! That’s what Engie and I have been doing that morning. “Hey, Engie? You know how they always call these towns FORT Lauderdale and FORT Drum and FORT Peirce?” I asked him.

“Why?” Engie asked.

“They all have the word FORT in them but they got no forts. Also, how about Salt Lake City? They call it Salt Lake City, but there are no salty lakes. Why call a town something it’s not?” I asked.

“You see, Flare, you wonder why nopony was friends with ya back in Mareami.” Engie said.

“I do wonder why, and I still do.” I said. Just then, my door bell rings, and I paused the game.

“Oh so you’re gonna chicken out of the fight then?” Engie asked.

“Engie, I’m not Scootaloo.” I corrected him as I walked over to the door and activated my security eyeball camera outside. It was Blaze.

“Si?” I said in an hispanic woman’s voice.

“Hey Flare, can you let me in?” Blaze asked.

“No, no, Miser Flare no home.” I said in the same voice.

“Oh… well, can you at least give him a message for me?” Blaze asked.

“Nooooooo, nooooooo.” I said as I deactivated my eyeball camera.

“Oh c’mon, man! Quit fooling around and let me in!” Blaze complained.

I opened the door and said, “Holy Wizard of Hope, Blaze! You’re such a drama queen!” 

“Drama king.” Blaze corrected me.

“Really? You’re not a mare?” I asked.

“No!” Blaze said.

“Then how do you explain that girly hairdo?” I asked.

“Wha-WHAT?! This happens to be the same type of hairdo my grandfather had, and he was an Equestrian hero!” Blaze corrected me.

“Soooooo, he was a girl?” I asked.

“It-it’s just… shut up, man!” Blaze said angrily.

“Sweet Celestia, Bla-“ Engie said but I interrupted him.

“Sweet Luna.” I corrected him.

“Sweet Luna, Blaze! Why are you bein’ so- wait, what? Why can’t ah say Celestia?” Engie asked.

“Luna needs more attention.” I said.

“Whatever. Why are you bein’ so mad about this?” Engie asked.

“I just don’t like my family being teased like this, Engie. I’ve seen it way too much.” Blaze said.

“Sorry, brah.” I said.

“It’s ok, man.” Blaze said. “Hey, did you know it’s Mother’s Day tomorrow?”

“Oh right! Mommy’s day! My mommy said she was gonna come down to Ponyville later today.” I said.

“Ya still call her mommy?” Engie asked.

“She’s my mommy? Why not call her mommy?” I asked.

“Only babies call their mama’s mommys.” Engie said.

“Oh yeah? What do you call your mommy?” I asked.

“Mama.” Engie said.

“How is that any different?” I asked.

“All the hoodlums call their mama’s mama.” Engie said.

“Is she gonna come down?” I asked.

“She’s already at mah house actually.” Engie said.

“Oh awesome! Can’t wait to meet her! Blaze, is your mom coming down?” I asked.

“Huh?” Blaze asked.

“Your mommy! Is she coming to Ponyville too?” I asked.

“Oh, ummm… she can’t. She’s…. sick.” Blaze said.

“Sick?” I asked.

“Yeah, sick.” Blaze said.

“What type of sickness?” Engie asked.

“The type of sickness that she can’t travel in, and be in public areas.” Blaze said.

“Which iiiiiis…” Engie started. 

Blaze was silent for a few seconds, but then he finally let out an answer; “She has diarrhea.” 

“Eww! Don’t say that word! Say ‘she has to go number 3’.” Engie suggested.

“Number 3?” Blaze asked.

“Number 1 is pee, number 2 is poop, number 3 is... that word, and number 4 is throw up.” Enige explained.

“Oh I hate that word! I prefer a more polite and less disgusting term for it: vomit.” I suggested.

“Ok, this is starting to gross me out.” Blaze said.

“Yeah me too.” I said.

“Hey, you started it, Blaze.” Engie reminded him.

Blaze sighed. “Whatever. So when is your mom gonna be here, Flare?”

“She’s gonna be here at noon. She wanted to take the early train from Mareami to here. Mareami’s not a close place. I dunno why she didn’t bother flying.” I said. Just then, a pony in a suit comes over and whispers in Engie’s ear.

“Mah lawyer is advisin’ me not to use an airplane joke to avoid offendin’.” Engie said.

“But brah, noon is just in two minutes.” Blaze informed me.

“That clock is an hour behind.” I corrected him while pointing to my clock hanging on the wall.

“I wasn’t looking at the clock; I was looking on my phone.” Blaze corrected me.

“Oh my Luna! Then there’s no time to waste!” I panicked as I ran out of my trailer and went over to the trainstation as fast as I could. My friends from the Noble Six all joined me over there so we can meet with her.

Crystal took a sniff and exhaled, and then she said, “Ah! Don’t you love that trainstation air?”

“No. I once had to wear a breathing mask for three weeks straight after inhaling too much of the train steam when I had to stay inside an engine with the conductor, makin’ sure no fires would start spreading from the furnace.” Aqua said.

“Why would fire spread from a train furnace?” Engie asked.

“Ironically, the whole train was made of wood.” Aqua said.

“Why would a train be made out of wood?” Engie asked.

“The conductor asked for a metal train that can carry large shipments of wood, but the construction workers ended up making a wooden train that can carry large shipments of heavy metal.” Aqua said.

“Trust me, I’ve seen ponies get misunderstood over even the simplest stuff, like that one time I visited a stock market.” Psyche said.

A cutaway shows a bunch of ponies in a stock market having a meeting, one of the stockers said while typing numbers in a calucator: “I've got a stock here that could really excel.”

“It could excel?” one of the stockers asked.

“Excel?” another stocker asked.

“Sell?” another stocker asked.

“Sell!” another stocker yelled.

“SELL! SELL! SELL! SELL! SELL! SELL!” all the stockers yelled.

“Ok this is madness. I should really get going.” One of the stockers asked annoyingly.

“Good-bye.” One of the stockers said.

“Good-bye?” another stocker asked.

“Bye?” another stocker asked.

“Buy?” another stocker asked.

“BUY! BUY! BUY! BUY! BUY! BUY! BUY! BUY!” all the stockers yelled. The cutaway ends.

“Anyways, Flare, how about telling us a bit about your mom?” Crystal suggested.

“Well, her name is Bow Gun, she wears a green vest, she knows great magics like me, like she has the ultimate arrow rain attack, something similar to my Shoop Da Whoop.” I said.

“Wow, I guess these epic magics run in the family, huh?” Crystal asked.

“My mom was the one that actually forced me into learning these new magics so I can defend myself against the bullies in my school.” I said.

“Did she teach you to use Shoop Da Whoop?” Crystal asked.

“No, I actually learned that spell by accident. She actually got me into reading a spell book, but my mom never taught me them personally, but she did teach me to control them.” I explained.

“Is your mom strict?” Aqua asked.

“She has attitude problems at times, but she’s always there for me when I need her, and there isn’t a single pony that can replace her!” I said.

“Hey, Flare!” Fluttershy yelled from the distance as she waved at me.

“Hey, Flutters!” I yelled and waved back.

“Eeyup! Ain’t nopony gonna replace her.” I said.

“It must be nice having a mom that really cares about ya that’s still around.” Aqua said.

“This day must be tough for you, huh Aqua?” I asked.

“Meh, my sister and I were young so it doesn’t really affect us as much as it should.” Aqua said.

“Y-yeah…” Psyche said.

“Are you alright, Psyche?” I asked.

“I-I’m fine.” He stuttered.

“Don’t worry, Psyche. I’m the exact same way. I know how you feel.” Crystal said.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Psyche said.

“Look, here comes the Mareami train now.” Aqua pointed out. The train from Mareami pulls into the station, and the conductor was the first to come out, following are the other passengers that were on it, but I couldn’t find my mom anywhere. 

“Any of you see her anywhere?” I asked.

“We don’t even know what she looks like.” Engie corrected me.

“She’s regular brown with dark brown hair, green eyes, green vest, shoes on her hind hooves like me, she’s a unicorn, her mane style is similar to Twilight’s, and she has a dog for a flank tattoo.” I explained.

“Why does she have a dog cutie mark?” Blaze asked.

“I think it’s best if I don’t say.” I said.

“Pokie faaaaaaaaaaace!” my mom yelled at excitement as she ran up to me and gave me a hug.

“Wait, what did she said?” Crystal asked.

“Hey…. Mommy.” I said.

“You still call her mommy?” Crystal asked.

“It’s nice to see you, mom.” I said as she wouldn’t stop hugging me.

“I haven’t seen you in FOREVER! Why did you leave Flare? Why did you leave me with daddy?” she asked.

“Is he still working a lot?” I asked.

She groans. “You don’t know the half of it!”

“I believe I do.” I said.

“So Flare, you’ve been brushing your teeth, right?” she asked.

“Yes.” I said.

“Floss too?” she asked.

“Yes.” I said.

“Paid your bills?”

“Yes.”

“Get at least 8 hours sleep?”

“Yes.”

“Feed the fish every day?”

“Yes.”

“How are the fish anyway? How’s my little Darrel doing?” she asked.

“He’s fine, mom.” I said as I released my mom’s grasp.

My mom looks over at my friends. “Oh, are these your new friends were talking to me about?”

“Yes they are! This is Crystal Iceblast, Aquatic Armor, Red Engineer, Psyche Illution, and Blaze Goldheart!” I introduced them to her.

“Lovely to meet you, Mrs. Gun!” Aqua said.

“Lovely to meet you too, Red Engineer!” she said to him.

“Um, I’m Aqua.” He corrected her.

“Oh, sorry.” She chuckles. “I’m not good with names that well.”

“Neither is your son.” Aqua said. “He once called me Shirley.”

“No I didn’t.” I corrected him.

“You actually did.” Crystal corrected me. “You said: ‘Shirley you know that black beans is the best type of beans’”.

“Mom, that was an awfully long train ride for you, huh?” I asked.

“Please don’t tell me you’re already thinking of lunch.” My mom asked as she facehoofed herself.

“She knows me all too well.” I said to my friends.

“Don’t we all?” Psyche asked. 

“Oh hey look, here comes the wooden train carrying all that heavy metal I was tellin’ ya about.” Aqua pointed to a wooden train arriving at the station. One of the train cars opens revealing Linkin Park singing Crawling. 

So I took my mom over to my shop to have her try my pizza. I took her and my friends to sit down at the nicest booth in the restaurant. “Wow, Flarey! I really like how this place looks. This is the famous pizza shop I keep hearing about?” my mom asked.

“I hope so! It was told that this is the best pizza shop in all of Equestria.” I said.

“Well, I’ll be the judge of that. Can I please have an iced tea with lemon?” my mom asked.

“Of course, mom! Whatever you want!” I said.

“It’s freshly brewed right?” my mom asked.

“Why wouldn’t it? That fountain-type iced tea is disgusting!” I said.

“And the bottle too!” my mom added.

“LAWL I know right?” I asked.

“LAWL I agree.” My mom said.

“LAWL!” I said.

“LAWL!” my mom said.

“Does that run in the family?” Engie asked.

“Anyways, mom, feel free of getting to know my friends. I’ll get your drinks and your garlic rolls.” I said as I walked over to the kitchen to get the stuff.

“Hey, Crystal?” my mom asked.

“Yeah?” Crystal asked.

“Oh, sorry, I was actually talking to the one with the Wonderbolts outfit.” My mom corrected herself.

“I’m Blaze.” he said.

“Alright, Blaze. Are you the same Blaze my son always talks to on Skype non-stop?” she asked.

“I’m not sure.” Blaze said.

“Well, Flare didn’t have much friends in Mareami, but he did have his online friends. Got a little tired of him talking about this Blaze I keep hearing about non-stop. Makes me think that’s his coltfriend or something.” Mom said.

Blaze was silent for a moment and made an awkward face. “You don’t say?”

“I do say! Well, Flare’s life looks like it’s improved big time! My son is friends with a Wonderbolt!” mom said excitedly.

“I know, it is pretty exciting, isn’t it?” Blaze asked.

“Right. Hey Blaze, did anypony ever tell you that you look like a girl with that mane style?” mom asked.

“Yes, actually, your son mentioned it earlier today.” Blaze said with an annoyed tone.

“Oh yeah, my Flarey is one of stating the obvious.” My mom chuckled and said.

“Hey ol Psyche is also one of stating the obvious.” Crystal pointed out.

“Isn’t that right, Psyche?” mom asked.

“I would suppose so, Mrs. Gun.” Psyche said.

“Oh please, my friends call me Bow.” mom said.

“Alright… Bow.” Psyche said.

“YOU can call me Mrs. Gun.” She suggested.

“Oh… alright.” Psyche said.

“I’m kidding, I don’t have any friends.” Mom said.

“Is that why Flare didn’t have any back in Mareami?” Engie asked.

“Oh no, some of us never seemed to bother.” Mom said. “Flare on the other hoof, he tries too hard. One of the main reasons he didn’t have any friends back in Mareami was he tried too hard. He just seemed so lonesome all the time, and he begs, and such. The only time Flare made friends was when the ponies were using him. Tragic time it was for him.” Mom explained.

“So we heard.” Aqua said.

“The only ones Flarey ever hung with out of regular bases is his sister, his fish, and every night he goes to the beach and talks to the moon. I swear, I should’ve put him in therapy.” Mom said.

“But, Mrs. Gun, if Flare hasn’t talked to the moon every night, he wouldn’t even be here right now.” Aqua said.

“Right, I heard of that story of Princess Luna and the moon, and how she was able to bring the will of friendship inside Flare and have him feel welcomed in Ponyville.” Mom said.

“It sounded like a very cute story if you ask me.” Crystal said.

“Oh yes, very cute.” Mom said.

“Alright, here are your drinks and garlic rolls.” I said as I placed them on the table in front of my mom and friends.

“I gotta say, Flarey. I admire the cooking skills grandma taught you.” Mom said.

“I wouldn’ve gone this far without grandma, or nana for that matter. B-T-W, how is your mom doing anyway?” I asked.

“She’s fine. I asked her if she wanted to come but she said no.” mom said.

“Yeah, nana can be as stubborn as a mule sometimes.” I said. “No offense.”

“None taken.” Mulia Mild said.

“Hey, where’s that other mule?” I asked.

“Oh he had a business trip to go to so I’m taking over as the stereotypical mule.” Mulia said.

“Oh, alright.” I said.

“He’s auditioning for Littlest Pet Shop.” Mulia said.

“Got it.” I nodded.

“I told him he was too big to be a little pet though.” Mulia added.

“Alright I got it, Mulia, thank you.” I said.

“But he said he was the same size as ‘my little ponies’ so we decided to go anyway thinking he’ll get the part.” She added. I was so annoyed by her constant chatter; I looked over at my friends with a ‘can you believe this?’ look on my face. “I mean, he thinks the little ponies and the littlest pets are the same exact thing, but littlest means smaller than little, isn’t it?”

“If I get Lyra to make you a free dessert, will you stop blabbering?” I asked.

“Yes, please.” Mulia said as she turns around and walks off, and as she was, she chuckled to herself and said, “Works every time!”

“Hey, Flare!” Fluttershy said as she walked into my shop along with Rarity.

“Hey, Flutters, Rarity! It’s good that you two are here. I would like you both to meet my mommy: Bow Gun.” I said.

"You still call her mommy?" Rarity asked.

“Oh so you’re two of the Elements of Harmony, right?” mom asked.

“We sure are! I’m generosity, and Fluttershy here is kindness.” Rarity said.

“Nice accent.” Mom said.

“Oh thank you, Mrs. Gun. I really find it devine myself!” Rarity said.

“I was talking about the yellow one.” Mom said.

“Oh, me?” Flutters asked.

“Yes, I love your voice! It’s very gentle, and innocent.” Mom said.

Fluttershy blushed; “Well… thank you!”

“Hey if it makes ya feel any better Rarity, I like your voice.” Aqua said.

“Aqua you’re such a dearie!” Rarity said.

“So what can I do for the two of you?” I asked.

“You had an advertisement on Vanilla Crème Brûlée. I would ever so appreciate it, Flare, if I bought some from you.” Rarity asked.

“Of course, Rarity! Go talk to Bonnie over at the counter; she’ll help you out!” I offered.

“Thank you, dear! My mother is going to adore it!” Rarity said.

“Hey Rartiy, can I ask you something? Is your dad a unicorn?” I asked.

“Of course he is! Why?” Rarity asked.

“Well, he wears that straw hat all the time, you can’t really tell.” I said.

“My parents love to vacation a lot.” Rarity said.

“So does my mom.” I said.

“Hey, B-T-W Flare, are you going with me and daddy on our next cruise on the Allure of the Seas?” mom asked. “I can’t stop watching videos on ponies going aboard, and the Dreamworks parade, especially when the penguins of Madagascar wave their fins around like this.” My mom starts shaking her hooves up and down in opposite directions.

“See what I mean, sista?” I asked.

“Loud and clear.” Rarity said as she walked over to the counter to get her Brûlée.

“How about you, Flutters? You need anything?” I asked.

“Oh, not really. I was just with Rarity, we had our spa get-together today, and since she said she was coming here, I couldn’t resist but to see you!” Flutters said.

“Awww, that’s sweet! A little too sweet, it’s making me uncomfee.” I said.

“Oh, I’m sorry.” Flutters said.

“No worries! Hey, mom, you know I was sick once when I was here right?” I asked.

“You mentioned it, yes.” Mom said.

“Well, it was Fluttershy here that took care of me. She sang Soft Dalek to me and everything!” I said.

“She sang Soft Dalek?” mom asked curiously.

“I sure did. It helped Flarey here get back in full health. Nice and strong again!” Fluttershy said as she was leaning close to me.

“See, mommy? She reminds me a lot of you! Whenever I’m sick, whenever I’m sad, or whenever I just need some attention and nopony else is available, or when there’s a honey jar stuck on my nose, Fluttershy is here to save the day!” I said. “Isn’t that right, Flutters?”

“I sure am!” Flutters said.

“Oh, that’s… great, Flare!” mom said as she started to sound a little down.

“That’s right!” I said.

“Are you feeling alright, Mrs. Gun?” Psyche asked.

“I’m alright, Blaze.” Mom said to him.

“I’m Psyche.” He corrected her. “Oh but it’s fine, you just met us. It’s completely normal!”

“No it isn’t.” Crystal said.

“Shhh!” Psyche shushed her.

“What? It isn’t.” Crystal said.

“Shut up!” Psyche whispered angrily at her. My mom was feeling a little bit confused for a bit there the way I was treating Fluttershy like a second mom. After everypony had their pizza, we all returned to the trailer. I was setting up the guest bedroom just for her so she can be comfortable, and my mom was looking at my fish.

“Hey, Darrel! Hey boo-boo! I missed you so much!” mom said to him.

“Wow I am so happy to see her, and yet I forgot who she was!” Darrel said as he excitedly swam around the front of the tank.

“Hey, Yo-dawg! Yo! Yo! YO, Yoyo! Hey, homie!” mom said to Yoyo.

“Hashtag swag, hashtag yolo.” Yoyo said.

“Please don’t say that.” Piddles asked.

“Hey, Pearlie! Hey Dorteey!” my mom said to them.

“Dorteey? Did she just call me Dorteey? There’s an H there, lady!” Dorthey called out.

“Hey at least she remembers me, and I like it when ponies call me Pearlie!” Pearl said.

“Hey, Pearlie!” Dorthey said.

“YOU can call me Pearl.” Pearl insisted.

“Hey, Rainbow! Hey, Peedles!” mom said to them.

“Peedles?! HA! That’s an hilarious nickname!” Rainbow laughed.

“Why me?” Piddles asked as he laid there on the rocks.

“Yo-dawg! Gotta get jiggy with it!” Yoyo said sounding like a rapper.

“You sound like a dork, Yoyo.” Pearl said.

“Yo, shorty, get-a low now! Get-a low, get-a low, get-a low, get-a low- TO THE WINDOOOOOOOOOW!” Yoyo rapped.

“I don’t like rappers that much.” Rainbow said.

“But, Rainboooooow! There’s always candy in wrappers! Wrappers are awesoooooome!” Darrel whined.

“Have you ever even eaten candy?” Rainbow asked.

“No, but I want to.” Darrel said.

“Darrel, you’re a fish; candy is bad for you.” Piddles said.

“Actually, candy is bad for ponies too, in fact poisonous, but they eat them anyway.” Rainbow explained.

“It’s weird that actual horses don’t eat sweet stuff, except for sugarcubes, but these horses do!” Dorthey explained.

“What is up with that?” Rainbow asked.

“Hey mommy, I got the room all ready for you!” I said.

“Thanks, pookie face!” mom said. “Hey, did you wear that Minions shirt I got you yet?” mom asked.

“I… of course I have!” I fibbed.

“Oh yeah? Then why do I see it hanging on your closet, unwrinkled?” mom asked.

“I… ironed it?” I fibbed.

“Don’t lie to me! You don’t know how to iron! You don’t even know how to do laundry!” mom yelled me.

“I do SO know how to do laundry!” I yelled back.

“Don’t yell at me, you jerk!” mom yelled.

“Oh I’m the jerk, huh?! What about the time you yelled at me after I told nana you weren’t using her money to get a patio, you were spending it on a cruise?!” I yelled.

“I didn’t want her mad! I always take the pain from her! All I get is complaining, complaining, complaining!” mom yelled.

“You said I shouldn’t lie!” I yelled.

“I was lying to keep nana from getting mad!” mom yelled.

“Aaaaaaaand these two are at it again.” Piddles said.

“When will it ever end?” Rainbow asked.

“Oh perfect for my next rap, homie!” Yoyo said.

“Oh! Maybe it doesn’t have to be candy wrappers; maybe it could be bubble wrap! Bubble wrap is so much fun!” Darrel said.

“Have you ever even used it?” Rainbow asked.

“No, but I seen Flare use them and he was having so much fun with it!” Darrel said.

“Seeing Flare and his mom blabber on like this is more stupid than the guy on the Call of Duty 3 box art.” Pearl said.

A cutaway shows the box art of Call of Duty 3, with all the soldiers firing at their enemies, and one of the soldiers near the front of the box yells to his friend at the very front: “Hey, moron! You’re facing the wrong way!”

And the guy up front says: “Lol how do I scope?” The cutaway ends.



“Look, all I’m saying is: just use the stuff I give you, alright?” mom asked.

“Alright, mommy, if you say so.” I said.

“Flare!” Spike yelled as he ran inside my trailer with a new game in his hand. “Dude, check this out!”

“Well, young dinosaur, has anypony ever told you to knock before entering somepony’s home?” mom asked.

“Don’t worry, mom; this is my friend Spike. Spike, mom.” I introduced them.

“Nice to make your acquaintance, mom.” Spike said with his claw out, hoping for a shake.

“So you’re the little dinosaur my pookie is friends with?” mom asked.

“Pookie?” Spike asked as he held in a chuckle.

“He’s not… he’s not a dinosaur, mom.” I said.

“Yeah, I am nothing like a dinosaur! Believe me, I took a biology test with one.” Spike said.

A cutaway shows Spike sitting down in a biology lab along with Barney the Dinosaur. Barney started to sing his I Love You song; “I love you, you love me, we’re a happy family, with great a big hug, and a kiss from me to you…”

“I know for certain you’re not my real father. I don’t kiss boys, you perv. Just because we’re the same color doesn’t make us the same species, let alone same blood.” Spike said. The cutaway ends.

“So anyways, brah, what did you want to show me?” I asked.

“I got Dead Island 2.” Spike said, showing me the case. “If you want, we can head to the lounge and play it, you and I.”

“That sounds like fun!” I said excitedly.

“My Luna, NO!” mom said as she takes the game from Spike.

“HEY!” Spike yelled.

“Flare, you should know better than playing these kinds of games with kids.” Mom said.

“I play these games with him all the time, and he has no problem with it. Do you, Spike?” I asked.

“Absolutely not! I’m a dragon! I can handle anything!” Spike said.

“If you can handle anything, then here’s a DVD of the Shining.” Mom said as she gives Spike the movie.

“And you just carry that around with you?” I asked.

“What is the Shining?” Spike asked.

“Watch it yourself and you’ll see what I mean, and don’t stop until you’ve watched the entire thing, including the trailers!” mom demanded.

“Okie dokie!” Spike said as he ran into my lounge to watch the movie.

“I never watched the Shining, what’s it like?” I asked.

“You really don’t wanna know.” Mom said. “Anyways, Flarey, did you want to show me around town?”

“Of course! I just would’ve thought you’d want to settle down first.” I said.

“Hey just play on the computer for the entire time I’m here? Is that all you do when you moved here?” mom asked.

“Mom, I haven’t been on the computer as much as I used to!” I said.

“You say that, but this is my first time here. How can I believe you?” mom asked.

“Would I lie to you?” I asked.

“Yes!” mom said.

“Oh, hush!” I said.

“Don’t tell me to hush!” mom yelled at me.

“Getting that deja-vu feeling again.” Rainbow said.

“Yeah, me too.” Pearl said.

“How about instead of this arguing, I’ll take you on that tour to town, alright?” I suggested.

“Good.” Mom said.

“Are we gonna hold hooves while we walk and squeeze them real tight until we hear a snap?” I asked.

“Of course, pookie face! Of course!” mom said. “You know, grandpa used to do that to me when we walked.”

“I still think grandpa was my past life.” I said as the two of us stepped out of the trailer and began our walk.

“Nice hotel!” Spike said as he watched the Shining. “I could tell something scary is gonna happen though. Like over there behind that door, there’s-“ After that moment, Spike hasn’t said a word the entire week, but this isn’t his story now, is it? So who cares? As I was giving my mom a tour around Ponyville, we stopped by Carousel Boutique, and when we got in, Rarity was already making a dress for her.

“Oh Bow, darling, you look splendid in that outfit!” Rarity said to my mom as she was dressed in an 18th century American outfit.

“I was only asking where the restroom is.” Mom said.

“I know, I know, but just look at that hair! So lovely!” Rarity said.

“You put a wig over it.” Mom said.

“Which is exactly why it looks so divine!” Rarity said.

“Flare why did you take me here again?” mom asked.

“I dunno lawl. You wanted a tour.” I said.

“Flare, don’t be a wiseguy.” Mom said. “You really get that from dad.”

“Is that a good thing?” I asked.

“Now with a little powder…” Rarity placed some white make-up powder all over my mom’s face.

“Ahhhhcooo!” mom sneezed.

“Gesundheit!” Rarity said.

“You could just say ‘bless you’ like everypony else.” I said.

“Flare!” mom yelled.

“I’m sorry, is there something wrong with my type of language?” Rarity asked, feeling a little bit insulted.

“Well, actually…” I said.

“No! No there’s not! Your accent is fine, Rarity.” Mom said.

“Just fine?” Rarity asked.

“It’s great!” mom said. “It’s very inspiring! Right, Flare?”

“It’s awesome. Awesome possum! And I’m not only saying that because my mom is here and she would kill me if I didn’t say that.” I said.

“Oh thank you, dear!” Rarity said happily. “You do know how to make a girl feel better about herself, Mrs. Gun!”

“You’re welcome!” mom said.

“Though I gotta say this, mom: why do you say you’re welcome when somepony says thank you, but when ponies say thank you after they sneeze, you don’t say you’re welcome then?” I asked.

“Done! Just look at yourself, Mrs. Gun!” Rarity said as she used her magic to place a mirror in front of my mom so she can check herself out. “You just look smashing!”

“HULK SMASH!” I yelled as I started punching Rarity’s mirror with some Hulk gloves. “RAWR!”

“GOOD HEAVENS!” Rarity yelled.

“FLARE!” mom yelled.

“What? I’m just having some fun! I saw Sweetie Belle doing it yesterday, and Rarity did freak out then.” I said.

“She’s my little sister, Flare.” Rarity informed me.

“Yeah it’s cute when little fillies do it, not full-grown stallions. You should learn to act your age!” mom suggested to me.

“But moooooooooom!” I whined.

“Go, say you’re sorry to Rarity!” mom demanded.

“You’re sorry to Rarity.” I said.

“The right way!” mom yelled.

“Grrr!” I turned around to look at Rarity, and then I mumbled, “Sorry, Rarit...”

“I’m sorry?” Rarity asked.

“Sorry, Rarity.” I mumbled again.

“Louder, Flare! Speak loud and clear!” mom demanded.

“SORRY, RARITY!” I yelled from the top of my lungs.

“Softer!” mom demanded.

“Well which way you want it?!” I asked.

“It’s quite alright, dear. I accept your apology.” Rarity said.

“You are not getting any computer time tonight.” Mom said to me.

“But I…” I said.

“Nope. Not another word.” Mom said.

I started groaning and I yelled, “SIGH!” as I started walking out the door.

“Don’t say ‘sigh’, just sigh!” mom demanded as I walked out of the Boutique.

“He gets his attitude from his daddy.” Mom said.

“Sorry to hear that.” Rarity said.

“He also has his eyes, but he’s fun, and he gets that from me.” Mom said.

“I can see that.” Rarity nodded with an embarrassing smile.

“Now all that cooking stuff, that comes from grandma.” Mom said.

“Uh huh.” Rarity nodded.

“I’m sorry about him. Is he normally this way?” mom asked.

“K-kind of. I learned to live with it. He’s learning what he needs to know from us.” Rarity said.

“That’s pretty much the main reason why he came here, right?” mom asked.

“Yes, indeed.” Rarity said.

“So can I have this dress gift-wrapped?” mom asked.

“What?! Gift wrap a dress?! That’s mad!” Rarity yelled.

“Yeah, I can see why Flare doesn’t like your attitude that much.” Mom said. Rarity sighs and shakes her head, and then she mumbled to herself, “As if MY mother wasn’t bad enough with pointing out my attitude.” 

“Oh honey, no need to get upset. How about taking an aspirin and chill with me?” Rarity’s mom suggested.

“Aspirins are for headaches, mother.” Rarity corrected her.

“They can also be used for attitudes.” Rarity’s mom said.

“And for stomach aches.” My mom added. “Oh wait, I think I’m done here.” So after I finished giving my mom a tour around Ponyville, I left her in my trailer to take a nap, and I went over to the Cider Bar with my friends so I can talk out my problems, but before then, we were all watching some TV from our booth.

“We now return to Everybody Hates Present Day Chris.” The TV announcer said.

“Man, Voldemort, what kind of dark lord are you? You let Harry Potter slip right under your nose!” Chris Rock complains to Lord Voldemort.

“Right under my what?” Voldemort asked.

“You know it’s weird that Voldemort had a nose in the first Harry Potter movie when he was just the back of Professor Quirrell’s head, but in movies 4-7 part 2, he didn’t have a nose when he was in full form. What’s up with that?” Crystal asked.

“He looked creepier in the first movie, and it was PG rated, and in all the other movies he was in, he looks like he’s from a Saturday movie cartoon, and those movies are PG-13. Ah mean really!” Engie said.

“Movies are really weird sometimes. Same goes with video games. They allow blood and gore, but they don’t allow nudity, and it really discusses me.” Psyche said.

“What doesn’t discuss you, Psyche?” Crystal asked.

“Flare, are ya alright?” Aqua asked. “Ya are havin’ your fourth cider right now.”

“Meh, three in a half.” I corrected him.

“Is everything alright, mate?” Aqua asked.

“My mom’s been a pain since she came to town. I keep forgetting how much she complains over the last single detail!” I complained.

“I can see where you get your charms from.” Psyche teased.

“HEEEEY! I don’t complain about everything! Holy Wizard of Strength! Why is there a spec on my cider glass? The fan is on too high, and to top it all off, THIS ISN’T EVEN THE BOOTH WE NORMALLY SIT IN!” I complained.

“Uhh, yeah it is.” Engie corrected me.

“WHY MUST PONIES ALWAYS CORRECT ME?! I’m ALWAYS wrong, and everypony else is ALWAYS right!” I yelled.

“FLARE! For Faust’s sake! Calm down!” Blaze yelled.

“Sigh. Sorry, Blaze. Wasn’t just the bullies that bothered me back at home. My parents weren’t really the best of friends of mine either. Mom always complains and she’s helpless, and my dad works too much, and he never cares. At home, I was only able to rely on my fish, and my sister for company.” I said.

“Yeah, I know what it’s like. Seeing ponies argue always gives me flashbacks to my parents arguing all the time.” Aqua said. “I mean, what’s the use of all this arguing? Neither side is gonna win! Hey, honey, how about putting another log on the fire? But dear, I put the log on the fire last time! You’re the only one that can do it! You’re a unicorn! Honey, I’m tired and beat from all the working! Get off my case! But can you at least do me a favor and get some water from the well? Why bother? We can just get some from the sink! But, dear the well has fresher water!”

“Uhh, Aqua?” Blaze asked.

“What’s the difference?! It all comes from the same place!” Aqua keeps arguing with himself. “Can’t I just relax for a change?! Oh look, ya made Wind Racer cry! It was your fault! No it wasn’t, it just means she’s hungry! No it doesn’t! IT JUST MEANS YOU’RE BEING AN INCONSIDERED JERK!” Aqua started deep breathing, and the five of us were all looking at him awkwardly as he was having a whole argument with himself. Aqua calmed himself down and said, “I-I’m sorry. That doesn’t normally happen.”

“I know, you’re normally one of the calm and quiet ones, what happened?” Psyche asked.

“Just a little flashback. I really don’t want to think about it.” Aqua said as he started gulping down the rest of his cider.

“Anyways back to what I was talking about.” I started. “I’m not sure what to do with my mom.”

“Maybe you two should try a relaxing activity together that you both like.” Blaze suggested.

“You know, mom doesn’t normally yell it at me when other ponies are around. Maybe the five of you should come with me.” I suggested.

“But it’s Mother’s Day. It’s a day for just you and her.” Crystal said.

“I know, Crystal, but I’m not sure what else I can do. I think if I just keep my friends close, it should help. What normally ticks her off is my attitude. Maybe having you five with me can really make a difference.” I explained.

“Ok sure, I have no problem with it. I have no plans tomorrow.” Psyche said.

“Can ah bring my ma with me?” Engie asked.

“Of course, Engie!” I said.

“Good. She may need a little oiling and upgrades though.” Engie said.

“Sounds goo- wait, what?” I asked.

“Don’t worry ‘bout it. It’s not really any of your concern.” Engie said.

“How can it not be? You just said- you know what, N-V-M.” I said.

“That’s what I’ve been tryin’ to say.” Engie said.

“Alright I am REALLY confused right now.” I said. “More confused than Ursula in Little Mermaid when she and Arial made that deal.” A cutaway shows Arial having a meet with Ursula the sea witch about wanting legs.

“Ursula, I want legs.” Arial requested.

“Alright, but no voice.” Ursula said.

“Deal!” Arial said. Just then, Ursula used her witchcraft powers to get rid of Arial’s mermaid fin, and then her entire bottom half turns into black octopus legs. Arial tried to complain, but her voice wasn’t there.

“Oh you look gorgeous, my dear! Remember: three days of getting your prince to love you.” Ursula said. “Now if you excuse me, I have to go to Japan because I have another movie to film; an adult content film to be exact.” The cutaway ends.

Back at my trailer, I was making dinner for my mom as well as my friends. Crystal, Blaze, and Psyche were sitting at the table as my mom was washing the dishes, Aqua was in the bathroom, and Engie was helping my mom in putting the dishes away. “You know, mom, you don’t have to do the dishes. You’re my guest of honor.” I said.

“Flarey, you know I love washing the dishes.” Mom said.

“Why can’t I do it?” I asked.

“Because you’re making dinner.” Mom said.

“But I wanna wash the dishes toooooo!” I whined.

“C’mon, Flare, if this what your mom wants, let her have it.” Blaze said.

“But her letting me do stuff is the way of her saying ‘I love you’.” I said. “Her letting me do stuff and forcibly not letting her is her way of saying ‘I really love you’.”

“So, Engineer, what do you do for a living?” mom asked.

“Ah mostly repair mechanical errors around town like TVs or computers, and ah also build robots. Isn’t that right, mom?” Engie asked his mom who was a robot made out of a newspaper vendor and other random junk.

“Affermative.” Engie’s mom said.

“Is that your real mom?” my mom asked.

“Of course she is! We’re flesh in blood!” Engie said as his eye twitched from inside his goggles.

“How about you Blaze, where’s your mom?” my mom asked.

“She’s uhhh, she’s not really a big fan of traveling.” Blaze excused.

“Wait a minute; ah thought ya said she was sick?” Engie asked.

“Yeah… that too.” Blaze stuttered.

“How about you, Aqua?” mom asked.

“Aqua’s in the restroom.” Psyche said.

“Oh… which one are you again?” mom asked.

Psyche was silent for a moment to give my mom a confusing look. “I’m Psyche.” He repeated himself.

“That’s not really an easy name to remember.” Mom said.

“I know right?!” Crystal yelled as she stood her chair and slammed on the table as she said that.

“Over dramatic a bit, Crystal?” Psyche asked.

“So where’s your mom?” mom asked.

“I’d… rather not talk about it.” Psyche said.

“Oh no, I’m done with you, I’m talking to her now.” Mom pointed to Crystal as mom was drying one of the drinking glasses.

“My mom said she’s running a bit late because she’s dealing with a bit of a crisis in Fillydelphia.” Crystal said.

“What happened?” Blaze asked.

“She’s dealing with a crisis in Fillydelphia.” Crystal repeated herself.

“Yes, I know, but what’s the problem?” Blaze asked.

“She’s dealing… with a crisis… in Filly… delphia.” Crystal repeated herself. Blaze sighs and facehoofs himself.

“Wow, am I the only mom here?” mom asked.

“I’m afraid so.” Blaze said.

“Well how about this? For this Mother’s Day, I’ll be all your moms!” mom suggested.

“Oh you don’t have to do that!” Blaze said.

“Yeah, mom, you don’t have to do that.” I said.

“But it would be great!” mom said.

“Yeah, it certainly would!” Crystal nodded.

“Yeah, even though ah already have a mom with me, dibs on that!” Engie said excitedly.

“Hey, do any of ya know that Spike’s in the lounge, rolling around and mumbling to himself looking paranoid?” Aqua asked as he joined in.

“Aqua! Flare’s mom is volunteering on being all of our moms this Mother’s Day!” Crystal said. “Wait, maybe I should’ve added a little suspense in the beginning. Hey, Aqua? Guess what?!”

“Wow! I really don’t know what to say. I mean, nothing can replace my mom, but if ya’re volunteerin’, I can’t say no to an offer like that.” Aqua said.

“You were supposed to say ‘what’, Aqua.” Crystal said.

“Wait, mom! This is our holiday! You and me together! Why are you volunteering in spending equal time with my friends?” I asked.

“Flarey, don’t be stubborn. Your friends need a mom this holiday, and since I’m the only one here, I volunteer to be all of your mom!” mom said. All my friends started to cheer.

“No, mom! It is you being stubborn right now!” I yelled.

“Flare, c’mon! She’s offering, and we’re accepting. Have you ever wanted to have multiple brothers and sisters?” Crystal asked.

“We’re siblings from other mothers. We don’t-“ while I was talking, I was taking dinner to the table, and I wanted to sit down, but Blaze was on my seat. “You’re in my spot.” I told him, and then Blaze moved to a different seat, and I sat down. “As I was saying, we’re siblings from other mothers. We don’t share the same mother.” I corrected them.

“Flare, look, they need a mom. They all look so sad.” Mom said to me. All my friends gave me the puppy-dog look eyes.

“But mooooom!” I whined.

“No, Flare, I made my choice.” Mom said.

“Flare, don’t be like that. Please, dude? Please share your mom? It’s just for one day.” Blaze begged.

“Ya won’t regret it, partner.” Engie said. I thought it over a bit, but while I was thinking about it, the food I was cooking started to burn, but no one cared since my trailer as an automatic sprinkler system in case of a fire, and only in the place it’s burning, so my gaming systems in the other room should be fine.

“20 bits.” I demanded.

“15.” Engie offered.

“10!” I demanded.

“Deal!” Engie said.

“Yay!” I cheered. So we ate our burnt and soaking wet dinner, and everypony went on home. The next day came, and I was doing laundry with my mom. “I’m glad we’re doing something together; just the two of us.” I said.

“Sure. One thing I miss while on vacation is doing laundry.” Mom said as she started pouring the Downey into the washing machine.

“Careful, you’re putting in too much Downey. You’ll make my vests too soft and it’ll make me sleepy.” I said.

“Well this takes me back, me doing laundry, you criticizing me.” Mom said. Just then, I hear a knock on the door.

“Come in!” I yelled. Just then, Crystal walks inside with a basket full of laundry.

“Hey, mom! Hey, Flare!” Crystal said.

“My name isn’t mom.” I said.

“I was talking to your mom.” Crystal corrected me.

“That’s obscured!” I complained. “My name is always first!”

“But today is Mother’s Day, Flare; in short, your mom is first today!” Crystal said.

“Thank you, Crystal! What’s with the laundry?” mom asked.

“Oh my dryer isn’t working so I thought I could dry my clothes in yours.” Crystal requested.

“Why can’t you just hang them up to dry?” mom asked.

“Because then they won’t have that fresh clean laundry smell.” Crystal explained.

“You gotta admit, that is a fair point.” I said.

“Like when you ask me to wash your blanky?” mom asked.

“I told you, mom! It was a white shirt I liked smelling!” I whispered angrily at her.

“You treated it like a blanky.” Mom said.

“Hey there’s nothing wrong for having a blanky, Flare.” Crystal said. “I’m 24, and I still sleep with a blanky.”

“I’m 25 and I don’t sleep with blankys; I sleep with teddy bears.” I said.

“Wow, that’s just sad.” Crystal said as she started dumping her laundry in my dryer. “Hey, mom, if you don’t mind, I’d-“

“Crystal, I hope you’re not gonna give my mom something that’s gonna make me feel bad because Engie already did that this morning.” I said. A cutaway shows me making scrambled eggs, strawberries cut in half, and maple hay bacon strips for my mom before she wakes up. “Yep! This will show my mom I am the best son ever!” I poured some orange juice in a cup, took the toast out of the toaster, and put some butter on the side, and I placed it all in a tray with a little flower vase on it. I walked to the guest bedroom so I can serve my mom breakfast in bed, but when I got there, Engie was playing his guitar while singing Red Solo Cup, and serving my mom Cheerios and pancakes in bed.

“Bravo! Bravo! Such a lovely sound and taste to wake up to! I’ll tell you, Engie, this is so far the best wake up I’ve ever had!” mom said. I started to angrily grind my teeth to what I just witnessed. The cutaway ends.

“Don’t worry, Flare, I’m not trying to give your mom anything right now.” Crystal said.

“Well, I hope you’re not asking her out anywhere because Psyche already ruined that.” I said.

A cutaway shows me printing out two tickets for a Linkin Park concert playing today. “Yep! Mom’s gonna less than three these! She loves Linkin Park, especially when they arrive into town on a wooden train full of heavy metal!” I said excitedly, but when I got towards the front door, my mom and Psyche barge inside my trailer, laughing, and wearing Linkin Park clothes and merchandise.

“Psyche that was the best concert ever! Thanks for the tickets and back-stage V-I-P passes!” mom said. “How did you get them? I thought they were sold out?”

“When you really care about your mother, even a temporary mother, a thankful child would do anything for her!” Psyche said.

“Oh Psyche, you’re such a sweet-talker!” mom said as she pinched his cheek (his face cheek, by the way).

Psyche walked over to me and whispered, “I printed out these tickets and passes illegally. Please don’t tell her that, alright?” I started to angrily grind my teeth again. The cutaway ends.

“Look, Flare, I was only going to ask her if she can choose a dress for me to wear when I take her out for mini-golf!” Crystal said as she takes out two different dresses to show to my mom, one green one with short sleeves, and one blue one with long sleeves and a longer skirt. “Now I can’t tell which one is prettier. I mean, the green one matches your eyes, but the blue one matches your favorite color. I’m not sure how to impress you more.” Crystal said as I angrily grinded my teeth again.

“Hey, either one is fine by me.” Mom said.

“Oh but, mom, this is YOUR day, you should choose!” Crystal said.

“I don’t care, it’s completely up to you!” mom said.

“How about you stop making me look bad?” I asked her.

“Oh, I’m sorry, Flare. Whatever dress mom doesn’t pick for me, you can have the other one.” Crystal offered.

“I don’t want either of those dresses! I prefer a darker blue dress!” I said angrily.

“Yeah, you’re right. A darker blue will certainly suffice me! Thanks, Flare!” Crystal said.

My face started to glow red, redder than usual, and steam popped out of my ears and I started jumping up and down yelling, “FRIEND, FRIEND, FRIEND!”

“Flare, you’re not gonna melt down again are you?” mom asked.

“Melt down?! I hope Flare is not made of nuclear radiation, because if that were the case, I’m leaving town!” Crystal said.

“I’m going for a walk!” I said angrily as I started marching towards the front door, and my marches were so loud, it sounded like a giant stomping.

“He gets his attitude from his daddy, and he has his eyes.” Mom said.

“Oh stop using dad as an excuse!” I yelled as I slammed the door. 

After an awkward silence, my mom said, “Now all that cooking, THAT comes from grandma.”

When I got outside, I saw Aqua sitting in front of my house with a six-pack of grape cider. “Aqua?” I said.

“Oh heeeeeeey, Flare!” Aqua said and hiccuped.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“Oh I’m hanging out with my six family members! Unfortunately, three are dead.” Aqua said as he finished a bottle of cider that his unicorn magic was carrying. “And now four.”

“You’re taking this no mom thing really seriously, huh?” I asked.

“You don’t know the half of it.” Psyche said as he takes one of the cider bottles.

“I pretty much don’t know any of it.” I said. 

My mom opens the door and said, “Oh there you are, Flare. Oh, hey Psyche, Aqua!” 

“Hey, mommy!” Aqua said as he hiccuped.

“You could tell Aqua is not sober because he always says ‘mother’.” Psyche said.

“Aww, Aqua, is everything alright?” mom asked.

“Of course! Why wouldn’t it be?” Aqua asked happily.

“Are you sure?” mom asked.

“No.” Aqua said as he started crying. “I’m so lonely, I have no family except for my sister!”

“Oh yes, born alone, die alone, it’s a tragic pony emotion, now if you excuse my mom, her and I are going mini-golf together! Right, mom?” I asked.

“Wait a minute! I thought I was taking her mini-golf?” Crystal complained.

“Finders keepers, losers crying. Tongue face.” I teased as I stuck my tongue out at her.

“Flare, you have a friend that’s upset.” Mom said.

“Two friends actually.” Psyche added.

“What do you do when a friend is sad?” mom asked.

“Offer them a hot beverage.” I said.

“And when they’re drunk as a skunk with cider, what do we offer?” mom asked.

“Coffee.” I said.

“And what do we do it with?” mom asked. I gave Aqua a big ugly grin because I wasn’t really in the mood to smiling right now, and then I walked back into my trailer to make the coffee for Aqua and Psyche.

“Thank you… mom.” Psyche said happily.

“I’m not gonna get my mini-golf, am I?” I complained.

“You want some oreos?” Crystal asked.

“Double stuff?” I asked.

“No, regular.” Crystal said.

“Nice. Kick a pony when he’s down.” I complained. After I made the coffee, Blaze and Engie showed up to join my humiliation. It got even more humiliating when she started showing my friends baby pictures of me.

“And that picture here is Flare in the bathtub.” Mom pointed.

“Why are you showing us this? Won’t Flare get embarrassed?” Blaze asked.

“Oh chill-ax, Blaze. What is there to be embarrassed about? Ponies don’t normally wear clothes anyway.” Engie said.

“Yeah that’s funny word ‘chill-ax’.” Crystal chuckled.

“Hey what’s that a picture of?” Psyche asked.

“Oh this is adorable! It was Flare’s first pizza!” mom said.

“That he ate or that he made?” Crystal asked.

“That he ate of course! He’s only like… 2 in this picture.” Psyche said.

“1 ½, actually.” Mom corrected him. “And it was actually the first pizza he made! He was an expert cook at his youth, and unlike other foals, he had a problem with us changing his diaper.”

“Why? Even though I’m afraid to ask.” Aqua asked.

“Oh he kept wanting his privacy. He didn’t know how to do it himself. It was a miracle when he started potty training.” Mom said as she sighed. “Best 10th birthday ever!”

“Alright, I got the coffee ready.” I said as I gave them to Psyche and Aqua.

“It’s decaf, right? I can only drink decaf.” Aqua said.

“And mine has to have decaf.” Psyche said.

“Thanks for telling me before you drank.” I said as I switched the coffees, and then they both drank them. “How are they?”

“Ya had it right before ya switched them; ya gave me non-decaf.” Aqua said.

“Yeah that’s my luck lately.” I said as I switched the coffees again. “That better?”

“Umm… I’m sorry, but Psyche already drank from this.” Aqua said awkwardly.

“Oh I don’t mind.” Psyche said as he started drinking from the same spot Aqua drank out of.

“Ew.” Engie said.

“Hey mom, listen…. I just wanted to apologize for my behavior before. It was unacceptable, and I learned my lesson.” I said.

“Apology accepted.” Mom said.

“Great! So that means you and I can just go to mini-golf alone then!” I said excitedly.

“No, I’m still allowing your friends to come along.” Mom said.

“B-but…. Mooooooom, I apologized……. and it was hard because it was a simple fact that I didn’t do anything wrong.” I explained.

“Flare, your friends need a mom.” My mom said.

“AH DON’T! MINE IS AT HOME, SHOWERIN’!” Engie yelled as his eye twitched again.

“But pookie faaaaace!” I whined.

“You call her pookie face too?” Crystal asked.

“She’s my best friend pookie face, and I’m her pookie face best friend!” I said. “We even have our own songs we made together! Like this: We’re friends foreverrrrrr! Go ahead, mom! Your go!”

“We’re friends foreverrrrr!” my mom sang.

“We’re friends… forever, bum bum bum bum!” I sang.

“Best friends… forever, bum bum bum bum!” she sang.

“See? We have a special bond, a bond that we simply cannot share with other ponies. Nothing personal, but she’s MY mom and nopony can take that away from me!”

“And I agree with you, Flare. But your friends need a substitute mom.” Mom said.

“Mom, quit being stubborn!” I demanded.

“Are they being serious, Blaze?” Crystal asked.

“I guess.” Blaze said.

“Yeah I agree with them, you do look like a mare.” Crystal said, and Blaze sighs.

“Flare, she’s not being stubborn, you are.” Psyche said.

“She’s offerin’ to fill our empty spaces with the love that we couldn’t have in our teenage years at least.” Aqua said.

“Yeah, she’s being very considerate to our well-bein’…. Not that ah need it; ah still got a mom!” Engie said as he twitched his eye again. I started to grind my teeth angrily once again.

“Come on, Flare! Come with us to mini-golf! I promise we’ll be one big happy family, just like what your mom wants! It’s her day!” Blaze said.

“No. I’m gonna just stand right here until she changes her mind.” I pouted.

“Well, you’re gonna be standing there all day then.” Mom said.

“Come on, let’s not force Flare into anything. Let’s go golfing!” Crystal said as the six of them started walking out of my trailer to go play mini-golf.

“Ah call the orange ball!” Engie yelled just before the trailer door shut.

“I’m not the stubborn one, she is! I’m supposed to be the one pleasing my mom this day; not them! This is starting to be an epic fail of a Mother’s Day! Wouldn’t you agree, Spike?” I asked Spike as he was laying on the ground, still in paralyzed in fear. “You know what? This is Mother’s Day, and my mom hasn’t been my Mother since I was still living in Mareami! Since I started living here, Fluttershy has been my mother! You know what? Forget my actual mom! I’m gonna go see my Ponyville mom: Fluttershy! My true mom! The one that always took care of me, and never gave me any problems!”

“Who was there when I was sick? Fluttershy!” I shouted. “Who was there when I was sad? Fluttershy! Who doesn’t judge me of my flaws and never gives me any problems? Fluttershy! Who’s the one that… umm… umm…. who’s the…. Umm…. w-who’s the one… meh, I’ll think about it on the way to her house.” So I walked on over to Fluttershy’s cottage so she can cheer me up, and I can give her the Mother’s Day she deserves. Fluttershy let me into her house and asked me to take a seat.

“Thank you for coming to visit me, Flare. With Twilight, Pinkie, Rarity, and Rainbow Dash busy with their mothers, and AppleJack visiting the cemetery for the day, and as I haven’t spoken to my mom in years since she hates animals, I really appreciate the company.” she said.

“You’re welcome, Flutters. I was really in need of your help, that’s the main reason why I’m here.” I said.

“Well, no matter what, I’ll always be here to help! What seems to be the problem?” Flutters asked.

“My mom.” I said.

“Oh, I’m sorry.” Flutters said.

“Why are you apologizing? It’s not your fault.” I said.

“I know, but… I just… feel sorry. I mean, I don’t have to if you don’t want me to.” Flutters said.

“See? That’s why you’re better than my mom! You never give me a hard time!” I said.

“Oh, I’m sorry for asking, but… how is your mom giving you a hard time?” Flutters asked.

“Well, unlike you, she’s doesn’t judge me, she doesn’t give me a hard time, she doesn’t yell over every single thing, and… listen to the last phone message she gave me!” I explained as I took out my phone and put it on speaker so she can hear the last message my mom gave me.

My mom’s voice message said, “Hey, pookie face my friend! I’m looking for you! Hello? Ring ring ring! Ring ring ring! Hello? I’m calling you! Alright, I guess you’re busy right now. I love you so much, just checking! Poke! Call me back, alright please? I love you! Bye bye!”

“CAN’T YOU SEE HOW PUSHY SHE IS?!” I yelled.

“Oh, well… she actually sounds like a very nice mare.” Flutters said.

“She is nice, and I love her with all my less than threes! It’s just…. It’s complicated. It’s not so much of her yelling and attitudes; it’s more of… she pays more attention to my friends than she does to me. That stuff she does doesn’t really bother me that much.” I explained.

“Well…. Why Is she hanging with your friends more?” Flutters asked.

“All their moms are ‘unavailable’ at this time, so she offered to become their mom for today.” I said.

“That sounds sweet.” Flutters said.

“Sweet? SWEET?! Do you even know what they’ve been doing all day?! They’re trying to become better children than me! They’re trying to make me feel bad!” I yelled.

Meanwhile, my mom and my friends were walking past Fluttershy’s house on the way to golf. “Are you sure Flare is here?” my mom asked.

“He’s upset right now, and whenever he’s upset, he goes over to Fluttershy’s house.” Blaze explained.

“That sounds awfully nice of her to take care of him when he’s sad.” Mom said.

“You know, I never get that: ‘Awfully nice’. Does that mean it’s awful, or it’s nice?” Crystal asked. 

So my mom walked over to Fluttershy’s door and was just about to ring her doorbell, but she overhears the conversation we're having. “You know, Flutters… sometimes I stop and think, why is she my mom? If she wants to be the mom of my friends… I guess I can’t force that, but… because she did that, I feel betrayed; I feel she just wants to disown me, and leave me abandoned, like leaving me on a church doorstep.” I explained.

“But she didn’t, right?” Flutters asked.

“I know she didn’t, but… you’re there for me, right Flutters?” I asked.

“Of course I am, Flare! I’ll ALWAYS be there for you!” Flutters said.

“Thanks. I mean, if you were my mom, things would be a lot easier for me!” I said as I gave Fluttershy a big hug, and she hugged me back and nuzzled my head. My mom heard everything outside, and she sadly walked out of her yard and back towards my friends.

“So how did it go with Flare?” Blaze asked.

“You know what, Psyche?” mom asked.

“Blaze.” Blaze corrected her.

“Oh what’s the difference? No matter which one of you I talk to, I’m this much closer to losing Flare as a son, and I cannot have that.” Mom said sadly.

“What do ya mean?” Aqua asked.

“I think it’s best I just return to Mareami.” Mom said.

“What? No, don’t go now! Where’s mah second mom when ah need her!” Engie begged as his eye twitched again.

“You don’t have to leave!” Psyche begged.

“I’m sorry, but I do. I think I caused Flare way too much pain since I first came here. I should just go home, and I won’t interfere with his personal life again.” Mom said as she started walking away sadly.

“But…. Bow… please!” Blaze begged. She just walked away, and she didn’t look back. My friends started to feel bad, but they knew what they had to do, so they walked up towards Fluttershy’s door. I was still hugging Flutters inside her cottage, and she seemed to enjoy it more than I thought, and as we were hugging, the door knocked.

“Come in!” Flutters yelled. My friends opened the door and walked inside.

“Flare, we need to talk.” Blaze said.

“What happened? I thought you were all mini-golfing with YOUR mom?” I asked with an attitude.

“You see, that’s the thing, dude.” Blaze said.

“Look, brahs, it’s fine… if you really wanna spend this much time with her, steal her from me, then I won’t get in your way. Fluttershy is taking care of me, and by tomorrow, this will all be over. She’ll be my mom again, and not yours.” I said.

“Yeah, well, maybe she won’t be EITHER of our’s!” Psyche said.

“Psyche, don’t be ridiculous! At least don’t be more ridiculous than you usually are.” I said.

Psyche sighs and said, “You know what, Flare? Because of YOUR stubbornness, your mom is leaving town! YOUR OWN MOM! You know, you’re lucky to have a mom! There are ponies out there that have no moms! In fact, there are ponies out there that don’t have families at all! You gotta stop being selfish! Disowning your mom is the most hateful thing a pony can do! Unlike some of us, we never had a chance to grow up fully with our moms! YOU’RE LUCKY because YOU do! Your mom is still around, and you just turned your back on her!” 

“Wait…. So…. I have the feeling you’re trying to tell me something.” I said.

“You’re a humongous JERK!” Psyche said.

“Oh.” I said. “Oh no! I beg to differ! Out of all of us, I was the most friendly! I was only telling my mom not to hang with you because I really care about her! You all were stealing her from me!” 

“Flare! We weren’t stealing her from you! Our moms are not around!” Blaze explained.

“Mine is.” Engie said.

“ENGIE, GROW UP! Your mom is a robot! Stop believing in stuff that aren’t true and grow some muscle, man!” Blaze yelled at him. Engie just stood there in silence, and then Blaze turned to me and said, “Your mom is leaving Ponyville in sorrow, and it’s all your fault!” I started to feel upset. I looked down at the ground and thought for a bit.

“Wow… I… didn’t realize it.” I said.

“Flare, just think about all the times your mom has been there for you!” Blaze said.

“Oh…. I know she’s there for me. I know she’d never replace me! I guess…. Maybe I was a bit jealous.” I said.

“A BIT?!” all my friends yelled at the same time.

“A BIT?!” I yelled. “See? I joined along.”

“Flare… I think you should go home… look at the pictures on your wall… and look at your refrigerator.” Fluttershy said.

“Why?” I asked.

“Trust me, Flare.” Fluttershy placed her hoof on my shoulder and nodded. “Do it.” So I did what she said, I headed on home.

“You know, I’ve been going to Flare’s trailer since Faust knows how long, and I never seen Flare use his exercise equipment.” Crystal said.



When I got to my trailer, I walked inside, and Total Eclipse of the Heart by Bonnie Tyler started playing in the background as I looked at pictures of my mom and I. One of the pictures showed me as a foal in my mom’s arms, one showed her taking care of me while I was sick, another one showed me feeding her ice cream, and the next one showed me dumping the whole bucket on her head, and the next one was her putting me in time out after I dumped the whole ice cream bucket on her head, the next one showed her and I wearing costumes for Nightmare Night when I was Jango Fett and she was a baby and I took her binky, and the next one showed her potty training me while I was reading Death Note, and the next one showed both of us making Hamburger Helper together but without using actual meat since we’re ponies, and the last one showed a picture that was taken just a couple of months after I left Mareami and we were hugging. After that I just sadly walked into my kitchen and saw drawings that I made for her, and a note that said: ‘Mommy, will you marry me? – Flarr, age 6.’ (yeah, I didn’t really know how to spell my name then). When I looked at that note, tears started to fall out of my eyes. “Crying face.” I said. “WHAT HAVE I DONE?!” I was wearing a tuxedo and started running out of my trailer and to the trainstation as Bonnie Tyler was singing: “And I need you now tonight!” and on the way to the station, I saw a flower merchant, and I bought some flowers, and I was so close to the trainstation.

“All board for Mareami!” the conductor yelled.

“WAAAAAAAAAAAAAIT!” I yelled, but I was too late. The conductor went inside the train and the train left for Mareami.

“NOOOOOOOO!” I yelled. “MOM! My flesh and blood! My one and only mom! What have I done?! I’m a failure as a son! I should’ve known better than to be so shell fish! I mean… be so selfish!” I felt like I was about to cry, but then I felt a tap on my shoulder, and it was my mom standing behind me.

“I knew you’d feel that way.” She said.

“MOM!” I yelled excitedly as I gave her a big hug. “I am so sorry! I didn’t mean any of what I said before! I guess… with us being apart for so long, I guess I felt that we should spend more time together, but when I saw you with my friends, I just got… SO ANGRY! I felt enraged, and I thought you’d abandon me!”

“Flarey, I would NEVER abandon you! You’re my son, and you always will be! Yes, we do have problems sometimes. I get mad, you meltdown… but I could never replace you! I thought with your friends being alone for Mother’s Day, I wanted to fill in that empty space for them.” Mom explained.

“You really are the best mom in the world!” I smiled.

She smiled as well and said, “I know I am.”

“I thought you said dad was the wiseguy in the family?” I asked.

“Well…. I guess he’s a bad influence on me too.” Mom teased.

“I know you’d never abandon me mom, but dad’s an idiot not to go with you! Why didn’t he come to Ponyville?” I asked.

“You know what, Flare? You’re right about dad. If you should be mad at anypony, you should be mad at him.” Mom said. We both chuckled and we gave eachother a hug again.

“Oh, mom! On the way here, I got you some flowers!” I said.

“Oh how nice! Where are they?” mom asked.

“They’re right here.” I said with my mouth full, and holding my hoof out, but there was nothing there. “Hey where did the flowers go?!”

“You know what, Flare? I’m not gonna complain about your eating disorder this time.” Mom said, and then I burped up a flower petal, but before it could hit the ground, I caught it with my tongue like a frog. Leave no petal uneaten!

Later that night, my mom, my friends, and I all went to the mini-golf course to play some golf together, and while we were at it, I was writing a letter to Princess Luna. It goes: “Dear Princess Luna, Mother’s Day is one of the most important days of the year, because it shows your mom how much you care, and no matter what, she’ll always be there for you. There are ponies out there that don’t have mothers, and you should be lucky that you still have one, that’s what makes you better than those miserable motherless ponies. I’ve learned that you should always be grateful on what your mom gives, because your mom can be the best friend anypony can ever have.”

“You need me to spell check that for you, dude?” Psyche asked.

“Oh no thanks. I’m not gonna be sending this for a while, not until Spike gets out of that paranoia.” I said as I placed the scroll in my vest pocket.

“Hey, Flare, thanks for letting us borrow your mom for the rest of the day. It’s better than thinkin’ ah actually got one. That was unhealthy.” Engie said.

“You all can use my mom whenever you wish. Well… as long as dad doesn’t catch you.” I said. Over on the windmill hole, my mom whacks the ball with the golf club and it rolls over to the windmill, right through it, and it rolls towards the hole, but when it gets to the hole, it just leans on the edge and doesn’t go through.

“Oh my Luna!” mom complained.

“Awww, sorry mom. Better luck next time.” Aqua said.

My mom smirks at Aqua, and then she leans her head towards the ball, and her horn starts to glow, and she yells, “Imma firin mah arrows!” and then a bunch of glowing arrows shoots out of her horn and gets shot everywhere in the course, and the impact makes the ball go inside the horn. “YES! Wooo! That was awesome!” mom yelled.

“YEAH YOU GO MOM!” I yelled.

“If you were gonna use magic, you could’ve used levitation, mom.” Blaze informed her.

“Mom? Why are you calling her mom, son?” a voice from the distance yelled out, and just then, a dragon started flying from the sky and landing over at the golf course.

“MOM?!” Blaze yelled.

“Hello, son.” The dragon said.

“Mom? THIS… is your mom?” Crystal asked.

“I’m a draconian, remember?” Blaze asked. “My mom is a dragon, and my dad is a pony.”

“I thought you said she doesn’t like traveling?” Psyche asked.

“Ah thought ya said she was sick?” Engie asked.

“What’s wrong, Blaze? Too embarrassed to tell your friends about me?” the dragon asked.

“Psyche, Aqua, Engie, Crystal, Flare, Bow, this is my mom Demona.” Blaze said embarrassingly.

“Nice to meet you all.” Demona said.

“Likewise! The second dragon I met on this trip!” my mom said excitedly.

“You know, you can’t spell Demona without demon!” Crystal teased.

“What?” Blaze asked.

“Hey, Demona? Ever noticed your son looks like a mare?” Crystal asked.

Demona chuckled and said, “Yes I do, young pony. He gets that from his grandfather, whom, was a mare.” She teased.

“Sh-shut up, mom.” Blaze said embarrassingly.

“Well, Flare, I’m proud of you! You were able to make things right with your mom!” Fluttershy said.

“Well, I couldn’ve done it without you, Flutters!” I said.

She blushed and said, “Oh… well… maybe… well, anyways, I gotta get my little Angel to bed. He’s so tired, and I promised him I’d read him Peter Cottontail.” She nuzzled Angel as Angel himself was sitting on her back, thumping his foot and smiling over the nuzzling.

“Ooooh, that bunny is there is gonna steal my Ponyville mom, huh?” I asked to myself angrily as I started grinding my teeth once again, and while I was doing so, one of my top teeth chipped. “OW!” I yelled in pain. “Chipped a tooth!”